Everything Wrong With CinemaSins: Kung Fu Panda

foreign which is meant to build Poe's character this opening dream sequence is meant to establish Poe's love of kung fu and furious five so the narration here is required how to poke it down from that high up so quickly he's either Master teleportation in his fantasy or this is later all his former foes are gone it's just reigning cats and dogs are you seriously questioning logic in a dream never before had a panda been so feared and so loved pandas of the past have set a pretty low bar for both of those pandas mostly just lay around eat bamboo and don't have sex okay why is this a sin of the movie the way I see it you basically supported Poe's Point even more he said never before has a panda been so feared or so loved and you just gave examples of why they wouldn't be the furious five seem rather nonchalant about being on fire are you saying to furious five are on fire because just from this shot the fire is clearly behind them even if this was true this is an animated stylized dream we're talking about here it's dramatic like this on purpose the Furious Five wonder how much Dream works I had to pay Neil Moritz to call him that oh a fast and furious joke this doesn't really work though because this movie came out in 2008 one year before the fourth fast film so the hilarious titles of those movies weren't even known yet we should hang out why is monkey the only one who wants to hang out with him even his own fantasy why is that the Assumption you make instead of monkey saying what the other five are thinking also this is one of the seven brief times Jackie Chan has monkey gets to speak so I looked up to Kung Fu Panda script and as it turns out Jackie Chan actually has nine lines in this movie hey CinemaSins likes being overly nitpicky why can't I why are pose dreams fantasies two-dimensional because movies are art and this is the kind of Animation the filmmakers wanted to do to make their movies seem unique honestly I think this is a genius idea since dreams aren't real 2D animation doesn't look real but 3D animation is close to the looking real and so that's what it looks like in the real world even if you ignore what I said who cares Jeremy nobody was watch this movie and thinking that was a legit problem oh get up come on cut his bed yes Poe was able to fall down the stairs without cutting the [ __ ] out of his hand with the ninja star he's holding well we're talking about a world where animals are basically humans humans don't exist and a panda Lords freaking Kung Fu but this is the most ridiculous thing to you how is post father a duck I mean I'm all for adoption or animal-based movies but in early China a duck adopting a panda I just don't see it okay this sin is actually inexcusable Kung Fu Panda 2 came out in 2011 and you made this video in 2016 to Hype up the then upcoming third film so you definitely know that pink found Po in that radish basket and decided to take care of him because of his compassion po falls down the stairs gets up and picks up the radishes with both hands he had a ninja star ends up in these noodles and also in that flashback ping mentions that he decided not to use radishes in his noodle soups so those aren't radishes happy days my son finally having the noodle dream I don't know a lot about cooking noodles or owning a noodle restaurant but is the only qualification having a dream about noodles specifically the noodle dream I didn't have a dream about making fun of movies for a living oh wait yeah I did and this is also a world where peacocks invented fireworks my point is that this world has different rules from ours how are those rabbits not super pissed that Poe and his dad are just chit chatting and not serving them soup says they're not serving them soup while showing ping handing them soup didn't you ever I don't know want to do something else something besides noodles it's the hero has dreamed beyond what his family wants cliche even though being a fourth generation restaurateur sounds like a pretty nice gig being a restaurant tour is a better gig than kung fu also why do some of the noodle soup patrons get table service while the others pick up at the counter maybe both of those are options that the customer gets to choose and does he really need to know the tables I feel like he could just pass out noodles to whoever doesn't have noodles this is coming from someone who currently Works customer service trust me that kind of work has the potential to release a Karen hilarity aside shouldn't Master Oogway possess some kind of wind altering power that would allow him to blow out all the candles with a simple tilt of the staff or does he need to attend the Lord Blackwood School of extinguishment Master Shifu attended the Lord Blackwood School of extinguishment and didn't invite anyone else Cinema wins honestly explains this point better but to summarize this scene is meant to build character Oogway is someone who takes his time and doesn't like to rush while Shifu is someone who wants to get straight to the point so do all the creatures of this universe have low resolution memories or is it just Shifu and Pope memories you know the opening sequence was a dream right and once again this is a stylistic choice is that a magic staff does this Turtle use magic why not use magic instead of kung fu in both sequels this Series has established that after learning Kung Fu the student then