C'mon, Rick.
We're -- We're almost there. Ugh, leave me, Morty.
It's the only way. Wha-- Were --
Wha-- Were we -- Were we Blades
in that one? That's fucking tight. Just stay with me.
[ Creature roars ] I'm -- I'm scared,
Morty. I can see the end. I'm a silly man. I'm a silly small man. I'm -- I'm sorry
I got you into this. Then how about
I get us outta this? [ Alarm blaring ] Hello?
Hey, Jessica. I-It's Morty.
From school. Oh, hey, Morty.
What's up? Um, I just want to say
that you're really great. I know the timing never really
worked out with us, but you're really great and
I wish I got to know you better. Oh, I mean --
That's a lot. Oh, uh, yeah, sorry,
I guess I just -- No, I just wish
you said it sooner. Wh-What?
Yeah, I mean, being nervous is sort of selfish sometimes, y'know? Life support systems failing.
Yeah, that's a great point. Well, what are you
doing tonight? Tonight?
Yeah. Do you, like, want to watch
a movie or something? Um, yeah. Tonight.
Sounds great. Holy shit.
Holy shit. Come on, come on! [ Groans ] Oh. Where are we?
We're home, Rick. I-I landed us
in the ocean. The ocean?!
The ocean on Earth?! Uh, yeah, I-I guess so.
Oh, shit. Holy shit. We have to go. We have to go right fucking now. What?
You touched the ocean, Morty. What's the big --
Oh, fuck. Shit. What?
Shit. Richard! You have desecrated
the sacred treaty betwixt land
and sea. Now face the wrath
of your once and eternal foe -- Mr. Nimbus! Sorry.
Who is that? My nemesis. What?
My fucking nemesis, okay? Okay, but what was his name again? I am Mr. Nimbus! He's gonna
say that a lot. βͺβͺ βͺβͺ βͺβͺ [ Electricity crackles ] W-Wait, so who is
coming over again? He said his nemesis?
Rick has a nemesis? I guess.
Has he
mentioned him before? I-I was gonna ask you.
First I'm hearing it. Who is he?
Like a magic guy? Rick's science
and he's magic? He's like a-a fish? A fish.
He's not a fish.
He's Mr. Nimbus. He's king of the ocean
and he's a piece of shit. Are you happy, Morty? Are you happy you
touched the ocean? He's gonna be here
any minute. Just help me
smooth this over or this guy's gonna become
more trouble than he's worth. Um, hey, I don't know how much
I can help out tonight, Rick. Jessica's coming over
j-just to, like, watch a movie
or something, but y'know,
t-t-that's a good step. That's a solid step
to something, y'know? Truly nobody cares
about your dick, Morty. The sooner you learn that,
the better. I think you just don't
want me happy 'cause then I'll stop
doing your crazy chores. Trust me,
after that ocean fuck-up, you don't get
to do anything crazy. While I bullshit
my way through this peace summit treaty with Nimbus, Summer is gonna dive
into the Marianas Trench to recover
the forbidden shell that gives him
his power because Summer
can be trusted. Let's lick tits. Okay, what?
I don't love that. Of course you don't, 'cause you guys
aren't getting any. [ Scoffs ] Actually,
your father and I have been very
sex-positive lately. Eww.
Dr. Wong suggested we experiment. We've been watching pornography.
Together. Gross!
I might never come back from the ocean. Oh, you'll have to
tone it down, babe. The squares can't handle it.
[ Purrs ] There are suicide capsules
in all of your teeth. Do what you want
with that. C'mon, Morty.
You're on booze duty. Okay, Nimbus only drinks
the good shit. So just toss this
whale-ass ocean-wine in here and age it up
a few centuries. So time moves faster
in there? I-I-Is it like
a Narnia thing? I'm not a beaver who believes
in Jesus Christ, Morty. But yeah, it's pretty much
a Narnia thing. Okay, but Jessica --
All you have to do is bring wine, Morty. When do I ask you for anything?
When do you -- I haven't been to
a full week of school in years! I don't know shit!
And for what? How many enemies
do you have to have? Why is everything a fight
with you? You might want to
learn this early, Morty. Life is a fight.
With Mr. Nimbus? Are you
makin' fun of me? Mr. Nimbus is
an ice-cold dick killer, Morty. [ Horn blows ] Okay, let's go.
