Fighting Zina - Imam Omar Suleiman

snarl Haman hamdulillahi rabbil aalameen what I read one in lalalaura mean where on Cuba too much Akeem llama salli wa sallim wa barik alaa optical sudoc muhammad in sallallahu alayhi wa sallam ala aalihi wa sahbihi wa seldom to see min kathira so first of all i just want to make something very clear you know when when shikharp the nasa was talking about the importance of the parents and you know in a very moving talk you know sometimes when we talk about like the self and the stories of the people that came before and you know there was imam ahmed rahim Ajala who didn't get married until his mom passed away who refused to get married to his mom passed away or you find you know Zain al Abedin rahim allah wouldn't eat from plate until his mother a from plate and those types of things you know there are people even today that still hold their parents in that same regard how many of you ever heard of chef Muhammad Mustafa and Katie he Muhammad Allah he's the son of the former Mufti Mohammed Amin Ishaan PT a very famous scholar in Medina you know he didn't get married till his 40s because he applied the same thing as imam muhammad r-rahim o allah where he said i'd wait i would not be able to fulfill my rights towards her if i'm married and that's it's not sunnah you don't have to wait but how long he just felt that same that same sense of burden that he did not get married until his mother passed away also how many of you have heard of chefs Ardell Hamdi you know Shahada Lundy has been approached by the Saudi government to become the Imam of the harem twice but he refused both times because his parents live in the Imam and his parents wanted him to stay close to him it's upon Allah we still find even today some of you know these scholars and great personalities that truly put their parents above all and that's really the meaning of this hadith it's not just any typical hadith about the rights of parents it's again putting them before everything else now compare that to you know our our our day and age or where we are today and what we see happening in our communities where someone wants to get married and they're willing to sacrifice the relationship of 20 25 years because of a person that they met two months ago at an MSA and I'm willing to forget about all of that because I want to marry that person and that's it now I'm not saying that sometimes the parents are unjustified justified or unjustified whenever they whenever they stop a person from getting married but the point is again you know just be the complete lack of respect lack of understanding lack of appreciation sometimes really disturbing is how a lot it ties into all of these situations and the beauty of this hadith is that all three of these situations taht are tied in with one another this the second situation which is the one I'm going to cover how many of you are going to college next year sisters mashallah how many of you are already in college how many of you live alone not many of you how many of you plan on living alone I forgot your day see you guys stay living with each other forever you get married and you just bring the wife into the house - I know how it goes but anyway in essence this concept of being alone being unmonitored finally having some privacy finally having some freedom and what we realize sometimes when we go off to college when we go to when we go to our schools and where we're no longer under the eye of our parents what we realized sometimes is that when we were growing up we really didn't have taqwa of Allah we kind of had taqwa love our parents but we didn't have taqwa of Allah because it exposes you because now all of a sudden you're alone all of a sudden you have the chance to disobey allah subhanho into all of a sudden you are your own man you are your own woman and all of these temptations start hitting you from the right and from the left from behind you and from in front of you and a loss of Hanoi Tata exposes either your true taqwa or your lack thereof and this had these by the way by the way why were these three men in the cave in the first place did you guys talk about that okay even Hajj Alaska Lonnie Laurel rocky Mahalo he says that there was a storm there was a storm so it's not like these three guys's went to a cave and started you know having a bonfire something like that and started talking there was a storm that forced these three men into a cave to shelter themselves from the storm and during that storm the stone had moved the rock or the boulder had moved to shut the cave and that's when they started to make this deal to invoke allah subhanaw taala with their good deeds now what you'll notice about this situation the second situation it's unlike the first one why was the first situation about a man who did a good deed or was it about a man who left us in a person who did a good deed okay he did a good deed for his parents this person that I'm talking about right now it's someone who did not do a good deed he just happened to leave us in but he considered it a good deed he considered it a good deed and so did a loss of hi-de-ho Dada because when he made the Duat the boulder did move so that was a sign of acceptance of that and as we as we read this second person also lost ice and I'm says he said oh Allah I had a cousin who was the dearest of all people to me and I wanted to have intercourse with her but she refused later she came across hard times during a year of famine and she came to me and I gave her one hundred and twenty dinars on the condition that she would not resist my desires and she agreed when I was about to fulfill my desires and by the way just for this it's important to sort of show you the depth of the situation the the explanation of this hadith is when he says I was about to it's not that he was talking to her that he was starting no they were already engaged in the act and he was about to take it to the next level he was about to take it to the next level so they were all already laying together just to show you again how intense this was at that moment at that moment she said to me it is illegal for you to violate my chastity except through marriage except through the way that allah subhanaw taala made it permissible he said so I realized it was a sin and I left her and I even had some gold with me that I left for her so the 120 denardis and the gold I left it all over there and I went away understanding that allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala had forbidden this and then he made that there are two Allah subhana Allah o Allah if you know that this was done for your sake please relieve us from this present calamity so anyway we get to this situation number one and there are many things to break down from this hadith if you're not taking notes then you have a problem so number one the fact that this person said twice in the hadith mejia a Habanos Alea she was the most beloved