- Yo, this is dope. Okay. I wanna say thank you for givin' me the I Forgot I Was White Award. (audience laughs) It's so easy 'cause like
this (beep) is dope. And like it's so cool. I can't believe I'm here with
"Wild "N Out" with my people. This is like so, so cool. So, I just wanna thank Mariah Carey for doin' what you do, and then lettin' me steal
it and make it worse. (audience exclaiming) You know like (vocalizing). (audience laughs) One more thing. I wanna say that God is a woman, specifically a black
woman, specifically me. Thank y'all. Thank y'all. Thank you.
- "Wild "N Out." (audience cheering)
(mellow hip hop music) βͺ Yo βͺ βͺ My favorite clothes is Izod βͺ βͺ All my songs on an iPod βͺ βͺ Every time I dance, I dead βͺ βͺ I play all my games on the iPad βͺ (audience laughs) βͺ Girls fun-sized never be another me βͺ βͺ It's only one I βͺ (audience laughs) - Fetty Wap! (bell dings)
(crowd cheering) (mellow hip hop music) βͺ I gotta run out my red βͺ βͺ Run out my red βͺ (audience laughing) What? βͺ Hold on, wait a minute βͺ βͺ Y'all thought I was finished βͺ βͺ Would y'all drop that back to back βͺ βͺ My courageous ending βͺ βͺ It was my girl's song βͺ Meek Mill. - You feel.
- There it is. (audience applauding) - Come on. (crowd cheering) βͺ I'm the best singer of my time βͺ (imitates crying) βͺ Hello βͺ βͺ And I'm only 25 βͺ βͺ I've got 10 Grammy's but
I can't find a good guy βͺ βͺ Hello βͺ Adele! - Yeah!
(bell dings) (crowd cheering) (crowd exclaiming) βͺ I used to beat on this show βͺ βͺ And then Nick asked me to come back βͺ βͺ I was like, no, no, no βͺ βͺ I went on tour and got triple βͺ βͺ I got a new girl, but
she ain't got no nipple βͺ (audience laughing)
(audience applauding) - Kevin Hart.
- Yeah. (bell dinging) (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) - That's how you do it. (audience cheering drowns out speech) See if you can top that. (mellow hip hop music) (audience laughs) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Oh, yeah, turn me up. You're the best, turn me up. All right, here we go. All right. βͺ I come in the booth and rip
my shirt off like a maniac βͺ βͺ 24 inch pipe, got your
lady layin' on her back βͺ βͺ When it comes to wrestling,
it doesn't get much bigger βͺ βͺ But all the years I called you brother βͺ βͺ I really meant (beep) βͺ (audience laughs) - Hulk Hogan. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) - (laughs) Turn me up, sensational. (audience laughs) Shout outs, I met your girl in my Esko. (audience laughs) βͺ I'm glad to see how it's lost βͺ βͺ I'm glad to see how it's lost βͺ βͺ Turn it βͺ βͺ Russell Wilson, you
are not the baby daddy βͺ βͺ That is my son and you know it βͺ βͺ Know it, know it, know it βͺ βͺ Know it, know it, know it, know it βͺ - Future (laughs). - [Rapper] Yeah!
(bell dings) (crowd exclaiming) (crowd cheering) Oh God. - Turn me up some. βͺ See you loyal βͺ (audience laughs) βͺ We the best now βͺ βͺ Me the best βͺ (audience laughs) βͺ And you smart βͺ βͺ I'm on Snapchat βͺ βͺ Eatin' flapjacks βͺ (audience laughs) βͺ I got man tits βͺ βͺ On my hammock βͺ βͺ I'm the best βͺ - DJ Khaled.
- Thank you. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) - I'm just sayin', Trina did her best. But DJ D-Wrek who won?
- Y'all won. - Gold Team won that one,
now make some noise for 'em. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Lower the mic. - Oh funny. βͺ I didn't drive, but you know
I brought my sleigh here βͺ βͺ In the strip club,
I'ma make it rain there βͺ βͺ In a place a little boy took me βͺ βͺ And I'll wrap it if his
mom give me the cookie βͺ - Santa Claus.
(bell dings) - Oh, okay, okay.
(audience cheering) - Hear me out. βͺ I got weird outfits, I didn't plan it βͺ βͺ I perform at the Superbowl
better than Janet βͺ βͺ You know my word, ra-ra βͺ βͺ Ra-Ra βͺ - [Nick] Ra-ra? (buzzer buzzing)
(audience laughs) - [Nick] Who are you? - Lady Gaga. - Oh! (crowd booing) What? - Hey, yo. βͺ I don't need permission
to see your tush βͺ βͺ I won't ask when I grab
your George W. Bush βͺ βͺ I just replaced Obama βͺ βͺ How do I do that βͺ βͺ I guess I just proved that
orange is the new black βͺ (crowd exclaiming) - Donald Trump!
- Yes! (bell dinging) - Red Squad! Red Squad! That's what I'm talkin' about! The Red Squad is official! DJ go.
- Let's do it. - [Nick] Come to do what you came to do. - Come on, let's do it, man. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (mellow hip hop music) (crowd exclaims) βͺ Ah, look βͺ βͺ Goodbye to Young Money,
hello to Roc Nation βͺ βͺ Still sippin' Lean 'cause
that's my hydration βͺ βͺ If you can't mess
with me I got patience βͺ βͺ I just want a gimmick βͺ βͺ I got your cocaine leaf βͺ βͺ Yeah, baby, go on, baby βͺ βͺ You got me βͺ - Lil Wayne?
- You got me, yeah. (bell dings)
(crowd cheering) βͺ America, now βͺ βͺ In my pantsuits I
thought I was damn hot βͺ βͺ But even Trump didn't
wanna grab my damn (beep) βͺ βͺ If you didn't vote for
me because I'm a female βͺ βͺ I'ma catch you creepin' βͺ βͺ Leave you leakin' like an email βͺ - Ah, Hillary, Hillary Clinton! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (laughs) "Leave you leakin like an email." (audience cheering drowns out speech) βͺ I lick my lips 100 times βͺ βͺ Check it βͺ βͺ Your girl don't do me, she do me βͺ βͺ I get a (beep) in the
ocean and deep blue sea βͺ βͺ Yeah, if not her I put
her friend to sleep βͺ βͺ 'Cause they all screaming
God when I'm in too deep βͺ - Go, LL Cool J!
- My six pack's still activated, baby!
(bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Yell out for the Black Squad! - No. No.
- Yell out for the Black Squad! - No.
- Let's do it. - No. - Black Squad! - [Audience] Black Squad! Black Squad! - Who do y'all love? - Black Squad!
