FUNNIEST TEXTS EVER V12

are you legal do you have your papers no hablar in glass you're getting deported ken url getting el deportido i carumba me as a wife look i got us a puppy you literally went out to get milk but he's so cute we have 23 dogs waterproof socks how do you wash them waterproof water son where are you i'm at a strip club mom what did you see anything you shouldn't have besides all the naked women yeah one thing let me guess your father no my sister hey guess what what i have a girlfriend wow good for you who's this lucky girl her name was emma who's emma imagination what's missing i what's the opposite of hate love what's the opposite of me a successful person grayson just asked if 10 is a big number what do i tell him cuz like 10 isn't a lot of dollars but 10 murders is a lot of murders is there actually something wrong with you why context is important he looks like the winner was you're aiding and betting russian mafia when you share flopper memes excellent it's what flopper would want your kid is in my yard again come on this again he's not wearing any pants and he's chasing my dog boys will be boys yeah but yours is 24 and drunk babe i think we need to put the cat down what why i'll get the shotgun hey if you weren't informed by mike it's mine and christian's wedding next month if you're buying us gifts the requirement is to buy us gifts above 250 dollars for either me or christian so what you are saying is that you want something over 250 dollars yep well then don't expect me coming we have beer cocktails cake well then you're losing because we have so much people here that have confirmed i wish you were here with me are you so sweet i wish i could kill you kill me what the frick what did i do kiss kiss i typed kiss hi is this eric who is this this is natalie from the grocery store i got your number from the cashier who you tried to ask out last month well that's a little weird but shoot your shot i guess i'm not flirting with you we have you on video eating 420 dollars worth of unpaid slim gyms nice so you still want to go out you didn't like my post yesterday on instagram what in the actual frick is happening right now whatever and now you're liking every picture i've ever posted okay we get it a whole not what i meant yeah i want to make sure i never receive a text this freaking stupid ever again baby i need help yes tell me you good at computers right my laptop going crazy can you help fix it which brand d y ah where did you buy that i never heard before i bought it online it's called diy baby take a pic of logo and send [Music] your ass is huge thanks honey but i'm your mother [Music] your brother got me pregnant and i'm keeping it did you see where i put the salsa the lol hey hey iguana what's iguana can iguana date with you oh that's smart but no i have to be honest i've been cheating on you okay ha are you okay with that i just told you i cheated on you wait joseph i thought i was texting joe who's joe joe mama it's the inside that matters not outside really give me an example refrigerator makes sense girl i just saw yo man walking around the mall with a fat beach but imma follow them around to see what they be doing i got you beach i'm walking with my man at the mall girl we need to go to the gym hi boss i'm pregnant so i would need a few days leave now to discuss this with my boyfriend please approve my leave please first discuss this with my wife she read your first couple of messages and why can't you type all this in one message so can we talk talk about what us why you wanna talk about the united states did your parents teach you that you have to buy what you break yes here's the full list of body parts and their cost part 119 000 give me my money beach hey dad i just caught ligma but i hope it kills you you know how much money i spent on you and you run great for less i spend hundreds of dollars on you and all you do is complain i wanna die and you know what i hope you freaking die like my balls got em hey bro don't talk to me why what did i do last night you were so drunk you got my ipad and put it in the blender really yeah and you said you were making apple juice yo hey what up nothing really just freaking your girlfriend brahma mento numero you know i love eminem i prefer skittles i mean the rapper not candy stupid why would you want to eat the rapper that's disgusting face palm i freaked your mom last night idiot not cool man she killed herself frick sorry man i didn't know after seeing your tiny d hey it's michael jackson i'm messaging you from a private account i'm not really dead can you cash out me 600 dollars so i can come back to the united states and put out more music hey dad i just got a girlfriend and she's pregnant what's the matter with you are you proud when you get home you're in so much freaking trouble your mother already knows and she's devastated who's this [ __ ] you idiot dad i meant perfect not pregnant i'm so sorry it's this damn phone auto corrected me oh oh god you just made me piss my pants son i broke your laptop [Music] would you like to be the sun in my life omg yes then stay 92 million 935 7700 miles a freak away from me i'm so glad you don't ever ask to have a threesome if i wanted to disappoint two people at once i'd go see my parents baby you're good in bed don't worry stop you sound like my scab master are you looking for love or hookups lmao i have no freaking idea at this point right now i'm just looking for dnd dungeons and dragons lmao d and dinner oh okay yeah that makes a lot more sense hey i need a favor from your parents i want to have a handsome baby how can my parents help you in that can you ask them which position they fricked in so i can avoid it the neighbors kids challenged us for a water fight i'm in just waiting for the water to boil what them my dad is a superhero the smartest man alive my dad what do you want for your password chicken it needs a capital chicken kiev hey surprise me and i will send you my nudes sorry i don't want nudes wow surprise yeah i'm surprised nudes please [Music] i got my boyfriend to play this game where you collect