What's The WORST Date You've Ever Been On? (/r/AskReddit) Reddit Stories

what's the worst date you've ever been on wasn't necessarily the date which was bad on its own but the fact that she hung out in my parking lot for two hours after she dropped me off in case I changed my mind about doing something after dinner back in college I was invited to an ice rink with a girl I liked and some of her friends I did not know how to ice skate and I did not pick it up very quickly but I wanted to try and impress her somehow well I hugged the wall the whole time and made a fool of myself the highlight was when I saw a flash of light as I fell in front of a group of people turns out I had fallen right at the moment someone took a picture so my failure was immortalized forever she took me back to my apartment and ended the relationship before it began on a lighter note the woman who is now my wife was at that ice rink on that night we didn't realize we were there the same time until a year or two into our relationship and she exclaimed you were that guy who couldn't ice skate yeah she didn't seem that into you he was more than three hours late and was texting me telling me that he was 20 minutes away for two of those hours as soon as he arrived he tried to tell me to leave the part of the venue dive bar I'd already paid into sir we could go where he wanted tried to start a fight with a friend I'd happened to run into and called my aunt who talked me into going out with him in the first place a cock-blocking [ __ ] I just walked away from him after that last one and we never spoke again , I waited so long because I liked the bands that were playing I wouldn't have stayed if I was sitting around doing nothing he got there just before the last band finished but I had about enough of him by then because he'd been telling me that he was on the train in the same place for two hours we don't live out in the middle of nowhere and he could have easily gotten a bus or tram the rest of the way in that time if there was a problem with the train he never gave me a proper excuse but I didn't really care at that point went on a blind date with a lady who wouldn't stop picking at her scats just made a pile out of them on the restaurant table I excused myself to use the washroom and when I came back my soup was there at the pile of scabs Lawson's no I didn't eat the soup guy told me he just recently got out of a long-term relationship so he wasn't looking for a commitment but asked me if he could be my maintenance man as he stroked his peepee through his jeans made plans with this guy I knew from a charity I was on the board with he takes me a chain Mexican restaurant I pull up a few minutes early but my dad flies a plane and was going to be flying overhead of the restaurant and I wanted to see him fly over at 8 o'clock sharp the guy calls me and tells me that I am late I try to explain the whole flyby thing he isn't having it we go inside and I try to order some food and he tells me that we are not getting food and that I can't eat then he starts going off on major political rants which I'm completely opposed to I asked him if this is all a joke or if he really as he is being serious I finally convinced him to at least get an appetizer I was not allowed to choose he got guacamole tableside but only had them put onions in the avocado I was planning my escape when he asked are you figuring out how you are going to leave yep thanks for the one domestic beer bye I went out with a guy that my roommate set me up with a few years ago first he was vocally irritated that I wore heels b/c it made him less taller than me note he was still taller than me by a few inches but just less TOA dinner went alright although we didn't have a whole lot in common after dinner we met back up with my roommate and her boyfriend and we all went to a house party of their friends I basically knew no one at the party my dates somewhat newly ex-girlfriend was there to summarize she called me a [ __ ] spilled my drink on me threatened to fight me told me she gave him her Peas left came back an hour later looking for me hugged me grabbed my ass and apologized and told me I was hot so I guess it went pretty well by the end of the night we spent most of the date going shopping for clothes for another date she had later that week it's kind of funny seeing as how she was the one that asked me out I went on a tinder date with a guy who is now in my contacts has done it and so a penis pic prior to the date he seemed normal we texted and talked on the phone then arranged to meet at a restaurant bar he was cute but definitely bitter about something he was from California and apparently didn't like this new city we were in he started talking about hanky-panky and [ __ ] and complaining about how uptight everyone here is about sex he invited the waitress to party his company was throwing after sending back the French fries he ordered I showed him a picture of my dog on my phone he took out his phone and showed me a picture of his penis we walked out of the restaurant together to get our cars from the valet my car came first and I left he texted me later that he had my sweater apparently I dropped it on the way out and if I wanted to see it again I'd have to hang out with him r.i.p sweater I've got a couple meet a guy from OkCupid he seems nice but never stops talking after interrupting me for the third or fourth time I finally asked him do you want to hear anything I have to say he apologizes profusely says you're right I'm so sorry and pulls out a pad of paper and a pen he then jot Snopes as I'm telling him about myself and whatnot I finally asked him what he's doing and he says oh I'm writing down things I want to tell you when it's my turn to talk again met another guy from OKC he knowingly used pictures that didn't accurately reflect the way he looked and kept saying you look just like your pics in shock he then told me I reminded