person to me so this was not just some crush that he developed overnight this was not just someone that he found attractive this was someone that he developed feelings for a Hibou Necedah he says this in the beginning and he says this in the end to emphasize I actually had feelings for her she was the most beloved person to me this was not someone that just caught me at one night I was developing my feelings for we were getting closer to each other and I still left it for your sake o Allah many times what happens in these situations again we go off and we have some privacy we start developing a relationship sometimes subconsciously sometimes it comes through an MSA through an organization through ym maybe whatever it is and we start sending Facebook messages to each other and we start adding those little smiley faces all the time and you know we start on we start saying different things we start becoming a little bit more flirtatious we start laughing a little bit more with each other we start developing feelings for each other and it's kind of understood that you know what I'm going to marry you and you're going to marry me now the problem with all of that is that you start talking and you're still you know you're still convincing yourself or rather Shaitaan is telling you look you're not doing anything wrong and having to lie you didn't do this and then when you do that then say thawne says well it could have been a lot worse than having to lie you didn't do that so you know you start talking you start meeting in public maybe with a group of friends then you start meeting alone then you start tapping each other on the shoulder then you start maybe you know touching a little bit but you're not getting completely intimate then you go to the parents you see the problem with the equation here then you go to the parents and you act like nothing ever happened and then the daughter says dad you know this guy wants to marry me what do you think and he says I don't like him he's not Hyderabadi or I don't like him he's not from Philistine or he's not from Karachi or he's not this he's not that or I don't like him he hasn't finished enough of his education then the tragedy starts from there but wait a minute I love him I can't let him go what do you mean is that all isn't that hadith about the Lilly can I find something in the Hanafy filk that says I don't need a woody how can I get around my parents now let me find an imam who's gonna do this marriage let me let me see how I can get around this now you start creating your own filk and customizing your relationship with a lot to conform with a haram relationship that you already established with someone else and then you want to say Islam is not fair why does this Nam say that the parents have this Authority why does Islam say this why does Islam say that why is this happening to me but I love him I love her I can't let it go you shouldn't have developed the relationship in the first place if the equation was proper then you wouldn't have found yourself in the dilemma that you're in and then you say but I can't live without her I can't live without him it's your fault you started it you developed you allowed yourself to develop that relationship so now for the sake of saving your other relationship with allah subhanaw taala and then the second most important relationship with your parents you need to sacrifice the one that is that is that is grabbing your heart at that moment so he allowed himself to develop feelings for her and he didn't stop it at its root now is it permissible in Islam to marry your cousin I know it's gross and disgusting in America because we're Americans and we see it as weird but is it permissible yes so could he have approached this the right way yes but he didn't he allowed the feelings to develop he kept getting close to her and in particular what do you think allowed those feelings to develop more the fact that she was his cousin right let me tell you what happens in some Muslim countries and even here but even in some Muslim countries because we always were always told about how bad we are as American Muslims in some Muslim countries female cousins will not wear hijab even if they are they are regular and with the hedge about in front of their male cousins this is extremely common so the and and it's not just the cloth but the whole you know the rules of modesty the rules that govern a job the situation in the state of hijab when it comes to cousins it's not there it's not there so you know it even though it's permissible people you know this person is just as strange to me as any stranger on the outside from an Islamic standpoint that person is supposed to observe just as much a job in front of you as they are in front of any other man on the street but she's my cousin he's my cousin so you start developing feelings you start getting close to each other oh you're just like my sister and then you've got the whole brother-in-law and sister-in-law thing and this is crucial by the way this is not racism at all and if your desi I can sit myself half desi because I was in a desi community for six years I can't even eat Arab food anymore so don't take any offense to this but this culture this culture of moving the wife in when I've got a brother who's the same who's close to my age and who's going to interact with her without her hijab and without any bounds whatsoever is a destructive culture it's so much so that the Prophet sallallaahu Hardy wasalam said l homme who l Motz the brother-in-law is deaf can you imagine that statement the brother-in-law is death that doesn't mean you should hate your brother-in-law that doesn't mean you should hate your brother-in-law but it's easy to assume well he's like my brother now you know husband and wife start talking she's like my sister he's like my brother now and then you start establishing a relay ship with each other you start you start being more friendly with each other the a job becomes lakhs in front of the brother-in-law now if it's not the clothing of a job just the barriers are blurred there I've seen people that are that are considered to be extremely religious right they'll pose for pictures with their female cousins they'll pose for pictures with their sister-in-laws it's whatever she's my sister he's my brother analyst I said I'm said no he's death why because you know how many times I'm telling you as a mom when I was a mom in New Orleans wallahi how many times I had a situation where a brother-in-law was at home alone with his sister-in-law with his own brother's wife and then one day groped her but they decided to save face in the family not to tell anybody but the but the girl was distraught forever just a few weeks ago when I was visiting a community a girl in full hey job and full jean-bob and I'm talking about her hijab comes down to her wrists she was telling me that her male cousin her male cousin took her to school she's in high