- So, yo, DJ D-Wrek, tell him who won the game? - I gotta go with the crowd on this one. Give it up for the Black
Squad, they won that one. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (mellow hip hop music) (audience laughs) βͺ Listen, probably don't
know my name shawty βͺ βͺ But look, I'ma go ahead,
spit some things, shawty βͺ βͺ I'm bein' sensitive all alone βͺ βͺ Everybody know, know the same βͺ - Drake.
- Drake fool! (bell dings)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) βͺ Listen, I'm 4'5" βͺ βͺ That's really sad βͺ βͺ I couldn't get on a ride at Six Flags βͺ βͺ I walk in your crib
and asked what's to eat βͺ βͺ My favorite line is yo
DJ D-Wrek, cut the beat βͺ - Conceited! (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) (bell dings) βͺ I know I'm pretty different than y'all βͺ βͺ I don't do hip hop βͺ βͺ I was married to Jenny,
Jenny from the Block βͺ - Puffy.
βͺ We had a breakup βͺ βͺ She wanted a bigger ring βͺ βͺ It's no bueno, I'm the salsa king βͺ (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) βͺ Salsa βͺ (buzzer buzzing) Ricky Martin? (audience laughs) Who was he? (audience cheering) Come on, man. βͺ Uh, uh βͺ βͺ Bigger than your average βͺ βͺ Uh, I like cornbread and cabbage βͺ βͺ Uh, work less, baby if you βͺ The king of Broadway, Biggie Smalls!
- Yeah! (bell dings)
(audience cheering) We did pretty good though, right? All right, Black Squad,
y'all think you can top that? - Yeah, we got that. - A'ight, well, Rocky. Y'all make some noise for Rocky. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Let's do this damn thing
man, you know what I'm sayin'? - Yeah. Do you. - Ah! Black Squad. Let's do it. (audience cheering) (audience laughs) βͺ What I've got to say
really isn't groovy βͺ βͺ I really wish The Rock
would do another movie βͺ βͺ And I'm sorry for what I did βͺ βͺ CPS, why'd you have to take my kid βͺ (audience laughs)
(audience cheering) Tyrese! (bell dings)
(audience cheering) (man in jacket laughs) (rapper hooting) βͺ Coogi down to the socks
like I'm biggie poppa βͺ βͺ Baby βͺ A$AP Ferg. (audience cheering)
(bell dings) (Rocky laughing)
(audience laughs) βͺ Some of that, what do I do βͺ βͺ Yow, baby, what do I do βͺ βͺ Yow βͺ (audience cheering drowns out singing) - There we go. Lil Uzi Vert. - Hey. (bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience booing) βͺ Yeah βͺ βͺ Hey, how are you doin' βͺ βͺ I'll give you what you need βͺ βͺ My news is so hot,
sometimes I'm over heatin' βͺ βͺ Stay tuned so you can
see what I'm gon' rap out βͺ βͺ Hold on, I think I'm 'bout to pass out βͺ (audience laughs) - Wendy Williams! (bell dings)
(audience cheering) - Hey, I can't front. The Black Squad came
through with a body hit. Who won? - I gotta give that to the Black Squad. Make some noise for
the Black Squad, y'all! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) βͺ Yo βͺ (rapper imitates crying)
(audience laughs) βͺ I really hate The Rock
in case you curious βͺ βͺ And if we had sex it won't
be "Fast & the Furious" βͺ βͺ I gave you a great
movie and a great CD βͺ βͺ What do you want from me βͺ βͺ What do you want from me βͺ - Tyrese. (bell dings)
(audience applauding) (audience cheering) βͺ I'm a island girl,
you heard what I said βͺ βͺ Me and D-Wrek got the same forehead βͺ βͺ Chris and Drake are a few of my fellas βͺ βͺ And if it rain you can
stand under my umbrella βͺ - Rihanna! (bell dings)
(audience cheering) βͺ Listen my loves, listen βͺ βͺ Listen, my loves βͺ βͺ Listen, listen my loves βͺ βͺ We need to stop βͺ βͺ We need to boycott
that man's barber shop βͺ - Mo-Nique!
βͺ Listen my loves βͺ Mo-Nique! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience exclaiming) What? Who is it? βͺ Okay, listen then βͺ βͺ Okay βͺ βͺ I'm on the Black Team,
usually I'm on the Red βͺ βͺ The team is the same color of my hair βͺ βͺ I keep rappin' and rappin'
and rappin' and rappin' βͺ βͺ For no reason βͺ βͺ I've been rappin' for
like four or five seasons βͺ Justina! (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) Red Squad! - All right, Black Squad, "Wild N' Out." (mellow hip hop music)
(audience cheering) βͺ And I change sound like a disco βͺ βͺ You on level one, bro βͺ βͺ Man, I'm on the fifth floor βͺ βͺ Yeah βͺ βͺ You probably never know I could spit βͺ βͺ You catch me in the hallway βͺ βͺ You're like oh my goodness βͺ - Martin.
- What's up? (bell dings)
(audience cheering) βͺ Hello βͺ βͺ Uh, uh, I'm so sad βͺ βͺ The whole world hates me βͺ βͺ I wanted a sugar daddy
but now I'm First Lady βͺ βͺ The media is mean,
they're always so pushy βͺ βͺ Oh no, Donald's coming βͺ βͺ To grab me by my (beep) βͺ (audience laughs)
(buzzer buzzing) - I am his wife. (audience laughs)
(audience cheering) βͺ Yo βͺ βͺ Hey βͺ βͺ Peek-A-Boo I look like a Twizzler βͺ βͺ 2016 my whole rep got bigger βͺ βͺ If I see a girl want only one night βͺ βͺ And if I see Joe Biden, we gon' fight βͺ βͺ Sail a boat βͺ - Lil Yachty, dog. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) βͺ The coloring book
shut the internet down βͺ βͺ I represent the Windy
City, the Chi-Town βͺ βͺ I drop albums for free βͺ βͺ 'Cause God got me three Grammy awards βͺ βͺ The record label couldn't stop me βͺ Chance? (bell dings)
(audience cheering) (audience laughs) βͺ A'ight, yo βͺ βͺ Listen, "Wild N' Out's" my only job βͺ βͺ I know someone can tell βͺ βͺ I can't DJ, but I can
press a buzzer or bell βͺ Right here, DJ D-Wrek! - Yes! (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) - Who won that game? - I gotta give it to the Red Squad. Make some noise for the Red Squad, y'all. (audience cheering) βͺ Yeah βͺ βͺ Uh βͺ βͺ Nigger-less boy, you a liar βͺ βͺ I know what really happened
between you and Mariah βͺ βͺ You ain't never supply her βͺ βͺ Your whole relationship washed up βͺ βͺ I hold my (beep) βͺ βͺ I brought you a dryer, yeah βͺ βͺ Baby, I need to fall βͺ βͺ Mariah, let me in βͺ - Drake? (bell dings)
(audience cheering) βͺ I was runnin' through my whole hood βͺ βͺ But I shouldn't have did that βͺ βͺ They sent me the bill βͺ βͺ I didn't think that I was coming back βͺ βͺ And I got the Rol-e-o βͺ βͺ Shoulda worn my other watch βͺ - You terrible, man. You is worthless.
