This gonna be last video Uncle Roger gonna make In this house Did I scare niece and nephew? Haiya, don't worry, Uncle Roger not going anywhere Uncle Roger moving because cannot afford rent here I getting kicked out by landlord Netflix has new cooking show Cooking with Paris Let's see if niece Paris good chef or not Who wear like that to grocery store? Why are you buying haiya This cooking show, don't buy cereal Cook yourself! Cook yourself! Uncle Roger think grown adults should not eat cereal I don't trust anyone who's food come from box I love cooking But I'm not a trained chef What? I'm not trying to be I have a few go-to dishes I'm inviting my friends over to test them out This looks so bomb So she not chef So this not even cooking instruction video This just rich people fucking around in kitchen I feel tricked already What niece Paris good at Oh she media personality What skill you need to be media personality? Great-granddaughter of Conrad Hilton, founder of Hilton Hotels Oh that the skill you need Born to rich family Today I'm tackling breakfast Cereal is my favorite food group No no no cereal cannot be your favorite food group Everybody's favorite food group should be MSG And my number one? Lucky Charms Lucky Charms? For me, it's a midnight snack Lucky Charms very sweet All Breakfast in America so much sugar Lucky Charms is a type of cereal with marshmallow in it Marshmallow in your breakfast, haiya Marshmallow only for camping not for breakfast When Uncle Roger growing up as a kid Only one type of cereal-Corn Flakes It's so bland and tasteless It like eating little flake of sad But I want to become a mom soon So learning to love mornings and breakfast is high on the to-do list Okay let's judge her kitchen Let's see Oh oh gas stove Niece Paris have gas stove Fuiyoh! Better than BBC food already Hmm, there are no rice cooker anywhere But I think it okay Niece Paris too white and rich If you ask Niece Paris to get rice cooker She gonna think you asking her to hire some Chinese guy Prepping blue marshmallows She making blue marshmallows for breakfast? Smells so good Haiya Niece Paris you say you want to become mom But I want to become a mom soon You can't even slap Tupperware properly How you gonna smack your kid? Niece and nephew better smack like button now Otherwise Uncle Roger come and smack you Using microwave To melt marshmallow My favorite Lucky Charms are the turquoise blue ones So I'm trying to make my very own ones that are kind of like that pretty baby blue color Okay blue dye go in Good Haiya who wear this type of glove when cooking Almost forgot the most important part- glitter Glit glit what? Almost forgot the most important part-glitter She putting glitter in breakfast Uncle Roger don't want my breakfast to remind me of strip club haiya That's what I call sliving blue marshmallows Sliving？ Sliving equals slaying plus living your best life That what Uncle Roger doing every day I sliving! She's so rich she never use cling film before So awkward Now everything is ready for tomorrow Where's the milk Dope Multi-millionaire but her fridge look so poverty So now her friend Kim Kardashian coming -Hi! - Hi, gorgeous. -This is what you cook in? - Yes Looking amazing Thank you Wait, you redid it! -Yes - You did the floors Rich people house look very nice But always look so empty Where your family photo? Where your Chinese calendar? This house feel like waiting room at spa Where the cosy? Where the cosy? Cooking with Kim Kardashian West Look how cute my cooking book is That is so you Yeah it's so her White with nothing good inside That's the fun part Of having kids as you can cook with them and do fun things We do pizza nights where I get dough and I just get tons of toppings and I let them roll it out and make pizzas Haiya When Niece Kim ask her children to make pizza It's so cute and adorable But when Uncle Roger do the same It call child labor Do you want to wear gloves Because I have a lot of blue food dye -Okay -So Sliving plastic gloves so we don't dye our fingers Do you do it over your lace gloves? Yes. These are my, like, sliving cooking gloves Everything with her, sliving this sliving that haiya It like she don't have other word in brain Gonna try a Chanel I don't know if this is gonna work To get it out of here That not thick enough I wish these were, like, harder I did it this last night Oh man This is gonna be a disaster This looks like slime This looks like slime If your marshmallow look like smurf diarraha You fucked up If they want to make blue marshmallow You can just dye the marshmallow No need to melt it first haiya If this was cookies, it would work, right? I'm gonna need to, like, touch up my makeup I'm literally crying Oh my God. Wait, do I have blue all over my face? A tiny, above your eyebrow but it's, like, a little, and it has glitter Hold on, I'll just do it very lightly Uncle Roger miss the time when Auntie Helen would do that to me What is love The plastic ones The plastic ones totally work better That's cute Yours is cute. My star's They figure it out Not bad, not bad! I think we just go like this Assuming... Never done this Haiya Niece Paris, that blowtorch too small That blowtorch for children You need to get proper flamethrower Now they gonna make the second dish Frittata Have you made a frittata before? Frittata No Okay Okay this is going to be... either really easy or really difficult Frittata good because at least it a bit more effort than just scramble egg How to make fluffy frittata You will need Correct correct Not bad, ingredient all look good Do you eat bacon? I got turkey bacon and normal I got turkey bacon Turkey bacon haiya That not real