Those Annoying Customers (Reddit Compilation)

what's the best way to pee off rude customers within company guidelines i used to bartend in austin on 6th street so i had to deal with a ton of entitled frat boys one guy ordered a beer chugged it in front of me and set it on my spill mat for the uninitiated this is the universal sign that someone has finished their beverage i pick up the bottle and it had less that an ounce of backwash left in it and throw it away the frat boy then gets angry saying he wasn't finished and demands another beer for free i told him i would be happy to replace his drink i open a new beer pour almost all of it down the sink leaving less than an ounce at the bottom and him is new basically empty beer and smiled luckily my manager had dealt with similar situations for years and saw the whole interaction so he thought it was hilarious that's a good one lucky you never got in trouble for wasting beer though if it's an angry phone call just listening to the event without any verbal acknowledgement is pretty powerful no yep no um no i see etc just silent listening after a bit of ranting they'll say are you even there or something like that to which you answer yes just listening i always merrily and obnoxiously tell them to have a nice day when they leave screaming it always makes them fume but what are they going to do complain to my boss that i told them to have a nice day i'm sure that will go over well i told this angry woman i was sorry for her inconvenience and she told me she didn't think i was to be fair it's hard to feel sorry for her when she was throwing a tantrum over one dollar worth of coupons my store always has a 10 off your 40 purchase coupon if you text a certain number if a customer is being rude and complains about our prices and then they ask me if we have any coupons i'll usually just tell them they have to have a rewards account to receive coupons on the other hand i'll notice when customers are polite and search through their rewards email for coupons but can't find any i'll tell them to text that number for the 10 off for me it was calling the manager over the walkie at the customer's insistence and saying something like i need a manager to lay away the customer wants xxx but i've already told her our policy is yay iii they want to jump on the manager when he walks up before you can speak so when you announce that you have already explained to them the policy usually it was them misunderstanding what no money down meant but the entire policy is both printed on the receipt they have to sign and on the wall behind you then the manager is usually going to have your back when they get there i can't tell you how many of those i'll get my way because i can yell louder than you customers went red in the face as they watched me talking into the walkie also it helps to know which manager to call one of them would cave every time but the main boss would always back me up because he knew i was polite and good at my job and working retail you're already bending over backwards to please the customers even when they're jerks so those occasions where it feels like justice is served are the best i've never said that stuff in front of the customer i pretend the manager isn't picking up his phone then go personally find him and tell him what's happening i learned i had to do that after the first time i called him to the front and he didn't back me the front end manager up god i miss our old manager i had a customer say to me you're a lousy worker piece of crap and i responded with i am sorry you feel that way if you'd like to fill out our survey and let us know how your experience went we are more than happy to hear your feedback she got pee and all i did was just knock that entire part of my speech out simply say i'm sorry mom we can't do anything without a receipt when that soccer mom starts building up just continue to smile stare into their eyes wait until they finish crying soak up the awkward silence and wait until they say well then you say i'm sorry mom we can't do anything without a receipt works every time i just come across as really vacant and out of it say stuff like mmmhhmmm right as a response to everything they say or ask me while nodding like an idiot the whole time it drives them crazy and they usually get frustrated and leave or if they're extra rude i just pretend to call security our security department is useless and has no power but the customers don't know that your employee humored my request i want him fired can't believe nobody has said this yet but constantly repeating i'm sorry i can't hear you what did you say works every time but like her our prices have never been lower like i said when they start melting down and repeating the same thing one lady nearly ran me over in her electric cart when i spat that one out at her when she kept insisting that i point her to a functioning wall-mounted scanner there were none i had one lady today that just started screaming there's three your website said you have three while waving around several pages with pictures and info for various items she was looking for like i said and similar phrases are actually forbidden in my workplace when i worked at panera they had these cookie coupons to get a free cookie now on the coupon it says it's for kids stores give them out for good grades i think but normally nobody cares and i'll give whoever a free cookie unless you're in but i'm so sorry those coupons are for kids in school i'm not allowed to accept that from you sorry store policy at the panera i used to work at i could have actually gotten in trouble for this the manager there always says to give customers what they want and or give them something free like a cookie if their order was messed up so that they'd leave happy he's a really generous guy i didn't end up dealing with many angry customers there worked in a copy print center your documents had to be ready to be copied the moment you walked in the door staples paper clips removed those sorts of things if you didn't have your crap print ready it was a one dollar and twenty cents per minute charge to get it ready we hardly ever charge anyone this fee unless they were rude or a problem customer if we did charge it we called it the butthole tax our shoal attacks i work retail a group of women were pee at me they were saying let's leave these items here slowly i will have to pick them up they sarcastically talk to themselves about putting items in their purses because they thought i was watching out for theft i went to a manager and explained what these upstanding citizens were doing my manager said he would talk to them i walked nearby during their conversation because i actually had to walk that way i knew exactly what they were talking about and i kept a huge smile on my face they were absolutely furious at my smile and kept saying that is so unprofessional that is so unprofessional yay ladies you clearly set an example of professionalism by making a mess in a retail store and talking about stealing items but i'm the unprofessional one for smiling i was recently called unprofessional because as a nurse i told the patient that i believed the report i got from night shift over what they were telling me i had noticed manipulative behavior on her part over the couple of days i had her as well as some flat out lies she told nothing makes a person angrier than being told that you believe someone over them my old boss used to give us permission to just smile at them and calmly say wow that was rude and then just continue with the transaction i worked at a private clubhouse for three years in a 55-plus community they loved having huge parties in the ballroom of the clubhouse i've evening there was a wine tasting event their contract for the event stated they were to be out of the room by 9 30 p.m giving the staff enough time to clean at 9 30 only one table of people were left mostly ho aboard members drinking and taking the rest of the room had been cleaned and it was time for them to leave i started turning off the lights on them the started complaints about how they pay for the amenities and should stay along as they wish i replied back by saying event contract states end time is 9 30 p.m nothing more and just started cleaning nothing gave me more satisfaction than 7p off old drunk people mad about a contact they couldn't fight you can take it up with the whole board if you want the contract changed lol x best buy employee i used to love it when they'd say oh i'll just take my business elsewhere i'd reply okay ma'am sir there's a target across the street don't react and just smile works 99 of the time and the customer will stop screaming and will be fuming inside unless they are drunk or on drugs i once told a dong of a customer i'm sorry i hurt your feelings and for some reason that pee her off even more don't give them the satisfaction of a reaction just stand there and stare at them while they scream in your face about what a waste of space you are it just absolutely pisses them off when a customer gets grumpy or rude with me i just say at a level high enough so people around us can hear sir i'm going to have to ask you to stop raising your voice at me usually gets people to take a quick look around to see if anyone's heard and they usually shut up and stop acting like in a shot at bonus points if they start being super dramatic i know it's a bit off topic but there's a regular where i work who everyone hates serving because she's a bit oblivious doesn't tip and can be quite rude sometimes but i was kind to her every time she ordered from me and i noticed over time she would be happier any time she saw me at work she gave me a 10 tip a couple months ago and last week she asked me what days i work and said she wanted to come in on those days but yeah with rude one-off customers i'm polite to them but then i burn their milk or i avoid the table there at because they obviously treat all hospital staff like trash i used to give them obnoxiously pestering helpful and persistent service need any help with that oh let me get that for you when they clearly could have managed it by themselves let me list off every single option for you have an absolutely splendiferous day what are they going to do call in and complain that they got the best freaking customer service they've ever had i channeled my best annoyingly happy ned flanders slow responses overly kind and understanding responses repeat and rephrase what they are saying to you complement their extensive profanity vocabulary you're legally allowed to turn down any alcohol sales that led to some great confrontations sure you piece of crap i'll come stop what i'm doing to tell you why the date on the box doesn't match the date on the bottle they probably don't make cardboard in the same place they make beer we have checkups twice a week the beer is fresh shut up or get out but i will definitely help you out all 15 minutes until you get to the counter and i can tell you so i can't sell that six pack to you because i smell alcohol on your breath and i saw you stumble back there completely legal petty as heck and fun as heck and to be clear i realize discerning beer enthusiasts do want fresh craft beers not crap that's been sitting there for six months not who i'm talking about clear difference with the buttholes i sell health insurance in a call center one time a guy got super angry at my co-worker and told him he was gonna come to our city and fight him my co-worker simply responds okay if you want to go that route let me offer you some life insurance as well because you're gonna need it we will complete your task within the allowed time we always finish way early but if they just create a task and jump down my throat the second decatur ticket they get the quotes on repeat the allowed time is anywhere from 2-15 days rule nr1 stay sue whooper calm a getated pia pla hate that also stays super