school he always used to take her to school and all of a sudden he pulled the call car over and this is a message of goer and she's a message or religious family all of a sudden he pulled the call caught a car over and started to make a move on her but she didn't tell anybody because he threatened her she said if you tell anyone I'm going to tell you no I'm going to tell your dad that you did this and this and this not it'll be my word against yours Shaitaan starts to play in those times but you know how many times whenever the hijab gets blurred you stop understanding or you stop abiding by the limits of allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala so allah allows you to fall into destruction you destroy yourselves everything in the Sharia is for our own good everything in the Chateauguay is for our own good she's like my cousin she's like my sister man she's not my cousin you know that I would never think about marrying her anyway I would never think about anything like that and you know even again the brother-in-law the sister-in-law all of that it all gets blurred and that's a problem that's a problem when you read in the classical books of even brother and sister are supposed to observe certain limits with each other I'm not saying she has to wear a job in front of her brother absolutely not but even brother and sister are not supposed to get too comfortable not supposed to be in the same bed you know even if it's just whatever they're not she's not supposed to dress indecently in front of him right the way that they hug the way they're you would actually find instructions the way that they hug should not be the way that a husband would hug his wife or son would hug his mother because even that can get bad but of course this is something where you have a situation with non-muslims people that are actually prohibited for you but you allow yourself to develop a close relationship with them because the culture does not consider them to be non-model so that's the first thing understand the bounds that Allah subhana Tata has set for you the other thing well here happen oscillate whenever you're developing that feeling don't allow yourself to be alone and halwa don't allow yourself to be alone with that person whether it's physically or whether it's virtually cyber halwa chatting emails text messages whatever it is don't allow yourself to be alone and the scholars say if you have feelings for that person then don't allow yourself to be in their company even if there is no holo whatsoever even if even if there is no seclusion because it's dangerous for you at that point so you need to you need to exercise some boundaries you need to separate yourself from the situation because you are developing you're developing feelings for that person now another thing and this was something that personally one of my one of my scholarship Hamas cop-a-feel Allah I remember back in in one of the conferences and I was a kid so but it was the Maya conference they used to have the Muslim Arab youth of America and they used to bring all before before America used to you know not allow scholars to come here used to have serious or they're not coming from all over the world to this country having major conferences that couldn't be held anywhere in the Muslim world and there was once a Colorado there was once a from the scholars of Maya that a young man because obviously they were addressing a group of immigrants young men that were coming here to start their lives and they were college students that no young man should live alone either he gets married or he gets a roommate because once you're alone Shaitaan can start playing games with you it starts to open the doors for things some of the scholars and I'm not even going to say their names because they're banned now some of the scholars went so far to say that it was Haram that it would be Haram in the situation that we are in now because so many youth were coming from the Muslim world and they were in us in a strict situation all of a sudden now they had this free world and all of a sudden they were opening themselves up to so many different forms of Haram they destroyed themselves so the point is don't allow yourself to be in close contact with that person but the heart of all of this the heart of all of this is the concept of Morocco ba' the concept of being watched of being observed by allah subhana wa ta'ala and knowing that allah subhana wa ta'ala is observing you as imam Kodama rahim alassad and to relieve allah allahu allah book you are observing Allah and Allah is observing you you're observing his presence by worshiping him as if you can see him and he sees you so you are observing him and he's observing you all of a sudden Allah subhana WA Ta'ala created a cover for you Allah created a cover for you all of a sudden now you're off to school you're independent you've got your own car your parents are not giving you curfews you have your own time alone you can be with certain people you can do certain things that were off limits and Shaitaan wants you to experiment it's only natural he wants you to experiment but at that moment you need to make sure that you're observant of Allah subhana Allah that Allah is watching you because the peak of hypocrisy the peak of hypocrisy and the worst of the worst of people in the sight of Allah is the prophets lie so time said is the new attain one who is two-faced one who was two-faced not two-faced in the sense that he tells you one thing and he goes to another person says another thing that you're a totally different person literally you have two faces you have one with your parents and one outside you have one with the messages and one for school now we have multiple faces multiple faces through social networking masha'allah multiple faces you could create five different profiles for yourself okay and span a lot you could portray yourself as something that you are totally not but that shows that you're no longer observing allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala one of the scholars an imam and Kodama he malai narrates that one of the Salif he said that my father taught me that every night before I go to sleep so he kept on increasing this for me he told me to say Allahu Mary Allahu Shahidi Allahu knobbly don't eat a hot tawa jet to Halawa - that my father kept on telling me every night before I go to sleep to say a lot is with me Allah is witnessing me Allah sees me he was implanting in me this concept of maraca ba and he would tell me every single night to say it more and more and more and more until I tasted the sweetness of that till I understood Allah is with me Allahu Mary Allah who shined the ilaha ilallah now they doneall a a lot is uh Allah is witnessing me and that Allah is watching me until I tasted the sweetness of that till I understood when Allah creates you that cover you know one of the scholars one of the poets he said vii the hell