What Happened When You Asked Her Dad For Permission To Marry Her?

serious have you asked your girlfriend's father for his blessing to marry his daughter and he said no what happened after he said no I found a job and his no became a yes in all fairness he actually said not until you get a job I was a senior in college at the time in fairness that seems reasonable we were young I was about to move 1000 plus miles away without a firm job prospect I asked her parents for both permission and blessing over a seriously nice steak dinner they politely said no I asked why they are gain politely expressed concern over our ages vocations and potential separation anxiety fueled puppy love marriage dreams and their desire to make sure their daughter didn't wind up destitute with a deadbeat bum since we all had my then girlfriend's best interests at heart I had no trouble genuinely thanking them though I was sad I followed up by telling them we'd wait and prove our commitments and capabilities weighted and distance dated for a year asked again over incredibly cheap nasty green burrito del Taco got both permission and blessing married a year later just celebrated 15 years of marriage and three kids and that was one of several interactions which contributed to the great relationship we all have with each other individually and corporately which means there wasn't a shred of angst nastiness over Christmas when we had her entire family parents siblings nieces nephews over I asked her dad while we were at his cottage fishing he gave me a a stone-cold stare then said are you freakin crazy you two are perfect for each other why would you want to ruin that with marriage I now have an awesome father-in-law who I regularly go fishing with her dad and I used to go and walk the dog together in order to get to know each other better he is a pretty good guy and had lots of good advice over time I made up my mind to marry his daughter but was going to ask him first being slightly intimidated even though he is as tall as me he is a pretty big guy okay Who am I kidding he could have been a [ __ ] and I would have been intimidated on one of those walks I finally popped the question and it went something like this me sir what would you say if I asked for your daughter's hand in marriage him I would have to say number me um know him yeah what kind of a sick bastard are you me confused and really intimidated now sick bastard him really angry voice yeah why would you just want her hand in marriage you expect me to just cut it off this is a whole package deal you either take all or nothing then he started laughing my wife and I are married almost 20 years now and have two awesome kids guess it worked out I specifically did not ask my wife's parents for permission my now wife was studying abroad in England and I was planning to go visit her over Thanksgiving so I took her parents out to lunch and I said mr. and mrs. Smith I'm going to visit your daughter for a week in November and I intend to ask her to marry her while I'm there I wanted to let you know and to ask for your blessing her mom said what if we say no and I replied I'm not asking your permission we're both adults and capable of making this decision on our own but I know it would be a huge relief to both of us if we knew you were on board her mom just said I'm not comfortable with this and got up and went to the bathroom at which point her dad said I don't have any problems with it it took several months for her mom to come around but she's made her peace with it now and my wife and I have been married for three and a half years now and have a good relationship with both sets of parents my wife was Pentecostal and her father was the pastor of her church and had promised her to the son of one of the more prominent members of the church when she finished her associate's degree he never recognized our relationship and during HS watched over us like a hawk when we graduated she moved out to attend school and I got a decent paying job her family was old school so I had to ask she had said she was marrying me either way but wanted me to respect her father by asking when I asked him he said and this is about as close as I can remember there is no way I will ever let you marry my daughter you and your family are the scum of the earth and I don't want that around her she is already married to man she was promised to in my eyes I just said her well GF said she was marrying me anyway I was only asking out of respect for your customs I love your daughter more than any other man excluding you I will provide for her care for her always be by her side and I will never let her down I said that what you really want for her I guarantee you the man you want her to marry won't be able to do any of those things I walked out and a week or so later he called me and told me I had dis blessing we've had a solid relationship since I got my crap together he had said figure out the answer to his questions and asked her gain in six months I didn't have to ask again I went out got my college financials sorted out signed up for more classes found a job and a month later bought a brand new Civic he was incredibly impressed with and proud of me for how quickly I stopped being a dumb Bart my father-in-law said yes kinda he is an alcoholic and that time I was about to ask he came up from the basement a bit more drunk than usual points at me and motions for me to follow little did I know my mother-in-law rent now wife thought he was off the deep end and they thought he was going to hurt kill me me being nervous about asking I did not notice they both casually walked downstairs to make sure I wasn't dead mostly he wanted to lecture me and show his concern