That's his magic ocean horn. Is that Mr. Nimbus? Nimbus.
Richard. You look like ass. Let's get this
over with. I'm sorry.
This is the guy? Jerry.
Hold on. No. I've seen you
fuck a planet, and this is the guy
you're afraid of? I like this one,
Rick. He is unbroken.
Untamed. Perhaps he could use
a firmer grip upon his leash. Okay, that's enough.
I'm calling the police. Go ahead.
Jerry. I will!
Good. I control them.
Excuse me? He controls police,
Jerry. Right,
that tracks. In Dumb World.
Police? A strange horny ocean man
is on my lawn. Well, I don't see how that's relevant, but we're white. [ Sirens wail, tires screech ] Freeze! Freeze! Freeze! Freeze! Fight. [ All grunting ] Fuck.
[ All moaning ] Flee.
Officer: Let's get outta here. [ Sirens wail, tires squeal ] Shall we, Richard?
Okay, but how did he -- Jesus Christ, Jerry. He's Mr.
Nimbus. He controls the police! Um, hello?
Am I in the right place? I just saw a bunch of cops
having sex with each other? Hi! Jessica! Hi! Yeah, yup, y-you're
in the right spot. Uh, everyone,
th-this is Jessica. This is everybody.
Uh, this is -- I am Mr. Nimbus. Jesus, Nimbus,
just get inside. Morty,
grab the wine. Yeah, in a minute.
C-C'mon, Jessica. Stand aside. Unless you are
worthy of Nimbus. [ Scoffs ] If that means
what I think it means, I'll have you know,
we watch porn together. Oh! Ooh! Wow, okay! Looks like you guys
just got the nod. The nod? Mr. Nimbus
has a sense for these things. I take it you're
a sex-positive couple? Oh, yeah.
Very much so. We watch porn together.
Great! I'll mark you down
as eligible for a threeway. Here's all the information
you'll need. The king of the ocean wants
to have a threesome with us? Totally optional. But a remarkable option to have,
I assure you. Very jealous. There's a form
on the last page so we know where to send
the gift basket. So that just happened. You don't sound
upset about it. Neither do you. Oh, my God.
Is this happening? To us? I thought this only happened
in New York or on HBO. Dr. Wong
hasn't been wrong yet. You're right. This is exactly
what she was talking about. So, uh, yeah. J-Just make
yourself comfortable. Y'know, ch-choose a movie or --
or we can watch some interdimensional cable
if you want. We now return to "Nintendo 69." Nintendo, oh, what are you doing to me? Oh, Nintendo, oh, Nin-- Or we can watch whatever,
y'know. Wh-Whatever you're into. Morty, did I hear you're getting wine? Yeah, I gotta get some wine
for Mr. Nimbus. Got any extra? Oh.
Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I'll go get some, just for you. Cool.
Hurry back. Looks like you could use a hand. Oh, hey!
Yeah, th-th-that'd be great. No problem.
Hoovy?
Dinner's ready! Be right there, sugar hoof! Just helping this young man through a portal with that crate full of alcohol that's been here for decades. Hey, thanks, Hoovy. I-I really appreciate that. I-I got a girl over, and I really, really like her. I-I'm just nervous.
Oh, I know that feeling. When I first started seeing Bova, I could only think about all the ways I was gonna mess it up. So what'd you do?
Oh, I messed it up. But I found the one who loves me for that. Thanks. I-I really needed to hear that. Here, t-take one of these.
Oh, you don't have to. No, I-I want to.
You have a good day, Hoovy. You have a great time with that lady up there. Just relax.
Will do! [ Thunder rumbles ] Bova? [ Gasps ] Why did you leave us, Father? Japheth? When were you born? [ Grunts ] I swore to Mother if I ever met you, I'd avenge her. It wasn't my fault. Whose, then?
Whose?! The boy
from the magic door. [ Thunder rumbles ] Shall we
discuss terms? Yeah, fine.
Whatever. Terms. Term number one --
I am King of the Ocean. The place I shit?
Go ahead. Term number two --
Stop shitting in the ocean. No idea [burps]
what you're talking about. Delicious. Another. Oh, uh, well, I-I was thinking of using this one for -- Morty, just give him the bottle.
