Triple T

been my substitute day is triple-t triple-t I want to talk about three things that begin with the world we're at tea I want to talk about managing temptations managing triggers and managing treasures temptation triggers and treasures temptations a temptation is an enticement to do something that I should not do can you relate you ever been tempted yeah this temptation is an enticement to do something that I should not do to say something that I shouldn't I say anybody ever tempted you they say something made you you you bother give it to homo almost cut everybody out in here that's called a temptation your children can do that to you if you got a little key into somewhere sibling amen won't it won't it won't it won't they do it I mean you just you just you don't know what else to do but just say just say words that were just you want to say it you want them to bounce off the walls and but you didn't praise God sometimes you don't and you make it and but what I want you to understand about temptation let's look at James chapter 1 beginning in verse 12 and it says something interesting about temptation as difficult as temptation is and temptation becomes more difficult when you're saved because now there are certain standards that we're to operate in there's certain boundaries that exist for us as believers they kind of narrow the window of what is okay and what is not it's now what used to be gray is like it's like really black and white like you're really not supposed to cheat on your taxes and you pose the love people and you're not supposed to have sex if you're not married well I slide that in there and so now like it's like it's like this Lane can be very troublesome and it can get exhausting trying to avoid temptation because you know we live in a world it doesn't necessarily follow the rules that were following right so here's the good news about temptation James 1:12 says that God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation in afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love them like there are blessings and rewards that come from enduring temptation it's not a pleasant thing it's not a nice thing but there are rewards that come with it and the reason why that's the case and the reason why I should be encouraging to us is because temptation can really wear you out if you fight in temptation it's like exhausting like to keep fighting when people around you aren't fighting like just I'm tired of fighting I'm tired of trying to do the right thing I'm time exhausted but the blessing is if we endure temptation the Bible says God blesses those who do that Andy rewards us which is pushes very powerful because I believe the temptation is a revelation towards your elevation I just want to sound like Jesse Jackson for a minute just but it really is it reveals where you're headed if you look at temptation in this way that every time I am tempted it is giving me a glimpse of where I'm going and that if I fail the temptation at this level how can I expect to go to the next level because because what I'm tipping on is this level is revealing to me what I'm gonna have to deal with on the next level but as you pass temptation if as you continue to endure temptation successfully gawking and trust you or more like why entrust me with more I entrust me with promotion and prosperity and bigger responsibilities and more opportunities and and what why even give me my dreams when my dreams come with temptations if I can't handle temptations when I haven't when I don't even have my dreams when I'm well making sense so so one of the things is because there's a no hem to say is yield not to temptation for yielding is sin but each victory will aid you some other to win it's like every time we win a temptation it empowers us to win the next one and I'll tell you later why you why you and I are tempted around the same thing over and over again you ever noticed that it's really it's not a whole lot of stuff to tempt us but there's one thing they dead that's the one and how you trembling your knees shaking trembling here's another thing what you're saying about temptation as we teach through this and that is the fact the temptation is not a sin it is not a sin to be tempted and sometimes that's that's how we feel as Christians we just upset with ourselves because we felt like Senate like how do I keep thinking that way I shouldn't be thinking like that I shouldn't even have those kind of thoughts I shouldn't even have those kind of desires this is like I'm this is like I'm getting nice while he's in the other it's just water so so if you beat yourself up just because you had a thought that's not accurate temptation does not start with the thought it is not a sin to be tempted it is human to be tempted by the way God doesn't tempt us look at verse 13 of James 1 it says always remember this when you are being tempted do not say God is tempting me God has never attempted to do wrong and he never attempts anyone else so the natural inclination is if God's not tempting to me then it must be Satan then God tempted me Satan Satan coming out to me saying is all my tract that devil is busy but James doesn't say that James says it's not Satan and it's not God guess who it is mmm-hmm temptation comes from our own desires which entice us and drag us away it's something in us then watch this in the next verse and I don't know wise not these desires give birth to sinful actions and when sin is allowed to grow it gives birth to death so this is how this is how temptation works God doesn't tempt us and it's not always say neither the reason why temptation is possible is because there's something in me there is something in me that is magnetized as something outside of me that is inappropriate that I shouldn't do but it is something in that is attracted to something that I should not do or say you get that it starts with something in me in fact everybody needs to understand this the closest person to you want you to tell them look at them selling something wrong with me I really didn't want to tell you that passage is permeable now if they know you they already know that about you you didn't even surprise them I already know something wrong with you you have to encourage people see I know you think as I come to church ain't I'm wrong me I know you think is I know all the words of the songs of the church I named them wrong I know you think as I post stuff on social media about how much I love the Lord and I post spiritual stuff anything but I don't want you to get it twisted there's something wrong with me there's something wrong with me did not even my relationship with God has fixed I've been saved for logging and lobby we have been living I've been saying oh man I've been saved over 38 years in something's still wrong with me I've said I know I'm saying I know I'm saying like anybody here just know I know one thing I'm saying Amen I got battle went there as Jesus in my life got baptized got the right hand of fellowship then turn late across the hall to pray - Lord forgive me all that still something right something is wrong with us and it is what is wrong with us that makes us temp table but that's not sin it is when when the temptation leads to verse 15 send for action then it becomes sin so it is imperative to know when I cross the line so how do I avoid crossing the line here's number one here's the first thing I want you to keep in mind and several things one is always use God's escapes when he gives you one take God's escape if God gives you escape just take it take it as grace first Corinthians says whenever we attempted this he always makes a way of escape he always makes a way of escape we just don't pay attention to it if somebody says to you hey you won't go to gang and you know that during the game you was gonna do something sinful then that's your way of escape alright I'll go to game I'm not saying go the game is more enticing you're more exciting than what you were planning I'm just saying there's an escape take the escape somebody says can you watch can you watch your little nephew for me you know you don't