Trying to Beat Hardcore Minecraft with My Idiot Friends

hello again welcome back you and I have met in a bit of a pickle you see I'm stuck on an island in the middle of the sky it's just me this acacia tree and a few blocks of grass now you may be asking questions like mt why are you stuck and Mt how did you end up here and Mt what made you abandon me as an 8-year-old child in 2003 well let's start at the beginning a few days ago I rounded my friends up set up a Minecraft server and got to work on my next great video it had the perfect plan play with my friends in hardcore but if anyone dies that's it we delete the world and start fresh but you know what you don't have to start fresh Opera GX that's right fuckos this video is sponsored by Opera GX the most web browser ever made do you struggle with the lack of notifications don't well I think you do you clearly aren't distracted enough it's time to cram every app and website under the sun into your browser twitch streams Discord chats heinous Tik toks your mother's extremist WhatsApp group 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the pinned comment or description below to download oper today and get my sick wallpaper thank you once again to Opex for sponsoring this segment and anyway back to the video in this Minecraft challenge we had only one goal kill the ender dragon and finish the game as you can imagine this did not go down as smooth as one might have hoped oh [ __ ] so why don't I take you back to the start of this terrible Adventure let us begin day one to make this challenge a bit more interesting we had installed the voice chat Bo so before the others got on Tristan and I did a few practice runs to test it out we didn't think we'd actually finish it and of course we did not practice run number one we got our bearings mined some iron waddled around a bit and found the entrance to this cave where Tristan inexplicably decided to jump into this water are we doing this doing it he missed attempt two we did pretty much the exact same thing and well watch this watch this watch the Speed speed hack right go like this attempt three Tristan got blun into death by an iron golem attempt four we got a few more people on built this little base built a portal went on and Tristan at the very first opportunity fell into a Laval Lake attempt five I got brutally assaulted by piglins and attempt six I got brutally assaulted by piglins the boys were now online which concluded our preliminary attempts now on to the main event which I assure you would only be getting much worse okay for real this time day one attempt one our spawn location for today was this beachy jungly sort of place wood check tools check flint and steel check animals burning in their own flip Jack we had absolutely no plan so why not do some sseeing oh look at that that's a cool Lake I like that Lake this looks this reminds me of Brazil yeah okay I haven't seen any gang Warfare yet generally things were going well now remember we had absolutely no plan so when the sun inevitably set and the mobs in inevitably spawned we had no choice but to run away and hide in the cave in this cave is where we hatched our plan for the base all right you guys you guys can go mining we're going to put a lighthouse like here is this is a terrible spot to put a lighthouse by the way going to build a who are we guiding V you [ __ ] idiot um maybe this isn't the best spot for a lighthouse so how about uh here Tristan and my friend we're clearly not interested hey guys your Lighthouse looks like [Music] [ __ ] now despite them insulting our beautiful lighthouse I later joined them in a mining Expedition without iron armor people can die from all sorts of very silly things so getting some for everybody was our first priority and of course we always need diamonds I found diamonds who doesn't love some good old diamonds where are you guys uh hello I will admit to not having the best sense of direction particularly in Minecraft Caves so when I went one way and Al and trist with the other I got lost hello [Music] hello caves are spookier with proximity chat one moment you're good you're talking and the next silence just you and the mines said where' you go oh boys boys where you go where are you guys where are you I found you guys once I found them again we surfaced and went our separate ways I returned to the lighthouse and they returned to their own spot across the water the lighthouse had come along quite nicely and Tristan was even kind enough to GI us a clock now you know when it's night and day now I know what when it's night time damn Ben however not content with this gift decided to follow them and track down this mystery base they were hiding in I followed their face was uh rather unremarkable but they did have these one of which was filled with stuff naturally Ben stole it Ben stole my [ __ ] chest man Ben you now Tristan isn't exactly one to take things lying down and Ben had gone too far this time making things even worse I did this feverishly building my how big oh no the crops oh