him of his mother like it was a good thing edit didn't think this would blow up I did end up giving guy number one a second chance he said he was just nervous , Bert on our second date he had burned me a CD of his favorite music after I had already told him I don't really listen to much music and had written one hundreds of decimals of pi out on the makeshift CD cover I also hate math , he didn't really listen to anything I had to say so I let him down easy once in the throes of desperation I decided to try and meet someone on Craigslist I found a posting that seemed like a nice not insane fairly reasonable person that seemed to have common interests and we got along pretty well during our email exchange we met up at a local outdoor mall to walk around and chat for a bit and decide where to go from there she was far bigger than I had been lead to believe her definite facial hair and smelled terrible like a trooper I decided to stick it out because maybe she's really nice in person I figured worst case scenario contact with someone who wasn't a co-worker or my family would be nice over the course of the date she made multiple references to how nice it was to see so many other couples out and about that day and attempted to name our future children and discuss weddings there were some other red flag conversations that I don't recall but it was but there was not a second date I went out for dinner and a movie with a guy I tried to chip in money at both but he insisted that he cover it all at the end of the night we're sitting in his car in the parking lot of the restaurant we had just eaten at and he asks for a bj saying I mean I bought you dinner and took you to movie it's the least you can do thankfully I live nearby I hopped out and walked home finally a place to tell this story I had a very disappointing date in high school it was the dead of winter like 40 Celsius we had gone to a movie and the whole thing was really awkward she didn't really seem to want to be there was very detached after the movie and the bus trip home she admitted that the only reason she even agreed to the date with me is because my friend had turned her down a few days earlier I wasn't aware of that at the time that a pretty big letdown and waste of time but I figured whatever I'll head home and find something else to spend time on I'll get over it eventually I got off the bus and just wanted to get home as soon as possible at the bus stop there is a thigh high railing around the front of the nearby parking lot instead of walking around it I decided to step onto and then over it the second I stepped onto it I realized it was coated in ice I charmed the freak out just flip through the air lost everything in my pockets ripped my pants from astir zipper and then came down hard right onto the railing with my shin fracturing it it's still 40 out I can't just lay there till help comes so I fish around in the snow grab my stuff try to stuff my balls back into my pants and stagger home TL er it's not me it's you limped home balls in the wind I was a wrister in a cafe during college and his loyal customer asked me out took me to sue she took me to bar and bought me a drink conversation good nothing spectacular but he was cute and intelligent and funny when he takes me home he parks outside of my house and assumes he's coming in I'm like no genuinely confused he asks why not he bought me dinner and a drink and we should have hanky panky now because that's how it goes and then we start arguing about it and I start to worry that he's going to just like into my apartment whether I like it or not I am having to literally explain that just because he bought me dinner does not mean I have to freak him just listen to this Prince is sexy all girls like Prince I think I may have run when I finally got out of his car girl never showed up I was stood up I just moved to the bar and drank and ate buffalo wings the girl who brought her sister along to Chapel Road awesome I had met this really attractive Russian girl on match comm and after talking for a few days we decided to get dinner it was just awkward and she kept on making it purposely more awkward by ignoring me rolling her eyes and constantly staring around at things she got really annoyed our food wasn't coming after about five minutes it was just so busy because on the phone we had gotten along pretty great but she just refused to make small talk during the date who does that when the waitress came and asked about the check I blurted out separate took girl two movies I now realize not the best location for first dates she asks can my best friend come to comma there goes my chances basically I say of course you can trying to be nice was also assuming it was going to be a girl shows up with her friend who is indeed a guy this is when I find out that it's her one and only ex but they remain best friends and nothing is happening between them while this date is ruined let's try to salvage it go to pay for our tickets me and her even when she offered to pay for hers after buying she turns around and buys her ex's ticket we actually got along fine and they were nice people but it was like a tug of war for the rest of the night fighting for her attention of course I lose they are best friends when I get home that guy adds me on Facebook and he proceeds to tell me don't bother trying to date her she's a terrible girlfriend thanks for the heads up I finally got her alone for one more movie but it all just sort of fell apart I actually really liked her but clearly I had no effect on her oh well I guess take note future daters this is a bad idea met her in a adult soccer league asked her to grab breakfast that weekend she accepted picked her up took her to hole-in-the-wall diner ordered the garden omelet throughout the meal she talked about all the poops she was into breath play being dominated being hit but not too hard whips and cuffs as Kevin Hart would say she was