I hired e-girls in Rocket League and then pitted them against each other

ladies and gentlemen welcome to another sunless con original series we're calling this one dancing with the simps e-pals youtubers and the great big gold army it all started on a site called e-pow where you can hire e-girls and e-boys to play video games with you while the concept is a little strange i think it's harmless and even kind of wholesome alright so who wants to drive around and smack some balls i'm better than you hello let's go win some matches i enjoy long walks on the beach uh i am a gc interrupt here's how the show works first i hire six e-pals there aren't many to choose from in rocket league but eventually i found some that were okay with being in a video i didn't want it to be just e-girls so i tried to find some guys but pretty much none of them responded so i had to get the e-boys from twitter the whole process was pretty awkward would you be interested in facing some hey would you be interested in being in a video hey but with my wife's permission i made it through this stage next we needed to find out who the strongest of the six rocket league e-piles were so i pitted them against each other to weed out the weak first they would play a single game of standard 3v3 the two lowest scoring e-pals in that game would be eliminated the remaining four would then 2v2 and again the two lowest scoring e-pals would go home leaving us with the two most powerful e-girls or e-boys next we would move to the simp stage i would team up with rocket league pro rizzo and almost 1 million subscribers youtuber mercy and face off against the toxic gold army from the 1v7 video with first killer we have possibly sunless con not sunless con may be sunlescon statistically sunless con musty number one youtuber and 100 sunless gone they score their first goal and they all want to save him after round one the lowest scoring player on my team would then be replaced by an e pal finalist and we'd move to the second round after that again the lowest scoring would be replaced this time by the second and final e-pal leaving us with two e-pals and a single original teammate who would then be crowned the simp king versus the horde of five golds for the grand finale if you're not even a little confused by now you're not experiencing this show to the fullest so let's just get started before it sinks in [Music] millions of people are gonna see me playing like yo i think i'm gonna be the very first one to be like literally on the lowest so i designed i've never noticed an mvp so if you just chase the ball like you should get points i am a ball pacer it's over yeah there you go it's gonna be just like a herd of cars chasing a ball i can't musty but i can breezy occasionally it makes no sense what are these words so literally the password is no password yeah there's no the password isn't no faster you typed in your password that's it you're out two of you will be going home but four of you will be moving on are you ready let's go hit auto oh two crossbars i like your club name you boy so so far the lowest points are your boy and okay july you can do it make me nervous your boy oh oh i was just a little too high oh that's a banger that is oh green pulls ahead though your boy wait is it girl who is that okay that's confusing we have a try hard in this in this lobby i'm not trying sure as the game went on it was pretty clear the three from the orange team were going through and the two e boys kesa and virgil were in a dead tie for the second elimination spot i think didi might be safe another dish okay that was such a dirty fake that was so dirty i feel bad because it's literally a 3b2 i'm just doing nothing at least i'm protecting them to not to be eliminated like sacrificing myself that's very true it's very true kj is out and quesa is out so close by 16. one play we're playing i want to keep seeing it you can stay in the call if you want to you can you can spectate if you want case already left but yeah you just uh he's gone he's had enough here we go the top two from this move on to the grand finale all wrong oh my god how'd you do that she's nuts holy crap you change the arrow buttons and then you arrow is what you do oh my bro what is your rank you guys need a 3v1 against dd that's it yeah what's your rank like how many hours do you have in the game 900 something wow no the same amount as me and i have a smurf as well with like roughly 300 i think what am i literally the only one that is near to the game you might be probably like even in my banner on april i'm like please be nice because i'm new i did that because i followed you he ordered me and he got really mad at me and i was like bro i told you i wasn't dude people would do that man i was like i pay for you because like you're supposed to carry me and i was like but even how do you i said that i'm new to the game and he was like i don't