Without a hint of irony
or shame, Senate GOP leader
Mitch McConnell declared an end to the era of
bipartisanship, even as President Biden
continues to entertain fruitless talks with
Republicans. Oh, and also a GOP congressman suggested the Forest Service
should change the course of the Earth's orbit
to fight climate change. For more on this,
it's time for A Closer Look. ♪♪ One of the many things
the Trump era has revealed about our political culture is that the Republican Party
really has no core ideology aside from its deep hostility
to democracy. They have no core
policy positions or visions for the future. And that's why
they don't spend much time talking about the things
Joe Biden is actually doing. Instead, they whine about
Dr. Seuss or Mr. Potato Head or go on Fox News
and say dumb culture war B.S. like this from an actual
United States senator just a few days ago. -The leadership of the
Democratic Party took a hard left
and kept driving. There are two groups
in charge -- the wokeristas who have contempt
for America and the managerial elite
who have contempt for the American
middle class. I refer to them
as the, um, the vanilla soy, extra-foam
latte crowd. -Hey, Huckleberry Hound,
you know who's buying all the vanilla soy lattes?
It's the middle class. I mean, don't you have
Instagram? Every third picture
is a smiling soccer parent with a seatbelt
over their shoulder, holding up a Starbucks cup with the caption "Live,
laugh, caffeinate." Also, a latte with extra foam
is just a cappuccino. You don't have to be
a coastal elite to know that. Just go to Starbucks,
order a latte with extra foam and wait for an exasperated
barista to say, "So, a cappuccino?" And let's not forget,
this dude used to be a Democrat who endorsed John Kerry in 2004
and went to Oxford. So I don't quite buy it when he
puts on his fake folksy demeanor and talks like he's on
Baton Rouge basic cable, giving out crawdad
recipes. [ Imitating Senator Kennedy ]
"Ooh-ee, they extra tasty if you leave the guts in them." [ Normally ] I'm willing to bet
that accent isn't even real. When he's on TV,
he's all like, [ Imitating Senator Kennedy ]
"Democrats are crazier than a swamp rat snorting bath salts
in a steamboat." [ Normally ] But then as soon
as the cameras are off, he turns to an aide and says, [ British accent] "Right, that's
another advert for the telly done and dusted. Now, switch on
Tottenham versus Man U." [ Normally ]
The point is, this is all Republicans have --
this culture war nonsense. Like when they said
Joe Biden wants to ban hamburgers
as part of the Green New Deal. Republicans want you to think
the Green New Deal is some sort of socialist
plot to destroy America. Meanwhile, a GOP congressman
suggested during a hearing this week that a better way
to fight climate change would be for the Forest Service
and Bureau of Land Management to somehow alter the orbit of
the Earth and the moon. -I understand from what's been
testified to the Forest Service and the BLM, you want very much to work
on the issue of climate change. I was informed
by the past director of NASA that they have found
that the moon's orbit is changing slightly and so is the Earth's orbit
around the sun. We know there's been significant
solar flare activity. And so is there anything that the National Forest Service
or BLM can do to change the course
of the moon's orbit or the Earth's orbit
around the Sun? Obviously, that would have
profound effects on our climate. -I would have to follow up
with you on that one, Mr. Gohmert. -Just to be clear,
that was Congress. What you just saw was from,
like, the actual Congress. It wasn't a 3:00 a.m.
public access show that's supposed to be
about current events, but the only people who call in
want to talk about UFOs. "Alright, tonight's topic
is infrastructure. Steve, you're on the line." "Yeah. I'm curious, do you think
extraterrestrials can drive? And if so, do you think
that explains the traffic on the Verrazzano?
I'll hang up and listen." Now, there's been
some suggestion that Gohmert was being sarcastic as a way to dismiss efforts
to fight climate change, which would be just as dumb. Either way, these people
would rather change Earth's actual orbit than maybe put up some windmills
or drive an electric car. They literally, literally think the world should revolve
around them. I also love the long pause
and the promise to follow up, which she definitely will not,
nor does she have to. I'm pretty sure Gohmert has the
memory of a golden retriever. It's not like he's going to roll
into work on Monday and yell, "Did the tree lady
call back with the moon answer?" "I'm having a lousy day
already. Barista gave me [bleep] for
asking for a latte with extra foam." Her response was the equivalent
of giving someone at a bar a fake number
so they'll leave you alone. "Yeah, no, I'd love
to go out with you. Just give me a call at, uh,
1-877-KARS-4-KIDS. I was really hoping to play
the Kars for Kids jingle there, but I was told that, much like
"You Can't Touch This" by M.C. Hammer,
we can't afford it, which is why we've been trying
to cut down in the number of lines we give Wally, because every time he speaks,
we have to pay him per word. -But --
-Shut it, Wally. Every word you say
is one less word we could afford
from this genius. And last time I checked,
well, it's Hammertime, not Yammertime. There are really times
when you miss the audience. What's that?
