Planet of the Commercials - Nostalgia Critic

this episode brought to you by commercials this is a pets turn hey parents want to put all the hair your Roomba sucks up on top of it and say it's a pet enjoy and this is the kid who got it to come so it's that kind of toy okay I guess when I heard he got a robotic I should have put this together his sister made it go right or left just by clapping her hands just like a real cat hey Chaplin son their neighbor likes to play games with pets turn your parents will love the constant clapping noise this even less expressive Tribble will conjure up just loves him even though pet stirs batteries are not included that was a weird segue to that fact even though pet stirs batteries are not included you're the greatest kitty ever then there's a kid who let pet ster do its own thing well she did nothing at all itself your kids a lazy look up this melted ice cream Kitty to enable her the pester and pester deluxe with leash are sold separately Scott damn thing needs a leash yeah put this robot with batteries and moving parts on a rope kids won't use it as a weapon of pummeling at all yeah weak totally for a week commercial definitely puts the pester in pets there are sold separately by axe line I'm pets turn no you're not [Music] ha timeless classic if you're around my age you probably grew up with Flintstone vitamins help me be even younger as they still seem to be around one of the biggest draws to them was this cute little commercial with the sketchiest held jingle preferred by more moms than any other children's vitamin most dads would agree to if you ever came back home he just went out to get Flintstone cigarettes right actually it is plain that these characters are being used to sell healthy products considering the huge amount of unhealthy products they've sold in the past Winston is the one put the cigarette that delivers flavored 20 times a pack when you do for a beer Bush does it now daddy's has a placemat collection featuring The Flintstones you know they're in the same ballpark regardless this is still a nice commercial with a nice song that's sure to stay in your head [Music] and that's why we're interviewing the composer of that commercial today wait what that's right the chart says people want more intellectual conversation so you're going to interview the man who scored the music for this commercial but I don't want to interview some dumb lousy before you continue I should point out he's right behind you that bit died hi there hi there I'm Michael hello I'm the Nostalgia Critic you remember it so I don't have to yes I never realized how lame that sounded until you said it so tell me about writing the Flintstones vitamin jingle well it all started when we were approached to compose The Flintstones vitamins commercial no kidding well it wasn't just me it was me and Marty O'Donnell and we actually co-wrote it honestly the majority of it was his idea but we still collaborated together anyway I asked what the project was he said it was the Flintstones vitamins commercial I told him at the time that I didn't take Flintstones vitamins he assured me it was mostly for children that made me feel a little better with that in mind I decided to make the focus mainly on kids with kids singing the song in fact a little girl who sings and growing at the end do you know who she was that was my daughter yeah my daughter I remember she was so nervous about singing in the line but we assured her there was nothing to be nervous about so guess what after I told her there was nothing to be nervous about she found absolutely nothing to be nervous about fascinating but you know what's even more fascinating what you told that story to our blu-ray shelf you see he's a character on the show and the biggest biggest Flintstones vitamin fan really it just looks like an ordinary blu-ray shelf to me it's not it's like the most popular character on the show even though all it does is stand there and be quiet and people watch that it's the Internet ironic non humor there's probably a four-hour video of it just standing there or something kick it talking okay well anyway so we were thinking to putting the Flintstones characters into the commercial but then we thought about it and thought about it and thought about it and decided no woof next commercial kids don't have any real friends but the Internet isn't a thing yet my body [Music] yes whether your child alienated himself by setting fires using slurs or was just generally unlikable my buddy was there to substitute as a friend oh and don't forget kids sister yes even girls need someone to drag kids around while she uncomfortably ignores them yet forces them to watch as she plays alone Katie what are we doing here again look that's hilarious haha you know we always wondered if anybody grew up with my buddy like continually grew up with him did anyone actually still keep him as a friend honestly college my buddy might even be more useful than kid my buddy look at the ceiling what do you think college my buddy you get it man College my buddy comes with actual butts it's still a catchy song with an innocent feel just for a weird even kinda creepy product my buddy and kid sister each sold separately from play school you're looking at a very unusual