moving out of my girlfriends basement

well this is it this is my last day living in a basement i'm moving out i've been here for eight months almost nine months i get a lot of comments in my videos talking about taking advice from a guy who lives in his girlfriend's parents basement comments are pretty funny what i wanted to do is just explain to you how this all happened because i think a lot of people think that uh you know i'm not making enough money to be on my own anymore and i should get a real job and you know i just i have no other plans besides just to live in this basement forever and that's not the case so i wanted to give you a rundown of everything that has happened since i've been here and my original plan for doing this so let's wind the clocks back after i took my car back from my dad and effectively cut off my family i wanted out of salt lake city asap i wanted a hard reset i was honestly afraid that my family was going to show up at my door any day and beg me for money or whatever it was and the idea of having to call the police on my own family and have them escorted off my property um was a lot to bear i wanted away from all of the things that have negatively affected me while i lived there like my family was close by all the jobs that i worked at that i hated were close by the ex-girlfriend that cheated was close by like i just wanted away but now that all of that was over i not working as a programmer anymore don't really have a family anymore i decided i had no reason to be there anymore i work remotely on youtube hr lady works remotely both of us were in the city and we both kind of wanted to get away so we tossed around the idea of taking a really really long vacation and you know maybe we're both just stressed out and buy an rv tour the country but we have too much stuff for that we have dogs cars motorcycles stuff that won't fit in an rv we didn't really want to give that up we like the idea of having like a home base hr and i started looking for houses all over the place but here in utah houses are being bought up left and right because interest rates are so low right now it was impossible to find anything pre-built we thought about building a house from scratch but neither of us really wanted to wait for a house to be built from scratch and we figured custom homes being built from scratch would cost like millions of dollars one day we asked hr ladies parents to help us find houses in their area because their area is nice and secluded and kind of everything that i've wanted and we went around and after a full day of looking at houses everything we found had offers pending on those houses or was just completely out of our price range it was at the end of the day and we were kind of all tired from looking at houses and we saw this one new construction site on the side of a mountain from far away and we thought it would be kind of fun to just drive over there and see how much those outrageous houses cost like you know you know you're living on the side of the mountain you're overlooking the entire valley those those houses must be millions of dollars and super expensive so we all drove over there we found the company name they were custom homes and we looked it up and we were getting ready to be like yeah this house cost millions and then we we saw it and it was like this house these houses aren't that much more than the other houses that people are selling that are like 10 years old and that's when we both kind of raised our eyebrows a little bit but we were both in a rush we didn't really want to take that avenue we didn't want to build a house from scratch you know every day that went by i was thinking my parents are going to show up at my door somebody's gonna come to my door they're gonna they're gonna break in my house to steal my stuff like i was no i just didn't i didn't have that kind of time to wait for a house to be built as we were getting ready to go home for the day her mom like jokingly said you know well if you ever wanted to build a house you could always just move in with us hr and i we kind of look at each other we're like hahaha you know thank you so much for the offer that's very kind of you you know i said absolutely not there's there's no way i'm gonna move in to my girlfriend's parents basement no i i've been married i've lived with my ex-wife and her family i've done this whole thing before it didn't end up very good i don't want to be the loser boyfriend in my girlfriend's parents basement like some lowlife you know imagine what my channel would think about that and then hr lady was like yeah you know i don't see myself going back to live with my family not at my age and then we paused after that and we both just kind of looked at each other and we went you know what if we just put our pride aside and we did it i could rent this house out i could save money you could give up your apartment lease you could save money it's a risk of course and then we both kind of just went back and forth on and she was like yeah i don't know and i was like yeah i don't know and then we started to lean more into it so the next day we called up that company and we set a meeting up with the construction company and we came in just to see what they would tell us and what does building a house even look like so after that meeting they were telling us you know this is how much it cost