It would have been the same? Also, the best part
about that clip is there is no way --
no way you could have predicted where it was going from
where it started. It's like getting cornered
at a cocktail party by a guy who wants to talk
to you about life insurance and you think,
"Alright, this is boring." So you zone out for 30 seconds
and suddenly you hear the phrase "zombie
flesh-eating space cicadas." Which, side note -- oh, and
can a tangent have a side note? Can you check with Legal on that
and get back to me? Anyway, side note,
as soon as Broadway reopens, do buy your tickets
for my new musical, "Ci-cay-da Ci-cah-da",
starring Christine Baranski, Harvey Fierstein
and Nathan Lane. And we are also thrilled
to announce that Jason Sudeikis is joining the cast
as Jason Cicadis. Fresh off his monster success
starring in Ted Grasso. [ Crickets chirping ] That's not a response.
That's the theme song. Between "Cicada Cicada"
and "My Zipper", plus my new show, "Chicago
Postal Service Police Force", I will have enough money
to afford an entire line from "You Can't Touch This". -Seth --
-Wally! M.C. stands
for Master of Ceremonies, not Master of Cue Cards. That's why there's
only the one C. Every word you say
is one less lyric we can afford from this genius. Anyway, where was I? Oh, politics.
Alright. So that's the Republican Party
we're dealing with, and Democrats need to be
clear-eyed about that fact. It's a party whose members
believe the Forest Service has the power
to alter the Earth's orbit, the wildfires are caused
by secret Jewish space lasers, and that the election was
hacked by Italian satellites. What's their obsession
with space? Did they all watch the first
episode of "Loki" last night and think it was
a documentary? Side note -- and did legal get
back to us? So we can --
can't take a side note? Let's just do it anyway. Side note, I'm really hoping
that "Loki" is not a big hit, not because I didn't enjoy it,
which I did, but because I'm really hoping
Owen Wilson's not too tied up for the "Wedding Crashers"
sequel that we heard "Late Night" are claiming
full credit for. I mean, if by some chance,
"Loki" takes Wilson away from the project,
then, you know, Vince is going to have to make
a phone call, and I don't know, I think it
might sound something like this. [ Imitating Vince Vaughn ]
"Buddy, buddy, buddy, you know, I love Loki. You know,
he's an imp, he's a trickster. His antics are adorable,
but we have to make this movie. The world is waiting for us." [ Imitating Owen Wilson ]
"I don't know, man. I think Marvel might be
a little more popular." Anyway, what was I saying?
Oh, right. Republicans are too concerned
about culture stuff. Oh. This is why it's absurd
to contemplate bipartisan cooperation
with the Republican Party, and yet, for some reason,
Joe Biden and certain members of the Democratic Party
like Joe Manchin still seem obsessed with it.
This week, for example, Biden ended
bipartisan negotiations with one group of Republicans
only to start negotiations with another group
of Republicans. -Tonight,
infrastructure negotiations entering a new phase,
with President Biden ending talks with a group
of Republicans led by
Senator Shelley Moore Capito on Tuesday and reaching out to
members of a bipartisan group of moderate senators. -I'm sorry, which group
of Republicans do you think you're going
to find common ground with? The group that thinks
the Forest Service has the power to alter Earth's orbit
or the group that thinks the election was hacked
by Italian satellites? [ Imitating Biden ] "Alright,
folks, how about a compromise? How about instead
of the Forest Service, we use the Italian satellites
to alter the Earth's orbit? Do we have a deal?" Also, there's a downside
to humoring Republicans, and that's time. Every day
wasted on bipartisan talks that will inevitably
go nowhere is a day that could have
been spent working on or passing
much-needed legislation on everything from
climate change to voting rights. That's Mitch McConnell's goal
to run out the clock. Did we learn that lesson
from the Obama era? He spent months making
good-faith efforts to woo Republicans. He went to a House
GOP conference to take questions and hosted a summit with them.