out of here Ebert in whenever Darya tanita to Leon and then whenever you find yourself under a cover and the soul the self starts to call you to rebellion then remind yourself in a levy Haleakala Lama yell Ani the one who created darkness the one who created the cover that's on me right now sees me right now the one who created that for me in the first place I had youth that would that would be in the message whenever they're trying to get into med school making your I'm telling you doing aren t calf in the mustard that they pass their MCATs that they're going to get into this med school once they got to med school they started dating they started establishing relationships their parents sent them off masha'Allah now they're in the door and for another time this is whenever I go off on the parents for expecting their kids to remain pure until the age of twenty eight thirty years old without getting into any relationship in this country which i think is absurd and ridiculous so if you're a parents fear allah subhanallah de with your children but it doesn't absolve the children of the responsibility you'll get punished too if you still do it it's just a greater test for you a lot created to cover for you Allah gave you a blessing of going to school Allah gave you a blessing of having a social life and then you use that cover that Allah gave you you use that blessing that Allah gave you to disobey Him so remind yourself the one who created this cover for me in the first place he sees me right now so it's not about who else sees me I know that a loss of Hinata Allah is watching me I know that Allah subhana Tata who gave me if I have Beauty Allah who gave me this beauty Allah subhana Allah is watching me at this point also remember the jealousy of Allah the honor of Allah now I know this one's going to sound really really weird to you all but it's very important jealousy always has a negative connotation in the English language it doesn't always have a negative connotation in the Arabic language a lira lira it's more of honor and dignity because jealousy means you accuse an innocent person in English right and those if any of you take the behind-the-scenes class I go into a long discussion about this the leader of Allah the leader of Allah sorry I didn't talk about all the allahu anhu one time or maybe it was sad even more i forgot which side it was but he was telling the Sahaba he said if I ever caught my wife in the act of zina I would kill her and I would kill the guy with the sharpest part of the sword so the Sahaba came to the Prophet slice on them and they were like this is a little too much isn't it and the prophets like I said I'm said attack abouna lelee dirty side are you amazed are you impressed by the honor of sight and they said yeah no so a lot too much and he said wallah he lonna ugly room in I have more lira than him wallah no meanie and Allah has more Leela than me you know how on all the Hollywood movies you're always you know they always got the girl that's being chased that has the big scary father it keeps the gun or what was that movie what was that movie called with them I hated that movie what was it meet the parents right that was a little psychotic and overboard I only watched the first one but uh you know that whole concept of the scary dad the dad that's going to try to kill you it you know it sort of creates the the rabbit you know the rabbit hunter it sort of creates that chase right that pursuits and guys like that you know running after the girl trying to get around the big scary father well obviously in college and in school when or whenever you're alone you start establishing these relationships it's not in the presence of the father now you act with more a dub you act with more dignity you're a little bit more scared let's say if I told you guys specifically guys that the girl that you're trying to mess with right now her dad owns twenty guns and he's a former Marine and he has a formal he has a former conviction or he killed somebody before I don't care how pretty the girl is you're gonna watch yourself any like no I'm okay I'm sorry are you sure yeah I'm all right stop it Allah you will become you but you will look at your shoes and you be like oh I didn't realize my shoes had some blue on them all of a sudden you're gonna start lowering your gaze you're gonna be scared now what is the messenger of allah so i said i'm telling us so lhasa lala haria sometime is saying even if a woman has no man who has Lia of her Allah has more Lita than any other man and Allah doesn't just own twenty guns a lot owns Hellfire so you better be careful you're overstepping your bounds sisters the same thing happens to because you know what happens with a really jealous that he kills you and he kills the guy so you are offending a loss of Hannah Montana whenever you whenever you make yourself promiscuous or whenever you open yourself up to that relationship II if they don't have a man who's going to be a real man Allah subhana WA Ta'ala has more later than any man we ask Allah span taught to protect us and that's why the Imam had been setting rahim allah he said i used to see a woman in my dream ala moana holla - Hillel II and I know that she was not halal for me now here's the thing in your dream I'm gonna give you guys a shimmer of hope if you see something in your dream it's okay that doesn't mean that you can sit there before you sleep and try to think about somebody until you can dream about her or sisters you can't do the same thing alright you can't just sit there and dream about the guy until you think of him and then you have a dream or whatever it is about that person but if you have a dream about a person you don't have to lower your gaze in your dream enjoy your dream okay enjoy it you don't have to lower your gaze and you probably want because you're in a dream anywhere you're not thinking about had on Haram and those types of things in that situation but Imam even seen rahim allah he says that i used to see a woman in my dream when wanna holla - hello Lea and I know that she's not halal for me for us three full baths sorry so I lower my gaze I would take my gaze away from her even in my dream span Allah you developed that strong sense of allah is watching me right now I'm shy I'm ashamed I'm shy I'm ashamed I'm scared if you need to make yourself fear a lot more and think of Hellfire more think of Hellfire more I am scared of Allah soprano it's Ana of offending allah subhana wa ta'ala of going over the boundaries that allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala has created for me an imam hassan or bussy rahim allah he says something very powerful he says that and this he says you know he gives us the scenario again allah creates for you a cover this man is alone with her now he has the full opportunity to do what he has to do an imam hasan abbas al rahim o Allah he said that a thief whenever he's robbing a house and he