My Super RICH EX-Baby DADDY Is Dodging His BABY SUPPORT & His Mother Backs Him Up

radit what's your story on your terrible ex-wife / husband when I was 20 I dated Ryan who was 28 I'll let him know how I felt about babies pro-choice but I don't want one for me and that I was using birth control regularly I became pregnant six months into our relationship after four years of continuous birth control use with zero scares he did not want to use a protection which I do agree was very stupid on my part Ryan wanted no part which I understood all I asked was that he provided child support and whatever way he could he disagreed and eventually I had to go to court over three years he would evade support work under the table or use his wealthy parents to support him I did get a steady stream of support after two years but it was just barely enough I eventually graduated from college while being a mom 24o ver seven and working I was mom and dad for three years and did it on my own financially with the odd support check here and there after that I met my husband Kyle Kyle has been an alive since my son Lucas was three years old Lucas calls him dad and they are very close I've asked Ryan to let Kyle adopt Lucas but he refuses he'll barely even talk to me and he has me blocked everywhere I had to ask through my lawyer and I gave up on it after several knows we've had to learn to be content with Kyle being Lucas's real father in every way but legally the problem is that Ryan found out exactly what Kyle does for a living Kyle is an engineer with a well-known company he's making enough that I can stay home with the kids and pursue other dreams of mine for example I've always wanted to get my master's and with my husband's job I can afford to put my efforts into that without worrying about the expense of childcare because of this Ryan pays me child support as if I was unemployed and he's now at an age where he has to stay at one job for more than a few months he's paying me much more than if I was working it makes him extremely angry to know that we are Lucas and I living quite comfortably before the current situation we to court the judge and our state laws don't take into account what Kyle makes and determined that Ryan would continue to pay the set amount he believes that he should pay nothing and Kyle can support us I agree but he refuses to let my son be adopted if Ryan won't let another man be the legal father of my son then he can continue to fulfill the obligations of a legal father my husband agrees he doesn't think I should just drop the child support obviously Ryan wants me to drop it and his mother has even reached out he and his parents have never even met Lucas and are only contacting me to drop child support does Ryan know child support is no longer his responsibility if he allows my son to be adopted yes he's aware of this also I think I sent a letter to his home explaining how the process would work essentially no more support in exchange for adoption I would like to think he's not a total idiot and could have easily found out this information himself nevertheless I did inform him in basic English what would happen does Ryan's mother know about the adoption have I thought of reaching out to her again I would hope she saw the letter I wrote or is intelligent enough to put two and two together Ryan suffers from type 1 diabetes and was spoiled quite a bit his parents couldn't protect him from child support or taking responsibility I was the evil person who ruined their kid's life and didn't allow him to pursue going to college or whatever he was 28 when this all happened he wasn't going to go to college regardless but Cathy isn't likely to back me here why won't he allow an adoption the main reason is that my son is the only boy in his family his siblings all had girls and Ryan is unlikely to marry or father another child it's this weird legacy thing his family has invented in their heads I couldn't explain it to anyone because I don't even get it myself my son has never met his paternal family and he has my maiden name me and my wife prior to her cheating could have been described as a model couple I guess we had been married for 19 years we were still in love at least that was the impression I had we were still romantic went out on dates physically intimate you name it essentially most of the struggles other long-term couples have after more than a few years of marriage where things our marriage did not suffer from now I work for a large corporation which forces me to travel quite a bit for work which translates in me being gone for about two months out of every year well it turns out my ex used me being gone on business trips as a chance for her to cheat so about a year ago I got home from one of these trips and after being welcomed back home by my family my daughter asks me to speak in private which is where she revealed she found out my wife was cheating on me photographic evidence and everything nothing explicit just a few pictures on her phone of my ex-wife making out with some dude in a coffee shop and she told me she had been suspecting it for quite a while of course I was completely in shock but I chose to confront my wife about it the same night and it devolved into her admitting to everything begging me to stay with her and claims that she did not know what got into her again as the title reveals I decided to file for divorce and that's that story it's a lot longer but I do not feel it's relevant to what I'm asking well my daughter told her brother and they pretty much decided that they want to live with me and want nothing to do with their mother and as a result my wife has been begging me to talk to them about it but I have refused in my eyes I all my kids did nothing wrong here I was not the one who told my kids about it she caused them to find out herself and I happen to think our kids are old enough to decide for themselves whether they want someone like her in their lives or not me talking to them would just be a disingenuous attempt at forcing them to go see her and after the divorce I have no interest in putting that on them it caused more than enough stress of course if they decide they want her in their lives in the future I