It's "Okay" To Poison The Kids In Job Simulator VR

ah the flowers they bloom with the smell of success my friend our new restaurant shall be a success and if it is not i'll drown you in the fish tank [Laughter] now first of all before we do anything let's wash our hands might i trouble you for some tea and crumpets that's a very unrealistic stereotype and i'm offended by it have some meat to hold you over oh he felt nothing he's dead inside clearly this tea business is very important isn't it get the water in there a little bit of soap like most beverages tea is best optimized for consumption by being placed in a cup i've just put the tea bag straight in there you would have never made tea before i have i know how to make tea although also require heat all the little handle pushy bit is bread shaped oh that's lovely isn't it that's very nice yep that looks good to me i'm gonna make you a crumpet cookie sandwich there we go with a little bit of salt a little bit of pepper a whole lot of love shouldn't shake my hips when i'm saying that [Music] ding ding ding grubs up my friend oh hang on i'm developing feelings of hatred i'm predicting a customer will arrive and give my brain some sort of hellish experience yes bring him on let's try making some soup as you can see there are several different kinds we could make but they all start with putting some water in the pot i want to make a soup today okay where's the pot where's the pot we got a part give me a pot there's the pot now fill it up with whatever kind of ingredients you want it's an interesting business strategy isn't it they come in they say they want soup it's a mystery soup there can be anything in there at all what's been on my fingers i don't know i don't want to know okay then what have we got here what is that what is that what is that what is that hello put it in a flour tea bag flour flour tea bags now put everything in vintage grape juice pop-pop down it goes little for me little for you little for me little for you i never used to drink and then i started working here five minutes ago oh the fire does the dancing doesn't it really since this must be very very warm don't worry balance hey now is looking pretty delicious i don't know if there's mushroom for anything else give me these little balls what are these balls from i dare i ask dare i ask bacon just get put meat in there if there's one thing people like in the supers copious amounts of meat what's that oh that's the cork from the after that in there as well i'll stir it with my hand get down in there there you go oh that's oh wow it's a wonder of scientific technology isn't it avocado flour and mushroom soup i feel like you're missing some of the ingredients in there i'm really nice so i'm going to give you some bread because no what are you doing used to make i'd know bread today i brought you a very rare steak it is a 1984 vintage eh i wish to have it prepared it's from 1984 what sir are you aware that this steak is a piece of [ __ ] i mean you've got you've got you got stuff you've got stuff fine if you die don't blame me okay unless it's the best death you've ever experienced and please spread the word wait a second before you plate that did you realize that was famed meat aficionado meatbot no better make sure our service is exceptional better slip this on the plate too are you braving the man i don't want to brag the man i value my work i feel like i do excellent work here oh fine but i'm gonna put pepper in his wine five stars huh why do they want to come in here just look dead hello it's my little timmy bot's birthday can we get some pizza for the kids no no i know where this is going to go i know where this is going to go i know where this is going to go i don't want to feed them if i poison them then maybe they won't come back and complain instead of pizza madam shall i read you today's specials i've got one soup and two delayed abortions probably shouldn't have said that never mind one tomato puree kind of paste thing coming right up that's wrong button i know i know here it is delicious now apply sauce to bread it's just bread though it's not like fine whatever i mean these don't look very pizza like to me but that's fine go ding ding go do you want cheese you want cheese of course you don't have cheese on a pizza what are you doing where's the rat poison oh cactus will do it's done oh looks like enough to supply the festivities send them off to the dining room that how did that hap okay hey child hey [Laughter] he's gonna do anything i forgot to mention little timmy is deadly allergic to tomatoes could you make a special slice what do you want instead of sauce on your pizza timmy make me applesauce the human will make you some applesauce go sit down now i'll tell you what i'll put an apple in the already made tomato sauce timmy is also allergic to warmth could you just serve the ingredients raw i could do that no problem sure that's actually something you did that actually makes it easier huh bing done thank you shut up shut up she's gonna come back again i know she is i know the type the human made it special for you there's tomatoes in here i can taste it no there aren't no there are not no there