hears the doorknob rattle or he hears the door starting to open what does he do he runs and he hides he runs any hives okay and he says at that moment the thief went from committing an action of theft to committing an act of shidduch he didn't become a catheter he committed an act of disbelief why because Allah was watching him the whole time and he only got scared when the doorknob started to rattle that's when you know you're being a complete hypocrite when you're on your computer and then when you think someone's coming close by you need to start minimizing your windows that's when you know something is wrong when you're afraid of the gaze and you're afraid of the the sight of people you're afraid of other people seeing you Allah is watching you the whole time and that kills your heart what's worse a public center a private sin what's worse a public sin right but also lost Ison I'm sad that Allah would forgive a person on the day of judgement a believer for everything except for the sins that he made public that he boasted about why because you're proud of it you're proud of it it's it's a shy Bonnie type of attribute satanic right you go out there and you tell people hey you know what I did last night I was talking to this girl and I was talking to this now it's safe Bonnie it's satanic in its nature but the scholars of Tusker they say that the ones that kill the heart more and that hinder your spiritual progress more are the secret sins and that's why the imam ahmed rahim allah he said in a very famous poem even alcohol Adira be a mistake our Cellini Mutulu thumb ban honky wobble siani tattini I'm afraid that my Lord will tell me on the day of judgment weren't you ashamed of disobeying me and hiding the sin from my creation my lowly creation and with your disobedience coming to me flaunting to me it hinders your spiritual progress more why because it increases your two-facedness it increases your hypocrisy it kills the sense of Morocco you purposely try to ignore allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala I remember when John Edwards did what he did and he got caught he did what he did many times and but then when he got caught I remember Newsweek or Time magazine did it in a paper or did in an edition on the psychology of a cheater the psychology of a cheater and in essence when a person is tea on his wife or when a person is trying to cheat on whatever it is when a person is trying to have an affair what do they do they try to ignore every portion of reality that they possibly can think about it when a person's cheating they don't sit there and take out their phone and say hey check out this picture of my kids yeah she's - she's pretty isn't she and if his wife calls he's not going to answer the phone and just talk normally what's that person going to do he's going to turn his cell phone off he's going to hide his wallet he's going to hide the pictures of his kids he's going to try to ignore the consequences of his actions he's going to try to ignore reality so in essence whenever we cheat on a loss of hano it's a de on our relationship with allah subhanahu wata'ala we do the same thing we try to ignore the circumstances we try to ignore the consequences of the sin we try to ignore reality we try to pretend he's not there if I close my eyes enough maybe I can pretend he's not there but he's there and he's watching you and he created that cover for you and he knows what you're doing under that cover and it's more offensive to him subhanahu wa'ta'ala when you have the audacity to sin with that major sin with that great sin just because his lowly creation is not watching you at that moment when you go off and you find your time alone when you're on your computer and you have your time alone when you're on your phone and you have your time alone know that allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala knows what all of your text messages look like and even if you delete your cookies in your history online allah subhana wa ta'ala knows what they were you're not fooling allah you're not fooling a lot the last thing that I want to come to I want to end it on a positive note because all of you look scared right now I want to end it on a positive note Allah Subhanahu WA Ta'ala rewarded this person who was in the act of committing zina and had there not been children in here I would be a little bit more explicit as the scholars of hadith were but I won't but he was right there he was in the process and he held himself at that moment and he left act for that you get rewarded think about that think about the mercy of allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala for that you get rewarded right and then we look at the famous hadith of the messenger sallallaahu writing you a Selim where he says that if a person makes a good intention and follows it up with a good action then how many times is he rewarded he's ten times and that's not too bad Ashley I'm Fatiha 10 times the reward so Allah multiplies the good deed if he makes a good intention but he doesn't fulfill it with he doesn't follow up with action what does Allah give him he still gives him a good deed I'm at well you had a good intention Allah writes down for you the good deed as if you performed it as if you did the good deed Allah just won't multiply it for you if a person sins and he follows if a person has the intention of doing something bad and he does the bad what does it lost pantai right for him just once him if a person has the intention to sin but doesn't follow it up with an act of sin what is the loss of Hanna Tata right for him see some of you said nothing Allah writes for him a good deed how crazy is that span Allah and I mean crazy and like awesome crazy I don't mean crazy like in June I mean crate like Wow human beings can't even fathom that right that's like somebody coming to your house with a baseball bat about to bust up your car I don't know if any of you know Britney Spears or if you had some relationship with her in the past but apparently she likes to beat up cars with a baseball bat so anyway she shows up to your houses or not she let's say a person shows up to your house of the baseball bat is about to bust up your car and then says you know what no and then goes and knocks on the door says hey Muhammad you know I just wanted to let you know I was I was really upset about the conversation we had last night about all that trash talk about the set for 76ers in the Celtics so I decided to come to your house and bust up your car but I'm sorry now Muhammad if he's a good guy he just says okay so that Michael closes the door he's a good guy he's a normal guy he calls the police and says there's a guy with a baseball bat on my premises that came to bust up my car but if he's a Morrison if he's one who excels well actually that's not even that's that's even human Exxon doesn't fathom this doesn't you know doesn't encompass this you imagine if