Pet Sematary Two (1992) KILL COUNT

[Music] welcome to the kill cow where we tally up the victims in all our favorite horror movies I'm James agent east and today we're looking at Pet Sematary 2 released in 1992 let me tell you right up top that this movie's insane if you've never seen it before you're in for a fucking ride my friends I don't even want to spoil any of the craziness that's headed your way so let's just say that Clancy Brown giggling at rabbit sex is at the bottom of this movie's list of weird shit Pet Sematary 2 was directed by Mary Lambert who helmed the original film a surprising fact given that this sequel is nothing like the first one maybe because unlike that first film Pet Sematary 2 was not written by Stephen King in some ways no I think it ends up working out cuz while the first film sometimes felt like a book trying unsuccessfully to be a movie Pet Sematary 2 has no pretenses about what it is it's comfortable being a non-stop crazy train and ends up being arguably more entertaining because of it does that entertainment result in more kills let's find out and get to them the movie begins in a Gothic Castle what did I accidentally put in a universal monster movie now turns out this is just a set for a crappy looking horror flick starring ranae hallow which is the character's name not the actor so don't get confused renee is mother to the whiniest little shitbag I've ever had to deal with on the kill count Jeff Matthews jeff has played by Edward Furlong and is currently trying to get his parents back together since they recently separated but don't get your hopes up kid over half of all marriages end up getting terminated this slapdash said ends up fatally dangerous after some jackass knocks a power box thing right into a pool of water since renee happened to be kneeling in a puddle she gets shocked into convulsions the electricity coursing through her body and the what actually metal fence prop there that shit would be foam for show she ends up dying against the great while Jeff screams this puberty out and we get a decent shot of gore when they peel her face off some fats you Jeff's dad a veterinarian named chase Matthews who's played by Anthony Edwards gets notified of his wife's death at work while he's right in the middle of putting a dog to sleep yo fuck you Pet Sematary - nobody wants to see a fluffy good boy get euthanized by a nerd Renee's funeral held in her hometown of Ludlow Maine is played by paparazzi was she really that famous and actor cuz it looked like she was acting in a full moon quality picture oh and by the way the minister at this funeral is not played by Stephen King because King made sure his name was nowhere near this weird ass movie chase decides to move to Ludlow in order to get Jeff out of Los Angeles and to help out around the house he hires Marjorie Hargrove a character who I promise you'll forget about entirely until the end of this video right now though she's telling chase how big a fan she was of his late wife's work and then gets extra creepy about it when a box of Renee's clothes falls in front of her and she basically tries some of it ah this is what she wore the Emmys isn't it hey don't touch his stuff only I can touch her stuff okay they go to the site of chases new animal practice which is almost as dirty as it is brown but that's okay cuz in a backroom Jeff finds a box of adorable kitties oh my god great so now I've opened up an orphanage - yeah dude a kiddy orphanage what are you bitching about chase hasn't opened the place yet but his new kiddie concierge is already greeting their first customer Zowie yeah what is that a Husky Malibu - whatever this dog's breed he's the best damn dog actor I've seen since Auggie in the artist now he's person is drew who's come here with a stepdad Gus Gilbert sheriff of Ludlow and founder of the Krusty Krab hope that's his only experience with crabs though cuz he immediately starts telling Jeff about how he used to bang his dead mom kill you mother and I used to be sweethearts really prom homecoming whole nine yards he had got a love Clancy Brown last seen on the kill count trying to stay awake in the Nightmare on Elm Street remake in this movie he's the only one even trying to do a Maine accent although sadly there's not a single ayah to be heard Jeff goes to his courthouse looking new school the next day and somehow smuggles is Khitan into class no friggin way that cat wouldn't jump out of his jacket at the first sight of a pen after class Jeff gets harassed by Clyde Parker a bully played by Tom Hanks's friended big who teases Jeff for having a dead mom and then catnaps his kids yo where the teachers in this school a super exciting bike chase begins during which the kid playing Clyde actually holds this kitten while riding his bike and even screams in its cute little face [Music] yeah I think that meow means no dick they ride past the Creed house which is definitely not the same house they used in the original and wind up at the also totally different Pet Sematary trail cried tells Jeff that his kitty is in the cemetery that makes another dead mom joke which earns him a jab to the face and a punchy grunty roll around Clyde wins the scuffle and bikes away with his goons leaving Jeff by himself to walk down the trail and enter the pet cemetery pretty solemn place to be hon Jeff really makes you think about what don't kick that dog grave what the fuck dude he finds us kitten in a bird cage and rescues it from it's ironic prison then gets a heady vertigo zoom looking at the land damned Mi'kmaq burial