When Were You Almost Killed?

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have you ever almost been killed this happened in the immediate aftermath of Hurricane Katrina within a few days and was the most terrifying moment of my life that me and my sister are still alive and with our family is amazing my sister and I were throwing a baseball in the front yard when my sister threw it badly and I had to go chase it well where I was going to get the ball I could see her but a truck pulled up and I'm assuming couldn't see me then a man jumped out grabbed my sister and jumped back into the truck unbeknownst to me my dad also saw but I took off running after the truck I was only 15 at the time but I played many sports and was quite athletic and for whatever reason the truck stopped at the end of the street just long enough for me to reach it and open the door I grabbed my sister who is fighting with the man in the front seat but in the process of pulling on her I pull him out too and we stopped fighting I tell my sister to run and she does but I can't get away from the man the driver walks around and tells me I've made a huge mistake and points a gun right in my face all of a sudden I hear my dad bellow drop it or I'll kill you both with his shotgun aimed at the guy's chest but the guy I'm wrestling with let's go and jumps in the truck but the other guy was not so lucky he rounded the truck with a gun still in his hand and my dad shot my dad says he barely nicked him just to get the point across with the man screamed dropped the gun jumped in the truck and took off as he drove off dad shot a truck so cops could identify it easier there was a significant amount of blood where the guy had been shot also just to give you an idea of what things are like when the government is broken we called the cops and after hearing that we were okay they told us sorry but they had bigger things to deal with a TL DR my sister was almost kidnapped I pulled her out of the truck that got a gun pulled on me dad shot guy who pulled gun on me we ended up okay it was after Katrina and the police were too busy to respond after we called background back when I was in sixth grade I was unfortunate enough to get Burkitt's lymphoma chemo is the usual treatment and along with that part of the chemo is to get spinal taps to protect and test the spinal cord it is important to that I was also a freakishly large sixth grader and just under six feet tall and over 200 pounds so the events went down like this on a particular spinal tap they were giving me I was resisting the anesthesia they had given me I attribute this to me being huge in the Children's Hospital just not having to deal with kids this large usually and they had to up the dosage not a problem I got knocked out fine and the procedure went as planned fast forward to the next time I needed to get one before they put me under the doctor had mentioned that it was her first time doing one solo and that she was really excited hello she read my chart pumped me full of anesthesia and did the procedure the problem is this when the doctor looked at how much knockout juice they gave me the last time she looked at the total amount they gave me and gave it to me at once instead of spread out over the hour or however long the first tap went the next thing I remember is being very groggy and just wanting to go back to sleep with the nurse doctor now sobbing anesthesiologists and my mom were all trying to get me to stay awake I was pee and just wanted to take a nap but they were having none of it I found out later that my heart slowed were a i-i-i-i down my blood pressure dropped significantly and apparently I was about as close to dead as you can get without being dead the doctor apologized over and over to both me and my mother and that's how I got unlimited ice cream at the hospital TL DR rookie doctor drugs 12 year old and almost kills him ice cream and tears ensue dang that sucks my aunt was killed by a rookie doctor who didn't read his chart thoroughly enough and missed that she was allergic to some painkiller and she died in her sleep from her throats closing the doctor was a freaking train wreck afterwards he was sobbing in a breakout room when the head dude found him not a very fun trip to Oregon that week a couple of winters ago I went out drinking with my room mates and all night afterwards I felt like absolute crap headache vomiting sweating profusely extremely disoriented with auditory hallucinations in my confused state I'd figured it was just the alcohol or food poisoning or something in the morning I discovered that the same thing happened to everybody else in the house turns out that chimney for our heater had gotten clogged and was leaking carbon monoxide into the house all night while we slept the maximum safe ppm for Co is something like 24 ppm I ran out and got a detector and it immediately started chirping with a readout of over 800 ppm the gas works guys wouldn't even step back into the house after they took their reading and according to them we probably shouldn't have lived through the night and would definitely all be dead if we'd spent another few hours in the house moral of the story by adding carbon monoxide detector if you don't already have one man alive there are men alive in here Afghanistan homemade explosive went off under our striker I'm told it was approximately two hundred pounds of the stuff my squad leader sitting in the seat next to me is killed by the blast two others lose both legs guy across from me has bones in all of his limbs and several vertebrae broken the person who was killed had traded spots with me so