Everything Wrong With CinemaSins: The ENTIRE Avengers Infinity Saga

[Music] this is a tesseract and that's pretty much all you'll ever know for sure about it hmm some of us are actually comic book fans so we understood that this was the cosmic cube that thanos was after in the books what we didn't know is that the mcu would turn this into the damn space gym a little later for no reason at all but yeah your sin is wrong bro secret military research facility on brightly lit exposed mesa this implies that those they're keeping this a secret from would even be able to access this facility you said it yourself it's on a mesa mesas are notoriously difficult to reach due to how isolated they are cinemasense has never seen cowboys of mu mesa helicopters do not need to follow roadways i'm not sure the movie is saying that like at all actually the film shows that the landing pad is directly up this path so what it's actually showing is that it's simply about to land coulson wears sunglasses at night i've never understood this weird obsession with calling out people wearing glasses at night or inside a building shades are just as much for personal style as they are for blocking out light i mean you can still see while wearing shades at night and it's not like he needs them for this bright scene or anything nick fury's character development literally begins and ends with ipad what does that even mean fury is a character that has existed since 1963 and the ultimate version of nick fury who this character is based on has been a thing since 2001. not to mention the mcu's version of nick fury was in other movies before this one where his character was more thoroughly explored notably iron man 2. heck even if you want to say you don't know much about him isn't that the point of a spy exciting superhero movie starts with plotting exposition the one thing you failed to do in these videos is explain to us why exposition is bad you have a blanket ban on exposition but then other times you ask for it so there must be some criteria in which exposition is required or at the very least acceptable considering you don't make a distinction at all possibly racist movie kills two asian extras in a row i think it would be more racist to suggest that asian actors can't be killed simply because they're asian what you're doing is pointing out their otherness and what the movie is doing is treating everyone the same by killing everyone that's kind of my argument for silly things like suggesting movies like total recall are sexist because they dared to kill women in the film in the scene everyone says this about there are five men killed to three women the implication is that only the men should be killed in that scene and that's sexist same logic applies here tesseract powers allow for mind control by tapping the center of the chest that's because the movie is suggesting this is a change of heart it's similar to how people describe love as being in the heart when it's actually in the brain it's metaphorical is what i'm saying dangerous energy source space doorway with gamma radiation screw it transport by hand says this while showing he's actually transporting it with this briefcase also what the heck is this symbol that doesn't look like any nine i've ever heard of the bulletproof vest fake out yeah but isn't this the point of a bulletproof vest scene does not contain a laptop that's sexist bruce banner is hiding out where only little girls and shield can find it i have no clue why cinemasins believes this is a sin if he's asking why can shield find him the film implies that they've always kept tabs on him and the little girl knows of bruce because he's been helping people as a doctor here so where is the sin shield answers to four people on vertical plasma screens those look like lcds but that's besides the point this is the world security council a joint international body that oversees the internationally operating shield what did you think shield was autonomous that's like asking why does mi6 answer to parliament loki scepter is also a space phone well considering it's one of the immensely powerful soul gems that you just saw reduce hawkeye to a flying monkey yeah i think trying to reduce it to something as primitive as a space phone is really sinful the helicarrier is hella stupid oh i was waiting for an explanation why this was stupid typically when someone says something is stupid they give a reason like when i refer to your series as stupid i have a bevy of evidence for that claim cloaking device is dumb but i also don't know why they're hiding so you think a clandestine organization being clandestine is dumb gotcha cap pays off a bet he never technically accepted if they're showing him paying the bet then this is the confirmation that he did accept it we're sweeping every wirelessly accessible camera on the planet considering the context of the bet in the previous scene i find this painfully ironic i mean this is a series that has up to this point depicted physically impossible rage monsters that gain mass out of nowhere and literal magic a futuristic organization being able to access cameras as pedestrian in comparison hell the cia were doing that in real life ever heard of edward snowden uh ladies and gentlemen if you will look right here okay you know you're on an airplane and the flight attendant asked you to turn your cell phone off and you're like i ain't turning myself on off that's all i'm going to do with no damn airplane well this is what we get that's what happens it gets up there bounces around on the satellites and bam just turn your damn cell phone off now you're gonna drive off a cliff tonight cause your gps don't work loki makes grand appearance changes that barely changes appear cinemasins thinks this looks barely different than this did he just jump from a plane yes he did i know you made this video in 2012 but here in 2014 it's clearly a thing with him as seen in this year's biggest hit winter soldier marvel's never going to make anything bigger than this especially since they don't own spiderman late night kidnap brotherly argument on a mountain another sin pointing out something we can all see on the screen i really should make a cliche for that superhero pissing contest sinning iron man vs thor vs cap that's worth these many sins superhero pissing contest number two sinning iron man vs thor vs cap vs hulk versus fury vs black widow vs the mind gem that's worth these many sins cap and iron man almost kiss jeremy has pissed off all the shippers i i mean that's homophobic mighty helicarrier basically neutered by one freaking arrow well yeah that's hawkeye and his trick arrows i mean you said that like that arrow didn't cause a massive explosion about a third the size of one of the turbines computer virus delivered by arrow i think the real sin here is your incessant questioning about why hawkeye is one of the avengers but you completely ignore these scenes showing his deadly accuracy in these incredible trick arrows imagine if they ever adapt kate bishop and the shenanigans she and hawk guy will get up to might even make a mini-series out of it where the last episode ends up being trash but the journey was fun for a super soldier captain america is a terrible shot well yeah he's not hawkeye besides he's on a falling out of the air helicarrier shooting an automatic weapon with recoil give the old man a break loki trick store with the old lucy charlie brown football practice jeremy says this as if that's not surprising every single time you watch he'll get the next one i just got a feeling active long boring fight scene between characters we are already trying not to hate oof what a take natasha and clint are beloved characters in the actual fandom and they are far more interesting than you give them credit for in a world where superpowered people aliens and techno suits abound these two keep up with only their training and the physical attributes of a human isn't that why you morons like batman fury gives intimidating death stare to a computer screen intimidating death stare that's racist dying person can finish their last profound statement before dying cliche oh i'm sorry is death inconvenient for you bad news negates the need for medical care ah so death is inconvenient for you cap gets aids from handling bloody baseball cards jeremy implies coulson had aids for literally no reason at all besides you wouldn't get aids you get hiv the virus potentially causes the disease does anyone know anything about viruses basically indestructible heroes still need lily pep talk to get up for the big challenge none of the avengers are indestructible okay hope might be but he's not even here listening to this thor has trouble picking up his hammer but it's never explained no that's absolutely not what this scene is and you are just making things up at this point this scene is meant to show thor being reflective of his brash actions that allowed loki to escape and his near-death experience a few moments ago what he's doing is gathering himself wondering if he is still worthy every gadget in this movie has to glow with a blue light jeremy is a blood loki patiently waits for iron man to remove the damaged suit grab a drink banter a bit and then put on a new suit instead of just killing it it's called arrogance something you display every time you think you can point out the flaws in a movie too bad loki's mind control powers only work if the scepter touches the exact center of a person's chest loki could theoretically touch any part of someone's body to mind control them he like professional shooters aim for center mass because it's an easier target to hit the problem was that loki was unaware of stark's arc reactor protecting his heart generic bad guy soldiers whose abilities and shortcomings are never explained it's almost like movies show you things rather than tell you them most of the time what i find ironic here though is that earlier you lamented the film's plotting exposition why wouldn't the film explaining these aliens abilities be plotting exposition and what excuse would you give for not sinning this one like the one you did earlier why are they even trying to stop an army that we never want to see kill or injure a human being so what you're saying is these guys weren't killed or injured damn they should be on the avengers captain america is really more of a super gymnast than a superhero i love when batman fanboys make arguments against batman and don't realize it besides you were saying i need men in those buildings lead the people down and away from the streets we're gonna set up a perimeter all the way down to 39th street black widow knows exactly how to handle and fire an alien weapon seconds after picking it up and you would think you'd start showing her some goddamn respect after she and hawkeye demonstrates badassery but you're you production design 101 don't imitate anything from transformers i'm going to need someone to explain to me how this looks like the damn transformers it's a giant worm with armor and he's comparing it to sentient robots help hulk can suddenly control his powers because the story demands except it isn't suddenly because they showed hulk has the ability