DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): Today on "America's Supernanny." [child screaming] I meet a family with a
disruptive child at its center. Stop.
Stop. Stop. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Eight-year-old Garrett has Down syndrome. [child screaming] His behavior
dominates family life. [child screaming] Leaving his three siblings
feeling alone and ignored. I feel like people
at school care more about me than
people at home. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Pastor dad tends to his flock at church. His Son, Jesus Christ. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
But leaves mom on her own to look after the family. I'm going to go upstairs,
get a little work done. [music playing] DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): So I'm here. With a master's degree
in special education-- What does that say? DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
I'll offer this family the support they need. You are exactly the
right woman for this job. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
But I'll pull no punches-- But that's not
what it's about. It's not about you. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
--to bring peace back into their lives. We're going to keep trying
until we get it right. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
My name is Deborah Tillman. I'm a wife, a mother,
and my child care centers are amongst the
best in the country. Go. DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): I've dealt with every kind of kid. DEBORAH TILLMAN: What
in the world was that? DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
And every kind of family. They don't have the
problem, you have the problem. The dog pees and
poops over there? [child screaming] This is just a madhouse. DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): Some people call me a miracle worker. I'm so glad you're here. DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): But you can call me
America's Supernanny. This week, I'm in
San Jose, California to meet the Fitzgerald family. [child screaming] Stop playing or you
can go to your room. DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): There's Jenny, a frazzled stay-at-home mom. Andy, a hardworking pastor. 10-year-old Jake,
who feels ignored. Nine-year-old Dawson who
has a negative attitude. Blue or purple? No. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Eight-year-old Garrett, who's stubborn and willful. I don't want any. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
And three-year-old Carly, who whines for attention. Mom never set
boundaries, and now she has four rambunctious kids
going in every direction. Move. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Garrett has Down syndrome with his own
set of special needs, and he's a runner. JENNY: I got him. Garrett, stop. Garrett runs out of the
house as many times a day as you forget to lock the door. Do you leave without mommy? Yes. No, you do not. I mean, we just
feel completely-- Exhausted. Overwhelmed. JENNY: I feel at a loss when it
comes to disciplining Garrett because it's hard to lift
him up to give him a timeout. He's 80 pounds. I find myself just resigned. I just think, why do I keep
trying to do this when I know it's not making a difference? DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): So mom's run ragged all over the place,
just tired and hopeless. And dad, where is he? He's conveniently
missing from the drama. I'm a pastor of a new church. And His Son, Jesus Christ. And I'm gone for
most of the day. No kicking. In a matter of
minutes after I leave, the whole house can be
ransacked and destroyed. I feel like such
a failure as a mom. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
I've got to get in there and order this chaos. I need help. I really need help. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Before somebody gets hurt. JENNY: Garrett. [music playing] Hi. Hi. How are you? When I first saw Deborah, I
wanted to scream and tell her that she was like
a dream come true. I'm Jenny. - Hi, Jenny.
- Hi, Ms. Deborah. I'm Andy. Andy, nice to meet you. Jake. Jake. And Dawson. Dawson. Who's this? Carly. Carly. Hi, Carly. Thank you for introducing Carly. And your name is? Garrett. Hi, Garrett. [inaudible] Thank you so much. Well, I am here to
observe you today, so I want you to do
exactly what you normally do so I can see it. DEBORAH TILLMAN: No
sooner than I arrived, dad had to leave to
go to work, and that left mom and the
children, because she's a stay-at-home mom. I would like you to
pick up that cereal bowl. Jake, you pick up
that cereal bowl. DEBORAH TILLMAN: Mom
asked the two older boys to clean up the living room. No, that's not mine because
I didn't have those Cheerios. OK. They just gave
her a hard time. They were grumbling, mumbling,
and it never got done. Jake, who put all
these on the floor? Garrett. Garrett did all this? And you pick it up all the
time when Garrett does it? Yup.
It's tiring. - Oh.