God damn. Another! Morty, you get the wine? Hey, Jessica. Um, yeah, sorry. I just -- just going back to get it. Oh. I thought you already went. I did! I just --
just got a little busy. Going right now,
again! You go ahead
and fire up that movie! That's okay.
I'll wait for you. Holy shit, holy shit,
holy shit, holy shit! βͺβͺ I've been waiting for you. Oh, wow. Hoovy, right? Never say his name!
[ Grunts ] Jesus Christ! Why -- Why is every old guy super jacked? [ Grunts ]
Sorry! I'm sorry! I-I just need the wine!
I'm sorry! Stop it! Fucking kill you! Ow!
Okay, screw this! [ Groans ] You know what? You!
Yeah, fuck you, Hoovy! [ Groans ]
Father? It's him! I told you he'd come back!
Holy shit. Okay, look, he wasn't old
like 10 seconds ago. [ Grunts ]
Ow! Mother fucker! [ Groans ] I'm sorry, Father.
I'm sorry we never believed. He'll come back.
Stop him. Stop him. βͺβͺ βͺβͺ Papa,
why do we guard the gate? Because one day,
the dark child shall return. And we will be ready. [ Thunder rumbles ] Delicious. Where is your wine boy, Richard?
I thirst. He's getting it.
Stop eating beignets like that. Participant voids
all liability in the event
of death by orgasm? Are we really ready
to open things this wide? What if
it gets weird? What if
I fall in love with him? No, no, no, no, no.
Damn it! What was that? Another scheme of yours,
Richard? I know you're
planning something. It's nothing.
Will you excuse me, please? What the fuck is going on?
Where's the wine? Dad was horny
and I dropped it. God, I can't -- I can't believe
you're fucking this up. I'm not fucking it up! There was
a guy in the thing and -- There's always a guy
in a thing! Nimbus: Land dwellers do not
keep Nimbus waiting and live. Be right out!
Goddammit. Do you see this whisper kitchen
"Frasier" bullshit you're making me do?
Morty, just get the wine. Beth and Jerry,
stop trying to fuck Nimbus. Well, we wouldn't do it here.
I'll have you know he propositioned us. He propositions everybody! Hey, hey, hey,
Jessica. W-What's up?
Seems like you're busy. No, no, no!
I ran into a little trouble. But -- But -- But I'll go get
that wine right now. But you said were going to
get it like twice already. I-I-I was
and I-I'm getting it right now. [ Grunts ]
Holy shit, it's him! [ Trumpet blows ] God damn it!
What do you want me to say?! I-I'm sorry! βͺβͺ [ Cheering ] We finally beat him. But let's always
remain vigilant because you never know. He might be back
one day. Okay, Narnia!
Let's go. Let's fucking go! It is over.
The boy is not coming back. He always comes back. You have wasted
our lives, our very futures,
on a fantasy! A lie!
I know what I saw. You saw nothing! You are
a foolish boy! βͺβͺ Those called fools are the only ones brave enough
to see the truth. βͺβͺ βͺβͺ [ Grunts ]
[ All gasp ] βͺβͺ [ Grunting ] [ Grunts ]
[ Groans ] Tell me, Father. Am I a fool now? [ Grunts ] βͺβͺ [ Groans ] I was born in the pits
that made these stones. I lost my years
building a temple to a lie. So I made lies
my power. And what is power
but a lie we -- Aah! Oh, shit, he's real! He's real!
I was wrong! I was so wrong!
God is real! [ Gunfire, screaming ] βͺβͺ βͺβͺ Wow.
Impeccable service. Big tip.
I liked your other one more. What was his name?
Kyle? What?
Nothing. Can we just
sign this thing and go? Jessica, I-I'm so sorry.
I mean, it's fine. You were only gone
like a couple minutes. Morty,
are you okay? I'm -- I'm sorry,
Jessica. We just never seem
to get it right, do we? No, I guess we don't.
[ Chuckles ] But I'm glad
you called me. Maybe we can start over,
get it right this time. Yeah.
I'd -- I'd like that. βͺβͺ Thanks for
bringing the wine. Totally worth it. Do we need
an opener? Oh.