to do this you got to pay the special plot fee you got to have like your earnest money in then you got to pay for the construction deposit and like it just it was we were mediocre about it we sat and thought about it for a few more days and then one morning we woke up and someone went through hr lady's car completely opened up all the doors i think some homeless person slept in her car actually the seat was laid back there was a blanket in there that wasn't hers all of her stuff had been you know gone through um you know why don't you lock your cars josh well if you lock your cars they'll just smash a window in you know and i don't live in a bad area either that's just the life of salt lake city that was her breaking point and that was my breaking point so we called up hr ladies parents and we said yeah you know what we're going to do it we're go we're going to come over and um we're going to we're going to pursue this building a house thing i think when we called our parents were actually kind of surprised we took them up on the offer like i knew they were serious about it but i don't think they thought we would we would flip like that especially just over the course of a few days i definitely didn't want to sell my house in salt lake city it's a good house it's right next to everything you need house values going up so i decided to figure out how to rent my house and turn myself into a landlord and leverage my asset what would that look like what does it cost to do that do i get a property management company what happens if someone doesn't pay rent can i evict them how much can i rent this house even for would that be enough money to pay my mortgage i don't know and while i was figuring that out i was also trying to figure out how i could spruce up my house what do i need to do in here to make this like rentable like it wasn't unlivable or anything i thought it was nice i'm just a simple person you know it's an old house it's from the 1930s it has that kind of 1930s layout inside and that 1930s look so hr lady turned her years of binge watching uh chip and joanna gaines into practical experience we redid the outside of my house i had to do my front yard i pressure washed everything you know just give it some good kind of curb appeal and and man that was a lot more work than i ever thought it was going to be we redid the inside we painted all of the bedrooms we redid my bathroom completely and then when that was done i rented a u-haul unpacked hr ladies apartment into the u-haul and moved it into a storage locker where her stuff has been for the past nine months ten months and i packed up my house and put it into a u-haul and put it in that storage locker and that's where most of my stuff has been for the last nine or ten months and again to be honest like it was a hit to my pride i have the means to go rent a house and live there and do my own thing and be a man instead of being the turbo scent boyfriend in your girlfriend's parents basement now i have the means to rent an airbnb why not just do that i don't want hr to lose respect for me i don't want her parents to lose respect for me you know and i definitely don't want to be resented later and i don't want to be seen as a user it took a lot for me to to do this it really took a lot especially having lived with your parent like your your girl's parents before like it just it took a lot but here we are it just didn't make financial sense to do that when their house is right here and the house we're building isn't too far away so we put the pride aside i ate a large piece of humble pie and it's been great it's actually been pretty fantastic here and i want to tell you guys all about it when i first moved in we didn't really know each other that well i mean i knew them but not like i know them now and we both kind of had preconceived notions about each other nothing bad or nothing major but like for example h.r lady's mom thought that i didn't like to be hugged and i wasn't really a touchy-feely person which is which is pretty opposite of how i actually am um it wasn't until just the other day actually that i explained to her that i don't actually mind giving people hugs i don't mind saying goodbye or hello with a hug it's fine put your arm around me or whatever and then uh sometimes now i'll just go give her a hug to make her day but hr's lady's mom she's she's spicy man she is uh she will crochet the softest blanket you've ever felt with the text that says don't be on the front of it i mean the other day i was editing a video in here and i heard her in the craft room uh in the room behind this one and she was rocking out with dual wielding glue guns pipe cleaners yarn and some uh slipknot the devil and i like it was uh it was interesting hr ladies mom will call you on your [ __ ] tell you to go [ __ ] yourself and then give you a giant hug and she'll say it all with love um she's very straightforward type of person which is yeah she's funny as for hr lady's dad or uh we call him mr big d on the channel i would say without a doubt he is one of the best men that i know hr ladies dad is an air force veteran a firefighter a father friend hr ladies dad is a man of sacrifice a man of honor in my opinion he is the definition of what it means to be a good man i've watched this man go through hell and back just while i've lived here things that i haven't shown on the