like your nephew but that ain't the point for the time they need you to watch the nephew it's time you was get ready do something sinful so Nast becoming this kid you ain't gotta like your nephew you just an escape right now someone watch you so I won't do what I was gonna do like take the way of it cuz they know I had other plans that's that's ignoring the escape the challenge where temptation is is not that God didn't provide a way of escape we just ignore it's like David it's a man named David King David in the Bible when he send the most popular send people know about him was with a lady named Bathsheba the way went down David was supposed to be at war he was not only the king of Israel but he was a leader in commander of the of the Israelite army he supposedly lead him in war he didn't go with him he sent everybody else to fight he stayed home he goes up on the roof of his palace and walks around the palace and he sees I don't think he was intending to see he notices a woman in her yard bathing outside and how to court you out of her yard it is warm enough for her to do it and David is captured by her by her nudity and her washing herself and this is the first porn movie in history he stands there and stares at a woman from his roof looking down into her yard to her washing her body now here's his first escape he should have said you know what let me I need to go to work let me just go and work get on this horse and going out there with the rest of the troops see one of your escapes is go to work stop calling out sick I know you like your job just it's an escape it's nine hours that you probably won't sin go to work well friends on where you work who you work with but for David he could not he didn't go to work instead he says find out who that is for me so he said his standard if I know is he comes escape one and he comes escape two and three they said Oh first of all she's one of your staff person's wives and she's one of your other staff versus daughter that's two more outs like oh well let me go home then we go into work sometimes the temptation is so strong you ignore every stop sign when you run red lights and stop signs that's a sign the temptation is overwhelmed us and here's the here's the blessing and the cursing of temptation the blessing of temptation is is that we don't always suffer consequences immediately when we sin that's the blessing but it's also a curse too because a lot of times because we don't feel the consequences of our sin we keep doing it it's like Ecclesiastes 8:11 says when people don't suffer punishment for their crimes they're bent on doing wrong it's like it's the it ain't sure we're people saying I got away with it so what you saying it's like people when you go fishing anybody that goes fishing me you try to catch a fish it's it's very deceptive because you have to make the fish think you're trying to help them I'm just trying to eat something eat really I'm trying to eat you you put the bait in the water in the fish oh here comes dinner every now and then maybe officials won't take the whole bait fish just just nibble on it take a little something off take a little piece of it and you feel it on your line but then it's gone I'm saying that's a fish that fish just hit the bait and left it I said it just hit it I said he just hit it and then he he quit it he walked he swam away and said I ain't catch nothing I ain't got to get penicillin for STD the condom work she takes her test says I didn't and the pregnancy test came out negative we good and so because I didn't have any consequences I'm gonna go hit it again you should see your faces if that fish neutered behind that bait was a hook and behind that hook was a line and behind that line was a pole and beside the pole was a real spending a real was a fat man behind the fat man was a frying pan it wouldn't even nibble somebody say look at somebody say is a trap it's all a trap here's what God wants for Christians what God wants us to experience is the anxiety that comes with pending consequences if you ever do something wrong you'd be like oh man this gonna mess me up it's gonna mess up my life is gonna mess up I blew it I blew it I'm gonna get caught all of that anxiety that's called a crisis that crisis is meant to purify us the pending consequences the ominous consequences that might come that crisis was intended to purify us so that we wouldn't do it again the problem is it's not that we don't have a crisis we get comfortable in the crisis we can come to a living like that oh man just missed it just misses just missing are you serious like that stress alone should make a stop but the pleasure the drug and the pleasure that we get from the sin overwhelms the the crisis that we get from the pending consequences do you understand what I'm saying so first of all always take God's escape here's the second thing you might want to try is take a nap I'm just trying to be practical take a nap sometimes you just need to go lay down right just go take your little nasty take cuz you can get some sinful ideas you know just get some like a good like just be thinking stuff like man that's war that's true just go take a nap go go just go to it because a lot of temptation comes when you're fatigued a lot of times we get tempted because we're tired we're tired of help and then when you help a lot of people let's say you're a caregiver and you provide care for somebody elderly or you're taking care of somebody or you take care of kids you taking something you can't give your kids or you take a simple case of my house keys you got day care or whatever it may be and after a long and you could be serving the Lord when you do something good publicly sometimes you want to reward yourself privately Nate am I gonna admit to it but it's the truth like really they that's that's the best that's the temptation of entitlement I deserve to be taken care of since I take care of so many people the problem is what we want to do to take care of ourselves can can lead to something that can kill us something that can kill our potential kill our future and so so taking a nap allows me a couple of hours maybe if I'm sleeping to avoid the temptation or what taking a nap can do is it can restore my energy so that I can fight again now let me give you a specific temptation the single people have single Christian people when Christian single people the temptation with Christian single people I believe is the temptation to hastily marry somebody you don't really know and the reason why there's such a temptation is because when you're saved and you're single the struggle with the flesh is so difficult sometimes see when you're when you're unsaved in you're single you can have sex live together ain't no prob like what we just we just made love you like it ain't no problem but were you save and you do that you feeling all guilty and then oh Lord I did it again please forgive us we want to live right we want to stop fall you can't worship right you don't feel you feel like your hands too dirty to put up so you just go like this and worship you don't feel like you can minister and serve and do what you're supposed to do you didn't even do what you're called to do because you feel so bad about what you've done that's a tough spot to be in when you're in a relationship so when you feel that way the temptation is well let's make this right we got to stop doing this let's make this right let's just go to the justice of the peace and make this right we can have a formal wedding later let's just go to Pastor maybe hear Marion's right out for the service or some just press it back he cool like Daniel practice open up that book and read it to us and just tell us man and wife right they're like we want to fix it fast because we don't want to keep feeling down about it and can anybody relate to what I'm saying we tell if you can't understand cuz you just flow with your sin what I'm saying if you're fighting the thing with the temptation now is is to marry somebody that I don't even really know and I really don't even really like them I really like this person but because I keep because