dragons and now he just constantly sends stuff like this it's the best game link in bio this dragon reminds me of you why cause your bubble butt be poppin what's up dude finally i told my crush that i have feelings for her and she accepted it she said i have to wait her until february 30th but there's no february 30th exactly hi doctor i how to read this it's paracetamol how about this i wrote amex sizzling three times a day mommy what you are in the biggest trouble you have ever been in just tell me not over text why because did you find the bodies in the basement what are you talking about nothing at all babe i'm pregnant and you're the father seriously it's a prank april fool's day babe you mean you're not pregnant i mean you're not the father don't you think it's funny how the person you're going to marry is on this earth as of right now yeah haha that's weird don't you ever wonder what they are doing nope i already know she's texting me ah but she just went to bed so i'm talking to you now hey paul i saw you were doing a photo shoot this weekend and needed a girl 2 model for you yeah i am and yeah i do sounds great i can come if you want cool who are you bringing what do you mean like who's the model hey mom i'm going to live by myself great your bags are in the driveway i'm sorry son your father and i are getting a divorce i just can't handle you and i swear to god if you reply to this with that god damn ninja troll face picture gamer time hey girl do you like trees because if a cat if a cat got stuck in a tree like in the tree if you were a cat stuck in a tree you'd be a cat i forgot the pickup line huh me wait so how big are you though are six fouries lol no i mean like in bed how big are you still six four just sideways no way dude congrats call me when you can the most perfect way to tell me wow i would like to freak you tonight baby hey dad all of your friends can see when you comment on this stuff hi do you still go fishing on sunday yeah i do why there is an app called plenty of fish my husband has it to meet fishing buddies thought i tell you about it oh for frick's sake christine are you for real seriously it's not a joke i will ask him to send you a link to it it's really good he finds someone to go with almost every weekend knock knock who's there police police who police make better jokes no they don't no i'm asking you to make better jokes hey mom hi honey can i get some money so i can go to the movies with my friends what do you think that i'm made of money yup i do mom made of money i have a new mindset what is it nobody exists on purpose nobody belongs anywhere everybody's gonna die hello tell me something that will make me wet go outside it's raining try again don't use an umbrella how is ruth not sure i broke up with her last month oh no you're so ruthless and how long have you been waiting to use that i'd rather not say i told my mom that trying to smash was slang for going to smash burger and now i deeply regret it are you trying to smash today no more my pack to lunch come on it'll be quick you can save it for tomorrow i'm good come on sweetie you're not too old to smash with your mother mom please stop saying that why don't buds have bras dude go to sleep i think it's called underwear why isn't underwear called underwear cause it's on your buns stop texting me a butt crack is just as cleavage how high are you about six feet wait how make chicken what whereby chicken mom this isn't google avocado most of the boys in tiktok the person seeing this meme some girl flirts with me me doesn't get it also me ten years later youtube videos only one percent of people can answer this question the question guess this animal [Music] when you're trying to take a screenshot of your minecraft base but the chunks won't load talking with the boys yeah i'm gonna smash her from behind like thor's hammer reality let's cuddle creates imperial system forces colonies to use it switches to metric makes fun of america for using imperial i don't know what tbh means and to be honest at this point i'm too afraid to ask him what are you doing her just sitting here in a tank top him send me a pic her parents don't you dare date a girl before you are 20 me dates a boy parents are you okay why do i have to beg for the bare minimum 20 year old me with my 60 year old back pains knock knock who's there door mom door mom who dormammu i've come to bargain do you trust each other me no yes you came to the wrong career fool [Music] the sunyan won't make me cry zoo separates five parrots after the birds were caught encouraging each other to swear at guests i fear no man but that thing it scares me 1950s we will have flying cars in the future 2021 flying car completes 100 kilometer flight between cities oh my god okay it's happening everybody stay calm what you doing when they come after you run up a single flight of stairs hello weary scroller please have some tea before you continue your journey when you unexpectedly show up at the olympic games tada astronomy astrology hi guys today is my 19th birthday just want to share it here since none of my friends cared i've only got my family and relatives who are aware of it it is critical we send birthday wishes there immediately creeper van old folks van the most expensive van ride of your life love is the most powerful thing in the universe me i hate titans turns into titan i hate ghouls turns into ghoul i hate vampires turns into vampire rick astley never gonna give you up rick astley giving up on love satan what brings you to hell me i'm innocent satan just tell me what did you do me i saw my friend fighting a pregnant woman so i joined to make it 2v2 satan if you water water it grows the eyes are open the mouth moves but mr brain has evolved far beyond any other mods are asleep time to post smooth yoda got creates dinosaurs dinosaurs don't build churches got nuke the lizards guy gets a new cute dog every girl after seeing the dog youtube youtube isn't isn't for kids for kids youtube isn't for kids demonetize everyone who swears clock hits midnight nature channels science channels is god just energy teenager