for his daughter I thought you said this for a moment come a little did I know my mother-in-law and now wife for back story I am a Muslim and my now husband is white when we first decided that we were going to get married I knew he would have to ask my dad it just so happened that he was visiting my grandparents I actually live with my dad's parents which are also my legal guardians so I talked to my grandparents first about what I should say to my dad to prepare him for this my husband has two kids from a previous failed marriage and my grandparents did not want me to mention this fact to my dad now I personally felt that I should tell him the truth in that situation so I did and he went on this tirade on how I will be slaving over child support all my life and how he would just get me pregnant and leave me my dad was furious and didn't want anything to do with me getting married to my potential husband to the point that he yelled as his own parents about how it was their fault that I ended up this way and lab they were dead to him my grandparents only wanted to see me happy and they saw me truly happy with him sir my potential husband asked my grandparents for my hand they gave him their blessing and my uncle dad's brother made an agreement for both of us to pay for half of the wedding and my uncle will pay for half when the wedding was over with my uncle surprised me with just paying for the entire thing and gave us his blessing as well my dad is still not speaking with me and now he feels extremely guilty he started talking to my grandmother again but hey he missed out not my fault : never ask permission ask for their blessing to marry my father-in-law was a very devout churchgoer that once respect for his blue-collar life upbringing I told him I wanted his blessing in that I loved his daughter and was not asking for his permission he respected my words and invited me into the family first with the handshake then started crying and hugged me he is a very good man and we talked about his shortcomings and my plan to support the both of us long story short most of her family are Jamaican immigrants and wanted her to marry a Jamaican specifically one who is a Protestant like they are I am a Caucasian without religion so after being together for five amazing years I asked her father for his blessing to marry her or he laughed like I was telling a joke then when he realized I was serious he said that if we got married or pregnant they would disown her and shun her from the family I hated that they put her in that position but they didn't they followed through with it eventually they put her on the spot and made her choose she picked her family Roe I'm sorry to hear that wish you the best my dad was Protestant my mom was Catholic and so mums dad straight-up refused to come to the wedding because he felt that too shouldn't intermarry the wedding went on without him and he had regretted it shortly after it turned into the biggest embarrassment and regret of his entire life but thankfully a few years later everyone forgave each other and lived happily ever after a friend of mine is an atheist and wanted to marry a Christian girl from a super religious family he called her dad and asked for permission and her dad said no so he replied I was only calling you to be polite I'm going to marry her anyway and he did why you gotta be so rude MRR marry her in ways and I did I went back and asked to game six months later and again six months after that it was definitely for the best because we needed to wait for financial reasons partly why he said no and it worked out great to wait the extra couple years yep I had about ten thousand dollars in personal debt credit card debt and as a financial planner he couldn't let that slide he said pay off your debt first then you can marry my daughter then he took me to the bank where he co-signed the consolidation loan that put all of those credit card payments into one lump sum real jejeje situation I paid off the debt and then asked his daughter to marry me 11 years in May TL DR I asked her father said no I told them it was Curtis he asked and trucked along ándale ended up just fine ten years married I'm Caucasian my now wife is Chinese raised in Canada by very traditional parents I was in law school working hard but in debt my wife had graduated from our school and was 3,000 miles away to start her career her parents were visiting her in Toronto and given that I had plans in motion I asked to speak to them on the phone and asked her father for permission to marry their daughter they said no I honestly hadn't prepared for that so I guess the most honest reaction was my natural reaction I told them that I was mostly asking out of courtesy and would likely do so anyway and had then passed the phone back to her I told her what just went down as a warning and hung up apparently a huge argument between them and her erupted among the issues I wasn't Chinese and didn't share their culture guilty but I am pretty open-minded I lived so far away we fix that soon enough they didn't speak my language well Nura theirs I have learned a lot of Chinese since then and their English was not that bad I didn't have a serious job because I was in school now I do alright I was in loads of debt well yeah overall a rough day for a long-distance relationship well like the parentheses above suggests we got engaged anyway and two years later got married and all has been swell in the 10 years since her parents are lovely people who wanted the best for their only daughter and couldn't see past the immediate situation into our well planned future and they were scared about an outsider being brought into the family I'm sure they imagined their daughter