kind of egg it ain't Easter yet but chances aren't you remember this one the Cadbury bunny is a trademark every holiday season for the Cadbury cream eggs with this adorable look constant clucking and ability to candy that tastes like chocolate and let's be honest a little like actual yeah I know a lot of people like this product but I never understood it especially after watching the commercials because let's face it the candy never looked as good as it did here I mean look at that it's like if a chocolate could have an orgasm it looks like the tastiest thing you could imagine the actual product well I'll give it this it does look like an abandoned pregnancy even when you try to do it delicately to get slow gooey look it looks like plastic man seaman it's like the most unappealing thing ever even the bunny's final cluck sounds like a warning not to buy them like you'll be sorry there was actually a controversy long ago because they made the size smaller over the years good the less of this oompa-loompa turd you can put in your body the better why they're the best thing to come along since the Easter Bunny had when he's gone they're gone what's interesting is these are the American commercials for the Cadbury bunny but Cadbury is a British company I'm kind of wondering what the bunny looks like in the UK take it easy mr. Newton Britain's bunny is a little um boo beer haven't you heard of cat please caramel as he is my fake cat race milk chocolate melts with that dreamy caramel take it easy with God please caramel there Cadbury bunny makes me think wrong things things I shouldn't do to bunnies see how to say Cadbury's milk chocolate melts into smooth golden caramel for years all Americans handle a Space Jam to quench the growing funny sex thirst there was this treasure trove for a select audience the whole time hey mr. beaver why are you being around that was not a mistake none of this is by accident I'm late for a very important date hey mr. rabbit why are you so touchy oh oh you make me wanna grow genitalia to explore you just have to take everything really easy that mall is going to replay that one second in his mind every day until he dies at ease yeah see how the thick cat race milk chocolate this is so sexualized yep she's talking so soothingly she must have a sex hotline as a side-job humans I am thinking about humans why don't you take it easy think about Cadbury chocolates okay you like chocolates don't you if you say so yes just imagine the sexiest lady in the world covered in chocolate melting all over her body okay is she sexy yes she's a funny oh come on sorry she was a bunny you like rabbits no it's the law why did they ever pass that law whether it's a cute bunny who likes to cluck or a cute bunny who likes to happy snowman these are interesting commercials to say the least take it easy with Cadbury's caramel hey OJ you sure enjoy that golden pioneer chicken this aged great oh yeah I love it if people knew this is what pioneer chicken meant by stop on it and get a free Oh Jake I don't think as many people would a drop I thank for relaxing with friends and enjoy Pioneer summer funds but yep there was a time when oh gee Simpson was the official spokesperson for this chain and let's just say the jokes write themselves well Vertica Vincent is a pleasant start to get a large pieces of golden pioneer chicken mashed potatoes gravy and coleslaw for just $6.99 you'll kill for chicken that's good and pioneers even got free coupons for Universal Studios tour take a stab at these deals Dolan pioneer chicken has a crispy crunchy taste I did it I have more than one biscuit wait a minute there's two of them that completely changes everything open the case back up there's new evidence man new evidence it's a great way to make new friends right brothers don't steal from me man I got ways of getting you back well at least you both agree on pioneers new butter real biscuits and if the glove don't fit him must have quit I know these commercials were harmless the time they were made so maybe I should look at it from the point of view of what was popular then like what were some hit comedies at the time the Naked Gun aw Christ why they're almost as good as my mama your mama yeah they were fine for what they were but a little uncomfortable now for what they are mama never told me about you oh great as if oj isn't busy enough tracking down the real killers wouldn't you agree Michael back where'd you come from well your blu-ray shelf enjoyed my story so much that he said I should come over and share him with you she's surprisingly interesting the more you listen thanks shelf ten million strong earned Gruen so at first we thought about writing a song and included the Flinstones names but then we discovered interestingly enough that there was no Betty vitamin that was because Betty was shaped too much like Wilma so they substituted her for a car isn't that funny you know this reminds me of another portion of the show this is our interviewing hole interviewing home yeah I was here when we moved in I don't know where it leads and one of the things we love to do is had people give interviews to it well like you said the internet beginner no that's right hop to it buddy okay so we asked ourselves it selves what were kids