grounds barrier at Drew's house Gus stares creepily as a couple of his rabbits do the Humpty hump do the Humpty hump what you doing with another rabbit there on your thigh Gus I don't like that yeah maybe put that fluffy boy away and figure out a healthier outlet for your sexual energy uh no ma'am I didn't mean feeling up your wife in the kitchen as her son watches with a not this shit again look on his face Gus and drew don't get along at all Gus won't let his stepson watch hockey at the dinner table he makes him keep his dog outside and he insults his portion sizes I thought we were gonna tone down on your fat ass damn this kid's life must suck especially because you know Gus is gonna be purposefully loud in bed while he's screwing his mom when Zowie tries to get in to Gus's rabbit cage it breaks the big man's concentration and nobody gives Byron Hadley blue balls so Gus goes outside with his rifle and holy shit just frigging shoots that dog yo come on Amanda stop looking at me like that yeah I only shot your son's pet I don't need your judgment drew finds our bleeding by a tree and the scene would be a whole lot sadder if it wasn't for the fact that you know this good boy dog actor got lots of tasty treats for doing such a good job here haha he's so cute holla slow it's kind of hard to take this scene seriously when you've got a sappy song playing in the background with some vocals that end up getting a little Jack Black Bear if we goo good news buddy the next day drew tells Jeff that zowie's dead baby now he's dead so the two of them carry this dog carcass through the public pet cemetery and over the barrier to the secret pet cemetery the Indian burial ground one which once again got a recommend our podcast episode featuring Joey Clift where we talk about that trope in horror movies drew tells Jeff about the burial grounds supposed powers and Jeff don't take too kindly to the idea I know your dog died but get a grip man you're freaking me out but Drew is undeterred and when they get to the burial grounds he knows that you have to bury your own so he gets to digging a grave for his beloved Zowie and when he's done he tops the plot off with a care for any hikers in the area then he and Jeff sit down and chew some gum okay yeah I cut out the dialogue in those clips there but still who made the choice to have these kids chomping on gum for an entire scene whatever at least we get another awesome aerial shot that shows off the impressive burial grounds as they leave that's pretty damn cool looking and Wow does that shot go high is that thing on a helicopter that night drew finds out the Zoey has come back a smile dog but he can't be too happy about it not only because it's always not a good boy anymore but also cuz Gus grounds him for lying about his dog being dead okay they call chase over in his pet ambulance or whatever so Zoey can go to the ER which in this case is just the Matthews house Jeff's understandably tepid about having an undead dog as a houseguest especially since he's already got an adorable little bed kid ha cute little kitty open doesn't get too scared of the dog had two dead mom rocking in a chair in Jeff's room so sure that was just a dream but unfortunately for Jeff the scary zombie dog in a rocking chair is totes for real after three days now ease wounds still haven't started healing yet so chase takes a blood sample and puts him in the kennel although it looks more like a circus cage with that thing prowling around in it careful there little orphan kiddies now it's Halloween all of a sudden and although Drew was grounded by Gus his mom Amanda helps him put on his best Dracula makeup and lets him go out he and Jeff who's just like Jason for the split us up seconds go to the pet cemetery where both of their undead costumes would feel quite welcome that is until a ghost mom falls onto Jeff and knocks him to the ground goddamn dude do bullies really tease people with dead parents this much no what's that little Don King kid so damn smiley about close your mouth jackass Clyde takes off his face patios long enough to tell all these underage drinkers the story of Lewis Creed which in three short years has become something of an urban legend unfortunately for these kids in their story time it turns out Goss came home early tonight and found drew missing from the house so now he's here at the cemetery sending these minors in possession running further records Gus grabs drew and domestically abuses his face with a punch or is that police brutality you know what dude I think it's both Gus socks before things can get even uglier now we the zombie dog shows up and jumps on to Gus knocking him to the ground after a few minutes of growling and rasslin the ex carcass canine tears away at Gus's neck flash how easily this zombie dogs a one-and-done er cuz Gus dies instantly with his gnarly internet meets all exposed ice although Gus was the world's biggest do sure these kids immediately decide to bring the bastard back from the dead yeah give the psycho cop zombie power great idea guys holla so it's hilarious how the movie skips past the part where these two 13 year olds log six more Clancy Brown up a mountain the rain that night doesn't keep Gus from coming back and after peeping in on Jeff there he goes to his own home and scares the crap out of drew made a show and this ladies and gentlemen is when clancy brown's performance goes from competent to incredible because zombie Gus is what single-handedly makes this movie kind of Awesome in fact Clancy Brown was nominated for an acting