marrying a nice Chinese boy and I couldn't fit that bill I am happy to say that I have gotten to know them very well and we get along great they call me son are proud of us and our accomplishments and our overall awesome in-laws it helped that when her mom went back home and told her co-workers what had happened they were like oh he asked you that's so sweet of him he didn't have to do that Thanks random ex coworkers I think it woke them up to the fact that their Western raised adults daughter could make decisions on her own side funny note one concern they had which they didn't raise at the time was this they thought white guys didn't take marriage seriously because they're only insight into Western culture was Hollywood movies TV shows gossip magazines and stuff where the couples are either foolishly romantic jumping and jumping and humping and pumping and pumping and pumping and dumping and dumping incomplete I have certainly assured them since that I am no George Clooney and look even he has settled down sort of my girlfriend's mom has a strange habit of shoving conversations in the deep end of the pool then trying to make everything uncomfortable for everyone swimming discussing there one night I had been invited to dinner at their family home and I was being interrogated conversing about my life plans and methods for getting there somewhere around graduate from college the mom brought up the topic of children then switched it to marriage then started asking questions about the wedding that we hadn't planned or agreed to have her father said something to the effect of nothing's going to happen without my say-so anyways i calmly and politely informed the table that my plan had always been to get married after college if i was with the right woman that my plan had not changed and that her opinion was the only one importance to that decision I further stated that I didn't believe in the father paying for everything and that weddings should be cozy gatherings that the new couple can pay for and my reasoning should be sufficient for any reasonable adults to accept I was then called an arrogant bastard and given a beer and a third steak we are still not married but at this point we're just waiting until we can't take a honeymoon our work schedules don't really allow for such right now and the wedding will be cheap I'm paying to have a friend ordained and licensed the venue will be the family cottage the food will be from the family catering business and few of them drink three bottles of good liquor should cover the bar and a few beers if the beer was an arrogant bastard ale by Stone this would have been the most awkwardly brilliant thing ever when my bf asked my dad dad wished him good luck and reminded him he was asking to marry an only child they had a good laugh about it and my bf decided to marry me anyway being married nearly seven years and now have a strong-willed girl of our own r.i.p dad miss you terribly well I asked and he originally said yes then changed his mind six months later because we're not getting married in a church and are not religious he found out I am atheist and now will not walk her down the aisle I told him if he wouldn't walk her down the aisle he was not invited to the wedding and lat he asked his permission out of respect I also said he needs to make a choice whether he wants to be included in our family or not we are going to be a family with or without you I went to the bar my father-in-law goes who every day at 3:30 I order two beers and two shots and after the shots I asked if I could marry his daughter he laughed and said this is the second time today now I am thinking who else is trying to marry my girl my now sister-in-law got married at City called for some tax reasons so her now husband went to his house at 8:00 a.m. to ask if it was ok however I honestly thought someone else was trying to marry my girl this is hilarious my father-in-law didn't say no he didn't say anything in the course of a 15 minute conversation I asked him several times told him that his blessing would mean a lot to me and his daughter but each time he managed to skirt the question in many ways that tacit disapproval has defined our isn't my entire relationship my wife is his elder child and his only daughter so it's understandable that he thinks no one in the world is good enough for her to boot I'm a short pasty nerd and both my wife and my father-in-law are tall jerks that may sound like a trivial difference but my father in lawyers that can summit Alpha Male Athlete anyone who can't benchpress 300 pounds will run a 5-second 40-yard dash is interacting with the world on fundamentally different terms than him my wife and I have been married nearly 10 years and that early interaction with my father-in-law pretty much set the tone for the entire decade we are civil with each other and often friendly but rarely more than that I think he's gotten the message by now that I'm not going anywhere so we're going to have to deal with each other but I don't think we're ever going to be close I don't have a lot of respect for him for reasons not really germane to this post but he did produce my favorite person in the world for that I thank him I was 19 and asked my now father-in-law for his blessing he and his wife looked at each other and said well I don't know something clicked in my head I'm Lutheran they are a pretty devout Catholic family Catholic enough that they won't go to a wedding in a church other than a Catholic Church so I then mentioned that I was thinking about taking classes to become Catholic they then said I suppose then I've been married for over 11 years now I have a really good relationship with them still haven't taken any