moves on to learning how to do anything with the power of inner peace and then how to harness to a chi this tells me that kung fu is needed to learn magic so did the Furious 5 get dropped out of a helicopter or do they all have the ability to jump 400 feet into the air well this is a silly question one of the members has the ability to fly for crying out loud and he also has super strength how is that not obvious to you the thousand tongues of fire I was disappointed to find out there is not an adult movie called this Jeremy sends something he likes cliche every time I see them all together I think to myself there are four of them why are they called the furious five oh wait I didn't see the Mantis that's racist so the sin here is that mantis is Tiny that's not a sin in the movie that's a sin for you you're right that is racist the universe has brought us the Dragon Warrior choosing the Dragon Warrior is an incredibly vague process the oldest dude just points randomly in whatever is in front of his finger is the winner as Oogway states there are no accidents he believes everything has a point to it there are no accidents not believing an accident I disagree that that's a sin but that should have debunked your last sin 1 000 guards and one prisoner all subsidized by Valley Of Peace tax dollars ridiculous what must the taxes be like for these citizens who cares behold Thai long between letting a random messenger in to see the world's most guarded prisoner and the haphazard way they chose Dragon Warrior I'm concerned about this ancient Chinese animal society's looseness with safety and protocol random messenger this Goose said he had a message from Master Shifu and they're keeping a prisoner that presumably who himself handed to them of course they butt him in they made me Google does China have rhinos I'm not watching Kung Fu Panda to learn people yes China has rhinos and that point about not wanting to learn and I guess that explains your ignorance when it comes to comic book movies you will never be the Dragon Warrior until you have learned the secret of the Dragon scroll whoa so um how does this work do you have a ladder or a trampoline or perhaps a chair and some fireworks or maybe one of the furious five could just jump up there and get it except Shifu himself then goes on to explain that he can't just hand the dragon scroll a Poe he has to earn it and I'm pretty sure you've already seen this movie so you know how Shifu ultimately gets it down so is this duck their slave just ask him maybe it's a servant maybe he's an employee it doesn't matter it doesn't affect the quality of the film nobody cares or even see his toes this is two of the seven times Jackie Chan gets to speak oh so we're continuing to use the wrong number that's not going to get grading at all also why is poe hiding out behind rocks Along on a scary walkway in the middle of the night because he's following the five to their bedrooms so just trying to use these kind of paper screens the same way Japan does Kung Fu Panda stop trying to make me learn even if they don't this isn't the real world we're talking about here so this kind of question doesn't matter is that what it is I am so sorry I thought it was just a regular Cree Poe may not have any kung fu skills at this point but his talking with a mouthful of peaches skills are on point ah here's the questioning physics in a cartoon portion of the video quit don't quit noodles don't noodles don't noodles what everyone may be interpreting as oogway's wisdom is really just oogway's Alzheimer's Jeremy conveniently leaves out the rest of Oogway speech here furthering the correct interpretation that he's being a wise Sage for such a high quality prison run by rhinos they really didn't think through the restraining process even though this prison is completely dedicated to Tai long it's clear that he can escape if he just has any piece of anything let's think about this for a second the only way Tai long was able to escape is because of A Goose's feather that is something nagars didn't think about and it's not something they would have thought would work and he's currently tied up here and the only way he got out was because the Rhinos started shooting giant arrows at him and Tai Lung was able to position chains to get hit by the arrows that's an example of the Rhino underestimating him [Applause] thank you this takes the henchmen our terrible shots cliche to a whole new level they have giant crossbows on mounts and he is still relatively restrained you literally show tylon moving out of the way to dodge those arrows so this was pure luck for Tai Lung which brings up the question what was his plan if this didn't happen was he just going to pull those giant heavy rocks up and hope for the best Tai long has been here for years I'm sure you knew about the giant crossbows above him anywhere neither is he I know Clark Duncan are you sending this movie for having Michael Clarke Duncan voice this rhino this Escape is brought to you by cartoon physics allowing Bugs Bunny to thwart other Rascals since 1938. wait so you are aware that this kind of movie doesn't follow real world rules then why are you constantly questioning that in animated movie is having physics like this isn't a sin in fact audiences pretty much expect that whenever they watch one it's coming this way he won't get far this guard isn't acknowledging that he has already gotten pretty far