polite high road city but most importantly know your crap know the policies and rules by heart so you are 100 confident and in the right when rude buttholes try to get you and if your manager is competent enough memorize what they say and do in those situations so when the customer demands to speak to the manager he will give them the exact same answer that you've already politely given them that should well pee them off working in the fast food industry i had a customer ball up their 10 bill and throw it at me to pay so i smiled put the cash in the tray and when i made the 1.98 cents of change i grabbed 98 pennies and i accidentally dropped all of this change on the floor while i smiled and said i'm terribly sorry sir as he picked up all of it he called my manager up and she looked at me and said all well then walked away call the manager he is six feet four inches and never smiles i call them because he is more qualified to help the problem but really he is more qualified in making them crap their pants oh man this is my bread and butter i've been at my job over five years and i have what i call jello peanut but his place of work justice comma customers set something on the far edge of the counter when ringing up so i have to heave over and grab it i do the same thing to them comma they make hot dogs or chili or something and create a huge mess doing so when they come to ring out i'll say hold on a second go clean it up so they have to wait comma give me crap about getting carded guess who's getting carded every day for the next month comma my personal favorite on the phone while ringing out i'm gonna ask you 5 000 questions of course i don't do any of this if there's a line and would inconvenience other people this stuff is all extremely petty but that's the point i'm still doing my job and arguably doing it slightly better but i'm making your day take a little longer when all you had to do what be considerate and polite to me also sorry for how the formatting of this comment might have turned out i'm on mobile i work at a deli this couple ordered a few pasta salads and on the first one i put in a little extra and they yelled at me no stop idiot that's too much we only want a pound then i heard them talking about how i'm moving in slow motion so on the next two i put a tiny scoop in at a time and asked is this enough after every single scoop i probably asked like 40 times and they were visibly p off made my day is this enough more is this enough more is this enough more is this enough more is this enough more never ever stop smiling and make it as real as possible these people are mean because they like seeing that pseudo slaves uncomfortable and being completely unfaced throws them off their power trip after a while your smile will become robotic and yet genuine somehow no one knows how the frick to deal with it if they're trying to be mean they get psychopath vibes from you and if they're nice they just see a wonderful person i have a really great deadpan monotone voice i reserve strictly for those who start yelling at me it goes really great with the smile really creeps them out look them dead in the eyes while they go on their tirade when they are done respond at the end as genuinely as you can interesting and then proceed to do your job exactly as you would have anyway we have noticed that you have made several trips to our store today while we thank you for shopping with us i have be asked to assist you in finding everything you need so that you need not return to us once more today read we noticed you have been here several times stealing stuff so i am going to follow you around to make sure you don't take anything and when you're done don't come back unfortunately there's nothing else i can do for that is there anything else i can help you with today comma same thing unfortunately because reason usually customers fault for one reason or another i can't do any more is there anything else i can help you with today on repeat bonus points on calls where the reason was the customer trying to get me to lie for them on a recorded call about something they would definitely be caught on not customers per se but when telemarketers call my office i ask them to please hold and then i put the phone up to my pc speakers and play cos joe if someone is yelling at you wait until they're finished and ask them to repeat it again while apologizing profusely about being attention deficit keep saying so mom at the start and or end of every scent and smile and look them in the eye and don't break eye contact and be as uncomfortably attentive as possible add fake guidelines like no ice cream between 239 351 and cabbage can only be served to people who are 58 920 days old and three minutes passive aggressiveness i work at a rental car company that has a customer tier system which pre-assigns customers that provide us with their information beforehand and rent with the company on a regular basis this is a free service but these customers act like they sit at the right hand of god himself so if they can't immediately find what slot their car is in they'll come in angry with a phrase along the lines of i don't know why you guys can't seem to do your job but my car hasn't been pre-assigned yet so i need you to hurry up and fix that for me i'll pull up their rental agreement which almost always has been pre-assigned tell them their spot number and say it also sent you the email confirming your spot number and your spot number is on our electronic board if you have text notifications it also texted that to you as well have a nice day i get so much satisfaction by just making customers feel absolutely stupid when they act like buttholes if you turn to page 734654 and read clause 1345894 of the terms and conditions that you agreed to when making that transaction you will see that it clearly states oh you didn't read the terms and conditions but i can see that you ticked the box indicating that you had before you did zis people really hate tea and c's telling anyone who's up in a fuss to please calm down immediately boils their blood no matter what the context but it should only be used in scenarios that can be considered absurd bonus with absolutely no personal emotional investment montoni sir corporate policy at this point is to request that you calm down back when i worked in a call center i used to love it when people rang and kicking off about something bill would refuse couldn't to go through the security questions you can just note them even if they ask to speak to a manager strictly adhere to company policy no exceptions i'm a nurse and a pretty laid-back one i don't usually bother people with dumb rules if it's not going to compromise your safety like if you're a smoker i usually won't say anything if you go out for a smoke even though we're a smoke-free campus no smoking allowed anywhere on company property you have to physically leave the campus to smoke but if you pee me off i will follow company policy to the letter including paging you overhead to return to your room and notifying security every time you leave the floor including having security confiscate your cigarettes and lighter continue to pee me off oh i'm very sorry company policy says you can't have narcotics and leave the medical floor so now you have to choose between your percocets or your cigarettes i'm happy to get you a nicotine patch though wait until they are done their rant and say i'm sorry some of the details of what you described escaped me could you start again at the beginning that was always good for a freak out or waiting until someone lost their crap and then confirming alrighty all done if no let them go off again if yes great i stopped paying attention and was no longer willing or obligated to do anything for you the moment you yelled screamed swore threat and smashed item on the counter threat and stuff get out now and i loved when they refused to leave stating bulls like this is a public place actually no it isn't this entire shopping complex is a private establishment for which your permanent non-binding invitation is invoked this invitation to this particular store into the entire premises can be revoked by any store like me right now with cause should i choose to do so which i am about to do holding phone would you prefer to leave or be barred from the mall and charge with criminal trespass your call you have 10 seconds starting now no one ever made it to 10 god i miss that part of the job i'm incredibly excessively polite and attentive i make them complicit in it and get them to agree verbally out loud in front of people how do you know some people behave like you have just done totally for effect and don't care if they get stuff into trouble wrongly how awful isn't it awful i mean you're totally genuine but some people are just garbage human beings and don't care just to make a fuss or get camped now i'm going to attend to you personally and you'll get exactly what you ordered and you're so lovely you're not one of those trashy people do i know you'll appreciate it people who lost their jobs by going off on a customer what is your story disneyland i worked in the ticket booths if you're an annual pass holder and you're on a monthly contract disney takes automatic payments from your credit card if your card expires or otherwise has to be changed and you don't call to put a new card on file the auto payment stop and your pass freezes no big deal disney doesn't hit you with fees or penalties you simply call or come to the booth and we handle it right then and there zipity doodah and in you go one day i get a middle-aged couple whose passes froze the man was upset and ready to talk about it a common question from guests is don't you send out late notices no disney doesn't because they're not practical and again there are no penalties anyway just come see us and we'll straighten you out the man says to me in a disgusted tone you don't send notices when a pass freezes how does that work i said well you receive your credit card statement you see that a recurring charge is not present on it and you can expect the service related to the recurring charge to be interrupted and that it must be related to your card having been replaced recently the wife smiled the man's face reddened and he leaned in and barked get your supervisor i want to talk to somebody smart to my shame i said of course would you like someone smart enough to stay aware of their credit card use or merely smart enough to read contracts they sign my boothlet happened to come over as soon as she heard supervisor so she was standing behind me when i said the emotional thing it isn't how i wanted to go out i was five days away from leaving for a new job but i looked at it as a vicariously cathartic mic drop goodbye to my fellow cast members for them it was a thrill back around 1969 i saw a service advisor at a vw dealership get fired for telling an irate customer if you can't take a joke you shouldn't have bought a volkswagen i was lucky i didn't lose my job for this one i worked at a furniture store as a sales associate one day a husband and wife come in wanting to furnish their son's apartment that's going to college they find all of the furniture pieces they want and i go to check stock on multiple items everything is in except the table top on the dining room set they wanted i go back and tell the couple the husband throws an absolute hissy fit saying that he can't believe that we don't keep our product stocked keep in mind that we are a huge furniture store i calmly explained to him that we can't possibly keep all of our product in stock at all times and since the dining room table he wanted was a very popular set due to the fact it was 199.99 it tended to go out of stock rather quickly so we would have to wait for that vendor to send us the table top which was about two weeks i even tried to show them another table top that was in stock