- Stupid. It's stupid. Mom never really
addressed the boys not completing what
she asked them to do. If mom isn't following
through with chores, I'm wondering what else she's
not following through with. [doorbell ring] Who could it be, Carly? DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Here's little Dawson, knocking on the front door to
tell mom that Garrett's run out the back. Did he go somewhere? No. Oh my god, my heart
went in my throat. Hey, Garrett? He just got out. OK, is he back there? That was an absolutely
terrifying moment for me. Is he there? No. OK. He just got out. Don't worry. Oh, there he is. Oh. Do we go out front without
mommy's permission? No. OK, inside please. DEBORAH TILLMAN: There was no
emotional response from mom. She was actually
numb, like just blank. Garrett takes up a
lot of mom's energy. I get that. But it means that
the other kids aren't getting a lot of her attention. What are you doing, Jake? I just like building things. DEBORAH TILLMAN: Mm-hmm. But it usually
never works out. So you like building things? What else do you like to do? What do you do with your dad? What kinds of things
do you do with dad? Uh. I don't know. OK, red flag number one. Jake is clearly missing
something in his life. I wonder how his brother
Dawson is feeling. Tell me something, Dawson, you
know that I'm a middle child, too. The older sister got everything,
and then the younger one got all the attention, and
then I felt kind of like left out a little bit. Is that kind of how you feel? Not left out, but I
don't feel congratulated. I started thinking there's
more to this than just him being the middle child. It's just that my
mom never said, wow, you did a very good job. I'm impressed. Yeah, that will
make you feel good. It would make me feel better. It's a weird feeling. So not left out, not like
they don't praise you enough, but just something's missing. Yeah. DEBORAH TILLMAN: Then there's
the third Fitzgerald boy who's having issues, Garrett. Garrett has a genetic
condition called Down syndrome, just like
about 1 in 700 American kids. It just means that the
child may learn slower. They may have expressive
language delay, but that doesn't mean that
they can't function and learn at a level that
matches their age. Over the years, Jenny and Andy
had asked a lot of experts about effective ways
to work with Garrett, and I wanted to get
the lowdown from mom. How many people
have you met with? A lot. We've seen the cognitive,
the behavioral specialists, the language specialists. It doesn't feel like I'm
making a lot of progress. I'm tired. I'm frustrated. And have you
followed any of these? No, I mean-- What Jenny is doing by
getting all these assessments and not really following through
with anything is really just making herself feel good,
like I'm going to get all these recommendations,
just to make myself feel like I've done something. But when that same parent
doesn't follow through, that's what shows you if
they're really committed or not. So where is Garrett? Really, that's the
question of the day. Hey, Garrett? Now he's outside. Stop. Stop. Stop. Garrett. Oh, geez. Stop.
Stop. Stop. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
For the second time that day, Garrett ran out of the house. It was really, really scary. Stop. When you want to leave the
house, what do you say? It's not safe for you to be
outside by yourself, right? Go back to the house. It's been years that we've
been doing this, years, so since he was three. So for five years. Truly I understand how
overwhelming it can be to be a stay-at-home, not to mention
the fact that you have a child with special needs. But with that being
said, Jenny is the parent and she has to step
up to the plate. With Garrett safe inside
again, I sat down with mom for a breather. I've worked with a lot of
parents that have special needs children, and their hair
is about to be pulled out. Parenting is
really hard for me. Andy and I laugh about it. I'm great with people. I'm compassionate, but
I'm not structured. I'm not organized. I don't follow through. I get tired. It's like all these gifts
that I have are not the ones I need to be a good mom. I feel like all
the things I need to help these kids
grow and learn and become responsible
I'm lacking. I can't. I just can't. I can't be all that
my kids need me to be. It's just not who I am. Parents that have
children with special needs, they really do often
have feelings of guilt and that they don't measure up,
but for Jenny, it just seemed like it was at another level. I think that she doesn't
think she can do it. And when people think
that they can't do it, then they don't do it. One thing mom
definitely had trouble with was helping
Garrett with homework. We're going to do math. No. I know. No. Plenty of parents know
how trying homework is. It can be even more challenging
for some children with Down syndrome because they can't
focus for long periods of time. "Fran teaches 12 children." [inaudible] You have to go potty? No, no, no, no, no. Mom comes in already
thinking that this is going to be the worst disaster. I'm just going to have
to suffer through this. Garrett feels that. [grunting] No, no. We're not done. We're doing four more problems. Eventually, mom just gave
up and left most of the math unfinished. So why don't you go ahead
and put the blocks back? And I just think that sends
a poor message to Garrett. If the parent has low
expectations of the child, then the child's going to have
low expectations of himself. [music playing] Hello, hello. Where is everyone? Dad gets home from work, says
hi, bye, and then he's gone. I'm going to go upstairs, get
a little work done, all right? Thanks. JENNY: I know. Yes, no. Not quite sure what I
think about dad right now, but I'm feeling like
there is a disconnect. When I headed upstairs
to speak to dad, here's Garrett in
the bathroom, getting into all kinds of stuff. Is he supposed to be in here? No. Garrett, what are you doing? This is ridiculous. Nobody is up here watching
him, and dad is here. It's crazy to me that with
two parents in the home, Garrett is left unsupervised. [knock on door] I needed dad to get involved,
whether he wanted to or not. Oh my god. Hi.
