People who sleep naked, when has it backfired?

askreddit people who sleep naked when has it backfired there was one morning in high school when my dad decided to wake me up for school by ripping the covers off me in bed that was the last time that happened we all know rude awakenings are the cause behind nude sleeping what are you doing daddy my dad wouldn't let me have an alarm clock i have hearing loss that he didn't believe in and wouldn't let me get the old-fashioned clanging alarm which is the only one that would wake me up so he would come in every morning to wake me up for school super irritating anyway i wasn't naked but one morning when i was in high school my boob had migrated out of my tank top while i was sleeping my dad just kind of kept facing the door like walking backwards and shook my foot till i woke up we didn't make eye contact for a few days after that i had a closet-sized single dorm room and people would always pull the fire alarm in the middle of the night and we'd all have to go outside one time i was so drowsy i just walked out instinctively and halfway down the hall i raced back thankfully this was an old building so i didn't get locked out of the room either i'll burn or i'll make it out alive but i'm going to wear pants my buddy's apartment burned down a few years ago it was already engulfed by the time he woke up his arms upper back and he's got pretty ducked up running out of it in his t-shirt still pretty purple to this day he took a few seconds to put on his work pants and boots probably saved his life definitely saved his junk i used to sleep naked now i own a cat those two overlapped for only a week yep morning wood and cats don't mix one time they attack it and you'll sleep with shorts on after that penis equals scratching post for cats this eye has happened to me before but both cats decided that that would be a good wake-up call i don't know if i would call it backfired but when the suicidal girl that's staying the night at your brother's house because they're watching this girl for suicide reasons wakes you up in the middle of the night and is sitting right on top of you telling you that you have to talk her down right then and there or she's going to kill herself in front of you yeah you would probably just rather be clothed for that encounter i locked myself out of my flat whilst sleepwalking one my girlfriend was on holidays so i had to wait until morning borrow a towel off a neighbor and then walk about a mile up the road to the estate agents to get a spare key i would have lent more than a towel geez i will give them my nicest please never return these to me outfit been sleeping in the raw since i was a kid and would fidget out of my pjs i think it used to bug my mother but she finally gave up every girlfriend would start out the relationship by joining me but over time would end up with the conventional night clothes hasn't backfired on me yet i'm your nemesis i sleep with a t-shirt shorts and socks on i normally don't do this but one summer night i had a meal from my local mexican place that i love since i was busy that day i didn't have lunch and decided to get significantly more than what i normally order to cure the hangry i also did not get an opportunity to poop that day since it was unusually hot that night i decided to ditch everything and sleep bear after one very realistic dream of me on the toilet let's just say that i had to get a new set of bed sheets the next morning [ __ ] happens i was at a hotel and the fire alarm went off i had to very quickly find clothes get dressed it was a legit small fire too i always sleep with pants on at hotels i don't want to find out the hard way that they don't wash the sheets well enough i was in a hotel once just laying on the bed trying to go to sleep and the people above me were straight up doing it in the bed and all you could hear is the creaking but finally after like five minutes i just heard a groan and it all stopped i started somewhere in high school because of night sweats in college i moved into an on-campus apartment alone and the very next morning i woke up to three grown mid 50s dudes with their faces in my window my bed was directly below the window university housing gave some bs excuse about my window needing maintenance just my window specifically none of the others in the entire complex the window wasn't even designed to open i think they were being pigs but i was 1000 miles away from anyone who cared about me and just let it go did you not have any blinds or blankets why wouldn't they provide you with blinds if so i had blinds and they were closed but they were looking down at me from above with my bed being directly below the window a normal passerby wouldn't see anything but someone pressed against the glass like they were could peer down and see what's below the window they were cheap apartment blinds never chased a burglar down the stairs through the kitchen and out my front door without wearing a shred of clothing and no weapon in hand the power of nakedness what were you yelling out of curiosity and did they have a weapon themselves edit wow 100 plus likes this was the first time that's ever happened to me thanks y'all woke up and saw a person prowling around in my hallway launched myself out of bed and into a dead sprint screaming get the duck out or die i was blinded by fear and rage i don't recall seeing a weapon but had they had one i was defenseless and would have been in a really bad spot had they chosen to use it the burglar didn't say anything i'm assuming they just panicked and their first instinct was to run guess they didn't want to fight a naked guy when in uni my room was right in front of the university so when looking out my windows you would look straight into classrooms so one day the inevitable happened i had forgotten to close the curtains at night you couldn't see me while i was in bed due to the head of the bed obstructing the window however getting out of the bed would expose my entire naked body to the