to control his transformation at the end of the incredible hulk it's almost like when marvel recasts a character people's brains lose their ability to function hope no one dies before the mcu is over could be a royal show loki gets caught monologue cinemasins sends this scene that's worth these many sins nick fury fires a missile at an american to stop him from firing a missile in america this logic contradicts your previous logic in this sin council would rather definitely kill everyone in new york with a nuclear weapon then maybe have some die in an alien invasion there is no gravity in space but iron man falls back to earth anyway there is no gravity in space oh we are going to have fun with this one in the future just answer me this one question if there's no gravity in space where do you think gravity exists on earth you know earth is in space right right credit scene to tease the next movie turns out to be homework assignment this man doesn't know who thanos is how are you even qualified to make these videos well the bright side is there's no way you can keep getting away with making these too much longer people on youtube are very intelligent and they pick up on bs fairly quickly i have faith in internet discourse is what i'm saying marvel's officially full of themselves subjects audience to 30 second logo marvel's flipbook logo is one of the greatest of all time logos this would be a legit sin if you were referring to dr strange's opening logo in order for you to know why the avengers are here you needed to watch agents of shield which i have neither the time nor the patients to sit through so i can understand a movie you absolutely do not need to watch agents of shield to understand this scene they clearly explain what it is they're trying to accomplish like multiple times also a movie makes me do research so that i can figure out agent coulson is behind this avengers op which is confusing because he died in the last avengers movie or did he this is very misleading coulson only exists in the tv universe currently same as daredevil or jessica jones they haven't referenced him in the film since he died in the avengers and kevin feige has been adamant that for all intents and purposes coulson is dead to the film series until captain marvel of course here's thor doing what he does best punching and kicking dudes here's jeremy doing what he does best pointing things out on the screen and treating them as if they're sins glorious shot of all the avengers in one frame is absolutely ruined by the complete and total pointlessness of this opening battle first of all this scene isn't pointless it sets up the maximoff twins because otherwise you'd be crying about how they don't establish these characters and if you knew that this scene was set up by agents of shield then you'd know why they were here and what they're trying to accomplish so jeremy fain's ignorance cliche language swear please this coming from the [ __ ] that [ __ ] censors his swear words on damn youtube [ __ ] i mean who the [ __ ] does this stupid sh no one else is gonna deal with the fact that cap just said language just goes to show how horrible hydra is or more how good the heroes are that they can endlessly crack jokes during these battles i would say it's more to do with how the mcu was portrayed as a comedic series at this point i mean people were getting their asses handed to them in infinity war but they were still cracking jokes concentrate fire on the weak once this is precisely why the avengers shouldn't have any weak ones aka black widow and hawkeye you like von strucker here are making the mistake of thinking black widow and hawkeye are weak in any capacity you don't need superpowers to be strong just ask batman fanboys i agree something along that line we have an enhanced in the field and then that's all we ever see of quicksilver during the entire battle well that's [ __ ] considering you skipped his scene with hawkeye right before this [Music] you didn't see that coming yay indeed yay and all you have to do is randomly push some part of the wall and it opens except it wasn't random and if you'd shown this scene to your audience they would understand that you're flat out lying to them hey jay give me an ir scan of the room real quick i'm reading steel reinforcement and an air current please be secret please please be a secret hey big guy this movie suggests that between the last film and this one black widow figured out some magical interpersonal hand wiping connection with the hulk she can exploit to get hulk back to banner status which is some [ __ ] in a universe with sentient robots talking raccoons and mutant i mean enhanced individuals why is it so hard to believe that the avengers could develop post-hypnotic therapy for their most destructive personality also a girl who has been experimented on and held captive decides to defend those who experimented on her and held her captive again you're being very misleading here they're not protecting von strucker and in fact volunteered for these experiments before tony became iron man wanda and pietro were victims of stark's military weapons this made them hate tony and by extension the avengers does anyone else find it unnerving that these two played husband and wife the last time we saw them now they're twins that's kind of creepy right only if you're 13 years old i guess also here's a list of actors who've played siblings and lovers rose mcgowan and david arquette bill hader and kristen wiig tony collette and steve carell paul rudd and elizabeth banks multiple times will arnett and amy paul [Music] well damn beats is even showing up in the maria callous music videos damn jeremy and the movie makes a pop culture reference but since i don't send movies you've been after this thing since shield collapsed but why wasn't loki's scepter on top of the stark tower at the end of the last movie did none of you go and get it i don't watch your damn tv show so why can't you at least explain how the [ __ ] scepter got into the wrong hands again for us movie fans huh this play is so much more ironic now that tv sins exists so this is a sin for the fact that tv sins exists i will never see this building as anything other than a blue jay who cares that's not a problem with the film that's a problem with your weird ass perspective on things besides it looks more like a cassowary he's fast and she's weird movie thinks the throwaway punch line will make me forget it does nothing to explain scarlet witch's abilities but movie is wrong the movies have not explained how [ __ ] gamma radiation causes bruce banner to become the hulk and you seem to be cool with that also you don't have to lie to get your point across agent hill clearly attempted to explain their abilities in this very scene their abilities he's got increased metabolism and improved thermal homeostasis her thing is neuroelectric interfacing telekinesis mental manipulation he's fast and she's weird well there goes the end of iron man 3 and the promise to destroy all the suits i guess since pepper isn't in this movie she can't object if she were she probably wouldn't object either because those aren't suits they're robots what if next time aliens roll up to the club and they will they couldn't get past the bouncer well do they have suitable fake ids oh come on one of this movie's biggest flaws is having tony stark behaving as though he can create artificial intelligence without it instantly going rogue against humanity so tony has never seen terminator or the matrix i don't think you've seen the matrix or at least understood it the machines initially tried living harmoniously with humanity but the humans decided to wait why am i explaining the matrix when i could just sing bird man this is a remaster you've already seen the matrix reloaded so this gag doesn't really work as well as it did the first time okay moving right along you find a place in brooklyn yet i don't think i can afford a place in brooklyn wait you're a celebrity working in a highly funded secret government agency and you can't afford a place in brooklyn are they paying you in 1940s money this is a tongue-in-cheek reference to the gentrification of brooklyn you mentioned in your civil war video i'm pretty sure captain [ __ ] america can live anywhere he damn well pleases neither was omaha beach blondie stop trying to scare us in this movie's unwarranted stanley cameo stanley will play one of the guys that storm normandy because of course he will there's quite a few things i want to say about this especially after making the infinity war video but i'll keep it short and sweet [ __ ] you jeremy now we won't see him anymore and i'm sure that will make your twisted ass happy 20 cents he gets a laugh at a banner trying to lift thor's hammer but dodge's geek orgasm question of what would happen if banner were in full-on hulk mode while trying to lift it they've literally already shown this [Music] the hulk cannot pick up mojoler oh and for the intelligent people that didn't realize i was making a joke calling it mojoler in the original video yeah this sins for you and widow oh no no that's not a question i need answered thank god my sexual fantasies would have taken a huge hit if she did that's dangerously close to jeremy says boner so i'll do five cents instead of the usual ten see i'm nice ish also why did he pick the damaged suit to download into when there were plenty of perfectly good suits to do that presumably because the damaged unit no longer had a working iron legion protocol making it easy for ultron to upload himself also these are not suits you can clearly see that there's no space to fit a human inside the damaged ultron suit i mean unit god damn it you even have me doing it wait so one wallop from cap shield and these iron legion bots explode into bits are you telling me tony stark built a fleet of [ __ ] bots literally in a previous sin you made the claim that these bots are indestructible thinks that mere guns can shoot down these indestructible iron suits but now when presented with evidence they are not indestructible you not only refuse to omit the previous sin but now claim their [ __ ] bots also cap's shield is one of the most powerful objects in the marvel universe what the hell did you think cap was throwing that ass in a circle [Music] ultron is in the cloud yes because this random [ __ ] is a sin of this movie ultron cleared out used the internet as an escape hatch he used the what to what now he used the internet as an escape hatch in old ass man speak he used the internet as an escape hatch wait why the f don't you understand this again you may have forgotten during that confusing battle that rhodes was hit with ultron's pulse bolt crashed through a window and fell about 50 feet into a metal walkway down below but sure he's just got an algae on his shoulder the real sin is you didn't point out he's holding the wrong shoulder in the first place he fell on his left but is holding his right the cinemasins of old would have picked that up but now you're all about 20 minute videos and lame dad jokes u-s-a-u-s-a but i saw stark's fear i knew it would control him make himself distraught it might have been easier to just