history channels that one guy behind you at night what are you doing step truck worst she can say is no her female dragonflies often fake their own deaths to avoid having shreks when the teacher tells the class to shut up when you're presenting and you're just standing there like when you have an argument with your mom and accidentally slam the door pov you're about to die depression and anxiety cause memory loss i don't remember having depression or anxiety when your landlord says no dogs allowed korean music korean movies top 10 organs to sell to buy a gaming pc me and the boys how that one out of ten dentist who doesn't recommend censored i'm be at the annual dental conference roses are red bb8 is round me trying to process 20 20 20 22 in five months a body decomposes four times faster in water than on land who the frick starts a conversation like that i just sat down when we're young we sneak out our house to go to parties but when we are old we sneak out of parties to go home took my birds to the vet just to find out that they are sick as frick slow down or we will call your mom the orphan after seeing the sign i paid for the whole speedometer i'm gonna use the whole speedometer feminists who want superiority actual feminists chinese student 16 who studied in the uk brings the orono virus back to women after five years on the east coast it was time to go home bully suck loser me what do you want bully i'm dating your ex now me and i'm eating a sandwich do you want those leftovers too bull is fbi agent my fbi agent ice cubes float in a pool of their own blood who the frick starts a conversation like that i just sat down exactly 27 years ago i came into this world crying and choosing not much has changed do you think they are ready to initiate contact i don't know let's look at their technology man beats dark souls with a homemade pizza controller clearly they surpassed us long ago what's this looks quite sus catch among us the series coming this october to disney xd i have a question for god why when you're sleeping and someone decides to call you during the night [Music] i have shrek's daily i have dyslexia [Music] love is strong but the agm-65 maverick is stronger some disabilities look like this some look like this me every time i see a funny meme so i took your meme but i liked it first because i ain't in a hole i dispense wisdom what is your wisdom parents love the youngest child because they are the latest version that's a good wisdom me going to grandma me leaving grandma mom where are you i'm coming home home not delivered home not delivered home not delivered freaking piece of shoes pov you're about to die when you order ice cream at mcdonald's and they ask what flavor you want i don't know i didn't think i'd get this far tell me about yourself me trying to remember who i am and what i like loading me accepting the fact i'm not special and in fact i might be below average you are what you eat man arrested for everything impossible history teacher now tell me about what countries your ancestors inhabited that one british kid if we put the vaccine in mosquitoes this country would be fully vaccinated by 7 pm tomorrow why did we need radios our relationship is over our relationship is what over hey beauty how are you she's in the bathroom this is her boyfriend what did you want hey handsome how are you change team a scammer trying to convince me to renew my car's extended warranty 12 year old me who just found out i have a car karen 5g is bad fighter aircraft pilots supporting up to 7 or 8g i'm four parallel universes ahead of you me trying indoor rock climbing for the first time what introverts think will happen if they would start a conversation hi who the frick starts a conversation like that i just sat down if the earth was flat why haven't there been any spoiled entitled fame seeking influencers posting photos of themselves at the edge of the world checkmate flat earthers therapist thomas the tie fighter isn't real he can't hurt you thomas the tie fighter dad you can't just listen to weird music and wear ridiculous outfits like that also dad in 1984 being a parent ain't even hard guys literally only want one thing and it's freaking disgusting you're always trying so hard you've done a great job when your friend stole your glasses different countries long-range punishment asian australian american when you got shizzy parents but trauma caused by them gave you great sense of humor i'll allow it larry tesla inventor of the cut copy and paste commands dies at 74. larry tesla inventor of the cut copy and paste commands dies at 74 larry tesla inventor of the cut copy and paste commands dies at 74. when you don't have a personality of your own so you copy every good tray someone has me eating chips with a beggar because sharing is caring beggar who bought the chips vampires as soon as sun starts rising [Music] how to fish properly in america my parrot calculating when i go to sleep so he can scream his freaking brains out [Music] five minutes crafts be like [Music] pilot we are just experiencing a minor turbulence just fasten your seat belts the turbulence [Music] caesar were tracks in a textbook 11 year old me me listening to my crush tell me about her crush lioness and deer going back home together after a busy day working in lion documentary for natgia channel billionaires going to space for 15 seconds rather than paying taxes ending homelessness ending world hunger canceling student debt and etc four-year-old me after realizing their real names aren't mom and dad [Music] me searches how to deal with bullies google gives a guide bing [Music] like the video and subscribe right now and watch my previous tank memes videos thanks

Channel: Clumsy

Views: 1,929,050

Rating: 4.9342585 out of 5

Keywords: memes, dank doodle memes, best memes, dank memes, memes compilation, dank memes compilation, best memes compilation, clean memes, ddm, tik tok memes, memes clean, reddit memes, pewdiepie memes, family friendly memes, funny memes

Id: L5Gz2VT1iqw

Length: 24min 49sec (1489 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 06 2021