are not if you can't prevent even next next next can you help me out here sure i'm trying to propose to my romantic partner oh i want it to be a surprise right can you hide this ring inside a sandwich or something how's she putting it on she don't have any fingers or anything my goodness i just i i think i've invented a way for fortune yes give me fortune yes give me many monies and fortune yes shall i become rich my blood turned into gold sounds uncomfortable but i will be worth many many things maybe hunted by hunters themselves i just feel a little sick i'll make your bloody sandwich yes i will yes i will i'll make your bloody sandwich yes i will yes i will and where the hell the eggs are the egg i'm gonna cook it never make any egg sandwiches i will yes i will i want to have some romantic music playing while i do it but i forgot to burn this disc to show affection for one another humans of the past would burn music onto primitive storage devices called discs the details of the burning procedure have largely been lost to history oh i am quite the musician myself though my friend would you like some fine tunes to soothe the soul and use your passage through this hellish landscape we call life this could be my big break job up this could be it this could be a people watching you never know who's watching that could be a talent scout anyway maybe one of the fish i have nothing prepared i'll just just make it up as i go along this could be my microphone go so you came to krusty's gourmet for the sandwich of a lifetime hmm well i'm trying to do like an english berry white thing because the ladies like berry oh you sat at the table and you looked at each other and you wondered is this correct i said no that's all right you fall off was the answer but love is a lie just bit into a whole bloody orange don't trust anyone they'll always let you down but my sandwich of crusty's gourmet is true so eat it and put it inside of you my sandwich feels much heavier than usual my sweet i emotion you will you enter a legally binding partnership with me i'm the happiest spot in the world oh wow the answer was affirmative the answer was affirmative oh that's really sweet now they're gonna go run out and get hit by a vehicle is there anything more romantic i'm so lonely working in a restaurant if you come back on there they demand that the man give me a sandwich give me a pizza with applesauce they say my boy he's allergic he will die i say sure how's it happening there because i want him to die a little bit why am i cursed to this existence why oh that music was doing something very fierce to me i didn't i i didn't shake it off i'm back next order please let's go for it the kids are all finished with their pizza and now they're ready for cake we do get a free birthday cake right no no you can't argue with that because you can pathetic idiotic mothers wanting all that god they have things in the world for their stupid kids that they got them special but they're not special they think oh my son my boy oh they're so precious to me i'm the only thing that ever matters in the world the only thing that ever bloody manners but they're not they're not there's an egg there's a flower what more do you want huh what would you want in the bloody cake besides the eventual failure that you your bloody children will grow up to become an extra little sprinkling of regret for your stupid little idiots how about this huh pizza 101 so you can learn what a bloody pizza is timmy you stupid pink hat wearing son of a literally you're she's a [ __ ] your mother's a [ __ ] timmy this better be a good cake if it is i'm eating it oh that's how that works huh too much sodium can lead to bad health conditions such as but not limited to dying i hope you like salt on your bloody cake stupid little spoiled childish nitwit let's get going hey what you didn't even eat your cake hey boss that party left a huge pile of dirty dishes we're gonna need your help to get through these well that's okay we'll just take it out come on what's the point of having a posable thumb that's it i can't watch this shut up shut up if people are decent then i wouldn't have to stress so much if he was just good together where's he gone where's he gone where's he gone jump up where have you gone hey come back oh no i've upset the only one that ever cared about me kind of maybe i assume okay i'll wash the bloody dishes up where are they getting the sauce from i didn't make that much sauce i didn't make that myself at all i don't know where they get my brain is screaming to me everything is on fire i would like to die oh there you are hello welcome back the health inspector's on his way over and i don't think we're gonna pass inspection oh no you need to clean this place up why it's fine it's sanitary you can start by destroying all this old fruit why didn't you just throw it on the street what is wrong with bloody wait what is your buttons he said but what do i do what do i do i'll eat it i mean they're gone they're gone it's grapefruit oh wash it a little bit does that help a little bit of soap on it will make me feel better probably now we need to deal with any potential insect problems we got fish we can