my God I'm sorry oh my goodness the boat you also sunk the chest boat button now it wasn't all bad sure I had sunk all of Tristan's prize possessions to the bottom of the ocean but it led us down to a cool underwater cave in which we utilized the door method I don't know how people die in like underwater caving Expeditions just bring a freaking door you imile just bring a door this little underwater cave went quite deep deep enough in in fact that I found some diamonds and as we all know nothing bad ever happens after finding [Music] diamonds now you may be thinking damn this Tristan guy is an [ __ ] he just blew up our Lighthouse and killed poor innocent Ben In Cold Blood well uh you'd be right but that wouldn't be an accurate retelling of events now watch closely Tristan sneaks into the lighthouse places his first TNT it explodes sticks his second TNT down it also explodes and sticks his third TNT down now now watch Ben closely watch the cogs turn in this man's head Ben has a decision to make escape the explosion or defend the lighthouse and fight off Tristan Ben chose neither of these options instead he walked into the TNT and removed all his armor framing Tristan in his own suicide Ben you're an absolute rat bastard and so attempt number two the beginning of our deterioration Village check Bell check buuck it check [ __ ] it let's go to the nether so we went to the nether was going to the nether a good idea no I could just tell someone was going to fall in a pool of BL and die lucky for me though no one fell in a pool of lava and died instead our friends Tobias and Nathan in their infinite smooth brained wisdom decided to try and break the Overworld portal with stone tools which wouldn't have actually done anything and even better during this process they died attempt three another Savannah wood check Stone check and Tois has died to a creeper again oh my God [ __ ] Tobias [ __ ] Tobias attempt four Forest spawn wood check tools check really big hole check race the bottom one block of water attempt five time to run fast you know what's better than beating the game picking a direction at random and just running away we went extremely fast way too fast to speaked coherently so fast that yeah pigs pig pig pigs Pig oh Pig quick Qui spe there he is it's give a lad liad we went M mode M mode excavated an area found an underwater cave unw M mode and found this cool floating island thing where my friend Steven whose name I cannot show for legal reasons did this all right well attempt six I spice I spice I spice I spice yes Ben that's right ice spice instead of doing something productive we ran towards the ice spice biome and built some [Music] boats and then suddenly my friend Jackie fell and died attempt seven we were getting tired and Tristan in particular was somewhat losing his mind oh right can you use MBL cop sign M how come these Bruce trees are 4x4 these Bruce trees so you know what staircase if you're wondering why we're building a staircase instead of finishing the game staircase oh [ __ ] now Ben did just die but instead of restarting staircase Steven was also building a competing wood staircase next to our bubble cobby Stone staircase which resulted in predictable Shenanigans we need to hit Steven off the edge you're going to have to make the jump across and hit him two wait are we yet wait Ben then made the regrettable mistake of looking at an Enderman oh let's go it's so chill up here it's just playing like the the music uh Chill real chill like the music uh chill a mar want me to I can jum save me save me save me save bro oh my [ __ ] god and okay that's enough day one was over we got our furthest on our first attempt and for all the rest we died in under 10 minutes our highest Milestone was reaching the nether sort of this was definitely all right well harder than I thought it would be and so we move on to day two day two did not start off well attempt 8 a swamp spawn we found this cool Sandy Mountain thing did a bit of quarrying and collectively decided this place sucks I think we have to migrate guys it was time to find promising new land and before you knew it on the horizon was promising new land then upon seeing our promising new land had this to say this is promising new land however fact Checkers would later state that this land was not promising we continued and before we knew it promising new land so of course wood check tools check cave check did you guys [ __ ] hear that did you guys hear that it sounds like somebody's breaking in yeser bias someone was breaking in into B oh [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] huh attempt nine guess what another swamp spawn no oh no no no no no no no no no killing killing St where [ __ ] killing so once again wood check tools check but now Quarry time Ste M yourself [Music] him who keeps hiccuping me it's the hiccup n oh my God the hiccup n's in the server at the bottom of our tunnel we had found this funky underwater cave in which we utilized the door method once again well most of us used it everyone except for