Equanimity: How’d Everyone Get So Sensitive || Dave Chappelle

i told you i'm dope [ __ ] i told you i was gonna say and you still didn't see it coming and that's why i make the big bucks oh my god but there's more important reason that i would stop doing comedy right now and this reason is the real reason that's been percolating and it really is the crowd not you i'm talking about the crowd on the big stage it's too hard to entertain a country whose ears are so brittle [ __ ] are so sensitive the whole country is turned into bitch-ass [ __ ] everything you say upset somebody you know i can remember when it all started it was when i was doing chappelle show when i was doing chappelle show i just do the show and then on the weekends i do like concerts and [ __ ] like that so i'm doing a concert and there was a couple in the front row beautiful couple the wife wife was obviously asian you can see it in her face the husband this [ __ ] was mysterious to say the least couldn't quite pinpoint where he was from caramel colored fella very nice hair but it could have been from anywhere bangladesh mexico i can't guess with a [ __ ] like this all i knew for sure about this guy is that his wife was a [ __ ] i could see that in her face too no he was laughing and having a good time and she was scowling at me at a goddamn comedy show i couldn't figure it out and then i realized at some point that she was pregnant and i was smoking on stage i said oh my god that's probably why she's mad so i started to put my cigarette out but then she hit me with one of them fake non-smoker calls so i just kept smoking i thought to myself [ __ ] that babe would be fine relax and i tried to break the tension i just asked her that's all i said i go hey where you guys from anyway and i could tell that she was on to me she goes very condescendingly she says i'm from california if you are asking my ethnicity i am chinese and her husband was just cool about this [ __ ] he was like a mexican bro i said well i'm sorry if i offended you by asking but you're a very beautiful couple and miss there's no question that you're gonna give birth to the hardest working baby this world has ever seen that's not a bad joke she got very upset she got up to leave immediately but she didn't just leave she had to take one last dig at me on the way out i will never buy one of your [ __ ] dvds again dave chappelle i said ma'am with all due respect chinese people don't buy dvds [Applause] and the crowd went crazy we've all laughing having a good time i didn't even think anything of it and then just three days later this lady sends a [ __ ] letter to my promoter telling him not to book me for shows anymore because i was quote racist huh and i'm quoting her insensitive to the nature of my interracial marriage i was like word [ __ ] i was if she had just done a little bit of research she would know that i myself am in an interracial marriage that's right fact my wife is asian too surprised [ __ ] i'll see you on thanksgiving but my wife's not chinese she's filipino that's right that's right and our kids are puerto ricans somehow so there you go i don't give a [ __ ] about interracial in fact you know what my mother is half white a lot of people don't know that right you were a little too excited but okay a lot of people don't believe me when i say that but it's true you can't tell looking at me but if i grew my hair out you would think he was at a [ __ ] cat williams concert my shoes my [ __ ] is beautiful but [ __ ] are just taking it too far i don't know why or how everybody got this goddamn sensitive you know who hates me the most the transgender community yo yeah these [ __ ] i mean i didn't realize how bad it was these [ __ ] i was really mad about that last netflix special

Channel: Dave Chappelle Stand-Up

Views: 815,491

Rating: 4.9320745 out of 5

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Id: XtgkB26A_sU

Length: 5min 10sec (310 seconds)

Published: Mon Sep 07 2020