Brilliant Idiots: My Nilla Va Nilla (Full Episode)

it's so stupid yeah Charlemagne the guy who show we are too brilliant idiot since days show is brought to you by Morgan and Morgan have you been injured in a car crash slip and fall or on the job you need a law firm that's big enough to challenge the largest insurance companies and corporations Morgan and Morgan have nearly 500 attorneys throughout the country and they've recovered billions of dollars for clients like you alright get America's largest personal injury law firm to fight for you with no upfront costs and it's free unless they win visit for two people calm now let's start to show do we have any church announcements Andrew yes st. Louis won't be there this weekend Friday Saturday helium comedy club then there's weekend's Matador tour brought to you by Monster Energy and outbreak we are in Ann Arbor Michigan on Friday then Saturday we are in San Francisco both shows sold out Sunday first show sold out we added a second one Sunday there might be some tickets left of that go get them the end result calm for all the rest of the show's New York Toronto Boston Chicago all selling interesting announcements coming up in the future some cool places I'm going to can't say just yet but we're getting out of the country is gonna be kind of wild so it was outbreak it is a I guess a promotional company they usually work with like I think they've done some comics but they usually work with like artists go Coachella makes you what will happen in herps ya need just want to Coachella next year cuz herpes ain't gonna stop nobody from going to Coachella you don't even got to worry about that alright what sold me now someone explained that to me did you hear about the word if you're in a large crowd yeah you're amongst to herpes outbreak bro and one and two people yeah come on yes like one into that must know any know what it's it's no it's one in 4:22 baby wanted to into nori 23 it's one for no one in three I'm telling you it's like one into one in three herpes simplex 1 is pimples 2 out of 3 under the age of 50 two out of three two out of three baby that's the O net better if they know snap that's clean they don't only wiped out have to play I don't know Harvey's gets a bad rap do I keep telling you that you got to change the stigma herpes it's just a skin disease like it's nothing serious like you want it I mean if you get it you get it and you don't have to be sexually transmitted either how does it get there how you how do you get some [ __ ] on your dick with that oh are you clean a toilet what if condoms were [ __ ] giving people Arby's and it was treating him [ __ ] like they treated [ __ ] some blankets in there back in the day with smallpox I was the real Trojan horse for her PA come on bro you don't want that if you know people who got it it's not that bad as a skin disease you got people who got it but you just [ __ ] between outbreaks but how do you know when the outbreak is there you got your share look at your oatmeal I heard it looks just like that herpes ain't stopping you from [ __ ] up in either by the way if it's there if you see it if you see it maybe what if a girl tells you like yo you know I got herpes and girls never told me that she has system so that's an ingrown hair and I bet okay that happens it's just a bump a bump is a bump drive right over it B Bobby we like Braille bro Jesus Christ is it having a misery you're gonna get a kick out of this so I have a massive hemorrhoid massive hemorrhage that's like butthole herpes in your ass outside outside of that and they're like a grape it's really his Wow I got the doctor's point today I might think it's surgery on my [ __ ] don't do it don't do it so yo here's the crazy thing herpy Nairobi's uh hemorrhoids it's like Fight Club bro it's like the second I started talking about I got all these DMS from my friends random people like y'all I've been there I've done the hemorrhoids thing it's awful don't get the surgery because it comes back well how do you get her hemorrhoids I don't know but this has just been growing on me straining straining really so I stopped the umbrella stop here fine sugar I've fixed my whole diet now I got a blueberry hanging on my ass you mean like straining when you [ __ ] I like when you live but sometimes I think I'll just sit on the toilet and I'll be on my phone now close the screen oh oh I've known that for years I don't scream when I [ __ ] wait I'm serious I don't at all [ __ ] they're like North Korean say about kim jeong-hoon boy he does not strain when he you got that toy that's all baby Chicken Little the [ __ ] is falling right out you [ __ ] so how did you notice it just started growing out my ass man really hanging it's like a piece of your ass is hanging out your ass right and then for a while I was just pushing it back in it's real I have to put these suppositories in my ass so I have to take a pill that's the size of a bullet yeah and I have to push it in my ass and wait wait wait wait wait wait you got a bullet for your ass got a bullet right in my ass so this is the craziest part right is you push it in and if you just around the rim your butthole like rejects it and shoots it out right well you get it past that room BAM Benito's really it welcomes the bathroom Oh every time okay okay yeah I'm up to like second knuckle that's the actual great mobile game now instead of [ __ ] uh is that a fruit ninja our [ __ ] simple right you push the [ __ ] Burberry back in somebody's foot oh boy back in the butthole to get it past the room it's awful dude it's really bad how'd you get it Chris same way I got it really bad actually had to go to the hospital because my god in fact it filled up with blood yeah that's where - so the and they wanted to Dorsey nah I'm cool no I didn't want to see her Peas I don't wanna see her bro I got an [ __ ] no I can't believe if a girl said lick my [ __ ] like I saw a picture of it I was what you do what you bury Chris they they want to operate and I actually had me on a gurney going into the operating room and I was like something doesn't feel right because it was like an intern I was like a student doctor they didn't want to use me as a guinea pig yes report back to me [Music] I can't get out of my ass now we're even it's cover it's like a flap covering my [ __ ] so what do you got to do what did you do Christmas rubberband do the rubberband so I heard I guys said a hot bath yeah period premium Pete told me that but I thought it was like an old wives tale oh you got one of those like I forgot the type of bath it's like a drink you sit on it you got to shrink it down yeah you get the rubber band surgery they tie it off with the rubber band Rachael circulation right falls off so it's a mole no no it's it's a piece of your ass I've been taking this medicine but jam it up my ass nothing's happening yeah you're too far gone I think I'm too far gone it's at that point I would I would try them over Ben before you do the surgery because there's a very high chance for infection when you get to surgery oh I thought the rubberband was a surgery no no no no they wanted what they did to me in the hospitals they they cut it with the scalpel yeah pushed all the blood out and then what happens is it just comes back like twice as but yeah I'm not gonna do that yeah it was never gonna [ __ ] again the students awful it looks like I'm in a diaper about two weeks now it was crazy actually that's kind of fun yeah I was like 12 years old I actually was like I just wear a diaper bows likewise like you don't gotta like you know go to the bathroom just pee and then just sitting it cuz it absorbs it right it doesn't stay wet the diaper right yeah you can't compute that wrong then you get a diaper rash okay kids you can't have kids just sitting and they goddamn [ __ ] and faeces and pee and whatever else yeah when you say like that it makes more sense I'm just trying to figure out why I got [ __ ] growing out y'all ass y'all like the dragons on Game of Thrones growing tails and [ __ ] for what it's it's a little cute little tail yes Joe's boil it happens but it's nice see if you can get it down naturally but don't don't do the surgery I'm not gonna do all right fine I won't do surgery it's it's just a crazy painful experience that I have to go through but I'm I'm living my truth thank you you know what I mean I'm living my truth for all of us out there with the homies and as you know we talked about it yeah everybody comes out even war so I noticed guys love it they're like tell me more about him right people like grilli's wanna hear about y'all asses that could be a fear that guys have and they just want to talk to somebody who's like gaunt I've never thought about know what emerged was my farts man loud [Music] Charlemagne's been in DC doing like real political conniving what happened you've been seeing how the game works hold on one second all right yo that is that's the deep state saying not to say anything better not talk about me et imma made David gross so Kappa don't know what that is explain that it's where all the bigwigs hang out every senator in the country I think they convene there like once or twice a week if I'm not mistaken and I mean it's just interesting to be on Capitol Hill because you realize all of these people that you think are sworn enemies on goddamn TV they really just sitting around [ __ ] discussing their hemorrhoids and eating oatmeal and and drinking water and having a grand old time you like wait I thought he hated him and I thought she hated him but it's like it's not like that at all and it really just makes you realize that politics is just it's just big business at the end of the day like that's all it is and then oh it's being fun where the ones being [ __ ] like we're the only ones really really taking this [ __ ] stairs now I'm not saying they don't care no that's not what I'm saying I'm just saying that the heated debates that we get into amongst each other as a people they not doing it like that there but you know why they're not doing it like that day because they wouldn't be able to get anything done right now this the truth to the matter if it was all feelings and and it was just yelling and