- Hi. - Do you have a moment?
- I do. OK, just Garrett is
like in the bathroom. OK. - In your room.
- OK. And he's on the sink. Oh gosh, OK. Come on. Uh-uh, come on down. No, no, no, no. Garrett, come on. Let's not do that. DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): Dad's reaction was a lot like mom's, numb. How do you deal with
discipline with Garrett? That's the hardest thing, is
what do we expect him to carry out and actually do? So what expectations
do you have of him? I don't know. That's a good question. A lot of times it's just easier
just to either give up and not follow through on the discipline
or have a low expectation of a chore or homework. I have never, in 20
years of experience, dealt with a parent that said
they lowered their expectations of their child. That means that you're not
even expecting anything of the child, and that's
a horrible feeling. I'll talk to you later. Why is he leaving all of
the parenting up to mom? There is a disconnect with dad. I have seen enough today,
so I will be here tomorrow. There are a lot of issues here. Tomorrow morning, I'll
meet with mom and dad and I'm going to speak my mind. Thank you so much. ANDY: Thanks for coming. All of the things I'm going
to say are just the truth, and I want you to hear the truth
because that's the only way that we're going to be able to
make it better for the family. I am pretty nervous
about meeting with Deborah. We called it the
day of judgment. Let me first start out with
Garrett and Down syndrome. I actually heard it
from you yesterday, that you were at the point
where you just actually feel like you've given up. Mm-hmm. You've had a plethora
of assessments. You've had people to
come in and recommend so many things for you, but
it doesn't get implemented. Yeah, it's not used at all. And then dad, you mentioned
to me, which kind of almost broke my heart upstairs, that I
just don't have any expectation of Garrett anymore. I wouldn't say I've given up,
it's just I'm looking for help. I know you want
the best for Garrett. I know you believe,
like I believe, that children with Down
syndrome, they're special. But bottom line is
they can do stuff. Right. And I know it's a clich to
say it takes special parents to raise special children,
but bottom line is that is the truth, because it does take
patience and a whole lot more patience than the norm. It's hard work. But we have to remember that
it's all about the expectation and his feeling of how
you guys feel about him, and so that part
needs to change. I'm going to talk to dad. You came home yesterday, and
I know you went in the kitchen to say hi to everybody,
but then you went upstairs and you kind of do that,
I guess, every day. Mom's all day with the
kids and she shouldn't have to tell you, or ask you even. It should just be
like, let me help him with a couple of problems. Let me do some things
and just kind of step in. What was a little
bit more disturbing for me was the fact
that the door was close and that Garrett
being unsupervised. You didn't hear the water
and he was in the sink and he was in the room, and
I'm just like, OK, dad, really? We've kind of designated that
around 5 o'clock is when I'll be done with my work. It's a tough balance because
I have those responsibilities. Right. It's just a matter of where. We need you present. Tell me about the boys. Jake, he like
mopes around a lot. And what is going
on with Dawson? We do not know. It's like his
cup is half empty. All the time. He's very resentful,
very negative. And one thing that
I really noticed is that he couldn't look at
me, really poor eye contact. Hm. Have you noticed
any low self-esteem? Like what is going
on with Dawson? You look sad and you've
been crying because I see your eyes are red. Tell me what's happening,
because I'm here to help you. I know. I just love my kids and
I want to be a good mom. And you think what? Well, I mean, it's sad
we've not followed through and let them get away with
all they've gotten away with, and to hear that we're not
expecting enough of them. You know, it's not
what I want, so. And at the same time of
having poured your life into these kids and
experienced deep frustration and bewilderment on how to do
it and how to do it effectively. So it's just really
challenging and hard. Yeah. OK, and even with the
technique that I'm going to do, some stuff might
work, some might not. We're going to try
something else. We're going to keep trying
until we get it right, OK? Yeah. Hi. Hi, how are you? One of the first
things that I'm going to bring into this