listen to that and i was like you should have he's like i don't read but it was so funny because he sound like very like you're super super angry but then he lift me like five stars and like good reviews boy what is that car i don't i don't know it has a weird name like ninja racer or something [Music] didi was emerging as the alpha e girl but a second e pal finalist was also emerging oh what a goal why are you doing this to me bro i didn't mean to i was just going for it oh my god there it is we have our two finalists dede and your boy wait i got the most points yeah i got the most points okay which youtuber is going to make it to the end rizzo all day who's that he's my dad is your dad he's my dad good luck good luck thank you the name of ipo very yes represented bertie hi what's up dude so much man what are we doing um okay so here's what we're doing wow it went all out on this one sunless this one this one took a lot of development okay so the goals are ready perfect any questions no i think i think i got it down there okay what's this rule on page three about is rizzo here by the way yeah my ex-boyfriend and i used to play uh oracle right yeah and then we used to watch sometimes no stamping nothing like that kenobi i called crenovo rizzle i called you rizzle i don't know why i felt like that's actually a thing yeah some people call me rizzle jane is it yeah jay nubs i called him jayden you should call him that rizzo yeah jay dads wait dad or dab dance that makes way more sense you're just trying to get points so it's kind of like we're kind of on the same team but we're kind of not yeah so i'm going to try to seal your goals steal goals and ball chase so mercy should be pretty good i'll tell them to leave when we're ready to play so yeah you actually you actually won't be able to expect yeah we're starting i'm actually really curious about this matchup five golds versus three two gcs in a pro i've never done this before believe it or not [Music] rizzo i hate you so much i'm not letting you get that yeah it's so fun your teammates boost on purpose instead of accidentally it's a shot shots that's good ten points there [Music] oh yeah there we go that's almost common is pretty mad seems a little upset oh this guy's just bumping me i thought it was you for a second because but it says knots on the skull that's the trick oh oh no i got the assistant i'm 30 points behind mercy okay so i didn't want to explain this in the intro because it was too long and i didn't have time to explain it in between rounds because that was also too long so i'm doing it right now in the middle of the game and there's nothing you can do about it so in the simp stage we're obviously trying to ball chase and get the most points rather than play as a team and that's the whole point so that we can play in the final round with the e pals and be the simp king but what i left out was the motivation to win that final round and that motivation is you need to have more points than the e pals which then converts you from simp king to simplest emperor okay hopefully that makes sense and if it doesn't that's probably that then oh no no why am i passing to you i mean that was predictable to be honest no yes let's go why am i back another assistant i got another one no i don't want to be out already out of my own video rizzo and i are actually like a really good team man shut up that's it no more defense we have that minecraft chemistry exactly like i'm just going to keep passing to rizzo if i can just wow don't kick me out bro i need this assist oh that's good is surprisingly close to me it's surprising i would like no goals yes i still got the assist though oh from that oh yeah yeah insurance have tabled the turns have tabled completely but it's close only 22 24 points what constitutes a clear oh that did that was a coin two points two more fighting for them i get a shot yes oh thank god man i'm actually i'm like losing losing let's go yeah you are it's actually four or two it's okay safe no i tried to get i didn't know if it was a safe or not i hate my life actually let's go oh my god can you squish what happened mercy oh you hit the crossbar and then you tried to steal and then you hit the ground i'm so mad i have 18 seconds who would have thought that mercy didn't ball chase enough planet are we living on rizzo i believe that's four points oh you took away my shot it's a four point double touch right there oh yes no yes no hey let's hear the second gold oh my god you are out no get out of here actually maybe there'll be a bonus for something maybe i got most maybe i got some points no you're done you beat me by 11. i didn't do anything the entire game like and then at the very end i just scored knock me out of my video you [Applause] make me proud girls bro now i have to spectate my own video am i competing with your boy it's just me you're competing with rizzo will you be my rocket