kill him but the psychology experiment is a lot more fun you know i could be petty and just point out all the things that i satirize in the infinity war video that jeremy always does like when i kept stating that thanos should have just killed everyone kind of like how he's stating that scarlet witch should have done here but i won't do that but you just did smaller people children i lost the word there right because an ai robot would somehow forget the word children in the midst of planning a worldwide annihilation wait what was that worldwide annihilation one more time annihilation another annihilation [Music] this is the point of the script that every bad guy needs to pass on some sort of trivial knowledge to the maximoff twins so they can win slumdog millionaire i guess you mean who wants to be a millionaire slumdog millionaire is a movie you'd think a channel named cinemasins would get that you'd be wrong the guy with this gun clearly has no chance to kill ultron but scarlet witch is there to stop him just so it seems she's not completely useless yeah but which isn't impervious to bullets and neither is quicksilver as the end of this movie can attest oh we need something for black widow to do um i know send in a bunch of evil human soldiers right now oh [ __ ] we need to send to pat the run time on this 19 minute video um i know let's talk about black widow negatively because that will always make people laugh comedy does thor see quicksilver is that why he throws the hammer here also the one guy with superpowers who clearly doesn't need any help decides yeah i need thor's hammer let's do this the one guy with superpowers that kind of suggests that he's the only one here with superpowers and thor is literally in this same scene done the whole mind control thing not a fan hawkeye avoids being mind controlled simply because the filmmakers wanted to tell a joke does anyone see the irony in a sin like this anyone butt scratcher comic book hero movie splices frames from center stage into the final print jeremy makes captain america's scarlet witch induced flashback will consist of recreating a scene from swing kids a pop culture reference are you ready for our dance well this is a fun cameo but why is scarlet witch giving the avengers happy memories it isn't really a happy memory in fact i'd argue this is a sad one for cap considering i want the big one luckily the avengers parked their plane in an easily viewable area so that scarlet witch can control hulk which is just an excuse for the hulkbuster scene which this movie clearly needed missed opportunity for a that's what she said joke i'm calling it veronica this is the second time this movie that tony has called in some previously unknown support part of his arsenal for dramatic effect okay oh was that it i thought that there was more to this thing you decided to point out for the audience like maybe try explaining why that was a sin so tony has a suit that helps him defeat hulk the most undefeatable guy in all of marvel lore but somehow doesn't deem that superior suit worthy of wearing during normal ultron warfare why isn't the hulkbuster armor the default armor well considering ultron isn't necessarily a physical enemy so much as a techno-psychological one tony's mark 43 armor is more than capable of taking on ultron in his centuries besides the hulkbuster isn't designed to take on nimble enemies and instead to take brute force from the hulk something this armor fails at even in the comics hulkbuster armor is clearly badass but if black widow can solve hulk with a couple of arm touches and a hypno phrase then why didn't everyone learn that because black widow is the only one on the team with a vagina or did you miss the clear romantic angle this movie beats you over the head with to prove this point thor knows the lullaby but clearly failed when attempting it against the hulk hey big guy the sun's getting real low that's it sun's going down [Applause] i mean were they trying to out transformers three man of steel here setting aside the pop culture reference for a sec this is nearly every story dealing with the hulk destruction is the name of the game uh literally the reason it was so jarring in man of steel was because zack snyder doesn't understand the character superman wouldn't just destroy a city trying to stop an enemy v hulk absolutely would movie suggests that even in hulk mode banner is somehow able to see and feel sorrow for his terrible hulk actions but he is this is always how the hulk is portrayed he goes on a rampage levels the city reflects on the carnage and then calms down reverting to bruce luckily for hawkeye the avengers are disgraced and now his house functions as a means to make him matter more jeremy used to make jokes about hawkeye and then he took an arrow to the knee yeah fury helped me set this up when i joined and even though captain america winter soldier established that fury and let me stop you right there one sin for not acknowledging how clint's son is clearly asian i don't care how many scooby snacks he gave linda cardellini genetics don't work that way yo i saw something in that dream what dream i need answers to what i won't find him here wait what i'm so confused see what i mean he literally send the dream thor hat already remember this well this is a fun cameo but why is scarlet witch giving the avengers happy memories happy memories and now he just said what dream as if he didn't actually know again i got [ __ ] from people satirizing this in the infinity war parody video oh my god we get it but why second avengers film suddenly decides hawkeye is somehow the moral center of this group of crime fighters which is stupid rushed forced and stupid except the comics have always placed hawkeye as the avatar through which the audience views the other spectacular members of the avengers you see why the blanket statement of the books don't matter is pretty [ __ ] dumb because these characters and their stories are based on the books and just because you don't read them doesn't mean that this movie is at fault for you thinking established character traits are sins just in case you confused it with seoul norway i'm sending you here for completely skipping the scene where the movie establishes helen cho because you later ask who she is you still think you're the only monster on the team smart people know she's talking about being an efficient killer not that she can't have babies however should we send the fact that coming right on the heels of a revelation that she's sterile this script was a little tone deaf about that nope she's clearly referring to her sterility which is what allowed her to become an assassin that's what makes this conversation have so much gravity that and the subtext of them being surrounded by toys in a child's bedroom actually josh wheaton said i don't care what josh whedon says he's just attempting to deflect criticism every time someone tries to win a war before it starts innocent people die wait but what about when people try to win war after it starts do innocent people still die then because i think they do way to miscap's point here a war is something that is a result of preemptive attacks therefore he made your point before you did do me a favor jesus is there any reason for this guy to pop out of nowhere in this scene who's here that he'd be hiding from in a barn hydra well tron's going to evolve how has anyone been in contact with helen show who see also helen show the mother of amadeus cho one of the most intelligent beings in marvel and the current incredible hulk dr joe why is she not dead she's got a huge gash in her chest jeremy continues to believe everyone should die from minor to moderate wounds the real power is inside the cradle the gem oh jesus more [ __ ] things i'm gonna have to remember now with all the artifacts scepters gems minerals and inventions in these movies what makes things right in a year yeah but who are you and what is that purple thing movie expects me to keep up with all these artifacts scepters gems minerals and inventions and i'm just going to say this movie right in the ear i'm just saying i'm just saying thankfully since thawing out cap has seen matrix reload it i do not want another single pop culture reference out of you for the rest of the trip first off these people are dead knowing what we know about captain america and his unbelievable strength [ __ ] how he landed on the windscreen and you can clearly see that this woman is totally fine i'm sending the package to you how do you want me to take it well me and everyone else who just thought of a sex joke is going to help was it about boners because me thinks it was i know tony was at the internet hub place in norway but he can't iron man over here after that and help out and wasn't that like last night ah here it is the beginning of jeremy believing iron man is the solution to every single problem any character in marvel is having you did this in spider-man homecoming and now a movie called avengers besides you'd have seen this movie for korean air would like to take the subway tragedy excuse to remind you how awesome their air travel service is you seriously underestimate korea's willingness to self-promote this is coming from a half korean scattered dumped his memory but not his protocols whatever bull helps you sleep at night when you x mocking a character back to life the bastardization of words continues first you misused ex machina to mean someone being saved now you're using it to describe bringing an ai back online the what's next my shoestring is untied ex-machina my breath smells ex machina i have to pee ex machina we're mad scientists we're monsters buddy we've got to own it this is the speech one man of science gives another man of science to convince him to repeat a horribly failed previous experiment paging all real scientists how pissed off does this make you probably not at all considering this is how real science is conducted i know the general public doesn't know [ __ ] about actual science but repeating experiments is literally the most basic foundation of every scientific discipline if quicksilver isn't doing any quicksilvering right now then why is he seeing the bullet at quicksilver speed the sin here is thinking that being fast is something that quicksilver has to turn on this scene is to demonstrate his ability to react at lightning speed thor doesn't bolt and gives birth division but i'm not sure i believe my eyes because this is the same guy john nash hallucinated in a beautiful mind are these pop culture references fun for everyone i just i get annoyed when i hear them because like half the time they're obscure and the other time they just fall flat this time it was both every form he's built every trace of his presence on the net the net the net every trace this is some 1990s internet dialogue if i've ever heard it i find this ironic considering you didn't understand the earlier line when they said use the internet as an escape hatch he used the what to what now again it's just too bad for this movie the x-men days of future past quicksilver came first because it makes this a lot less awesome sorry joss it really doesn't because this version of