pretend they're insects oh blizzy hell what are they they're little angry batteries with matchstick legs something about these guys get rid of them quick crunchy i'm gonna make them into tea that's fine isn't it bloody clean up the goddamn place just people are making i'm the only one helping how did you think i put this here i didn't put this here the rage version of me is not the same version of me here comes the health inspector does he want some tea everybody stop what you're doing it's inspection time all right then i'll just tally these results [Music] but boy i hope we pass and it looks like you've passed yes there's a bot here to film an episode of some tv show with you they say it was already booked ahead of time i have no idea but then bring him in bring him in first step is to blend up this protein pill let's get a shot of you doing that oh there's still some gold tomato apple paste in here this is [ __ ] yeah this time probably not yeah practice for this i've seen the professionals got to make it original gotta make it special gotta make it believable hey guys it's your boy krusty oh my god i felt sick just saying that today in krusty's gourmet we are exercising our right as human beings to have big pills and blenders and stuff perfect isn't it for the next part we put this cleverly labeled flavor packet into the microwave like so many people say microwave is cheating those people are stupid and you never want to listen to stupid people and when i put the flavor on the cube and it's delicious [Music] yes yes just act like it's real delicious all right okay i mean i've eaten a lot worse than this you know what viewers at home this is the best cube of something i've ever had in my life hmm i can't get enough things that taste so good can't be so good for you but apparently this is it's delicious hey thank you so much human this is some great footage this episode's gonna be fantastic great i'm glad i can out where are you going go i have a contract with some money money hello hey guys again with my dreams running out the door hey human check this out i found this rare turbo ghost death nova pepper can you prepare it for me all right come on put some heat into it you got heat eases heat give it here any of these people paying is this this is a question we should be asking holy smokes this is way too hot come on i got you whoa you really save my circus what i do it's what i do happy to help very happy to help nice little bit of service bloody hell the place is on fire what do i do wipe it with a flower how do you put a fire out i have no experience in it i'm kidding of course i'm a master of the elements my friend i just got word from the tv studio human they liked your performance on that commercial you did they do they're sitting in a camera crew and they're gonna put you in a reality show what you ready human okay bring in the talent talent no i've got all the talent you need right here hello nice to meet you human i'm chef bob rems head okay we'll start with the meatball scene what and no no i haven't seen a script what are you waiting for human get cooking bloody hell why are you throwing your balls at me hot balls coming right up there we go there we go there we go there we go there we go there we go big black balls that but i just actually said that as a thing that came out of my mouth it's truly despicable my kids could cook a meal a hundred times better than that and their graphing calculators okay what that was good yeah well great so far human i know i could be a little loud on camera okay or just part of the show you know yeah yeah i understand like i may be new to this world but i get you worthless chemical based meat bag make something good show us what you can do for anything um um i got it it's a disco toasty i'm a musical act as well so i mean a broad range very broad range you just don't pigeonhole me yeah cut that's a wrap folks i've got a lot of respect for you after this am i a star now i'll hear from you i mean i could do movies i could do music i could do theater i can do comedy i could do many things you want to hear a joke would you like to hear a joke a mother walks into a restaurant for two kids they say they want a pizza they don't want tomato sauce they want applesauce boy are they really stepping on tomatoes no no anyone i thought it's pretty good well i'll see you tomorrow i guess this is my life just close the door if you would thank you very much to my patreon producers mr carey tucker matthew wilhelm dave radegan chrissy carver xavier the green alex mayer alexandria rodriguez textual code 5 nappy 9977 melissa ferguson subjected ethan beard alec mcneil victor eight s kelly haytham spencer mercel joshua cross cat clone jackson jokers danny sorenson sarasota 1974 two bagels francis

Channel: IAmCrusty

Views: 1,806,876

Keywords: vr, virtual reality, gaming, video game, vr funny moments, virtual reality funny, job simulator, job simulator vr, job sim, job simulator funny moments, funny, moments, job simulator gameplay, iamcrusty, job simulator restaurant, chef, restaurant, job simulator chef

Id: cFVc_1Isv_8

Length: 17min 29sec (1049 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 17 2020