that was very similar to the one they picked out and he would not have it he started telling me that i was incompetent and how dare i insult him insult him how i have no idea he starts increasing his volume and now he is full out screaming at me about 10 inches away from my face my manager walks from around the corner and looks at me questioningly like the do you got this face i nodded at him that i had it but he continued to stand with an ear shot i then looked back to the customer and said in a nonchalant tone i'm not going to help you in fact no one here is going to help you now please get out of my store the customer looks at me bewildered and in full set rage and demands to speak with my manager since my manager is standing right around the corner he had heard everything he goes over to the customer and says well you heard the lady i miss working there oh man i been dying to tell this story for a while now although it doesn't pertain to someone getting fired it does have some justice a friend and i go to a store let's make it up and call it all mart we're in line at the registers when this middle-aged lady in front of us is trying to use some expired coupons the cashier is telling her the coupons can't be used mind you these coupons would save her four dollars a fact that i realized after this entire audio lady wasn't having it and just starts insulting and yelling the cashier as if it's their fault the coupons expired and not smuggish insults like no wonder you work here but some deep cutting stuff like you should kill yourself if you can't override and accept them like wtf this bee was out for blood for four dollars freaking dollars that's when my friend who's a former marine steps in and dreams back into her at the exchange went something like him whoa whoa how dare you disrespect this young cashier like that the heck is wrong with you to say things like that to her you're a messed up person b mind your business and don't raise your voice at me him oh so now you know that raising your voice is disrespectful where was that consideration when you did it to her her stop talking to me or i'll get my husband here to handle you him what husband you don't even have a wedding ring on that's probably the problem there you're so bitter and lonely you take it out on other people you're messed up they exchange more comments and it ended with her storming out of the store without her items and on the verge of tears i guess we attracted too much attention because we were asked to leave by the manager but not before the cashier quietly thanked us reading through these comments i realize that not very many redditors have not worked in a fast food restaurant in any ghetto areas arguments were an everyday thing where i worked as the manager at kfc i know i'm a big shot i encouraged my employees to stick up for themselves more than once a day i'd have people coming in attempting to rip us off or get more food than what they paid for then insulting and even attacking me at times the only reason i quit is because i had cooks and cashiers who were making more than me but yeah that job was pretty much a free-for-all when it came to shitty customers i used to cut hair i was cutting a lady's hair when the child of lady waiting started running around the shop i told the child several times to go sit with her mother and asked her mother to please keep her child seated next to her well in the middle of cutting around my client's ear the child ran into my work area ran into me and almost caused me to cut my client i looked at the child and firmly said you need to go sit down with your mother now well her mom didn't like that and came running back to me and yelled don't tell my child what to do i'm her parent i responded with then act like it she glared at me grabbed her child and stormed out everyone in the shop was relieved the child had left a few days later the owner came and tried to fire me for it but luckily there were enough other stylists and clients that came to my defense about the danger of the situation and i only got to write up many a year ago i worked at a home improvement store called menards i was a cart pusher which was nice as i was outside all the time anyway we gather about 25-30 shopping carts together and push them up to the entrance where they are stored inside now to get them there we do have to cross the main drive of the parking lot in front of the store we always stop and let customers drive by so as i push the carts up i stop because i see a guy in a pretty nice suv he is actually stopped in front of the entrance maybe he dropped someone off i do not know so i'm waiting to see if he drives off and he then looks at me and waves me across looks like he wanted to finish a call he had gotten or something so i wave back and start pushing the carts across i am on the other side when some clips me across the shoulder blades and it stung somewhat and pushed me forward and at the same time i heard glass shatter i turned around and the guy in the suv clipped me with his side view mirror it had swung closed and shattered the window at the door and i'm just standing there wide-eyed two seconds later the guy gets out of his car swearing up a storm at me and how i'm a low-life piece of crap and how i'm going to pay for a new window and that i'm not going to get anywhere in life because i broke his window now i'm the type of person that if i was the reason i'll take the blame and fix the problem but this guy hit me i blew up on him for about five minutes before a manager finally had the guts to come over and pull me away i didn't have to pay for a new window as it was on video but i lost my job because we are not supposed to yell and cut at the customer that's bulls the minute someone hits you with their car they are no longer the customer they are that butthole who hit me with their car i used to work in the restaurant industry as a chef we had a closed kitchen at this particular spot so customers couldn't see what was being done in the kitchen it was nice because we could listen to music and joke around without having to worry anyways one day i was alone on the line and a server came to me and said a customer wanted to give me his compliments no problem i put on my nicer jacket and went out to say hi the customer thanks me then tells me to come in closely because he had a secret i was like okay sure so i'll lean in a little he motions me closer i move in a little more this guy then goes i'll meet you in the bathroom in five minutes and grabs my balls i freaking lost it and shoved the dude got fired immediately i used to work at pizza place in a small town when i was a teenager one night i took a phone order from some idiot woman it went like this me thank you for calling pizza place may i take your order iw yes i'd like a large pizza half pepperoni half sausage and half black olives me okay did you want the toppings combined or separated iw no i want half pepperoni half sausage and half black olives me okay so you want one stroke three pepperoni one stroke three sausage and one stroke three black olives iw no i want half pepperoni half sausage and half black olives me i understand the toppings that you want but i'm not understanding how you want us to put the toppings on your pizza do you want them separated by thirds combined together or do you mean put half the amount that we usually put on iw what's so hard to understand i want half pepperoni half sausage and half black olives me lady there's only two halves to her pizza iw i want to speak to your manager i got fired on the spot it was easier for the manager to just hire another person than it was to lose a customer in a small town oh and the lady wanted the toppings divided into thirds she told the manager the same thing and he just went with her math the b also got it for free that seems like a really stupid thing to be fired for over a misunderstanding it's not like you called her a stupid bee was a stockroom assistant at a well-known fashion chain in the uk and us didn't go off on a customer but i bloody well wish i did now happen to be behind tills changing hangers boxes when a customer explodes at the trainee cashier demanding to know where her order was she's screaming her head off at how it's unacceptable i paid extra and how she made a specific detail to collect her package she had ordered a jacket in another branch and had paid for next day delivery to the store i worked in customers aren't supposed to come collect their orders until they get an email saying their order is ready to collect the poor cashier started last week and is basically cowering for dear life i take over and ask to see her email which she explains she doesn't need because she paid extra so her package must be here after 10 minutes of me trying to explain why her package isn't ready to collect and her trying to challenge krakatoa she storms off shouting that she'll be having words with the guy who owns our company i hand back to the cashier and carry on with my day the next day i'm prepping our delivery and i get called for a meeting with the store manager i'm told i'm being let go for gross misconduct specifically being unhelpful and challenging to customers turns out the customer was a journalist for the daily mail and she called our head of company who she did indeed know personally and got me fired specifically journalists and daily mail hilarious stuff worked at gamestop as a guy game advisor some guy came in and had a figurative arse load of games over 100 to trade all with games and cases mismatched it took about 45 minutes to process his ticket when i told him the total it was low because gamestop and also they were all old scratched games this man then proceeded to try and negotiate with me to which i kept telling him i can't change the price which only made him angrier and louder eventually he yelled listen you stupid then i need at least three hundred dollars for all of this crap and you're going to give it to me first of all i don't even have the ability to change the price at all second of all my co-worker proceeded to put all of his games in a bag walk outside and toss them into the parking lot and told the guy to take his racist cousin freaking ass somewhere else into frick off store manager came out of the back room and fired him dead on the spot the guy stormed out and the second he left my manager said jesus what was his freaking problem all right get back to work my co-worker didn't get fired it was just theatrics for the racist sea i felt like an idiot for just standing there but it was taking everything i had to not hop the counter and hit the guy love the theatrix trick a good manager knows how to use it people who work in customer service what is the one thing you never thought you'd have to explain to an adult years ago i worked in student housing at a university and had to explain to her father for well over an hour that i could not make sure that his daughter was in her room by 8 p.m and ensure that she never spoke to boys a dialogue i actually had to have with a grown butt adult him pointing at the price tag on a shirt excuse me what do these numbers represent me the numbers right after the dollar sign him yes me that's the price of the shirt him oh i see thank you at least he was friendly alien that if you order ice cream for four people on a hot summer day but the four people are still like 30 minutes away said ice cream is going to melt before the four people get there and no that is not my fault you are not more important than any other customer which is why we sold whatever you're looking for to people who came in here before you people really show how narcissistic they are they are offended by the world not revolving around them you genuinely get people who can't believe a store didn't refuse to sell items to other people on the off chance that the main character comes in and wants one also it's sold out because you