when he says he won't get far he's referring to getting to the top of the elevator I'd say he's using the phrase correctly here foreign plausible Escape how exactly did Tai long make it out of that Vault I guess the animators got too lazy to animate him out of that last predicament so they just ignored it all together that's actually kind of the point the movie is trying to visually show you how powerful Tai Lung is just the fact that he's able to do this is supposed to make you go whoa how did he do that thus making you scared of him once he fights the furious five and Poe later Rhino Helm scream sending the Wilhelm scream [Music] didn't place any of those 1000 guards around the perimeter huh is this sin supposed to be a joke because it's clearly contradicted by these guards surrounding Tai Lung did Thailand disintegrate him why are we just seeing this copper horn Shield that has no obvious purpose drop to the ground that was Zhang's hat fly back there and tell them the real dragon warrior is coming home this makes for a cool movie moment of evilness I guess but in no way does this make any military sense for the villain to do this this is a thousand times worse than monologuing sending Advance word to the enemy slash good guys that you're coming cocky is one thing stupid is another Zen was sent here because Shifu want him to double the security after Oogway had had a vision that Tai Lung was coming back tylon knows his master well so he knows that they know he's coming back he sends zeng back to make them feel afraid which is something bad guys love doing so I guess shifu's plan is half the furious five beat the [ __ ] out of him until he decides to go home I thought this was a family movie well yeah Shifu thinks Oogway was wrong in choosing Poe and so wants them to give up and possibly choose the real dragon warrior what about this is kid inappropriate cartoon or not Poe is dead this sentence but he will another reminder that Jackie Chan got paid handsomely to say five sentence fragments and two complete sentences that will come later we're still lying about this really and he raised him as his son father son Dynamic adds holy unoriginal Dynamic to the hero slash villain dynamic in this movie so what if it is an original it's still compelling honestly the whole back story about how Shifu built up Tai Lung as the Dragon Warrior only for ugwe to say that he is it is fantastic character building and explains tylon's attitude in this movie The Oogway saw darkness in his heart and refused more Yoda Anakin rip off yeah no Oogway saw darkness in tylon's heart refused to make him the Dragon Warrior and Tai Lung went on a rampage Yoda saw darkness and Anakin's heart refused to train him but then changed his mind once Qui-Gon died and Obi-Wan made it clear that he will train Anakin with or without the council's approval it wasn't until after anken was trained lost his mother married Padme and then got tempted by Palpatine from the finally start killing children this is what I'm talking about with the magic why the make the Protege go through literal Kung Fu gauntlets when there's obvious magic that can be taught are we sure this turtle is on the up and up again magic comes after learning Kung Fu Oogway is over 500 years old so obviously he knows this kind of Magic by now there are no accidents not believing in accidents oh my gosh how many of the sins in this video are just Jeremy repeating himself oh yeah someone needs to tell Shifu that not every moment requires Kung Fu you're telling me if you learned Kung Fu you won't be using that in everyday life all the time my time has come you must continue your journey without me Oogway heard that Tai Lung was coming and he accidentally picked a fat Panda to beat the dragon warrior so he is getting the [ __ ] out of Dodge because oogue wants Shifu and Poe to learn the lesson that there is no secret ingredient on their own this is extremely common in stories like this since we earlier brought up Star Wars Luke had to do the same thing learning how to resist the dark side without Yoda and Obi-Wan's help let us stop Tai Lung this is what you've trained us for no he trained them to defeat he who has already been defeated and subsequently imprisoned it's convenient that he broke out or all of their training would have been a waste of time Shifu immediately tells Tigers no which implies that Tigris believes that's why they were trained she was simply wrong the pool of sacred tears funny enough the pool of sacred tears was the name of my band and eighth grade you know for a challenge that's supposed to be funny they sure aren't funny when you have been trained you may eat so basically Shifu is training Poe the same way I trained my dog to sit stay and roll over yes exactly Poe is different from the other furious five and needs food to motivate him in his everyday life Shifu figured this out in the earlier scene when Poe jumped high up just to grab a jar of cookies the inevitable training montage we all knew was coming imagine Jack Black in a booth recording Kung Fu sounds for the scene so training montages are sins that you love the Rocky movies I highly doubt that Poe would be motivated by a bowl of steamed carrots and lettuce considering pandas eat bamboo in real life you have been trained you are free to eat wow years of kung fu training mastered in a business week he must really be the Dragon Warrior except it's not all Master