classes though don't plan on doing them anytime soon either I do attend Catholic Mass with my wife though when I was a lot younger I had a Croatian girlfriend when we decided to meet the parents I was a little nervous her father was a bit strange at first when he met me I brought her home on my Honda 900 turned out later his eldest son had died in a bike accident and he hated bikes ever since wish my gf had thought to tell me anyway after a while and a few drinks we were getting on okay he asked me what are your intentions towards my daughter and I told him we are just friends can't believe he accepted that at the time we were living together and later on we got engaged he asked me if Qatar his daughter ever acted upon me when I answered no not really he smiled and told me well if she ever does you just smack her in the face that will quiet her down I was shocked into silence I told her later and she said yes that's dad all right he also wouldn't let his thirty new daughter go to the swimming pool because she'd have to wear a swimsuit and boys might look at her my GF his eldest daughter had ran away from home that 17 and never went back until we went to meet her dad because he was too controlling I commented that he was probably going to make the youngest do the same thing and she did a few years later guys sounds like a real peach until he began dating my wife had a reputation as an adult tantrum thrower her older sister meanwhile was just the sweetest kindest person you've ever met but she had saddled herself with a loser boyfriend for ten years who has never opposed I quickly put an end to my future wife's tantrums by being the first person in her life who did not tolerates it she respected that I would stand up to her and she changed her ways I went to her parents alone and asked for their daughter's hand in marriage their answer was an immediate yes they loved the positive influence I'd had on their daughter but then her dad said something that I will always remember Huck I always thought she'd be the hard daughter to marry off my wife is her daddy's little princess in a good way think very high society southern Gone with the Wind type of family when it was time for me to ask my girlfriend's father everyone knew he was coming including him he didn't want to have to face the fact that his little girl was all grown up so he avoided me for two weeks he would see my car in the driveway and just keep driving and not come home until I was gone one time I left my car around the corner and when he walked in and saw me sitting there he quickly said something about having to go to the store and he left he did that again the next day so I said that I would ride with him we got in the car and proceeded to have the stereotypical can you take care of her in a manner to which she has become accustomed talk he didn't really say yes but he didn't say no two hours later I asked if he still needed to go to the store of course he did and so we went back into the house what he didn't know was that we had already gotten engaged three days prior to our conversation I had planned a big dinner etc to pop the question and since he avoided me for so long that night came before he would talk to me so she would take the ring off before going into the house every night until we talked we just celebrated our 18th anniversary yesterday he still doesn't really like me because I stole his little girl but I don't care I didn't finish college so I decided that I was joining the military but I wanted to get married first so I could get better pay from the get-go and she could get the benefit so I asked permission to my father in law and he said no that it was too soon been dating her five years already told my girl to meet me at the courthouse the next day we got married anyway but after it we went back to families like nothing happened we kept it quiet a month later I went to boot camp and while I was there my wife dropped the bomb that we were married and we were planing a little church wedding when I got back form training got to skip all the annoying planning phase and we had a wonderful ceremony with family and friends that was 21 years ago and we still together now I'm retired from the military and attending college because of the nature of my last career we had kids life so they are still very young and I didn't miss much of their upbringing they think his fun that dad goes to school and his homework good luck I married her anyway and the bouncers at my wedding had instructions to remove him rather aggressively should he try to cause a scene my beloved father hadn't been a part of her life for some time he was an unemployed bum living off all his elderly parents in his late 50s he wouldn't hold down a job he wouldn't pay his bills he didn't have a permanent address bouncing around between relatives his explanation for his lifestyle was God will provide I met the man once before the wedding when he came to a Thanksgiving dinner and bitched about the quality of the free food he was eating he wasn't invited to the wedding but he showed up anyways he showed up 15 minutes before the ceremony seriously 15 minutes wanting to walk his daughter down the aisle the fancy panicked but is willing to let him if only to keep the peace then right as everyone is gathering for the ceremony he pulls me off to the side yes absolutely livid that that didn't ask his permission to marry his daughter so I break down and ask him explaining how much I love his daughter how she is the only thing that makes life worth living how I want nothing more than to grow old and die with her how she is the missing part of my soul and may I please have his blessing to marry him daughter the sucker says no