If Google Was a Guy (Quarantine Edition Full Series)

[Music] next google six feet away please come on glad to see you i'm sure you have questions about the pandemic rhinos elephants are what toilet paper in bolts sold out sorry uh paper towel in both sold out too tissue paper in bulk sold out you know in olden days we just used rags underwear in bulk very gross how do i zoom video conferencing is a great way to stay connected do i zoom on facebook where to begin how do i facebook how islands stay put nothing about coronavirus the quarantine islands have anchors mojito recipes so you're going to need mint don't have it lime don't have it club soda don't have it and rum mojitos online yoga class good for you staying in shape online zumba class regular exercise is a great stress reliever online crossfit class just be careful too online chiropractor class pace yourself the rate of spread in foreign countries the us government response exclamation point but for quiet chicken a lot of grocery stores are sold out so you're gonna need to get creative farms near me good thinking some farms will deliver vegetables right to your door stealing chickens not that creative how to wash hands soap is one of the best weapons we have against the virus memes these are pretty funny actually jules hands but for how to wash hands oh she didn't calculate volume sphere why not ask a parent for some homeschooling uh calculate volume sphere these hands are washed like so with water first and then with soul this slaps dow jones bad news s p 500 new yikes nasdaq sorry animal crossing real estate not a real thing dollar to turnip exchange rate how long quarantine this says two months months this says six months oh my god and this says 2021. i have longer if you want animal shelter animal shelters are struggling right now so it's a great time to bring home a quarantine buddy adopting a chicken not that creative time of day 4 p.m day of week thursday month of year april 2020 can suck my so you know the year what do i do do the five wash your hands often cough into your elbow don't touch your face keep a safe distance from others and stay home you're touching your face i suddenly can't stop flat curve theory finally flatten the curve means that if we practice social distancing we can control the spread of the virus over time keeping hospitals from being overwhelmed and saving lives sorry flat earth theory oh god i need a mojito miami beach parties you realize how irresponsible this is i'm 22 you could still give the virus to someone older than you or someone immunocompromised or die from it yourself no one is completely safe sexy hazmat suits stay home how to feel normal look it's normal to not feel normal we've never gone through anything like this as a modern society so go easy on yourself and look for pleasant distractions exclamation point but for quiet let's find out these hands are washed like so with water first and then with soap scrub back and forth and to and fro for at least 30 seconds next go let me guess a question that has absolutely nothing to do with coronavirus or the quarantine or it's about coronavirus it is yes really yes okay let's hear it coronavirus called budweiser virus in mexico diy haircut using a pair of clippers carefully whoa shave my head dude shave your head face mask wearing a face mask isn't just about protecting yourself it is about protecting others so i thought a face mask really gucci face mask upgrading wi-fi might i suggest a google router upgrading neighbors wi-fi wow fire starter yeah this isn't the apocalypse you've been prepping for animal traps just stay home and watch tv bulk ammunition what about bear grylls do you like bear grylls can you train a plant tiger king what a wild series episode two phew same time tomorrow three four five six seven special interviews behind the scenes cast instagram accounts okay um carol baskin murdered husband drug cartel connections ukulele chords here's c g and d and one chord songs uh put the lime in the coconut ukulele amp i'm very sorry for your neighbors oil price is negative it's supply demand see when supply is too high pay me to take oil not how it works i have like a whole room i'm not using sourdough starter this is fun sourdough starter is a living thing how to feed sourdough starter just water and flour every eight to 12 hours what to name sourdough starter ah look when i said living thing college fund for sourdough starter twins with two dads growing a beard just let it grow you might have some bald spots but whoa save my beard shave your beard twelve hundred dollars that's your stimulus check this to help with food and rent and other essentials gambling on marble olympics essentials twelve 1200 face mask come on 100 router people chicken coop let me guess 1200 chicken coop stealing a chicken coop not that creative small business loans