Democratic National Convention: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

the 2016 election or as it's commonly known a horrifying glimpse at Satan's Pinterest boards 2016 this week was the Democratic National Convention and after the bizarre Republican circus that preceded it all they really had to do was not appear like a complete disaster and yet somehow good evening their party's chairman off the program an apparent Russian email hack and that will revolt among Bernie Sanders supporters welcome to day one of the Democratic National Convention that was day one day one the DNC got off to the roughest start that I've seen since Fox fives 2011 coverage of the San Diego Boat Show good morning everybody I'm hanging out with my friend John Fox 5 Morning News starts look over there and it starts right now [Applause] that is basically what happened on day 1 of the DNC in a nutshell because because before debbie Wasserman Schultz could even gavel in the convention a leaked email scandal had forced her to resign and Bernie Sanders supporters gave her a rough reception when she met with her own States delegation I'm sorry disruptive borderline unhinged and getting ready to vote that is literally the only Florida that we know the only way that could be anymore Florida is if one of the Bernie delegates was an aging heavily armed racist alligator now luckily for the Democrats things gradually got back on track thanks to a series of stirring speeches beginning with the first lady today I wake up every morning in a house that was built by slaves and and I watched my daughter's too beautiful intelligent black young women playing with their dogs on the White House lawn now whatever your party affiliation that is a truly moving speech the only thing I would say to the audience is maybe don't start your round of applause directly following the phrase built by slaves oh they did a lovely job they had to they had to do a good job they they had to that's why lovely now the next day it was Bill Clinton's turn to fire up the crowd retelling his relationship with Hillary seemingly in real time and then Wednesday on Wednesday Joe Biden spoke assuming the role of America's motivational cattle-prod we are America second to none and we own the finish line don't forget it god bless you all may God protect our troops come on once he has left the White House Biden is going to be the most inspiring soul cycle instructor ever come on bundle you own the finish line come on don't you like the way Biden was actually the warm-up man for the president who like many speakers throughout the week occasionally lapsed into a tone of actual disbelief at what America might be considering doing this election people outside of the United States do not understand what's going on in this election they really don't that's actually true the rest of the world does not understand Trump's candidacy any more than they understand the menu at Guy Fieri's American kitchen this a donkey saucer is it made from actual donkey why do you do this to yourself but the emotional highlight of the convention was undoubtedly a speech by Kaiser comm a lawyer immigrant and father of a fallen Muslim American soldier Donald Trump you're asking Americans to trust you with their future let me ask you have you even read the United States Constitution I will I will gladly lend you oh that is an American founding document being inspirationally used as a middle finger and it wasn't even the most devastating part of mr. Karnes speech have you ever been to Arlington Cemetery go look at the graves of brave Patriots who died defending United States of America you will see all faiths genders and ethnicities you have sacrificed nothing Wow that engendered in me a level of emotion that I did not think was possible after 16 months of this depressing campaign and 39 years on earth as a British person and yet the true theories however incredible the surrogate speeches are conventions are really judged by the performances of the two people on the party's ticket so how did they fare well let's start with Tim Kaine a human sweater vest he's he's basically the portrait of a vice president that came with the frame his speech his speech is exactly as boring as you would expect with the exception of his almost impressively bad Trump impression it's going to be great believe me we're gonna build a wall and make Mexico pay for it believe me we're gonna destroy Isis so fast believe me what the was that that doesn't sound like him at all how is this man gonna win an election if he couldn't even win a game of cranium is it Jackie Gleason Brad Garrett kicked him just mold whoever it is out of clay we have no chance here and as for Hillary Clinton on the night of her historic nomination she stood before the nation in full pitbull cosplay she had a genuinely stupid amount of balloons dropped on her head and in between delivered a speech focusing on the actual job requirements of being president I sweat the details of policy whether we're talking about the exact level of lead and the drinking water in Flint Michigan the number of mental health facilities in Iowa or the cost of your prescription drugs because it's not just a detail if it's your kid if it's your family it's a big deal it was a kind of interesting approach instead of soaring rhetoric the bulk of her speech was basically I'm gonna micromanage the out of this office I'm gonna get granular as now drop the balloons and I will count them all I'm all about the details it was definitely a restrained speech to close a convention especially when you compare it to the week before when Donald Trump essentially opened his mouth and exhaled a swarm of locusts but now that both conventions are behind us maybe we should try and take stock of what they have taught us about the current state of our two political parties the DNC showed the Democrats to be a coalition of constantly squabbling if fundamentally like-minded Katy Perry fans and as for the RNC it showed that the Republican Party doesn't seem to currently exist because to all intents and purposes we didn't really get a Republican convention this year sure there was a cleveland-based gathering of delegates featuring all of Donald Trump's favorite family members and Tiffani and celebrities whose most notable upcoming projects include the Emmy Awards in memoriam reel probably but but almost everything that you would expect from a GOP convention was absent many prominent Republicans chose to skip it as did both living Republican former presidents and for the party of Reagan the tongue was unusually and relentlessly negative not only have our citizens endured domestic