waited until two days before a holiday and other people came in a week ago you need to take the suppositories out of their foil packaging before you use them he complained that they didn't work and were uncomfortable i bet they were i used to be a pharmacy tech when translating the directions from the doctor to what is on the label the pharmacist once told me to assume that the person is an idiot that i needed to type in unwrap and insert into the correct orifice unwrap and insert anally or vaginally even though the sig that the doc wrote his insert one that we sell stuff for a higher price than we buy it in four they were genuinely angry that we didn't buy their crap for the same price we sold it at you only pay xxx amount wholesale then we resell it for profit that's what business does feel free to open your own store oh so so so many thing one if you wish to return an item you must present the item and your receipt i cannot process a refund if you have neither two no we do not sell asbestos no i cannot order summon for you three when water boils it does indeed produce bubbles if the water is bubbling once it reaches temperature your kettle is in fact working properly four zip ties are not simply disposable handcuffs they can be used for other purposes and it should not be concerning nor surprising that a hardware store sells them my first job at 16 was party city one day i'm blowing up balloons at the balloon counter and a lady comes up to buy some latex balloons i ask if she wants us to fill them and she said no she'd do it at home making small talk i said oh you must have one of the party time helium tasks at home no i blow them up with my mouth you just put the string on them and they float i do the multiple blinks trying to work out in my head what she's just said she fully believed she could blow up the balloons with her mouth and the magic was attaching a string i tried to give this woman an impromptu chemistry lesson she insisted i still think about that magic woman to this day here are a few favorites as a bartender a drink is liquid bad idea to shake it around yes the no smoking sign also applies to people who are addicted yes the people on the tables around you are drunk and no i'm not going to kick them out seriously what were they expecting when entering a bar at 2am you still have to pay the entire meal even though you only ate half of it especially because they asked us to pack other half for them to take home no you're not allowed to test our liquor by taking a shot unless you buy a shot the kitchen door as well as the back room door are closed for a reason and that reason is not to hide the good stuff at it i was informed by my cook that he is in fact the good stuff exposure doesn't pay my freaking bills your kid is not going to get alcohol from me most of the time i can kind of understand the question as legal drinking age when accompanied by your parents is only 14 for light beverages here in austria but that kid looked like it still went to primary school and i don't care that it's his birthday no we're not running an illegal smuggling business in the back you just watch too many movies also did you really believe that i'd tell you if it were the case no you can't pay an insert weird cryptocurrency here i've had that twice after explaining to them that we don't take cc i don't know you're regular you've been here twice and one of those times i wasn't even working take my award for your cook that gave me a good laugh that owning a fitbit does not make you skinny and today i had to explain to a couple that just because the amazon echo box doesn't state that it uses wi-fi it will still use it as it needs it to be a smart home device i'm betting you the box does say that it requires an active internet connection but they're too stupid to read it i understand you want to protect your personal information but i cannot send you what you want unless you give me your address i worked at the airport and someone wanted to go through tsar with a two liter bottle of coca-cola i calmly explained that liquids weren't allowed through security the man gave the most genuine chuckle i've ever heard and said oh this isn't coca-cola it's gasoline my co-worker beat me to a reaction cause he very loudly exclaimed what the freak maybe he just felt like a strip search that day a very p high society woman came to the store saying her brand new three thousand dollars microsoft surface bought by her husband was defective because she could not get internet when she was on the move i wondered if she had a version with a 3g 4g sim card but quickly realized she was talking about wi-fi i tried explaining to her how wi-fi works and that she could not use her own wi-fi outside her house but could share her smartphone internet connection she would have none of it she said i was lying to her and making fun of her and asked to speak to my manager who then proceeded to tell her the exact same thing she left almost screaming my mum once went on holiday across the country and asked me for the home wi-fi password cause the hotel she was in wanted her to pay to use theirs but i have it at home she didn't get it and thought i was being so cruel not letting her use it i used to work at aaron brothers they had the famous buyer frame get another for a penny sale people would try to return one frame which obviously isn't allowed because then you're getting one frame for a penny you have to return both frames seeing the blank stare of confusion as i explained that to people was always entertaining if your payment term is six weeks being on holiday for two weeks is not a valid reason for not paying within the payment term if you want to continue using the service you need to pay your bill or why their services were suspended after they filed a charge back feels like i'm talking to a child each time there was a lot of chatter about people complaining recently that sony was deleting the new cyberpunk games off their playstation after they demanded and received refunds tweets all over about ppl getting mad that they couldn't have a refund and keep the product i worked at a cvs in high school men a weirdo shop at cvs but the weirdest among them were the ones who bought diapers and then asked me if i knew how to put them on a baby maybe it's just my personal opinion but if you're at the point in your life where you have to buy diapers and put them on a baby you should have figured this out from someone other than the teenager at the cash register when we had our baby the hospital took the time to make sure we actually knew how to provide basic care and provided a parenting book that covered all of the basics not sure if this is standard or not but it definitely should be part of me wonders as they were just trying to prank you worked at a coffee shop woman comes in saying that the mug she bought is defective i ask what is wrong and she goes it says it's microwave and dishwasher safe i put it in the microwave to heat it up and it got hot me yeah it means it can be used in a microwave without breaking has a bowl never gotten hot when you've microwaved it the contents heat up the container as well her then it's not safe i actually had a number of plates that were not microwave safe they wouldn't break or contaminate the food they just get 10 times as hot as the food you put on them holding title to something eg vehicle house business license in your name means that it is yours there is no such thing as that's not really my car it's my son's car it's just in my name all the opposite of this investment account is in the wife's name husband calls and wants to talk about it but it's my money it's only in her name because she doesn't pay tax client bought a car from our dealership and called two days later to say that the back doors were not opening from the inside asked him specifically if a child lock is deactivated to which he replied yes it is it brought the vehicle back to us one of our sales people opens the door and deactivates the child lock while getting in opens the door and the client is absolutely mind blown that the door is suddenly opening your salespeople are obviously car whisperers explaining that having your nasty buzz minivan cleaned in a 20 15 minutes express wash and vacuum service will in fact not magically replace missing paint and remove two dozen jolly ranchers melted into the carpet she thought she was getting the gta special car wash things don't have warranty after the warranty period if you break something you don't have warranty warranty works by fixing the product not giving you back the money or a totally different product also warrant is offered defects not because you're clutzy but dropped it smashed you lost it that's what insurance is for and yes there usually is a deductible the package carrier says they delayed my package due to a hurricane i paid for overnight shipping your company is trash me sir we didn't delay your package the carrier is a different company and there is a little hurricane over the distribution center or i paid extra for overnight shipping and you haven't shipped it yet me on monday morning sir you ordered friday at 8 p.m we close at 3 p.m we don't work weekends and neither do the shipping companies so the soonest you could possibly receive it is tuesday if we shipped it today additionally you didn't pay extra for overnight shipping because we only offer one shipping method and it is overnight that you actually have to pay for things if you break them i don't mean like a little tear that happened accidentally i mean this woman cut up a shirt because she couldn't get it off she pulled scissors out of her bag and cut up the sleeve and down the side handed it back to me and walked off i called after her and said mom you have to pay for this and she responded with but i don't want it and it's damaged now so i shouldn't have to pay for it i then explained to her that as she was the one who damaged it and we can't sell it that she has to pay as is store policy and i'm fairly sure is a given in most stores she just looked at me and said well can't you just see it back up no that's not how it works lady in the end i radioed security and a store manager and she ended up paying for the shirt which was 160 pounds it was a rather pricey brand but honestly who thinks that's an okay thing to do an entitled b that's who that a colour copier cannot magically make your black and white image into a color one i've had to explain this to two different customers over the years and know of at least one instance where it happened to a co-worker in tech support i had to explain to a nurse how to make a capital letter for her password how do you get a nursing degree without ever making a capital letter on a keyboard i used to work alone in a dry cleaners a customer asked why i wasn't at the counter i replied i was in the restroom he said why i hope you went into great detail about your bodily functions one no i don't have the ability to find exactly where your package is right now i don't have any more information on that than you do too no i am not going to give you an entire purchase coupon because you were nice to me three no i can't stay on the phone with you while you drive to the store to return your item if you do not need immediate assistance i have to move on four no i can't use a coupon for item a if you are buying item b five no the item is not in the back six no i can't call you if i am responding to your request via email if you would like to speak to a representative please call us 7 no i cannot give you the item for free simply because there is no tag on it 8. no you yelling at me is not teaching me anything except that you are in butthole worked as a server at a higher end steakhouse that had a beautiful patio i was working a lunch shift on a day that was completely overcast looked like it could start pouring rain any minute so we didn't open up the patio the patio