world so any board student whose site was wandering off outside the classroom window could get a nice viewing of my naked body the way i fixed it was by simply rolling up in my bed sheets and sort off hop to my curtains and my bed sheet roll i am male btw so i didn't have to cover up breasts a few years ago i was working a night shift and had just returned home at 7 00 am i was so tired that i didn't close the front door properly after i activated the house alarm i went to my room and undressed myself and went to bed i wake up to the alarm blaring and i look around my room as i hear yelling i see there are two female cops in the house with their guns out and one of them was pointing it at me i'm half asleep and not really understanding what was going on the officer asked if i lived here to which i said yes then she ordered me to show her my id my id which was in my wallet was on my dresser i pointed her to where my wallet was she ordered me to show it to her and i said i couldn't get up because i was naked under my blanket so while still pointing her gun at me she opened up my wallet after that the cops left and after securing the front door properly i went back to sleep my favorite part is that two trained professionals found it conceivable and even probable that someone broke in to take a morning nap like ducking goldilocks i've been sleeping naked for over 40 years and so far it hasn't caused me any problems anywhere basic training getting called out of bed because someone fell asleep on guard duty my private was standing at attention at ease i was at a house fire once during the night and the homeowner slept naked when we arrived he was running around his front yard naked with a garden hose thankfully he was not injured and we were able to salvage most of his belongings and the one thing he said is that he learned to now sleep with shorts on my dad always sleeps in the nude one day the neighbor's house across the street caught fire after the gas-powered water heater exploded he could hear the homeowner screaming for help all the way from inside our house so still naked he ran into the burning house and carried her out firefighters said if he had been wearing clothes the heat from inside the burning building would have ignited them and he would possibly have burned to death i've always slept naked but the heater in my room was broken and it was getting too cold even with layers of blanket i woke up that morning and knew i had the house to myself at least till late afternoon so i continued snoozing in my sister's room with the heater on the next thing i knew i heard voices coming up the stairs it was my sister and her friends i guess they decided to ditch school and thought i wasn't home i had no other choice but to roll over and hide under the bed they were hanging out in that room for a good two hours and i was under the bed completely naked the whole time that was almost 15 years ago and she still has no idea casually sits under bed for two hours completely naked i got super drunk in a hotel room and passed out naked woke up confused about my surroundings for some reason and left the room walked down a hall naked for some reason my wife guided me back to bed i guess it didn't backfire since nobody saw me that i know of but that hotel has actually since burned down in a suspicious fire taking i can never go back there to the extreme i see when my little cousin who is a male pulled my blankets off to wake me up he was not expecting his oldest female cousin to be completely nude that was a very awkward moment it was at that moment timmy didn't like legos anymore fortunately nothing yet for me personally although tbh i don't sleep naked too often especially this time of year a university flatmate had a boyfriend with a supposedly fairly bent dog she claimed it was the result of a night time falling out of bed landing penis first with an erection crunch once when raz in college knocked at my door in the middle of the night and it took me a second to get up and get dressed they were suss of me other than that being nothing but great even got my partner hooked on sleeping the same way sus up what though 99 of the time they're suspicious of the residents hiding drugs or alcohol my freshman year and ra knocked on the door because they had caught a couple of residents with drugs in the stairwell and were doing check-ins with all the residents i cleaned up my old candy and junk food wrappers before opening cause i had an embarrassing amount out on my desk i ended up getting a verbal warning because the ra thought the rustling was me hiding stuff when i was younger a teenager a sibling came in and ripped off my blankets edit please someone correct me if i am wrong but i believe my punctuation is correct i am was the teenager apparently in question for example i a teenager ate a salad for dinner or when i was old an elder i was elected chairman of the board the teenager and your sibling sound very rude i was in middle school and had been sleeping naked under the covers for years while my parents would come in and wake me up somehow my body always managed to stay the blanket by the time morning rolled around so i was never worried about someone coming in in the morning only to see my bare self exposed well one saturday i was sleeping in and there was some event that my parents wanted to go to along with my older sister and me they asked her to go in and wake me so that i could get ready my several years long streak of successfully being hidden by the blanket ended that day as my bare ass was exposed to the door of my bedroom i woke up to the sound of my sister screaming at the top of her lungs shouting you why do you sleep naked i just remember thinking i can't believe that after all that time of people coming into my room and waking me up with me being under the blanket the one time i wasn't full under was the one time my sister came in getting my period in my bfs bed i'm on a bcp that makes it impossible to know when it's coming on maybe every four weeks