screaming at each other they would not be able to get anything done at least in that face those senators in those congressmen whoever else they at least know how to coexist peacefully right and order describe to get things done and I'd say what else is interesting but we all notice already both of them think they're right yeah they all think they know what's best for the country right and it's interesting because you know you sit down I like I might sit down with somebody like senator Tim Scott who's a black Republican from South Carolina from the low country and you know historically people have always called him my Uncle Tom and it's sellout just because he's a black Republican but when you sit down and have a conversation with him you realize he's the guy that was pushing opportunities on legislation to force you know are to give incentives for people to reinvest in in in the hood you know I'm saying oh he's the guy that was behind the black farmer bill he was the guy I was behind criminal justice reform prison reform in South Carolina so it's just interesting because we tend to profile people yes we know based off what their their party is what I told you all a long time ago I am voting my interest in 2020 and I'm not I've never considered myself part of a particular party but if you really pay attention to what both sides are saying you might find something that's that aligns with your interest on either side if you're willing to you know keep your ears open and listen I bet you would I bet most people would yeah nobody is strictly Democratic or strictly Republican ah not if you actually pay attention to what the what their issues are right you don't say because it's certain things that me that you may be into that like a Republican may be pushing right like I'm in the opportunity zone legislation I'm like I'm are I'm already but I've been buying property so I would not want to buy property that's gonna allow me to get some crazy tax incentives over the next decade right you know meanwhile I would not buy a property that possibly you know the government may invest in if it's a start-up business that had the potential to scale like why wouldn't I right be interested in it why wouldn't any entrepreneur be interested in today well so they and they often do yeah I think we do this weird thing where and it's just a secure votes but where if you you plan on voting for someone who's different than me mmm right I will take the worst part of that person's platform and then I'll project it on to you so let's say you're voting for this guy Tim Scott who's trying to do what is it opportunity for legislation black foam abilities not a lot of them because let's say you're a black farmer and you like these opportunities on things you're gonna vote for Tim Scott let's say Tim Scott also has another bill that says that he's you know anti abortion or something like that night that's why you hate women and that's why you don't think women deserve the right to choose or control their bodies any Bakewell there's nothing to do with that I just it just might be a bill that's intertwine with another bill well they might have nothing to do with each other yeah we'll take the worst part of both sides like Republicans do this the Dems all the time like why are you a communist why are you a socialist why do you want these what do you want to live like the Venezuela you see what happens to a country and then Democrats are like no I just kind of want to take care of old people and I'm my mom's old and I want her to be taken care of a Social Security role I agree with you I don't think the party should is whacked I think the party is a label broke and I think that you can get stereotyped and profile based off what would label you are so would you like a parliamentary system like I don't even know a Polynesian sauce is we have multiple party you could have five or six parties and then a coalition wins instead of just one party versus the other you might have I think the party should be of the people man but you need to organize people right because not everybody's want to read right so it's like you need to organize the people the parties into certain value sets that reflect the people right so it's like we're not all good most but some people imagine single mom she got three jobs she got time to read about all these [ __ ] big lazy she's not know what I'm saying that is kind of lazy especially being it think about what you're voting for you're voting for people to either lead your [ __ ] state yeah you know me lead your country yeah like shouldn't you do a little bit more due diligence than other than just some some [ __ ] bullet points you know yeah yes you should but that doesn't mean people are gonna like I don't even read the back of the label for the food and now I got hemorrhoids that is true but didn't you know the man within ten years we're not telling you hey you noticed it was bad for you all the law I just think that people should just be more invested in the people that's the question right so it's like maybe if there's more parties that this just one opportunity right maybe if there's more parties I think that's kind of what Chris was suggesting right that there would be something that was more reflective of what you exactly want it yeah right like what if there was a party that was just about farmers or just about workers like that exists and I think a lot of place like England has like a Workers Party and it should you just hey you work in class you working Factory you working some a union's auto technically so unions lobby both organizations okay right so it's like so you basically go a listen we're the party just for workers and we know that there are millions of workers out here and we're just gonna look out for your rights yeah we really don't care about nothing else right and that's what and now if your worker you like I read a great article I'm gonna tell you she just called me hold on I read I read a great article I'm Italian named in his art I just read this in the New York Times it was by this when you sent me oh did I send it to you with his job gone and auto worker wonders what am I the man did you read that part of it that [ __ ] was so dope because this guy voted for Trump but he's not a racist he's not a bigot he voted for Trump because he was like yo they gonna [ __ ] take my card was it forward Chevy oh yeah once I wanted to call one of the car manufacturers he's like a third-generation car manufacturer yeah you know saying so he's worked at this plant as grandfather work to deplane his father worked at this plant and Trump was like look y'all got to worry about nothing we gonna keep the plants going you good of cause he voted for his [ __ ] job that's his livelihood yep he caught I'm saying so but now you feel bad that he voted for Trump was trouble lied to him cuz now say the jobs are gone absolutely so he feels like that's what people feel like he got [ __ ] and he got screwed but the reason he voted for Trump made total sense to me and that's all I ever be saying when I'm like you when I when I want to have a conversation with somebody when somebody told me they supported Trump yeah yo tell me why that was a legit reason in that article he feels duped now and and eat furthermore like people how could so many women support Trump right it's like he probably got a wife right his wife one mean and he paid for but whatever do you mean you pay for Melania no so his wife if she doesn't have a job she her job is to take care of the family watch the kids she's like yo I want my husband I have a job so I'm a vote for the guy who's gonna keep my husband having a job the guy said in this article Trump was the only person talking directly to boom that's it that's it you read article Chris yeah reports of I mean that's that's not true it's what he perceived to be the only talking directly to him right nobody else was talking about it though in which is true they were he just didn't want to hear what there was Hillary dawg I don't know you think she's gonna run a whole campaign and not talk about jobs she didn't do the smart car manufacturing there's a little difference you know that you know certain jobs job of connecting with people telling them what they won to hear but if you had done any homework or studied this guy at all you would have known it was [ __ ] so yeah the guy got duped you didn't got played um I think the key is you know you're saying how do you get people engaged and how do you get them to pay attention we're all guilty if not really you know we just react to personalities not to actual policies for the most part to me it's like you got to get involved in the local level cuz in a lot of ways that's gonna impact your life I agree who the president is who's your city councilman who's your senator who's your Congress and you can actually impact those positions a lot more than presidency every four years like but we don't know that like we don't know who's representing us on the very you know local list of levels but that's that's what really impacts your life and that's so you can really get engaged but the point the point that I think sorrows' trying to say is people are for their interests so whether they're gonna vote for what their interests are and they're gonna vote for the people who lie to them tell them sir it doesn't matter but basically place those interests on the forefront absolutely and if Trump or anybody Reagan [ __ ] Clinton doesn't matter spoke about those interests better than their opponent or more effectively to that group in their opponent you can't be surprised if they vote for them and then what we do often is go oh you voted for that guy it's because you like grabbing [ __ ] or you do we're gonna put the worst thing that that person's right so those things are promoted and marketed the biggest right you're like how could you vote for such a such person when they're talking about exactly this because that's what you see on the macro level right well on the micro level all those guys he's mad me my [ __ ] car manufacturing plant to be open and then when somebody's wearing make America great again hat you know somebody saw some and throw some miss Iturbi is there