bacon If you want to eat bacon, eat the real shit Turkey bacon for loser Remember Princess Pigelette, my pig that I had? I'm like scared to like Well not scared, I feel bad to eat pigs after her because she like was my child So now she don't eat pig Because she used to live with pig With that logic Uncle Roger should stop eating pig also Because I used to live with Auntie Helen To the blender add six eggs heavy whipping cream, onion powder Haiya onion powder You both so rich Get real onion, real onion! Chopping onions easiest thing to do But you choose onion powder Don't use real onion She don't use real bacon This frittata gonna be faker than Kim Kardashian ass Do you have a blender? This or that? Is that the same thing as a blender -I don't know my sisters use that all the time -It is -Is that the same as a blender? -It is They not the same thing haiya That is expensive kitchenaid stand mixer It not blender, they not the same Yes Blender, blender, blender -Oh. - That? Thank God that producer that to tell them So the blender So let's put six eggs But no no You can't use blender to mix eggs haiya Everything wrong now Blender slide shit up You want to mix eggs What is in the action? You want to mix egg, you use mixer, use mixer! Will you cut these in... Ten small tomatoes. Just cut 'em in half. This better not squirt on me At least something squirting on you Uncle Roger miss those days Sorry children Niece and nephew See, her chopping technique so awkward Cut my finger off Ooh Because she holding the knife too high You cannot hold knife like this, no control Niece Paris how to chop How to chop You need to hold knife at bottom of blade like this Half a teaspoon of onion powder Oh my God. These are cute, the cherries I know. How cute are they? So cute Onion powder is the wrong type of white powder Where the MSG This is the perfect time to use MSG haiya The king of flavor going to make your frittata better Put MSG on your marshmallow also Why not? It tastier than glitter Eww, Look at the bacon When those are cooked more This don't look good Why your bacon look like chewing gum Real bacon so satisfying to cook It sizzle, it sizzle! This sizzle sound almost as sad as Jamie Oliver sizzling spring onion Do you have tongs? What's a tong? - It's a thing like... - Like those? She don't know what tong is? No I have to -You have to. -Where is a tong-y? Niece Paris probably think Tong is my brother or something Oh, there's one. - Okay. - This? Yeah, I didn't know it called that I just called it, like, "the picking up thing thing." She called what what what's she called tong? I just called it, like, "the picking up thing thing." If she call tong "the picking up thing thing" Does she also call oven the hot heating box box? Does she call a toaster "the danger danger bath bomb"? All right. Blend this bitch. Puree, liquefy No, no no -Any of it will blend the eggs -Yes Oh no, the egg ruined now Using blender for egg, the egg texture not gonna be good You trying to make frittata not smoothie I'm just concerned that these bacon strips By the way it okay to use metal Because this cast iron saucepan, not non-stick Niece and nephew, don't freak out At least it's not real bacon -So we just pour this in it says? -Yeah I think it's too much egg mixture You need more topping in this frittata Half a cup of Parmesan Ok, cheese good Transfer to oven Correct Go to oven I'm so happy that we learned how to make this Yeah I'm sure you're going to be doing it over and over So if it were me, in my kitchen, this is when you take the 12 minutes to clean Look at her face, look at her face! Niece Paris definitely never clean anything before in her life She like oh shit Need to clean now, shit That the face Uncle Roger make when I realized Jamie Oliver still cooking Cooking tip Kitchens don't clean themselves That not tip You wanna put it all in the dishwasher? Ah, dishwasher I surprise she didn't call it the "soapy soap clang clang machine" Now they gonna eat it, finally Breakfast time First of all The cutest All my cooking utensils are... Okay let's see her frittata Don't pretend It don't look that good That the sound that make these two women famous I can't believe we made this It tastes like a restaurant This is restaurant-worthy No it's not look at this Too much egg, I can't even see any topping That not good frittata haiya And marshmallows Oh Okay marshmallow actually look good, Uncle Roger quite impress Uncle Roger suspect they threw away the first batch Remember the first slimy marshmallow that look like placenta I think they throw that out and make new batch I think they cheating a little bit This show, a bit pointless If you want to make it more interesting I want niece Paris to go to Asia Cook in outdoor kitchen Maybe cook with Wang Gang and his uncle Or cook with Mark Weins and his mother-in-law That would be so funny, gonna improve the show And no dishwasher, We gonna use Niece Kim children as dishwasher The Asian way Everytime Uncle Roger filming video, it the hottest day in London People don't know London weather, they watch my video They think London tropical country haiya Uncle Roger make how many video now? maybe like 50 video And I sweating in half of them Multi-millionaire but her fridge look like refugee camp Uncle Roger miss when Auntie Helen used to do that to me What is love So stupid ♬What is love♬ I didn't burn any of my computer stuff and camera You don't use real bacon, you don't use real onion This frittata gonna be faker than her tit.. Oh god Niece Paris can squirt on Uncle Roger any time With that logic, Uncle Roger should stop eating pig also Because I used to live with Auntie Helen Fire emoji