he could take a pee not a few minutes before the explosion I'm still dealing with the guilt although one of my feet got jacked up pretty good in the army as kicking me out because of it I still feel like I have no place to complain and I try to live my life more fully and be a better person in honor of the man who died instead of me TL DR ie d1 February day 10 years ago a younger eleven years old and nerdy of attrition of me was walking home from school together with a few classmates the temperature had been around zero degrees Celsius for the last week some days above resulting in thawing of the still thick layer of snow and some days right below refreezing the water creating extremely slippery roads as we were walking uphill happy that the school was over for the day some of the cooler kids started to throw snowballs at each other suddenly they decided to all gang up on the smallest amongst the group me as the snowballs flew towards me through the air I flinched and took a step backwards slipped on a spot of ice and fell out on the road as I spin around 180 degrees in midair I can see the old Volvo just a few metres from me heading in my direction downhill on an icy road as I fall on my stomach and close my eyes in fear of what I think will be my death I can hear the brakes screeching and my classmate screaming and suddenly I feel something bump into my backpack and pushes a foot downhill after a moment of complete silence me thinking I was dead I finally realize I wasn't and I dared to open my eyes all I see is the dark rubber other wheel inches away from my face my backpack or rather the amount of school books in my backpack saved me by getting hit neither front of the car with enough force to push me to safety leaving my head intact without those extra five inches on my back my brain would have ended up as a puddle of red jello on the road and thanks to the old man in the car slowing down to 5 mph when passing playing schoolchildren being fast enough on the brakes and having put on brand-new winter tyres for the season TL DR do your homework kids it might save your life given how horrible school backpack loads can get I'm surprised a Volvo didn't crumple on impact got stung by a jellyfish when I was a kid without medical attention I would have died Australia's into peaceful place medical attention is Aussie slang for getting peed on when I was visiting India at the age of 7 or something three trucks ran over the motor rickshaw me and my family were in but the driver died my aunt's arm got messed up really bad my toe was bleeding but surprisingly no one else got hurt the trucks did not stop they obviously just wanted us out of the way running people over was their solution I remember it very distinctly because I landed on my butt facing the trucks and one of them ran over my toe if I landed a couple inches closer to the trucks I don't even want to think about it I was technically dead for a while don't even know how long though I was never pronounced dead by a doc by the time a doc saw me the Coast Guard had revived me I've posted the story before but it seems fitting so I'll throw it in here again was windsurfing at a local competition out of my league in really cold water without the right wetsuits and overpowered I'd rigged up a sail way too big for the wind speeds we were seeing was way off to the side out of view practicing tried a move I'd never pull it off before and took my mast to the side of the head knocking me out cold I was wearing a life jacket I usually don't but this comp required them needless to say now I rarely go out without one anyway long story short remember coming to didn't know how long I'd been out but I was severely hypothermic tried swimming to shore but was too far out and blacked out again from the cold this time another competitor came across my drifting rig knew it was bad and went straight ashore to tell the organizers they in turn tell the coast guard who eventually pulled me out of the water by then I didn't have a pulse they start CPR and thankfully had a Deb gave me this happened now I get to tell the story about how my own stupidity actually killed me don't know if it's related but after the Zap I developed an interesting spiral pattern in my chest hair that I still have now probably not related but I like to think it is as for the whole life thing didn't see anything just felt really tired and felt myself slipping away a best analogy I can think of is one of those really boring long lectures for a class you didn't even like when you were hungover you really don't want to fall asleep but no matter how hard you fight it you just keep fading into slumber there's no death until it's warm and dead cold water has saved a ridiculous number of rescued drowning people as for the spiral pattern that is common in certain electrocutions I was driving home from working a 12-hour shift in the middle of February and during the overnight it had snowed enough to where it was slippery but not absolutely dangerous I was being careful but even more so as my car was only a few months old heading down 95 south in the passing lane I see a tractor-trailer up ahead and I'm not sure if it's moving or not because of the snow I then catch the glimpse of a few warning triangles staggered out behind it and realized that the truck isn't going anywhere so I transition to the travel lane to go by it I happen to glance in my rearview mirror and see a monster off a book bearing down behind me having switched lanes as he too realizes the truck ahead isn't moving bullet time as he slams into the back of my car and I'm acutely aware of glass flying around me like