award from Fangoria for the performance too bad it was the same year as Silence of the Lambs her else this might have taken it drunk zombie ghost wraps up his neck wound and then goes to bed where he sexually assaults Amanda but we don't need to see that here it's not like the movie pays it any importance instead it skips ahead to the next day when Drew tells Jeff that Gus was pretty cool to him that morning it was almost acting like a real dad meanwhile Jeff's real dad chase gets the results from zowie's blood samples and bad news goose the diagnosis is that dog be dead even worse that dead dog be gone I'll spare you the shot of bloody orphan kitten bits no evidence that Zowie had a feast of felines on his way out chase visits dr. Yeoh Lander who this movie claims was Ludlow's town vet during the Creed family incident but I watched that first movie and I don't know him in truth this guy is only here to tell chase about the cemetery's powers and laughs maniacally with his stuffed animals to some grunge music [Music] that l7 track plays over a montage of Gus got in rabbits like he's in a Michael Moore movie zombie Gus is efficient and messy as Jeff sees when he comes over to Druce for dinner that night [Applause] yo drill when did Gus get so cool oh man Gus is awesome now yeah over at the Matthews house chase is watching his dead ex-wife in a movie where she gets shot and killed what are you doing dude that's not gonna be good for your mental health that's proven later that night when he's sleeping in a bed of blue light chase has a real sensual wet dream that looks like it's taking place in Tommy Wiseau's bed and after dream Renee talks of a potential reunion things somehow get even more bizarre oh no dog head on chase can't seem to stop chase no that's at least half a rebel did he finally wakes up only to find a zombie dog sitting in his lap wowee Zowee that was not cool dude now he attacks him and they get into a feathery pillow fight and when chase tries to shoot the undead dog it just straight-up jumps through a freaking window wow that dog actor is Doe the next morning Jeff is riding his bike home from Drew's house when motorbike and Clyde rolls up and grabs Jeff's handlebars to drive him off the road my friends and I used to do shit like that on our bikes we called them speeder bike wars it was very dangerous Clyde threatens to take off Jeff's nose with his bike tire spokes but before he can actually do it he stopped by a zombie sheriff Gus tells Jeff to go home because I guess now he likes this little wiener kid and then gets straight back to hitting kids looks like zombie Gus is a lot like normal Gus only zombie Gus takes it one step further after he grabs quiets dirt bike we're doing that actually Gus is being for real despite his silly tongue waggling cuz Clyde scarf gets caught up in the bike tyre and it leads to the boys messy death might as well finish what you started Gus ten boy howdy does e when he's done with that dirtbike Clyde's face is no more than a puppy max turns out Gus's anti-bullying outreach had an audience of one and now that Gus has blood in his eyes he chases after drew and scares him wee wee wee all the way home drew grabs a gun but apparently zombie Gus had some foresight in that dead brain of his I guess oh who drew buddy Gus ends up with a hammer and with zombies always help chases drew upstairs where he closes the door just in time to stop this awesome dog actors door attack drew climbs out the window right as his mom Amanda gets home and after he gets in the car Gus leaps onto the windshield like the Meese Tommy stole ad that y'all wish you had an air-conditioner right now don't you they drive away and Gus runs after them before realizing oh yeah I have a car of my own I should just go get that and first we get a car chase set to the Jesus and Mary Chain 'sheriff zombie Gus eventually catches up to Drew and Amanda and rams them in front of a truck that crushes their car like a pop can oh no and then they get covered in potatoes Gus they had just gotten serious about the Atkins diet by the way I'm not adding the truck-driver to the list because even though his vehicle ends up pretty racked I think it was far safer than the one that left drew in demand all bloody with fries Gus returns to Clyde's body so he can bury him in the mi'kmaq round so that night the news reports quite as missing after filling Chase in on drew and Amanda's starchy deaths chase goes to break the news to Geoff but finds him being a creeper in the Attic what you doing there Geoff getting things ready for movie Oh that's concerning Geoff is all of a sudden even more insufferable as he tells his dad has planned to bring Rene back there's just place in the woods if you bury something there it comes back to you chase grabs Geoff by the scruff of his clothes but right in the middle of this kids awful smirk the dad is interrupted by a phone call the call was from the cemetery caretaker who shows chase that his wife's body is missing after Gus came and took it for quote-unquote police purposes yeah or for a hot zombie day Geoff goes and meets up with Gus who's but now apparently working for the little shit he'll cuz he hand delivers Rene's corpse and reminds Geoff of the burial grounds rules you bury your own seriously when did these two become besties did that all come from one burp at the dinner table Jase drives over to Gus's house and immediately he gets attacked by Zowie who bikes into his shoulder before chase shoots him a few times scaring him off chase goes inside to find the place with