quicksilver is far more comic book accurate than what we got in days pietro's name is not peter he's not american he starts out evil and he has a twin sister all things covered in this film and ignored in the other one i mean [ __ ] one looks like quicksilver and the other one doesn't period so the reason ultron is doing this is because jarvis stopped him from accessing nuclear launch codes and stuff that would make ending the world a lot easier but why not just build your own bombs ultron clearly has all the knowledge he needs to do something way easier than something out of the lex luthor handbook jeremy doesn't know that a meteor or in this case a meteorite of this size is an extinction level event where not even the tsar bomba could match its destructive capabilities in other words no thermonuclear bomb is capable of the amount of destruction of a land mass only a few kilometers in diameter you'll never remember what wait what cap can now somehow call his vibranium shield back to his arm via telepathy wow just wow they show that cap had an electromagnet installed in the shield like two hours ago in this sequence black widow will use taser knives to kill ultron bots at the rate of an actual super powered individual even though widow constantly demonstrates why she should be an avenger jeremy continuously questions her inclusion oh see if you never explain a hero's powers like even a tiny bit then you can get away with having the mind explode a bunch of enemies in the finale what the hell is there to explain at this point she has telekinesis in mind control you remind me of the people that go into target and ask where things are while standing right in front of the thing sir we have multiple bogeys converging on our starboard flank show them what we got and what we got turns out to be discount ironman as opposed to some kind of badass anti-aircraft guns you might expect on an airship like this technically roadie is a badass anti-aircraft gun maria still thinks this is an appropriate weapon in battles like this i mean it worked right that's the best you can do come on no you come on the shot pretty much sums up the entire movie right here useless robots doing useless things while the avengers pick them off do you get a feeling iron man could have done this job himself jeremy truly believes that iron man is the answer to everything the scene isn't so much a battle as it is a modeling session skip in fact i heard if you cut fast enough the viewer won't be able to truly settle in and establish on any one shot of the action thereby confusing them into thinking at all i said skip damn it you know with the benefit of hindsight remember how you liked it when hulk did that in the first movie you [ __ ] laugh it up hmm i don't remember hulk punching the [ __ ] out of someone so hard they went flying in the first film i think you got a bootleg copy from that dude that sells flowers and oranges every time ultron dies in this movie it's a bunch of nonsense isn't he still wandering around the internet no because they shut him off from the internet you'd have known that if you were paying attention now i need you to turn this bird around okay is hulk a [ __ ] pilot all of a sudden one word jeremy autopilot so that was the last ultron apparently even though i still have my doubts about that but what exactly made this the age of ultron anyway aren't ages a period of many many years miriam webster describes an age as a period of time dominated by a central figure or prominent feature which describes this movie to a t also age of ultron refers to the comic arc of the same name avengers team that has an all-powerful scarlet witch on their side literally doesn't need any other team members most especially a dude who can glide on some metal wings jesus considering wanda's fluctuating mental state in her propensity to civil war that's some [ __ ] also those wings aren't metal they're carbon fiber which would explain the rigidity flexibility ratio which i gotta say awesome that's awesome that's awesome that's awesome that's awesome that's awesome she's the best she's awesome since people don't seem to understand these videos are all connected even after putting if you haven't seen the previous video in this series at the beginning of my later videos i'm going to briefly explain something before the next video plays prior to cinemasins releasing their infinity war video i'd released a parody video where i made fun of cinemasins by predicting what they would say in their official video lines that i got near perfect are shown in the upcoming video as exhibits when i originally released this video many people were confused completely missing the fact that i'm showing these clips from the parody video and some even thought i was agreeing with cinemasons needless to say that was not the case perhaps this was my own hubris thinking you were all as smart as me but don't worry i won't be making that mistake again even for giving the nine seconds a black screen this logo takes up 34 seconds for one goddamn studio it's 35 seconds of logos okay and this is the first of many attempts to avoid saying exactly what i said in the parody video it's actually quite hilarious to see the effect i had on your video so here's five preemptive sins for being [ __ ] thanos supposedly kills half of a people he encounters so is this half of what was left of asgard because it looks like a whole lot more half of a hell of a lot is still a hell of a lot and the asgardians escaped in escape pods this was revealed in those 34 thickens of little goose and the russo brothers confirmed this the tesseract or your brother's head this 2 hour and 30 minute incomplete movie where thanos locates all the infinity stones is only necessary so that thanos can snap half the universe's population to death just so he can be lazy whoa incomplete i know it's called the avengers but this movie is thanos's film he is the main character and he gets a complete arc fulfilling his goal and winning in the end this is exactly the story from the comic infinity which i highly recommend to anyone that isn't a drooling babbling idiot that thinks the books don't matter we don't have the tesseract it was destroyed on asgard if thor doesn't send loki down into odin's trophy room at the end of thor the third does the tesseract survive it and float around in space and does thanos quest end when he realizes he can't possess the space stone does the snap only produce impotent sparks at that point it's a hypothetical eye grant but i'm sending it anyway well i'm sinning you're hypothetical because if thor doesn't send loki to play certain's head into the eternal flame asgard doesn't get destroyed damn did you not pay attention to that scene and if loki doesn't swiper the tesseract surtur almost assuredly would have destroyed the space stone the stones are not invincible we have a hulk why does hulk hold back during the battle while thanos destroys the asgardian ship until the end when loki says we have a hulk what the [ __ ] was he doing before then this thanos destroys hulk with only one stone in his glove later with many stones in the glove his punch will be held by super angry captain america after going toe-to-toe with iron man on titan for a good bit and the power distribution slash comparisons in the mcu have never felt more squirrelly than in this movie this scene was meant to show you just how powerful thanos is and to set the tone for the rest of the film for people who like you don't know [ __ ] about thanos mentioning the stones in his glove means nothing as he never uses the power stone vs hulk and all he did was stick his hand out vs cap while again never using any of the stones the fight with iron man required the usage of the stones because a tony sometimes fights at long range and because b the bleeding edge armor is badass and extremely powerful just who the [ __ ] is this guy ebony ma one of the members of the black order a group of aliens that serve thanos which usually consists of black dwarf proxima midnight corvus glaive and supergiant who strangely isn't in this movie oh no loki's gonna die again like in thor the dark world which definitely means he's probably not dead and even if he is i'm sending it anyway because that dark world scene did not get sinned enough you patting this in count bro i think you're padding the sink out in previous movies we were told hulk and banner have different memories so how does banner remember the hulk alone knows even if that were true when thanos boarded the asgardian ship it's implied that banner was transforming during the carnage so he would definitely remember thanos especially after waking up in the sanctum santorum stairs tony stark famous avenger is running around central park and nobody's bothering him this guy is more famous than any president or celebrity in history it's new york man i can just imagine some pot-bellied construction worker going tony stark never heard of her tony stark do normal people see this while i know new yorkers are up on their avengers knowledge i'm not quite so sure they've been informed about the masters of the mystic arts again it's new york man my old lady got a bigger portal than that two weeks ago vision turned off his transponder he's offline okay if he had a [ __ ] transponder and knew it he wouldn't have waited until two weeks ago to turn it off so this is some [ __ ] [ __ ] here but why just because you said so if it were three months ago you'd have said the exact same thing you patting the sink out bro captain i fell out hard we're not speaking terms really what was that letter cap sent you at the end of civil war then he specifically said if you need me i'll be there yeah that's not speaking terms he's specifically stating that if you need me to help save the world then i'll be there cap and iron man don't interact in this movie once the alien ship causes peter's spidey sense to go off and homecoming didn't give us any indication spidey sense even existed and now this movie is just thrusting it on me like well almost like they forgot it was a thing and are only now implementing it what does this scene even mean penis parker now has the ability to know what's going on miles away i need you to cause a distraction holy [ __ ] we're all gonna die ned you are a treasure [ __ ] ned man be none of the classmates on the bus see peter do this but plenty of other drivers and passengers on this bridge do and in the age of smartphones and dash cams and government surveillance this transition was definitely seen and captured on film and peter's cover is blown forever yes because seeing a white kid with brown hair from behind who then puts on a mask means we all know who spider-man is sure jeremy what's the matter with you kids you've never seen a spaceship before yeah sure they've seen a spaceship and it usually means bad things you know you wanted to send stan lee you trying to bs a bser when you're standing over there and you're standing over there and i don't know which way is up bring me the stone dude a minute ago you were making metal fly with the flick of your wrist why do you even need the futuristic space axe dude to do this for you literally in this scene you see that ebony