- Calm down. You bein' so monotone. βͺ Miami Beach βͺ (audience laughs) βͺ Look βͺ βͺ Whoop, whoop that ass too fat βͺ βͺ I'm the baddest bitch the 305 did that βͺ βͺ Sex so good you better admit that βͺ βͺ You ain't my daddy, Nick βͺ βͺ Where the hell Trick at βͺ Hey, Trina! - Yeah!
(bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) βͺ Turn it, turn it βͺ βͺ Excuse me, hold up βͺ βͺ Ricky got so dirty, yo βͺ βͺ Turn it way up βͺ (audience cheering drowns out singing) βͺ I can turn it up βͺ βͺ Ai, yi, yi, yi, ya βͺ - Tekashi 6ix9ine. (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) That's what we did, we did that. βͺ I don't give a damn βͺ βͺ I kick everybody ass βͺ βͺ 'Cause you know what βͺ βͺ You ain't gon' never see me βͺ It's over, it's over. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) I got it. - All right, Black Squad "Wild N' Out." Yo, hold up, hold up, hold up. Hold up. - (laughs) Okay. βͺ The baddest bitch in the
game's on offset white βͺ βͺ Tell him, you know who βͺ βͺ I'll run up on her twice βͺ βͺ You wonder why I smoke βͺ βͺ It's gonna be a smarter βͺ - Cardi B, Cardi B, Cardi B,
Cardi B, Cardi B, Cardi B. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) βͺ Yo βͺ βͺ I be sittin' in the club βͺ βͺ And I go and take a shower βͺ βͺ And now that we've moved βͺ βͺ You can seat me up in power βͺ βͺ In the vat beef you know I'm to fear βͺ βͺ I'm the one that ended Ja Rule' career βͺ (audience laughs) 50, 50, 50. 50, 50, 50! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (rapper barking) βͺ Yo, yo βͺ βͺ Eh, yo, Swizz βͺ βͺ Throw me a bone βͺ βͺ I'm locked up at the moment βͺ βͺ But I can't wait to come home βͺ What? βͺ Yo βͺ What? What? What? DMX, DMX, DMX. What? (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) What? βͺ I started with the
friends when I was younger βͺ βͺ I was fine βͺ βͺ Hey, Swizz βͺ βͺ Now we married together
and you are mine βͺ Baby, is that you?
βͺ Two kids βͺ (bell dings) Baby, is that you? (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (bell dinging) (buzzer blaring) - Who won, D-Wrek? - I'm gonna have to go ahead
and give it to the Black Squad. Make some noise for
the Black Squad, y'all. They came to play. - Right y'all. (mellow hip hop music)
(audience cheering) βͺ I lose myself in the music βͺ βͺ But I'm still hot, you will fly βͺ βͺ MGK just gave you a kill shot βͺ - [Audience] Oh! βͺ Smooth with the pain βͺ βͺ Take out you and a friend βͺ βͺ Already killed Nick Cannon βͺ βͺ Don't make me do it again βͺ - First of all, he ain't killed (beep). (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) Eminem. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) (audience exclaiming) - Turn me up a little louder, Nick. I need some water (laughs). (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) Need a little water. βͺ I say yo, I say yo βͺ βͺ A'ight βͺ βͺ Styles I got it βͺ βͺ Yeah, don't make me send a shot to ya βͺ βͺ I did a song with Mariah before
you even had got with her βͺ βͺ I black out like it's Gothika βͺ βͺ I need more water βͺ - Jadakiss. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) That was a good impression. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (rapper vocalizing) βͺ Dolla $ign, Dolla $ign βͺ (rapper vocalizing)
(buzzer blaring) - You said Dolla $ign. βͺ 'Cause only you βͺ βͺ No one knows, no one knows βͺ βͺ I need you βͺ - That doesn't sound
nothin' like Ty Dolla $ign. (rapper in camo vocalizing)
(buzzer buzzing) (audience laughs)
(mellow hip hop music) (audience cheering) βͺ Listen, uh, I don't rap βͺ βͺ But I'll own all your publishin' βͺ βͺ Take that, take that, take that βͺ Diddy! (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) βͺ Uh huh βͺ βͺ Now, now βͺ βͺ I sound like Cookie
Monster when I rap on beat βͺ βͺ And when I do shows, 50
Cent buys all the seats βͺ βͺ I used to make a song
called "Holla, Holla" βͺ βͺ Now a brother needs
some dollas, dollas βͺ (audience laughs) Ja Rule! (bell dinging) (buzzer blaring) Hey, well maybe the Black Squad can do it better than me. Y'all make some noise for TJ. (audience cheering)
(record spinning) - All right, hold on, hold on, for real. They got one wrong before we go again. - Yeah, we got that, we got one.
- He got one wrong, he got one wrong. - All right, what he snitchin' for? - Come on, bruh. If I was snitchin' I'd tell where you got them pants from. - All right, Black Squad "Wild N' Out." βͺ Yo, listen βͺ βͺ All right βͺ βͺ Got a lotta music in my iPod βͺ βͺ And I only wear IZOD. βͺ βͺ If I was an X-Men I'd be Cyclops βͺ βͺ And I only eat at IHOP βͺ βͺ I need a new eye again, baby βͺ (audience laughs) - All right, all right, all right. Fetty man, Fetty Wap, man. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) Fetty, Fetty, that was
Fetty Wap there, man. βͺ Yeah, yeah βͺ βͺ Eh, look βͺ βͺ I'm a urban legend with this βͺ βͺ Wise words bein' recorded
like a pocket (beep) βͺ βͺ You know βͺ βͺ At the VMAs, at the VMAs βͺ βͺ Sittin' in the back next to two tanks βͺ βͺ Money ain't a thing,
yeah you know my name βͺ βͺ The marathon continues βͺ βͺ I'ma do my thang βͺ Nipsey. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) Let's get power. (audience laughs) βͺ Uh, I'm the man of steel βͺ βͺ Yeah, I'm your homie βͺ βͺ I don't eat beef βͺ βͺ Unless it's Kobe βͺ βͺ I'm a cop, but you gotta understand βͺ βͺ Before Will Smith was
the Genie, I was Kazaam βͺ Shaq. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) - For real? A'ight, it go like this. βͺ I said new gun, pow, pow βͺ βͺ Face scratch, Bow Wow βͺ βͺ Chris Tucker, June Tao βͺ βͺ I'm on stage right now βͺ (bell dinging) - I sound like that? (buzzer blaring) - Y'all are cheatin'. Yo, I think I know the answer. DJ D-Wrek, who won? - 2 Chainz guessed the most, so the Black Squad wins. Make some noise for the Black Squad. Old School, "Wild N' Out." βͺ Uh βͺ βͺ I put the cookies in the
oven till the bake is done βͺ βͺ And told the whole world
that Drake got a son βͺ βͺ I was a kid, I'm in the classroom βͺ βͺ I make noises like I
just smelled the bathroom βͺ βͺ Yuck βͺ βͺ Yuck βͺ - Pusha T? - Ah yeah!
(bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (rapper shrieks) βͺ There for you little juvenile boy βͺ βͺ I'ma tell you one thing βͺ βͺ I'ma make it real clear, boy βͺ βͺ You don't know who I am βͺ βͺ You better bring that ass here, boy βͺ βͺ Queen of the mean school βͺ βͺ So I'm on the bench side βͺ βͺ Make some noise if you
reppin' the west side βͺ DC Young Fly.
(bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) βͺ Oh βͺ βͺ Been snitchin' since first grade βͺ βͺ And still ain't got no stitches βͺ βͺ I don't care if he did it βͺ βͺ I'm still gon' snitch βͺ βͺ Call me Mr. This Way βͺ βͺ Call me Mr. That Way βͺ βͺ I snitch three times βͺ βͺ You can call me Mr. Tray Way βͺ βͺ Oh, yeah βͺ Oh, Tekashi. (bell dinging) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (rapper vocalizing) βͺ Yeah, yeah, yeah βͺ (rapper vocalizing) βͺ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah βͺ Young Thug? - Yeah (beep). (bell dings)
(audience cheering) (buzzer blaring) - Yo, all right guys, you
think you can beat that? - Let's go. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - All right, New School, "Wild N' Out." - Y'all better come on with it. - I got it, I got it, I got it. βͺ Mm, mm βͺ βͺ We gettin' money βͺ βͺ Mm, mm βͺ βͺ We gettin' money βͺ All right, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. - Kevin Hart, Kevin Hart! (bell dings)
(audience cheering) Who's next? Hurry up! Let's go. βͺ You know who I be βͺ Megan Stallion! - Ah!
- Yes! - Ah!
- Hey! Hey, come on, let's go, hurry up! (audience laughs) βͺ I (beep) around and got hurt, bitch βͺ βͺ (beep) itchin' and it's burnin' βͺ (rapper vocalizing) - She grown, she don't know who that is. (Lala vocalizing) - Who is that? Come on, big man. βͺ I just took a DNA test, found out βͺ βͺ All you skinny haters hate
when I have my ass out βͺ βͺ But I love it so βͺ βͺ The truth hurts when you
see me comin' for you βͺ βͺ I'm big, black and beautiful, BBW βͺ Oh, Lizzo. - Yeah!
- Yes! Yeah! (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) (buzzer blaring) - Good goin'. Definitely doin' good. Yo, who won, me or Lala? - It was real close, but I
gotta give it to the Old School. (audience cheering) - "Wild N' Out." (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) (voicemail beeps) - [Man] Tell me that you
ain't here right now. - I ain't here right now. - [Man] Tell 'em you in the studio. - I'm in the studio. - [Man] Tell 'em we
don't want know mediocre. - I don't want no mediocre. (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) (bell dings) (audience cheering) (voicemail beeps) - First of all, if y'all niggers
were smokin' (indistinct). (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) And if there's cube, where is my money? (audience laughs)
(bell dings) (audience exclaiming) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (voicemail beeps) βͺ (vocalizing) Leave a message βͺ (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) (bell dings) (voicemail beeps) - A$AP. - [Audience] A$AP! - Hey man, I ain't here right now. I'm just layin' back,
chillin', you know, PMF, pretty mother (gasps), shut you mouth. Hey man, listen, I gotta a
effer in parlor right now, so I'ma get back to you, peace. (bell dinging)
(audience applauding) (audience cheering) (voicemail beeps) - Reach your man, Kanye West, and I ain't messin' with no gold digger. Oh, I married her. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (bell dinging) - Yo, DJ D-Wrek, who won that game? - Platinum Team got the most bells. Make some noise for the
Platinum Team, y'all. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - [Nick] We gon' go first. - [Audience] Oo! (audience exclaims) - Okay, man. (voicemail beeps) (audience laughs) - This is Fetty Wap. I know I sound African,
don't worry about it. (audience laughs) Leave a message. I'll call you back if I mess with you. If I don't mess with you,
maybe we don't see eye to eye. (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) (bell dings) (audience exclaiming) (audience cheering) (voicemail beeps) - Hey, what's up, y'all? It's your man, Steve. I'm just pickin' up my
suit from the dry cleaning, gettin' my head shined,
so I'll return your call. Oh, uh, I'm actually home. (bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - [Man] Oh! (Nick laughing)
(audience cheering) (voicemail beeps) - What's up mother soakers? (audience laughs) You have reached the voicemail of the blackest dude on the planet. - Shut up. This is my voicemail. You've reached Michael Blackson. If I owe you money, you
have the wrong number. (buzzer buzzing)
(audience laughs) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (voicemail beeps) - Hi. You've reached the answerin'
machine of LeBron James. I just wanna say... Where'd you go? My fault. That's my headline, he said
he movin' on without me. (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) You know, I just wanna thank the whole Cleveland organization for this- - Forget it, baby.
- Chris, boss, we not on teams no more, man. (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) (bell dings) (audience cheering) - [Woman] Yas, queen. (voicemail beeps) - What's up? You done reached the man, Stevie J. I'm not here right now. - Phoebe, Phoebe, Phoebe, you
always keepin' me outta stuff. I hate that. Let em do it. (voicemail beeps) You reached Joslyn and Phoebe. - Now hold on,
- And I need to- why you keep sayin' Phoebe? My name is Stevie. I ain't no Phoebe, man. You always playin'. - You know what? No, no, you playin'. I've been waitin' for
my hit for the longest, and I've been waitin',
I've been waitin' for it. Where's my hit, Phoebe? - Rick Ross already gave
you your biggest hit. For real. (audience exclaiming) No, no.
