IT People, What Are The Funniest Questions You've Been Asked?

IT people overheard it what are some of the funniest questions you've gotten had a lady call me over to her desk because of her mouse was apparently behaving strangely I got there only to discover she was using it backwards I also had a lady complain that a laptop mysteriously shut off on her got to her desk and found out she had unplugged the power supply and thrown it in the trash because it was in her way I used to work at the Geek Squad a woman came in with just the monitor and said that she couldn't get an application to run and requested that I fix it for her when I told her that she needs to bring the tower or the rest of the computer she refused to believe me and requested a different opinion I can't log into my computer what did you guys do to it she wasn't pressing enter after typing in her password yep it's always our fault I will always remember this one user who phoned to complain that they could no longer log into their bank account online turns out they have changed their internal domain account password and were convinced it would propagate to all their external accounts hotmail Bank Facebook yes it was as recent as that if only we did have that much control if only also worked with someone who every couple of weeks would call me to reset her password because I forgot my password the calls finally stopped when I set her password to my forgot nippers ward I hate to when people ask me to come fix their internet explorer and I get there on their issuer's user I can't log into Facebook me that's not a work-related site can you log into the company website user yes me then there is no issue we do not support your access to Facebook get back to work goes back to office and browses read it yes hi I have this nasty habit where I'm typing and I want to press the a key but I hit caps lock instead now how do I go back to normal case I'll press the button again me cringing hoping I didn't misinterpret the question and insult the guy okay working at Best Buy someone points at a speaker and asks so how many gigs is this this one goes to 11 all of these are 100% things I've had happened to Emmie not secondhand one I had someone asked my why the mouse wasn't working right went up there and she was holding it upside down like the cable was coming out of the bottom up was down down was up to I had someone tell me the computer was making a loud beeping noise went up there and the fire alarm was going off three had someone tell me their computer wouldn't turn on she neglected to tell me the building didn't have power four had another technical person ask me if they could ping a device that isn't turned on I typically consider myself tech ignorant but after reading all this I feel pretty accomplished in my bigger computer skills after a while you learned that it's not the stupid people they are okay as you can show them something and they will generally not understand why or how but they won't make the same mistake the real idiots you get like the ones in here are they people who just plain don't even try to understand I work at a law school with lots of senile elderly professors who really don't know how to work the technology my favorite quote of all time is this the Internet take me back to the thing with the doohickeys I spent several minutes trying furiously to figure out what he was talking about and out of frustration finally closed everything and gave up turns out the thing with the doohickeys was a desktop nice one once I had a user call me up and tell me his computer was possessed I walked into his office and found him and another user watching Microsoft Word he would start typing something normally and then random words would pop up in his paragraph even I found it a little odd I kick them out of his office so I could drop my all-knowing IT God act and look confused and click on things as we do in this situation it wasn't long after that I noticed a little dictating note in the corner of the screen seems they somehow turned on the microphone which had never been used or calibrated before and as they talked it did its best to figure out what thus sentences like Fox staples Todd selling jab we're popping up where the cursor was and the more it happened the more they talked I turned the mic back off called them back in and let them though I had exercised the computer thank God I'm not the only one who shoes every one out of the room and confusedly poke at crap when I have no clue what's wrong I worked in a place where most office workers had dual monitors with the desktop extending onto the second monitor somehow one latest settings reverted back to a single image so she had two monitors displaying the same image she called in a panic asking us if she had been sending multiple copies of emails to people as a result but not kidding lots of jewelled monitor users where I work someone had an old black background and asked why only one monitor displayed yet they were both turned on I dragged the mouse to the other screen and saved the day I had a library patron come up to our tech help desk today asking if I could show her how to factor a polynomial I said we don't typically do that kind of thing here her response well it is a help desk isn't it couch a Salesman I ended up helping her out her boss at work calls every unknown now in a world I get calls like when I click on the computer world all the little worlds are gone or my email world isn't working I kinda like it lives in his own world my mother doesn't understand the concept of minimizing Windows she'll call me and say I don't know what happened I was typing my resume and now it's gone it just disappeared and Microsoft Word is chilling down in the taskbar Microsoft Word chillin in the taskbar gave me an amazing visual I try not to be a dong to people who don't understand technology it discourages people from asking questions and learning but the best thing I got is the customer shoved a credit card and her floppy drive when she tried to buy something online I work for comp repair of Staples six years in tech support two memorable calls one PC isn't working properly 20 minutes off troubleshooting before the customer mentioned that the power supply had caught on fire the night before of to customers details are confusing me I asked her she is talking about a phone jack or power outlet she responds I don't know I'm