certainly won't stop them meanwhile my own sister and my ex-wife's family have been badgering me about forcing my kids to go see her as it is cruel and bad for them not to also she could technically sue for partial custody but given the age of our kids that would pretty much be completely in vain i29 female and German I'm married to an Australian for the last five years we have been living in Australia that I have always been very clear about the fact that I would eventually want to move back to Germany especially when it was time to have kids my husband was on board and last year we started looking for jobs in Germany I got one pretty much straight away my husband had some more trouble but eventually he found something - we were set to move in September my parents organised a nice house for us and everything looked great unfortunately due to certain events I have been furloughed and I'm on job seekers my husband is still working luckily we figured since we are moving to Germany soon I could come off birth control will apparently I'm very fertile because I got pregnant pretty much straight away at first we were both overjoyed but then a few days later my husband basically broke down and said he didn't want to leave Australia and he wants his child to grow up here I was absolutely gobsmacked because he never said anything that would have made me think that he wasn't on board with Germany I told him that pretty much from day one I had been very clear about where I eventually wanted to live and that I still felt the same it escalated into a huge fight and eventually we broke up I'm devastated but also feel betrayed in a way this happened seven weeks ago three days ago I arrived in Germany I had to get away since he basically kicked me out of our house and I didn't see why I would look for a place in Australia when I will start my new job in September my ex-husband thinks I should have stayed in Australia since the baby was conceived there he thinks I stole the baby from him and accused me of fleeing the country my ex-wife and I had our daughter very young got married very young and then divorced very young if you couldn't do the math we had our daughter when I was 18 and she was even younger we got married quickly after she gave birth then divorced at 22 and 21 when our daughter was 4 after we got divorced my parents died and I was the sole beneficiary of their wealth this allowed me to get my doctorate without any financial and I now make a very generous salary not to be a brag my ex-wife and her husband are not very well-off financially my ex-wife doesn't have a degree until her husband works a low-level software job they are not struggling for food or shelter or anything like that but they also don't really have much extra for luxuries they have two kids together and her husband has one from a previous marriage I have 50% custody of our daughter we alternate every two weeks I try to be generous with her for Christmas in her birthday but not spoil her I usually keep big gifts behind her challenging but achievable goal for her and if she doesn't achieve it I usually allow for some other way to get it and give her something smaller I also make sure she knows not to brag about what she had and that not everyone is as fortunate as her her birthday came around recently and she's been begging me for expensive wireless earbuds she did very well on her report card and has been practicing the violin diligently without putting up any fuss so I got them for her they were something like two hundred and fifty dollars when she went to her mother's and wore them apparently her step-siblings got incredibly jealous because they wanted them as well especially the oldest from her stepdads previous marriage apparently this has been an issue before that neither my daughter nor my ex-wife told me about I let her take her PlayStation to her mom's house so she has something to do because they don't have one they all share one computer for games which I can see being infuriating for them I was surprised my daughter didn't tell me about it before but she said that she didn't want to bother me about it my ex-wife called this time and said that she either wanted me to stop sending her over with these gifts or to also get them for her kids I'm obviously not going to buy kids I have no relation to an don't parent presence and I don't want to stop sending my daughter over without her headphones or game console since she works hard at school and her extracurricular so deserves to have fun after that and not have to share one computer this has been causing some problems in the past few days because my ex-wife keeps saying that I have to do something I asked if my daughter was bragging and she said she wasn't she's just doing her own thing and her step siblings were annoyed about it I'm not sure what to do since my ex-wife has been causing a ruckus about it but I don't see myself as doing anything wrong here my daughter isn't bragging and is just listening to music and relaxing there's no reason to take away stuff from her so my ex and I divorced when my kids were two and one I admit I wasn't the best dad at first and I went a few months without seeing them which prompted her to take me to court for child support which she gets from me every month now now my ex keeps the kids and I see them when I can I work out of town so sometimes I only see them three days a month but I send her money to care for the kids and I asked her if I could have them on Father's Day since I hadn't seen them since May 15th she brought them over and picked them up Father's Day evening at 6:00 p.m. I guess she had a cookout dinner and presents for her husband I mean completely over the top and we are friends on Facebook and she posted pictures of him holding my kids on their vacation or my daughter lying on his back with her head lying on top of his and my children snuggled up with him on the couch there were a few others of him kissing her belly and a video of him crying as she told him they were expecting a boy she told him that he was doing such a great job helping her raise the kids and that he was the only one she knew who would build tree houses play houses paint a room just to please the kids and