- Would you meme? medical edition. Number 21 let's get started. Pee woop! Me, I'm still tired from all
the CrossFit this morning. My coworker, it's pronounced croissant. And you ate four of them. I wonder. Is it, is it croissant or croissant? What do you think of my French accent? Croissant. Parle vou francais? Best pick line ever. Dang girl you are my appendix because I don't understand
how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me
want to take you out. (Laughs) This is so weird. I'm gonna rewrite it. Dang girl. You are my appendix. While most people want to get rid of you because they think you're unworthy. I'm gonna keep you because
I've never had an appendectomy. Hmm! Are you taking me to the hospital? No. Ma'am you need top medical experts. We're taking you to the college section. I wish they said we're taking
you to like the meta offices. Cause I feel like that's
where the best medical information is these days. Doctor, do you exercise? Me, oh yeah, I do. All of them. The push offs, plonks. Doctor. Me, cronchies. Doctor, I'm gonna put no. Me, okay. You know, it's funny. I hosted a class where doctors exercise with their patients and
then I was like, okay we're gonna do lunges, lunge, lunge. And then I saw some people
were getting hungry. So I was like, not lunch, lunge. That joke. Head cold, sore throat. Anything else? Yes. I'm a little horse. Aw. You know, it's funny. I wasn't gonna laugh at it
cause it's really cheesy. But the horse is adorable. Exercise gives you energy, but
you need energy to exercise. Sounds like a pyramid scheme to me. you know what's a bigger pyramid scheme? You want to be motivated? Do something first. Then you get the motivation. You're supposed to be
motivated to do the action but in order to get the motivation you need to do the action first. That's the Ponzi scheme. No cure for heartbreak. Can't stop thinking about (Laughs) Plus diarrhea. Did she leave because of the diarrhea? Cause that'll be messed up. I too dabble in essential
oils, essential oils. I, I, I hit home pretty
hard on the trans fats. Those are oils I can't get behind. Stethoscope was invented in 1816. Doctors before that. Doctors before that actually use like one of these like triangular cone
looking things to listen. What's the wildest thing
you ever did for money. Is that school or squid games? I can't even tell. You don't need a
parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute
to go skydiving twice. Cause the first time, I don't get it. - Do you need a parachute
to jump out of an airplane? - No. Well, yes. - Do you need one to jump out? - Oh cause you, it, yeah. To me need is equatable with life. So without life you can't need. Misinformation, that's
some good news for you. When you say vasovagal syncope instead of homey pooped so hard he passed out. How about this? Neuro cardiogenic syncope. That's like the next level
of vasovagal syncope. It's what happens when
your body doesn't react with its neurologic cardiologic system fast enough to compress your
arteries inside your legs to increase the blood pressure to supply more blood to
the brain when you poop. So take it easy when you poop. Falling off a roof when you're a kid. I don't know why they're saying this because that could be lethal. Sneezing too hard when
you're adult, low back pain! As an adult, if you don't
warm up properly for a cough or a sneeze ,it's
possible to herniate a disc. Eating five servings of
fruit and vegetables a day is part of a healthy diet. Don't eat too many carbohydrates
and limit sugar intake. Okay, I'm gonna explain the SpongeBob meme cuz it warrants medical intervention by a board certified
family medicine physician. When we say eat five servings of fruit we're saying eat the fruit
that is within the sugar that is co-packaged with,
by nature with fiber thereby decreasing the
absorption and the speed of absorption of that sugar. Plus nature was like, we're
gonna load it with vitamins and minerals so that you're
not just getting sugar but you're also healing your
body and making it stronger. Versus when you eat a lot of refined carbohydrates, white bread, white pastas you're not getting the
nutrients, you're not getting the fiber. You see the difference? Thanks SpongeBob. Yoga master, Jagermeister. Facts. By the way, you know there's a condition called
Saturday Night Palsy where if you fall asleep, drunk on a bench and you fall asleep on the
benches in here, it actually like damages the nerve here
and you loose sensation and and sometimes motor function of that hand. If you're laughing at these memes you're gonna be laughing at my show. I'm going on tour Philly,
