Creed Blackmails Everyone - The Office

Video Statistics and Information

Video
Captions Word Cloud
Reddit Comments

Is this like a deleted episode?

👍︎︎ 2 👤︎︎ u/albinosquirrel09 📅︎︎ Aug 10 2020 đź—«︎ replies
Captions
If you're watching this video, you've been a very naughty person. I have learned some of your deepest, darkest secrets. And with this knowledge, I have the ability to ruin your world But it needn't come to that. It's possible I could forget a thing or two if you're willing to compensate me. I'm 100% serious. Pay me now, or I will share this with the world. Are my eyes blue? -Are you trying to blackmail me? -"Blackmail" is an ugly word I prefer "extortion." -Why are you doing this? -How much will you pay me to find out? -Creed, this is low. -Easy on the sass. We're just two amigos having a conversation. Comprende? -[ Speaks Spanish ] -What? Let's switch back to English for a sec. -Okay, just spit it out. What do you have on me? -Why don't I just show you -What is it? -Well, I don't remember exactly, but I'm sure you're not gonna like it. Oh, yeah. The sex tape. Okay, there's you. Your little friend. And this is where it gets good -He spliced in footage from the film "Milk." Totally ruined Gus Van Sant' masterpiece for me. This is pathetic. You're pathetic. -Well, that's just plain mean, man. The world's a different place than the one my grandchildren grew up in. This is an age of information where truth is a commodity I tried to get money out of lies. Shame on me. From now on, I'm only extorting people who I have real dirt on -Oh. -Juicy, huh? I hope this doesn't affect our friendship. -What are you gonna do with this? -It depends on you, my friend. You can make a small contribution to the William Charles Schneider memorial fund, you can make this all go away, or else... -You're gonna kill me? -That's probably the wrong gesture. I was trying to indicate that it would be very bad for you -That was the wrong gesture, 'cause that is like k-- It's like I'm gonna slit your throat. -No, I'm not gonna do that -If it's bad, you just be like "Unh-unh." You know, like... -Alright, alright. Enough of this small talk, okay? Are you going to pay me or not -I don't know, Creed. I'm, like, really freaked out and confused. -Make up your mind quickly Or else... -I don't know what I'm gonna do, and I'm freaking out. And I haven't freaked out about a decision like this since.. I had to choose between Here Comes Treble, Treble in Paradise, The Trebleshooters, and The Finger Lake Maestros -What's it gonna be? -Oh, wow! You're so gratuitously creepy, Creed. Do you know that? -Thank you. -You know what it's gonna be In about two seconds, you're not gonna have anything to lord over me. Excuse me. I have an announcement to make And that announcement is, look at this. Okay? Just look! Yes, I do have a tattoo. I got it during my semester at sea. -You have a tramp stamp? -No, Kelly, I don't have a tramp stamp No, I don't have a tramp stamp Yes, it does happen to be on my lower back. Yes, it does mean Nard Dog No, I don't regret it. Yes, I am having it laser removed. -This blackmail game is hard work. I'm gonna need a little nap. -Frank is finally paying me child support. No. Jake's biological father is, too. [ Laughs ] Yeah. I bought myself a kegerator. Well, we kind of got to drink at home 'cause I can't drive anymore 'cause of my DUI. -I feel great after that nap Totally refreshed. Ready to blackmail that Indian chick. Hey, girl. We don't talk much anymore -I know! Oh, my God. I'm so angry with my sisters right now. -Why don't we talk about this picture? I don't think you want anybody to see this. -Creed, this is the profile picture on my MySpace page I kissed a girl, and... I didn't really like it, but I do love the attention that the photo gets me. -According to your Twitter report, you skipped work and went to a Honas Brothers concert in Philadelphia. -Do you mean the Jonas Brothers? -I believe the "J" is silent Oh, I've been taking some introductory Spanish classes down at the community hall Comprende, amigo? And if you want me to be silent, I'm gonna need a little something from you. -Creed, I cannot lose my job I have so much credit card debt. -I want a helicopter. -I can't afford that! -Well, then I want commodities I want gold, oil, political capital, four-leaf clovers bones, information, uranium. -Do you mean information like facts? -No. Like gossip. -What do you want to know? -Who's Pastor Davis? -You can't do this to us. We're all going to stand united against you. -We're going to report you -You don't have the balls. -You want to see balls? Watch this. Toby! Please come in here. Creed has been blackmailing all of us, and now you need to do something about it. -They're all liars! And they will pay up. -This is a serious accusation. I can't do anything without proof. -We have proof. -We have proof. -There's some guidelines about this, and I don't -- Because of -- Mmm... -What? What are you saying? -It's just more of a m-mumble. -Did you just say the word "mumble"? -I think I was clear. -I have an idea. I realized something. There's got to be dirt on Creed. -What's the dealio? You schmucks decide to pay me? -Creed, we've learned a thing or two about your past. Interested? I spent some time online searching "Creed Bratton." And I found enough for a pretty strong presentation -According to this interview you were Janis Joplin's dealer Years later, you moved to Shanghai to make anti-democracy films -Confucius is a fool! We grow fat on greed! -When you returned to the U.S. you introduced the walking snakehead fish into the North American ecosystem. -True. -On several occasions, you've thrown raves in our warehouse! Notice Creed Bratton, known to the kids as "Papa Smurf." -Alright, let's stop it right there. The statute of limitations is 50 years. Most of this stuff is irrelevant right now. -You have as much to lose as we do. -I'm going to set myself on fire if you don't pay me. -What?! -Do you want this on your conscience? -Creed! Who has time for this?! -I got time. -Wow. -What? -I didn't want to pay on principle, but I think Creed really needs some money. All he wants is $6 or its equivalent in postage stamps or canned goods -You know, I give up. It's not worth a day. -Who can loan me 6 bucks? -Creed, I'm gonna get my checkbook, okay? -Well, now I can buy that helicopter I've always wanted. An amazing price. And I'm gonna fly that sucker down to Brazil, head down the Amazon. Apparently there's the world's largest bookstore there.
Info
Channel: The Office
Views: 2,405,992
Rating: 4.9503102 out of 5
Keywords: creed the office, creed as manager, creed blackmail, thats what she said, fire drill, asian jim, did i stutter, no god no, theme song, funniest office, office jim, office dwight, office michael, office clips, watch office, scotts tots, Entertainment, TV Series, Celebrities, Comedy, Funny, Hilarious, Comedian, the office, office nbc, full episodes, bloopers, cpr, funniest moments, pranks, theme, parkour, best moments, scranton, dunder mifflin, steve carell, jenna fischer, jim pam
Id: I4FXzSPbVKE
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 8min 12sec (492 seconds)
Published: Thu Apr 09 2020
Related Videos
Note
Please note that this website is currently a work in progress! Lots of interesting data and statistics to come.