watch a Disney movie every night and she loved how much he already loved his son and that they loved him they all loved him even my kids she didn't even tell me happy Father's Day when she came over I texted her and told her she needed to take the post down as I didn't like the pictures of him with my children and that he isn't their father that I am and she needs to realize that she pretty much told me to get lost my mother agrees she needs to take it down my mother then messaged her and she told my mother your son and I divorced over religious reasons he thought he was God and I disagreed and I see he still feels the same way then she blocked her and I the idiot or is my ex I twenty-eight female recently got a divorce from my now ex-husband 29 I was hoping that the process could be done without drama and we could remain friends but he consistently refused to respect boundaries that I had set constant messages begging me to reconsider buying me gifts after I told him that made me uncomfortable etc after several months of this I told him that we could potentially still be friends at a later date but he had to give me some space that didn't change his behavior so the divorce lawyer that I retained sent him a letter telling him to back off and that his actions could constitute harassment we had a couple dogs to split in the divorce lunar and mellough Luna has always been my ex's dog but Neela bonded with me as soon as we got her during the separation my ex left the house that I never refused his requests to come by to see the dogs a couple months into the separation he asked to pick up una for the weekend that wasn't a problem and I arranged it I asked if he would be bringing her back and he told me yes however he did not bring her back or even contact me to tell me that he was not bringing her back to be clear Luna wasn't is my ex's dog and I don't begrudge him the dog at all but after that which was around the same time as the lawyer's letter I told him that I didn't want him at the house and refused to meet him / let him see the other dog when we finally got a separation agreement signed it was agreed that he got Luna and I got nella after the agreement he became more rude and mean in his communications and made threats about breaking into my house to get his things and violence against my new boyfriend the divorce is now final and he has all of his belongings but he is still asking to see my dog because he loves Nala too he has been very insistent and has attempted to guilt-trip me for my refusal I get that he loves and misses the dog but based on his actions during the separation and divorce I don't want to be around him and I don't trust him around my dog I'm 36 15 years ago my girlfriend and I at the time had our son and 80 developed a lot of health issues and died a month after his tenth birthday it changed me her and I broke up I moved out of state got addicted cleaned myself up and went to school on the way I met my now wife who's 29 I'm happy with life again but never does a day go by I don't think about my son and wish he was still with me my wife is due in October and both of us are a bag of nerves mixed with a bunch of other emotions I'd be lying if I said I'm not nervous and extra emotional because this has made me think a lot more about my son I've never told my wife about him she knows I was an addict once she knows about my ex but never once have I mentioned my son I've tried to tell her so many times that I just can't at one point it was so far into our relationship I thought it would risk it if I admitted it I thought she would be angry because I kept it for so long I got her a lot of friends on Facebook from back home who knew about my son after my wife posted something about our future child and tagged me one of these friends brought up my deceased child in the comments I finally admitted the truth and she had a breakdown she left for a hotel I've talked to family and friends about it most agree I did nothing wrong it's just her emotions but some have been honest and can see why she's hurt they think I broke her trust I don't know I need some unbiased opinions here my ex and I split a few years back we had two kids and spirit when they were babies they have always lived with my ex and I see them a few times a month when I'm not working weekends which is frequent I'm remarried and have full custody of my other child I had in a previous relationship my current wife has no children yet but wants to try for one I also just live in a trailer and my wife is pushing me to save for five plus acres and a big home for us my ex-wife got married and moved in with her new husband I was dropping the kids off at her new place and her husband has his own land and only one neighbor and the house was two stories while dropping them off I asked him how much something like this cost and he told me that he built the house by hand paycheck to paycheck and that he's still working on it a little and he plans to build an addition with two more bedrooms living room and a man cave for himself he then snuggled up to my ex and said it's a house now so I'm letting her help me draw out the plans and we just painted the kid's room pink he said everything he owned was now--this he's also set them up with a mini farm with a ton of animals that my daughter loved well seeing how she has this great life now we left and when I got home my wife was annoyed with me over it so I texted my ex and told her I don't think I should have to pay her child support anymore in that so-and-so is more than capable of providing for them and that I needed to save money to start my own family like she has she got angry and told me that they were still my kids and I needed to take responsibility for them still I disagree she doesn't need the money just once it from me [Music]

Channel: ASK GURU

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Keywords: askreddit, r/askreddit, askreddit stories, askreddit women, askwomen, askreddit girls, reddit girls, reddit women, reddit rich, reddit money, reddit ex, reddit break up, reddit divorce, reddit family, reddit family drama

Id: 1wn1bjUSPh0

Length: 18min 46sec (1126 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 01 2020