DC, New Jersey, and Boston. Click down below to get
your tickets now they're selling out quick. ACU pasta. I don't know. I would just want noodles like
wet noodles all over my body. Me when I wake up in the morning, ripped. Me after I have sip of water. This is what it's like training for boxing and I'll explain why. I drink 64 ounces of water when I box with electrolyte tablets in them. So you make sure to hold onto that water. And I don't know why my stomach just goes. How bad is your eyesight? Oh my God. Lately, my eyesight's gotten worse. And I can't tell if it's because I'm spending
more time on my iPhone. And I'm just like this all the time. Or is it because I'm
actively getting punched in the head training for a boxing match. Girls, I wonder why we
usually live longer than boys. Boys, top 10 organs to
sell to buy gaming PC. Can't live without all your organs. You need your organs. In fact, I'm gonna make
a video of organs that you can live without. Name one right now quick. Appendix? No, lung. Big score, found a ton of
cotton candy hiding in my attic. Oh, don't eat that. That will like shred your insides. God can we report this video? Doctor waiting room. If you die, whilst
waiting to see the doctor please cancel your appointment. That should be sign actually for the staff that is
making the appointments that if you see a patient die,
cancel their appointment. What exercise to improve
on this condition? Oh, is that a bathroom suction? That is Pectus Excavatum
genetic condition can actually cause abnormalities of the heart but a lot of people
live very normal lives. I've actually seen a
patient who had a heart outside of her chest. It it's a known chest deformity. I believe detox teas
are pee woop am pro-vax and will never vape, but real Dr. Mike will never convince me to
not put Q-tips in my ears. I have very little joy in my life. Don't take this away from me. Butt space hole? What's butt space? - I have no idea what that means. (Beep) - Like I care about
your tympanic membrane. What other person in
your life has ever came up to you Ms. C, and told you that they care
about your tympanic membrane? I bet that's never happened before. Eating is crazy. You put food in a cavity where
you smash it with 32 bones then a meat tentacle pushes
it down a pool of acid. How about the fact that you take a sword and you slice a piece of cow and then jam it into your mouth? Like we have mini swords in our homes. Having your nipples pierces a good idea until you think about the
fact that if you ever die you need to be shocked by defibrillator, the chances of your nipples
frying off are pretty high. You're welcome. You know, what's funny. I've shocked a lot of
people with defibrillators. I don't know if any of
them ever had nipple rings and I wasn't trying to save their lives. I was trying to bring them back to life. It's important distinction
in ACLS protocol. When you zone out in
class for two seconds. two plus two equals four rain, whoa! It's medical fun fact time. Have you ever heard of an absence seizure? It's a type of seizure where you actually like become absent for a period of time, and then we put them on an EEG for 24 hours that monitors
their waves of their brain. And we can actually catch
these Absence seizures. And the fact that we call them Absence as opposed to absent
seizures was bewildering to me from day one. Normal heartbeat. Deceased heartbeat. When your leg hair moves and it feels like there's something crawling on your leg. When you're jogging and you wear like those
Nike tight or whatever tight spandex pants and the
little hairs on your leg like form into like a little knot, and then you take a step and
you feel those hairs rip. I honestly feel like that's
worse than the torture that you get when people put paper cuts in between the webbings of your fingers. People, makes medical memes and jokes. Dr. Mike, getting ready to explain. That's how I have fun. What do you think doctors do at parties? We just like give medical
advice and make meme jokes. Improved pain, scale. One, it might be an itch. Two, I just need a bandaid. Three, it's kind of annoying. Four, this is concerning
but I can still work. Five, bees? Six, lots of bees. Seven, I can't stop crying. Eight, I can't move it hurts so bad. Nine, mauled by a bear or ninjas. Ten, unconscious. This is an improved pain scale but it leaves out individuals
who don't speak the language. I prefer the one with the faces. Have you ever seen the one with the faces? I flew a legit F 16. Click here to check that out. As always stay happy and healthy. Fighter jet. You know the one with the missiles? Well they took away the missiles. click here. (Funky Music)