channel and you'd never even know he was going through it by the smile you see on his face every morning the jokes he makes even when there's real stuff going on there have been some pretty hard times here at this house uh mr big d's mother passed away just a couple months ago i went to that funeral and that was pretty hard also mrs big d hr mr big d's wife her mom passed away charlie's grandma i guess there's so many i wish i could say their names but i went to that funeral as well i've been to two funerals in just the past like three months and they've been particularly emotional for me because of everything that has happened with my family i don't want this sounds messed up but to me they kind of symbolized the death of my family when i was there because that's really i guess that's kind of what it has been feeling like but let me just say i did have the privilege of meeting hr ladies grandmother at thanksgiving this year and christmas this year 85 years old sharp as attack witty as ever r rated jokes middle fingers everywhere and then a and then a fat rip on her vape and she was probably one of the most badass old ladies i've ever seen in addition to that we've had some kind of emergencies with the animals around the house here one of their dogs was rushed to like the vet uh almost passed away my dog the big white fluffy dog his name is oko he tripped off the back deck it's just just a couple feet off the ground he tripped off of it and tore his acl so my dog had to have like major surgery on his knee so i've been doing physical therapy with him around and kind of making sure that he's not doing anything crazy i mean maybe it doesn't seem like a big deal to you guys but like my dogs are my dogs are my life like they've been through everything that i've been through and i treat them you know i treat them just like they were my kids my family tried to reconnect with me here and i would say that week was probably very very difficult week for me i'm sure you can tell that by the four videos in a row that i posted about it and how it affected me and they were there during that phone call listening and i'll never forget those times when you know the resilience of this family never really ceases to amaze me everyone stays in high spirits for the most part for example her dad will come home from a long shift at work with stories about how he found bodies stories about drugs stories about people on the street stories of heroism and this man has some stories stories that will make you laugh your ass off and some stories that will make you want to go hug your mom i'll probably get him to make a channel just so that he can share his 25 years of firefighter experience anytime [ __ ] hits the fan in this family hr ladies dad is unmoved you know it's always the most casual i'll take care of it yeah no big deal or we'll figure it out and when i say unmoved i don't mean that he's an unemotional being you know he hides his feelings or anything like that he'd be the first one to slap you on the back and tell you good work and if you were to help him with something he'd give you a hug and say hey thanks for that you didn't have to do that he'd be the first one to say come on you can do it i believe in you and then if you weren't able to do it he'd say that's all right man you tried your best just keep getting better just the other day um he told me how proud he was of me uh sticking to my diet because i gained weight to gain muscle and now i'm shredding back down and i've lost around 20 pounds so far and it was just out of the blue it's like it was nice to hear but i definitely wasn't expected in a live stream i did a while back when we first moved in people in chat were trying to troll the live stream and kept asking how do you feel about them living in your basement your your daughter's boyfriend and without hesitation on the live stream he said they're family and you always help family now coming from my perspective my first thought about that was uh no you don't don't you know what family does look at what my family did as time has gone on i've realized much like you guys family is who you choose to allow in your life and not blood it was when i realized this that everything clicked and it's been a very strange experience it's like i've had to create an entirely new definition of what that word means what it looks like you know family get-togethers what holidays look like what birthdays look like what day-to-day interactions look like what asking for help looks like what giving support to people looks like i've had to reframe all of this in my mind for example just the other day hr lady showed her parents the last skit that we made with the chief executive intern and they both stopped what they were doing around the house to watch the video and i was like yeah you don't gotta watch it it's cringe it's it's fine like it's real it's weird you know whatever and they watched the skit not once but three different times in a row and uh that's something i've never really experienced before some someone that had a genuine interest in what i was doing and they thought it was hilarious and they went back through and they're like oh i really like this and i really like that and like usually i'll show a video to someone and they just kind of skip through it they're like yeah that's cool dude but like they took a genuine interest in something