Ice Age explained by an idiot

welcome to ice age and we got scrat doing scratch stuff with his nut and almost dying several times then we got a bunch of animals migrating for the winter and manny the mammoth going the other way cause [ __ ] society he marches to the drum of his own beat that is backwards then we get to see character number two which is who got abandoned by his herd because he's a [ __ ] then angers a couple of rhinos by spoiling their salad and he runs away from them into manny who is immediately annoyed by him but tries to save him nevertheless okay look if either of you make it across that sinkhole in front of you you get the sloth the fact that they're even considering this to be a true fact that we're seeing sid run across to get to manny just tells me that these rhinos are even more [ __ ] stupid than sid no matter though because sid reestablishes his superior retardation by showing that manny was bluffing there ain't no sinkhole so manny fights off the rhinos and saves sid who then decides to stick to manny and accompany him on his travels because of safety reasons to which manny responds with hey oh [ __ ] off man stop following me but sidward is one persistent comrade and proceed to stick to him like shunagam that is also backwards cut to a human settlement and a bunch of saber-toothed tigers planning to attack and leader cat wants a tiny human alive because some some they wiped out half of our pack some some revenge some some and the feline responsible for getting the baby is diego we attack a dawn says the [ __ ] and then we cut to manny and sit building shelter and bonding sort of scrat almost done again and i'm not gonna even try and count how many times this rat was supposed to die because let's be real here if you've seen the movies you know this motherfucker's invincible also according to cartoon movie physics this night should have turned into a popcorn from that lightning just saying moving on don has arrived and the kitty's attack human mama protects ice hbb from diego he corners her by the edge of a waterfall so face no other options she goes [ __ ] it then after the kitties regroup leader kitty's like what the [ __ ] the baby at man [ __ ] jumped off a cliff man i don't know what to tell you dude you bring me back that baby horse i'm gonna [ __ ] turn to cements me [ __ ] fine man jeez okay i'm gonna bring that bad baby calm your titties so the gang splits up and the humans follow the big pack thinking that they have the baby or they kill or something meanwhile downstream manny and sid find the female and she gives him the infant then disappears how does this baby not have hypothermia and where is his mom's body don't corpses float okay so apparently it takes a while for it to float like three days because of biology decomposition whatever my bad oh my god just like we gotta take this thing back up to its herd up there you see smoking stuff yeah i'm not doing that go [ __ ] yourself fine i'm doing myself you know i like to see that numbnuts so sid gives it his best shot at climbing the side of the waterfall a valiant effort said when he drops the child and diego arrives like i want that thing it's mine and then like i don't think so and man decides to help sid return the baby do the humans so that the tiger doesn't eat it they get up there to the smoke uh top of the hill or on top of the waterfall and the humans have left on the way to glacier pass because of winter and diego arrives like you'll never get there before the class closes up i can track them let me have the baby and i will make sure to personally deliver to humans very safe no way jose we're going with you so you don't eat it so they travel as a pack together and on their journey little cup bag won't stop crying so they check his diaper for the poopies but it turns out to be clean and they throw it away and they just threw away their only clean diaper and the movie will continue to act like this little [ __ ] machine doesn't take a dump throughout the entirety or the rest of the movie whatever baby still crying so they get it some food by fighting off some dodos for water malone in an epic game of rugby baby eat and they sleep that night but diego will be fake sleeping and he try to steal the little [ __ ] machine when everybody else is asleep but he hears a noise so he goes to check it out and it turns out to be a few members of his pack okay if a few rustling leaves prompts manny in his sleep to tighten his grip on the baby then this [ __ ] huge ass tiger war should totally wake him up but it doesn't who cares diego has a meeting with cat on crack and discount scarf and tells him that he's not just bringing a baby for dinner but also a mammoth and a walking bag of toxic waste aka said and tells them to tell the leader [ __ ] to prepare for an ambush on manny or something like that later on okay so he goes to sleep and next day baby is gone but don't worry sid was only using it as a chick magnet and he gets chased by the gay rhino couple diego saves him by pretending to eat him and then we get a travel montage where diego finds a singular tiger footprint and replaces it with a human track that's right one just the one in this entire [ __ ] snowy wilderness accurate whatever they go ice skating then play pictionary with scrat where he tries to warn them that they're gonna get anally defiled by a