not just no but he's going to disrupt the ceremony he doesn't want his Christian daughter to marry a pagan bastard pagan bastard his words I'm about to murder my soon-to-be wife's father I'm seriously considering shooting this sucker in the face in full view of the wedding party God's bless my groomsmen one was a local police officer an there was a security contractor think Blackwater one was a 20-year veteran of ice one was a leader in the local Satanic temple and looked the part and the last was an individual who was around six feet four inches tall and 340 pounds of pure malevolent mass they pulled him away from me and had a quiet conversation I don't know what was said I just know that the wedding went off without a hitch and I only had to deal with him one more time before he died I made it a clear point that I was asking for his blessing and not his permission he is a grown woman and can decide who she wishes to marry I asked for his blessing he said no I asked him why he gave me his reasons I greatly disagree with his reasons and were getting married next July I don't feel as though I need his blessing for us to have a happy marriage he doesn't dislike he just doesn't think we're ready I respect that but I don't agree that he's right I remember calling my soon-to-be father-in-law to ask him for permission here's how the conversation went me hey father-in-law Phil Phil no you leverage and grenadine you cannot marry my daughter me aaww why not Phil what's up me no that's what I was going to ask Phil what me may I marry your daughter Phil wait what put her on the phone apparently he said it as a joke I was not joking when dad jokes go bad very traditional Indian girl her father scoffed she offered to abandon the family for me I declined because I knew she would regret it I asked with my girlfriend present for permission from both parents being native Chinese my wife was there to translate just in case after I asked her her mom looked concerned to her dad then said sorry too young determined not to wimp out we then all went to a super awkward dinner at a plays an hour away we all rode together as my girlfriend now wife argued in Chinese with her parents looking back idk how I managed to handle it Frick I would never do that again lol my dad asked my grandfather for my mom's hand in marriage and my grandfather in through dad joke form said you can take the rest of her - my wife and I met dated and got engaged in England where I live all the while her family was in Arizona in the States here's a little background her family is really close literally one sister lives in a detached house the other and we husband two block away and the two others like three blocks away they are at my in-laws house every day so I called her father and asked a dater I put myself in his shoes with this random foreign dude suddenly dating his daughter and I wanted to do what I could to ease that situation he was incredibly nice hinted that he thought we would get married one day and that was that as time progressed and they saw how serious we were I think it dawned on them that we both wanted to stay in England which meant we wouldn't be a block away so one day they suddenly just became really cold and hard to work with conversations were awkward and they did things to strain our relationship let me just pause here to say I love my in-laws they are great I'm not trying to bad talk them just explain so I knew I was going to marry my wife we both knew 100% and just a side note my whole family loved her and were totally supportive and on board so I made the call but by this time I knew what his answer would be I called and asked and he said no as I began to explain where I and my wife were coming from he just got angry and said I had a rebellious spirit he said I would never get his blessing until I saw him in person I explained to him that it wasn't possible for me to leave my commitments in England school work et Cie but my family would love to have them out lots of heated talking ensued and ended with a firm never sir my wife and I had a tough choice wipes despite the fact we knew we would get married or go forward and do our best to salvage these relationships the day we got engaged we were super happy and also incredibly sad we spent a few hours crying together after receiving some hard messages from some family members a few months later I flew to Arizona after sorting our school and leaving work thankfully I can say that within the first week of them seeing us together and how I loved her a lot of problems were fixed in the past my wife had been in an abusive relationship and my mother-in-law told me she was scared I was the same way but she said that when she saw me serve her and love her those preconceived ideas of me disappeared and she saw who I was things are still a little hard with my father-in-law my wife and I are actually going next week and I have set time aside with just him and I to spend time together and talk there are aspects I need to apologize for not making more of an effort to communicate during the whole process and I'm hoping this will fully mend our relationship that's my story and I'm sticking to it : marrying her anyway he's only 13 years older than me but I basically sat down with him and explained that a30 I think I am mature enough to support his daughter and at 25 she's not a little girl anymore if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 11,040

Rating: 4.7620397 out of 5

Keywords: asking for permission, permission to marry daughter, permission to marry your daughter, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh

Id: v1ElVKhWAp8

Length: 30min 7sec (1807 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 22 2020