snowflakes as his car begins to push me towards the side of the trailer's cargo hold I know this because I am seeing that metal foot thing that they put down when they detach the cargo part coming slowly towards me you don't have time to panic even though things are moving slowly you don't even have the wherewithal to go oh well here comes death but the body has an amazing survival instinct under the back end of the truck I am pushed and the top of my car begins to peel back like a sardine can as the roof is sheared off by the big rigs back-end next thing I remember I'm sitting in my brand new car unintentionally hunched down with the roof missing looking up at the underbelly of the truck my hat which was on my head had been knocked off and thrown back into the road behind us I had just ducked enough as to where it was my hat and not my head I don't feel so bad when my reflexes aren't good saying Co D or M W when it counts I get it done update for all the backseat drivers which is impressive as since it got pushed in and you all still fit back there I was in the passing lane on the two-lane highway the truck had stopped up ahead in the passing lane as well I checked my mirrors before moving into the travel lane to go past the stopped truck boot that was in the passing lane realized the truck had stopped too late came into the travel lane as well he was going nearly 20 miles above the speed limit a day when you should be going 5 to 10 less than the posted limit he was cited and he lost the corresponding court case decisively Nyonya almost killed by a truck scary insurance claim on your new car horrifying went out to eat with some friends get back all fine and dandy other friend calls from right near where we were two terrorists blew themselves up killing 11 people one time I was almost kidnapped which I'm sure would have ended in murder I was living in Bridgeport in an area where there was a lot of construction going on the stretch of street I walked every day was pretty desolate for a city bid for the most part busy with pedestrian traffic well this one day I'm walking back from the train to my apartment and I notice a van is driving slowly I start to speed up and I hear a window rolled down the guy in the van yells out to me Karen get in the van my name is definitely not Karen and I was not about to get in the van so I booked it fast the guy in the van speeds up and he is yelling Karen get in the van don't make a me come out there and get you Karen and I'm like my name isn't Karen foogoo and I run into the nearest neighborhood the guy turns to follow me and I'm just weaving in between houses freaking the freak out for whatever reason there is no one outside for once and the entire time I lived in that neighborhood and no one will answer their door this whole time I'm trying to call the cops on my phone while running like a goddamn idiot and I am so shaken I can't even dial because this guy is driving up and down the streets of this neighborhood looking for my but I ended up hiding in someone's bushes for 15 minutes until he finally drove away I notified the cops of the shady behavior and maybe I overreacted but frake I was scared TL DR almost kidnapped by a dude in a van I don't think you overreacted not sure of whether I was going to be murdered or debauched probably murdered considering I am a guy a few years ago I decided to walk home from a joint 18th birthday party to avoid the taxi fare as I was a broke high school student I estimated the time to walk home to be about 20 minutes in which I hoped would help me sober up 15 minutes and I finally reached my street my street to this day still very poorly lit even under the already few streetlights as it difficult to check your watch I quickly glanced at my phone to check the time just so I could guesstimate how long it would take before I would be reunited with my glorious bed as I look back up I see a tinge of orange light slowly moving I guess while inebriated I found this light mildly fascinating so I was fixated on it for a short period before I knew it I came upon the source which happened to be a very tall and lanky topless junkie smoking a cigarette my heart jumps but I suppress all physical reactions to the best of my ability and carry on a few seconds later I can't help but think about what I just saw this extremely scummy looking guy is standing around topless at 3:30 a.m. in the freaking middle of winter doing scat all alarm bells start ringing so I turn around and hope to see him still in the same spot using my peripheral vision he was gone I start to panic and pick up my walking pace hoping that he actually lived in that area and had returned home I turned my head again to see him across the road from me walking in the same direction thousands of different scenarios starts to play out in my mind 99% of them telling me to run I turn my head slightly to use my peripherals again I catch him crossing the street towards me so I decide to Usain Bolt the freak out of there after running a good 100 meters I turn around to see him 20 meters behind me he was chasing me I finally reached my house after another good 100 meters run into my driveway into the back of my house I stop and turn around to see that he was no longer there and stood there out of breath laughing in relief TL DR got a gold medal in the 200 meter ghetto sprint and the junkie never found out what both of you were running from one of many close encounters I was sitting on something on the top of an apartment building on the northern edge of Fallujah on November 9 2004 it was a brisk morning and I was trying to dry out from the pouring rain we had