not a technical person I had someone call me once while the computer was currently on fire I told him to put it out he asked me to put it out I was at an ice so I said no he asked for a supervisor no problem how do you spell light config asked by my network administrator he was fired later that day I work in server support had a guy call on the second of January of this year and say we think they're suffering some from y2k issues he had a lady call in and say I know someone is hacking my computer because when I turned the monitor on it said auto-adjust in progress my favorite of all when I was doing desktop technical support I had a guy call in on some issue and I helped him out with it during the small talk at the end of the call while I'm updating my notes he was explaining to me how great off a customer he was and that he had spent a lot of money with our company the conversation went like this guy yeah I bought this computer and one of your printer scanner combos and I went ahead and bought ten ink cartridges for the printer because I use them so fast me thinking that this might be a sales opportunity so what exactly are you printing with all those cartridges you might be better off with a laser printer guy well I run a cell phone tower construction business I've got crews all over the nation every week at the end of the week each crew leader emails me their team's time cards in Word format so what I do is I print them out from all of the emails then when I have all the time cards printed I put them in a stack and scan them in so that I can keep track of all the time cards for that week in one single word file me okay and you're keeping the paper copies for record-keeping purposes guy no I shred them again in laptop support a lady called them said I just took this laptop out of the box for the first time and it won't turn on so I asked her if she's plugged it into a power outlet her response I paid a lot of extra money for this computer to be Wireless second-favorite working at Walmart nights as a part-time job for supplemental income a group of three thuggish black guys come in with their sneakers white tees dreadlocks gold teeth etc think rapper stereotype I'm not racist only descriptive so anyhow they're all milling around on the networking components they are looking at wireless routers cable modems wireless adapters etc I asked them if they needed some help and they quickly said no like they wanted me to just go away so they stood there a little longer trying to figure out what they needed with confused expressions on their faces so I let them have a few more minutes to themselves and walked back over and said if you just tell me what you're trying to do I'm sure I can help you so the lead guy or the head guy or the speaker for the group or whatever he looks left looks right makes sure no one's listening and then leans in and says we try and to hijack the internet I asked more questions and realized that they were trying to steal Wi-Fi from their neighbor I showed them what they needed and told them to come back if they had any problems I could go on for hours with this crap please do the last one was hilarious working helpdesk my desktop looks different can you set it back to how it was sure I can do that in what way is it different I don't know it's just different dot I'd need to know what to change to know what I need to reset can't you just set it to what it was before this went on for five more minutes of me trying to extract exactly what was different and getting nowhere until she finally got tired of how slow I was and hung up on me yes we backup your user profile after every change please log out so I can restore I am not an IT but this is a good one our old office fax machines spit out the original in the front of the machine after scanning it we got a new one which spit out the original at the back of the machine the first time a co-worker used the new machine she placed the original in the document feeder and hit the fax button she saw the original get pulled into the scanner but didn't see it come out the back she came running into my office saying I have made a terrible mistake I have faxed the original I swear this is true dude I think we worked at the same place this was probably 89 but I had a receptionist who thought the fax machine rolled up the paper really tight and sent it through the follow line because the fax spit out the paper behind it yet there was like five years of faxes back there behind the cabinet why can't I print anything twice in a week from the same person because they'd arranged everything so the chair would roll over the USB cable and unplug it printers Bay Novel IT personnel I'm thoroughly convinced that heck is nothing but a big room in which the walls are lined with printers and fax machines for a large company and you're the only IT guy shudder worked in a retail store and had a middle-aged lady come up to me and ask me if she were to put more songs on her iPod would it get heavier because you know she wanted to run while listening to music and didn't want it to weigh her down a few weeks ago I had an old guy coming to the help desk asking for help with his old magnetic tape answering machine it wasn't recording messages and he claimed that someone had hacked it by playing some kind of funny noise into the phone while it was recording a message I explained to him that's not how that would work and I asked him how long he'd had the machine he said fifteen years I know that's a long time he said but it's really reliable machine I've even used the same tape for ten years I told him he may want to replace the tape since it had probably worn out well he gave me a knowing smile and said no that means that they win I was a work-study student working teach support for the university I get a call saying that a teacher was trying to play a movie through her newly purchased laptop but it didn't work I ran through basic troubleshooting techniques one is it connected if so describe the connection it was good to press win + P it was outputting to the projector 3 did you select the proper source the projector can switch between about 6 different sources yes 4 did you put the movie in it won't fit what I try to put the movie in but it won't fit at this point I am befuddled I asked her to describe the movie a flat disc shiny on the bottom with the logo on top sounds like a normal DVD I can't think