like you support that awful [ __ ] and that guys like not just like working a car my dad is very bright though say what ahead is very bright like a [ __ ] would set a bull off alright that [ __ ] is the wildest color red bro I can't even tone it down just a little bit salmon-colored is too much man listen I get it I get it I get it all across the board it was just it's just interesting to see I think it's great you Soto's the the way how funny these senators are they talk all that [ __ ] it's wrestling it's rust it's really wrestling they talk excuse me they talk all this [ __ ] about each other and then they all go eat in the exact same establishments there's this one restaurant I was trying to tell you I forgot the name but I got a holler at my girl Lisa who knows and it used to be way way different right like Newt Gingrich really changed the politics I think I could [ __ ] this up so correct me if I'm wrong it doesn't matter the media yeah yeah she's like it used to be that like senators and House of Reps and reps would all live in DC right because it was a Monday through Friday schedule right so then what Newt did is he took I think Friday's off the schedule so then now you flew to DC stayed in your hotel and then flew back home to wherever you live for the weekend to stay with your family so now your whole family isn't hanging out with these other senators families you're not all going to the same events you're not going to birthday parties either you're doing what normal people who quote unquote work together do and it really fractured politics in a way that now we can't you know just have a discussion about a bill over lunch in the way we used to it just really made like a big divide in other words where there's not as much casual hangout between the right and the left so I think that was like kind of what Gingrich wanted to do but it could have really [ __ ] up diplomacy I mean listen I like the fact that they're all kicking it like that though you say it more I guess what I was but you know I will say I mean I wasn't on I've never been to Capitol Hill before Trump got in office but I keep telling you I was the difference between the Trumper and the regular conservative yes you know what I'm saying so I think it's very hard for people to grasp the concept of being a trump / only because it's such it's such a such a mr. word I'm looking for it's such as something on your morals you know I mean it's heavy on your morals I guess like this just testing your morals like it really makes you wonder what kind of morality do you have when you're seeing him act the way he acts but you still choose to support him right but some people can turn a blind eye when it comes to morality as long as the businesses moment that's what we do with life isn't that what we do with last what everybody does it's literally life that's Hollywood that's why gasoline is so cheap every time we fill up our car and that [ __ ] is only $30 that is turning a blind eye to morality iPhone every time we pick this [ __ ] up wide-eyed of morality like it's every time you buy your wife and engagement ring there's some African kid with a stump arm you bro you don't want that [ __ ] out the ground you don't want to see how the food is cooked Burrell hell no you don't want to see what's going on in that goddamn kitchen no dude that's all it boils down to there's a crazy series on HBO right now have you watched at Chernobyl I want to Chris yeah tasty that's just something she's on the goddamn value menu at Taco Bell it was the biggest new killer a disaster in human history oh good with that and I wouldn't meet the joke yeah but they basically it was one of those things where it you know it's it's it's like dude it's some fucked-up [ __ ] so it happened the Ukraine which is part of the Soviet Union at the time and it was one of the things where the only way to stop this from being a like intercontinental disaster we're talking about like destroy all of Europe incident like Asia I mean [ __ ] up everything waterways soil human millions of people dead etc the only way to really stop it was human sacrifice Jesus so there were people in charge it had to send Russians hundreds of thousands of Russians into the radioactive zones lie to them about what they were gonna get knowing full well they are gonna be dead in weeks or years from the radioactive poisoning because if they didn't do that all of Europe is done and it was like it goes into that that that thing where at first you're looking at you're like wow these guys are pieces of [ __ ] and then you're like well how is that different than war that's exactly I thought about a second think that's exactly what every military does when they feel like they're protecting the best interests of their country to go kill a bunch of [ __ ] they won't think twice about it yeah but it's [ __ ] up man the decisions we got to make as humans and there's also something kind of beautiful about like the bravery of the people that went in because these guys weren't stupid the guys that were going in we're like I know what you're doing just give it to me straight like these miners like just give it to me straight like you're not wearing these gas masks should I wear this [ __ ] gas mask yeah I saw it like I saw Sean King even post another day and he was like I want a president who's not about war or something like that I'm like there's no such thing absolutely positively no such thing on either side I'm like Mariah with the rocks in drones no sustains yeah yeah I want black guys that are actually black you know Shaun King smug Andrew the picture of his brother no I haven't brother looks like he runs a bookstore in Seattle he's the whitest guy I've ever seen in my entire life sean is John is a lie yes whatever he is I don't know I don't know exactly what his race is but I know he's an ally all right so salute to Shaun King I thought that when I started I was like I mean all presidents go to war I have the potential to go to I even if Bernie gets in the white house Bernie may have to go to war Bernie definitely looks like a world war one I need to see Bernie's birth how how old is Bernie really bright they say bernie is 70 down but they gotta be man I'm honey Moses age son his neck gave up telling you man like this every time I see Bernie I cannot help but think about weekend at Bernie's corpse and I like Bernie doctors not so obvious I'm talking because everybody's so old Biden's old yeah I'm off Biden bro yeah mama girl Ashley had the best take monger Ashley says she's not voting for any more old white men she said I'm not voting for any more old white men yeah the shape our future when they're not even gonna be here to see I think you could take older what you think it'd take like white and men out of there and that's still applicable yeah but for any old people just shape our future who aren't gonna be there to see it yeah but I mean I've always led the country say what would have anything other compared to has always been old white men she probably would've made that observation if there had been something of the compare no that is a good point it's like like the of course they don't care about you know the environment so don't be here I'm not gonna hurt that climate change right around the corner what I [ __ ] did I just say climb I've heard that climate change [ __ ] is right around the corner bro what do you mean they be saying that says no I thought I read something other day they was like y'all y'all talking about setting fire they was like ten to fifteen ten fifteen what they be say ten 1500 ten to fifteen some have you know what I say pull up no you see this little plastic straw right hey it feel like the Sun is pulling up every day that's she getting closer and closer and closer Luffy nah I love it I want to smoke now I warn you no I want the smoke no yes I do I want sixty degrees in December in New York yeah but then you got to deal with a hundred plus during the [ __ ] summer yeah we could do that nah that's just Arizona if we get that hot you got a [ __ ] moon and Suns they burned you him right off if it gives that hot little pay some bills you don't want to put tail on the microphone give me the bills right here hobby killer guys other than your absolute best friends who could you ask to bring you red wine at 4:00 p.m. sushi at 9:00 p.m. in a breakfast burrito at 8:00 a.m. I'll tell you who post mates post mates is your personal food delivery grocery delivery whatever you can think of delivery service all year round no more trips to the store you don't even have to know where the story is post mates will deliver anything to you download the app for iOS or Android for free browse your local restaurants and businesses in track your delivery 24 hours a day 365 days a year post mates will bring you whatever you want within the hour anything you're craving post mates can deliver they're the largest on-demand network in the known universe with more than 25,000 partner merchants for a limited time post mates is giving our listeners $100 of free delivery credit for the first 7 days to start your free deliveries download the app right now and use the code idiots that's code idiots for $100 of free delivery credit for your first 7 days when you download the post mates app that's how confident they are you're gonna love this they're just giving you money to spend knowing you're gonna end up spending more just download the app to get anything you need anytime you need it download post mates and save with code idiots Taylor psych I'm sorry Taylor Taylor Taylor why's Charlemagne hates you on a mic why is it why does he hate you [ __ ] you all up first of all you're not gonna chew a bagel on the mic that's Michaela would never yo Michaela why do you yeah why do you guys got this beef yo you don't want any beef yo y'all got beef man every time I see you guys individually you all talking [ __ ] about each other Michaela you were walking down the hallway this way and you were like just talking your cellulite this [ __ ] never lays her edges Michaela why closer to Mike please so we can start this beef what there is no be foamy Kayla has a fun story what happened what happened I got this like temporary Walmart