my friend Simon attempt 10 not a swamp spawn immediately we had good vibes from this one I'm getting good vibes from this Martin I'm getting good vibes from this we had spawn next to a village which is always a good thing you know what else is a good thing 8 hours of sleep and we are a bunch of sleepy boys I've got three beds guys sh died oh sh died now we all pointed and laugh like damn Sheamus you must suck everyone knows you don't just punch a Golem well that's what we all thought but upon reviewing the replay footage the truth was [Music] [Applause] revealed attempt 11 nothing of Interest happened very boring I got lost for like 10 minutes Med then Sydney died to a zombie way off screen attemp 12 a Mesa spawn you know what I don't like Mesa spawns Tobi fist fight yep attempt 13 trying to slow things down I decided to build a nice house right under this house the boys had found an iron vein and collected about 600 iron I'll be honest I got quite invested in this world we had a house a lot of resources lots of food but then Tristan entered the Nether on his own why would you do this Tristan you know I'm making a video right like if you just die in the Nether and then we have to restart and I get zero footage from it just just why oh my God why why attempt 14 a good classic Forest SW I could just tell in this world big things were on the way twice I'll agre I'm getting Whimsical vibes from this so of course we completed our checklist wood check tools check Stone check Martin I can quit mining stone at any time I swear I swe this big hill thing had a bunch of iron on it so we collected it and turned it into armor amazingly it had been 10 minutes and no one had died yet the main group had split into a few smaller groups some of whom had gone down mining so I took the guys I was with and ventured down into the caves to find them down in the caves we didn't find them but we did find this deep dark deep dark biomes are kind of spooky oh [ __ ] I got blindness make a sound and they'll hear and if one of these guys shrieks a few too many [Music] times well we'll leave that for later this particular deep dark biome we navigated around as carefully as possible making sure not to trip any oh no um making sure not to trip any shers we then found some of the other guys and we're like and turned around and left on the surface things had come along nicely I would have loved to express this but I uh didn't into the the [ __ ] um with the the uh well yeah um de that one the uh well the anyway Sydney came back from the mines with a good Bounty of obsidian so he built a portal and all went [Music] [Applause] through now believe me I did not want to be here the ne is full of these guys and these guys and worst of all these guys one wrong move by anyone one and all of our progress would be lost we were here for blaze rods and to find blaze rods we'd have to find a fortress so first things first let's walk around in circles for 20 minutes and get lost guys I think we're lost we nearly fell a few times oh my God but managed to find ourselves a warped Forest oh okay this is a good this's a good spot for killing Enderman actually yes Mt it is a good spot for killing lots of Enderman like this horrible sound we got one that's it that's okay we have enough end pearls let's get those blaz rods we still hadn't found that nether fortress which called for walking around in circles for another 20 minutes so we walked around in circles for another 20 minutes I found a fortress you found a Fortress Found A Fortress Yeah right and would you look at that a fortress nice to get this far it had taken us literally all day and I was stressing the [ __ ] out on top of that it was getting late so we made our way back slowly and carefully to the nether portal almost dying a few times in the process and had a good old chill back in [Music] base Tobias the base Master had constructed quite the establishment a nice house some farmland and a little chapel There's a Zombie Pigman at the church guys inshah he's finding God the world was going great tomorrow we'd go to the stronghold and kill that Ender Dragon and so for the rest of the night we fished guys guys ow ow ow my arms are guys my arms are a cast I'm going to but it ain't Bren I'm going we need Minecraft Bud Lights [ __ ] just [ __ ] just doesn't feel normal without it it's not realistic ex I'm not [ __ ] Hammer at [ __ ] 1:00 on Monday chill look at us down there having a good old time just fishing talking [ __ ] all is well too well this right here is Steven a bit of a prankster a jokester and he's come up with an epic prank if you real someone in while you're above them it shoots them up in the air very funny Steven but Steven be careful that's quite high up it would sure be an awful awful shame [Music] if [Music] no are you oh my [Music] god attempt 15 Ben beat up Steven that was the attempt and uh we ended the day on that note well we got further than day one but not by much well day three here we come day three started much the same as day two with plenty of abject