always had tables and chairs but we didn't open any umbrellas or set any tables a lady came in and asked for a seat on the patio we're due to the weather but whatever i walked her out to the patio and set up a table for her and as i was walking away she asked if she could sit in a sunnier spot none of the umbrellas were open there were no sunny spots because the sun was not out i just looked at her and told her she could have her pick of any of the tables she looked around and it was like it finally dawned on her that is was not patio weather years later and i'm still not sure if she thought i had some magical weather powers or if she thought if she just wanted it to be sunny strongly enough it would be maybe she was oblivious to the sky and thought she was in a shaded patio some places have a patio on two edges my co-worker and i work at a deli one day a customer came up to them asking why their meat smelled weird my co-worker asked well how long have you had it and then the co-worker said a few months why apparently the dude never even knew that expiration dates existed he said that his ex-wife always prepared foods for him he pointed at various other foods and asked if they had expiration dates too so my co-worker had to explain that each food had a different lifespan was he old because boomer men have this issue the minute they have to live alone for whatever reason my friend's grandpa didn't know how to clean the house or prepare food the place went to crap apparently after his wife divorced him can't imagine why if the closed sign is up it means we're closed why am i still here then because i work here but it says closed your work ends when it's closed well that sure is news to me because that's not what my boss told me karen that you have to pay back the money you spend on a credit card lady legit thought banks just handed them out i asked what she did when it stopped working and she replied i usually get another one yes i realize that when you were given your social security number back before the war they told you to never tell it to anyone but you called social security and that's how you're identified in our system so you're going to have to tell it to me or i can't help you back in the late 90s i was working retail at a dollar store one fellow who had one of those faces that made you wonder if he was related to himself came up to me and asked i crap you not do you have the thing with the thing that comes out i gave him a second to see if he would realize what he had said and provide some detail after a beat or two i said i'm sorry sir you will have to be a bit more specific what thing are you looking for he made hand gestures almost as if he were pulling open a door or something and said you know one of those things with the thing that comes out managing not to lose my temper i said sir what does the thing do he said it makes coffee i said are you asking if we have coffee makers that have filter baskets that can be pulled completely out yes he said i replied no sir we don't have the thing with the thing that comes out we only have the thing with the thing that swivels out sorry later he came up to me he held up a box of 35 gallon trash bags he asked me will these fit in that and he pointed at a trash can that was clearly marked 50 gallons i said no sir he asked why not i said because that is a 50 gallon trash can and those are 35 gallon bags but he looked at me blankly for a moment i added 35 is less than 50 ah he said nodding sagely you can't return a tv with a broken screen when it also has a boot print on it dude threw a punch at me over the counter after that conversation that 30-plus year-old ski boots that you've stored in an arizona desert attic for 99 of their life do not get warranty coverage when they absolutely shatter in sub-zero temperatures because they've degassed all their plasticizers dude i want to use degas all their plasticizers in a sentence this week mind blown yes the stairs indeed go up and down no the elevator does not go sideways i'm really sorry you didn't know there are fish in the ocean no i can't do anything about it no our housekeeping services will not wipe your butt if you are not able to do it yourself i'm gonna need to ask you to leave our premises of course you can complain to the hotel director about it kick them out i am very sorry you put your ipad iphone and three other devices on one outlet with a cheap converter and started a fire in your room that destroyed them we will not comp for your devices had to call security for this one luckily authorities were still around because we had a freaking fire if you throw an electronic devices into the wall it won't be covered by warranty and it is certainly not my fault that said device doesn't start after doing that if you don't pay your bill for several months your service will get cut off and no we don't owe you money for the inconvenience of it also if you don't pay your bill this month you will owe more next month and it's not because the price changed i have had to explain to a shocking number of people that cellular signals can be blocked by structures and garages and large buildings are well known for blocking cellular signals i have also had to explain to a shocking number of people that battery life will vary based on usage it will drain faster while you use it and slower while it's doing nothing and even more surprising is the people i have to explain signal performance to people who lived through having to step outside to make a call because there was no signal inside i used to work in a pancake restaurant one day i was serving a customer he didn't even bother to read the menu and he asked for pancakes with some specific jam i told him that we do not have it by the menu and we do not have this kind of jam he said that i should go to the nearby shop and get some for him because he doesn't want to eat pancakes with anything else yes i needed to explain to an adult man that that's not how restaurants work worked in a coffee shop bookstore we specialized in manga and comic books you could either buy them or take a drink and read for as long as you wanted like we didn't have any restrictions you could read for eight hours by buying a one euro and 50 cents coffee i still had to explain multiple times a day that yes you have to order and pay a drink if you want to sit and read there was a good library where you could go to read for free but we were a business and needed to make money i've had people insulting me because of this that's a really good deal actually it's stupid people were angry about this sir the cd is actually inside the case that you are trying to jam inside the cd player what you need to do is open up that case remove the disk then insert it into the cd player i worked in box office ticketing for several years we do not control how fast mail is delivered to your home if it was sold out when you asked the colleague to my right less than one minute ago it's almost certainly still sold out now no we cannot discourage young people from attending orchestra concerts and there's no problem with them enthusiastically cheering during the applause no i cannot tell you uh if your ex-girlfriend is attending this event and be where she is sitting if you ask me anything good coming up i'm either going to tell you the popular shows in the future or the things i'm personally interested in i don't know what constitutes good to you as you are a stranger if you're picky about what events you like to attend ask specific questions no i don't know about upcoming children's programming in winnipeg while working at a venue in toronto if you want to leave a ticket for someone else to pick up please provide their name rather than my sister will be right here she's blonde with a black jacket your credit card needs to have money on it when you're checking into a hotel giving me your maxed out credit card to hold until you get paid isn't a thing one yes the can of crisco has a picture of crispy fried chicken on it no the can does not contain crispy fried chicken two no birth control pills are not 100 effective this was explained to a woman apparently quite near her delivery and three no we don't have fans that only blow cold air i worked at a kmart for longer than i care to admit so i'm sure i could come up with lots more but these are the first three that come to mind retail workers what's the best threat you've ever received at work i was a manager of a clothing boutique in the mall i got the gig through a friend who later quit opening up his manager position for me anyways it was cake all i did was make the schedule and enter a code to approve returns one day i'm walking the floor and this lady flags me down son does that young man have an earring in his ear yes he does i'd like to speak to the manager well you're in luck how can i help you i just think that's very a showy if you catch my drift i'm afraid i don't mom if he's queer he should just keep that to himself and it's your job to make sure he doesn't come to work like that i'm sorry it offends you he isn't gay he's not making a statement well if you aren't going to do anything about it i'll just everyone i know that they're rf working here and she left and i barreled over with laughter six months later we went out of business i guess she knew more people than i thought i work at a retailer that sells popular body products fragrances come and go that's just how it is they can't keep them all forever well sometimes people get so upset when i tell them their fragrance is no longer in a stores however most of them are online a lady comes in today and demands a fragrance we don't have in stores i very politely tell her we do not carry it in stores but she can still find it online she loses it she starts screaming about how i am incompetent and how she should be able to buy it in store if it is online keep in mind she is yelling at me like screaming over a freaking scent of lotion i tell her most online only products are marked that way and i give her a customer service card because she is so irate and this company is obsessed with making customers happy i tell her she can have 20 off her purchase she screams at me and tells me if i don't give her money to cover shipping she's going to make me sorry i tell her i can't just take money from the store she says not from the store you should give it to me she wanted me to hand her money from my own freaking pocket to cover shipping she actually said i don't think i'm being unreasonable i basically just stared at her she said she was coming back and i might want to reconsider tl dr customer demands i pay her shipping costs for an only available online product from my own pocket many years ago at starbucks a 45-ish businessman approaches coma me hey how's it going comma customer how's it going this isn't a freaking mcdonald's okay you will address me a sir and take my order like a freaking professional do you understand me come on me sarcastically good day to you sir and welcome to the starbucks coffee corporation where it is our aim too at this point the guy is behind the counter and completely in my face ready to throw down i'm laughing and the manager grabs him and escorts him to the door unlike most expelled customers he never showed up again a few years back i was working in a starbucks and told a customer to have a nice day while i handed him his coffee he replied with don't you freaking tell me what to do i'll take my business elsewhere i'm never shopping here again they always come back there's almost nowhere else to shop in town this story happened to my friend and there were no real threats just hilarity my buddy was at a kfc in chicago and the lady before him alone ordered two buckets of chicken the guy behind the counter asks is this for here or to go and she suddenly screams you think imma sit here and eat all this c-h-i-c-k-n by myself and he screams back b i don't know your life