Mohammed says oh man that's okay here how much gas did you spend coming here let me pay you for the gas and you know how much did you buy that baseball bat for I'll buy your bat too like whoa thanks man that's if that's not even human right but that's Allah it's not human but that's Allah Allah would actually give you a good deed because you were about to do something offensive to him you were engaging in the sin and then you held yourself and you stopped Allah gives you a good deed for that span Allah and that's why on the day of judgment one of the men and one of the people in the category of those who are shaded by the shade of allah subhanahu wata'ala when on the day when there is no other shade amongst a just ruler right imagine a just ruler someone who grew up in the masjid attached to the masjid amongst this high category of people you have a person Raja loaned out to em Radha has a Ben Wedeman for Karla India HOF Allah a person who was approached by a woman of status and beauty and it applies to sisters - not with sisters but with brothers okay and said I fear Allah I'm afraid of Allah I'm afraid of Allah I fear Allah not any attack Allah know sometimes you need to scare yourself you need to remember that Allah owns Hellfire that I'm offending the one who holds my destiny in his hands and can put me in Hellfire I fear Allah I'm holding myself back and for that Allah gave him that elite company the company of the Shahada the martyrs and the Saudi people and the truthful and the prophets Allah gave him that status and that honor because he held himself back he stopped now obviously you don't want to put yourself in a situation you don't want to put yourself in a situation where you're going to get anywhere close to Xena and that's why I lost prancercise well takubo Xena don't come close to it don't get yourself started you know don't don't ruin yourself don't get yourself in the relationship and then try to go to your parents and try to make it all halal and try to make people kick it under the rug Allah is gonna get you Allah is going to get you if you offend the law Allah will get you unless you repent and the only way to sincerely repent is to leave it but what if you're already engaged in a relationship what if you've already put yourself in that danger zone what do you do I'm going to end on this one story and this is in the tafseer of Adam and Ben cathedra he mahalo of so lroff verse number 201 verse number 201 of sorted out off an imam even cathy rahim allah titles this shaaban yet to had death min al kaba a young man who spoke from his grave an imam even Cathy r-rahim o Allah he narrates that there was a young man mulazim will message it who was always in the masjid lintel lob Ameer al-mumineen American hot tub from the students of non other than American khattab radhi'allahu Don Ho he used to sit in all of the halaqaat he used to keep the company of America Pablo de la Isla anhu and his father was a shape and when they say his father was a sheikh meaning he was an old man not a Shaykh has in a scholar and old man an old man but Subhan Allah so and the reason why these narrations would make it a point to mention that is because you know he was a person that had a level of Independence his father was dependent on him so he was a poly Balaam he was a student of knowledge he had the presence of Amarillo hot Bob he had you know he was always in the Masjid and then one day on his way home there was a woman that was calling him to her home she was a beautiful woman and he fell for it and that shows you by the way just because you're religious doesn't mean that you're not going to fall for these things sometimes you might fall for them it's not about if you fall for them or it's not about how you fall for them or if you fall for them it's about how quickly you get yourself out of the situation so he followed her to her home as he walked behind her as she invited him into her home as he walked behind her tada Caracalla he remembered the words of allah subhanallah de and this is the ayah number 201 of certain are off in el Adina taco Edom s Siham pas Yvonne - a pawn teducker over either mobile siren those who truly are conscious of their Lord either must employ form in a shape on if they are tempted by a little touch of the seitan and again it shows you that you're never absolved don't feel bad if you fell for this once or twice don't feel bad it's about how you get yourself out right now I know some of you are in these relationships right now religious or non-religious saipan got you he touched you he tempted you he got to you for a moment he staggered you he got you off your feet and he was following this woman to her house and he remembered this ayah Allah subhana Tata says at that moment to that kuru they remember Allah for either home mobile saloon so now all of a sudden they can see you know bustle and Becerra are two different things but he can see right now but he can't see he doesn't understand what's he's not really seeing like some of you are looking at me right now but you have no idea what I'm talking about and some of you are extracting things from the words that I'm saying that even I can't extract because the prophets lysozyme said that sometimes the listener Gainsborough understand something more than the speaker some of you because of your boss Lida because of your attentiveness because your insight you're getting things from this lecture that even I'm not getting so lost montage says Fett either huh mobile say don't so he's following along then all of a sudden what am i doing stuff it Allah he passed out he passed out and the woman shut the door on him and she left him sleeping in front of her door he woke up and he started to cry and he went to his father and he told his father what he did and his father said and he was crying when he was talking to his dad he said I can't believe I did this and he was shivering out of the fear of allah subhanaw taala he didn't do it he just was about to do it but he caught himself and his father said to him yeah Bonet oh my son what did you say you know that made you stop and he recited the ayah again to his father and then he fell and he died he fell in he died and this was a student of Amon relief otavalo the allahu anhu so I wanted me to her table understood what happened Bob knew what happened and they prayed Jenna's on him that night and Amna Kitab went and he sat next to him while the people were while the people were there after the janazah after they buried him a nominal authority allow and who talking to a student imagine what a what a humiliating way right what a humiliating way for my student to go out this was a poly a student of knowledge to the one who the prophets I said I'm said if there was to be a prophet after me it would have been all Martin he was Mahadev spoken to by the angels he was a student of him not a student of Oh mr. Damon or a student of Abdul Nassir share of the nasir