strap phone right now that I'm dealing chopping out the bando with this yeah no I went and I bought it wouldn't nobody care about your phone tell us when you got robbed Oh girls don't tell stories go now you just started the best part of the story where'd you get I went to a pool party I don't even have a voice because I went hard this weekend apparently I didn't realize I was just walking by I had one of those bags that just wrap around your waist yeah and I felt like the pressure on my bag but I thought I was just I thought it wasn't a fanny pack my culture gone I thought I just felt like the pressure on my bag but I thought I was just brushing by somebody but something told me like check your bag yeah and I reached in and got your phone yeah then they called me later on that night from your phone from my phone trying to finesse me out my passcode how they do that they called me claiming to be the lost and found at the Mandalay Bay how they know your number they I they used the lost I put the lost my iPhone thing in and I put my friend's phone number so they called my friend's phone number was just like we need to speak to her to verify that this is her phone because there's a young lady here claiming the phone no they're not good because they told me that the young lady in front of them had already opened the phone and they needed me to verify that it was really her phone and she's like why would you need my passcode for that and then why would you call the number on the lost my iPhone and who calculated all this in them I did because I'm from New York not really that was great okay no I mean like New York or real New York are you getting a little soft you know I wouldn't like it in the first place from your fanny number one why you got a family it was like a toe over the shoulder don't care what it was you'll get robbed not in Vegas I did get robbed that I got it's fine it was the last day to like I maybe oh my god I had just taken some bomb-ass pictures in that damn bikini oh I was about to kill the ground you know who set that robbery up to stunt and she heard about those [ __ ] pics she was like probably the only bikini dance out here okay nobody with my bikini photos and then she ruined your whole [ __ ] what was it what close the bikini it was white Wow makini color white bikini oh you bought it you probably stole it from her like her phone first of all New York is known to pickpocket you set me up she set you up what'd he look like the guy who did it white oh it wasn't white I want us soon I want to assume a black man would never do this to me yo black man is listening right now because you know we got listenership all over the place if you listen in on your new iphone take that fall right to the win right there it win resort they gonna have that [ __ ] hacked in no time done so who steals phones though anymore cuz there's a lot now though like that doesn't make sense to me ATT like I think they turn it off like you can't do anything with it once it's reported stolen by even if you try to unlock it yo I'm kind of tight cuz who could afford a pool party but not a phone first of all who pays for what oh you don't pay for that oh I'm sorry we have Cox life is different all the free [ __ ] that you guys get is because we paid excise that's how world goes around drinks around us you know when you go to the club and make money you guys come up from the club when you go to Vegas do you plan an amount you're gonna spend this is actually a really interesting combo know cuz I didn't plan on spending no you know what I plan on having was money for my ubers and then money for food that's about it parties I can't remember last time I paid for a party I don't think we so so you realize when we go to Vegas we never think about ubers or food that's not calculatedly parties that's the oh I'm like 500 dollars like just for general admission what just to get into it was like Afra Hosting how ugly was he they actually very ugly goes it was a couple it was a couple was a girl and they were they were ugly each other I don't if they came with each other five hundred each no that's absurd what's Club light it was like little baby was performing or something and meek mill can't even get into the [ __ ] casino no he went to to what to Drai's he got um drinks not the casino right the club he went the Cosmo Cosmo is the [ __ ] man you picked the wrong one MGM it's a little bit more old-school old-school Vegas it's big though you like but if you go to Cosmo Cosmo is basically like Manhattan but in Vegas basically because they got all the restaurants what do they have uh what the balcony there's only one with balconies not come on yeah crazy palace has balconies oh that's a balcony in the club hotel room I'll trust myself I'm drunk I'm on drugs and you want a [ __ ] balcony on the 30th floor and drugs I'm a lien on it dude don't I don't want balconies I don't want any of these kind of problems Wade your window I like it when they open the window just like two inches you know and yeah like hotels cuz they know me it's not worth the risk you really think wait you want you want the window just to be wide open so I could fall over why would you I don't trust myself on escalators just sit down and then we'll get caught in this [ __ ] no I'm a mess I don't go I don't go hard often but what I go hard is it's gonna be a problem is mental for from what you mean about it because I know how to talk myself out like from high yeah for instance okay I remember cards I'm mostly smoking all that stuff drink not like that no smoking is different but go I had a edible though yeah that was crazy yeah so I was inside for three days honorable ones exactly so I it was like some years ago I was driving back to New York I was in Philly mm-hmm and I took like a little piece my cousin she put like all different kinds of weed in it yeah so I'm driving I had to pull by four times to get myself out cuz I was by 8 : you were actually driving the vehicle you got this I end up going to I was picking up my boyfriend at the time and I went to the wrong house and you had someone else in the car with you No don't [ __ ] with that at all you're endangering people why you want a microphone sailor oh my god Taylor's out there trying to murder people yo you know Michaela got robbed yeah she told me she deserved it that's what I sing like a [ __ ] this weekend that's what happens when you're walking around a club naked I wasn't naked oh you were naked you were naked I was at the pool in a bathing started to block you when I see cheeks let me tell you something my niece is both of y'all I don't wanna see no cheeks think about who following y'all have as much cheeks as you do y'all need a setting what's that setting we're only your personal friends can do it Oh trust me I did put clothes stories on you didn't see them and don't put me on it I don't want them cheeks for money man what's the worst of it can I so now the story's deleted and now I have what would they steal from you my phone and my cards dignity are you from New York can you get pickpocket that's that's inflation not for New York I am you are clean nice now you got to get that card revoked I don't think a person from Brooklyn somebody pulls up no weapon no money no hip pocket is praise that's right when you from Brooklyn you posed to get got by Nigerian like everybody else me acting like the hotel security with African surprising how'd you know what they sound like LeBron James jr. impression how do you know what were they saying I just know African exit like what was it sound like what we're not gonna do I not say it it's okay we all know why they clearly but it just had a little bit of a little African kick to give you so can you tell me the kick no why not know what to do sell me an umbrella sell me an umbrella right now you're on 27th and Broadway sell me an umbrella it just started to rain so so they start everything with security number now oh you think that your [ __ ] cards got pickpocketing oh you bought to get it now Makayla Wow hey so they stopped everything okay yo y'all want to do some wild [ __ ] somebody commented this on my oh my on one of my pictures talk about what you can and can't do he called me my nila like for vanilla don't you call a [ __ ] ass white boy but I can't say that you would very humbling experience from Aquila I think God saw mckellar this weekend posing half-naked in our exact searches during Ramadan fasting out there and then I think that God humbled her God said you know what I'm gonna take all that away numbers yep if anyone has a new phone that they'd like to donate to my cause that's not this $40 Walmart card so you was showing cheeks all weekend you ain't got no money Charlamagne you know what she said you know she said she said that she's like when I was playing my Vegas trip I just thought about money for ubers and food that's it you was in Vegas you didn't know Oh bro it was and you came back empty-handed showing all my [ __ ] god I noticed I noticed in every other video is you with a bunch of girls that's the problem y'all girls be [ __ ] for free girls [ __ ] each other for free and oh I don't know but I'm just saying hey oh hey lesbian I love people let me smell your breath [Music] you love people yes stop loving people oh because yes one of those ways leaves you broke okay the other ones a little change in your pocket now ain't saying you should trick I'm just saying you got to use it you got to get what you want it's a good point I think Abraham Lincoln said listen have you wait do you like you like nillas by the way I'm not encouraging Mikayla to trick I'm not encouraging you to trick I'm not encouraging you to trick I'm just saying don't be showing the cheeks for free mmm-hmm don't show the cheeks for free but it's alright yo if the cheeks it's the cheek listen can we go back to you being a lesbian it take about it real quick is it it takes you a lot to shake you cheeks like I saw you on your videos and you know it does take her a lot it's like you don't you revving the long haul but it won't compete no tell my stories are gone now I saw one for show and the only reason I watch because I don't know what the [ __ ] she was doing like she