I don't want to keep sinning and because I keep telling people God brought us together God brought us together or if I watch Oprah the univer waters together or the cosmos waters together or fate brought us together now I'm stuck in a relationship because I keep telling somebody that how this supernaturally happened how a coincidence that we would happen to meet like this and it was so special but the reality is I want to tell you something is real interesting I believe that if you're single you should get premarital level counseling while you're dating as opposed to when you get engaged now I know that sounds counterintuitive I'm saying even in courtship consider premarital counsel premarital level counseling while you're dating why would I do that why wouldn't I wait till I get engaged to get free marital counseling because when you get premarital counseling when you're engaged it's just something on a checklist you're really not listening to the therapist they just say just like blah blah blah you're just thinking about the wedding dress the gown it looks kind of tuxedo shoes we're coming with a bridesmaid gonna wear who's gonna be in who's gonna be out who's gonna sing what kind of song with a flower the photographer called you're thinking that the whole sound there were never ever say are y'all gonna do what I said of course we go you know we're gonna do what you say we we already do that don't we baby but we already do that so we're good we're good anything else it's just like you're just going through the motions you're plowing through because you don't want to be in sin anymore and you're so excited about the relationship but I want to give you a question that's counterintuitive I want everybody to consider this when you're in a dating relationship instead of always instead of focusing on what you emotionally love about a person I want you to focus on what you honestly hate about them I want you to focus on secretly in your mind there is something about that person you really don't like and I don't care who the person there is no human being alive that somebody don't like something about them and you'd be surprised at how many people get married already knowing that they don't like that of other person but getting married anyway because they ignore it and trust me 90% of the problems in their marriage is not anything new it's something they saw when they were dating but they ignored it and it will torment it you know what it annoys you why you're dating it'll torment you when you get married I mean everyone would torment you you'd be like I can't even get out of this I'm saying I want you to figure out what you hate about the person what is it that you I can't stand that I can't stand that and then here's the question can you live with that the rest of your life are you ready to live with that because you are I don't know why we think because they throw rice at us on a Saturday just gonna go away I'm saying can you live with that the rest of your life that's a very important thing now I said what is it that I really don't like ain't none of that stuff surprise you unless y'all got married the same day you met you saw something about the present everybody that's married is dealing with something that emerged I'll guarantee you you saw glimpses of it before you even got married if there was immaturity if there was irresponsibility if there was a spare body odor whatever it is you knew all of that before you got married don't even play with me and you ignored it because you didn't want to stay in sin you're a Christian you let a lord and the universe what y'all together that's why you did it now I'm saying the reason why you should care because here's the deal let me say what it's true if you break up a relationship when you're dating that's hard it's going to hurt but it is not nearly as painful as breaking up an engagement if you're gonna break it up break it up early break it up break it up break it up break it up you know why it's so hard to break up these engagements because it's so fake now when I was getting engaged 30-some years ago you're just in the privacy of your home you got the underneath you answer prayers then you got any extra person now y'all slice that thing up so much y'all on social media is filmed and everything you posted it I said yes he posted she said yes it's balloons everywhere he come down in a helicopter you got these helicopter engagements and tricycle marriages he did all that to get you ain't doing nothing to keep you I'm telling you the real deal it's hypocritical so then everybody know your business because you take pictures all the time with your ring now you just find a way to put your ring in the picture you just try and do something with your yoni and we take a picture you or a ring it's hard to break an engagement because it's so public and it should be but but even breaking an engagement now you now he wants this ring back because he really couldn't afford it he just got tired of fornicate you want to keep the ring to make him pay for it but as hard as it is to break an engagement it is even more much more harder to break up a marriage because around here you got to be separated for a year before the course got the nerve to say how long y'all been separated are y'all still having sex they go ask that if you slip it around you have a secretary down there now they will they won't they will ask questions about that then you got to go in a courtroom and get a divorce in front of people it ain't like you're gonna get your own little room they gonna have here in front de sá Keisha what'd he do wrong he went right here that nasty disrespectful you gotta say all that front all these people that's hard Sharon assets who gonna get the car who will get the house your credit was bad we wouldn't got the house if it was just everyone during my night all that all that stuff you've been everything breaking up a barrier table how about breaking up a marriage with kids now we got custody battles who go have them in the summer who go ham on the weekends what school they gonna go through where we gonna celebrate Christmas we don't have your new boyfriend saying nothing to my son and no hair your new chick saying done to my daughter I don't want to run their ex problem baby mama drama all that stuff going on I'm saying when you got to deal with all that you need to find my way up here if i'ma go through all that I need to know I'm about to marry you I don't even like you now what I didn't say to y'all who try to twist this don't go back and say pastor said we shouldn't stay married because I realized I never did like you I ain't say that I ain't even talking to married people I'm talking to single people trying to save some trouble if you already married you got to stay married you got to learn to love what you don't like be committed that's what I see it I gotta check that first I literally got a text saying somebody you know you know that means that means that I says I made a mistake I get to get I ain't say none of that clarification let me go on the triggers look who stopped laughing you just do you own the best like this just smiles or the whole thing just smile hey that's good stuff let's talk about managing triggers a trigger is by definition a replica of a reality it is something that emotionally reminds you of a time that you were in before when it comes to temptation a trigger is like this it can mean it's a it's a trigger is a is a temptation to go back to a sinful habit that you used to act in for example let's say you stop drinking II like man I ain't drinking no money handle drinks I'm doing good I'm sober and then and then you go to a game with somebody and they're in this suite and a number beer everywhere and I mean it's free here like you see you see the surge as they pour it the surge is talking to you Steve Steve scream a you've been doing good like like I'm saying and you're like hey anything I wrote here was somewhere I can't even just roll out I'm riding with somebody that's a trigger you understand what I'm saying now now you're tempted to go back to a simple habit