jangda Imam so hey Bob he was a student of Allah Rahab and all her thought was heartbroken so how mental table sat next to his grave and he said yeah Fatah Oh young man what a man hath Amukamara bahijon 'not on and for the one who feared the power of his lord is two guardians and the young man spoke from his grave a miracle from allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala and he said a job in Fatah colony hey ya omar omar latane allah has given it to me Oh Omar twice model attained some of the scholars he said twice because the time he held himself back from the fear of Allah and then the other time when he was speaking to his father he got fearful again and he passed out again Allah gave me four Gardens instead of two why I helped myself so if you're in that relationship right now or if you're thinking about getting in that relationship or if you think that Allah has created a cover for you so you can do whatever you want allah subhanaw taala sees you Allah is the one who created the cover for you in the first place but don't lose hope even the student of Alma got lost don't lose hope just pick yourself up before it gets worse before you end up losing your parents your reputation destroying your future prospects of a halal marriage get all of that out the way stop it now yes you will feel the hurts because you might have developed a true love for that person this man when he's talking to Allah he makes it a point to say to this to a loss of Hannah to Anna twice well he ahah Benassi Alea oh Allah I love her I love her you know how much I love her she's the most beloved person to me in the world but I left her for you I knew it didn't start on the right foot and for those of you that are wondering well if I'm in this relationship can't I just make it halal now can I just make it halal now and I want to tell you that nothing that starts with offending allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala will become blessed by allah subhanallah de in that way unless there's a sincere repentance in the within them in the way now what i mean by that you know it's let me put it to you this way if you were to bring a girl home her sister's if you were to bring a brother home and the first thing that person did was curse your mother out and throw a shoe at her it doesn't matter how many cards he brings and how many flowers he brings you threw a shoe at me you cursed me out I remember now a loss of Hannah - Allah forgives and a loss of hands I'll accept sincere repentance but what is sincere repentance at that moment what is sincere repentance when you're engaged in that relationship what is it to leave that relationship that relationship is a sin not to say Oh al I'm in this relationship can you make it holla now that's like you know subhanAllah there's an expression in Arabic that you know you fix someone's hot and then you slap him and the Hat goes to the side and then you try to fix the Hat again you can't do that with a lot l of course LASIK committed he say but I'm saying it's offensive it's like you would offend a human being like I'm still engaged not willing to leave this Haram so can you make this Haram halal for me no that's not sincere repentance sincere repentance is I can't talk to you anymore I know I have love for this person but look I can't talk to you anymore and then while you're alone oh Allah forgive me and then if a loss of hannahsz Allah forgives you and then maybe later on down the line after you've really wood drew yourself from that then maybe it can work out if it starts off the halal way again if you come through the front door now go through the proper channels go through the proper means maybe then it will work out but don't try to don't try to play that game with Allah spanner to Allah you know I'll give you a fifty correlation of that in Islam so agita heel is haram Tahil is basically if a woman has been divorced three times a man and woman were divorced three times then they cannot be together anymore unless unless the woman was to get married and was to become intimate with her husband and then divorce him too because that means that that's a woman that probably has some serious issues with marriage so fine it wasn't it wasn't you it wasn't about the compatibility of you and her or her and you it was that you know you guys just aren't very good marriage material so maybe you deserve each other but in Islam it's Haram for a woman to say Oh wal I've been divorced three times let me go have a paper marriage just so I can say I was married again so I can come back to my old husband and say hey we're married again why cuz it wasn't real it's artificial it's superficial it's on paper so for you to have a lot bless your relationship you need to leave that relationship and you need to seek forgiveness from Allah repair your relationship with him and repair your relationship with your parents and then if later on down the line if one year when you're when your mind has become free of those impurities from those thoughts you think to yourself that's the best person for me in my Deen then you go through the proper channels and may Allah subhanAllah to help you all because it's tough I know may Allah help you all because it's tough I mean that from the bottom of my heart I really feel for you and I understand that our cultures just suck when it comes to this let's face it but that's a lot testing you a little bit more take the test in sha Allah and with any test when you pass the test it's that much sweeter it's that much sweeter wallah take you a few more years to get married but once you get married and that's the only person you've ever shared your secrets with that's the only person you got close to it's that much sweeter it's that much sweeter it's not Jenna because some of you are like wow that's Jenna it's not Jenna Jenna is even sweeter than that because even after you get married you'll still have issues not with not necessarily with her you will have issues with her and you will have issues with him but life will still be a test and that's what makes Jenna so sweet you struggled for you toiled for it does that be ma kuntum tat maroon this is a reward for that what you used to do that's what Jenna is so when you get married it's a little minor Jenna for the first year second year is kind of bad sometimes I'm just playing male lust cantata bless you all in sha allah may allah subhanaw taala allow us all to have good pure religious spouses inshaallah who better us in dunya and then Dean everyone say I mean may Allah subhana WA Ta'ala not allow our marriages to come in the way of our relationships with our parents may Allah soprano Dada not allow our relationships to come in the way of our relationship with Allah may Allah Subhanahu WA Ta'ala allow us to be amongst those who love and who hate only for his sake Ilana I mean does our Kamala here on Oahu locally hasta la allakum assalaam ani come on supplying acacho