that night I was a boot so my poncho went to cover the machine again and I got to get soaked all night on watch anyway I was smoking a cigarette with my helmet off there was a large metal container that the locals used for water reservoirs for their sinks and whatever else and that was directly behind me I was maybe halfway through my cigarette when I hear a loud bang like something hitting metal I look over to see a hole in the reservoir that was maybe a foot at the most from my head I calmly got up from whatever I was sitting on and moved behind a brick wall to finish my cigarette whatever you do Hank don't light a cigarette a good sniper can see a hot cherry for miles I was driving at about 11 p.m. with two exchange students home from Japan after a day at Cedar Point which is this killer rollercoaster theme park in Ohio the easiest route home is by using two-lane roads that go through all these small rural areas although it's boring not late but at least there's no traffic as we were driving home I looked ahead and saw a truck then I saw two lights heading towards me like someone was passing the truck I did a double-take and notice the passing driver was coming right at me I tried to slam on the brakes as fast as I could and stayed on the road the other driver swerved off but corrected himself to stay on the road hitting the passenger side head-on the rep killed my passenger not more than a foot away from me she was actually brain dead like the scene left the girl in the backseat with back injuries needed surgery twice and I had a few large cuts from the wreck the girls weren't so great at English at the time so I was trying to stay as calm as I could trying to translate for the paramedics I spent the night in the hospital with my parents who were awesome enough to drive up in the late hours to make me feel comfortable after seeing someone go brain-dead not more than a couple feet away was really messed up I really appreciate learning another Mariza just being alive and in good health from the accident and the other girl was okay after two surgeries and is getting married next month I'm not entirely how sure how close this is to near-death but I did once in second grade have to deal with my tonsils being buttholes and they had swollen to a size so large that I could barely breathe and seemed to progressively get bigger through the day I went to school felt a little strange but I hardly noticed it at all felt a little bit better but was kind of tired around recess time my teacher she's awesome was like hey Sarah don't go to recess I want to ask you something of course my little kid senses were tingling and I immediately thought I was going to get in trouble I hadn't done anything wrong so I was more worried about the false blame than anything actually serious much to my surprise everyone left for recess and she asked me if I was feeling okay I said that I felt fine she knew me well enough because that was my third year with her same teacher for seven years over the course of my elementary middle school career and decided to call my grandparents plus mom anyways she calls mom comes to get me at school she told my mom that I wasn't acting like I normally was I seemed lethargic and like something was wrong mom brings me to my grandparents I want to lay down so they put me on the bed but didn't let me go to sleep I didn't understand why then I definitely do now as much as I wanted to this next part is a blur because I honestly don't remember what happened I think I went to the ER for immediate relief but I also could have gotten a rush appointment with my physician whatever happened I discovered that my tonsils had swollen to the point of freaking throat apocalypse and I semi easily could have died of asphyxiation of it had taken much longer or if my teacher hadn't noticed because I surely didn't notice that I was sick it was weird I just felt like typing that all out haha it's good at your teachers care about you like that you are very lucky when I was about five or six I shared a bunk bed with my brother I usually slept on the top built on this particular night I decided to sleep on the bottom not thirty minutes later I hear a crash and feel wooden boards pounding my small body into the mattress the wooden beams which kept the top bunk intact fell right across my throat and chest blocking my airway my brother began screaming for my parents and attempted lifting the bed sure enough adrenaline kicked in and he lifted the bed frame just high enough for me to crawl out I was fine other than some cuts and bruises my brother got the top bunk - ours was metal and the welding at one corner came apart my dad's quick fix was using a belt to keep it together every night I would stare cautiously at that corner until I fall asleep two stories both involve me being stupid one I was in the Dominican Republic in a small village walking distance from Haiti helping out a missionary building things fixing stuff distributing clothes getting people out of flooded areas etc there was a cement underground system near one of their houses it was very deep and had about two feet of stagnant water at the bottom the opening was at ground level covered by a piece of plywood when I first arrived someone even pointed it out to me as dangerous about a week and a half later I was backing away from something I don't even remember what and suddenly I was falling I had stepped on the plywood and it had collapsed into the system I managed to grab the edge with one arm screwed up my shoulder but it was smooth concrete and I was slipping everyone who saw it reacted very fast and pulled me out - one time I was