maw can be overpowered and the combination of spider-man wong strange and tony would have probably beaten or killed maw if not for the intervention of black dwarf i need to concentrate here for a second bruce's hulk transformation troubles become an impotence metaphor hulk tile dysfunction and does that mean when he's successful it's like he's a huge green boner jeremy says green boner i realize that nanobots are legit real world science to a degree but tony suit is applying it in ways that make it utterly unbelievable there are literally people performing magic in this scene and nanotechnology something you admit has a real world basis is the one thing that's unbelievable unlock 17a thank god starkid pre-designed and built and voice programmed for deployment a space-worthy iron spider-man suit in the i'm guessing a few months since spider-man homecoming okay so there was a joke i made in my blade runner 2049 remastered video that went over a lot of people's heads but it went something like normally i would ask if you'd watch the previous movie but i see that you send that movie so the answer is obviously no because in this case you send spider-man homecoming but totally missed the scene at the end of the film that showed tony had already built the iron spider suit and this film is set two years after homecoming not a few months well this is 100 definitely not a reaction to cinemasins complaining about text place names and movies being used when they're unnecessary this is 100 definitely not a reaction to cinemasins complaining about text place names and movies being used when they are necessary there we have it folks cinemasins just admitted they watch my videos also this is another one of those attempts to not say exactly what i said in my parody video you noticed they didn't do another one of these for scotland nowhere or vermeer exactly of all the retro references to make groot is playing defender what a [ __ ] infuriating video game why is he even playing ancient earth games anyway aren't there modern alien games to download from the nebula if it wasn't obvious to those of you without a brain nearly everything related to guardians is retro on purpose their leader is basically stuck in the 80s you dipstick that thor is convenient and illogical but i do love fake newtons convenient i'm pretty sure the guardians were responding to a distress call from the ass guardians who the hell are you guys that's an awfully rude way to greet people you don't know i once woke up in this room and this dude tried to do all this gnarly to me with these strange tools and i was like who the hell are you and he said i'm your [ __ ] dentist [ __ ] yeah but your dentist isn't someone that you don't know so this entire line was irrelevant and a waste of everyone's time thanos retrieves another stone he'll be too powerful to stop he already is how exactly did they expect to stop thanos who doesn't even need infinity stones to be powerful but already has two of them plus thanos needs gamora to get the soul stone keeping gamora away from thanos is strategy 101 but because there's no time they hastily conjure up some no ass plants you couldn't be more wrong if you tried the plan is to keep him from the other infinity gems the morons were to go to nowhere and acquire the reality gem from the collector while thor heads to netherlands to get a thanos killing weapon no one even knows gamora knows where the soul gem is yet so what the [ __ ] are you talking about also they went from kind of maybe flirty to kissy face hotel buddies and deeply in love entirely off-screen i mean what the hell do you want a [ __ ] rocky montage of vision and wanda falling in love we already got that in civil war and if you ever read a damned comic you'd see this coming from a mile away look this is the [ __ ] mcu i refuse to believe anything is an accident and i'm losing sleep trying to unravel the meaning of we will deep fry your kebab is it a promise a threat a guarantee a cipher key the sign is taking up way more screen space than wanda's face it has to mean something are you [ __ ] serious you know what i guess this is my fault cinemasins's writers are trying their damnness to avoid anything i said and while it's hilarious it's also a little sad i guess all those boys that said a small channel with only 30 000 subs couldn't take on one with 8 million were completely and utterly wrong usa did that alien assassin sneak up on an android without being heard or seen or sensed you think androids can sense people and corvus glaive is basically a space ninja audience applause break don't you mean hot ryu ex machina you were supposed to say that word for word i can't help but to laugh at how jeremy has attempted to enunciate his laugh because i made fun of it son you really laugh like this see damn near no difference these henchmen failed to get the stone they were sent after and they peace out to save their own skin and i'm pretty sure even they know that thanos values the stones over his henchmen so what the [ __ ] are these minions thinking bailing out like this pretty sure they're thinking to live to fight another day i mean they don't actually return to thanos they bide their time and collect the outriders to fight in the battle of wakanda stay close check in don't take any chances we just wanted time you know to figure out the whole having sex with a synthetic vibranium body thing it's a lot tougher than you'd think you sure about that she's a woman and women kind of already use synthetic body things what's wrong little one the fact that thanos would ever have stopped on his kill quest for even a moment because of a cute kid is a big pill to swallow that's because you don't really know anything about thanos if this movie succeeds at anything it's fleshing out thanos and showing you he's not just another cgi movie monster but an actual character with an amazing amount of depth i mean he's right up there with ledger's joker if not better you're quite the fighter she asked a question that's it she's displayed zero fighter characteristics i'd have thought that with this particular movie you wouldn't try to manipulate a scene for a sin considering everyone and their mother has seen this film but cinemasins got a cinemason this is the scene where thanos sees that she's a fighter this half genocide scene illustrates a curious character detail in guardians of the galaxy when they told us gamora was the only survivor it's very likely that the people who made gamora's rap sheet are simply wrong however if you notice this why is it in your guardians 2 video that you assumed gamora can't hold on to drax because she isn't that strong even though it says right here that she has cybernetic enhancements thought i forgot about that [ __ ] didn't you swear to me on your mother movie characters think that a promise will be a bond if they swear on a loved one but of course it doesn't work that way cliche in other words nati here asks andy dwyer to keep an unkeepable promise i realize she has a hate boner of justice but god damn jeremy says hate boner you knew i'd come i counted on it so he assumed that the guardian ship would get the distress signal from the statesman they'd follow it they just so happened to run into thor he'd tell them about the reality stone and that she would agree to come here this is [ __ ] impossibly brilliant he didn't even tell thor he'd be coming here he just told his minions to get the two stones on earth and meet him at titan i'm seriously running out of phlegm we later learned that this is all a ruse for the guardians but why does thanos know that they're coming and if he knew this why doesn't he just kill everyone i know you all love this movie but this is pretty stupid why do drax and mantis go back to normal when thanos leaves the stone powers aren't proximity based but somehow the damage he did was only temporary seriously they survived this i mean why doesn't he just kill them this is a hologram of ross whose physical body is in a completely different room somewhere in the country and yet he's able to walk around this room like he's physically in this one is he in a replica room with a virtual reality display and if so there should be a camera somewhere in here tracking his eye movement so he can face the right way when he's talking to people right oh come on how the heck does this projection work the movie is just not interested in explaining literally anything where's the fight [ __ ] bucky with the white wolf has rested long enough [ __ ] bucky the hell is this spray stuff tony's using here to seal the breach in the ship's hole nano magic canned convenience it's magic whiz and it's cheesing me off it's mechanical sealant this [ __ ] exists in real life way to introduce a new character in the movie in the 19th film of a franchise and completely kill him off in an hour i mean there's five villains in this film did you seriously expect all of them to survive and what kind of complaint is this anyway ronan the accuser's dead iron monger is dead hella is dead and loki only took so long to die because of the fangirls don't do this farm here ultimately sisterly love is what causes her to give up the location of the soul stone and therefore the fate of the entire universe she begged her boyfriend to kill her rather than let thanos win yep beat you to this one too why would you tell him everyone in this movie just gives thanos what he wants because they're trying to save one person the whole goddamn universe is that stacey dicks you're gonna need more than one stupid eyeball but you're handing him a fake eyeball so he still only has one stupid eyeball right what the [ __ ] some random computerized alien eyeball has a connection port that matches thor's flesh-based eye socket connection port and also this one how is that obviously androidian eyeball going to work for a norse god this is the second marvel movie to waste peter dinklage actually the first the other one was a fox film and i wouldn't say waste he was awesome in this role and he killed everyone anyway all accepted me let me do some math here 300 dwarves were here one is left carry the nine multiplied by pi r squared that's 99.67 percent of the dwarf population which means he must have let 299 other dwarves on some other hammer building station lit you're making the mistake of thinking thanos wipes out half of a particular species when what he actually wants is to have all life dispassionately this means that a certain species can go extinct but it also means that another species can go completely untouched in theory it could even summon the bifrost because why not thor's gonna have to get to earth faster than a ship can take them somehow so bacon the bifrost into this baby and we're set stormbreaker in the comics actually can open portals to other dimensions for fast travel the movie tied this to the bifrost to associated with something the audience is already familiar with stone demands a sacrifice why does the soul stone require so many more parameters to acquire it than any other stone it's like the original creators of the stones themselves said okay if you're powerful enough to hold the other five gems we'll let you change reality move across space