relate to most and we decided they'd relate to other kids so we got an adorable children's choir to sing over these it feels horrible shots of children trying to do things that big that's commercial with no sponge monkeys too normal for you maybe you should try the Good Humor popsicle commercials these ran from the late 90s to the early 2000s to enjoy them is simple press play on your controller do any assortment of these drugs and enjoy your new reality oh great it's like these were designed to be the trickiest ads ever usually having one kid liked the product some freaky happens and then the dog always like you're so friggin high nice throat doofus I can't anything the colors Duke the colors I'm carmine kid now in three flavors LSD tripping balls and watch the sea football fiction to bring her back Shannon Shannon can you hear me and what's really in catchphrase do they have to end every one of these on yeah every single one of them ends that way it's like ending your commercial with how the hell did that meeting go we need a catchphrase for these popsicles so how about popsicles ma will you marry me I can't act like they're not imaginative or memorable they're just freakin bizarre what can one say but popsicles from good-humour face so I don't usually do commercials from Egypt but trust me when I say this one deserves the attention it's for practical panda cheese says harmless enough but their ads are uniquely intimidating it usually starts with two or more people one of them asking if the other can get some panda cheese when the person declines this happens [Music] Vanda made under schnell this is how every one of them goes and it's kind of scary as hell the way he appears out of nowhere the way he stares at you that eerily creepy song everything about this is a world of no most of the time it's just him destroying something but sometimes it's attempted murder Jesus Christ bear even the music they play I'm sure originally when this was written it was a nice soothing song but here it's terrifying listen to it against this imagery tell me this isn't the most horrifying song you'll ever hear [Music] so yeah even the music's creepily uncomfortable this is so creepy I could legitimately just you know or maybe he was what was really on the ring tape the whole time it's terrifying this thing deserves his own creepy franchise I stacked up on a shitload of panda cheese products just so I never run the risk of ever seeing this thing so I guess it's effective just too effective if you ever want to sleep again it's a good ad but maybe a little too good then mate and Desna sways on joggers on ladies and gentlemen the coolest song you will ever hear for a toy commercial it's called charger Tron and I have no idea what it's supposed to be a transformer Hot Wheels or but it doesn't matter because the song is amazing robot it's like we're in a parallel universe where Depot wrote commercial jingles for confusing toys everything about it is a paradox it's so lazy yes so epic the singers clearly disinterested yep that sucks me anything more the song literally sings about what this thing does and I'm still not sure exactly what it does you must charge it charge occurred what more proof this was a weak transformers knockoff listen to their names there's Protagoras and anticodon right next to the auto nuts and acceptance but it doesn't matter that song is phenomenal it could be played for anything and it would sound amazing you could do everyday activities and it would sound epic as please I'll call back you down set the table with my place answer the door right now smile nice for your date make sure he does not find out you haven't start stop the bastard at gunpoint make sure he's not talking better bring the body now nothing's creepy nothing's jarring quite alarming this is scary charger Tron this was an aperture chitron sorry for the confusion a cheap toy and okay add but one hell of a cool ass song each sold separately uh-huh DL I feel like you would know being a songwriter business how Oh amazing have that whole led to a kingdom of mold people who were nice enough to bring me back he's surprisingly interesting the more you listen thanks for 10 million strong and glowing so anyway when we wrote The Flintstones vitamins commercial we thought there was concerned that people would think it was a tie end of the show Flintstones kids amazing how the postman was in the desert and knew to drop me off here so anyway there was a concern that people who confuse our Flintstones kids with the show Flintstones kids have you ever seen the show Flintstones kids actually yes well I haven't anyway we thought it wouldn't be a big deal so we decided to go ahead with it anyway now I never have to deal with that Meiji composer again huh weird next commercial this is annoying sometimes younger people ask me why certain things caught on once in a while I have to say I have no goddamn clue the NOI commercials for Domino's Pizza is one of those times animated by the late great animator well Vinton it always was impressive on a technical level but I just didn't get it what was the noid why did he want to ruin pizzas why is he dressed like he's ready to lure children into his van and obviously the biggest question out of all the pizzas to ruin