disaster but they've lived through one international humiliation after another one after another what is he even talking about only one major international humiliation from recent history comes to mind and it's the ones standing behind that podium wide open to pick up the mantle of people who actually like living here don't let anyone ever tell you that this country isn't great that somehow we need to make it bring it again because this right now is the greatest country on Earth yes the greatest country on Earth you hear that Denmark you got Ilsa yeah I don't care what the world's happiness index says Michelle Obama told me that we're number one and her arms make me feel safe so unusually the DNC felt like the more patriotic occasion it featured America's greatest actress dressed up like a plastic tablecloth from the 4th of July and General John Allen's screaming at people to our enemies we will pursue you as only America can you will fear us and to Isis and others we will defeat you who who were you shouting at Isis is not watching the DNC they're watching Braxton Family Values it's Thursday fool but but that is think about it that is a retired four-star Marine general threatening vaguely defined enemies while a crowd wave signs reading USA that is not something you expect to see and a Democratic convention not because Democrats aren't patriotic but because Republicans have always done that louder and longer this whole two weeks felt topsy-turvy it's frankly no wonder that commentators felt a little confused but if you were a Martian and you came down and looked at these two conventions and somebody asked you which of the two parties is the most overtly patriotic yeah you would say the Democratic Party okay but if you were a Martian who landed on Earth and someone asked you which party seemed more patriotic you would probably say wait that's your question I'm literally an alien is that nothing else you want to ask me how was your trip for example or what was tilda swinton like as a kid usually I'm at like usually people's first question for me is why is your penis made of pure glowing white light but the reason the Republican Party essentially forgot to celebrate America this year might be because they were too busy celebrating Donald Trump's claims that he would fix whatever Donald Trump thinks is wrong with America nobody knows the system better than me [Applause] which is why I alone can fix it when I take the oath of office next year I will restore law and order to our country I am your voice now now I am your voice is actually a fair claim he does speak for some people although you were kind of hope that they would then react the way most people do when they hear their own voice which is to say oh I don't actually sound like that do I that is King a horrified the RNC taught us that a party which used to be organized around a set of shared principles is currently organized around one man and given that that is the case his judgment is pretty much the only thing that is important when considering who to vote for in November so to that end I would like to show you something he said recently and before I do he has clearly said countless awful things throughout this campaign any of which would disqualify any other candidate just this week he declined yet again to release his tax returns lies about getting a letter from the NFL agreeing with him that the debate shouldn't clash with football games called Angela Merkel and employed that Brazil brought the Zika virus on themselves and encouraged a foreign powers hack of his political rival now two of those didn't happen but you're not sure which two and that's kind of the point isn't it because Trump hasn't said one crazy thing he said thousands of crazy things each of which blunts the effect of the others it's the bed of dales principle if you step on one nail it hurts you if you step on a thousand nails no single one stands out and you're fine that is how Donald Trump has managed to say pretty much anything in this campaign seemingly without consequences and yet even with that caveat his response when asked about that speech from Kizza Khan stands out I saw him he was you know very emotional and probably look like a nice guy to me his wife if you look at his wife she was standing there she had nothing to say she probably maybe she wasn't allowed to have anything to say you tell me but plenty of people have written that she she was extremely quiet and it looked like she had nothing to say okay for a start his wife has explained that she chose not to speak because she gets too upset when she sees images of her dead son's face you but I'm sorry I'm sorry please continue he said you have sacrificed nothing and no one well that sounds who wrote that did Hilary's scriptwriters write it how would you answer that father what sacrifice have you made for your country I think I made a lot of sacrifices I worked very very hard I've created thousands and thousands of jobs tens of thousands of jobs built great structures I've done I've had I've had tremendous success I think those are sacrifices oh sure I think they're sacrifices no no absolutely not they are self-serving half-truths from a self-serving half man who has somehow convinced half the country that sacrifice is the same thing as success honestly the main takeaway from these two weeks is that incredibly we may be on the brink of electing such a damaged sociopathic narcissist that the simple presidential duty of comforting the families of fallen soldiers may actually be beyond his capabilities and I genuinely did not think that that was a part of the job that someone could be bad at and now this and finally this week some more highlights from the Democratic National Convention to hell with Trump's American Nightmare we believe in the American dream the right-wing has thrown everything at Hillary not only the kitchen sink not only the stove but the refrigerator and the toaster stood for the macro issues and those macaroni and cheese issues put down your pokemons go for just a second her name and Donald Trump do our dirty dozen list dirty dangerous denying Donald shade boy and it's true I haven't really got the bolo tie look to catch on she was the first person to call me when my second child was born I heard no it says about my family but Hillary on oh she loves HGTV and she can devour buffalo wings whether on a car plane or train [Applause] it's healing time it's hope time is Hildred time it's healing time is hope time it's hildreth time it in several times is home time if his room time is healing time is her [Music] you better listen to me I said she will stay cold [Applause]