perfect response looking back i could have avoided a lot of pointless arguments in my past if i had only know the phrase be i don't know your life i'm currently working at an art supplies store that isn't open until this thursday we've been in store since the 4th of february setting it up and people always try to come inside ignoring the three giant coming soon signs and the banner most people get to the automatic doors realize they won't open look around and see the signs then leave well it was about 901 pm we close at nine regularly and some butthole shows up and knocks on the door i pry the doors open and tell him that we're closed he says no it'll only take a minute open a backup i say no sir we are literally closed for the month comma butthole what about all this crap on the shelves coma me you mean the one stroke three of the store that stocked yeah we're in the process of opening this store the sign says the 25th of february comma butthole give me the store phone number i'm calling your manager comma me the store isn't open the phone doesn't work but my manager is in the back i can go get her comma butthole no boy i'm dealing with you coma me well we're closed come a butthole threatening voice just you wait i'm coming back come on me but that's what i've been trying to get you to do guy goes to his car and peels out and leaves a few years ago i worked as a cashier at a grocery store this woman comes up to the register one day with a bottle of vitamins and demands that i give her a refund in order for me to do that she must have a receipt and i need a manager to clear it so i ring up the manager ask for a receipt and she keeps telling me i bought this yesterday i forgot my receipt just give me my refund i keep persisting telling her i'll need a receipt and by the time the manager gets up to my cash she the woman is furious all of a sudden she goes these vitamins give you herpes they give you herpes all your products are poisonous she storms down one island tosses all sorts of products onto the floor my manager had to restrain her until security was able to escort her out these vitamins are made out of people one day while working at an adult clothing store i noticed a two-year-old walking around with one of the hooks we used to get shirts for high shelves i walked up to the little boy his mother was right behind him and said i was sorry but i had to take it away because i didn't want him to hurt himself his mother ignoring me told him that if he hurt himself the store would be liable and they would get lots of money i was so shocked i just walked away please leave the premises as you constitute too much risk to allow you to remain in the store i had a lady calling and she just started screaming obscenities at an associate telling us we're all kinds of horrible people and she's going to sue us because she was in the store yesterday and bought a pack of highlighters then apparently she fell asleep for only 10 minutes and her dog ate them and now he's dying yup she was going to sue the manager because according to her her dog was half brain dead now and all it does is run in circles the associate finally was able to transfer her to her manager but she just continued yelling obsenators and threatening to sue if so of course the manager counted with first of all that's really nothing you can sue us for considering we didn't make the product nor did we feed it to your dog and secondly if your dog is sick and or dying the first thing you need to do is get him to a vet the lady of course thought nothing of this and threatened to hire a lawyer but first she was going to bring the dog into the store so we could see what we had done to him and so that we could feel the guilt of our sin and if he died first she actually threatened to throw the dead dog at our manager i was so disappointed when she never showed up as much as i love dogs i can't help but crack up at the image of a crazy lady throwing a dead dog at a store manager i worked at a used clothing store where people would come in to sell their clothes to us but we obviously were very picky about what we took this created many angry customers i have two favorites the woman that crap in our dressing room to spite us is one another woman tried on all the new bathing suits with her period so they all had blood stains quite a bit of effort just for us not taking some of their stained clothes we also never sold bathing suits again so the threat worked row i work at a smoke shop in a college town all in all the customers are pretty cool get a few tweakers every now and then looking for crack pipes and such so in our shop you are not allowed to refer to a bong as a bong it must be called a water pipe because bong implies drug use and yes i know what people are doing with them it's just the hoop we have to jump through i operate on a three strike policy if i warn you three times i will ask you to leave i had a guy that just wouldn't stop saying bong and kept making really blatant drug references and asking me where he could score when i finally had enough and asked him to leave he started backpedaling saying that he would behave i told him again he needed to leave as i could not sell him anything because he made it abundantly clear that he was going to use it for pot his attitude changed as he pulled out a police badge the guy wrote me in the shopper ticket for selling paraphernalia which was like two grand fortunately we have cameras with audio that caught the whole thing on tape the charges got dropped and the guy was supposedly suspended now the cops around town love our shop and actually go out of their way to make sure everything is cool after hers i worked in a clothing store several years back and some guy was screaming at the top of his lungs as well as throwing insults at me and my shift supervisor that is calling me an incompetent frick and her a fat ugly bee all in front of other customers because we couldn't redeem a coupon we asked him to leave and he threatened to call mall security on us at which point i turned around phone in hand and said don't worry i've already taken care of that he and his haggard excuse for a wife left immediately a disgruntled time share owner faxed her death threat to my office in sedona arizona complete with the date and time he planned to come to the office with his various firearms to discuss his complaints to his credit he was a man of his word and showed up promptly at the specified time he received a sentence of 6 to 18 months well you're in the business of selling timeshares so you probably deserve it years ago when i worked at a department store i had a lady try to return something that was not from our store it was the store brand from a different department store it wasn't a very heated exchange although i had to call a manager to repeat what i had said we couldn't take it back it was from xxx store the lady left and i thought it was over until i went to lunch no longer wearing my name tag just regular clothes i'm not sure if she was waiting for me in the mall or if she had just happened to see me while still shopping but to me it doesn't matter she approached me and proceeded to cuss me out up and down call me every name in the book and then shove me for not taking back an item of clothing mall security escorted her out whilst delivering a pizza that was paid for by credit card over the phone me please sign this copy of the receipt lady it freaking says tip here me yes ma'am if you wish you can include a tip on the card you used to purchase the pizza lady you don't deserve no freaking tip you piece of crap in i'm white i dropped her pizza into a mud puddle next to her porch and walked away not because i got stiffed that happens all the time bee didn't have to be so rude though she can no longer order from our store epilogue she ate it anyway i'll gut you like a fish from a rich addict while i was working at a taco bell while i was 16 he was seriously fricked up and thought i had sold him something that made his sister overdose i walked into the back office and called the cops it was freaking scary must have been all the silicates and the meat and all i'm going to come down to that call center and rip your face off to which i replied good luck sir and then hung up as we could if we got threatened he lived a few states away i was amused a customer once filed a public complaint with the bbb demanding that we pay for a year of his college along with unspecified additional damages due to delays in a non-warranty repair that allegedly led to him failing his exams leading to him having to pay for an additional year of school leading to stress in his marriage and familial relationships i believe he even tossed in the threat of actual genuine legal action also good is about six different occasions where i've had people threaten to report the store i was working at several stores for false advertising you see there were sale tags up sale tags that list the expiration date of the sale rest assured i wasn't calling my manager over that crap not going to lie though i have a standard response for whenever i get threats i see people tend to attempt legal threats over warranty conditions frequently ifix computers there can be delays in repairs up to six eight weeks specified in the warranty physical damage and software issues not covered specified in the warranty people still regularly threaten to sue over all three when they do i tell them in that case i'm no longer able to help you as i'm not authorized to deal with legal matters for the company please send a letter to our legal department and we can send your computer home with you or keep it here until legal tells us what to do remarkable how quickly these lawsuits evaporate i worked at this terrible call center before the awesome job i have now they sold everything from roller hoes perfect pancake tourist pamphlets and girls gone wild basically any infomercials product they were contracted by hundreds of companies and when the call came in the number dialed would bring up whatever product they were calling for on the computer i cannot count the number of times people would jack off and ask me if i was the one in the pink top they were watching on the ggw commercial i had a few people call just to say i'm gonna kill you by this time i was completely indifferent and had only apathy for them of the several weird things that happened while there the one i won't forget was this guy that would call and ask about a spray that you were supposed to squirt into your mouth and it would help prevent snoring never snore at the time the product was no longer available for sale through my call center but if someone called about it we could offer some very limited information to buy it the guy had to call a different 800 number the first time i spoke to this guy he asked questions about the product and how it worked seemed totally normal confused customer a few weeks later i got a call about the same product this was weird because we almost never got calls for old products let alone the same product more than once especially since the commercials weren't playing anymore after answering some slightly odd questions about the application of the spray in the mouth the call ended and i wondered is that the same guy from before the third time he called a few weeks later he finally revealed enough for me to get what he was going for this time he told me how his girlfriend snores and he wanted to use the spray to help when they sleep he said he was worried though since it was sprayed in the mouth that she would you know in the back of her mouth from there on he kept trying to get me to say gag and he was getting off on the word that's when the previous calls clicked in my mind and i understood that his whole point to calling before was just to get a girl to talk about gagging it was really odd that i happened to get him three times considering how many reps they were