judged by the fact that there are two more movies after this Kung Fu dumpling hockey well the Kung Fu version of the shell game is [ __ ] unfair as hell so what was the point of that sin removal I'm not hungry Shifu shouldn't be hungry either he ate all the dumplings which raises the question why is Shifu viewing this as Poe being successful he only got one of the 11 dumplings this is a Kung Fu battle where he can quantifiably see who the winner is okay screw it I'll just play Cinema wins explaining this he really says this better than I ever could I'm not hungry this might seem strange at first because Poe is always hungry but remember you eat when you are upset which he does multiple times so his real Victory is not needing any comfort food and also realizing that he still has more to learn man that prison is really [ __ ] far away dude yeah so I don't see why it's such a big deal the Tiger's false she can just do a flip right before she hits the ground and she'll be fine it's possible there's water down there I know we have taken some pretty serious liberties with physics in the movie but mantis holding the Rope Bridge with all his friends on it seems far-fetched even for the universe filled with Kung Fu Fighting animals this isn't the first time you've questioned cartoon physics though not to mention it's implied that mantis has super strength I love how the five are renowned for their greatness but due to the movie's overhyping of the Dragon Warrior four of the five can't take out a bad guy together which is some [ __ ] Bruce Lee was a badass but against four other badasses he'd have lost dog that's the point the movie is making this is why oppose needed because Tai long has grown too strong even the furious five can't beat him and don't say four of the five there mantis moved the bridge the way he did which helped them so all of them work together but even they couldn't stop him that should have killed him right is he dead I'm willing to suspend disbelief for animal Kung Fu scenes that involve a mantis holding up a giant rope Bridge filled with tigers and leopards but smacking into the Rocks like that is gonna bust up a skull never mind hypocrisy why is the nerve attack accompanied with a Pink Floyd laser show on the recipient's body nobody cares also why not just kill them I'll allow Shifu to explain why tylon doesn't kill them kill Ed could come back here and strike fear into our hearts but it won't work uh it might I mean a little I'm pretty scared yep he paralyzed four of the five and left the flying one to return them home but somehow also allowed all that to happen before his own arrival paralyze these four and then what wait in the bushes for a while watch Netflix the [ __ ] did this guy wait around so long for and if you tell me it's so the five would all make it home in time to make the battle a challenge I'll tell you he's the worst bad guy ever he doesn't want to win he [ __ ] wants to lose but only when facing everyone oh my gosh Tai long wants to make them afraid of him it even works on Poe I am so sick of repeating these points he's too fast sorry Pope for those of you keeping score at home that's five lines for Mr Chan no that wasn't you even played a clip of monkey saying this and he also said this is that was his eighth line so you are a liar come little one let's find your mama maybe they realized they didn't give Jackie Chan enough to say as this movie went on so they wrote in some complete sentences for him even though what he says still contributes nothing to the story oh wait you said that last line was his Fifth Line and then he showed him say this which makes six but you've said at least three times that Jackie Chan has seven lines you can't even lie correctly to make something special you just have to believe it's special ah the old there's actually nothing special about blank you just have to believe in yourself cliche which is a great message and it's something I'm glad this movie did but when Oogway said otherwise what did you do this flashback of Oogway saying no is different from the other flashback of uguay saying no did Oogway tell Shifu in Tai long that he couldn't have the dragon scroll two separate times or was Tigris just completely making up that previous flashback in her own mind the flashback that Tigers had just showed not liking Tai lungs fighting the flashback that Tai Lung showed is the scene where Uruguay said no there's a terrible draft at the hall of Warriors someone should shut a window so those Peak tree pedals stop coming in you do realize there is a big hole in the front door right holy [ __ ] that building was brittle the goose picker rabbit that conducted the building inspection clearly didn't check the load-bearing studs how is it you still don't realize that Tai long is super strong Matrix bandolutions Jeremy makes a pop culture reference Poe basically jar jars himself through this entire movie wow literally two in a row you wanna get something to eat so now the pill is officially the Dragon Warrior he and Shifu have the same relationship as College roommates judging by the next movie which again came out before this video this is wrong gosh darn it this is maybe the most times I've ever repeated myself in a video ever oh boy

Channel: Captain Vader

Views: 4,554

Keywords: #CinemaSins, #KungFuPanda, #JackBlack, #DreamWorks

Id: CZGHT2TgDeA

Length: 20min 29sec (1229 seconds)

Published: Sat Jul 22 2023