installing network equipment in a wiring closet that her contractor had set up I don't know exactly what they did wrong but I guess they had grounded one of the racks incorrectly at one point during the install I had my hands on both racks at once and suddenly realized I could not let go lights flickered ups beeped I managed to fall backwards I didn't think that much of it at the time and just finished up the repair not touching two racks at the same time my coworker later told me it was dangerous to have electricity going from armed one because it could screw up your heart TL DR fell in a pit got zapped also been struck by lightning and in a really nasty car crash not at the same time when I was six years old I was fishing at a dam with my father well one way or another I fell in the water and headed rapidly towards electric lines they used to keep fish from doing whatever and my dad leaped in and grabbed me just in time that was fun when I was 16 my friends and I lived in a small town big MT country roads well we bought the fastest cars we could afford and joy Road there's been a few accidents that were scary if the worst was taking a 90-degree turn at 80 miles per hour and sliding sideways through a cornfield for 50 yards or so with corn flying through the car as the windows were down naturally when we finally stopped we got out and took inventory three people one seat belt on amongst us all okay then we turn around and notice we stopped about ten feet from a big boulder about 4x the size of the Daytona felt very mortal that night New Year's Eve 2005 22 years old party with all my closest friends drank quite a hefty amount of Jack Daniel's in a series of drinking games which apparently I was not doing well anyway woke up hungover drove home to go back to bed woke up around 1:00 p.m. on New Year's Day got some coffee and ate some food couple hours later I go take a shower everything is cool until I get out to dry off I reach for the towel here a snap in my head and my left arm goes totally limp just rubbery and non-responsive but quickly recovered I chalked it up to low blood sugar or something at first so I go upstairs and put clothes on singing along to a song on the stereo I notice in my mirror that half my face is slumped I'm having a stroke five days in the hospital which luckily is very near my house at a time and a bit of therapy and I am 100% normal awesomely enough I reach for the towel here a snap in my head this made me freaking cringe a person in the lab next to mine almost caused a biological accident that would have killed all of us in the building that day a risk of working on viruses I accidentally the human race I was held up at knifepoint by a man who seemed to be mentally ill wasn't sure what he was going to in college during my last three years I lived in the ghetto of Boston as it was right next door to my campus Roxbury for those of you who are familiar with the area I was heading to the local liquor store with a friend of mine which is in the midst of the ghetto as we were walking back this 10 year kid ran by us and for some reason my friend went is he running a marathon or something there were these three people behind us and one of them apparently got annoyed with the comments for whatever reason and goes I'm going to flip I'm like Hurricane Katrina right now he pulls out a knife on us and tells us to keep walking and shut up or he's going to kill us I saw his eyes and he looked like he was either freaked up beyond belief or freaking batshit crazy or both my friend talks back and goes I'm not going to say a thing we had no idea what was going on but we eventually approached a main road and jetted out of there they didn't go after us very weird but scary incident played with hammer and bucket as a kid back end of the hammer went into my eye doctor said it was close to my brain but I am NOT blind so as all good my eye instinctively closed for a few seconds after reading this I got stuck in a fold-up couch once it was scary and embarrassing needing parental help to get out twice both involving explosions first it was about four years ago I was at a friend's bonfire everything was cool we were just drinking and having a good time someone dumped a bunch of leaves on the fire and in doing so didn't notice dropping a spray-paint cannon as well I was sitting pretty close to it when the whole thing just exploded I blacked out for a few moments and can only remember hearing it it took me a second to realize what had happened after I came back to I ended up with a flash burn over my entire face my lips were blistered and my right forearm was covered in second-degree burns from when I instinctively brought it up to protect myself but luckily I only ended up with one scar on my right wrist from the largest second-degree burn and can laugh about the whole thing now I was looking toasty for a couple weeks though second time was about a year ago I was late for work driving down the freeway as I get close to my exit I notice a giant plume of smoke ahead as I get to my exit I notice that the smoke is coming from the underpass below I exit and look to my left where I would normally go there is a tanker truck completely flipped upside down and the entire underpass was on fire at least it looked like it the truck had gone off the freeway and fell into the intersection below it if I would have been one two minutes early I would have been right under the truck when it fell once crossing a desert and running out of water due to a puncture in the water container stupid camel another time falling off a cliff and somehow grabbing on to some grass that I hadn't seen