Fallout 4 changed the Fallout franchise in
a number of big ways, but arguably the biggest change is in the game’s weapon system. Every weapon can be modified to suit your
play style. But there’s a weapon that doesn’t really
fit in with the missile launchers, fully automatic rifles, and nuclear warheads. Can You Beat Fallout 4 With Only An Inflatable
Mallet? Can You Beat Fallout 4 With Only A Commie
Whacker? I awoke in the bathroom and discovered how
truly beautiful I am. The SPECIAL setup for this run is relatively
standard for a Melee-only playthrough. Lots of points in Strength and Endurance,
some in Luck to get the Idiot Savant perk later on, and the rest don’t matter too
much. After the Great War, I found the first problem. Because this is a Commie Whacker only playthrough,
I can’t use my fists or any of the weapons available in Vault 111. It wouldn’t be so bad if the Radroaches
weren’t so damn annoying. You can’t pick up the Pip-Boy if you’re
“in combat”. Put another way, you can’t simultaneously
pick up the Pip-Boy and be a tasty snack for the roaches. Unfortunate. We could forgo the Pip-Boy for a little while
and glitch ourselves out of the Vault. But that’s too easy. Instead, I lured the roaches down the hall,
sprinted back through a door and the other end of the hall, and closed the door behind
me. Then I crouched, waited until I was hidden,
picked up the Pip-Boy, and left the vault. Now there’s the issue of finding a Commie
Whacker. Sure, I could just spawn one with console
commands, but that’s boring. So I’ll have to travel to Nuka World to
find one. The first thing I did was return to Sanctuary
to get another SPECIAL point. Then it was off to Nuka World. The recommended level to be at before you
enter Nuka World is 30. I’m level 2. The journey to the DLC entrance was long and
hard, just like the shaft of the Commie Whacker. The next issue was actually getting into Nuka
World. There are Gunners patrolling the area, not
a big deal, but the Assaultron is something to be concerned about. I ran inside the train station and got fucked
to death by the Assaulton’s mouth. Why didn’t I just use Stimpaks and run like
hell? Because, my dear boy, I didn’t have any
Stimpaks. I forgot them. After that shitshow, I backtracked to Vault
111 to pick of a few Stimpaks that were lying around. But I knew that would not be enough. I’d need some sort of Powered Armor. On the way to said Powered Armor I stole a
lot of tomatoes from a farm, I let Preston kill the Raiders outside the Museum of Freedom,
picked up a Fusion Core, and left Preston to die in the Museum of Freedom as I ran to
the roof and stole the Power Armor. I had armor. I had supplies, I had a pocket full of room-temperature
tomatoes, I had everything I’d need to get through Nuka World. The Assaultron once again tried to get inside
my pants, but the Power Armor protected me and hiding in the train station threw her
off my trail long enough for me to restore power to the train and be on my way to the
greatest amusement park ever devised. After arriving in Nuka World, I had to traverse
the Gauntlet of Extreme Pain Mayhem and Misfortune. All things being equal, it wasn’t that bad. The wooden floor falling out was annoying,
the turrets constantly shooting were a pain, and the gas room pissed me off because a bunch
of Radroaches pinned me against a wall and tried to do things to my fanny. But I got through it all with only a few hundred
scratches. Next came the boss battle in which my only
weapon was a Squirt Gun. And as you can probably imagine, this is where
things took a very dark turn. In order to proceed, you must kill Overboss
Colter. Luckily, the Squirt Gun does no damage, but
there is no way to get around this fight. To answer the titular question, no, you can’t
beat Fallout 4 with only a Commie Whacker, because you can’t get the Commie Whacker
without killing someone with something that isn’t a Commie Whacker. Well, it’s not the end of the world. I’ve had runs in the passed with a single
segment that can’t be beaten, like the Guilty Spark fight in Halo 3. So, I decided to say F the system and kill
Overboss Colter. I had a Switchblade which could be a suitable
replacement, but my thinking was that if it’s not a Commie Whacker, it doesn’t really
matter what it is. I used an assortment of the weapons I’d
picked up to laid Colter to rest, became the new Overboss, entered the Nuka-Cade, and finally
found my Commie Whacker. It’s as beautiful as I thought it would
be. Actually that was a lie because the textures
on it are shitty. Probably a result of the mods I have installed
that up the resolution of the game’s textures. Oh well. With an inflatable mallet in my hand, I left
