-Welcome back, John.
It's always great to see you. You look great, bud.
-It's nice to be here, thanks. -Yeah, it is Nana Week. We're talking about
nanas and highlighting -- spotlighting grandmothers.
-Congratulations. -Yeah, thank you.
[ Laughter ] Do you have any memories
of your grandma? -You're presuming they're dead. [ Laughter ] -Is she alive? I'm so sorry. -No, she is dead.
-Okay. [ Laughter ] I shouldn't have asked that,
I'm so sorry. -It's just the idea you went
leaning in so hard with "Any memories?"
[ Laughter ] -That's not what I meant -- -It was supposed to be
a high-risk strategy, but you stuck the landing.
She died. -Okay, no, I didn't --
Yeah, I'm sorry. -A while ago.
And I do -- Yes, she was great. She was from Liverpool, which is
where all my family is from. And she loved comedy. And right towards the end, she got into a bit of
a scuffle with -- in her old people's home.
-No. -Yeah, she walked around
in a nighty a lot, all day, which, you know,
that's her right. [ Laughter ] Nighty, does that make sense?
Nighty? -Yeah.
-Does that sound too Dickensian? -No, a nighty. Yeah, sure. -Yeah, she walked around
in a nighty. And there was a woman
who lived opposite her who took exception to this. So she kind of came at her one
day, waggling a walking stick. She grabbed the stick, pulled it
towards her and then kind of -- honestly, kind of Will Smithed
an open-hand slap. [ Cheers and laughter ] Yeah. The crazy thing is
Lupita Nyong'o was there going, "Oh, [bleep]"
[ Laughter ] She did. She did. There was definitely
a conversation about what -- "What do we do here?" To which we -- Our thought was,
"You're allowed one." [ Laughter ]
-Yeah. -There was a -- She loved
the fact I did comedy and there was a famous comedian
in Liverpool called Ken Dodd, who you won't have heard of. He was a very odd man who -- There's no way to explain this
in a concise way. He used feather dusters
for his act. That's all --
Google it or don't. [ Laughter ]
-No, no, no. As part of his act,
he had two feather dusters? -Yeah, that's right.
He used them to tell jokes. Anyway, the point is,
he was famously a tinker. Like, he used to spell pots
and pans as a young man. And he would talk about it a lot
on stage. And he was -- he was a tinker
where my nan grew up. And she said, "Oh, you're
a comedian now like Doddy. That's great. You know what? He knocked on my door one day
and said, 'Barb, you know,
if you buy this pan, you'll never need to buy
another one.'" And she said, "You know what?" And she reached under her bed
and said, "I never did." And she brought out a pan that
really should have been thrown away about 55 years
previously. [ Laughter ] You can see lead paint
just flaking off it. Ken Dodd poisoned her
and my family. -Oh, my God. That's the whole point of
this story, yeah. -He's dead as well.
-No, sorry, yeah. [ Laughter ] -Just as long as we're listing
dead British people. -I want to ask, how are the --
How are the cute kids? -They're alright. Yeah.
-They're good? -They're great, yeah.
-They're what, six and three? -Six and three now, yeah. The 3-year-old has got really
into the Red Hot Chili Peppers. [ Laughter ]
I wasn't expecting it either. But he heard "Under the Bridge"
once and has become obsessed with it. It's the only thing
he wants to be played, it's the only thing he wants
to be sung to him at night, and "Under the Bridge"
in particular. -"Under the Bridge"?
-"Under the Bridge." You haven't heard
"Under the Bridge" until you've heard a 3-year-old gaze sorrowfully into
the mid-distance and said -- ♪ Sometimes I feel like
I don't have a partner ♪ [ Laughter ]
Yeah, exactly. ♪ Feel like my only fwend ♪ With a W. Yeah.
[ Laughter ] -Oh, my God.
-And can you imagine a 3-year-old --
"I don't ever want to feel like I did that day"? What the [bleep] do you know
about pain? [ Laughter ]
At 3 years old. I'll tell you about pain. Like you did what day? What day is such a bad memory
for you? [ Laughter ] You're fine! [ Laughter ] He loves it. I was singing it
to him last night. He was like,
"Sing 'I don't want to feel.'" Basically, "Under the Bridge"
is his "Baby Shark." -Oh, I love that kid.