was leaned over and it was like she would go starter here at the top but didn't [Laughter] lesbians girls girls I did walk into this yeah like a girl looks like me I don't know I just need a phone did you turn on your cards and already I did I turn everything off so I'm good on it this is [ __ ] up the first thing stuff you should be ashamed in himself yeah that's true why would you see somebody's RushCard [Laughter] alright by knowing all these cheeks all the [ __ ] time one time for the baby so let's yeah what's your take on this like tell me I'd listen I'd like to be first of all I like the baby because the baby represents the Carolinas North Carolina specific okay the reason I have a different respect is a admiration for the babies because I understand how hard it is to make it as a rapper from the Carolinas especially a sweet rapper right you know I'm saying when you think of North Carolina like you had Petey Pablo who's discrete [ __ ] for real right but then you think about other than that it's like little brother you know Jake whole course rhapsody salute to rhapsody they're all very very very dope MC but me coming from South Carolina and you know being in Charlotte being in Raleigh dudes like the baby dudes like his crew you know the billion-dollar baby entertainment stunner for Vegas you know rich dunk those the type of [ __ ] I came up around right in South Carolina so I respect what the baby's doing and you know when the baby first came on the scene I was not really I was checking for him cuz he was from the Carolinas but I was like you know I hope this dude is more than just antics right but you know he was wearing the diaper on stage and stuff like that then you started hearing about him you know killing somebody in a Walmart parking lot so when they first asked him to come on The Breakfast Club I'm like nah but I got to make sure he's you know red from the Carolina the right way and he's not just some dude out here getting off for the wrong reasons I did my man chopped he was like no bro like this dude is working his music is right and when I heard the project the project you put out it was April maybe March April or May February I remember March April right it was the [ __ ] it's Abby put out when I got sugar on then I was like yo let's do the dope right you know saying and it's like you put them on brothers club cuz interview did like three million views and I like seeing him work you know hmm so when you ask me what do I think about this situation I think that the baby needs to move out of Charlotte and the reason I think he needs to move out of Charlotte because it's very hard being the only one of something anywhere so when you're the only big fish small pond there you go and I love Charlotte Charlotte is a beautiful city but you know right now you got a lot of people that are hating on the baby success you got a lot of people that may have hated him from when he was in the street doing whatever he was doing now they hate him even more now because he's a rapper and I think that that can come with a lot of problems and it can come with a lot of different people trying to try you and I don't think that makes you a sucker because you decided you know what i'ma relocate you know I'm saying or maybe just go live on the outskirts this right Charlotte somewhere and like let them see you every now and then if they see you at all but I don't think it comes a point in time when you got to protect your own interests right because it is very like I said it's very hard being the only one of something anywhere what was your take on the whole interaction that transpired this week I think that make the the guy who did that absolutely deserved it so can you break down I'm watching this from the periphery okay and I found it wildly entertaining but there's part of me that goes okay this guy's gonna blow up now because people look this is like it's not happening not happening wait what do you mean he's not blowing up I'm saying to baby not the guy who got knocked down Oh baby popped in Rhino buddy this is like an amazing like thug tale that you get to see the baby or somebody short but was there video yes and Walmart parking lot these charges just got dropped in March Wow okay fair in self-defense no but it was the same type of situations what I'm saying same type of situation somebody trying you right because you're the baby ain't nothing I'm saying so what happened with this the guy pulls up on him in a back story I went on a rap I went down a [ __ ] rabbit hole this [ __ ] this weekend cuz it was Memorial weekend and I was just living my life like it's golden sitting in my goddamn pergola in the backyard making s'mores with the kids and in-between reading books I was just [ __ ] I just I thought this [ __ ] was so hilarious right the psyche of human beings is so interesting so this guy right yes oh my bad take it away yeah it was taking them away okay it's because it's over I did the two seconds of fame is over okay because now your fame is just infamy but the guy has been harassing the baby for years I'm not talking about like a couple weeks think about the one press it's gotta be one person on social media that is constantly giving you the business like one person you probably know their twitter name by heart you Instagram by heart cuz they always got something negative to say about you he is this guy and I'm talking about he's threatened violence on the baby he know called him a sucker told him you not represent a city right I mean just every little thing it's really needless criticism and that's why you gotta be very careful of needless criticism because jealousy and envy destroys from within and a lot of times when that jealousy and envy is eating you alive you just stop being Petty and you just start saying needless [ __ ] about a person like [ __ ] that don't even matter like well you see him eating a bowl of Froot Loops man what type of [ __ ] [ __ ] Cinnamon Toast Crunch right sometimes we just be dumb [ __ ] and that's what he has constantly done to the baby so from what we saw in this video baby his partner her was his brother was in the Louis Vuitton store in South Park Mall right and dude came in there with the camera now I don't know what happened before all of that I just know from the video we saw dude was on his camera had it in selfie mode saying look at this [ __ ] - baby now I'm gonna tell you what that comes from ok that comes from you taunting this man for the past couple years on social media now you finally run into him so you still performing that's a performance huh let me turn my phone on and show everybody about this [ __ ] ass [ __ ] I've been talking about the past couple years I ain't scared it is [ __ ] Yatta Yatta Yatta him and the baby get into an altercation the guy said he was in that a bio belt to me that's the most important lesson that should be taken from this whole situation and belts are important seriously this man was trying to fight the baby while holding his pants up and holding a smartphone in his hand so answer so right before he swings his punch he pulls his pants up one one last time and swings yeah and then from what we know that was all she wrote because the next thing we saw was this man laid out on the ground bloody with his pants around his ankles yeah I don't feel sorry for him in any way shape or form because when you campaign for something and you can't pay hard enough yeah sometimes you win he won he got what he was looking for and if you was looking for clout all you young kids man y'all better start understanding what this word cloud means like we know cloud means power and influence but cloud also means they get hit upside the head with something hard right it could be a hand could be a [ __ ] a break it could be a bat either way you getting hit so a lot of y'all [ __ ] be cloud chasing and that's the clout you're receiving right that [ __ ] hard fist to the goddamn dome right and that's what this dude got so I think he deserved it because I think all this trolling [ __ ] you know for fame and this trolling [ __ ] for attention I think this [ __ ] is lame is [ __ ] I think it's wack I think it's out of control and I think that we got to stop rewarding it and the sad part about it is even a guy like that he thinks he's still winning cuz he gets followers why do y'all follow these people you can laugh at them without being on their page right I went this page a million times this weekend I went to his page I would I would this story I go to his [ __ ] Instagram videos they give me a good laugh yeah I don't gotta follow him why would I follow him yeah you know I mean and then the dude is like yeah I got 50,000 do follows and I got me a Lambo truck but what does that mean yeah now you're just a guy that the baby and his people beat up in the store driving a Lambo truck so what I just don't want that to be that young man's legacy would you is that what you would want to be known for no but a guest famous addictive in that way it's not a shame no we got it we gotta find another word for famous when you're being attention famous when you're being celebrated yeah because you actually have a skill because you have a talent attention is addictive attention is the day you go yeah and that's what you need to realize attention is not fame fame fame real fame usually translates into some dollars yeah attention does not yeah like you just grumpy did you know grumpy cat died just yeah yeah making money though grumpy cat was Papa I am spectacular from Pretty Ricky a lot of money wait what Mayan spectacular is the person who gave us grumpy cat one of the guys from Pretty Ricky I am spectacular is so big in the tech world spectac is so huge in the tech world like suspect a kid like multi-millionaire I don't know even which one that is the light-skinned what would you dread still don't know hey man it's all good yeah just don't profile alright I won't yeah but it's all good but Trump I'm saying all that to say it's just a tension and that [ __ ] yeah attention really does kill and a lot of [ __ ] getting killed because of that [ __ ] yeah I just I don't I don't feel sorry for the dude in no way shape or form I pray for him I don't think he realize