that's a trigger y'all understand is rigor that's not the kind of trigger I want to teach you about though what I want to teach you today about is when you're in a relationship and a person triggers you not back to a sinful place but they trigger you and take you back to a hurtful place something triggers you and it reminds you of how they once hurt you too comprende how do you handle that how do you handle a trigger to takes you back to a place of brokenness a place of hurt or paints a place of pain what do you do first of all let me explain your trigger a trigger by its nature masquerades itself as if it's a reality but it's actually a replica of reality it's like it's it's your emotional personal don't beat yourself up when you get triggered it's your emotional memory trying to protect you emotional memory will try to protect you and say don't walk in here remember what happened last time remember what he did before remember how she betrayed you before remember how what you found in her phone before like it's it's just from it's like oh you hide your phone again now you're triggered yonezawa saying y'all here how do you handle that first of all understand there was something called the Goodyear blimp that became public popular back in the 70s it was fly over football games there's a huge thing 192 feet long 60 feet wide 58 feet deep you can see 10 people in it and it's a Goodyear blimp is 21 million dollars where you can get a replica of that for $15 on Amazon it's 33 inches you can blow it up and hold it like this it's not the real thing it's a replica what I'm saying is a trip a trigger is not real as a replica it makes you think you're back where you were because emotional memory emotional pain is always now even if you could have got raped 28 years ago but when it comes back it's now I feel it now and I go into defense mode now so what do you do when your trigger light in fact if you're in a relationship with somebody and they're doing good one minute they're emotionally well they're they're upbeat and all of a sudden they just go down they start acting funny acting withdraw withdrawn I can a little agitate it what I'm saying is they may have been triggered so what do you do I want you to write down these six things these are six things the Lord gave me to show you show us how to get out of a trigger and triggers are not masculine or feminine men get triggered just as well as women what do you do you get triggered because here's the deal reason why you need to write this down because you never know when you're gonna need them because triggers are unexpected you can't plan for them you don't know when they're gonna come they hit you out of nowhere you're doing good while money and then you hear some smell something sense something and you're right back we Rebecca its back the reason why that happens y'all is because of trauma you cannot have trauma without having triggers in 2010 I had a trauma trauma that I had was I had a pulmonary embolism I had a blood clot in my lung I almost died it was a Tuesday night I was in I was in the hospital in was gonna put those up yet please don't don't share two points yet you're going too fast I was in the hospital and Holy Cross Hospital I don't want it up because I ain't sure yet but also I want people right in the head I'm in Holy Cross hospitals a Tuesday night and I'm hooked up to oxygen because my lung had collapsed and but but when you when you have oxygen support you're breathing comfortably I didn't know how much I needed it so I'm saying I gotta go to the bathroom and the bathroom between my bed is probably about seven steps something I know I can go to bathroom so I unhooked the oxygen put my feet on the floor and tried to stand up and couldn't breathe I'm panicked so much trying to catch my breath I couldn't find the thing to put it back on my face so I'm sitting there and nobody's in right when you can't breathe you can't talk so the guy with his curtain closed say you are right over there but I couldn't say anything so the later dip-dye was my near-death experience a lady walked in just happened to walk in and saw me and freaked out and scream and ran and got help she just walked in that was just timing god so they retook me to the oxygen but because that traumatized me every time I go up steps if I'm short of breath I'll be like its back it's not bad that's a replica I just think it's back it's not the real thing but I'll go survivor scan me take me to Mercy room right now and do a CT scan right now scan me John I feel everything being its back well they have to scan me because I had it before what I'm selling tell you is whatever traumatized you will always it's like a trimmer when you go through an earthquake they're trimmers that will always follow it so the first thing you do when you're when you're triggered is you share with the person who triggered you you're in a relationship you say hey that triggered me it took me back to how you once hurt me now now you can put it up and then which is which what you do is if they do that's my new word love offer that's just if they listen to you and they understand you and they validate you and say you know what that makes sense that you feel that way and they apologize and say I'm sorry I'm really sorry that that I caused you that kind of pain and they ask for forgiveness they say you know what okay if you can find it in your heart to forgive me I know I've asked you to forgive me before but I hope you'll forgive me and then they make amendments and you know is there anything you'd like for me to do to help make this better for you see what you have to understand when somebody gets triggered they're not doing that on purpose when you say by the way if you reach out to somebody and they don't do that and they say we're triggered what about when you trigger me stop the conversation right then when they start saying hey I know what it's like because I've been there stop become insane because what you're not about to do is make me feel worst I'm already feeling bad because you triggered me they ain't bout to flip it on me never mind I'm good see what that reveals is is that now you've been triggered by somebody who's not gonna help you climb out of it because it's like spiraling down into a hole do y'all listen I got checking do y'all understand what I'm saying talk to me I know y'all ain't churchy people but Aaron and you guys say something I don't know if y'all understanding me so say well come on or do like this give me something son because I'm y'all y'all confusing me do y'all understand what I'm saying now so when you're spiraling like that and you reach out and say that triggered me and they they want to get defensive right then stop the conversation now how do you get out of it when the person who triggers you not gonna help you second thing you do is you grieve give yourself the right to grieve it was real pain it's a real past and it was real hurtful you deserve to grieve it don't rebuke it because it ain't going nowhere it's a part of your history it's a part of your psychological history you have to grieve it how do you grieve it faster you you you you think about what you lost man I lost so much time through that I lost peace of mind almost lost my mind I lost my self-worth in that I lost my trust in you I lost my hope I lost my dreams I lost opportunities I lost something precious to me you talk about everything and just and just let it hurt stay with the hurt how long do you stay with the her you stay with the hurt till you can move to the next thing and that is what I call differentiation this as soon as you can differentiate this is a very important thing now you shouldn't be in this for two weeks or three weeks or months maybe an hour - if your focus let it hurt let it hurt let it hurt get alone get away that's why somebody says call it love afar when I wrote that word I somebody send me on Twitter love afar because you got to separate yourself with a person hurt you so you can work through this once you get to a place where you can do the third step which differentiate differentiate means this because