(bell dings) (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) (audience exclaiming) (voicemail beeps)
(audience laughs) - Hello, I'm Stacey Dash, and if you're black
don't you dare call me, 'cause I need that
check and you know what? Black History Month, what is that? What is black? I'm all white. White pride. (audience laughs)
(bell dings) (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) - Wow, they're confident
over there, D-Wrek. Who won that game? - Hey, I gotta say the
Platinum Squad won that one. Make some noise for 'em, y'all. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - You like that? You like that? Uh, uh, ah. (audience cheering) (voicemail beeps) Hi, you have reached Childish Gambino, and these are my messages. βͺ These are my messages βͺ βͺ These are my messages βͺ βͺ They are my messages βͺ βͺ I just missed a call βͺ βͺ These are my messages βͺ βͺ These are my messages βͺ βͺ Uh, uh, I just missed a call βͺ (bell dings)
(audience cheering) (voicemail beeps) - Hey, this is Jason Lee. I'm real famous, in my head. I can't come to the phone right now 'cause I'm real busy, real busy gaining all the weight Perez Hilton lost and trying to be him, and if this is Nicki Minaj, your lawyer can call my lawyer. Okay, I'm not gonna stop
talkin' about you, bye. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (buzzer blaring) - This might be the pettiest episode of "Wild N' Out" ever. DJ D-Wrek, who won that game? - I gotta give that to the Black Squad. Make some noise for the Black Squad. Okay, the next battle is
Russell Wilson versus Future. - [Man] Oh! - [Man] Come on, come on big boy! Come on, big duddy. βͺ My mix tapes is fire βͺ βͺ I make the world get live βͺ βͺ You heard of Beyonce βͺ βͺ Well, this the Future hive βͺ - [Audience] Oh! βͺ Lean, lean, lean, dirty βͺ βͺ I'll roll one βͺ βͺ Stop bein' a step daddy βͺ βͺ Get your own son βͺ - [Audience] Oh! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Go on! - All right, it goes like this. Okay. You say I need to get my own son, save that for another segment. 'Cause unlike you, I'm actually gonna make her my wife before I get her pregnant. - [Audience] Oh! - How whack is that?
- A baby? - So, I don't care how much
dirty Sprite you drink, bro, to me you're just a loser. So you need to change your name to Past, 'cause I'm Ciara's Future. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Those score on that one. (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) - [Nick] DJ D-Wrek, who won? - Gold Team wins. Make some noise! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Let's go! - All right, your first battle is... - [Audience] Oh! - Amber Rose versus Kanye West. (audience laughs) - No one else wants it? - Amazing, boy.
- All right, I'll be Amber Rose. (audience laughs) I'm not scared. βͺ Straight off the top,
bald as the day I was born βͺ βͺ But if ya mess with this Rose, Kanye βͺ βͺ You'll still get the thorns βͺ - [Audience] Oh! βͺ I know we broke up 'cause
that's the way it had to be βͺ βͺ Still got ya wrapped around my finger βͺ βͺ That's your dark, twisted, fantasy βͺ (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, all right. - [Man] All right! - I left you 'cause you
give average (beep). - [Audience] Oh! - Kicked you out the car,
you can slut walk home. - [Audience] Oh! - I don't want you. You just a stripper from my past. - Oo.
- But before you leave, Amber, one more finger up my (beep). - Four, four. (audience cheering drowns out speech) We gonna do this? - All right, the Platinum
Team won that one, so make some noise for 'em, y'all. - Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! - Okay, your next battle
is iPhone versus Android. (audience laughs) - [Man] Let's go, let's go, man, let's go. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Okay, you know what they say. A Apple a day keeps the Android away. (audience laughs) my texts' are blue, you really don't know me. Android's got the knockoff emojis. (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) You see what I did there? You see what I did there?
- Settle down, settle down, settle down. You done let the hype
get all in your head, I need my thumbprint to use you, homie, you the feds. (audience laughs) So I'ma talk like Suge
Knight to fill in the void. If y'all don't want the
police all in your phone, come to Android. - [Man] Yeah! (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) - Platinum Squad won that one. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) Your next battle is Mike
Tyson versus Deontay Wilder. - Let's go. (audience cheering drowns out speech) - I'm right here, Lois. - Yo, who is Deontay Wilder? He stole my whole style. I guess he's the real biter. Never heard of him in my life. Is he even a real fighter? - [Audience] Oo! - I got you, I got you. I'ma lay with it. Back in the day we was
all scare of you, Mike. You shoulda won the Best Thug Award, but it's 2016 and now you gettin' knocked out by hover boards. (audience exclaiming) (audience applauding) - Broke my back.
- Listen, listen. (audience laughs) - My back was broken. (audience laughs) - Well, we about to break your back again 'cause your whole generation
is gettin' wiped out. You know what, Tyson? I'm tired of battlin' you. Eh, yo, champ? - Yo, chin up, I'm 'bout
to knock your lights out. - [Audience] Oh! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Platinum Team takes that one. Make some noise for 'em. (bell dinging) - 'Sup, Jay? 'Sup Jay? Eh, yo, keep your distance! There's no violence. - I got him. - No violence, hey, man, quit. DJ D-Wrek, who won the game? - Platinum got the most knockouts. Everybody make some noise
for the Platinum Squad. The battle is Nick Cannon
versus Affion Crockett. (crowd booing) - Yo, yo, yo. Listen. That was yo catch phrase. That's what you always
used to say on this show. But you never listened. That's why I had to get rid of you, bro. - [Audience] Oh! - See? I tried to teach you the game. Tried to show you how to rock, but now I gotta change yo
name to Affion Crockett. (beep) - [Audience] Oh! - Listen, Nick Cannon, I'm basically better than you, at bein' a man, a human being, and a "Wild N' Out" veteran, too. - [Audience] Oh! - Now we gon' go back and forth, and it's all in fun. By the way, I slept with your girl, thanks for raisin' my son. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - And the winner is the Black Squad. - Damn!
(bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) The battle is Michelle Obama
- Oo, I got this one. - versus Omarosa.
- Oh. - All right.
- Oh, wow. - [Audience] Oh! - Y'all see me on "The
Apprentice" with Trump. That was lights out. Ha ha. No matter how pro black you
and your husband may be, you still lived in the White House. - [Audience] Oh! - [Girl In Black Hat] What up? - Omarosa, I'ma roast ya. You whack and irrelevant. My husband Barack was the
first black President. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) Now, I'm here to elevate the people. Give hope and inspire. You're only good at two things, and getting fired.
- Fired. - [Audience] Oh! (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) - And the winner is the Red Squad. (bell dings) - You're fired. - All right, the battle is
Kendall Jenner and Kylie Jenner. - [Audience] Oh! - Let's go! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - I'm not in it for gold, bitch. I've got class. Your fake lips is bigger
than your fake ass. - Oh. - You may be my sister
but I just sunned you. - [Audience] Oh! - Kendall, you're flatter than a Kindle. - Talk to 'em. - A$AP Rocky dumped you, it makes me sick. How you supposed to hold our attention when you can't even hold a relationship. And I don't promote doin' drugs, it's very controversial, but I started doing coke
after your commercial. - [Audience] Oh! - And the winner is the Black Squad. - Yeah!