Channel: Young Muslims

Views: 338,392

Rating: 4.9087811 out of 5

Keywords: Imam Omar Suleiman, Youth Conference 2012, Youth Conference, Group, Anjum, International Forum, Young Muslims, Muslim (Adherents), Meeting, islam, Muslim, Quran, Islam (Religion), Religion (Literary Genre), Youth, Blueprint for a Lasting Legacy, SWOT, Dr Anjum, Allah, Conference, punishment, America, USA, YM, ICNA, NAK, ANJ, intensive, Analysis, Allah (Deity)

Id: XfUZknCITnc

Length: 50min 37sec (3037 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 30 2012

Reddit Comments

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[u/Sahih__Bukkake]

Mashallah, he compares Allah to a violent, unstable, aggressive father.

[u/moneybones3000]

Damn, I wondered why honour killings are so prevalent in many Islamic societies. After realizing that this is the most liberal scholar of Islam saying these things, I’m not surprised anymore

[u/sawalm]

Also they use " this is culture " when clearly according to the video people at Mohammed time said " this is too much " but he himself didn't.

[u/PM_ME_UR_MATH_JOKES]

Transcript:

[R]emember the jealousy of Allah, the honor of Allah, and I know this one's gonna sound really, really weird to you all, but it's very important:

Jealousy always has a negative connotation in the English language; it doesn't always have a negative connotation in the Arabic language:

الغيرة‎; الغيرة‎.

It's more of honor and dignity. Because jealousy means you accuse an innocent person in English, right? And those—if any of you take the Behind the Scenes class, I go into a long discussion about this.

The غيرة‎ of Allah; the غيرة‎ of Allah.

Sa`d ibn `Ubādah, رضي الله عنه, one time—or maybe it was Sa`d ibn Mu`að, I forgot which Sa`d it was, but—he was telling the صحابة, he said:

If I ever caught my wife in the act of زناء, I would kill her, and I would kill the guy with the sharpest part of the sword.

So the صحابة came to the Prophet, صلى الله عليه وسلم, and they were like:

This is a little too much, isn't it?

And the Prophet, صلى الله عليه وسلم, said:

أتعجبون من غيرة سعد؟

Are you amazed, are you impressed by the honor of Sa`d?

And they said:

يا رسول الله, it's too much!

And he said:

.والله لأنا أغير منه

I have more غيرة than him.

.والله أغير مني

And Allah has more غيرة than me.

Supplementary links:

• Wikipedia entry on غيرة‎

• Wiktionary entry of غيرة‎

• Saḥīḥ Muslim 1499a