he's traumatized yeah no he's really traumatized yeah yeah there's a traumatic experience like you get beat up number one being getting beat up is traumatic right but then you get beat up for the whole world to see yeah and you in and you know you're making hundreds of videos talking about how unbothered you are and it is the fragile male ego but you also get rewarded for it in a weird way because you get all these new followers right so there's this weird system that's happening which is like oh maybe I should continue these antics because they are quote unquote working now they're not working or watching a car wreck they keep getting beat up right but sometimes people do that I mean look at jackass right this borock yeah dude just roll wrappers and have them beat you up I mean somebody's gonna die I don't know if you want that don't even call it blackout though we can just call it jacket that could be the new jackass 100 because that is the new way right these [ __ ] that are willing to risk their lives for attention now you just take these people that are willing to go do anything to anybody regardless of the consequences you see these kids in those two Russian kids in Brooklyn they like go up to people and they like what it might do looks you know yeah oh no they don't do that no more now that's it was from years ago yeah but they were just getting knocked out on camera they were getting punched in the face on camera and putting everything for attention man assign him to you did yeah man these networks couldn't see the vision they had it but they still got it then I see them was fire like checking people pulling their pants down to see if their guns and stuff now they've roll up like and they like what would they do they've rolled up and they're like step on someone's sneakers they're crazy these kids cuz we get murdered no day was wide with clue I think due name was Cody Cody had this show that was like to catch a predator right but he would he would while on the kids so he would go get the kids parents can't be like yo your daughter or our son is about to go meet up with this old man whatever whatever are they had the old man come to the house and the parents would pop up on the kids - it was those kids would those kids were like really really really genius at what they would what are they doing now I don't know ain't talked to didn't see in a minute man it was Dennis see Cody and I forget the other ones name you can I thinking crazy how do you with dope but they stop doing that though because it got too dangerous I crazy it was smart dudes pulled out guns after it was smart like [ __ ] that I'm not going to [ __ ] I'm not risking my life for this dumb [ __ ] yeah but you're smart you get in you get out but I guess they made some money I don't know I'm not sure they did or not I didn't see them know I love them you know they did a phenomenal it's what people it's what people do it's a wild it's a wild situation what do you think of that whole Meek Mill thing that happened in Vegas I still don't know I don't either they just wouldn't let him into the Cosmo I'm just tired to see him I'm just tired of seeing a rich black people you could I go you celebrated now we had tolerated right like right like Atlantic City cost $10 go buy a [ __ ] casino meek like a sighs oh [ __ ] go see what the opportunities on legislation is out there buy a [ __ ] casino and make that [ __ ] the new hot [ __ ] yeah I think about it they've been try to make a landing City the East Coast Vegas for a long time yeah we could get that shot why isn't it why can't a see work mr. president yeah yo but that low-key scheme in the world is Vegas right because Vegas makes you think it's all young kids [ __ ] partying it's 90% old people that are fat and on those scooters eating out of buffets and gambling their life away so maybe AC just needs like a revamp with the marketing they've been trying to make it they've been trying to shift the Hamptons to AC and like appeal to the Hamptons crowd and just take that overflow right I think it's the presidentís city as a city you know whether some one block off the boardwalk yes it's the sky look like heroin the sky's the colour heroin if you [ __ ] are in Casino and somebody that shouldn't being is gonna walk in like some sketchy as bum off the street you know I'm saying like hey then random only have a soul food is there separation between the rest of the city and the strip a little bit of these room yeah just walk in a casino right like in Vegas yeah yeah Atlantic City it's right there Atlanta's right no it literally is right so they need to separate a little more needs to feel like its own place its own unit and I've given in Lane City a couple tries when rebel was open yeah I want to [ __ ] around there rebel and just like I said you sitting there trying to play the [ __ ] slot machine and then it's the guys standing next to a Starbucks cup shake shake and change you think he's just waiting to play until you smell something that's smell you know and then you got to give him some change the [ __ ] is going on it don't feel exclusive ya don't feel like it's some flash it basically a shame because it's literally right there in the water like in the summer you could go swim in the oceans now think now water is not popping no no no I was not yeah Atlantic City water is not popping absolutely not hell no no could be if you go to Margate which is the next town over it's really nice no it's got to be right there like it's capable for the water to be nice thing imagine that pool party like that pool party would be way better you have a DJ right there in the ocean everybody's in real saying order for the water to be blue the sky I gotta be blue the sky in Atlantic City is the color of your sweatshirt I'm serious that's your does the President Roh like ah man and it could be it could be fly yeah maybe I don't know maybe in the summer if you kept it just to the resorts yes I'm saying I got the pools and [ __ ] have you kept it just to like the hotels and you did [ __ ] there it's just one hotel I stayed in recently that was mad dope it was the name of that [ __ ] my daughter had a cheerleading competition out there I don't think it was seasoned it's something new I don't know fine I thought was cool all I'm saying is meek mica get that [ __ ] property if you know you gotta jump through so many hoops yo is it possible it's the rep of Jersey yeah and I hate to say it Philly a little bit yeah it's like city there's a whole lot it more filly to manage city injury yeah your kit needs to be come to you know if it was part of New York if Atlantic City was in you haven't you could take the worst part alone I'll like the worst part along on but the fact it was in New York it would add bigoted people are prejudice they like he or something then they attach it to it so they're like oh that's the resort by Philly in Jersey New York Yonkers right Empire that's just trash huh yeah I mean it's something about Vegas Vegas is a spice about the west coast what's closes sexy makes a big dad and I'm saying way yeah you you you you rolling dice with somebody next to you in a hoodie like a dice game well no man is different different vibe they got on suits and [ __ ] you know me like the second sex it's just sexy in Vegas that's all it boils down to what do you what do you think about like residency's in Vegas I think it's dope easy money would you ever do a residency in Vegas Lea if I had something that could be residency work yeah like let's say you had at one point in your life you had like a one-man show or something like that or absolutely think it's easy money bro you would stand for how long cuz some of these people say that for a year straight or year I mean depending on me for 3-4 month whatever they get paid yeah no that's great like paid like T I got a residency in Vegas oh yeah he does one where he's in and out right now but it's like this crazy money I'm talking about like the you know they're people who do one show a day seven days a week Britney does it's like every day oh that's a job what else is Britney gonna do at this point in life [ __ ] that's it I'm just like what else is Britney gonna do like yo so it's basically touring without touring easily come to you instead of you going less stress you know saying you got a family you can have your family right there you're gonna work be back now yeah thank know and nobody gives a [ __ ] is not like they waiting for you to go out and do crazy mad dance routines and [ __ ] like see you oh yeah I would we do one I think that's it is a great League for comedians yeah I think it's a little it's a little different because I think the people that end up seeing music acts mmm have seen the music act several times in their life they don't mind going to see it again you know like Janet Jackson was performing there was the video of beyoncé and Kelly did you see that watch it was though it was dope but at the same time it's like beyoncé and Kelly I've seen Janet probably a hundred times in their life but you're right and it makes you feel nostalgic again yes but it also takes the level of expectation down four or five notches per second whew Janet Jackson you say you want tall I still want you to dance like you in the 80s right I realized you got the [ __ ] Bernie Sanders back do you know what I mean so it's just like yo go out there do this rather than see I'm not really I'm not really expecting much right this is cool I won't be doing most of the dancing anyway right like I think that [ __ ] is dope I [ __ ] with the residency's personally yeah no it's just it's an interesting way of I guess entertaining I saw that video man it was kind of depressing it was like beyoncé and Kelly were the only ones up dance and everybody else is like old and sitting down do you think that's back-breaking for you as an artist like I mean you think Janet is like affected by it or performing to her is like so second nature now that she just goes through the motion and I do who's probably never doing the biggest residency Beyonce you don't know that you creepy I think eating I think he's got 30 million dollars from early Hoover investment all right do you know how much money