household are family rules so that the entire family
knows what is expected and what's not expected. Use listening ears. Where's your ear? Yay. Where's everybody's ears? JENNY: Right here. Yay. It's not effective to
bring rules into the house unless you have
discipline attached to it. You have to make sure
that the discipline is appropriate to the age. Carly, who is three years old,
gets the Calm Down Corner. This is the corner that you have
to go to if you break a rule, OK? All the other kids get
lose what you like, meaning that if
they break a rule, they get something
taken away from them. So it's mom and dad, they're
going to decide what you're going to lose. Garrett, I need you to
follow the rules, OK? Garrett's discipline
is more specific because children with special
needs are visual learners. If you don't listen to the
rule, Ms Deborah takes a car. He loves cars, and so I started
Garrett with only five cars. And now he understands that
when a car is gone, uh-oh, I did something
that is not correct. Now, instead of having to
physically discipline Garrett, he'll have a visual indicator. And for all the
kids, now it's going to be clear that
when I break a rule, there are going to
be consequences. [music playing] While they're out here, can
we go maybe somewhere private, maybe up to your room
or somewhere like that? Yeah, OK. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Mom is utterly defeated, and that contributes to
the low spirits of everyone in the house, but it especially
stood out to me doing homework with Garrett. The fact that she doesn't
follow through, the fact that she gives up a lot, the
fact that she's not being positive and helping him is
bringing him down and not even making him try. So I thought it was important to
talk to her about implementing some achievable goals. I want you to wake up and make a
goal for yourself for that day. OK. So say, for example,
you're going to do homework with Garrett later. You might say, if
you're feeling good, I'm going to tackle
five problems today. That's my goal, and then I
want you to meet that goal. OK. That way, you always feel
successful in doing something. It's not only
important for Jenny to set attainable goals each
day for herself, but also for Garrett. When she follows through
and doesn't give up, then Garrett, in turn,
doesn't give up, either. I feel 100% different today. I feel like God heard my
cries and He sent you, so. Don't make me cry. That's really how I feel. But it's true. I am so in. I'm so committed. I'm ready. I'm really ready. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
With mom in higher spirits today, it was time to put some
achievable goals into action. Step one is simply to
decide what those goals are. How many problems are we going
to be able to get through? How many do you feel like?
- I'm going to say three. Step two is to allow Garrett
five minute breaks whenever he loses focus. The timer is only used when
he falls apart and wants to give up. Step three is to make
homework time fun with lots of positive reinforcement. Reading, star. When he finishes the
book, he gets a star. So every little thing Garrett
does he gets to celebrate. Garrett gets a sticker
for coming to the table. Wow. My energy level is very upbeat. Snow. They're making a snowball. Let's make a snowball. Just constant reinforcement. It's positive. We're giving some high fives. Whoo. Let me see your mouth. Oh, high five. I was so happy when
Garrett finished his math, and he's enjoying it. [laughter] Good job. This technique will
work for many children with many different
kinds of learning or developmental issues. It's certainly working wonders
for Garrett and his mom. Whoo. [music playing] DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
What I noticed in the house was that dad was
really disconnected. I'm feeling like dad is really
not a part of this process, that he's just going
through the motions, and I need to talk to him. When the children
are around, I still feel that there's something
like blocking you. With the boys, I don't see
you like really going to them. I mean, emotionally,
I'm there. Emotionally I'm their father. Emotionally I love them. I hear you saying the
words, but you know, with kids it's about really
them feeling the love. What I thought was
spending time with them, being at Dawson's practice,
watching him, talking to him. But I think that's what he
was saying, that he doesn't feel like you're talking, like
there's something missing there. And I don't know
what it is, but I wanted to bring it
to your attention, that there is something