(bell dings) (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - The battle is Hitman versus Vic Mensa. - Oh!
- Uh oh. - You got this, Vic. - Get this.
- Hey, "Wild N' Out," let's give a round of applause to Vic. He was signin' Kanye West. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) Now, by the time y'all got
done clappin', Kanye left. - [Audience] Oh! - I mean, I don't drink or smoke, 'cause I can do sober. You from the Windy City, oh, that explains why
your career blew over. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Listen, Vic came equipped. I know you used to bangin' (beep). That's why I wore this all blue fit 'cause you ain't own (beep). - [Audience] Oh! - You never been a shooter, you might as well be sterile. This (beep) is supposed to be a gangster, his real name is Gerald. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) That's his real name. That's his real name. - And the winner is for
the game and the game, Black Squad, make some noise. (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) The battle is J. Cole
versus Kendrick Lamar. - [Audience] Oh! - Yo! You know how we get down for 85 show. We ain't even gon' do all that. We gon' switch it up. - What you wanna do? - I'ma be alcohol. - I'll be a blunt. (audience laughs) - [Red Squad Member] A'ight. - How you gon' mess with him? How you gon' get home? I mean, you might as well roll up some of me and take like
three or four to the door. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Yeah, they can smoke you, and get all paranoid about, "Oh, please, don't push me." (audience laughs) But guess what? - When you drink me, you guarantee some (beep). - Oh!
(audience cheering) - Yo! Yo, dog! Anybody with some sense know that drinkin' ain't the answer. People who drink you are assholes, and I'm out here curin' cancer. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - And the winner is, the Black Squad. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) The battle is G-Eazy versus Eminem. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Eminem, your first album
sold 10,000,000 records. In 2001 you was too sick, but your last album flopped
so let's just prove nowadays you couldn't sail on a cruise ship. - [Audience] Oo! - Your career on its last lifeline, I don't care what they got to say. Your reputation almost dead. You gon' really need your friend, Dr. Dre. - [Audience] Oo! - [Woman] Go (beep) G! βͺ I paved the path for Caucasian rap βͺ βͺ And now I don't even need
to go and say it's fact βͺ βͺ 'Cause every time you in the studio βͺ βͺ You playin' my track for inspiration βͺ βͺ Even though you straight up trash βͺ - [Audience] Oo! βͺ And you should give
me a Father's Day gift βͺ βͺ Every time that you see me βͺ βͺ 'Cause without Eminem βͺ βͺ There'd be no G-Eazy βͺ - Oh!
- Oo! (audience applauding)
(audience cheering) - And your winner is the Black Squad. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) Your battle is The Rock versus Tyrese. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) - You might be waitin' on that movie role, but that's somethin' you will never get, because your ass always
cryin' like a little bee-otch, on the internet. (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) - I was only cryin' on the internet 'cause I miss my baby. (audience laughs) But if you keep on talkin' crazy, I'ma have sex with your sweet lady. - [Audience] Oh! - Okay. Talkin' about sweet ladies, there's somethin' you need to know. I rock bottom your (beep), and gave it my people's elbow. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - And the winner is the Red Squad. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) The battle is Russell
Westbrook versus Kevin Durant. - Let's go! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - I left because you played crazy, bruh, all over and mad wild. Ain't it crazy that this
(beep) one look like a reptile? - [Audience] Oh! - Wow. - Oh, you upset 'cause I moved and went to a better team. Oh, I know why he mad, 'cause the real (beep) got that ring. - [Audience] Oh! - [Man] Yeah! - See, now when you did that move I was tryin' to be extra silent. You got a ring from
somebody that beat you. That wasn't a trade,
that's domestic violence. - [Audience] Oh! - Woo! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - A trade? - And the winner is the Red Squad. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) The battle is Nick versus Trick. - Ball game. - Come on, boy! - What up? Might as well call me a barber 'cause I'm 'bout to cut up. - Uh huh.
- Hey! - What was that? "Uh huh?" Okay, shut up. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience cheering drowns out speech) - Oh, I got you. - Now, Nick, this is yo show, and your team is funny,
that's on thing I know. But bein' that I'm the daddy kinda man, here's some (beep) I gotta let you know. - Okay.
- You're no man (beep). Can't represent like me. Who will save (beep) like me. βͺ One to look like me βͺ (beep) (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) - Y'all make some noise for Trick Daddy. - [Audience] Trick daddy! - Who won the game?
- Make some noise for the Red Squad, y'all. - Red Squad! - Your battle is Hailey
Baldwin versus Selena Gomez. - [Audience] Oh! - Boy, get out there! - All right. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - You stupid skinny bitch. (audience laughs) I'll address the rumors,
I'ma put an end to this. I left Justin Bieber 'cause I got tired of people askin' am I
datin' Ellen DeGeneres. (audience laughs) And to keep it real, I'm taller than you. Bitch, you ain't poppin'. I gotta 100,000,000
more followers than you. You stupid skinny bitch. (audience laughs)
(audience cheering) - Selena, Justin will leave you for this white bread everyday. Why am I somebody you
wanna come in step to? It's like every day for you is a Monday how The Weeknd just left you. - [Audience] Oh! Everything you say online, but what you say to my face. It's ironic Justin made you disappear, but weren't you the
"Wizard of Waverly Place?" (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Bitch! You skinny bitch! - Cut it out. - The winner is the Red Squad. Make some noise for 'em. (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) - Red Squad! - That's what it is, brother. - The battle is the English
language versus Cardi B. (audience laughs) - That's mean. We tryin' to get her on the show. (audience laughs) - Congrats on the baby. You spelled Kulture with a K. You misspelled that, so (beep) I ain't got nothing else to say. (audience laughs) - Okay, okay. No, no. I don't need to learn you, 'cause I'm Cardi B. I don't even need a degree, because I let my smoney talk for me. - [Audience] Yeah! - And your winner is the Black Squad! Make some noise. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) The battle is second Aunt
Viv versus first Aunt Viv. - [Audience] Oo! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - When it comes to the battle, I get told I'm the worst mom. - Facts. - But yet, my money fill up
banks ever since I took yo job. - Oo!
- Oh! - Fill up banks.