new interior designed by John Murray and Gus in the kitchen working with power tools looks like chases gunshots finally put Zowie down for good and now he's gonna try the same trick with Gus but Gus don't go down so easy so they get into a fight where Gus sadistically drills in to chase his shoulder wound and tries his hand at a Freddie like one-liner no pain not bad for a first-timer ghosts keep it up but Gus doesn't keep it up because eventually chase gets the gun back and shoots Gus through the chin with it Gus stumbles back and Clancy Brown does a good stunt fall pulling a cabinet down on top of him and as always I'm not putting a zombie killer on the list because that could get real messy in future movies back at the Matthews Hall Marjorie wakes up from a couch nap remember her he had now you do but I bet you had forgotten about her just like I said you would she follows the noise into the attic where she finds Renee's fineries and gets real excited about them after playing a bit of dress-up with the dead woman's clothes she gets her comeuppance when she finds that Renee has returned do you really think it could be like me Renee takes a mirror shard and kills Marjorie with it off-screen but we see her body in a little bit and it's pretty gnarly her eye all cut up and the mirror shard lodged in her head Jeff peers Marjorie's murderer and he don't give a single goddamn about the housekeeper he's just happy to have his mom back which he shows with the creepiest smile imaginable you know aside from all his other smiles in this movie chase comes home and after finding Marjorie dead he finds his ex-wife Undead and she tells him that they can get back together and be a whole creepy little crappy family again but chase ain't in the zombie fucking business you know unless they're half dog so he sends Jeff downstairs so the grown-ups can have a discussion when Jeff goes to leave though he finds Ammi bully quide Crippen a line from Chuckie wanna play the undead bully attacks Jeff while his undead mom laughs about it that's gotta be Ross and as if their fight wasn't theatrical enough what would the vile and the biting and the eye gouging Renee kicks it up a notch by lighting a fire right there on the floor Jeff dodges an axe swing from Clyde and it goes into an electrical box instead so Jeff grabs one of the severed cables and stuffs it into quiets mouth it's another zombie kill that won't go on the count but I'm definitely gonna let y'all enjoy it because just as I had hoped for the zombie bully's head blows up boom baby Jeff tends to his dad who was knocked out during that zombie bully fight while his mom stands on a bed behind him hi can't really see her back there think we could maybe get like a crash zoom on her face while she says scorpions catchphrase perfect Renae starts cracking open and melting and I guess that makes this bloody boy finally realize that yeah maybe you don't want your zombie mom to be the one with custody no no I'm good turns out one parents enough Jeff helps his dad off the ground and they leave the Attic as Rene screams for him to stay trying to sell him on the merits of dead zombie life then all her skin melts off and she becomes a skeleton a skeleton standing on a bed that's just that's just great the movie ends with confirmation that at least Jeff's kitten survived and then the father and son getting the hell out of that town while the very weird in memoriam happens for all the characters who died in this movie you know like Rene and Gus and uh wait who the hell was that this movie was more gory than the first film but did it have as many kills let's find out at the numbers only six people died in Pet Sematary two so no that's fewer than the first movie and I didn't count zombies in either of them there were three male victims and three female victims giving us one of those rare even pie charts and with a runtime of a hundred minutes we had to kill on average every sixteen point six seven minutes I'll give the golden chainsaw four coolest kill to Clyde it's an easy pick for me using a dirt bike tire is pretty unique and it's got the shock factor that it happens to a freaking teenager to almost shuddhi for lamest kill will go to Renee cuz I think it looks downright silly the way she's shaking around like that the only good part is the bit of singed skin on her cheek and that's it Pet Sematary two came out in 1992 and after this movie there was not a pet cemetery three shocking I know we are getting a reboot remake whatever on April 5th which I'll cover you should know this by now after it comes out on blu-ray until then I'm James a Jenice this has been the kill cow thanks a lot for watching this kill count I won't thank a couple of patrons like Vesper Zak HG Garry story and Anthony Kehoe raw potato tastes like shit I also didn't wash it before I did that so it just tasted like dirt dude can't believe french fries come from that hope you guys have been enjoying my movie selections for this year so far I've been trying to do ones that people request a lot which is also the case for next week's movie thanks be good people

Channel: Dead Meat

Views: 6,480,521

Keywords: horror, dead meat, movies, scary, films, kills, kill count, body count, james a. janisse, jaj, pine commander boogie, sequel, pet, sematary, cemetery, semetary, cemetary, new, remake, reboot, franchise, clancy brown, dog, zombie, undead, mary lambert, stephen king, steven king, edward furlong, anthony edwards, jared rushton, DMKC

Id: WYh9ffbF1yE

Length: 20min 38sec (1238 seconds)

Published: Fri Mar 01 2019