Nuka World forever and returned to the Commonwealth to bonk some skulls. The first thing I did with my new found power
was enter the Museum of Freedom to kill the Raiders because I’d need the Minutemen later
to enter the Institute. I also learned that the Commie Whacker sounds
just like every other melee weapon. I was hoping for a squeak or something, not
the sound of a tire iron slamming on pavement like all the other weapons. Lame. After freeing the trapped settlers I was off
to Diamond City. Along the way, I settled the cats vs dogs
debate when I killed both a cat and a dog. I also entered ArcJet systems for some reason
and discovered that the Institute hadn’t been there yet, so there was nothing in there
for me to do. Before I found Diamond City I passed by Park
Street Station, so I saved some time by going down into the subway station first to free
Nick Valentine. The Triggermen fault valiantly, but none are
a match for Mr Mandelbaum and his mallet. Holy fuck why didn’t I name myself Eustace
Bagge? With Nick Valentine free, the only thing standing
between me and leaving Park Street Station are Skinny Malone and his gang of hooligan
fooligans. I pumped myself full of chems and beat the
fuck out of them all with me mallet. Here’s the cool part about rescuing Nick
before going to Diamond City: you don’t have to listen to Piper argue with security
guy, you can just walk right in and ignore Piper on your way to Nick’s office. But before entering Nick’s office, I sold
every weapon and bullet I had to get an ample supply of Stimpaks and Radaway, as well as
a chest piece that gave +1 to both Agility and Perception. And I did keep the Squirt Gun because I will
never part with that. After describing to Nick my situation, I bribed
the Mayor’s assistant to get the key to Kellogg’s office, I took Nick as a companion,
and after an incredible journey together that lasted maybe 5 seconds, we parted ways when
left to follow Dogmeat as he tracked Kellogg. Dogsteak led me to Fort Hagen where, again,
Dogham followed me inside despite me telling him to piss off back to where he came from. With the perks and armor I had, the Synths
weren’t much of a challenge, though they were annoying at times because melee combat
in Fallout 4 sucks. I used the same tactic with Kellogg as I did
with Skinny Malone, which was chems and me mallet. After thoroughly searching every pocket Kellogg
had, and I do mean every pocket, I returned to Diamond City and spoke to Nick and Piper
about what to do next. They agreed that going to Goodneighbor was
the most okay-ish option available. And when I arrived in Goodneighbor I introduced
Finn to my mallet. The two got to know each other pretty well. Then I entered Kellogg’s brain and ate a
shitty microwave breakfast sandwich while sparkles did his thing. Next came the Glowing Sea. I bought a Hazmat Suit, stored some stuff
in Sanctuary, and was off to Virgil’s Cave. The Children of Atom might have looked at
me funny, I don’t know I couldn’t see through the hazmat suit, but I assumed that
they did and killed them all. Then I got the plans from Virgil and fast-traveled
back to C.I.T Ruins where I ignored the radio station and ventured towards Greenwich Genetics. The suicidal bitch with a missile launcher
was, as the name suggests, a bitch to deal with, but the rest of the Gunners inside were
cake manure. I approached the Courser with caution and
looked on in amazement as a battle took place between two invisible people. I assume it was incredible, I couldn’t tell
what was going on. But in the end, the Courser died, as did the
hostages, and I was told by Doctor Amari to find the Railroad. I knew what she meant, she pretty much begged
me to kill the Railroad, which is what I did. Glory was the only one who posed an actual
threat. PAM could have been tough, but she ran away
when I started bonking her on the head. I then analyzed the Courser Chip myself, got
the plans from Virgil, and returned to the Museum of Freedom to talk to Sturges. But I couldn’t get Sturges to look at the
plans until they were at Sanctuary. And I couldn’t get them to go to Sanctuary
until the Raiders outside the Museum were dead. Luckily, by doing things in the weird order
that I did, the Brotherhood were in the area and proved to be great at being bait for both
the Raiders and the Deathclaws. I only had to pick off a few Raiders before
I talked to Preston and discovered that a settlement needs my help. I helped them all right, I helped them by
ending their worthless lives. I told Preston that they weren’t interested
in joining the Minutemen, he rambled on about dead people or something, and finally the