at will increase your strength and harness the most powerful energy in the universe go into the past of the future and access other people's minds but when it comes to controlling all life in the universe that's where we draw the line but this is [ __ ] the tesseract basically evaporated anyone that touched it the ether warped reality so it was damn near unfindable the time stone was guarded by the masters of the mystic arts and the sorcerer supreme and the power stone was being held by the celestials anyway this is probably a call back to the gems originally in the comics being called the soul gems i feel like the sacrifice of gamora would have played a lot better if thanos had been given his own proper origin film this is thanos's film how you haven't realized that and claimed to be a channel that's all about film is just laughable this death is sad until you realize that a the time stone will end up figuring into her coming back to life anyway and b that despite all the problems since the firing of james gunn guardians of the galaxy 3 was ready to go into production after this movie i'm willing to bet it isn't the time stone but ant-man that reverses all of this that's me can you buzz me in something's entered the atmosphere just one line about how thanos or something with the stones tells him exactly where each one is would be [ __ ] terrific it didn't help him at all with the soul stone he needed gamora to tell him that so why the precision knowledge with the others this isn't thanos leading this attack it's proxima midnight in corvus glaive remember they attempted to take the mind stone from vision already they've been tracking vision this entire time these ships hit the earth at massive speed i don't understand why they don't do to the planet what meteors that large would do because they aren't traveling anywhere near the speed meteors actually travel which can be anywhere between 25 to 160 000 miles per hour that's a minimum of 32 times the speed of sound i'm gonna hold it open that's suicide so was facing thanos without that ax okay dude you [ __ ] had a magical hammer made by this guy at this place and your sister smashed it like it was chocolate i take offense to the idea that an axe from here could defeat thanos and the fact that it nearly does here's the problem hella was worthy the fact is that she was the original owner of mjolnir couple that with the fact that she was just extremely powerful and this isn't as far-fetched as you're attempting to make it theoretically mjolnir could have nearly beaten thanos as well stormbreaker and mjolnir are made from uru a metallic material that is essentially immune to magic or energy projections oh good just what i wanted to see in this giant marvel movie swarms of easily killable cgi monster clones these guys are outriders some of the most powerful minions in marvel easily killable are not the words you want to be using here especially considering the overpowered captain america black panther and the hulkbuster armor they went to the trouble of showing him getting a wakandan-made vibranium arm and in battle all we really see him do is fire a machine gun don't you need two arms to shoot this kind of gun you open the battery in order to keep the aliens from going around and flanking them they open the [ __ ] shield barrier directly in front of them and honestly it's one of the most baffling military decisions on film since denzel started firing on friendly tanks and courage under fire because it clearly makes more sense to keep the fighting in front of them where they can easily contain the situation opposed to letting the outriders completely surround them when they clearly don't have the numbers to combat that you remind me of flat earthers who think it's possible to guard every inch of the supposed ice wall i love how they both leap in here punching like they somehow know these aren't aliens with poison skin or acid blood there are frogs here on earth that have poison skin well black panther is wearing a vibranium suit and cap is using vibranium gauntlets so i think they eye if thor can withstand the energy of a star then what can kill him the energy of a star because it very nearly does kill him and if puberty group didn't fix the axe it very well may have audience applause break i told you he wouldn't remove us in here i told you how the [ __ ] did thor know where to go once he got his new axe why'd he go to earth instead of titan called it how the [ __ ] does thor know where the fighting is and why go to wakanda instead of titan and when we faced extinction i offered a solution genocide but random passionate fair to rich and poor alike you know what would be awesome since the death snap doesn't discriminate if it killed thanos too imagine thanos actually deciding for the greater good that he could even die with such a snap but guess what you don't have the balls for that thanos believes that it is his responsibility to see this through to the end how would he know if his plan worked if he also died with all six stones i could simply snap my fingers they would all cease to exist why though why a snap and not an okay sign or salute or a middle finger because the snap of the fingers signifies something that is simple and quick do you do an okay sign or salute when you say the words like that think about it don't let him close his fist what he can't use the stones if he doesn't close his fist since [ __ ] when moving every single scene in this film where thanos is using the gauntlet he's closing his fist pay attention that punch somehow doesn't kill peter superhuman strength durability a protective suit made by tony stark mantis is thrown several hundred feet away from thanos spidey reacts to this and apparently can jump said amount of feet before mantis lands superhuman agility speed spider sense perfect equilibrium i know we like him and she loves him but honestly kill his ass and destroy the stone you idiots the universe is at stake i agree but the line is the universe is at stake you dicks okay notice you've copied my beard good thing there's no one to fight for a few seconds so we can have a humorous exchange about hair [ __ ] dicks ah there's the dicks vision x machina blurred vision x machina i'm just saying they're basically the same video so iron man shield can apparently withstand that good to know it's not like these stones are the most powerful [ __ ] objects in the universe or anything yeah this is the bleeding edge armor this armor is serious [Music] him wait what was that one more time [Laughter] i understand my child better than anyone you could never if we're about to see a reenactment of spike lee's old boy here i'd only like to see one specific scene jeremy wants to see a father have sex with his daughter no i'm not joking the soul stone is the only one to demand a sacrifice so you understand its power but the mine stone is the largest one and takes up the leader position of all the stones in the glove well it kind of makes sense when you think about the mind or brain being the thing that controls everything in your body not to mention you need a strong mind to control all the abilities of the other gems at once honestly should anything be able to defeat that glove right now let alone a new axe that we only just learned about no no no you just learned about stormbreaker for those of us who actually read the comics we weren't surprised in the slightest sure this version is a little different but this axe has incredible feats and remember it's nearly impervious to energy projection we now interrupt this avengers movie to bring you a special presentation of harry potter and the deathly hallows starring josh brolin as dumbledmore god damn it the dumble mort got me and i was trying to go this whole video without removing a sin part of the movie where the snap of death plays a game who's gonna live and who's gonna die and apparently it takes its time picking and choosing because all the dramatically relevant deaths wait for each other so we can see them all rather than happening at the same time but they are happening at relatively the same time again this is for the benefit of the audience it's a [ __ ] movie not a documentary well it's distressing to see your favorite characters wasting away don't you just know they're all going to be back yeah but it doesn't take away the sting of seeing spider-man die like that though and hell we don't even know if everyone is coming back or if the survivors will survive the next film geez did thanos move out into chemists or whatever the [ __ ] that was and a wrinkle in time you know what that means chris pine is going to complete the chris quad fecta in avengers 4 woohoo as if right on cue jeremy makes a pop culture ref avengers assembled [Music] [Music] [Music] 15 cents for making the audience wait this long who the [ __ ] do you think you are valve hawkeye's entire goddamn family gets snapped away his wife and three children and ant-man two more antonin we saw scott lose everyone around him when he went into the quantum realm we saw both fury and maria hill disappear and meanwhile craig and his family are completely okay you hear that greg you and your stupid family craig yes you all waited seven months and two days for this congratulations 34 seconds of marvel logos holy thank god it finally showed up though i was gonna pass out feel like ethan hunt getting a hit of oxygen after that free dive in rogue nation a pop culture reference and logos in combined into one damn bringing out all the stops for this video aren't we so the fuel cells were cracked during battle and we figured out a way to reverse the ion charge and bought ourselves about 48 hours of flight time why the did they take off in this ship without inspecting every last detail i know the urge to go home is strong but they could have stayed on titan for a while to potentially find supplies fix whatever needed to be fixed and find fuel from at least two ships that crash landed during that fight nebula's necro craft and the q-ship i feel like this whole thing was made up just to get captain marvel involved wait what did you take a stupid pill when watching the ending of infinity war you must have because you're suggesting that tony was in any mental state to check a ship he knows nothing about for fuel right after being stabbed by thanos and having people disappear in front of him after losing the time stone wait each of these sinks in this bathroom have individual shaving mirrors is that really necessary it's about as necessary as pointing this out gwyneth paltrow doesn't know what movie she's in in this scene picking on gwyneth paltrow for no discernible reason ex-mocking a cliche he did exactly what he said he was going to do thanos swiped out 50 of all living creatures even though the world governments are in pieces they were able to take not only an impromptu census but also a cat and dog census this scene isn't stating that they took a census only that thanos said something and that something happened they have no reason to doubt anything thanos stated so if he stated he intended to kill half the population that's probably what he did honestly into this exact second i thought you were build a bear har