[ Laughter ] "Last Week Tonight," you're back
into the studio, bud. -Yes. We're back now, yeah. -Congrats.
-Thank you. -The show is fantastic
as always. But now you're back
in the studio. And our pal Drew Barrymore is
your neighbor. -Yes. I met her -- I met her
when I was having one of my first nasal swabs
early on in the pandemic. -You never forget your first. [ Laughter ] -Back when --
Kids don't understand. They used to go real deep. [ Laughter ] Not this kind of nose tickle
you're having now. [ Laughter ] Anyway, she was -- you know,
she had a mask and a hat on. -Yeah.
-And she started yelling at me. And it took me like a few
seconds to realize who she was. Her show was just starting. And she was saying --
-You didn't know it was Drew? -I gradually realized
it was her. And then she was saying,
"I love late-night comedy." And she said she been on
"The Johnny Carson Show." And it was all happening
so fast. I'm went, "How on Earth were you
on the Johnny Carson show?" She looked at me and she said,
"I was in [bleep] 'E.T.'" [ Laughter ] If I had known as a child that
Elliott's sister would one day come out of that screen
and yell at me, "I was in [bleep] 'E.T.,'" I'd have been -- I would look
forward to every day between then and that point.
-And now, yeah. -It was the first film
I ever saw. -I loved "E.T."
-It was -- I was carried -- The visceral memory I have is
being carried, screaming tears,
as the credits were rolling because I couldn't believe
he left, that E.T. left and that Elliott
didn't go with him. That was the thing that
really broke my heart. -You thought Elliott
was going to go on -- -Of course! [ Laughter ] What's he staying for?
His family? [ Laughter ]
-Yes, yes. -An alien you just made a key
connection with is leaving, invites you to come. And you stayed? Like, if we don't --
Even at that age, I understood the fundamental
lore of rom-coms, if you can call "E.T." that,
which I'm not sure you can. -No.
-Is you get on the plane at the end. [ Laughter ] -You're running --
Yes, you run after the thing -- -Go to him.
-Go to him, yeah. -Go to him.
So yeah, I thought it was awful. That little rainbow felt
sarcastic as it takes off. I hope there's a director's cut
somewhere where Elliott tells his family
and says, "Peace." -Yeah, and goes to
space with E.T. -You know what I was going to
say to you, by the way, last time you were on the show,
and I talked to you. I said -- I was talking about --
I don't know how I got into it. About meeting a dog.
-Oh, my God. Oh, my -- That is -- Honestly,
you know, during the pandemic, it was hard to sometimes get
the laughter that you wanted and needed in that moment. That sentence that you stumbled
over gave me something from deep, deep down. [ Laughter ]
-I made you laugh -- -He was passing -- We were just having
conversation. And he said,
like it was nothing, "Oh, I once met a famous dog
backstage at a Kevin Hart concert." And I remember thinking,
"Stop talking now and unpack each ingredient
that you've presented there. Don't skim on like it's nothing when what you presented
is a vignette to me." -Yeah, you met a dog
at backstage -- -You met a famous dog.
Not "a" dog. A "famous" dog. -Backstage at a Kevin --
-Backstage -- you did a meet-and-greet with
a famous dog backstage at a Kevin Hart concert. All of those ingredients
separately are good. Together,
that is a "Chopped" episode that should make the final. [ Laughter ] -Well, it really happened. And we tracked down
footage of this. This is real. Here I am meeting
a dog named Jiffpom backstage at a Kevin Hart show. We'll figure it out, right?
I'll call you tomorrow. And we're hanging out. I'll call you tomorrow.
It's good. -Look at that.
[ Applause ] Wow, huh?
-Wow. -One of the things in that room
is looking at the other thinking,
"What are you doing here?" And it's -- it's not you, Jimmy. [ Laughter ] -John Oliver, everybody. "Last Week Tonight
with John Oliver" airs Sundays at 11:00 p.m.
on HBO.