Beyonce would make if she did it he got another pair suppose they give her a cut of the casino they would have to and by the way if she was doing it it was something that she'd be doing just because she wants to write you know I'm saying that seems that came with a grandfather offer you're gonna get 10% in this nah too low for B maybe every point 5 or what is the point if you get a piece now they'd give about temples they give them all suppose there's one that we don't know Beyonce broke on rocky ground we can't really see it and they see this as a way to elevate immediately become the time I get what half bro that's not worth 10 no it might give a half bro no no you're worth we're not talking you're talking about what the casino brings him while she's performing right because that's the whole idea with entertainment you bring people up break you're bringing more people to this casino Beyonce's gonna [ __ ] whatever the casino do not be on --then go quadruple keys how and dude what size you could be on my fulfill for residency just think about that do you think she could just do every only been one time Atlantic City has been popping do y'all remember when I was now when rebel Hotel and Casino bought Beyonce for like two nights at three nights and some [ __ ] like that and it was insane yes that's I think that was the grand opening it make sure I'm not lying you do a small venue but the tickets for ten grand minimum they started a lot of people googled you know what I would do thank you big venue and I'd see how many nights a residency could go for in Vegas cuz think about it exclusive here's your thing this is and I realized this should happen to me on tour so there's gonna be a million fold for something like Beyonce if you go to a poppin city sometimes your fans supporters will use as an excuse to take a weekend away and when I did Amsterdam there were all these people that came globally to come see me perform they're everywhere from like South Africa Saudi Arabia all these different places so I'm like okay Beyonce's in Vegas right now all your girls are gonna go you know Beyonce's in Vegas well we do a girls weekend but it's like they're Superbowl true right let's make a weekend out of it so so when Beyonce performs she's really given that casino three days worth of revenue that's why I'm saying giving her a piece of equity might make sense financially it was four nights four night that's the only time I remember remember when I wouldn't be on what if it was like a month of Beyonce and it was a 30 day residency in Vegas oh and do you do it in the arena that Floyd fights at that MGM you got to do it somewhere big old mg arena was in the mg I'm not the one that's off-site but the one that we saw fights like the Canelo fight that kind of a sellout a whole Wolford to MGM I think she could sell out a month people are just gonna come from all over the world hmm and it's 30 days straight what kind of money thinks she could make dude this would be nuts 30 days straight she don't gotta go anywhere she don't gotta move never eBay fine to Vegas yeah you make all your Tour money I think we underestimate how how he'll be on check this check this she actually saves money cuz when you're on tour you got to fly your entire tour staff drive your entire production team all those trucks with all your [ __ ] to every other venue if you still got to pay for them for the mind though say what you still gotta pay for them yeah but there's no travel right there's no taking your set there's no all those truck drivers taking it there's no any like it's gonna cost you a fraction of what it'll cost a total tour worldwide you get to do it right there and Dennis I think she could do a month straight oh here we are putting together Beyonce's plan at 60 65 all right we're putting together Beyonce's plan for the 65 why one man I'm Beyonce yo when you're in Vegas you know who's a hop skip and a jump away you know how many pop and ass acts are just gonna pop up for guest spots yeah the other makes a lot of money still on Tauber oh I know but it's more that makes more than Beyonce you crazy it is about to be a billionaire of just touring Google you see off of like owning what is it called like the product and sure about to make a billion dollars all you bout to be a busy they say he'll be a billionaire by the age of 30 of touring I don't I can't believe that Google and I've paid to see Ed Sheeran sitting on the fifth row Google Ed Sheeran top pollsters 2018 year in global touring chart with a record four hundred thirty two million crows all 4.8 million tickets sold weird to think about him but to be a billionaire guys this is a gross amount of money you're making you're not making no she's not a billionaire although with the type of Ed Sheeran billionaire this just came out does it make you bigger grosses and make you beta type in ed Sheeran billionaire heads the higher notes have an issue your billionaire Christie keep typing in got no [ __ ] no egg illusion something I don't like Jesus all right let me see yes ed sheeran said to become a billionaire before he turns 30 um you got a click on it Chris guys know the difference between a million and a billion is so hot like people don't even realize the money I don't deny that but I'd imagine a lot of it comes from owning what is it called the product it's all to publishing I mean that - yeah yeah but it's but it's mostly alternate Ed's on the road for all the time like Ed still on the road right now he's a great off the [ __ ] shaper you shape yeah okay it is apparently Wellings way to becoming a billionaire he's only 28 the news we're not coming to surprise the avid fan the English singer-songwriter broke a record for ticket sales last year selling nearly 5 million during his world tour to collect more than forty thirty two million over the course of 12 months that's about 90 million more than his power Taylor Swiffer in that year uh get to the [ __ ] man uh yes Jesus Christ Sharon is expecting to earn listen Sharon is expecting to earn more than a hundred and ten million dollars over the next three months of his popular divide tour which started in March of 2017 and ends in August of 2019 it means he'd be pulling in a total of more than 500 million for that tour alone that's Prost right what does he make of that we don't know bro now I will say this and Sharon got no cent it's just him okay sorry he's that talent you don't gotta pay I know it's unbelievable a DAB and he has no it's just he can create everything himself so he's getting all that money man and he lives a very Vic it'll be like Jeff Bezos wife and just be like look man take half of this [ __ ] for me yo so I don't need all of this [ __ ] she had to do that taxes not even taxes why you get 36 billion dollars we're gonna call you the greatest gold digger in the history of gold diggers so you've got to give 18 billion away so that we could be she's a good person you're not a good person you did jack [ __ ] to get that money the company what'd you do Brian breakfast bro here's some coffee you've been up all night working okay to be a genius she's a wife bro for real you think about all the times you've been working on the joke late at night 2:00 in the morning and you can't quite get it you call some woman over she gives you some head you buzz off and you like got it you know I'm saying yes she deserves hundred dollars ain't no 36 billion son you should have had a prenup if you wanted a best business man in the history of life Jeff Bezos should have a that's like you start all these business away baby start a business together like this you just say that because you're married it's not because you really think she got help the business if she could help the news by herself she would let's let's keep on it what the [ __ ] does Jeff do now she's a talented 60 billion man ooh there's only one boom okay listen listen when I say that there's no wife worth 16 billion is because they aren't they haven't made that by themselves yet that's the hope oh my god guys oh you mean are there there's no women multi-billionaires exist and if they do exist they got in a divorce they don't make that money by themselves jebel Elena and she's the greatest woman in history there's several Nigerian women who are billionaires how they get that oil money exactly husband like it's like it's like being born in Nigeria is like being a [ __ ] reality show style money like come on bro well I'm saying is nobody no wife is worth thirty six billion dollars down sixteen in one Taylor Oh meg Whitman I believe she's the CEO Fitness sexism in massage well kind of true ten women billionaires I'm looking at right yeah but sixteen who's a double-digit woman billion strong men they don't want to be billionaires billion dollars pissed off at 15 billion oh yeah yeah hold up hold up this information I like it no no no I'm ready for all this I'm ready for all the smoke you ready for look at look of all these people hey Shawn I mean look up all these people yeah every one of those people look see how they got that money I mean Laurie look out Louie Oh got her money I dare you I double dare you I don't know what this means but it says she's a French billionaire Harris heiress handed down from like your man Trump oh he's right the only daughter-in-law the hair is of length no this is a woman LaLanne bell it better yeah better quartz you got the money for her mom and then when her mom got it said our family owned the company L'Oreal where their mom got it where the mom got it just look it up typing who's Alice why are you doing this I'll tell you right now they don't exist they don't exist don't still googling you think Google have it first search your 15 pages deep in Google no no I'm not the Loreal the L'Oreal woman no [ __ ] she got the money from her mom oh your mom's dance studio didn't work out [Music] oh that's adorable my mom's a millionaire so see you rested wisely no she bought she busted her ass investors wisely yeah my mom was a teacher too she taught the Assessors she's a millionaire your mom's a teacher understand if we don't really come with the smoke now my mom's not a billionaire but you just you're kind of you kind of just women can't make money