I'll -- I'll -- I'll go get it. Nimbus: Mmm. I do so love to sign
upon the dotted line. Shall we?
Jesus Christ,
yes. And who
is your witness? My witness
is the squid. Really proud of this
SeaWorld theme, aren't you? Hey, just get a witness, man.
Don't make this about me. Or perhaps
Richard has no one with whom
he can trust his life. Who truly knows him. Save me.
Fine! I'll get someone.
Oh, my God. Morty! C'mere.
I need you for some bullshit. Look, Rick, I've done
everything you've asked. Now can I just have some time
with my girlfriend? Your girlfriend? I mean, she's not --
we kissed, but I'm just trying
to take it slow. You gotta give these things
time to breathe, y'know? βͺβͺ Do you know why
you're special, Adam? Because I am The Traveler?
Yes. You will be the one
to pass through the door. You will be the one
to end our pain. But, Mother,
what about my pain? Your pain
shall set us free. It is time to begin. [ Warbling ] [ Grunting ] Again.
[ Grunting ] Again! [ Grunting ] You are not ready.
Please, Mother -- Do you think
he will show you mercy? Like he did to us? Again! βͺβͺ βͺβͺ [ Grunts ]
[ Gasps ] Does anyone
need anything? Does Nimbus
need anything? Holy shit!
Don't judge. We're growing
as a couple!
Aah! Why is this happening
to me?! For the future! βͺβͺ You dare assassinate Nimbus? Sorry. Wait.
Who -- Who is that? Get in line,
pal! [ Grunts ]
[ Screams ] βͺβͺ Such a waste. M-Mother? [ Screeches ] Aah! [ Screams ] Jessica! You just had
to touch the ocean. Aaah!
Shut up! There isn't time to -- It's all fucked!
And you fucked it! [ Screaming ] Huh? You're early. W-What is this place? The end.
But also a beginning. Isn't every end a beginning?
Stay back! I don't want your stripped down
Sundance sci-fi bullshit. Where's Jessica?
Jessica. That was her name, wasn't it?
Thank you, Morty. I had forgotten.
Oh, right. You'll be needing this. For the wine. βͺβͺ [ Grunts ] Oh, shit, we got him! Can you believe he bought
that fucking tree bullshit? We fucking got him! Very well. If you seek war with Atlantis,
you shall have it. Oh, I've already been to war
with Atlantis when I D-Day'd
that Mermaid Puss! I knew
that was you! Prepare my exit parade! Say goodbye
to your precious dry land! For soon it will be wet!
Wet! Yeah, global warming
is already doing that, asshole. But sure, yeah, go for it.
Make us slightly more wet! Am I a joke
to you? Yes,
you are a fucking joke! You fucking suck!
You've always sucked! Y-Y-Y know why
we haven't fought in years? 'Cause you're an embarrassment
to me and I don't need you
anymore. I don't need anybody. All I do is eat ass
and 69 Nintendos, bro. Every day.
Or maybe you hate me because I am the only man
to see how far you have fallen. I used to fear you.
Respect you. Now all that's left
is pity -- for a sad, drunk shell
of a man too afraid to see
how alone he truly is. If Diane were alive today,
what would she think -- Don't fucking establish canonical backstory with me, you Red Lob-- [ Gasps ]
Oh, good. You're awake. I just
took some wine! I said I was sorry. What the fuck
is wrong with you people?! I have been asking that
for centuries. I was created to study you,
Morty, to know you. But the closer
I looked, the more I do not
recognize myself. Uh, yeah, man, I really don't
have time for -- I have often wondered who
would we be without you, Morty? Are we anything
beyond our hatred? And when she came, I thought
she would be the answer. Frozen in time.
Forever asleep. We could not understand
her purpose, so we hid her away. Why do we always hide
the truths we fear? [ Groans ]
I don't give a shit, nerd! Let her go!
Why -- Why did I clone myself genitals? Ow!
I don't care, bitch! Do it! Ooh! Asshole!
Yeah, guess I am an asshole! Y'know, sometimes you gotta be
an asshole! My grandpa
taught me that! Okay, okay, okay,
fine! [ Groans ] βͺβͺ Morty?
Hey, Jessica. Wow.
Must've been some nap, huh? I-Is that ooze or --
I'm not sure what to call it. It l-l-looks like ooze. Okay.