taking calls made me wonder how many times he called i didn't have any of this guy's fave ciggies so he gets pee off and threatens to jump the counter and bash me i just said don't worry about jumping i'll just open the door and let you in let's see what you've got he declined that's pretty bad but haha i worked at an ice rink in a pretty affluent area up until a year or two ago friday and saturday nights the rink had free skate nights that mostly drew the middle school crowd as there was a public middle school next door these are 11 14 year olds with the guys dressed gangster and the girls and bicycle shorts push-ups and tank tops in an ice rink referred to the rest of the post as prostitutes the rink has a city police officer come to run security on the place because these kids sneak off into first aid rooms to do whatever some of the things i've dealt with i was working with a very passive co-worker one night in the concession stand he was leaning on the counter on his elbows when two kids 13 14 walk up pull their wallets out and proceed to see who has a bigger wad of cash on them both had 60 plus dollars on them our food isn't cheap three dollars ish for fries two dollars ish for hot chocolate but not a sixty dollar night one of them emerges victorious from the money count and presses the wad of cash in my coworker's face you like how that smells um kid got thrown out later that night for making and butt of himself regardless management knew who he was self-entitled prats reaching over the counter and stealing stuff on display candy whipped cream dispensers dipping sauce cups anything they could reach i've had prostitutes come to the counter and try and push their a cups up to get free crap comma stealing whipped cream dispensers what you should really affix those large heavy machines to the floor to prevent children from absconding with them i used to work at an upscale boutique a few years ago note i will become a crack dealer before ever working in retail ever again and a customer tried to return a thousand two hundred dollars dress that had clearly been worn make-up stains flecks of wine and significant remnants of the remnants of and remnants she demanded a refund because the tag was still intact i pointed out the stains and explained that because she clearly wore the dress we couldn't take it back but then she says what if i get it dry cleaned i shake my head no her eye twitches her face goes red and she begins screaming that she is going to sew my stupid butt off and that her husband will close the store down the owner of the boutique a polish woman who takes crap from no one comes out of the back glares at the woman and hisses at her peasant the woman grits her teeth and stomps out of the store slow claps that has got to be the best retort i have heard yet i refuse service to someone for not having it he threatened to rip my moustache off of my face i laughed and winced at the same time still makes me wince to this day the thing is they don't come off all at once like a band-aid you have to knock the guy down and then you end up plucking his face like a chicken by the time you're done everybody involved just feels stupid i worked at a burger king when i was 16 where we got crazy amounts of buses could tell a hundred stories but only got threatened once though we had this special for land where you could get two fish sandwiches for three dollars but you had to get the two if you've got one or one and a meal it was like two dollars and 20 cents or something for the odd sandwich anyways this fatty sonic greyhound bus came in and was bitching about everything she wanted mustard and tartar sauce on her sandwiches tried it later bletched and she told me like a bazillion times to make sure it got it right because none of you lazy fcks ever gets them right anyways she orders three of these mustard and tartar sauce monstrosities and i told her that the odd one would be like two dollars and 20 cents but she told me she didn't care so obviously after getting her order she comes up and starts screaming that i cheated her i told her i had not and offered to ask the store manager who was my cousin 21 years older than me don't ask to deal with the problem anyways she told me literally that the customer is always right and if i didn't give her money back she'd jump over the counter and fck me up being 16 i told her to go ahead and try it so she actually did only she was so fat she couldn't really jump and so she threw her empty water bottle at me and almost missed even though she was like five feet away then she sort of rolled over the counter and put up her dukes at this point i was laughing my butt off because it was so awesome with her lard rippling down from her fattest arms my cousin told someone else to call the cops told me to take a break in the back and get some food if i wanted then told lard face exactly what would happen if i sued her for assault since i was a minor and my cousin could prove that i did nothing actionable even better everyone on the bus had to wait for the cops to get there because the bus driver had to stay to report to the cops what had gone down it took about an hour for greyhound to get another bus there to pick up the other passengers so needless to say there were plenty of volunteers to tell the cops about lard faces stupidity tl dr told fattest that she'd have to pay extra for buying an odd number of sandwiches got called a liar assaulted and almost got to beat up said fatis and get away with it self-defense and minor ftw a woman was trying to return christmas gifts without a receipt and we couldn't give her cash just a gift card or an exchange she said that wasn't acceptable because she didn't like our clothes and never shopped there i knew our dm would say no to a cash override because of all the thefts in the area at that time i watched him say not to an identical situation earlier that day so i apologized but said that was all i could do for her so she stamped her foot saying i'll never shop here again and everyone at the service desk laughed while i pointed out you never have so i guess that's okay she turned an odd shade of purple and left pooped on that bee i worked at a computer repair desk at my university we had a guy come in who had some hardware issue which gets escalated to our full-time hardware guys there was some mix-up with his warranty claim and the part was a week or two late we apologize and offer him a discount for his trouble then he had some software issue so we sat down with him and took a look at it i can't remember the details of what we messed up but he threatened to come back with his mp5 and shoot us all and then blow up the building so we blocked the door and called the police i'm a restaurant manager and one woman who wasn't satisfied with her caesar salad once threatened to call her congressman i believe she said this is why we have elected officials i had to excuse myself for fear of laughing directly at her i worked at a sandwich shop and this guy ordered two sandwiches on white bread i misheard him and thought he said wheat he wasn't facing the counter when he stated his order and started to put cheese on them big clarified before putting them in the oven and immediately corrected the mistake took about 15 seconds he got so enraged over this minor mistake he held his hand up like he was about to backhand me and said you people always get this wrong i can't believe this can i slap you lady came to the gas station i work at and gets a fill up i tell her how much it is and she holds out a debit card oh you'll have to comment for that no i don't you have the portable machine oh sorry we haven't had that for ages you have to come in i was here just the other day and used it no you didn't we haven't had it since july well i'm never coming here again oh number not lady i've never seen before not you please no i worked at at the time it was near christmas and a woman came in and bought a guitar hero 3 bundle fast forward three days man and woman coming to return the bundle because he didn't want it he was very thugged out says yo man i am low on do right now when is this refund gonna credit back in my account can i get cash i informed him that i could not give him cash as he paid with his card i said that it could be anywhere from 1-3 business days for it to credit back to his account but to make sure he checks the balance before spending he complained about needing gas but there was nothing i could do next day less than a week before christmas huge line waiting to buy gifts phone rings it's him and he's angry man i thought you said i'd get my money back i'm sorry sir who is this b i came up there yesterday to refund guitar hero and you said it get my money back you will get your money back sir it will take anywhere from one three days you said i'd get it immediately i bought gas after i left and now my account is all freaked up cause of you sir i never said that you will get it immediately you're really starting to pm me off i ought to come up there and beat your bee but by this time everyone in line had noticed that this guy was full on yelling at me over the phone you could but you just refunded something here your name and address are on file sir well then you better pay me back yourself i can't do that sir i told you that you should check your balance before using your card it isn't my fault you overdraft it i'm gonna be up there to whoop your butt in a minute boy unless you have my money if you come up here i'm going to call the police he hangs up everyone in line is really nice tells me not to worry about it he never showed up at some point in the conversation i told him that if he didn't stop yelling i would hang up but he wouldn't stop crazy people if you come up here i'm going to call the police at this point in the story he had already committed assault and you had witnesses maybe i'm more vindictive but i would have called the police at this point just in case he makes good on his promise in the future what's your best the customer is not always right story i once worked at kinko's long ago one dude was so angry even as i started helping him he asked for a bunch of copies i made them and set them down in front of him how's that look i asked well you printed them upside down guy was edgy so i turned the stack of pages 180 degrees the guy says dot i don't like your attitude some people are determined to be displeased that phrase determined to be displeased is quite satisfying in both its sentiment and the way it rolls off the tongue worked in a store that sells ice cream cakes woman came in with half a cake we thought it would be melted nope much more concerning her son had a piece yesterday and got ill they didn't make the connection until the daughter ate a piece that morning and also became ill to say the least my manager was freaking out if there's some kind of food poisoning going on the whole store could be shut down and it would be a huge mess she passes me the cake and tells me to check who made it so we can call it in i open up the case look at it and it took every bit of control i could muster to not laugh in front of the customer the cake was a valentine's day cake and it was september my manager had to explain to the woman that half eaten ice cream cakes don't hold for a half a year and the woman kept insisting we test it i'm a cake decorator we recently had a customer pick up her cake which had a printed picture of a high-heeled shoe that she sent us on top she goes what the frick is this and starts flipping out banging on tables screaming at the top of her lungs in front of other customers trying to fight the owner threatening to come back with a gun we had to call the cops turns out she had wanted a life like edible version of the shoe not a printed picture so all this because when she ordered the cake she did not know the difference between 2d and 3d just remember kids it's worth threatening