close to blacking out scuba diving after getting separated from group and running out of air my stupidity and a very dumb dive buddy terrible car crash but escaped with a cut to my head only enough for now I suppose Mr Bond it is a pleasure to meet you I was almost ran over by a car as a kid I used to live in a very small town in France and I used to ride my bicycle a bit everywhere around the place go to my basketball training go see my family I used to ride my sister's very rusty old BMX bike which tires were completely slick and also brakes were not working so well anymore but hey it is not like there was much traffic around where I lived and I learned to safely anticipate way before every intersections one day I caught a flat tire and since I could repair it right away I asked to use my sister's brand-new all-terrain bike with brand-new shiny powerful brakes I learned not to brake too hard the hard way went over the handlebar a few days later when my father fixed my flat tire I went back for a ride on my good old BMX unless it's time I completely forgot that my brakes were as efficient as rubbing butter on the tires so I was riding full speed on a farm rode and came across a blind intersection with a road and I hear this car coming in the distance I got struck with horror and realized the following even though I was still far away I knew that I could never manage to stop in time with these crappy brakes I braked as hard as I could a goddess she'd have got a knock Lisa Nablus estart tires screeched I closed my eyes and hoped for the best the car stopped inches away from me and I'll never forget the look on the drivers face he couldn't even articulate anything he just stared at me from his windows as if he saw death as I Baca faced and casually continued riding my bike down my street I've never told anyone about it it is only a few years later that I realized how close I was to being ran over TL DR little me decided to not slow down on my crappy BMX while coming across a blind intersection I was stupid once and pulled my front brake really hard while speeding down a hill learned the hard way that this results in flipping over the handlebars and scratching half the skin off my arm numerous times war is hack my brother is getting deployed next month so this comment scares the ever living crap out of me I fell off a 34-foot balcony I was fine after six weeks one and a half heck almost two years ago my then-boyfriend became a Sikh head he sold all my things for crack and when I found out obviously I was mad and I was going to pack up the little what I had left and leave he started yelling at me he called his mother to have her talk me into not leaving when he heard me tell her that I had enough he started to physically assault me I still had his phone and begged his mother to call the cops that about Christian she was she refused to do so she sat there and listened to my cry and beg for help as he beat the crap out of me pinning me down punching me I managed to wiggle out from under him and run to phone to call 9-1-1 I managed to tell the operator the address before he took my phone and threw it against the wall he then grabbed a kitchen knife and stabbed me in the side and proceeded to keep wailing on me I really don't remember much after being stabbed next thing I knew I woke up in the hospital the doctors said I was lucky that the knife didn't seriously injure my organs when I read the police report it said the cops came into my ex still beating me if the police didn't come when they did I probably would be dead a number of years ago I was on a cruise ship in Greece on a school trip when the captain unexpectedly ran the ship into the crags of an island as we were pulling in I was on the bottom floor of the ship when it happened I looked outside my room to see water spilling in by the hundreds of gallons from everywhere around me crap was ridiculous two people in the room next to me died I hold but up the ship's tears luckily we were close enough to show that a ton of lifeboats came and rescued us yes several times two motorcycle accidents three automobile accidents one near drowning one merciless beating while being robbed each time I could have easily been killed here's the best part I've not broken any bones ever in my life I was about 14 and was fishing in a river with some friends I was sitting on top of the train trestle about 50 feet off the water my smarter friends were on the banks below I grew up close to railroad tracks so the sounds of trains were not alarming to me a train is coming down the tracks and I'm not moving a friend below says BOHICA you gonna get off the tracks I looked up and saw tge train about 600 yards away so I started to pack up my tackle box this train trestle was one track wide had no side rails and has about a six inch gap between each railroad tie if you don't step on the board's you would fall through and probably break your leg so you have to be careful walking up there so back to the story I'm gathering my things I start to reel in my line I look over and realize that the Train is moving way faster than I thought at this point the train was about 100 feet from the bridge I'm on and closing quickly I realize I don't have time to reel in my line so I start running I'm chopping my feet knowing that if I trip I'm I had to run about 50 - 75 feet I was terrified the train was blowing its horn the bridge was shaking I remember having this feeling of shock over how huge and powerful this thing was I knew it was getting close so I jumped from the bridge at about a 45-degree angle there is a concrete wall that each end of the bridge that led