why Domino's isn't it already pretty ruined Pizza the noid hate on quality pizza he loves to make you a hot pizza ice so he doesn't need to stop by this place often I mean if your pizza is glowing there's clearly something wrong with it or again it's just Domino's it's a wicked wizard his popularity exploded with t-shirts action figures there was even a Nintendo game on him what was the plot pause the fatality of Little Caesar what the hell were we celebrating a pizza terrorist what's the idea that because he was trying to destroy Domino's he was a hero in the pizza world maybe he was hired by the true Neapolitan pizza Association the noise just can't beat the best Domino's Pizza Domino's maybe after hard objects are not supposed to eat but accidentally did at some point hopefully when you were younger I don't know why this was the thing but it was animated nice I guess harmlessly silly again if you keep your kids far far away either avoid noise Domino's Pizza deliveries call now perhaps it was the noid who should have avoided me it's the new Star Wars lightsaber you can pretend you have powers when okay those are condoms none of those words should be said in this situation I know there's been variations on lightsaber toys over the years some better than others but you could literally find your dad's trojans and slip them on a flashlight to get the exact same effect this is very uncomfortable Jimmy mom says I'm not allowed to be in the same room with you and the lights are off again especially with these toys this looks like the last thing I ever see before Colt kills me when you switch on Kenner's Star Wars lightsaber you sure this was a Spaceballs merchandise that kid is like yeah this will be the size I'll need one day a Star Wars lightsaber new from Kenner yeah the commercial standard but these things are uncomfortably weird I know like how Star Wars will become the more you think about it Star Wars lightsaber balloons not included before so sleep with this one talk to your aunts this is an ad for a game version of cliffhanger the old Sylvester Stallone movie you don't think you could do anything that crazy with it but it gets pretty out there pretty fast so I hear your grades dang you don't look healthy either as anyone who's seen cliffhanger knows all conflict is 100% role-based though it will not settle for discount clearance Tigers it ends with him out of nowhere swinging on a chandelier and shouting one of my favorite out-of-context lines there is no argument for not loving this it's super short but it goes batshit so fast it's hard not to get a laugh I think I like to see Stallone say this line not just in cliffhanger but any movie where he finishes a guy off but they would all have to end with an old lady being force-fed a rolls it just feels naked without it pretty silly but pretty funny too this is always a good combination with anything still unrelated cliffhanger from Sonia mr. Sher it's just a game it's an alien no kidding where if anyone is wondering who came up with a sitcom around a dick knows moldy Muppet it was this guy the colors Duke the colors the thing is Alf was a weird creation and he's made even weirder by these kids reactions to him as a toy all of them just look uncomfortable he's debonair yet fuzzy okay I mean this whole cat thing's been blown all out of proportion what he did to the cat how many kittens are his it doesn't matter my parents just don't understand a relationship what are these kids doing with this doll again with a nose shaped like that I don't think it's wise to leave it to the imagination as we seen this other commercial kids that play with Alf are many flavors of odd and when he looked up he saw the man with the eyes yeah that's as creepy as the man whose hands had fingers what story was that and now it's his turn it all started back when I was a kid on melmac death toll at least talks in this one so we can better understand why these commercials are just so darn uncomfortable you know to get the show I had to sleep with Harvey Weinstein everything you've read about him isn't as bad as you think it's light years work it's not that you want to prostitute yourself for money it's that God gave you no other choice the lowest point is when I thought I was eating a cat but it was really a dead-eyed monstrosity called a pet stir I was so drunk but I ask myself every day would I do it all again no let's be honest it would explain why everybody was so often these commercials they're weird and awkward I guess I won't expect anything else from Alf storytelling Alf extra cassettes sold separately batteries not included new from calico Oh kill me this is an air for a protein drink can't you just tell I guess this is a banana flavored one as it keeps insisting that we stop eating the monkeys food this is obviously referencing the ring and honestly we've seen that imagery so many times it's really that scary anymore hell I even show clips of it earlier to prove a point so yeah give me what you got terrifying ring girl yeah long hair backward movement seen it all I have to admit I expected to see more out of this idea by this point a mime access twice the cops twenty times more protein stop patient - that's always gonna be there when I close my eyes now isn't it yeah there