missing with the boys. To make that assessment
that I'm uninvolved, I just didn't think
that was true. It's so important for Andy
to understand and to hear what his sons are saying to him. They're reaching out. They're trying to communicate
with him, but he's not hearing. That's a problem. I'm going to get to
the bottom of this. During my observation, I noticed
that Jake and Dawson weren't happy, and so I brought
them outside to do the How Am I Feeling technique. I need you to write down any
kind of feelings that you have. I know it's hard, but
I have to get it out of you because that's
the only way that it's going to get better. The How Am I Feeling technique
is designed to bring out the feelings and emotions of
children in a safe environment. OK, what's that one? I feel like people
at school care more about me than
people at home. Wow. My teacher always
says, how are you doing? What's up? If you need anything,
just pull me aside. And mom doesn't do that? She's never told me, if you
need anything, pull me aside. My dad is mean and he
never spends time with me. Wow. OK. And you say mean. Why is dad mean? Like he did soccer
with me one season and we had like six fights. He would always say,
you need to do better. You need to do better. So you don't feel real
close to your dad at all? Yeah. Wow. I feel like my life
is run by Garrett. It has to go with my dad not
paying any attention to me and my mom paying
attention to me. So it feels like all that my mom
and dad care about is Garrett. Do you know they love you? Well, they say that. I can't prove it. I mean, I do sort of feel like
it, but I don't know for sure. These little boys were holding
all of this emotion inside of them. This is why they
were moping around. This is why they
were so unhappy. Dawson and I were
open to the truth. We were also open to
sharing the truth. Do you think you want to
share this with your dad so that he knows
what's going on? It was important for
me to bring Andy in to let him know that we have a
serious conversation that needs to be had. If we can make sure that you're
not going to get in trouble, you will share the truth? Yeah. DEBORAH TILLMAN: OK. Hi, Ms. Deborah. Hi, Carly. The next day when I
arrive, Andy pulled me aside to say that he had something
to talk to me about. Last night was a rough night. You know our conversation. And I would love to talk more. Sure. I was actually excited. I thought that, you know,
he had a breakthrough. It seems to you
that I feel detached, uninvolved with what's going on. And as I've always thought
about my relationship with kids, the last thing I've
always considered myself is uninvolved or detached. If I thought he didn't
get it the night before, he really didn't get it
when I was talking to him. There is nothing that's more
important than what comes out of the mouths of babes, and
they said it themselves. They both said that dad
doesn't spend any time with us. This is what they see, and
they live with you every day. To me, it doesn't feel
like I'm uninvolved. It feels like I'm very involved. I'm there for dinner every day. Yes, you are
present for dinner. You show up, but showing up
and being in the moment, being in it, is different from
just sitting at the table and I'm here for dinner. But there is a bigger picture. I am there. And it's not just I'm present
and I'm somewhere else, I'm there. I was getting so frustrated
because there had been so many breakthroughs with mom
and with the children, Dawson and Jake. And then for dad, the
head of the household, he just wasn't getting it. The words came from them, and
so I know they're hard to hear. But that's not what it's about. It's not about you and
what's hard to hear for you. Absolutely. It's about them. And if they don't
feel it, that's when something has to be done. This is my second
conversation with dad and he's still clueless. His boys are reaching
out and he's just in his own little
world, not believing what I'm trying to tell him. So I'm going to let
the boys tell him. Remember we had the
conversation outside and we wrote some things down? This is your opportunity
to talk to mom and dad. I want you to read
it, and then I want you to really
expound and tell mom and dad what that means. "My dad is mean and never
spends any time with me." Dad? I'm sorry that
that's how you feel. I love spending
time with you guys, and I'd love to continue to
talk and find a place where it's just going to work
for everybody. What you just said, it sounds
like a lot of generalizations. I need to see, what
are you going to do? Dad talks a good game,
but the fact is inside, he still doesn't believe