triggers make you think that what you're feeling is real right now you have to do something in your brain to say that was then this is different this is not that I'm not having another pulmonary embolism right now it just reminded me of it I'm just short of breath because I'm out of shape that's different or this is bad but it's not that this young Saturday you have to do because in your mind see the emotional pain doesn't have a calendar or a clock it just feels like it's all a capital N Oh W it all feels like right now so I have to differentiate in my mind that's not right now that's not my reality then the next thing you do is appreciate I appreciate the fact that even though my life is not perfect and this relationship is not perfect it's not like it used to be it is better than it was and I appreciate the fact that this pain that I'm having has actually prepared me to be a blessing to other people that if my pain is not in vain then the next thing you do is as you climb out of this spiral of being triggered which leaves the depression actually triggering can make you depressed is you start giving yourself this affirmation you say this I didn't deserve to be treated that way I'm grateful that I'm not being treated that way now and I felt that trigger as big as I did because the trauma makes me feel things big you affirm yourself I feel that way because of my history it's not something wrong with me that's why you got see when you're interracial somebody and and they have a trigger or they go into a back place it's wrong for you to say why you got to keep going in the past why you keep bringing stuff up you think somebody really wants to do that you think somebody walk around say I can't wait to get triggered boy imma get trigger today and lay it on you trigger being triggered hurts anybody crazy like that is waiting I'm can't wait to bring up the pass no you don't know when it's going to hit you you got to be skilled enough to help walk the person out especially when you're responsible for what's triggering them you caused the trauma and you caused the trigger how you get to be innocent Buddha some good stuff whoo I'm gonna check in again you know what I'm good I mean I can do that churchy stuff and say any all right and anything good come on touch your neighbor and say neighbor I can do that kind of stuff that's that's what I gotta do but if y'all appreciate this every night and I need to know you're listening and you're connected because cuz it makes perfect sense to me then maybe I shouldn't even worry about you saying I just need to know you still a cuz if cardi B wasn't here you'd be saying don't take a bad girl don't take you back [Music] No yeah what point was our [Music] huh affirm yourself last thing you do is you you carefully reengaged with the person you carefully reengage see the trigger was not meant to annihilate the relationship or bring a permanent separation it's just your emotional memory intact protecting you and once you come out of the spiral and you affirm yourself and you said this is not that this is a replica this is not reality see where the trigger does it makes you not trust the person you go into fear like I don't want to get you you're not gonna get me again and they may have really changed they may not be perfect but they may have really changed they may have make them made amendments but you reengaged carefully see you may not be able to go out and have a date and have a conversation across the table from each other because it's too tense I think when I tell couples you need to go out on a date they think they need to go sit down and have dinner each other not if you're not of his tense between you yeah go talk there's gonna be an argument go somewhere that's neutral like go to a concert and enjoy a concert together where somebody's communicating to you go to a movie where something is communicating to you go to a stage play when something's communicating you go out in a group you know the energy in a group you go out with three or four couples now you can communicate to each other through other people that's the safe way of reconnecting you have to be wise in the reconnecting you understand I'm saying all right let me finalize this I'm gonna talk about managing your treasure and I'm done I'm gonna use the world of sports I'm using football as an analogy football in football they're three parts to a football game there's offense there's defense and what's the third thing special teams offense defensive well act like you know special teams in the world of finances making money is offense saving money is defense tithing is special teams why do I say that no game starts without special teams you can't start a football game without special teams and you can't start a half without special teams your money should always always start with God I make no apology for it should always start with God let me say some that's the one thing that's worked for me since I was fifteen years old I've been tired ain't out of manage money but he just kept blessing me that's that's you always start with God a tithe is ten percent you take ten percent I've been doing this about 15 years old I take 10% of everything I earn and I give it to God's work it's always worked I can't anyway offense is income accumulation making money that's income accumulation but defense is wealth preservation that's not the same income and wealth are not the same thing income is what you make wealth is what you keep you just some of you are great offensively you are a high income producer but if you never learn how to play defense you'll always be vulnerable in the world of finances it's called exposure right Martin it's called exposure you're exposed I work professional athletes they're professional athletes who have made millions of dollars in their life and now they've been so exposed as they play no defense a living in poverty how do you do that it's because you can start shopping at Kmart and Target and shoppers and then start shopping in and-and-and-and Whole Foods and in Prada and whatever else because all of your expenses go up with your income so you play great offense but you don't play any defense so you always bjo be just over broke because it doesn't matter how great your offense is if you're not playing defense you'll always be vulnerable that's why people have made you're making more money than you've ever made and you're as vulnerable as you've ever been one catastrophe will take you down just like it would've taken you down seven years ago when you're making half of what you make now it's because you can take bad behavior to every level of finances with you do you understand that so I want three people I'm going to illustrate this and I'm done I need three people who would confess be honest and say pastor I got a problem with saving money I do not do a good job of saving money I just need three people I see some mining back is that is in the back I can't really see too far but I I wanna oh if you if you raise your hand I want I want at least one guy to come up here so so two ladies if we gotta be ladies and guys I need a guy I had already seen three ladies that's a problem so what do y'all got to stop so a brother can come he's just gonna be gangsta incoming all right come on bro [Music] all right thank you all for coming up here appreciate it you're good you stay right there face me you stay beside her face me step up next to him facing me you come over here it is what's your name mark you got job my man you married man you a prospect right now you got a job any single good job check him out after service which is how did I reach you I'm just joking he employed you got all his teeth his pants was pulled up shoes and belt matches he bother going through a sweat he's now gonna do that to eat chocolate look at him got his pretzel mock was his last name so I can google him real quick now one of y'all gotta be God when he gotta be the bank God order Bank you don't want to be God you got you got a new guy was black you're the bank here's what I want to tell you man mark I got an idea I got an enterprise for you you know