- A word of warning: these
thirst tweets are hilarious, so buckle up. But also buckle up
because I'm going on tour. Prepare for laughs, fun,
and an amazing night out. Deets below at DoctorMikeLive.com. Let's get started. Peewoop! Nina: Wow, Do you like sleeping? Me too. We should do it together. That's pretty good. Do you
think that's a pick up line? - They just went for it. - Nina comes in with the second one. You're so hot, even my
pants are falling for you. - I just have some
follow up questions Nina. Are they falling off the hanger? Are they? - Clean Pam. - Are they, are they clean pants? - No, clean Pam. You're being clean Pam. (Pamela laughing) - Dr. Mike can give me a big,
long, hard, strong, and heavy hug at any time. - It was supposed to be thirsty, but then it turned out to be platonic. - Just really sweet. Just really kind and loving. - Hey doc, I came in to discuss
some preventive health care, but every time you walk in here I get premature ventricular contractions. Want to test the strength
of my heart over dinner. - I like that one, because
I learned something. - What did you learn? - That premature ventricular contractions are things about a heart. - That's true. They are. They're part of your
electrical cardiac rhythm. - Would you be the C to
my G? Or the A to my T? I don't get it. - C to my G? - Sam. We need a lifeline. - [Sam] Aren't those
like the genetic code. - Oh my God. - [Sam] That's my high school
biology coming through. - Wow. - [Sam] Like Gattaca, the
movie Gattaca with Jude Law, has like, you know, the
sequencing, gene sequencing. - Why does he know that? - I'm sorry, but he
just got so much hotter. And I want you both to
switch places right now. Oh my God. - How did you know that? - I am actually turned on. - Wow. She wants me to be her DNA. - [Sam] Yeah. - We could be DNA together. She wants a child is what she's saying. Read them, read them to my face. I want uncomfortable eye contact. - This one's no words. So I'm
going to act it out for you. (Pam throwing up) I think that's what that is. - What? - Dr. Mike can write and
fill my script for vitamin D. (Pam Laughing) - Little did you know you
don't need a prescription for vitamin D. It's over the counter. - That's just over the counter. You can get that vitamin D over
the counter my friend Laney. - Or just a little bit of sun time. - Dr. Mike, I've been diagnosed
with the lack of serotonin, dopamine and, what's that word Mike? - Oxytocin. - And oxytocin. But I believe
I saw you with a package that may just maintain my long term cure. - But why? Why are they low
on all the neuro transmitters. - You should also see a doctor. (Mike laughing) - Doc, do you do virtual
chest compressions? 'Cuz I feel my heart beating
faster when I watch you. - It's like you haven't learned anything watching my channel. You don't do chest compressions (Pam laughing) when someones heart is beating. It's only when homeones, (Mike gaging) someone's heart has stopped. - Home. Hokay. Hokay. Hokay. Roses are red. Violets are
blue. You make my heart skip. I think I have Mobitz type two. - Oh, they definitely used that before, because that's too good. Mobitz type two is a heart block. It's funnier when I know. - It's a second degree heart block. - Place I would love to be right now. At the beach sipping a fresh
drink or on Dr. Mike's lap. Yeah, that sounds as a better idea. - Do I sound like Santa Claus? - Dr. Mike could break
my ribs while giving me chest compressions and
I honestly think him. - Yes. If you do chest compressions and you break someone ribs. They should thank you. That means you're doing them
right and you're saving lives. - I'd love to get my
flu shots with Dr. Mike and get a lollipop after. But now that I'm older can I get. (Pam gagging) (Pam laughing) - I give stickers? I don't give lollipops. - That was shocking. That was so shocking. - Was there an emoji or a word? - It was a word. - A letter or word?
Full word? Spelled out? - Wait a minute. - But now that I'm older
can I get the skin flavored lollipop please. (Pam and Mike Laughing) - [Pam] It was so shocking. - Of course its Sarah that writes that. - [Pam] It was so shocking.
It was so shocking. I don't know a word in this one. - Polydipsia. Means you're thirsty. - Do I have polydipsia or am
I just looking at real Dr. Mike too often. - That's good. - I like that. - You got to get checked
for diabetes though. (Sam laughing) Polyuria or polydipsia?