failures it seemed to me that getting a good run going was exceptionally difficult from sneaky creepers to surprise holes to Tristan's TNT and Steven's rather unfortunate prank things were looking [Music] grim [Music] yeah [Music] and with that day four attempt 20 n at this point we were feeling a little spent if we didn't win soon everyone was going to lose interest attempt 29 was our first ever Jungle spawn jungle beats hard at me well I think you know the drill by now next to our jungle spawn was a vast desert which we decided would be a great spot for our base and even better next to this great spot was this cool cave so you know we did cave stuff for like half an hour ah it's safe enough oh no no it's not safe it's not safe go back once the cave stuff had been completed I dug to the surface and searched our base again it didn't take long to find it because of these follow the TNT [ __ ] back at base my friend sassy had found this most curious Contraption oh my God he fell for the oldest trick in the book and what do you know it was nether time this time my nether team was smaller and more experienced Nick had even brought his parrot this parrot really [ __ ] chill our spawn in the nether uh sucked but once we dug our way out we found this open area and we found this Bastion Now cast your mind back for me real quick remember how I was brutally assaulted by piglins during our practice runs well yeah that was inside a Bastion and the assaulters were These Guys these guys are not normal piglins they're piglin brutes naturally I wanted nothing to do with this place there was a wared forest right next to the Bastion so while we murdered Ender for their pearls we just looked at it h H maybe there was something cool inside perhaps I got a good feeling there's a looting sword in that other chest now sure I wasn't that Keen on going in but look exposed chest surely we could get something from it what's the point of killing the dragon if you're not even going to do it with some Tims on man you know what Sydney you're right what is the point of killing a dragon without Tims we chose this chest as our Target snuck on up to it and busted it open Sydney was in fact rewarded with Tims in the form of a fortune 3 pickaxe nice once we collected our pearls and poked the Bastion a bit more it was Fortress time now the Fortress itself sure it's dangerous but the journey to get to the Fortress was Far dangerous small holes everywhere narrow passages over Lava Lakes this horrible Basalt biome and sadly for Nick his parrot was not up to the challenge oh no oh Noir died aimlessly searching around in the nether is never a fun experience luckily it didn't take that long for me to spot the corner of a nether fortress way off in the distance guys I found a nether fortress reaching it was extremely treacherous oh my God how close I was just then but once we got there collecting the blaze rods was simple and easy oh that's it that's all we need I have six and with that our nether travels were over Sydney had brought enough obsidian for a backup portal which he built and we all went on through we had traveled a fair distance in the nether so our Overworld portal plunked us a good 3,000 blocks away from base in a cave a good 3,000 blocks that we of course traveled on our travels Sydney found a goat horn Nick found the sick horse and I was stressing the [ __ ] out could this be it we had reached this point before and you know Steven had done his thing this time I wasn't taking any chances everyone would be as stacked as possible I made some preparations the others got their supplies together and our 12 strong group set out to find the stronghold at night with Mobs everywhere just getting to the stronghold was quite the journey and on that journey I was getting more stressed and more stressed and more stressed if a single person pulled a silly one on us all of this work would be for nothing we maneuvered over the mountains raced along the rivers and before we knew it the ender eyes were pointing backwards holy [ __ ] was this it after 29 attempts we could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel once I was certain we were in the right spot we dug a staircase down and what do you know we were here I could taste victory and after a few minutes of searching we found the portal room but we still weren't ready I wanted everyone to have Enchanted gear and strongholds have libraries fill with bookcases ideal for enchanting so we set off to find the library and this is where it all came apart you see we had made the crucial mistake of leaving the portal room unguarded only for about a minute but that's all it took now sure you might say what do you mean unguarded Tristan and Steven are right there to deal with any threats no Tristan and Steven were not dealing with any threats Tristan and Steven are are the threats when I came back into the portal room there was a lot of very suspicious giggling and a mysterious button in the ceiling lots of giggling and a mysterious ceiling button pressing this button seemed like a