- Woo! - So, this who they got to replace me? I been on way more seasons than you, sis. And in all them episodes, I never seen you do this. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - And your winner is the Black Squad. Make some noise for 'em. (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) (buzzer blaring) - Who won? - All right, I gotta give
that to the Black Squad. Make some noise, y'all. Your battle is Lil Fizz versus Omarion. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) - Go first. (audience laughs) - You still made I slept
with your baby mom? - Yeah. - Well, go ahead fool. Make a move. (audience laughs) - That didn't make you the man 'cause you slept with April first. That just made you April Fool. - [Audience] Oh! - And I can't wait for
her to come back for more. (laughs) And there's only
one thing left to say, can you please let me
back on tour, please? Please? I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - Shut up! (audience laughs) You disloyal, full ass bitch made punk! - [Audience] Oh! - I'm 'bout to beat you badly. You was a background
singer your whole life. - I was, I was.
- Now you just a backup daddy. - [Audience] Oh! βͺ 'Cause I got a icebox
where my heart used to be βͺ (audience laughs) βͺ Now Bow Wow got your spot next to me βͺ (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Yes! (audience laughs) - And your winner is, Omarion. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) Your battle is Jess Hilarious
versus Michael Blackson. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) - (beep) you, mother (beep). I used to be a fan. I wanted to (beep) you, but I found out you are a man. (audience laughs) - (beep) you look like me. (audience laughs) I ain't gonna rhyme, I'm just gonna tell you how black you is. (audience laughs) You look like under the bed. (audience laughs) Stevie Wonder sees you everyday. (audience laughs) - Okay, okay mother (beep), okay. I am black as (beep). But please don't hate. I got one confession. This accent is fake and I'm
not even feelin' it for real, and I'm not even African,
I'm just black as (beep), so that's just where it ends. (audience laughs) - (beep) you. (audience laughs) Your mom and your pop is (beep) as you. (audience laughs) - And the winner is Jess Hilarious. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) The Michael Blackson version. The battle is 50 Cent
versus Floyd Mayweather. - Yo. (audience cheering out drowns out speech) - Hey, yo, feel. See, we realize that you
can fight and all that, but it's a shame that your old girl was Nelly typin' all that. - [Audience] Oh! - Now I know you got dumb money and dumb ice and all
that, but you a dummy, you can even read and write and all that. (audience laughs) - Talk freely. (audience laughs) - Told you. See?
- You got it, you got. - "I'm, I... (audience laughs) I don't like your energy. (audience laughs) All them loan outs got you sour. Everybody hates you,
like Terique on power. (audience laughs) Do you..." - Sound it out. - "You think 'cause you big and bad, and been sat nine times." - What up?
- Uh huh. - Give it to me. Where you at? - "You don't even get along
with your oldest son." - Sons. - "Because that (beep) really mine." - [Nick] Yeah! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Well, the way you was readin' that note, I think you should get your pockets padded
like my J. Leather. And at your funeral they
gon' bring wildflowers. You know what that is? Mayweather. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Floyd's first loss ever. 50 Cent wins this, so make
some noise for 50 cent. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) The battle is Kanye versus
Jesus, versus white Jesus. (audience laughs) βͺ You're gonna need the priest βͺ βͺ Revelation, go ahead
and feed the beast βͺ βͺ You tryin' to cross me, βͺ βͺ I'll leave his body holy βͺ βͺ When I pull out that Jesus peace βͺ (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) βͺ I said your heart full of apathy βͺ βͺ I don't care who your pastor be βͺ βͺ You take my name in vain βͺ βͺ And you're gonna get a blast from me βͺ (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Bitch! (audience laughs) Now I don't you got millions and millions and millions of servants, but I got Kim K pregnant. You still a virgin. (audience laughs) And guess what? I got a picture of your
moms, the Virgin Mary, on a candle on my nightstand. - Okay, okay. - And we all know, Jesus
Christ ain't no white man. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) βͺ I said you better be
believin' that acapella βͺ βͺ I don't even need the track βͺ βͺ You say Jesus wasn't white βͺ βͺ Well, I 100% agree with that βͺ (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (Nick laughing) - [DJ D-Wrek] And your
winner is, White Jesus. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (bell dinging) (buzzer blaring) - That was a hell of a game, man. Who won? - It was close but I gotta
give that to the New School. Make some noise for the New School, y'all. New School, they came to play! Stevie Wonder. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) - No, no, no. This is the award. - Thank you, Nick Cannon. (audience laughs) You know, I came a long
way from the streets. I used to push keys, and as young people I'm
inspirin' like the dude Fetty Wap is tryin' to be like me. I don't mind. Fetty, I just want you to know I see you. (audience laughs) And keep workin' 'cause
you're halfway there. Thank you. (audience laughs)
(bell dinging) - And the winner is... - [Audience] Oh! - [DJ D-Wrek] Faizon. - [Man] Yo, congratulations! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) (audience member whooping) - Aw, man, I don't know what to say, but it's about time they give this to a real (beep) out here. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) - And the winner is, Odell Beckham. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) βͺ Hey, hey, hey βͺ βͺ Ah βͺ - A'ight. I just love to dance, I'm so sorry, but... Thank y'all for givin' me this Ball Catcher of the Year Award. (audience laughs) I just wanna give a shout out
to all the Giants out there. If you a Giant, I like Giants. (audience laughs) (bell dings) I wasn't finished yet, but okay. (audience laughs) (rappers vocalizing) (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) - D-Wrek! Who won? - I'ma do you a favor. I'ma give it to the Gold Team. Make some noise, y'all. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Gold Team! - And the award goes go to Dezigner. - Let's go! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (rapper vocalizing) (rapper coughing) - I'd like to thank everyone, (audience laughs) for voting for me for Most
Lyrical Rapper of the Year Award. I'd like to thank my vocal coach for tellin' me that to be a
successful rapper nowadays, you don't need to rap. (audience laughs) You don't even need to say words. On that note, I just wanna say from the bottom of my heart (vocalizing). (audience cheering)
(bell dings) - And the award goes to, D. Rose. - Hey y'all. (audience laughs) (beep) (Nick laughing) - Get up there, Derrick,
get up there, Derrick. Yeah! - Thank y'all so much for this
Basketball Longevity Award. (audience laughs) I dedicate this one to God! I just ripped my armpit (groans). (audience laughs) You can do it, D. Take a deep breath (inhales). Two deep, I punctured my lungs. Goodbye. (audience laughs)
(bell dinging) - And the award goes to Colin Kaepernick. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Oh man, woo! Oh, man, this is pretty cool, pretty cool. So thankful to get this Standup
Player of the Year Award. I'm so thankful. I wanna thank my- βͺ Oh, say can you see βͺ - [Nick] Yeah! βͺ By the dawn's early light βͺ - And the award goes to Kevin Durant. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Let's go (indistinct). KD! - Wow (chuckles). The MLP, Most Loyal Player Award. This is crazy. I'd like to thank the fans
of Oklahoma, uh, uh, uh... Golden State Warriors, my bad. - Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, KD, man, you forgot somethin', bro. - What's this? - That's a brush. (rapper blows raspberry) - I don't use no brush. And to the Black Team. - What's that?