that i was doing that is completely un unrelated to their hobbies and their enjoyments and you know um and that was i mean i took a picture it was when it was happening i was like this is this is crazy like they know i do youtube and they've seen some of my videos but they don't watch all of them or anything like that they're busy living their own life now i know a lot of people on the channel think that i live here and i just use them and i don't pay any bills and i don't do any i'm just like a low life here but the truth is we help each other with whatever you know i'll buy their groceries whatever they need from home depot if they're doing something you know take them out to dinner buy dinner for everybody you know like we do things for each other but honestly they won't even let me pay anything i asked hr lady's mom what what she wanted for letting us stay here she's like nothing world peace have a good day that's the type of people they are and so the only way that i can give back to them is to surprise them with things for example uh i bought her dad a brand new monitor and a chair when i first moved into this office because this is his office and he's letting me use it to work in right now so this is actually his monitor right there and that red chair is also his and he didn't even realize it when he walked in here he just sat down turned on his computer one day and then literally he did he did this he went some did you did you do this and i was like yeah it's yours man or the one time he had some issues with his with his truck that he uses to tow all of his stuff and i wanted to fix it for him but he wouldn't let me do it so instead what i had is a mechanic sneak over to our house here while he was at work one day and diagnose and fix his truck there's just a whole list of things like that that i try to do for them but i don't want to come on here and be like look at what i do and like look at all this money like i don't want that's not how i am i don't i think he's i think he's out there i don't know i mean i don't know if we're in the chat that'll work this is it thanks for letting me live here and give me your office and stuff absolutely yeah absolutely you bet you don't have to thank us for that man you have to thank us for that thanks hey man okay see you in a bit all right see it it's gonna be dope oh yeah it's the little things like that when he's like all right dude can't wait to see it it's going to be dope i know he actually means it you know it's not just like he got to go by now i have this hunch that most people think that i'm purely a basement dweller i eat sleep breathe taking down corporate and exposing bad ceos now i would agree with you i definitely don't like corporate and i've probably looked at more job applications in companies than 99.9 of unemployed people at this point what do we got to do again because she doesn't look good what are we doing again why are we doing it again same thing all right same thing thanks for letting me live here yeah you bet awesome good thank you thanks man i'm actually just trying to finish this up so i can go start moving all my stuff out of storage move it over to the house um but they have to run some errands and so when they get back they're going to help me but anyways i don't just sit in the basement all day like i do love exploring and i love going outside and being outside especially when being outside involves power sports or extreme sports and uh the great thing about being here and being with them is that they love all those things too now that's not to say they don't like being at home and doing some nerd stuff because hr lady hr ladies dad all three of us will sit down we'll play some wow watch marvel movie nerd out to whatever's on but i mean they all enjoy the same kind of outside activities like we'll pack up the motorcycles and the rv and we'll book it down to the desert for a weekend you know we'll go explore some old native american ruins during the day see the old thousand-year-old writing on the walls [Music] and then we'll sit in the rv at night and we'll watch 90 day fiance with our tethered wi-fi phones that have three bars of 2g you know we'll sit around and crack jokes while our tlc app buffers on the ipad you know they love the history and the lore of the wild west and so do i and i've been in utah for about six years now only now living in my girlfriend's parents basement have i actually experienced these things the majority of that time was spent figuring out what i wanted to do with my life figuring out how to make a living figuring out what to do how to help my parents and i never had really time to go explore and do the things that you live in utah to do you know i've lived in the west but i've never explored it so to speak you know there are things that you hear about you see them in movies and and then when you see them in real life they kind of make you laugh like for example tumbleweeds crossing the road when you're driving like just the other day there was a tumbleweed and it was like mccree's ultimate in overwatch you know that's all i can think when i see the little tumbleweeds going across giant dust storms like you can see in the background of that video it's like in the mummy the wall of sand that comes like you'll see that occasionally it's but on the flip side living here is also like living in a bob ross painting