league girlfriend i think i think it's over for me this is where my story ends oh nah i really don't know why look at that pass dude that's a two's team right there yeah there we go look at that red the shot yeah i have two points perfect positioning i i did everything hey what if i just stay like in front of the goal and anytime rizzo tries to score i just steal it would be a good oh oh oh i have a feeling your boy's gonna do better than me would oh you're so close it's clean you're lucky this time what's a good pass i don't mean to oh my god i can't even get out of our own like half no how did it go through there was so many people in front sometimes it's like hard being the best player in the world wow people ask you how did he do that i'm like i just don't know man rizzo's still ahead by 20 points just oh no why'd i pass it to you oh i mean if you lost to dad like you couldn't even be mad yeah i guess i would have got the assist though so i guess that's still something i'm still so salty i'm still in i'm still in shock i'm still over here i'm spectating cause i thought i had that one locked up don't don't make me feel bad now no i don't feel bad that was hilarious i just i'm still shook that's all oh no that's a pass oh who touched that yeah [Music] [Laughter] so so far the e-pal is doing the best on orange team no no your boy is not a gold i'm not in gold yeah the e pals are good for the game oh dude he didn't even jump he didn't even jump because you shot him this guy's a subscriber of yours look at the shot he didn't even try to say that rizzo getting upset over gold mistakes statistically some of the scott says he girl i tier one sub you if you get a flip reset score so that's out there i've never done a single one in my life bro i do flip free stuff but they're so [ __ ] who do you want to see mercy you're trying to steal it if i do something why is there someone named have fun on this account i just realized that imagine having fun in broccoli all right oh let's go oh no i hate that oh another great pass that makes it interesting wow mercy now has a five point lead it's all the lead i need this is tight let's try it he's actually saving i hate this please yes is that your shot yes yeah rizzo takes the lead so many cars i keep getting bumps yes oh god i flipped it out of the way that was the closest thing of all time i flipped out of the way i had that i'm so mad steal oh my god oh my god you're almost like i know that's myself that's my sub oh with that save rizzo takes the lead with this shot mercy wins oh [ __ ] okay what is this good as me what gold saves that i'm so mad it's like a ten point difference it's really close i'm gonna hit it it's really close yes no wait oh why i'm so scared oh yeah gg wow oh man that was actually so close rizzo is the simp king who would have called it so now we'll have rizzo ya boi and didi against the five golds in the other video they got stronger and stronger so don't don't underestimate them what just happened call this off what's going to happen to the e-pals anyway they'll get two ten thousand what's gonna happen you just i'm gonna send to the shadows you get buff you get the butt that's the currency right you get tons of buff yeah it's beautiful touch yeah that was a great best that was nice you get extra buff for that extra buff it's called buff on ebal the money from uh it's gone buff oh man that's great oh more bombs you missed one by one wait is that is that similar to like cheers on twitch or something cheering on touch yeah like buff on e-power yep can you buff me 200. what's the usd value of a buff so right now dd actually has more than rizzo so not in a good spot but he's coming back working on it not today why do you ask i'm just just wondering so these goals are getting absolutely wrecked no everywhere dude i'm gonna cry rizzo's like living in the server this is my server three points separate them i wish every game was this toxic i'd have so much content dd you need a touch you're so close all right he's gonna get it clear he's got it frizzo did i do it wins yay good job rizzo that was actually really close again the first and probably last wow that's awesome man i'm the only one that's trash here that's not fair don't don't undersell yourself you should be you're worth more buffs than that no what i mean is like it was about like wait what happens now that's it you just go home yeah is it a 2v2 is it a 1v1 no it's over you're not allowed to play that's not included in the buff

Channel: SunlessKhan

Views: 2,864,799

Rating: 4.9373989 out of 5

Keywords: rocket league, rocket league pc, rocket league best, rocket league guide, rocket league funny, rocket league moments, rocket league pro, funny rocket league videos, multiplayer games, xbox video games, ps4 video games, free pc games, epal, egirl, gamer girl

Id: 2K0y9ihfbWI

Length: 19min 3sec (1143 seconds)

Published: Sat Oct 24 2020