topic shifted from being all about him to all about me when he asked about the plans
I mentioned earlier. Sturges looked at the plans, I built all the
science mumbo-jumbo, and emailed myself inside the Institute. As you may have guessed by my lack of doing
stuff for other factions, I decided to side with the Institute this time around. As disappointing as it was to see that my
son looks nothing like me, I pushed onward and met with the people in charge of things
in the Institute and got my first mission: track down a rouge synth and bring it home. I would have preferred to not do this in a
radiation storm, but when do I ever get what I want. The mission was a success and Father drowned
me in his thick creamy praise. The synth re, re-get, regretting, re-getting
mission was more like a practice round than anything important, as what came next was
the Battle of Bunker Hill. Lots of fighting, lots of death, my kind of
party. You’re supposed to run around the back side
of Bunker Hill, but I didn’t want to do that so I just jumped on a bus and hopped
the fence, fought my was passed a few Brotherhood Knights, and used the four reset codes to
put the synths in sleep mode. I spoke to Father atop CIT Ruins, it was a
real bitch to get up there by the way, and then we spoke again inside the Institute where
he gave me the best present a father could ask for: my son as a terminal illness and
is going to die. I couldn’t be happier because I don’t
think he’s actually my son. He doesn’t have my nose or my horribly mutated
vomit-inducing facial features. Regardless, we have work to do. Well, I have work to do, he’s getting busy
with the dying and whatnot. I transmitted to Mass Fusion where I bonked
a lot of Brotherhood Scribes with me mallet and retrieved the Beryllium Agitator. And then came the robots. Fucking machines. With the help of a Stealth Boy I was able
to land a few Sneak hits on the Sentry Bot, but the Assaultrons must have been friends
of PAM because they were not nice to me. Some time ago I had installed saw blades on
my inflatable mallet, probably not the smartest idea I’ve ever had, but they came in handy
here because the Assaultrons bled like the robotic humanoid dogs they are. I traveled back to the Institute, gave the
Agitator to, uh, whatever her name is, and was told by Father that there was something
I needed to do to a house, or in a house, or something. I followed the waypoint and had to convince
some little shitstain to come out of the closet and travel with scientists into an underground
bunker with unfathomable technology where they assured he’d be safe. The end is near. I can smell it with my giant fucking nose. I returned to the Institute and delivered
a message to the Commonwealth, then I went to Diamond City and did the thing with the
buttons and the dials and the switches to beef up the transmitter. I then activated the reactor in the basement
to ensure that I’d be able to heat up my chicken nuggets in the event of a power outage,
and received word of the last step. The Brotherhood of Steel must be destroyed. I was transported just outside the airport
and was tasked with infiltrating the base and destroying three generators. I did it with unimaginable grace, there was
little to no wasted motion, every swing of my mallet calculated and executed with ungodly
precision. Just kidding. I closed my eyes and swung wildly at the big
metal men. All that’s left is to infect Liberty Prime
with communist propaganda and the victory will be claimed in the name of science! The Brotherhood sent everything they had at
me and the synths. Even Elder Maxson himself arrived on the scene. I’m not sure what happened to him. I think he slipped and fell off the roof or
something. Regardless, I was teleported, against my will
mind you, away to safety where I watched the Prydwen go down in flames. Prydwen? More like Prydwas, get it? Get it? Get it? Well, that’s pretty much it for this adventure. I spoke to Father one last time, thought this
time I took off my sunglasses and donned my Sea Captain’s Hat as a sign of mutual respect
between myself and this old man who clearly isn’t my son. The game ended, and I did not beat Fallout
4 with only a Commie Whacker. I almost did, though. Maybe the real Commie Whacker was the friend
I made along the way. And that’s gonna do it for this video about
whether or not you can beat Fallout 4 with only a commie whacker. If you enjoyed the video or learned anything,
leave a Like. Leave a dislike if you didn’t enjoy the
video or didn’t learn anything. Follow me on Twitter @MittenSquad. My name is Paul of Mitten Squad. Have a wonderful day.