what you do you were in a narrative my mom okay worked her ass off or the business bought real estate real estate worth millions of dollars okay right how much is a difference a billion a million one hundred times thousand right you don't even know like that's crazy people don't even understand a billion is insane when we talk about a billion it's insane real quick yeah talk Chris click some more it's fifteen people yang who you on Yahoo Yan is Chinese the Chinese property developer and the majority shareholder of country garden holdings a stake largely transferred to her jeff bezos she gave half of the way y'all don't want the money somebody else it the only way women amass real wealth is that divorce is the great you sound mad crazy right now like there's not a lot of women you're talking about my mother my mother is wealthy because of me of what's it called of war hard work okay wealth and then real money so lose it my mom still got a rent out her places so she can live I'm taking over his couple of billion dollars bro that's wealth to me so what I say the first person I said was okay and this is how averse to being a wife Oprah's you won't even marry stemming I'm gonna be honest with you you know why cuz half that money could be gone 20 minutes later go no Chris gotta go question I mean it's just it's moving the gold folks but it's still a good question Wow how many self-made male billionaires are there what you mean like how many of those guys actually became billionaires because of their own mer like they're the first ones in their bloodlines not a lot the exact same amount of feed you just reach it so huggabug definitely but it did he yeah it's not even real money whatever I don't buy that texture tech money is evaluated twenty to one right so it's like if you have a business it's worth 1 million dollars it's a 20 million dollar valuation on the market right so if if if a tech if Mark Zuckerberg is worth let's say 20 billion dollars because of the evaluation of his company he's really only worth 1 billion cash so it's not real money that's why I don't buy up all his what we're talking about we're talking about people like Oprah's billions of billions like this she got holding she got real estate it's not all up in the market Robert I the next day his money's real right like I read about it another black billionaire yesterday Dave Stewart yeah Dave Stewart he's a things are really my point is it's not that women can't be wealthy it's not the women can't be wealthy but we're talking about billionaire wealth is a different thing and absolutely in order to get that wealth it has to be handed down from generation to generation right for the most part yes let me ask ya are you saying they're not capable or it's not in their nature to go after money on that level neither then why are there so few women billionaires what I'm saying is the greatest wealth builder for women in history is divorce that's a societal construct right but what I'm saying is men don't get that right it's like nobody men don't build wealth through divorce you they lose it through inheritance right but women can inherit - right there's a rule that says women can't hear it so right oh there's all these women that have also inherited then that turned into a billion dollar company right IV inherited a million dollar business and then made it and much bigger I would also let me see that's a great point I was bout to say that I would like to see how many of these companies did women take further I'm sure they did I'm sure like some of these money got transferred to them and took they took the companies into the new millennium and we all t billions women are not like money-grubbing greedy pieces of [ __ ] like menarche men were piece of [ __ ] so when a woman gets thirty six billion dollars she gives half of it to charity yes right to [ __ ] pets or whatever like that when man gets thirty six billion dollars she's going how do I make it a hundred billion like so when I'm you guys are positioning me like I'm some like misogynist [ __ ] Oh Andrew we've never had to do that with you buddy all right you do a great job of that on your own it's actually one of your great tres I don't know how you do it it's actually amazing these shots you get off sometime this guy shoots from anywhere and when women don't have that like incredible greed in them except during a divorce what is you're analyzing the word is generalize and just brutalize and all the way caress you do master me to your master communications major journalizing is the right you are journalizing we were journalizing yeah you definitely said journalize you absolutely said journalizing yeah now you're saying it right that was a Fillion juice you like John realizing I'm Donna lysing get a divorce that's how you only men are stupid up to marry poor people women would never do that women are intelligent you go after someone who's got way more than you so there's an upside we go go oh you're hot and broke okay I'll marry you we're [ __ ] retards listen I got the same energy for men we're retards right we see a hot girl who's worth zero who's actually got debt we see a hot girl with $200,000 debt but she's got nice tits oh really she's married you know Jeff Bezos should be getting all the smoke cuz he didn't have a prenup because he don't believe in himself wouldn't he any work yoni started all right now you know let me tell you something the greatest stories in American history was a writer and then he quit and they moved across the country to start Amazon together this is absurd if they really started Amazon together she would actually get half of what it's worth she knows that they didn't so she's not getting half like you did 100 million 100 billion or something she liked that she got she got like a third but I thought she got half of what do you got what are you know I think the company's worth a hundred billion dollars she got half of what he was not ever he was she got had let's look it up I think she got less it's not worth it do we do all the bills already there should be a limit for what a woman can get in divorce they should cap out like a like a salary you say that didn't girls gonna stop giving you limits on how many dick sucks you get a week they do it's not like you get married girls go Morgan I guarantee you get happier [ __ ] do we pay all the bills well we got one day y'all gonna insert cuz we already read it cuz I got I got it I gotta go do something hey I think we gave him a fire in 90 minutes what's he gotta do guys divorce yeah I got a prenup I'm never making that mistake [Music] I've been on my woman for 21 years I would not be the man I am today without her so she deserves she deserved more than half to be honest with you so just the truth like take it take it doing what you know you you're wealthy man I'm doing pretty okay you're wealthy right now where I'm going but I'm going pretty pretty oh you're wealthy man and you're saying this at your level of wealth right now all right mmm but let's say you get to like the hundreds of millions level if if it's real hundreds of millions like that's actually my liquid not net worth [ __ ] yeah like I got a hundred million M's which I will sitting in a bank and I get a divorce yes take 50 you better than me take 50 see you gonna be good with three what can you get with 50 good for me I'm just loving me it's like me and my wife been together I got she deserved that like she's held me down when there was nothing to be held 10 million 10 million slave I mean it's not like what I'm saying like if you got a hundred MS and I got three daughters here take it we're gonna still take care of the daughters not really necessarily what you're gonna still take care of your daughter since how old they are and would be making themselves in life that no time for slackers buddy babes all on you choose your own adventure babe this life I tell my kids that all the time life is a choose your own adventure book so you can make things hard you can make things easy for you so now if your wife is worth half right because and hopefully let me ask you this okay your wife is worth half because what she is provided to you yes right your kids have provided you work ethic and inspiration to go out here and get it are they not worth some of it hopefully my daughter's take it farther than I ever took it in my life and because of the great example that me and their mothers set for them they were able to forge their own path and they have made their own money what if what if your wife cheats on you oh she ain't getting [ __ ] off you just off your petty person will be in the courtroom but he reconcilable difference in reconcilable difference is she sucked another person's dick so her and a [ __ ] can suffer all right if you're in the court for erectile difference that's right no total ballgame and that's just me being petty now what happens is oftentimes in divorce right you don't have the same energy that you have turn a loving flourishing marriage and you start to be upset and start to resent each other you're Petty and you get petty so you could see how in that moment I don't think anybody deserves anything for cheating no bruh I'm B I'm being honest cuz you are the one who got married you're the one who said into death do you part you're the one who took that bat it's like a contract it is just say I'm not gonna cheat yeah you went out there and violated the terms of the contract I don't think you why you are willing to give her I mean a long time ago I'm guilty of talking about my wife yes you are delivered I love you listen to this podcast you think we're smart you think we're intelligent you think we're brilliant yeah absolutely right if you look to this podcast and you think with just a couple idiots who don't know [ __ ] you're right - is the brilliance podcast thank you for listening

Channel: The Andrew Schulz

Views: 154,344

Keywords: andrew schulz, andrew schultz, comedy, comedian, stand up, brilliant idiots, flagrant 2, podcast, sports, entertainment, pop culture, commentary, comedy club, near me, jokes, charlamagne, charlemange, breakfast club, interviews

Id: Yf3JsLHIxCM

Length: 95min 18sec (5718 seconds)

Published: Fri May 31 2019