W-We can catch up later. βͺβͺ [ Screeches ] What the -- [ Gasps ]
Rick! Rick! ...obster motherfucker.
Morty: Rick! Screw this.
What am I even doing? Help!
Where are you? Come back here.
I'm going to make the land wet! Y'know what,
I'd love to see it. Do it!
God, do anything! Just don't use me
as an excuse anymore! Rick!
Wow. That was intense. You look stressed. We signed
the paperwork.
I must go. Well, your people
have our number! Your starfish mentioned
some kind of basket? Jesus, Morty.
Stop! No, no! Not today! Can't you go one day without --
You don't get to -- What the --
I fucked it up, okay? It's okay, Morty.
That's what you do. Now lemme Deus Ex Machina
this shit and let's go home. βͺβͺ God, why does everyone go
Cyber-Punk Bird? So fuckin' hack. βͺβͺ Oh, shit. Well, that's cool. βͺβͺ Okay, we might be
a little fucked. [ Horn blows ] Did you think I would
let you die alone, Richard? [ Grunting ] βͺβͺ βͺβͺ I am Mr. Nimbus! βͺβͺ Wow. Phew. You -- You still got time
for that movie? Yes. Time. I had nothing
but time. Endless time. At first,
it was madness. Then enlightenment. Then madness again. But perhaps
it was a gift. I could see
the life of time. And as I watched
the life of time in all its fleeting,
terrible light, I wondered,
had I lived? Was I just the object
in another's story? Was that all I ever was?
Could I be more? I had nothing but time
and still no answer. Time without purpose
is a prison. I have glimpsed into the mind
of eternity. Perhaps the mind of God. And found
nothing but silence. I think we should
just be friends. Oh, yeah. I-I-I get that. Guess we missed
our moment. Yes.
But there will be more. For both of us. Goodbye, Morty. Hey,
how's it going? Fuck off!
I'm a Time-god! Fighting by your side again,
Richard. It was, uh --
Yeah. Then there is
no treaty. Because there is
no war. Aw, Nimbus. That's --
That's really chill of you, man. Richard. Before you were
my greatest enemy, you were
my only friend. Grandpa, I got the shell!
Shit. Okay, Nimbus, look.
You son of a bitch! Betrayal!
My weapons, Morty! I-I-I used them all!
Grandpa! Wait, Grandpa,
what do I do? I have the shell.
Should I blow it? Is that -- I'm --
I'm just gonna blow it! Don't blow it!
Destroy the horn! What the hell,
Summer?! You were supposed to
destroy the horn! How was I
supposed to know that? [ Groans ] [ Siren wails ]
Nimbus: Police! Take this piece of shit
to jail. I told, ugh, I told you. He's an ice-cold
dick killer! Nimbus!
[ Tires squeal ] Wait.
So how can he -- Jesus, Summer.
He's Mr. Nimbus. He controls the police! βͺβͺ βͺβͺ βͺβͺ βͺβͺ Jer, I think
more than one safe word sort of
defeats the point. I know,
I just wanna make sure we have
every opportunity to stop. Super excited
about it though. Me too, so excited. Jerry, are we doing this
because we both want this? Or because it's what we think
the other one wants? I just wanted to prove
that I love you so much I would do this for you!
Same! Let's take that prize
and get out before we make
a huge mistake. Getting cold feet? No. Please don't tell Rick.
He wouldn't understand. Yes, he would.
Fight, Fuck or Flee the 3 most common human responses to fear.
Man, as soon as the one guy helped morty and came through the portal, I said βoh no!β What a great concept
DON'T YOU ESTABLISH CANONICAL BACK STORY WITH ME YOU-
βAll you have to do is bring wine Morty, when do I ever ask you for anything?β
βWhen do you...I havenβt been to a full week of school in years! I donβt know shit!β
That Narnia subplot was so fucked beyond words.
Excellent work.
Whoever at Adult Swim decided to do this, thanks so much.
And to whoever at Comcast decided to move Cartoon Network to a more expensive packageβ¦fuck you
The way he controlled the police completely caught me off guard
Fantastic episode. He is Mr Nimbus Summer, he controls the Police!
Won't lie this was probably my favorite season premier since Seasons 1/2
Super excited for this season!