how much you make I ain't gonna ask you for no mister me I want you to get it you could pay how do you get paid every other week that's pretty much how it goes for this illustration because I'm not that smart you gonna have to get paid every week for this illustration so just cut whatever you get every two weeks in half I need you to keep that in mind what would you get every week if you got paid just get that number in your head all right it's in this envelope it's magic I got exactly what you make every week in here you believe that it's not true I'm lying about something then I want you also getting mine what you make annually at the India all right you got that what I want to do is I want to show you something that if you do this enterprise you start this business in in 10 weeks if you do it I'm telling you every time every time you give Ava ten weeks you will have one paycheck sitting in her bank once you switch cuz I need God over here I need God closer to people so that's the bank that's God right now remember when you get paid that's offense right when you give to God that special teams when you put money in the bank that's defense what I want to talk to you about is I have a plan if you do this in probably in a year you'll have ten percent of your entire annual salary in her bank in five years you would have accumulated half of what you make in your salary annual salary that whatever that number is it could be a half a million dollars you have a quarter of a million dollars in her bank if you do what I'm gonna tell you in 10 years you'll have your entire salary in her bank sitting there to use as your discretion if you do what I'm telling you but here's a good thing about this enterprise you don't work you don't have to spend extra hours burn the midnight oil go to that job after this job other people work for you in fact you don't do a thing create a system for it this is how it works when you get paid because of your offense you're going to get paid on this job $100 because that's all I got this is $100 every time you get paid every week you won't get $100 now a tithe is how much 10% that's what you get a god and I want you to also tithe into the bank once you get another 10% to the bank and then you keep 80 percent so how much did you keep don't do that from these people man you don't you do that in front of these people man I had you up here you just went down three levels some lady saying but I'll teach them how to count I don't need them not account I'll teach you math then what I'm giving you that is not yours to keep this is an illustration that's my money this here this is my money I'm using this so you won't break that up but what you want to do is what I want you to do is I want you to imagine you just got paid you just got that's your offense you got a great offense I want you to play defense and special teams not in that order right now on what you just got you just got $100 I want you play special teams first now that's God's wished on you God and that's the bank you good that's ten and ten all right great you did good you did good now Knight Rogers you can't just do it one time every time you get paid play special teams take care of God first because he made it all possible then you make sure you put some of your bankers you got to play defense do it again stay right there just pays you again you got paid again do it again do it again got paid again do it again every time you get paid you pay God you pay the bank you pay God you pay yourself you pay God you're investing yourself keep doing it you're gonna do it give him give him speeded up a little bit I want you to do it that is to you to get down to the ones now what he's doing is he just did that ten times now let me explain step back over here let me explain what just happened if you do what I said ten times a full paycheck will be in that Bank I don't care what you make if you make $5,000 a pay period it'll be in that Bank if you do what I say it I'm some up cuz you came a picture to save some money that doesn't save money well I'm saying I can get you a whole paycheck in the bank sitting in the bank if you do that ten times if you do it for a whole year you have over five paychecks in under money that's pretty good when you don't have to ask other people money cuz you got it sitting because play defense not just offense right man that makes sense because what will happen is let me tell you what will happen miss banker right here is this all hair this outfit I thought that was okay got you now it's the last service anything might come out now because you played good defense and you invested in her bank what are you gonna do for him what you gonna give him no you don't give it back to them you hold his money and because it's a bank you're gonna play defense for him it's FDIC insured right it's a Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation we'll make sure up to two hundred thousand dollars here Mike your money's protected so she playing defense protecting your money but y'all don't play offense you're gonna give you a little dividend on it give them a little interest on it ain't gonna be a lot but she's gonna add to your paycheck every ten weeks you get a paycheck put a little money on it right got it that's what she does at the bank then most people get that because you get a bank statement and see look my money's growing I get that now here's the key you get to keep if you did that you get to keep eight hundred eighty percent of what you made you live off of that that should be enough to live off of but if you tell me I can't pay my bills because I paid God and I paid myself if you can't do that because I said I can't play I can't pay my bills cuz I play special teams defense then that means you have too many bills it means you may have to drive something different maybe deliver something smaller you made to make some adjustments but you cannot keep living without playing defense and special teams because it's gonna mess you up in the long run right now you can understand how this works as you see it in pay statement but how do I know if what I'm giving to God works hi know preachers ain't getting it and getting Cadillacs and Jheri curls and just don't have enough air to get a drinker okay like how do how do I know that's working I can see that this is working how do I know that's working you find out that's working through his promises in Malachi chapter 3 this what God says God says bring the whole tithe verse 10 into the storehouse let's stop right there first of all the whole time the whole tithe means there is not just 10% if you make a thousand dollars in a papery but you only bring home four hundred thirty forty three dollars is not a time the whole time there's a hundred dollars you give a whole tithe on your whole income that's how you give it you get a whole time on what the government is taxing you on which your bills are paid out of that's a whole time that's you're wet stop asking for a full blessing and you keep giving up a partial tithe I'm saying that y'all god bless you touch your neighbor we're bringing the whole time we're into the storehouse the storehouse was the temple of that time it's where the priests and the Levites were workers that's how they were compensating priests in the Old Testament our pastors today Levites in the Old Testaments are musicians today that's how they were staffed and funded so there's no secret that the that the budget and the finances of the church are paid for by the tithes and offerings of people who love God and who put them versing their money that's how that works why bring all the time to show house why Lord so that they'll be meet in my house there'll be food in my house what does that mean that means all the resources of the local church I met through the giving of people we don't have to do car washes fish fries and all that people tithe and they give money to the church and that's how the church financial needs are met let me just for full disclosure tell you some of the things that we've been able to do because you give tithes and gives offerings one because of your