In the end, all he got out of it was zero votes
from Senate Republicans for his health care bill
and an annoying, pompous lecture
from Paul Ryan. -This bill does not
reduce deficits. Instead, this bill adds
a new health care entitlement at a time
when we have no idea how to pay for the entitlements
we already have. First, a little bit about CBO. I work with them
every single day. Very good people,
great professionals. They do their jobs well, but their job is to score
what is placed in front of them. And what has been placed
in front of them is a bill
that is full of gimmicks and smoke and mirrors. And what
do I mean when I say that? -Man, look at Obama's face.
That's the moment right then when he started thinking
about his Netflix deal. [ Imitating Obama ] "Maybe I can
get a part in 'Loki'. Uh, Loki! Stop with your antics.
It's time to get serious." [ Normally ]
Oh, sir. That's Disney+. "But he's Loki. Can't you trick
him into moving to Netflix?" See guys, two "Loki" references,
in one Look. It was pretty good. I wonder if there's
going to be a third one. Shoemaker? Do you think we'll do
rule of threes on "Loki"? You're useless. Our material
is getting fresher. Next we'll be talking about
cryptocurrencies and Dogecoin, or as Sean Hannity
called it last night... -OK, you've been
hearing all about it. Bitcoin, cryptocurrency.
What is it? Why is it so big? What is Bitcoin?
What is block chain? What is DoggyCoin? -Well, apparently you haven't
been hearing all about it. "DoggyCoin"
is what my kids call it when Frisbee leaves a turd
on the carpet. Anyway, what were we talking
about? Oh right, the news. Senate Republicans couldn't
even produce 10 measly votes for a commission to investigate
the January 6th insurrection, and this week, they blocked
the Paycheck Fairness Act. They're never going to agree
to a deal on, say, infrastructure,
especially when their members like Tennessee Senator
Marsha Blackburn are going on Fox News
and saying stuff like this. -If they want great
infrastructure right now, ready-to-build, go build
the wall on the southern border. -A wall in the middle
of the desert is not infrastructure.
No one can use it, drive over it, or through it
unless you paint a tunnel on it, and even then, it's only
applicable to roadrunners. Also, I thought Trump
already built the wall. He kept insisting the wall
was being built. So which is it? Did he build it or did he flake
on a core campaign promise? Or are you guys calling
for more walls? "We need a second wall
to protect the first wall because it is flimsy
and shoddily made. And the best part is
we don't have to pay for it. We can just use..."
-DoggyCoin. -The meaningless pursuit
of bipartisanship that will never happen is wasting
valuable time and energy that could go to far
more productive things. In fact, McConnell
has already declared that his #1 goal
is blocking the Biden agenda. And earlier this week,
without even a hint of self-awareness,
he said this. -As you look to what
the majority leader has in mind for June, it's pretty clear the era
of bipartisanship is over. -Oh, man.
I wonder whose fault that is. If this had been the case the Mare of Easttown
was investigating, she would have solved it
in the first five minutes and spent the next six episodes
trying to figure out why all the kids in town
looked like they came from L.A.. "I don't know, Mare.
Their teeth are real good." Republicans have no interest
in making government work, only in controlling it. That's why they're laser-focused
on subverting democracy, spreading the big lie that
the 2020 election was stolen, posing for photos at the
Minnesota violent insurrection to overturn the results, and
passing voter suppression laws so they can never lose again. They think they're beyond
democratic accountability, no matter how unpopular
they are. Basically,
when it comes to voters, their attitude,
much like M.C. Hammer, is -- -You can't. -This is on you, Wally. -I'm sorry, Seth. I try to stop,
but I just can't. -Why? -Because I'm "2 Legit 2 Quit". [ Crickets chirping ] [ Laughs ] -Good one.
-Yeah. I felt pretty good about it. Anyway, what was I doing? Oh, right, I was trying
to end the segment. Basically, when it comes
to bipartisanship, even basic democracy, the Republican position
is.. -I'd never do it again. This has been A Closer "Loki". ♪♪ God's Love We Deliver cooks
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