really bad idea this deductive reasoning however eluded a particular member of our group [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] day five as the sun set on our fourth day our weary bodies and shattered Souls bore the weight of countless failures our eyes once filled with determination now reflect the scars of disappointment the wounds of defeat etch them Mark blah blah blah blah blah anyway today was day five and we had reached a tempt 30 we began attempt 30 marooned in the middle of this vast desert an entire world of sand seeing as there weren't any trees we had no choice but to pick a direction at random and start walking oh my God 10 seconds of walking later a village appeared on the horizon with extreme efficiency we ransacked all their houses stole all their beds beat their own Golem to death and left refusing to elaborate any further this Village uh sucked so we headed off deeper into the Sandy Abyss in search of supplies roughly 5 minutes of searching later we found an oasis and another Village these fellas had clearly spent their entire lives working the Farms amassing themselves an impressive supply of wheat naturally we stole all of their wheat and I stole a dead Bush Cactus clay dead guys I have a dead bush in my inventory stay mad I have a rare item as night time rolled in bringing with it this incredible Aurora we stuck down our pord beds and had a wonderful night's sleep Nick had gone off on some travels and discovered a third Village in the desert so of course we traveled to the third Village in the desert oh Sydney you want to see this cool trick yeah yeah throw your pickaxe on the cactus and it turns into a diamond pickaxe don't do it seems just not at the village is he he just [ __ ] wait what happened to it this Village had a good vibe to it I like the cut of its jib so we bestowed upon it our greatest honor of stealing everything kicking out the villages and living there ourselves we chose this wonderful Tower as our headquarters and expanded the top of it to accommodate our needs like a uh Cactus it's really big but I almost died oh my God okay we had a base now to the mines Beneath The Village was a network of flooded caves rich in iron coal lapis and glow squids once again our trusty doors made themselves immensely useful deeper into the cave we got iron got diamonds and got obsidian well that's enough mining back to base back at base we got straight to it built a nether portal and went on through much like our big desert biome in the Overworld our nether portal spawned Us near our nether portal spawned Us near a huge Basalt Delta resulting in one of the coolest Nethers I've ever seen so we got to work I chose a direction and we started traversing over the bassal it was definitely cool looking but traversing over it was dangerous and a huge pain luckily the Fortress was very close once we'd reached our Blaze Rod Qua we traversed back over the basalt and to the Warped forest for our mandatory Pearl farming session this time we remembered the boat method what is the boat method this okay the [ __ ] idiot absolute fool if someone's trying to attack you you just throw a boat down and then they they get stuck in the boat they're like oh simply just throw a canoe at them once we had thrown sufficient canoes at the local Enderman population and fulfilled our Pearl quer it was time for a graceful exit well as graceful as one could be while being chased by a mob of pissed offi pit courtesy of Sydney's questionable diplomatic abilities all right jents it's showtime back at base zero Dilly ding took place well except for placing all this glowstone for some reason we collected our things and before we knew it it was stronghold time I through the first Ender eye and we set off the desert was big but we reached the end of it pretty quickly which gave way to a warm ocean it floor covered in Sea pickles look at all those sea pickles down there man honestly just oh I'm [ __ ] I fend for a sea pickle right now we traveled the Seas through forests and jungles leaving a a mark and before we knew it the eyes were pointing down straight down it was time we tunnel down found the stronghold found the portal room and found the library for enchanting our items before jumping in I gave the boys a arousing speech all right the hype speech is this Ender Dragon we're going to beat its ass he's a [ __ ] putrid dog bro place the eyes into the portal and we jumped on through our strategy was simple water lots and lots of water yeah he's coming down he's coming he's coming down he's coming down where do we go do we go in the middle here get out watch out from the dragon watch out oh my God oh my [Music] God hit his [Music] ass where are you [Music] guys a what what what [Music] [ __ ]

Channel: martincitopants

Views: 5,138,725

Keywords: martincitopants, martin, from the depths, factorio, KSP, kerbal, arma, arma 3, Battlefield 4, Tier list, Battlefield 6, just cause, minecraft, elon musk, gaming, dream

Id: CYBdxuGj0X4

Length: 34min 46sec (2086 seconds)

Published: Fri May 26 2023