har tones this falls just as flat as what he called ebony maha squidward in infinity war rando pop culture references don't always acquaint the comedy movie amazing coming from the guy that literally only uses pop culture references to keep up the facade that this series isn't meant as actual criticism and saying the squidward joke fell flat hmm let's see what actual audiences thought of that scene i like it another [Music] with the avengers not the pre-avengers okay right you made your point sit down pick a lane movie either tony is so upset that he can't think straight or he's just light-hearted enough to make whimsical comments about captain marvel and call rocket a build-a-bear it can't be both aren't you the same guy that said tony should have checked the binatar for fuel after thanos killed the iron spider you're contradicting yourself here where the hell have you been all this time there are a lot of other planets in the universe and unfortunately they didn't have you guys how did the story of thanos looking for the infinity stones elude you in your travels are you serious the avengers didn't know about thanos looking for the infinity stones until infinity war and they fought his army 11 years ago thanos didn't make his intentions known until he attacked zandar and by this time captain marvel was busy farting around with squirrels light years away this is gonna work steve i know i will because i don't know what i'm gonna do if it doesn't go back to the fantastic four up your ass we use the stones to destroy the stones weird i used my farts to cover for other farts but there were still farts left over so what gives this is what happens when you push cinemasins into a corner and they try to prove that they are a comedy channel and not a criticism channel you get jokes like these this is why we say that they are mainly a movie criticism channel because when they actually try to be funny well once again tele holograms will have a normal conversation with each other like they're literally standing in a room like this when in fact they're all by themselves in some sort of hollow booth that i would just once like to see an operation if they're wearing vr we'd see it on their holograms if they have a panoramic video screen around them that is tied to a certain channel then where is camera come on is this really something wrong with avengers end game who the hell is sitting around going gee i wonder how these holograms work i mean there's a talking space raccoon on the screen who not only speaks english but does so with a brooklyn accent who gives a [ __ ] about how these holograms work and why would the movie be better for explaining it i'm sorry that must have been a very long five years yeah but that's just it for me it was five hours the quantum realm makes years seem like hours why did michelle pfeiffer look 30 years older when she got rescued from it ant-man said that time works differently in the quantum realm not that the quantum realm makes years seem like ours at the end of ant-man 2 janet specifically warned scott to avoid time vortexes meaning she knew to avoid them while she was there and don't get sucked into a time vortex we won't be able to save you what if there was a way that we could enter the quantum realm at a certain point in time but then exit the quantum realm at another point in time so you spent five hours in the quantum realm and because of relativity that was five years on earth the problem is in both the quantum realm and in the outside world time was moving forward so why do you think there are points that you can go to just because of your five-hour experience with relativity as i just explained the point is that time works differently in the quantum realm no one said anything about relativity you see this is why everyone should have watched ant-man 2 it's explained that there are time vortexes in those vortexes are what the avengers use to time travel now scott asking why can't they use his experience to go back in time is due to him having literally time traveled to the future logic dictates that if you can enter a vortex that continue into the future there might be a vortex that can go to the past so who do we talk to about this i'm not a [ __ ] quantum physicist look i know tony's brilliant but this has never been his forte if anything scott himself should know some more appropriate scientists through his associations with hank well not see if larry fishburn is still alive except physics is precisely where tony's expertise is concentrated with hank pym shuri and spider-man all dead the hulk and iron man are the only two geniuses they know about with the capability to handle this and bill foster is on the run jesus did no one watch ant-man 2 we could go back we could get them sure getting your friends and loved ones back is a noble idea but it's also morally murky remember life has been going on for five years now people have moved on people are in new marriages some dangerous people who used to torment others are out of the picture this would cause even more chaos and be like cast away times 3.5 billion so essentially what you're saying is that all the innocent people who were snapped away through no fault of their own should stay dead simply because the people that survived have moved on can't say i agree with that cinemasins model rendered holy tony solves the eternal question of time travel and less time than it took to actually write the scene is that really unbelievable in the context of this universe though tony has solved countless seemingly impossible scientific problems like creating ai synthesizing new elements and building insane exoskeletons the first of which was done in a cave with a box of scraps then you throw in the fact that we know time travel or manipulation is possible in this universe and this really seems like an inevitability trying to get you to stop has been one of the few failures of my entire life pithy one liner aside he totally stopped he's out here raising a family in a goddamn cabin in the woods washing his own dishes and tucking his kid into bed at night he's not out there iron manning anymore so this line is a big old sack pepper wasn't the one that got him to stop though thanos beating the avengers is the reason he stopped okay here we go time travel test number one this test is not successful but it's also not unsuccessful in that they do actually transport scott over time so this means that two scientists have made giant breakthroughs in time travel over the same roughly 12-hour period first of all no bruce did not succeed in transporting scott over time what he did was push time through scott there's a difference and the reason bruce figured out this was possible was because scott proved the existence of the time vortexes by traveling through them the same reason tony made his discovery a fully functioning time space gps it's weird to me that tony knew enough of hank pym's work to properly make a device that would help people travel through time in the quantum realm a place where only two people have ever been with one of those people evaporated by the snap and the other being lovable doofus scott i thought the first ant-man was about how hank took his work and hid it from everyone including tony's dad and the evil darren cross tried to make his own tech that ended up liquefying a baby lamb and they ended up blowing up dude's lap i'm pretty sure they didn't give this tech to tony so the result is tony's a genius don't think time travel possible by rule i think the movie has to do this because the how isn't all that explainable and the movie is three hours but jesus it took doc brown 30 years to perfect time travel and it didn't even require that much explanation because you trusted the amount of time that went into it the dialogue presented when scott pleads with tony to help them in the later scene showing tony's failed attempts at solving the problem demonstrates that tony had already been playing around with the idea of time travel time travel is a staple of science fiction and something physicists have been theorizing about for years of course tony has considered it before knowing of hank pym's work this is why he knows quantum fluctuation messes with the planck scale scott's visit introduces new possibilities so it causes tony to revisit and figure out the problem this is 100 on scott here how did he not notice a [ __ ] spaceship about to land a few yards away before he opened the taco this is you manipulating a scene once again when scott unwrapped his taco the binitar was not even in the vicinity yet and only landed when it was in his hand thor's fat get it it's a joke for almost the whole movie except when the movie wants you to take it seriously then back to joke get it fat thor is actually the best character building aspect of this movie this man has lost his brother his sister his father his mother half his people and feels responsible for billions of deaths simply because he tried to savor his victory over thanos and didn't kill him instantly he's let himself go because sometimes this is what people do when they've lost everything it's funny but it makes sense of all the [ __ ] this movie did not need it's hawkeye's career is a vigilante but even more i can't believe hawkeye is the kind of guy who can take on a horde of yakuza on his own you might say hawkeye has fought tons of enemies stronger than this and i say with help this is what i've been telling you forever hawkeye is far more badass than you have been giving him credit for there is a reason this guy is an avenger and it's because he can do [ __ ] like this one side there lebowski hilarious reference but this is a reference to a movie that starred jeff bridges who was in the original iron man stop at the constant references especially when they make no goddamn sense jeremy sends a film for doing something he does all the time ex machina if you travel to the past that past becomes your future and your former present becomes the past which can't now be changed by your new future are we really just going to leave out the alternative timeline explanation here because this reason focuses on the effects of time travel on one individual it basically says all those new timeline people can go themselves except the film answers this question by showing you that nothing really happens to these other timelines when they slip into them however the long-term effects of time travel haven't been explored yet and i suspect they will further answer these questions with mordo and doctor strange too we only have enough pin particles for one round trip each and these stones have been in a lot of different places they later accidentally themselves into hank's lab in 1970 and grabbed some pim juice then but why wouldn't they just start by going back to a time when hank was alive and grab a bunch of them net so that they'd have almost unlimited chances at this i'm not just throwing out a crazy amateur theory this makes all the sense and there are at least two super geniuses on this team obviously the time heist works on a cinematic level but your idea runs the risk of failing and being stuck in the past a better idea would be for fat thor to return to wakanda