it doesn't seem real sometimes it just seems like a calendar photo everywhere you look and as i've mentioned before another great thing is that we're all animal people we take our animals everywhere and we for all intents and purposes this house is literally like a dog foster home all together with all the family members there are 11 dogs just in this house alone on a day-to-day basis there are seven dogs and the dogs age ranges go from being able to legally vote to all the way down to floppy puppy feet and puppy breath they let me bring my two dogs here no problem no questions asked and that's kind of how it's always been if i want to do something it's always like yeah sure no problem no questions asked if that's what you need if that's what you want now last but not least here let's talk about hr lady because none of this would have happened if i didn't meet hr lady i don't really know where i'd be probably still telling my dad you have one more month left for the last 10 months and she gets a lot of flack for being hr lady you know and she's in hr and everyone doesn't like hr but um as a person she's pretty badass like she's usually down for whatever like for example she didn't know how to ride a motorcycle she always wrote on the back of mine but i wanted her to be able to explore on her own so i got a few more motorcycles and taught her how to ride spent one morning learning how to use the clutch and how to drive around and all that stuff and then later on that day we're riding around in the desert and she i mean for never having ridden before she's doing pretty kick ass i taught her how to one wheel round so we'll ride those around town she did a few paragliding lessons with me and she landed weird one day and hurt her leg and she's never finished but she she was down to fly off a mountain pretty cool and one of her favorite hobbies is that she likes to rock hound i would say she likes to rock hounds so much that if she didn't have a job doing hr she would be like a geologist just breaking open rocks every day and mining different i don't know that's her thing she likes she likes rocks and geodes and exploring and breaking them open and stuff but like i said she's also down to stay at home and chill and just do nerd [ __ ] like sometimes we'll lay on the couch together eat some tacos watch like pay money wubby on twitch or kit boga or some esports and that picture we were watching um valorant and she doesn't really know what's going on but when i explained it to her she's like okay that's cool and like she's she's into it she's not just like can we watch something else like 90 day i mean sometimes she does that but most of the time she's just down for whatever or we'll sit and we'll play some wow and run some dailies you know she's down to play some video games as long as she can play him with me or we'll take turns um playing some single player game we'll play mario kart on the switch whatever you guys just kind of see her in the background of my videos but the majority of my life is her and her family and it has been for the last 10 months and so i feel like it's only fair to share the things that they've done for me out of the goodness of their heart as we both lived here you know we're both adults and as you put any people together in a small space you know they hear our problems and we hear their problems and you know we try to get out of the house whenever we can if people need space and all that stuff but as we've lived here we usually we take a daily trip we would go see our house being built from scratch and you know some some days and just nothing would happen for weeks nothing would get constructed there would be no change and it would just be a pile of dirt or a pile of wood or whatever and we'd go every day sometimes twice a day just get out of the house you know it wasn't actually supposed to take this long i wasn't supposed to be in a basement for eight nine months i was only supposed to be here for like four maximum but anyways sometimes on our way back from the gym in the morning on really calm cool still air mornings we would see hot air balloons floating around the valley and we'd always stop and take some video of it and then we'd look at each other and we just kind of joke and be like you know one day we're going to be able to look out of our our living room window out back across the valley and see these hot air balloons you know and that was when we we had no idea that this was gonna take this long and then just today we went to the house that we just bought and there it was i don't know maybe this is silly maybe this is cringe stupid sappy whatever you want to call it but it was pretty cool so this is it boys i am no longer a basement dweller well i still be in a basement but just at our new house instead of this house hope you have a good friday i'm gonna go move all of my stuff if you got a smile or something out of it maybe click like click subscribe and uh i'll see you guys in a couple days in the new spot [Music] [Music] you

Channel: Joshua Fluke

Views: 154,060

Rating: 4.9513721 out of 5

Keywords: joshua fluke, code bootcamp, javascript, how to code, web development, brand, developer interview, developer jobs, corporate cringe, divorce, story i dont talk about, entrepreneurship, digital brand

Id: n7ww158AM7w

Length: 26min 11sec (1571 seconds)

Published: Fri Mar 19 2021