>>> WE NOW RETURN TO THE HOLIDAY
BAKING CHAMPIONSHIP, ON THE FOOD CHANNEL.
>> ALL RIGHT, BAKERS, HOLIDAY WISHES WHERE YOU HAD TWO
HOURS TO MAKE THE CAKE OF YOUR HOLIDAY DREAMS.
FIRST UP, BEFORE THE JUDGES, IS HOME BAKER, LOUISA.
>> MERRY CHRISTMAS YOUR HONOR. >> OH, LOUISA, WE'RE NOT THAT
KIND OF JUDGES. >> OKAY.
WHY DON'T YOU TELL US ABOUT YOUR CAKE.
THANK YOU. GROWING UP IN TEXAS, SNOW IS A
RARITY, SO I DREAMT UP A WINTER WONDERLAND MADE OF PEPPERMINT
BUTTER CREAM. AND IT LOOKS LIKE MR. ELF HAS
TAKEN A DAY OFF FROM HIS SHELF, WITH HIS TAFFY SKIS, FONDANT
MITTENS AND COCONUT LIME SKI HATS.
>> THAT IS SO CUTE, LOUISA, AND I LOVE THE SENSE OF MOTION.
ARE YOU READY TO SHOW US? >> I AM.
I MESSED UP. IT'S BAD.
>> OH, NO, WHAT HAPPENED? DID YOU GET TOO AMBITIOUS?
>> YEAH, BIT OFF MORE THAN I COULD CHEW, AND THEN I CHOKED ON
THAT BITE, AND THEN I THREW UP THIS.
>> AND THE LEGS? >> ARE PLASTIC BABY DOLL.
I AM SORRY. >> SHOULD WE TASTE IT?
>> AS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT ALLERGIC TO MUSTARD.
>> WOW. WELL, NOT A GREAT START.
BUT OUR NEXT PERSON UP, IS AMATEUR COLLEGE STUDENT,
WILLIAM. >> HI, JUDGES.
>> HI, WILLIAM. I LOVE YOUR HAT.
WHY DON'T YOU TELL US ABOUT YOURSELF. >> WELL, MA'AM, FRANKLY, I
SHOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE TODAY, BECAUSE TWO YEARS AGO I WAS HIT
BY A CAR. >> YOU POOR THING.
HIT BY A CAR? >> YES MA'AM.
IT WAS A COSTUME CHARACTER OF LIGHTENING McQUEEN AT
DISNEY WORLD. IN MY DEFENSE, I WAS DRUNK.
>> WHY DON'T YOU JUST TELL US ABOUT YOUR
CHRISTMAS WISH? >> WELL, MY CHRISTMAS WISH, IS
ONE OF DIVERSITY AND PEACE. SO I MADE A CAKE WITH SANTA'S
FROM AROUND THE WORLD. EL NINO DIOS FROM MEXICO,
BABA NOEL FROM AFGHANISTAN AND HOEIOSHO FROM JAPAN. >> OH, MY GOODNESS, THAT'S MAYBE
THE MOST INSPIRED DESIGNED CONCEPT WE'VE HAD ON THIS SHOW.
>> I KNOW. I'M TEARING UP, JUST A LITTLE
BIT, THINKING ABOUT IT. >> CAN WE SEE IT?
>> OF COURSE. >> OH, GOD.
IT DIDN'T WORK. >> WHAT IS THAT?
>> OH, GOD. I DON'T KNOW.
I PUT IT ALL IN THE OVEN, AND THEN IT CAME OUT LIKE THIS.
>> CAN WE SHOW THAT CAKE ON TV? >> WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE -- LOOKS LIKE ONE OF TWO THINGS.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
>> WELL, WHY IS IT PUCKERING? >> I THINK IT MAYBE NEEDS TO GO
OUTSIDE? >> WHAT, NO, I DON'T LIKE THAT.
NEXT. >> WELL, NEXT UP IS SANDY.
TELL US ABOUT YOUR CAKE. >> WELL, MY CHRISTMAS WISH WAS
ALSO ONE OF UNITY, SO I MADE A CAKE DEPICTING CHILDREN FROM ALL
OVER THE WORLD SINGING AROUND THE TREE.
TADA. WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?
>> OH, CUTE. >> NEXT UP IS RALPH.
>> I'M SORRY, WAIT, THAT'S IT. THAT'S ALL YOU'RE GOING TO SAY.
>> IT'S JUST KIND OF BUSY. MY EYE DOESN'T KNOW WHERE TO GO.
>> ALSO, YOU KIND OF COPIED WILLIAM'S CONCEPT.
>> BUT, HE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE A CAKE HE MADE -- OH, MY GOD!
>> WHAT'S HAPPENING THERE WILLIAM?
>> OH, GOD! THE CHOCOLATE LAVA CENTER MAYBE
GOT TOO HOT. I DON'T KNOW.
STOP. OH, MY LIFE IS CURSED, AND SO IS
THIS CAKE. >> EW, I SEE CORN.
>> NO. IT'S A MARSHMALLOW.
GROW UP! >> OKAY.
WELL, LAST BUT NOT LEAST IS RALPH.
RALPH, I'M THINKING THIS ONE'S YOURS TO LOOSE, PAL.
WHAT WAS YOUR CHRISTMAS WISH? >> MY WISH IS FOR SOMETHING YOU
DON'T SEE EVERY CHRISTMAS, BUT WHEN YOU DO, OH, BOY, IS IT
SPECIAL. >> LET'S SEE IT.
>> SO, IT'S A CHRISTMAS TURKEY? >> NO, SIR, IT'S PENIS AND
BALLS, OF COURSE. >> GOT IT, NICE JOB.
>> NICE JOB? >> OH, HELP, PLEASE.
NO! IT'S GOT ME.
PLEASE! >> WOW.
WELL, WE HAVE ANOTHER TOUGH DECISION TO MAKE.
>> YEAH, BUT NOT SANDY, RIGHT? >> WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH THE
JUDGE'S DECISION, RIGHT AFTER THIS.
>> NO, SERIOUSLY, I NEED HELP, YOU GUYS, PLEASE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
Youtube is smarter than me and kept me from watching this SNL clip because I'm in Canada.
Death to videodrome
This version of the baking show sketch with Don Cheadle is also pretty Cronenberg