tithes and offerings Zion Church this year we'll have invested over $1,000,000 in missions outreach benevolence and key helping poor people in Kenya Dominican Republic Haiti and other missionaries all around the world not to mention all the people we were help right here in the DMV because of tithes and offerings that's not just what we do on Wow moments when we get people cars and we give people trips and we give people who support like that that comes out of our operating expense I'm talking about 10% of our money goes right back in the mission staffing people helping people touch the world all over the world that's the reason why I don't have no problem actually all the time because this church times Zion Church tithes your church times why would we ask you to time if your church times secondly because of your tithes and offerings we are able to operate on four different campuses serving people in the Fort Washington Maryland area people in the Woodbridge Virginia area people are Landover Maryland area and be our internet campus we are serving people all over the inhabited world right because of your tithes and offerings because of your tithes and offerings we are able to employ over 70 full-time and part-time employees in our church servicing our four campuses we have people working in IT pastoral care youth ministry children's ministry accounting and finance operations Human Resources small group community video production music and vocal directing anymore not including the dozens and dozens of contractors that we employ as well all because of your tithes and offerings be thank you very much because of your ties and offers we were able to provide we are still able to provide medical benefits dental benefits disability insurance pay time off continuing education support and a life insurance benefit to all of our full-time staff because it's a great place to work because of your tithes and offerings because of your Towson offers we were able to purchase and are in the process of getting permits approved to complete a roughly fifteen million dollar building project including construction costs and other related expenses to open a Zion campus in Greenbelt Maryland because of your tithes and offerings there is meat in this house thank the Lord for that because of your tithes and offerings we may not have owned our own building until recently but for years we've owned two too modest single-family homes we call mercy houses where we have housed individuals for years families who needed a place to stay for up to two years while their financial lives are being rebuilt we're able to do that because of your tithes and offerings and I want to say thank each of you for doing it but God's gonna do more than just thank you what I love about God he doesn't just say thank you God says test me prove me in this and see one if you do what you're supposed to do in verse 10 you do what you're supposed to do and give your tithe to the storehouse I will open up the floodgates of heaven and pour you out blessings you won't have room enough to receive that's what I'm going to do for you there's some of you clapping because it sounds good because I raised my voice but somebody here knows from experience that God will do that he will do he will do it some of you have experienced his faithfulness because you put him fresh in your money he has open doors for you doors you ain't got no business going through how you gonna own a house at your age how you gonna have doors over for us right how did you start a company and it worked how did you get all the credentialing that you got any work God has done it for you because he poured out blessing all over your life let me tell you what let me tell you what it means to have blessed you can't receive you have room enough to receive some of you know what it's like to be so hungry with no food in the house and when I mean no food now is I mean no food in the house where God has blessed you so much down you got stuff in the house that's going bad that you don't even eat stuff in your refrigerator that spoil you gotta throw in the trash that's him opening up the windows of heaven for you some of you got so many shoes you're even you only remember you bought the shoes you can't even find stuff you got so much stuff in your closet God has poured it out over you that you'd only have room enough to receive you can't even wear it all because he's poured out blessings all over your life and that wasn't because you were smart it's because you put him first but not only that God does what gives me this one gives me I'm coming back to you I'm coming back to you God says this not only will I bless you and I'll play I ain't gonna play a little offense like she played she gonna give you a few dollars back i'ma play I'm gonna play big offense watch this first of all would guess we ain't even fair because when you think about it everything you have came from God to start with like the fact that you were able to play offense came from God the fact that you have a job came from God the fact that you have a mind the word came from God thank you had an energy to work came from God in fact you even know what you're doing came from God in fact he had to help to get the child came from God the fact is you make money on the job all of us here decide where and he said he could say give it all back to me he says just give me 10% of it to show me that you respect that I gave it to you and then when you give me a portion of it I'm gonna come back with you in anguish and give you a little bit of it i'ma pour it out all over you like that no don't grab it though don't wrap it up cuz that's mine this is just the illustration that's what God is do that's my no that ain't God that's mine watch your feet you don't even step on it [Music] this is how god it don't even make sense y'all it ain't even fair that he would rain down blessings on us when we haven't even really done like he just does that to us and for us because we put him first it was all his to start with so God says languages play office where you i'ma run up the score you i'ma run up the school God has ran the school for some of y'all financially to where you making money you know dang ol well you shouldn't be making as much money as you make it nobody your family has ever done this nobody in your history is a still feel me since they don't even know how God can bring you out of South East you don't came out the hood and look at you looking like that a number God you ain't got no background boy you ain't really trying you to be told you really been trained for that you trained for something else and look at you here getting elevated and promoted and increases in favor unexpected money blessings coming in in your life not only that he's gonna play defense for you to look at verse 11 verse 11 he says I will prevent that sound like a defensive word to me I will prevent pests from devouring your crops guess what that's what pests do I must stop supernaturally from something naturally happening you have to understand that the reason why some of us have sustained what we have it's because God kept it the reason why you haven't lost your house even though you fell behind on the payments it's because God sustained it the reason why you still have what you have is because God bless it he didn't laugh he didn't allow the enemy to attack it and take it from you that's God then he says I'm gonna make sure that the right Divine's don't drop the fruit before his ripe that's called a botanical miscarriage when fruit is delivered before his ripe it means it won't survive that means something you try to deliver didn't didn't make it because it came out too quick this is powerful God says if you put me first I'll make stuff come out when it's supposed to I'm a CC I'll make it click that's what he said I'll make it click goddess hook you up so good that he's made things clicking your life because if he had opened the door too soon you wouldn't have been ready for it you wouldn't be prepared for it and if you didn't open it too late the opportunity would have closed but he made it click he