getting too kinky too fast got the check realized my wallet was in my gym bag from the night before I apologized she paid for us both and I took her back to her place she invited me in and I couldn't refuse her she had just bought me a meal an hour later after the dirtiest hanky-panky of my life up to that point we were lying in bed when she gets a text and panics oh my god you have to leave my boyfriend got off work early and if he finds us he'll kick me out this is the first I'm hearing of a sow and I realize that I just flicked a chick on her boyfriend's bed after she bought me breakfast with money he gave her Frick so I throw on half my clothes jump into my car and knock over the mailbox in my rush to get the hell out of Dodge when I get home I see that my rear bumper has a nice new crack TL DR took girl out for breakfast forgot wallet had two kinky sex found out she had a long-term boyfriend damaged my car in my getaway and now she keeps texting me I was really young probably about 15 or so I was boy crazy I had a crush on every guy who even remotely expressed an interest in me but this guy there are no words to describe the sky his name was Jesse we met through a mutual friend and while he wasn't exactly my type he told me he thought I was pretty and so I wanted to give him a chance a couple weeks later we decide to meet up at the mall for our first official date he was very sweet we were holding hands you know typical teenage bull poop but then he got weird very weird we're sitting on this bench and he turns to me and stares at me right in the eyes and says well when I look at you and I look into your eyes I feel like I'm looking into your soul a cow a I'm 15 and desperate for an epic love story so I just smile he goes on dftba wesam I know this seems soon but I think you might be my soul mate I can't wait until the day we can get married and have babies and live together we are going to have such an amazing life together so let me recap I'm 15 I'm on a first date and my date just essentially proposed to me I nope the freak out of there and never talk to him again TL DR hey I just met you and this is crazy but you're my soul mate please have my babies met at work over the summer a few years back figured a movie made the most sense so there wasn't time for awkward conversation Laos lo and behold Vic Girl with the Dragon Tattoo because I never read it that was awkward met a girl in a bar bought her a drink agreed to meet again went to her house to pick her up her dad comes to the door angry and screams the Frick do you want with my seventeen-year-old daughter exclamation point I tried to explain where how I met her and he screamed her name and slammed the door I quickly left and renamed her number as do not answer about 10 minutes from picking a girl up she asked me to pull to the side of the road to take a poop and then proceeds to poop in front of my car edit this is now my most upvoted comment so thank you for making me laugh about it again first date the girl started lighting matches would put them out with her fingers then heat the burnt matchstick head TL DR dated satan got stood up at a cafe she called and told me an emergency had come up and she wasn't going to make it I had only been waiting for three or four minutes and wasn't too upset about it so I called a friend to see what he was doing ended up meeting him across town at the bar he was drinking at where he introduced me to my date he had just met playing pool there a guy in college took me out not to a Chinese restaurant but to the parking lot of a Chinese restaurant to look at a tacky plastic Buddha statue we had to walk through several blocks of sketchy area in the dark to get there and he kept rubbing my back the entire way there and back even after I asked him to stop I've only had one bad one and it was this girl who wouldn't shut up about her Rex it was predictably our only date I went to the movie Schindler's List on a first and last date when I was like 16 years old oh I got this so met a girl online and we started talking everything was grand she and I texted often and seemed to be hitting it off well so we meet and start having dinner everything is good except she just seems a bit off we order a pitcher of margaritas we each have one and in mid-sentence she just stops talking and stares at her hands just looking at them I asked if she's okay and she says oh I'm sorry I'm just really drunk I say really we'd only had one drink she says they know I've been drinking all day now I stop and think about past conversations she texted me a lot saying hey I'm a little drunk walking home keep me company I start thinking this might be a trend with her she then proceeds to fastplant into the table I think she's joking because it was so exaggerated I laugh and realize she isn't moving by tap her and wake her and I call for the check which was a little bit more than I'd figured she then asks if I could walk Hado I said I would a she was in pretty rough shape we start walking more and more and then I asked how much farther she says another mile so we walk some more and finally get to her place she offers me some water and then asks if I want to stay I politely declined and she kicked me out so that was that I had to use a GPS to find my way back to my car hey you thanks for watching if you enjoyed this video consider subscribing and hitting like also if you have an Alexa device you can say Alexa open read it stories to hear some of the all-time top ask reddit posts thanks for watching

Channel: Reddit Stories

Views: 8,912

Rating: 4.759563 out of 5

Keywords: askreddit stupid, funny reddit comments, askreddit scary, askreddit funny, reddit top posts, askreddit, askreddit comedy, toad films, updoot reddit, storytime with reddit, reddit and chill, reddit, worst date, tinder fail, date fail, tinder, dating, flirting, bad date

Id: u6tCscEjPVI

Length: 20min 49sec (1249 seconds)

Published: Fri Dec 27 2019