- You know what I'm sayin'? Look like y'all win.
- What? - So if y'all need somebody next season, holler at your boy. (audience laughs) (buzzer blaring) - Thank you! Took you long enough. - Come on.
- You dancin'? - Woo!
- And the award goes to Beyonce. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience cheering drowns out speech) - Oh. Woo! - Let's go! - "Wild N' Out," say my name. - [Audience] Beyonce! - Listen, I would like to accept this award from The Academy for the Better Than All
the Baddest Bitches Award. I would like to thank my mother for givin' me this snatched skin and hair. To my husband for bein' so damn fertile. (audience laughs) And to just my range. I would like to thank my
range because (vocalizing). (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Woo! Remember that. And before I leave, Nick Cannon, I hope you're havin' fun
with Moroccan and 'Roe because my twins will
always be better than yours. (audience laughs)
(audience cheering) (bell dinging) - Who won? This is crazy.
- I'ma tell you who won. The Black Team won. Make some noise for the Black Team! (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) And the winner is Usher. (audience laughs) βͺ Oh no, no, no, no βͺ - That's the noise I make when I pee. (audience laughs) I wanna thank y'all for
this Let It Burn Award. (audience laughs) I wanna thank my sponsors
Vegan Life and Sushi 'cause we go raw all day. (audience laughs) And I just wanna, you
know what I'm sayin'? Shout out to my fans for supportin' me 'cause whatever the media says, y'all can not herpes. I mean hurt me! (audience laughs) Thank you, thank you. (bell dings)
(audience cheering) - And the winner is Tyrese. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Yo, hey, calm down, calm down. I just wanna accept this
award for the Real Men Cry. I just wanna say thank you to everybody, but I just wanna address Nick Cannon. I just want (voice breaking)... I just want you to stop playin' the cast of "Wild N' Out" without me. I mean, they work so hard. I mean, I work... What more do you want from me? (buzzer blaring)
(audience laughs) (rapper imitates crying) - They shoulda played the music, that damn speech was so long. (audience laughs) (rapper imitates crying) (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) - And the winner is Wendy Williams. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (audience laughs) - First of all, I wanna
say, how you doin'? (audience laughs) I wanna thank everybody for nominating me for this Fall for Nothin' Award because I just wanna let everybody... (audience laughs)
(audience cheering) (bell dings) (audience laughs) - And the winner is Peter Griffin. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Thank you, baby. Well, I just wanna say thank you to everybody out here (laughs). Cleveland, would you
like to say somethin'? Loretta, when I get home
baby, we're gonna have a... We're gonna have... We will not have sex. Listen (laughs). (bell dings) Hold on (groans). - And the winner is Colin Kaepernick. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Go, Nick go!
- Here we go. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) (bell dings) - And the winner is
Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - If you smell... (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) I wanna thank you guys for
the Secure the Bag Award. This is- (man in blue jeans vocalizing) - It's your fault. - Listen-
- It's your fault! - It's not my fault! - If you woulda just not
done the movie I'd be okay. - What's your name? It doesn't matter what's your name! (audience laughs)
(audience applauding) (bell dinging) - DJ D-Wrek, who won? - Gotta give that to the Red Squad. Make some noise for the Red Squad, y'all. And the award goes to City Girls. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - JT, JT, JT, I got the award. I got the award bitch, finally, ah! I'll call you back, bitch. Tell cellmate I say hello. Hey, cellmate! Okay, okay, hold on. Okay, I thank y'all for
the Lonely Bitch Award. I'm out here alone. JT, eh, ho, bitch, come home. I miss you much, I really do. I've been sellin' out all these shows and everybody keeps sayin', "Where's City Girls?" I might just drop this 'cause
the only City Girl right here. I guess she got act up and she got snatched up but the po-pos. JT, this for you. I love you! Thank you. (audience cheering)
(bell dinging) - And the award goes to Jussie Smollett. (audience cheering) - Oh! Oh, okay. Ah, ah! Ah! (rapper laughs) (audience laughs)
(audience cheering) I wanna thank y'all for the See Right What Happened Was Award. (audience laughs) So many people I wanna thank (sighs). Oh, I wanna thank Lee Daniels. Through it all he never
turned his back on me. Not once. Not even when I asked him to. He never turned his back on me. Not once. And last but not least,
remember Jamal Lyon. "It's not who I am, it's what I do." Shout out to Nigeria! (bell dinging)
(audience cheering) - And the award goes to Ariana Grande. (audience cheering) (audience laughs) - Yo, this is dope. Okay, I wanna say thank you for givin' me the I
Forgot I Was White Award. (laughs) It's so easy, 'cause
like this (beep) is dope. And like it's so cool. I can't believe I'm here with
"Wild N' Out" with my people. This is like, so, so cool, so I just wanna thank Mariah Carey for doin' what you do and then lettin' me steal it and make it worse. And you know, like (vocalizing). And one more thing. I wanna say that God is a woman, specifically a black
woman, specifically me. Thank y'all, thank y'all. Thank you. - Okay, daddy. And the award goes to Katt Williams. - Don't talk about my friend. (audience cheering) There never been a (beep) in the history of (beep)-dom to get an award for
doin' absolutely nothin'. But today is the day. I don't know what day it is, but it's probably the Friday after next. Now, the last time you seen me I got my ass whooped by an
eighth grader, but guess what? I'm back with nine lives. That's why they call
me Katt mother (beep). (audience laughs)
(audience cheering) - Okay, cous. Okay, cous. Okay, cous. - And the award goes to MTV. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - I wanna thank MTV for givin' us this Treat "Wild N' Out"
Like A Stepchild Award. Listen, man, this is ridiculousness-ness. I don't understand how y'all got us doin' work for an award show that we don't even get to come to. It don't make no sense. I mean the last time they gave us tickets to the VMAs we were
sittin' in a Jersey Shore. (audience laughs) We the real reason people watch MTV. The rest of them shows is catfish. (audience laughs) Let me tell you somethin'. What, what, what, what you gotta be, "16 and Pregnant" to get
some good seats to the VMAs? I mean, Vic not pregnant. He ain't 16, but he's pregnant. Look, do y'all think we should get some good seats to the VMAs? - [Audience] Yeah! - Well, make some noise. Watch then, God damn it. - Front Row Chico. We gon' call you Front Row Chico. (bell dinging) (buzzer blaring) - DJ, who own this? - I gotta give it to the Red Squad. Make some noise for 'em. (audience cheering)
(audience applauding) - Yeah, we gon' be a'ight. Everybody out there, throw
some noise for Johnny D., and D-Wrek take us out.