maybe heaving spotting a week later i just don't know fortunately he is super chill every time it happens i think being with him induces my periods he goes out of town for a week or two nothing he comes back sploosh your body is basically going oh [ __ ] our dong is back time to turn everything back on again not really backfiring per se but this made and makes my wife laugh whenever she thinks about it a few weeks ago we heard a crash at about 2 30 a.m i groggily grabbed my nine millimeters short gun is locked up downstairs while i research new safes and went to investigate i cleared the entire house back naked i went back to bed locked my nine millimeters back in its case next to my bed and laid down about two minutes passed before we both started laughing hysterically about me walking through the house naked with a gun i was in the mental hospital and my roommates and i were pretty close so i was fine sleeping in my underwear sleeping there sucks so i'd do anything to get a little more comfortable anyways you get 15 minute checks there even through the night i guess i wasn't ready when they shined the flashlight in and i covered up quickly i got in trouble and was put on boundary precautions there was a red dot by my name on the whiteboard so everyone knew from then on i had to sit one couch square away from everyone carefully monitored for the rest of my stay so i didn't get too close to my mental peers never been married twice pajama wife my ex and naked wife the marriage with naked wife is shall we say much healthier i wouldn't say it backfired but there have been two times things went kind of sideways once when my daughter's heart respiratory monitors alarm went off in the middle of the night i jumped out of bed and performed cpr turns out i just forgot to plug the machine in and its low battery alarm was the same as your kid is dying alarm after i got the alarm handled and was checking baby my father from the bedroom doorway asked if everything was okay i said yes it was all good and he shut the door and left i thought it was weird that he was standing outside the doorway looking at the ceiling it wasn't until later when i was finally going back to sleep that i realized i was mostly nude except for a postnatal diaper thing i was unclothed laughed so hard i woke the baby again months later another event happened by this time baby no longer has a monitor and hasn't stopped breathing for months she's healthy enough to co-sleep and i was rocking that bedtime nursing well in the middle of the night i wake up bc there is something biting my nipple turns out baby woke up and decided to help herself to a midnight snack except she didn't get a good latch got frustrated and freaking bit me i tell her that story every chance i get why can't i have an abc well when you were about four months old why can't i go to z's well one time when you were very little i was going to say never because i always keep shorts next to the bed however we got a new papa couple years back who likes to sleep under the blankets i gotta say catching a wear and paw from to the ass or genital region sucks a little bit more than it typically hitting my leg or back not really backfired but room inspection in the barracks they always gave me time to get pants on after that i think of my poor husband on vacation in europe the one time i convinced that man to sleep naked so he can be more comfortable lol we wake up to what we thought was the middle of the night to blaring fire alarms in a hotel in london he rarely sleeps naked so he bolted out of bed assuming he was in boxes grabbed his slippers and ran out the door meanwhile i was getting dressed right behind him trying to get his attention to get dressed he kept thinking i was worried and was yelling over me i managed to get clothes on while he remained naked we ran down four flights off stairs made it to the front desk to ask what the commotion was about only to find out it was 4pm and this was a routine test of the fire alarms throughout the hotel the hotel clerk then looked at my husband and said despite being in europe we have a strict no nudity in the hotel lobby policy i died laughing my husband finally realized he wasn't dressed looked at me and my pajamas and started to grab kleenexes to cover up the whole way up to the hotel room in the elevator he was upset i didn't tell him i couldn't stop laughing so i began to cry we looked like a hot mess getting out of that elevator best vacation story ever this happened to a friend neighbor of mine it was a warm summer night and my friends a couple that lived across the street from me at the time woke up to their phones blowing up from calls and texts from their next-door neighbor the neighbor said it looked like their house was on fire so he got out of bed naked ran to the other side of the house where the massage room she does massage work out of their home has flames crawling up one side of the wall a candle was left on a small wooden shelving unit and the unit caught fire my naked friend picked up the fiery unit and ran it outside to the backyard and hosed it down while the next door neighbors were watching over the fence to make sure it was taken care of his wife was inside pouring water on the flames that had reached the floor and part of the wall all was fine they put it out but the neighbors got a good show if someone sees me naked when i don't plan for them to then that's their own fault if i am in my room it's fair game and i don't have shame or care really other people have penises and vaginas usually one or the other but i am not judging so why does it matter if they see mine just don't stare and we won't have much to talk about lol whoa you made it to the end you're a ducking beast i'll cast you a deal smash like and subscribe for more curated content bruh it's free and that's a great price [Music] so [Music] you

Channel: Sir Reddit

Views: 720,194

Rating: 4.9678311 out of 5

Keywords:

Id: ido0UTPycJE

Length: 19min 7sec (1147 seconds)

Published: Wed Dec 02 2020