down to the water I jumped over the 50-foot drop to the bank below luckily over the little concrete wall and slip down this hill of rocks the train passed before I hit the ground so it was very close my friends below saw the whole thing but since they were down in the river they couldn't see if I had made it or not they were yelling for me but I could barely hear them because of the train the train was pretty long but none of them started the climb up to check on me because they weren't sure if I had made it and they didn't want to see me splattered so they stayed put and yelled for me once the train had passed I responded to them and they came up to check on me as a footnote I was fishing off the right side of the bridge and I jumped off of the left side which means I pulled my fishing line over the tracks when I reeled in my line it was smashed off the line was about an inch wide kinda crazy before I was born and when my big brother was only a toddler my dad was pushing him abouts in his push chair next to a cliff my dad was pretending to push him over the edge and my brother was laughing away two minutes later - my dad's horror my brother gets out of his push chair and runs about he hadn't been strapped in that whole time and had only been holding on to the push chair when my dad was tipping him over the edge if he let go he'd have been a goner ha ha oh wow I bet he slept on the couch for a while got my head stuck in a crib as a baby they weren't going to check on my for another five minutes but they did grandfather apparently literally ripped apart cribs so I didn't choke to death grandpa used best strength on crib it's super effective about ten years ago while I was living in Guam we were in the middle of a typhoon my upstairs window was leaking water and my father tells me to go up a sweep up the water so there I am right in front of the window and sweeping up the water for some reason I move away from the window and not one second later the window implodes my dad screams and runs upstairs I'm in shock and there's glass everywhere some had enough force to be embedded in my couch to this day I believe that if I was standing in front of that window I would not be here typing this today when I was four I was hit by a van while crossing the road on a very rural street but he was going fast enough and quietly enough that little me didn't know there was a van coming my head took out the headlight on the right side and I did a lot of damage to the rest of the front side of the car I guess I was pulled under and one of the tires ran over my right leg leaving a lot of scratches I am told that I was asking for my blankie I woke up in the hospital later that night while beings raid other than the concussion I didn't have any broken bones or any other problems but I also scared the crap out of my mom who was pregnant and she had gone into labor that night but the next day all was good and I had a new brother I fell asleep after a night of smoking and drinking in a ghetto bass studio I rented with a friend yes studio we both traveled and were rarely home at the same time I woke up with my eyes bugging out of my head and I wasn't able to breathe something was lodged in my throat in a moment of panic I reached into my mouth to feel what was lodged in there and realized that my uvula not vulva had swollen up to the size of a golf ball the only way for me to breathe was to lean forward and use my finger to keep it from blocking my airway I got up and walked about two blocks to a hospital looking like a madman with my fingers in my mouth hacking and gagging the whole way go ahead and touch your uvula and see what happens I had to write - no - the nurse at the desk they immediately sat me down and a doctor came in with a spray can they fired this into my mouth and the swelling went down within minutes I even made my flight to Boston a couple hours later turns out a spider had crawled into my mouth and bit my uvula TL DR read the last line nope chloride poisoning in the pool I was asleep in coma or something for a week fell while cycling car drove at 40-plus km/h by about 10 centimeters from my head when I was on the ground by almost skied off a cliff as a child apparently did I hit a pile of snow before I went over it can't remember anything from it got hit in the head with a gun during a mugging the gun went off when he hit me I was in the Air Force working on f-15 seize my jobless flight controls an instrument specialist one day I am working on a fuel indication problem I am on top of the jet about 10-15 feet off the ground with panels removed and test equipment and tools all around me the Jets are parked in rows three deep nose to tail and about 100 plus feet in between me and the next jet in front of me I am working minding my own business and the jet in front of me starts up for an engine run ops check no big deal there is plenty of space as long as they stay at idle at a time they are supposed to be above idle they usually do the engine run in a harsh house building to contain the sound after about 20 minutes I see the crew chiefs getting ready to shut down this is where I almost get killed normally they run the engines up a little before shutdown I don't remember why something to do with fuel entrapment or something sometimes you get a crew chief at wants to show off and take it a little past what is safe I look up when this happens to see the exhaust nozzles closing and then igniting the idiot has pushed it past 80% and gone into burner on the flight line I grab the lip of the panel hole in front of me and hold on the two feet by two feet metal panel in front of me lifts off