You know what polyuria is. - Is that where you pee a lot? - Yeah. - I'm basically a doctor. Okay. Dr. Mike makes me miss
the days when the flu shot were applied with the pants down. - Oh no. - I don't need the flu shot, but I have no objection
against the pants down part. - [Sam] Did they use to give
flu shots with your pants down? - I don't know - I always pull my pants down
when I'm getting a flu shot. I just hope you find your forever. Find the person who makes you whole. P.S. make lots of those gorgeous babies. - I want to. - I hope all of Mike's babies
come out looking like me. I would legit let Dr.
Mike take all of my organs and lie on the operating
table and say, thank you. - What? - I have so many questions. Dr. Mike could punch me or step on me and I'd still thank him. All of these people are
like, you can do whatever. And I'd still say, please, and thank you. - But why. - Dr. Mike could hit me with his car and drag me to the clinic
just to do compressions and I would thank him. Also. I got my flu shot, but I could always use another injection. This one's just a question. And it's who gets more
attention from the ladies? Dr. Mike or the Bear pup? The bear pup. - The Bear pup. By far
by far, even on dates. It's like, where's bear. I'm like, hi. Hi. - I've been sick and throwing up lately. So I decided to take a pregnancy test and it came out positive, but I'm pretty sure my
parents are going to be mad. But knowing that Dr. Mike is the father makes me feel a lot better. - Oh my God. That is
the creepiest thing ever - I read it in a creepy voice
which I don't think helped. Wishing I could trade places
with one of Dr. Mike's shirts for a day. Them arms though. - That's cute. You okay there cow, cowg, - Did you see. Feel it. Feel it. - No. Did you hear it? - Why it cracked? - Yeah. - Yeah. - What is that sound? - Just cracked. It was my
arm. It was like up here. - No, it was down there. - It was definitely not. It might have been my elbow. - It was in the auricular area. - So it was my vagina? - That's not what that is Pam. - I want to be the myelin
sheath to your axon. - She wants to cuddle me. - How can someone
schedule a prostate exam? Asking for a friend. That's a butt hole right? - Yes. (Mike laughing) I mean the prostate not a butt hole but in order to do it we
have to go through the anus. - Bears had a few moms, but
I'm trying to be as last. Lock it down. - And a few? He didn't have a few moms. He had a couple moms. - A couple and a few
are the same thing Mike. - No they're not. (Sam laughing) - [Sam] You triggered him with that one. [Pam Laughing] - I'm pretty sure my ideal
weight is Dr. Mike on top of me. - That's cute. I like that one. (Mike clapping) - Amy, you're in the lead. I'm thirsty, which means I'm dehydrated. So I need to grab a glass of water. Oh, you met that kind of thirst. (Mike laughing) I like that one. It's innocent. To be honest, I feel like
Dr. Mike would be sweet and kind as a partner and I
just crave that, you know? - I need that to. Not even gonna lie. - I see you in my dreams. I like that one. That's cute. Are you my heart? I'm
ready to take a beating. (Mike laughing) - I like it. - I do too. What? Ooh, what, what this one? What? Seriously, I would like
to test the strength of my reusable straw on you. Do you get it? - [Sam] Where would the straw go? (Pam laughing) - Oh. No I, I still don't get it. I thought maybe she was saying
I'm a tall glass of water. - How do I get Dr. Mike to
crush me with this thighs, with the same tenacity he
crushes misinformation with? Asking for a friend. I love that one Emily. - Emily. I would never
crush you with my thighs. - But he does crush misinformation. - But I do crush misinformation. - Which I love. I'm learning how to hit on
you. Based off of these tweets. - No you don't.
- Yeah, a hundred percent. I feel pretty confident
in my abilities right now. - You, you, no, okay go.
- Yeah. - Oh, Hey. I was going
to grab one of those, but if you need it, that's cool. - Oh, I actually did
need a, this cucumber, but if you want it, you can have it. - Thanks. - You're welcome. - Where are you from? - Literally two blocks from here. - No way. What do you,
what do you do there? - I'm an actuary. - Actuary. Okay. So you deal
with like numbers and stuff? - Actually, I still don't know. But I tell men that because I'm a comedian and I didn't want to have
to tell you the truth. - Oh, because I was going
to give you a math problem. - I didn't think you were going to ask me a follow-up question. - Just one plus one equals what? - Not a clue. Two
- Two - Oh - Cucumber. ( Pam and Mike laughing) If you want to get to know Pam better click here for her story point with me, or if you want to get to know
me better, my personality, check me out taking a personality test. Which one's better? - Honestly. I'm curious
about how this turns out. - Exactly. Click it. And as always stay happy
and healthy and thirsty - and fabulous. - and fabulous.