Channel: LastWeekTonight

Views: 10,812,661

Keywords: last week tonight, last week tonight with john oliver, john oliver, dnc, democratic national convention, hbo

Id: BUCnjlTfXDw

Length: 18min 10sec (1090 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 31 2016

Reddit Comments

[u/Bob_Swarleymann]

Jeg var godt nok vild med John Oliver i sæson 1, da han tacklede de fleste no-brainer sager.

Men så snart han snakker om sager hvor der er to reelle synspunkter, så er han helt ufattelig træls. Han formår på ingen måde at dække sagen fra begge synspunkter.

Da han dækkede flygtningekrisen var han indbegrebet af en cafe latte overklasse gut, der aldrig ville mærke konsekvenserne af noget, men som bare skulle score moralske point.

Han ville være meget meget bedre, hvis han kunne dække begge sider af en sag.

[u/laur0864]

John [NUVÆRENDE ÅR] på spil igen

[u/xyzerb]

We poke fun only because Denmark's awesome and nobody would believe otherwise. It's also fun to trigger people that truly believe the US is the best at everything.

[u/VLTRS]

Don't worry, Denmark. You win. In the USA, most of our politicians don't care about our health or education. There are places here that look like a third world country, in almost every major city. There are people here working for multi-billion dollar corporations who can barely feed their families and pay rent, and a lot of people have been brainwashed into being OK with that. People still believe in the Jesus gods here and they want to force other people to live according to their fucked up morals by trying to make things like abortion illegal, but they can easily see how dumb it is when other religions do it. You're definitely better off. People think this is the greatest country in the world, and it is awesome, for me and many others. It is an awesome country, but it's not even the best country in North America. I'm talking about Canada, it's way better than the US. Mexico sucks. Mexico is a country where the rich live in willful ignorance of the poor. It's like what the US will turn into if we let keeping these rich fuckers control us. Mexico is heaven if you have money and hell if you're born without it. Anyway, keep living the dream.

[u/Armenian-Jensen]

Nr 2 efter USA?..

Det kan jeg egentlig godt leve med.

[u/invisi1407]

great =/= happiest

As I remember it, we're the happiest country on earth, not the greatest, but who's counting.

[u/[deleted]]

Elsker at amerikansk TV altid viser Nyhavn hver gang de taler "Denmark".

[u/bajsgreger]

Första gången jag håller med honom. Ni kan gå och ta er danskefaen!

[u/Pyrross]

Thanks for sharing xD