and passes right where my head was just a second before and proceeds to hit the left horizontal stabber later if I would have fallen off it would have been backwards and headfirst into concrete needless to say I had a few words with the crew chief who was running that jet and he got his run certification taken away TLDR almost got killed by other people's stupidity I was once trying to get a cell phone signal at my friend's house out in the middle of the country so we decided to go up the hill to try and get a better signal we drove up the hill and were waiting around for a bit trying to get a signal out of freaking nowhere this M head comes shooting at us with a revolver telling us to get out of his property even though we were on the road and not his property and we drove straight the heck out of there while he fired about three or four shots at our car one when I was seven or eight I was coloring pictures in the car had the cap of the paint marker in my mouth my father had to break and it shot down my throat almost choking me the hospital had to take it out cause it was in the top of my left lung to about eight years ago someone started over taking on a busy road hit my car frontally both doing between 90 and 100 km/h he died in the crash I survived but it was on the edge took me over two years to recover and left me with a handicapped knee when I was seven I almost choked on a starlight mint I chalked on a jelly bean when I was very little my mother grabbed me and hung me upside down by my ankles and shaked me over the kitchen sink until I coughed it up it was a little rough but I survived I was around fifteen when I visited an ancestral family home that was overseen by some family friend it was my first time there and he was giving me and my family a to of the house and garden I was walking on what looked like dried mud when I feel the earth shake and I lose balance I was fast sinking into this mud and I went about waist-deep when I shouted for this guy who helped me out before I drowned turns out it was not mud and cow crap rather and I had been walking over a reservoir for a go by gas plant dry weather made the surface look like it was earth dried after rain TL DR sank waist-deep into cow [ __ ] stepping over my gas plant I was driving my car and I see two of my friends on the side of the road I rolled down my window and screamed at them to get their attention while I wasn't paying attention to the road I swerved to the left when I look forward again I was about feet from getting into a head-on collision with crap in my pants I swerve the freak out of the way and start hating myself if I did get in that collision me and my brother would have surely died I Drive a fox wagon Vanagon and I would have seriously injured the other passengers my friends half scold me and half make fun of me every time they bring it up TL DR I almost get myself into a head-on collision yelling out the window while driving I was driving in the fast lane of the highway once at around 2:00 in the morning there was construction to the left of me so the soft shoulder was about a foot in width in the lane to my right was a tractor trailer just ahead of me just as I started passing him I was doing about 110 K and he was doing about 100 I noticed him start to come over and then signal he didn't see me beside him obviously and I hammered my horn and Gandhi engine getting up to around 140 when I finally got in front of him I was pushed over to the soft shoulder to the point that I was only an insurer so from losing my driver's side mirror and thankfully got out in front of him in time he did a mini fishtail when he saw me pop out and I figure that he might have been driving tired I was thankful that my car a 92 Sunbird GT had the guts enough to get me out of there in a hurry or I surely would have been killed one lucky Christmas my parents bought me an introduction to racing course at Skip Barber at Laguna Seca the course works by separating the students into a fast group and a slow group I made it into the fast group along with another guy my age 19 at the time we basically spend a few hours lapping the track behind the instructor switching positions each lap we follow very closely when possible I was third in line when the guy in front of me clipped a corner before the red white curbs began must have been windy because the dirt that is normally there was blown away creating a six-inch cement wall where the curb began this instantly ripped off his front left wheel launching his car into the air end over end about 15 feet in front of me I drove under his car while it somersaulted across the track drove under his car settled on the outside of a corner with the front half of the car gone besides the cockpit frame I immediately pulled over to make sure he was alive helped him out and we sat and talked about how amazing the day was while we waited for the track tow truck to arrive yes he did have to pay for the racecar but his father drove a Lamborghini so I assume it wasn't a big deal TL DR drove under a flying racecar if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music]
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Channel: Internet Is Fun
Views: 16,380
Rating: 4.90625 out of 5
Keywords: #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, emkay, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub, askreddit school, r/askreddit how to, close call, barely survived, almost got killed, lucky escape, escape
Id: ot-UqpHA_cA
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 46min 36sec (2796 seconds)
Published: Sat May 09 2020
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