made it work for you and put it together the right time the right people the right places the right opportunity don't take that for granted job that's your god moving on your behalf and he said I'm doing all that just because you put me first in your money then watch this verse 12 he says I'm the best I'm a bless you so good publicly you'll be able to hide it God can bless you so good publicly too even though you're a real private person you can't hide it all the nation's somebody heard that all the nations of the earth will have to call you blessed you have to understand he's talking to the Israelites and they said this you know what I mean the Jebusites in the girgashites and the amorite and the Hittites every nation who had to say we don't even like them when God makes your haters say you're blessed like people will look at you and they don't even know why but he look at you and say you know what she blessed he blessed they don't even know why and it's only it ain't because you're so great because remember something wrong with you the reason why you're blessed is because you had enough sense to put him first in your money okay y'all go by just give me my money back y'all go buddy see let me say this what if what if what if in 2019 what if every time we got paid in 2019 we that's every time we got our every time we got rewarded for our offense in 2019 we play special teams and defense with the money what if every time we got played we see a guy your first I'm not gonna wait to pay all my bills this C was left over to get of God and the same you go first I save first I so first I'm gonna put you first god I'm a saved then I'll live off of what's left over if I ain't got enough they got to take something but I'm gonna play off what if you special teams and defense for a whole year what if that was your commitment we start doing that but we don't continue it's like people you know the first of the year you're not crowd the gym is on January 1st you can't even get in there right there it'd be a line at the dag on a treadmill people late with your finished and by February to join empty again because people didn't see results fast enough what if you got your financial life so tight but you said every time I get something for the offense that I run I'm gonna play special teams and defense I can honestly tell you Dane nothing I preach to you today that ain't living that ain't are usually the truth truth ain't nothing I'm telling you and I haven't practiced in my own life it's made a difference I work I love what I do when you love what you do you don't really have to retire from it people retire from stuff they don't like but you know what I've done this so much I don't have to work now I gotta come back at some point but I can leave a long time I don't have just three months socked away hey I'm saying I can walk away and be like this now I'm mad you know I'm had to keep go work somewhere later but I'm saying that's a long way from worrying about a bill let me take a quick story I joke with my mother was joking my wife on my birthday I was like man come you know I like acting like I'm poor right and so I keep my kids thinking I ain't got nothing so they won't ask me for nothing so my wife and I went out for for a meal on the dancer my birthday we're in Crystal City so we go to this place called forgot legal seafood so I had trying to find a parking space I found a parking space and I pull up and I put the money in the thing and I had to walk around the Builder to to eat with her we walk back to the car and I got a ticket on my window I say I think I'll put her ticket on my window I put money in that thing but it wasn't one of them things where the printout comes in you put it on the dashboard I like they think I didn't pay but I paid the ticket was five your dollars but I didn't know it I didn't know it because it was I was in a handicapped spot I didn't even see the sign I don't know if I didn't have my glasses on when I was in the handicapped spot so here's the deal if it was a time in the past I had a fire in our ticket I'd be praying like Laura how you gonna do this hey you know it doesn't matter I got enough money to quit working for a year because I practiced this so if I've heard our ticketing on bother me I mean I will never do that again like you will never have to worry about me not paying attention to the signs Lane trying to give them but that's what I'm saying I'm saying if you practice this you'll be okay but if you don't learn how to play defense and you don't put God first you'll always struggle I'm telling you you will I don't care you know what I don't care if you don't do figure it out you think I want something from you I'm good I really am I'm okay you don't do anything for me do that for you and when you trigger don't forget to do with your triggers look at those six things share with the person to trigger you they don't give you what you need grieve it differentiate appreciate firm yourself what's the lesson and re-engage when it comes to when it comes to this last thing I'm gonna say well temptation don't forget take the exit God gives you take the escape and sometimes you gotta take a nap but here's one more thing I want to say and I'm done sometimes we don't have consequences for our sins don't think that just because there were no consequence that something wasn't born give me change 1:15 again when you do sinful action it gives birth to something and what it gives birth to if it gets full-grown it can kill you don't think that because there were no consequences that something wasn't born remember I told you I'm gonna explain to you why you keep while we keep having the same temptation over and over again the as the same thing over and over again is because at some point you cross a line and that thing was born in your life Nance a part of your internal family system you will always fight that only thing you can do is you can either feed it and it'll grow up and kill you cuz it ain't no game if you feed temptation you keep setting you keep crossing a line what you're feeding will grow up and kill you it'll kill something or you can starve it say I know I know that's my struggle but I'm not gonna do it and hopefully it'll die it may not it may be something you had to fight the rest of your life cuz it's part of your internal family system it was born into your life that's why some things exist in families right if you go if you go up a generation you'll find out to some the same stuff you as a man struggle with your father struggle with it and your grandfather struggle with it you're a woman you like you said you sometimes it's in your family but you know the good thing about that you don't have to wonder what you're fighting yeah man I gotta fight this it could be a lot of stuff you're fighting I don't fight everything but I know what I do fight and fight we must stay helpful let's let's pray I'm gonna pray and pick my money up this may have been too tempting for this service this service you know you got half you can do this eight o'clock woman people people trying to figure out how they're gonna pay it over this might be too much for him but you can run up and try to get everyone you won't walk back I was so serious man it would not be it would not be a good move to move in the direction of this doe amen it's good to laugh and it's good to learn it's good to live what we're learning and ain't always gotta be serious but there's time to be serious it's time to laugh it's time to not laugh once I put this away i'ma pray thank you Lord for this day thank you for your truth thank you for a group of family members who are open to listen and learn now we pray that you help us to live what we're learning in Jesus name they

Channel: Keith Battle

Views: 6,421

Rating: 4.8579884 out of 5

Keywords: Triple T, Pastor Battle, Keith Battle, Pastor Keith Battle, Zion Church, DMV, Chruch, Christian Church, love, Jesus, God, How to fight temptation, saving, tithing, money, finance, triggers from the past, money matters, being tempted

Id: tGjzK56nlpU

Length: 68min 26sec (4106 seconds)

Published: Mon Dec 17 2018