-Babe, so, before we go in, I just want you to know
that my mom can be pretty protective of me and I just don't want you
to get scared off. -Louis, don't worry.
We're good. -Okay. All right. Woo-hoo, Mama, we're home! -Mi hijo lindo, I'm coming. [ Laughter ] Is that mi hijo? -Mama! -The man of my life.
Ay, Dios mío. Luisito. Oh, my college boy.
I missed you so much. You. Don't. Call. Enough! Bad boy! I kill you.
I put you in jail. Ah! I love you so much. -Ay, mamá. Well, I love you, too, Mama. And I want to introduce you to
my new girlfriend, Britney. -Hi, yes, Ms. Florez.
I'm Britney. I've heard so much about you. Mm, you are cute. You dress like a boy.
I like that. [ Laughter ] -Um, ha-ha, Mama, let's eat. How 'bout that, huh?
-We'd love. And hey, my parents taught me
never to come empty handed, so I did bring
some vegan sliders. Louis, ¿ella está loca? [ Laughter ] Yo cociné para todos, ¿y esta niña viene a mi casa
con vegan sliders? [ Laughter ] -Is she talking about me? -Uh, yes, but in a good way.
Don't worry. Mamá, we're hungry, huh? -Yes! And this looks great. Where should I put these? -I'll take it. Thank you...
Sí, sí, sí. [ Laughter ] [ Laughter continues ] Sit, sit, sit. -Everything looks so great,
Mama. Thank you.
-So, Britney, what are you studying? -I'm actually studying fine art
with a concentration in 17th century Baroque
architecture. -So she doesn't like money. [ Laughter ] -Mamá, please. Britney wants to be
an art professor one day. -Yeah.
-Oh. So she's a lesbian. [ Laughter ] -Mamá, please.
-No, no, no, no. Mi nuera no puede estudiar
fine art y usar tu dinero para dizque
Baroque architecture. [ Laughter ] -Mamá, por favor.
No le importa el dinero a ella. -¿Te puedes imaginar?
Van Gogh, Picasso, Britney with the vegan sliders. -Okay, so she's
talking about me? -No le hables así a la pobre.
Es una nice White girl. [ Laughter ] Se cuida mucho.
Siempre se pone sunscreen. Y tiene mucho talento.
Sabe jugar ultimate frisbee. -Okay, oh, my gosh,
okay, listen, I am so sorry if I
offended you in any way. I only want the best
for your son. Like, Louis, do you remember
when you were having trouble concentrating for a semester? -Oh, no, no, no. -And I set you up
with my family doctor? -What? -Well, I helped Louis out. Now he's on ADD medication
and he's doing a lot better. -My son... don't have ADD! He just like to jump! [ Laughter ] -Well, ADD isn't anything
to be embarrassed about. Demi Lavato has it. -Ella entra a mi casa
con su "family doctor", hablando de que "normalize ADD". -Okay, she hates me! -She's not talking about you. Mamá, yo entiendo que no te cae
bien su unisex apparel. -What?! Y si no fuera por ella,
yo nunca viera "White Lotus." -Esta brujita, con su Pinterest,
hablando de que -- "Hey, man, wanna go get
some sweet green?" -What is she saying?! -Pero no me digas a mí
que te vas a casar con ella o tener una relación
"long-term", ¿okay? No.
-What? -A mí no me importa
si tú te metes con ella para un "one-night-stand", "hit it and quit it", "rip and dip". I don't care. That's okay. -Okay, that was all English! -Claudia, please, I would
just love to start over. -Yes. Could we please just eat,
huh? How 'bout that? -Yes. This looks delicious,
Ms. Florez. But before we eat,
mind if I say grace? [ Laughter ] -Grace? Oh, Mija. Louis... why didn't you tell me
she was a woman of God? -Oh, my God! -Now, where are
my grandchildren? [ Laughter, applause ]