in 2018 where 2018 thor has thanos subdued and chop thanos arm and head off with stormbreaker boom all six stones i like the avengers theme a lot like it's one of the most recognizable themes in modern movies but they lean hard into that in this movie this would be like star wars playing the opening fanfare during all your favorite moments in return to the jedi no it would be like if star wars played the imperial march through all your favorite moments in empire in return of the jedi which they do movie gives me another chance to send this stupid gun cocking that black widow does during the hero shot hordes of aliens are raining down on new york but sure the fate of the world might end up resting on that clock dude with a literal bow and arrow in the background sends the gun oh thanks for the rooftop assist ancient one you ever think of maybe sending some of the masters you know out to the battle since this directly threatens earth does the threat only have to be mystical before you get off your ass says this while literally showing a scene of her getting off her ass hmm i think i know a guy parodying cinemasins who said something similar i'm gonna have to call the director that's okay trust me hail andrew look this is a great scene it's even a fun throwback to winter soldier in the middle of the 2012 avengers timeline but this [ __ ] decides eh we don't have to call the director about this even though he's never been told that cap is on board with hydra i mean he doesn't even think it might be a trick or something what reason would they have to think cap in 2012 is trying to trick them from their perspective demonstrating that he has knowledge of hydra and hasn't yet killed them means he's on their team period the infinity stones create what you experience as the flow of time remove one of the stones and that close splits oh is that so so in 2023 present day with the stones destroyed what did that do with the flow of time or did the atom still count this is incredible the sorcerer's supreme literally says what happens when you remove a stone and seconds later you ask what happens when you remove a stone anyway yes the atoms do count i can't risk this reality on a promise i'll also require a hunch about what dr strange is going to do in a few years i have that reality risked or she knows that doctor strange wouldn't give up the time stone without a reason you know the explanation in the film thor totally [ __ ] the dark world thor there's a battle about to take place here when you screwed him because you want your hammer back sure steve brings the hammer back but thor doesn't know that someone's going to make a return trip until later when bruce finds out about the branch realities from the ancient one bruce quickly suggests returning everything back to his proper time after being rebuffed by the sorcerer's supreme meaning that the plan to return everything was probably already in place guys i've got it since we lost the wonderful stan lee let's just cast mark maron to stand in for his cameos in future mcu movies look at him it's perfect jeremy says all this and treats it as a sin of this movie how is this a sin you might ask who the [ __ ] knows but the raccoon didn't have to climb a mountain but how do they know to climb this mountain or any mountain at all there's an entire planet to explore but they're positive the soul stone is right here they know because pretty much everything was explained to them by nebula who had it explained to her by gamora the only thing no one knew was that a sacrifice was required this being the second time we've seen a successful acquisition of the soul stone i'm wondering what the [ __ ] does red skull do after this does he wait until someone brings it back and remember steve is supposed to come back here later and replace the stone like this never happened where does he put it the fact that this stone is acquired by a sacrifice rather than stolen makes it a problematic stone to return no according to the russos red skull is set free when someone attains the soul stone and obviously returning the stone isn't problematic because steve actually does it the fact that it isn't shown to you doesn't mean it's a problem or a sin of this film can't get her back can't be undone well yeah it can actually since you guys obviously don't give a [ __ ] about other timelines you can just go back to a time where she's lived and just take her with you i know i said this in my parody video mocking cinemasins but this is true after they undo the snap they can just use the pin particles to return to right before she died getting the soul stone and bring her to this timeline while giving that timeline's clint the soul stone so that he can complete his mission there's no real reason they cannot do this hulk snap brought back all the dead folks to life but let's think about the practicalities here what happened to people who were like on a flight when thanos did his do they appear in midair and do a wily coyote shrug before falling to their deaths or did hulk guide them to safety and how unfair is it that the people who were snapped away off an airplane get to live but the people who crashed into the airplane just stayed dead and the people who died were brought back then checked the cemeteries because we have a zombie apocalypse on our hands this was something i was curious about myself until i stumbled upon kevin feige explaining that smart hulk had the forethought to return people safely relative to their original position this means if they were in the air they were returned to the ground or the safest land mass this is backed up by the film showing no falling humans from the sky as for the people that died due to their craft losing a pilot yep they stay dead with the stones you've collected for me create a new one teeming with life that knows not what it is lost but only what it has been given so with the stones he could have literally done anything he wanted and he chose option z cut the population of the universe in half what a [ __ ] dick i was on board with thanos with thoughtful madness because it made a certain sense for a villain to exercise our cruel intelligence on life and his quest for balance but now that we know he could create a whole universe that whole balance thing that he wants a spouse and i believed in no longer works he could have created two earths connected by an accordion tunnel and told astrophysics to go for itself while half the population moved to the literal new world source material doesn't matter in the cinemasins universe but the word on the street is that the comic book thanos did all this to impress a lady named death that's right the power of boners made thanos do this and his actions make way more sense under that context than this does the thing that you have to understand is that this is a different thanos he has learned from the mistakes of his future self and he realized that people will attempt to change what he does the previous thanos thought everyone would be grateful his new plan is to create a new universe that doesn't know about him killing half of them that way no one will try to undo his actions also jeremy says boner avengers assemble yes although this means we're going to get a stupid jumble of effects driven bull fan service for the next several minutes before there are actual stakes involved aren't we what kind of horrific slack-jawed bird brain pig nipple would send this amazing scene them's fighting sins yeah what do you want me to do with this damn thing get those stones as far away as possible no we need to get them back where they came from this might be the dumbest part of the movie because cap and hulk's orders are not mutually exclusive they should be getting the stones as far away as possible so that thanos can't get them and they can always take the stones back after they beat thanos anytime they want to solve the branch reality problem dude are you not watching the movie thanos just took on iron man thor and captain america wielding mjolnir and damn near one by himself now he has his army with him this is nowhere near a lock that they will win so it's best to at least try to take these stones back to the past if i tell you what happens it won't happen this is absolutely telling him what happens is it because i'm pretty sure tony has no idea he's about to kill himself as i see ant-man and the waff smiling at each other and shrinking down i'm once again compelled to ask why they can't fly into thanos ear canal or nostril reimbigging themselves and explode thanos into 100 million balanced chunks of meat this was the problem with all the people suggesting that ant-man should go up thanos's butt thanos is incredibly strong and durable what would end up happening is ant-man would crush himself inside thanos body that would be like trying to destroy two cinderblocks by inflating a balloon between them come on of all the scenes in the marvel movies that don't make the power differential clear between two opponents it's this one captain marvel is worlds stronger than thanos and thanos has taken a beating so far in what universe is captain marvel worlds stronger than [ __ ] thanos did you not just see him sling her like a ragdoll if she were worlds stronger she'd have wrestled the gauntlet away and she had her hands on it twice it also took both her hands to keep his one hand from closing yeah yeah yeah headbutt but thanos had been fighting thor iron man captain america with mjolnir and scarlet witch and had taken significant damage in this battle and is still holding his own this is just two powerful characters going back and forth i don't see the issue here during the struggle iron man is able to remove the stones from the nanotech gauntlet either there was an ejector button or he pried them off i don't know what the hell happened it looks like the stones may have fallen off and landed on the ground but that could just be pieces of tony's suit for all i know but somehow this turns into tony having possession of the stones no questions asked in infinity war we were shown that tony basically has mental control over the nano machines in his suit so all he would have to do is use that ability to transfer the stones to his hand do they have to turn denounced if you kill a bunch of fools with the infinity gauntlet like can you ask them to turn into something a little jazzier like confetti or dippin dots or play slime or something i don't know less dour yes you can see why asking questions don't count as sins i guess tony ordered up to make all the thanos army disappear in front of thanos before thanos disappears snap if you're the avengers don't you get a little worried that thanos isn't going away during all this obviously tony wants thanos to see his people die the same way he was forced to watch spider-man die and if i'm an avenger i clearly understand what is going on here and would moon thanos to rub it in before he dies [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] so [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] you

Channel: Th3Birdman

Views: 436,759

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Id: bvXCTMDscco

Length: 78min 56sec (4736 seconds)

Published: Thu Jul 28 2022