of anything I can do over the phone so I tell her I will be right over grabbing the university's test DVD on the way out I run over and find her standing in the front of the class with a laser disc needless to say nothing will support that I tell her and she Pat's my arm in a grandmotherly fashion and says I figure that might be too new for the university I brought a tape she then pulls out a VHS version and then exclaims this is too thick to fit ignoring the VADs what she said from her highly amused class I explained that both formats are older than I am and are not standard in the classroom but to play a VHS tape you need to request a machine from the library because the university owns so few I then show her the test DVD and put it in her laptop it begins playing and since she did not have a DVD of the intended film she canceled the class I hate these types too we recently got rid of all the VHS players in all the podium systems installed in 90% of the classrooms teachers were absolutely livid that we got rid of their format of choice every time I calmly explained that supporting the VHS players was becoming too costly but the multimedia hub had a service that would copy VHS to DVD for them not a question but amusing little story my company has been dealing with a barely functional terminal server that the customer has been putting off upgrading they contract us to manage their desktops servers network etc so we get calls about it almost every day it's loaded with malware running slowly etc my boss and another tech were looking at it and they found 14 gigs off P what's worse is my boss couldn't delete her because there were people looking at the P while he was trying to delete it he ended up forcing users to log off that had those files open and then deleting them when I worked for Comcast I showed up four on HSD high-speed data install the customer led me to the brand new computer he had just purchased from a pawn shop an Apple IIe I crap you not this was in 2003 I explained to him that not only was that computer not new there was no way I could connect it to the Internet and he should really go back to the pawn shop and return it he told me they charged him $1,000 for it and the policy was no returns sad part the guy was in his 40s should have seen Apple IIe in high school this hurts me so much poor guy her why does my speared sheet look funny me because you opened its inward her oh or another time when we used to use medicine to a desk talk I was trying to find out where a particular workstation was located so I sent an S into the desktop asking for them to call me on my cell I wait 15 minutes nothing so I send another and wait another 15 minutes then I send one every 30 seconds eventually I get a panicked phone call at my desk and she tells me that someone is asking her to call a phone number and what do I do dot after I stopped banging my head on the desk I explained everything epoch nets and was the greatest thing ever in college I have a guy on the line right now who is insisting that his cable modem is making his computer crash though the best is still the guy who said he had a virus in his Ethernet cable red acting while on a support call classy : in my younger days working dial-up support user I can't get on is it closed me I'm sorry is what closed user the Internet what time does it close the internet closes at 8:00 p.m. weekdays 7:00 p.m. weekend that central time zone of course people in Asia that want to get online have to switch to night shift jobs my wife once called my cell phone me hello wife did he find your cell phone me me yes when my friend forgets to charge his phone and it dies I routinely let him know by some sing him cracks him up every time I had a girl sent me a text once asking if a two gigabyte memory card is bigger than a 256 megabytes card I try not to judge people too harshly for not knowing these things so I replied 1 GB equals 1024 MB she texts back no maths for me just tell me which one to get even now I'm stupefied just thinking about it I think it brings out the hidden violence in me that I want to find this woman and shake her until numbers fall out of her mouth Rep I have a question for you me ok go for it Rep my power has been out for the last couple of hours silence me that's not really a question Rep oh yeah is that why my computers and Tom me fess up on computers are like birds if it's dark they go to sleep I work at a hardware store and I had someone ask me about glues I asked what are you gluing she smirked paused for a second and said well I work for a hospital and we have this training dummy a male training dummy an anatomically correct male training dummy and some interns were up horsing around and ripped off her well the so-called main feature of said dummy I could not contain my giggles and neither could she good times my girlfriend picked up the power adapter to my laptop and said and I quote Wow your hard drive is heavy you must have a lot of stuff on it yeah frickin double whammy funniest saddest was from my internship supervisor is I need you to make a backup of the model product database and store on a disk it's probably best to use a DVD me going online to see how big the table is make a dump of it is so is there going to be enough space on a DVD for at all me it's only 175 kilobytes is blank stir so will it fit a little piece of me died that day he left right after and everyone in the office burst into tears laughing as we were all programmers and he was our boss I called my mom who in turn told everyone in the office and everyone else in the family who then told everyone in their offices laws were heard by all I was working as a consultant and Enterprise CRM system when a customer of mine called me frantically one morning our application log file is getting very large this morning it's already at 500 megabytes and I'm afraid it will eat up all the disk space now in this log file usually stays around a few 100k for a 24 hour period I agreed to drive on over there and investigate upon arriving and examining the log file I saw recurring unsuccessful login attempt by a particular user over and over again I'm talking about 60 login attempts per second without giving too much information I asked the local IT team if they recognized that user name and they said it was one of the girls in their network operation center I inquired regarding where that was in the building and proceeded