there's a problem. I take Dawson to
three practices a week. I was Jake's soccer
coach last year. When dad mentioned he
was Jake's soccer coach, I was floored, because he didn't
mention what Jake had told me earlier, which was they
fought all the time. Quality time to me means
only two people, nothing else around you. So just you and me? Yeah. "I feel like my life is
ruined by Garrett sometimes because that's all my
mom pays attention to." And you don't feel like
you can pull when things are bothering you? I can't. You always say, I'm
doing this with Garrett. I'm doing that with Garrett. I need you to
tell me, well, what does feel like love to you? It means like
spending time with me. OK. It's just that I know you can
never do that because you do always have to be on Garrett. Mom seemed very much
like she wanted to hear what the boys had to say. She was asking questions. When you've told us
about your thoughts before, do you feel like we
get you in trouble? Well, yeah, sometimes. If you need to come to us
like this, we invite you. I feel like having a process in
place that we use every week, it'll help the boys because
they'll know that both of us are hearing them. This is not something
that's going to stop when Ms. Deborah leaves. The more you're open to it,
the more they will come to you. Right. Want to give hugs? Give hugs to mom and dad. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Mom, she got it. Her boys spoke to her and she
heard them, whereas dad, he's doing and saying all
the right things, but I don't know
if I believe him. Time will tell. [music playing] After I got mom and dad
talking with the boys, I had two final
tools that I wanted to leave with the Fitzgeralds. The first was visual aids. These visual aids
have Garrett's rules, which are the house rules. Say, for example, you asked
him to clean up and he's not, then you go to him, Garrett,
use your listening ears. Children with special
needs are visual learners. By connecting the picture to
the rule, it's easier for them to understand. Use your walking feet, and
then you actually show him. OK, this is running feet. This is walking feet. Let me see you walk. And so this is for you. DEBORAH TILLMAN
(VOICEOVER): Next thing was to keep Garrett safe
and inside the house. During my observation, I
noticed the locks on the door had been placed higher and
higher throughout the years in an attempt to keep them
out of Garrett's reach so that he wouldn't bolt. If
Garrett doesn't understand why it's important
not to go outside, then it doesn't matter that
they have three, four, 10 locks on the door. So I introduced my Stop,
Ask First technique. What does that say? Stop. Very good. And then what's the bottom say? Ask-- First. Ask first. Let's act like we're going
outside, and then we freeze. Say stop. Stop. We have to ask mommy or daddy. Ask daddy. And then what does mommy do? Yes, good asking. And she gives you a new car. Garrett responded
great to the cars. I mean, you bring out cars,
you've got his attention. I think it's a great idea. By putting the
Stop, Ask First sign at every door in the
household, Garrett is reminded that he has to stop
first and then he has to ask. You don't get a reward for doing
it second, OK, because this is about training and consistency. You always bring him back, and
then you show the sign again for reinforcement
and repetition. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
After getting that in place, the last step was the
daily schedule for Garrett. He's trying to
ask you something, so you want to tell
him what's going on. OK. Garrett, I'm talking
to Ms. Deborah. What did you want? I want to open door. You want to open door? Did you stop and ask first? Yes. Nice asking first. [screams] OK. Now for real, we're going
outside for that one. We're going outside, buddy. When Garrett
stopped at the door and he asked for me
to open the door, it was a wonderful experience. It was one of the best
moments of our lives. JENNY: [laughs] Go Garrett, go Garrett. And then when we went
outside and celebrated, that was the best. I mean, that was like pure joy. We need to learn to celebrate
every little victory that kids have. We finally have hope. After all that banging our
heads, we've got a solution. Go Carly. Go Carly. What a great moment. I'll be meeting
up with the family again soon to check
on their progress, but now is the perfect
time to say goodbye. Good job. [music playing] When I left the
Fitzgerald family, I was hoping that dad would
make a real connection with his kids. It's time for me to find out.