here's your application can i ask what your business is that's just some mom and pop shop shake shack yeah just some mom and pop shack 7 p.m noises why to celebrate health care workers 7 p.m start of purge the purge hasn't started when is the wall of china great who says that's just what it's called while it's trying to rotten tomato what is tick tock oh please don't summon him battle check [Music] should i do something he'll wear himself out don't let this flop second wave the 1918 spanish flu caused in part by public celebration of the end of world war one killed ten times as many people as the first wave more people than died in world war one feminism oh sorry one track mine lately open america you dumb idiot you think it's your right to risk other people's lives what kind of person are you even free joe exotic when is the purge actually scared you're not alone lonely we all are impatient look i get it but we have to be patient for a while longer or we risk losing more lives a lot more lives horny hey great news i'm the internet [Music] you had this dance y'all want to see you try it charlie d'amilio i'm looking at you come on guys 900 more followers and i can go live [Music] well aren't you adorable santa covert super spreader oh god contact free present delivery keep her what do go to a dentist dentist risk covet like three out of five dentistry tutorial youtube i don't like where this is going how socially distanced reindeer play chess online queen's gamut right so good uh learn chess online it's a difficult game play checkers online elves paid sick leaves playstation versus xbox to date the playstation 5 has expects the xbox boasts gameplay bids here you go did you wanna buy either of them or no no no no no no no no more gameplay bits play connect four online ellington lower school hybrid learning schedule mondays and thursdays okay don't not come to school we don't don't not from noon to 1 p.m except for lunch played tic tac toe online rescue dogs here's a list of rescue dogs in your area ooh kiwi the wiener mix hey wayne the waiter man you're the wiener mix um all right i think she was first dangerous now get the pogba the plot no get the pug mix dang it cloven 19 numbers pretty bad climate change stats even worse white terrorism deep fakes bio warfare solar flares nuclear bombs earthquakes wildfires so we're just doom scrolling now bad news near me um i'll handle this every second wednesday students must appear over zoom in uniform at 7 a.m or pm it does not say cooper the doodle mix koosh the palm mix tanner the husky vehicle collision with injuries what is the point of this you know so people feel safe report a person asks dr fauci a doctor and infectious disease expert dr fauci young uh do you mean age dr fauci shirtless is this like a patient in love with their doctor thing dr fauci fan cam donald trump won the election no obama born ken no pizzagate no pizza bagelgate santa hi colvin risk oh good lord santa comorbidity report of pedestrian flattened by zamboni huh i guess you're not the only one joe biden ankle replaced with hunter biden no nancy pelosi is the impossible no over 19 real no i mean too late man armed with flamethrower barricaded inside starbucks anxiety medication well there's xanax tonic valium how to get anxiety medication well you'll need a prescription health insurance job uh ocean spray skateboard guy watch twice and call me in the morning all the toilet paper there's no need all the bees to hoard anything extra freezer that's not so bad the word vaccine last year's new year's resolutions let me just pull up that google doc spend more time with friends and family travel more go on more dates use your phone less watch less tv drink less booze stop complaining mayans end of world year 2012 miles dyslexia what do you oh shhh [Music]

Channel: CollegeHumor

Views: 620,910

Rating: 4.8989706 out of 5

Keywords: Collegehumor, CH originals, comedy, sketch comedy, internet, humor, funny, sketch, if google was a guy, google is a guy, google guy, brian huskey, collegehumor google, google guy quarantine, quarantine edition, if google was a guy quarantine, collegehumor google guy, if google was a guy full series

Id: Ag86dYOG9iM

Length: 12min 8sec (728 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 27 2021

Reddit Comments

[u/febrium]

I liked the originals more than this

[u/emeraldwizard0910]

You gonna credit collegehumor, the amazing you tubers who make this funny content and so many other amazing videos

[u/baldhumanmale]

“Last years New Years resolutions list?”

F

[u/TheGoogleGuy]

Hello!

[u/gstudent]

Is it crediting CH when the video was posted by them? Not a real call the OP could make

[u/Mathvegan]

-Girls college -College girls -College girls nude -Kate Upton tits

[u/50missioncap]

Compared to the originals, I thought these were a little too on the nose.