to walk down the all to her office upon entering her office I immediately walked over to her desk picked up her purse from the keyboard which was hitting into constantly on the system login screen I explained to my customer who was quite embarrassed at this point problem solved and proceeded to leave the building and get back to real work that one is your fault for not locking her out after three attempts had a guy that needed to update a program on a proprietary controller on a piece of machinery the program had to be loaded from an SD card onto the controller he called to say that he was on the last step of the 15 step process one turn off device to insert SD card et see that the program wouldn't update couple questions blah blah is the SD card seated properly well I didn't have an SD card so I just skipped ahead to step 12 when you don't need it anymore fess up um I attempted to FASS a desk but there's so much junk on my desk that it ended up being a face DS game this is kind of related there was a redditor a while back that posted an IMG don't remember the caption if the picture was on his monitor a screenshot showing his parents on a webcam chat taking a screenshot of their monitor with a camera I think it summed up nicely the problem between IT versus non IT we had a machine that is connected to a UPS on a shipping line it runs Windows 2000 well apparently the battery in the UPS frightened when I replace the UPS the system rebooted turns out I got a frantic phone call two weeks later wondering when I was going to finish fixing the machine I drove all the way back there to see what was going on apparently the instructions taped to the monitor case keyboard screenshot hanging from the rack next to the computer that showed the username password and domain fields and what to enter into them were too complicated in the six years since I've worked here that machine had never once crashed or rebooted I showed the user how to log in and the machine was fixed I knew Windows 2000 was solid but free the company I work for was having a used computer sale they were getting rid of all of their old equipment this meant that old desktops hdds knicks ram et Cie were being sold a co-worker and I were standing in line and he picked up a couple of ten stroked 100 Nick's in amongst the other stuff he was getting well a lady standing behind us in line overheard us talking about them she politely asked my friend what they were and what they were used for he responded that there were four connecting computers together so they could talk with each other she intently listened to his explanation we turned back towards the front of the line moments later she turns to her friend and asks what do computers talk about pokerface how about the opposite Bell Canada tech support once told me that my internet connection was fine and they were able to communicate with my modem keep in mind that I had already done a bunch of troubleshooting on my end and had determined that the problem was with the service I hadn't plugged the modem when the guy told me he could ping it I told him it wasn't plugged he said that unplugging it from the computer doesn't matter I told him it that both the power and phone cord were unplugged from the wall here's a stupid part on his end he said I usual then proceeded to ask me multiple times whether I was sure I hadn't plugged the right thing from the wall TL DR Bell gave our service to someone else then didn't believe me when I said my internet service was down considering the kinds of phone calls he probably gets in some of the posts in this thread I don't blame him for that I know I'd be pretty skeptical if somebody said they hadn't plugged something and I was still receiving ping replies from it had someone ring up saying that the G key was continually being pressed and they couldn't log in got them to tap the G key a few times reboot etc no change unplug the keyboard still happening a case start unplugging USB devices halfway through it stops it was a Microsoft Wireless USB dongle they threw out their old wireless keyboard last night after they shut down but it was still in range and leaning on the G key he cracked up point was quite funny haha that actually sounds like something I could see anyone doing equals P me a case and now click on my computer then now son how in the heck am I supposed to click on your computer I actually just remembered a second one that I am posting this on behalf of my dad who was a sysadmin at one of the two big telcos in Canada my dad is sitting in a meeting with some of the district managers and a few chief officers it was a project planning meeting where my dad was a subject matter expert on a system they were planning to decommission I cannot recall if it was the CIO or CTO that turned to my dad and asked hey Pete how do I keep my hard drive from filling up so often my dad responds straight faced with oh just use smaller text in your Word documents see IT oh oh sweet thanks Pete Juliet man for neurological practice here I don't necessarily get stupid questions not any that I feel would tickle you pink or even half pink but I will point out this as my least favorite aspect of IT here's someone walking towards my office adjust things on my desk hey IT guy I have a problem okay tell me about it I usually buckle in my chair at this point verbatim well I'm getting this thing with that program we use it's keeping me from accessing my login to get into where I put my username and password and it's also telling me that I have the wrong password I went ahead and deleted the thingie on my screen so that I would reset the user settings configuration WTF no really WTF and it still gives me the same error I wish I could full can punch my coworkers sometimes common neurological practice lock eye contact deadpan well it shouldn't take a brain surgeon to figure this one out sunglasses are optional can you tell me what my a I am password is hunter 2 if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video bye for now [Music]

Channel: Internet Is Fun

Views: 29,511

Rating: 4.8854027 out of 5

Keywords: #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, emkay, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub, askreddit school, r/askreddit how to, it jokes, it jokes time, funniest questions, professionals, job, work

Id: -mUqkSpAeZ4

Length: 28min 19sec (1699 seconds)

Published: Thu May 07 2020