it is okay well done okay I'll just let you leave when you're nice and ready of the commercial like a no max will it heal my scars okay if you disturb easily warning these are from Britain yeah Britain's PSAs in the last few episodes I've done have gained quite a reputation of being unpleasant to say the least so let's see how this latest batch goes over if you hit me at 40 miles an hour does around it 80% chance I'll die charming [Music] oh I do hope they show this during Thomas and Friends hit me at 13 and there's around an 80% chance of live or how about the better lesson of just don't hit any kids she's a good message but man how about a positive way to get the idea across okay how cute cartoon this should be better the boy who didn't stop look and listen of course that's the title he loved to play football all day but the boy didn't cross in a safe place a car hit him in quantum vents and now he cannot play football cuz his leg broke in more than one place bottom line you can never have fun with a broken leg it's British law we were gonna kill him to get our point across better but a dartboard of human innocence it's running out of room oh and don't worry there's a sequel the girl who didn't dress bright in the dark a car drove right into her coats and covered her with Bruzzi cuts that's right even what you wear can kill you enjoy existing kids hug again I give credit trying to get a really good message across but man these are messed up which I know it's the point but man these are messed up I'm gonna see if their neighbor Ireland has any more chipper PSAs she's got a smile that it seems to me seems more pleasant she is this even a PSA it looks more like a car commercial [Music] yeah I think it is certainly feels more like one a bunch of kids playing outside a parent coming to pick them up and a shiny vehicle a kid holding a toy of that vehicle all right I can review this is a charming little car commercial it's honestly very soothing with a nice song its Emmet ography oh my god since 2000 speeding has killed a classroom of our children a bloody skeleton finger what if the person watching doesn't drive what if they're unable to drive what if they're kids the kids apparently this got so much backlash it was allowed to only be shown after 9:00 p.m. watching that look Billy that's the last face you can make before your car to death go back to watching their family shows after seeing this there's no coming back from that it's just too extreme it's too intense Ireland is the new Britain the order now is Ireland as the new Britain and Britain is the new Canada so now the question is who's gonna be the new Ireland who's gonna be the new Ireland amazing that life was discovered on Mars the moment I landed there and they were nice enough to fly me back to my home planet thanks perplex 10 million strong so anyway what I was telling you before okay stop stop stop nobody cares about your damn fighting the commercial that you wrote or co-wrote or whatever so you wrote a catchy jingle big deal you're still thinking nobody that nobody in the musical world will ever remember you are nothing I know one another word that begins with nose you are the bottom of the barrel of any form of caring you hear me I didn't know you felt will I do everybody does the whole friggin universe dies whenever incredible musical accomplishments are talked about nobody will ever say the name Michael no what's your last name Salvatori nobody will ever mention the name Michael Salvatori [Music] [Music] [Music] No twist on charter Tron supersonic machines hey Doug Walker here a kid again is this week's charity shout out for 20-plus years a kid again has helped to restore a sense of normal for families thrust into a situation of having to care for a child with a life-threatening illness often these families are unprepared and unequipped to deal with what follows a kid again hosts year-round events to support these families and provide them with memories that will last a lifetime they make life for families caring for a child with a life-threatening illness normal again by helping them gain back moments of positive family shared experiences and memories this year alone they've served over 12,000 638 people and since their start they've helped over two hundred and six thousand 460 people if you look at their site you can see all the events all the effort and all the families they help in giving children a chance to be a child once more click on the link and see how you can make a big difference in the life of a child an adult and a family you [Music]

Channel: Channel Awesome

Views: 1,146,947

Keywords: channel awesome, nostalgia critic, commercials, retro commercials, tv commercials, old commercials, nostalgic, nostalgic commercials, 80s commercials, 90s commercials, 70s commercials, commercials review, weird commercials, funny commercials, retro, doug walker, halo, halo music, planet of the commercials, nostalgia critic commercials, doug walker commercials, television commercials, the flintstones

Id: VMQUHuE58q0

Length: 36min 23sec (2183 seconds)

Published: Wed Nov 20 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/usernamechecksout94]

I think this was my favorite guest appearance

[u/Floopy-2222]

What’s gonna be the new Ireland?