bunch of saber-toothed tigers but they no get it because they are super [ __ ] dense also jacob takes care of it they keep moving and diego sees the humans before sid and manny so he's like hey yeah i found a shortcut in this cave let's take it and they are forced in there because of a mini avalanche and almost died via impalement from a bunch of hanging icicles why are you guys standing still the icicles are clearly only at the entrance of this [ __ ] cave all you have to do is walk in a bit more and you're safe it doesn't require that much brain power your [ __ ] [ __ ] beans anyway they walk in some funny memes happen a star trek reference then square accidentally goes onto an icy slip and slide so they go after him to save him and how and i mean how in the kentucky fright [ __ ] did that baby make it through that part without dying doesn't matter ride's over and diego goes who's up for round two shut the [ __ ] up homie you basically [ __ ] yourself the whole way through they keep going and find some cave paintings and learn about manny's past either he lost his wife and kid or he lost his mom and dad or third option this isn't even historian he's just really pathetic next they make it out of the shortcut cave and get pretty close to glacier pass when lava starts [ __ ] the ice from beneath start smelling and [ __ ] and diego almost dies trying to escape but manny saves him and in doing so almost dies himself and diego's like why'd you do that man you could have died because diego the power of friendship i love you man i love you too they keep moving but it's too cold so they tuck in for a night and the baby takes its first steps does cute stuff and pulls on diego's heartstrings they all go to bed and scratch shows up like oh now it turns into a popcorn sure fire makes more sense but according to cartoon science lightning still showed on the track movie [ __ ] you next day comes and they start moving and make their way to where the pack of liptars want to ambush them and diego tells them about the ambush because he a good guy now and manny gets mad and wants to [ __ ] kill diego but he's like okay listen i have a plan we can fix this i'm on your side now i'm on youtube okay so they believe him and use sid and the baby as bait to get these three retards to go after him but sid uses expert snowboarding skills to get away until he does it and loses the baby but it turns out to be a psych not a baby wait a minute where the [ __ ] did they get the baby quilt for him or like the baby wrapping thing yeah the baby wrapping whatever where they got that from last time i saw i was once said drop squirrel where they keep until this moment inside says [ __ ] [ __ ] that i got [ __ ] anyway takis get cooked and the three stooges got surprise attacked by manny sid gets the baby from hiding and then the [ __ ] cat on crack in the ass then the rest of the [ __ ] try to corner and attack manny but diego do the defending and takes a bullet for manny metaphorical bullet he actually takes a bite okay then manny kill the leader [ __ ] via falling ice and the rest of the [ __ ] run away because they are indeed [ __ ] and they check on diego who's kind of dying right now except i see no blood but uh you know it's a kid's movie understandable i'm just addicted here anyway they're like sorry you're dying bro but we kind of gotta run give this baby back to the humans they get to the pass and just about catch human dad being sentimental and [ __ ] man he reaches for the baby dude goes into attack stance and many be like [ __ ] i'm trying to give you back your baby give me that [ __ ] give me that [ __ ] guy thinks he's about to get [ __ ] by dead man he reaches behind against his baby and he's surprised as [ __ ] calls off to other people trying to attack manny he's like whoa probably given this shot just a second ago i asked where the [ __ ] was the baby answer probably hanging for dear life off the right side of banning i know why they just do it this way okay i mean we already know that manny and sid have the baby and trying to return it and the dad would have been just as surprised if it were writing in his usual spot because he wouldn't be able to see it because of manny's huge stature and his killer weave wait a minute was the baby hiding inside his killer weave never mind baby walks back to da da they are reunited cute [ __ ] fun stuff really happy for you my guy just remember your wife's still dead though baby gives city many a goodbye hugs and the ugly dad gives them a little shitty necklace that they'll lose in literally under two minutes or maybe they shove it up said to ass for safekeeping or hide it in manny's killer weave again i don't know anyway diego shows up because he's not dead his butterfly wound he says goodbye too and said man he found out he's alive and i'm really happy about also check it out no no necklace say that unimportant though mission is a success the baby's back and they walk off best buds also squat gets frozen for twenty thousand years and finds a coconut this movie gets five sunflower seeds out of seven pistachios [Music] you

Channel: High Boi

Views: 7,776,370

Rating: 4.9195848 out of 5

Keywords: ice age, ice age explained, ice age recap, ice age review, movie recap, movie, recap, spoilers, funny, haha, lol

Id: P0gbjSvPVwA

Length: 8min 6sec (486 seconds)

Published: Sun Jan 17 2021