Hi. Hello. How are you? Good. I'm nervous about watching
the DVD with Deborah. You wonder, what is
she going to see? How am I going to fare? All right, well, let's see. We'll see what you say. [laughs] Oh, Garrett, listen. We're supposed to
Stop, Ask First. So let's go back. I won't. Garrett, let's go
back to the sign. Hey, Jenny, can you help me? Uh-uh-uh-uh. What? Hey, Jenny? What in the world? I didn't know
what to do with him. OK. He doesn't always
get up right then. It's OK. You're calling on
Jenny and we don't want to use her as a crutch. I really need you to get the
technique down so that you can do this in a confident manner. And I don't care how long
it takes, let's stick to it. What I do next? He said no. He didn't want to do it. So I make him go back, right? Yeah. Yeah. Come on inside. Come on. All right, let's go. Let's go take a bath. Will you come with me? Let's do it. OK, when you
brought him back in, we have to follow through
with the technique. We come back in, you go
right back to the sign, close the door. Stop, Ask First. You didn't stop, there
is no more cars left. So I can't take
any from empty box. He gets it, but you gotta
bring him back to that sign. That's the last thing
I want him to remember, is the visual of the sign. That's the only way we're
going to really get it down. All right, let's move on. Well, hello. Hello. Hello, hello. How are you? I'm good. How are you is the question. Guess how many
fights we've had today? Zero? None. Good job. I don't know who's family
this is, but I like this family. It's your family. It's our family.
- [laughs] I'll take it, too. Here, let's get some blocks. Wow, look at your tower. Here, I'll hold it. Good. [screams] This is so nice to see you
on the floor and having fun. I mean, Ms.
Deborah's happy, dad. [laughs] Good job. You know what's so cute, Jake
and Dawson both said to me, dad played blocks with
us for a long time. He kept playing with us. Oh my goodness. JENNY: You know, there
wasn't this time-- Before I might have done
it for like five minutes, just to touch base, but
then go do whatever's next. But it's that longer time where
there's not an x, that this is it. This is the most
important thing. DEBORAH TILLMAN:
That's the moment. Fantastic. I like this, dad,
what I just saw. It needs a little work. We all do, but keep it up. It's time to do our reading. What is he doing? He's making cakes. Hey, Garrett, it seems like
you need a little break. Do you need a break? OK. What is he doing there? He is making a painting. You're doing a great job. 13 plus-- 3 Equals. 16. 16. You write 16, and guess what? All done. Whoo-hoo. Whoo-hoo. You did it. You did it. You finished your homework. [screams] Who is she? Who is this woman? I don't recognize her
from the first day. I mean, that homework. You set your goal and
you followed through. Yeah. This is amazing, to see
that you have done a 180. You know, the biggest point for
me was when you said, all done. You did it, Garrett. You accomplished it. Thank you. You changing is
helping Garrett change. It took, I think,
an hour and 20 minutes to get through those. - Look at, and he did it.
- He did it. DEBORAH TILLMAN: He
did it and you did it. Yeah. And so don't be afraid to set
higher goals because there is nothing stopping Garrett from
doing what anybody can do. Yeah. I am really pleased. As you go forward, please
continue to do this. Continue to be the
anchor for the kids, in terms of being
positive and letting them know that some days might
be better than others, but I've got this,
and I can do this. Dad, the dad I saw with the
blocks, keep doing that, because that was great. DEBORAH TILLMAN (VOICEOVER):
Dad's finally made the turnaround I
was looking for. Mom's actually tried
her hardest all along. And I just want to make sure she
knows just how far she's come. I see a total
new woman in you. I know you told me when I first
met you that you didn't think you were the right woman for
this job, but as I stand here and look at you today, I
can say, without a doubt, you are exactly the
right woman for this job. You're who I needed to stand
beside me and believe in me, so thank you. - You're welcome.
- Thank you. You're welcome. When Deborah
said to me, you're the right person
for the job, man, it was like pouring healing
ointment on a wound. Keep up the good work. [music playing] Ms. Deborah's going to say bye. I enjoyed being with all of you. I wish she could stay a
little bit longer because she's so nice. He came to you. Daddy got a spanking
from Supernanny, but if that means that my
kids and I have a closer relationship, so be it. Bye bye, Garrett. Bye bye. Give me hug. I think we're
all more positive. We are looking forward
to experiencing more peace and love. I have hope for the future. OK, bye bye. Be good. Bye bye. I feel that the Fitzgerald
family is an inspiration to American families everywhere. The fact that they came
from a place that was so low and actually turned it around
in just a matter of a few days is something that families
can look at and say, if they did it, I can do it. [music playing]