people and sacrificing your freedom because you didn't like your cake i was working at a concession at a racetrack at the time running the register this one particular night it was super busy it was the last race weekend of the season we ran out of coke and the deep fryer caught fire i was at the burger stand and the line was crazy this one lady came and ordered a burger with cheese trying to be quick i yelled back to the cooks one cheeseburger she looks at me and huffs no i said a burger with cheese not a cheeseburger so i had to yell back sorry a burger with cheese cancel the cheeseburger it's just one of the many moments in my customer service retail career that made me question my sanity just a little this reminded me of when i was in japan and had to do this as a customer i wanted a hamburger but the lady said i'm very sorry we don't carry hamburgers anymore only cheeseburgers i don't my best poker face and said ah i understand a cheeseburger please without cheese i got my hamburger we write software for scanning tickets at clubs the software allows you to get a report of how many people were checked in overall so it's used to prove that the place isn't over capacity a potential client wanted a secret button he could click that would lower the ticket count by 15 percent in case the fire marshal showed up should have made it go up by 15 if the fire marshal showed up and he pressed it as the cashier behind me finishes ringing up the customer's order for groceries well over 100 the man yells at the cashier that the total is wrong the register added incorrectly the cashier and him went over every item to make sure nothing was the wrong price or double scanned everything scanned was correct the machine just added incorrectly according to him this poor lady had to clear out the order which is a very difficult process take everything out of the bags and ring it up again same total i was a furniture delivery guy in college a woman ordered this high back red leather chair we delivered it and she complained about the grain in the letter we explained that leather is a natural product and bears irregularities if she wanted uniformity she should buy vinyl she got insulted and informed us in no uncertain terms that she was well off and would only buy genuine leather we took the chair back to the store and exchanged it for the other one we had a floor model we brought that one out and she did the same thing pointing out things in the grain that she disliked we took it back to the store and asked the owner what to do by then the chair was actually no longer made so he told us to bring the first chair again we delivered those same two chairs seven times she never caught on and eventually decided she really liked the seventh chair which was of course the one she originally hated used to work in a pharmacy in ontario canada if you are 65 plus the government will pay for your meds once you have paid a certain amount in a year out of pocket this was seven years ago so i don't remember exactly what the amount was but it was around 250 or something basically starting in august you paid for all your expenses out of pocket until you hit the magic number then the government paid for everything minus the dispensing fee anyway for months and months ahead of time we would give reminders to the older patients who came to the pharmacy saying okay next time you come and for a refill you'll have to pay the full amount in approximately 80 percent of cases they did not believe me when the time came would start yelling at me threatening to call their doctor or your kids or grandkids pharmacist would inevitably have to come over and defuse the situation repeated every year for the four years i worked there freaking old people i used to work in a patisserie we specialized in wedding cakes and this guy ordered a noah's ark cake my boss made these cute little fondant animals going into an ark on the sides of the baby blue cake the customer came to pick it up and as soon as he looked at the cake his nose scrunched up and he frowned he said this cake looks absolutely horrible i demand a refund as he had prepaid i called my boss several times but no answer and i told him i could hold on to the cake until my boss was free and could call him back personally he starts yelling at me a minimum wage cashier and demanding his refund i told him i wasn't able to because of my position and tried calling my boss again he continued yelling i asked him to calm down or i would have to ask him to leave he yelled back at me one more time i want my freaking refund to which i told him a game i couldn't do so his response was to open the cake box remove the cake and throw it at me my duck it hit the wall and i told him in no small way that he wouldn't get his refund back and if he didn't leave i would call the cops the next day he called the patisserie and demanded to talk to my boss she told him that since he threw the cake at her employee in that he wouldn't just relax and let her call him back he wouldn't get his cake and was permanently banned from the establishment tl dr some guy ordered a cake and threw it at me when i couldn't get him a refund without my boss in college i worked for a kitchen bath bedding superstore there was a special on high-end pots and pan sets essentially if you bought a particular set 250 ish you got an accompanying pan for one cent the signage was very clear that the bonus pan was only a penny if you bought the full set it was in large print i was a cashier and i rang up the pan for the regular price 75 because she didn't have the set she immediately exploded and said the pan was on sale for one penny i didn't work in that depth but knew that was bulls i call my the manager up who calmly explained what the special was she said we were trying to scam her and manipulate customers and actually made us call corporate because we were too stupid to understand the sale after she and my manager spoke to someone corporate said to give her the pan for a penny and tell her we appreciated her business i to this day remain p that the woman was rewarded for throwing a hissy fit worked on a ferry dock that sent cars over on a fairly busy day a woman came and parked her car in the ferry line and then left when the ferry came we had to load the cars on the ferry customers drove them on first well this woman wasn't back yet so we had caused a huge confusion on the dock trying to fish out the cars and trucks behind her and we finally got everything loaded and sent the boat off only about five ten minutes late on a tight schedule a woman comes back and sees it we skipped her and starts bitching at me an 18 year old lowly doc hand and starts bitching hardcore about how we weren't allowed to skip her and should have went looking for her i told her that we've never done that and how she caused us to be late she then asked for my superior who luckily backed me up she then still not convinced called the owner of a fairy because of course she knew him that's when i thought i was frick because even though i knew i was right i thought the owner would take the side of his friend however he stayed on my side and defended me much to the anger of this woman we got her on the next ferry and i told the captain to put her car on the side that would get the most water from the waves and he smiled and did so a few hours later the owner of the ferry came over and bought me an ice cream telling me he was sorry i had to deal with his friend tl dr got ice cream from my boss because customer thought time revolved around her working at a pawn shop when a kid and his parents come in the kid wants to sell his original xbox and wants an outrageous amount claiming he had modded it and installed a large hdd parents were backing him up during the whole thing claiming how he was so good with computers and technology at the time i was modding plenty of boxes for friends so right off the bat i could tell the kid was full of crap the xbox still had the stock crappy dashboard and warranty sticker had not been broken yet still couldn't convince the kid's parents otherwise finally i cracked the case open on the counter and showed the parents the stock 8 gb drive needless to say they were p at their so and left with him in tow and the xbox felt pretty good after that i'm happy that it was simply a case of the parents trusting their son and then being reasonable after being proven wrong i'd be mad if they'd instantly dismissed what he said because he's a kid and just as mad if they'd insisted they were right about his mods and crap after proven wrong back in the day of working a crappy drive-through i had a guy in a new car come through and proceed to hit a polar wall on his way up he began to yell at me about how this car just cost him forty thousand dollars and he is expecting compensation for the damage we did to his car and how it's all our fault i told him that if he is going to buy a car that expensive he should be able to drive it properly which i know was rather rude but 15 year old me had no patience for anyone like that and then rang up his order he then went off again about how we should be compensating him for his car and he couldn't believe i was going to gasp still charge him for his meal sorry buddy i am not responsible for your inability to drive i had a customer read my name tag when i worked at a local coffee shop he then looked at me and said that is a very peculiar name i mentioned to him i was named after an automobile he then proceeded to tell me that i could not be named after an automobile because that is illegal me being polite just went along with him until he told me that i should change my name because it was copyright infringement and that he will report me to the right authorities i really hated that job with people like this you should just play along yep my parents bought the rights to use it as a name and had to pay 10.000 for the rights to use it and half my salary goes to maintaining the rights every year worked at the messtop we had a policy against returning open new games however the way the games were stored displayed meant the last copy was always opened case on the floor game behind the counter in this case we had plastic stickers we placed over the edge to seal it and always always pointed this out to customers at least at my store so this rich looking lady comes in tosses a crappy pet's ds game on the counter and demands a refund it's a display copy and i can immediately see there is no plastic seal i kindly explained the policy to her apologized offered a trade-in etc she was not having it and became increasingly rude well he didn't open it he's been with me the whole time the game was bought over a week prior he just doesn't want it are you calling me a liar typical entitled customer balls so i finally decide i'm done i'm dropping it score one for the customer i'll convert the game to use later i open the case to put the game in an envelope and it's not there the look on this woman's face after she had rudely insisted for 10 minutes that her bratty kid had never opened the thing was absolutely freaking priceless i just showed her and she walked out without another word i'm surprised she didn't try to insist that you sold her an empty case how dare you sell me in an open empty case i work in a large chain home improvement store i don't know how often it is demanded of me a barely above level employee to provide a 35 to 50 discount on all kinds of goods whenever i refuse they want the manager who tells them the same when the manager leaves they try me again like i'll magically be capable and willing to give them absurd discounts you start smiling at them and you say today's your lucky day today is deep discount day then you ring everything up at the full price they'll go wait a minute i thought you said today's deep discount day then you say today's your lucky day today is deep discount day while staring directly at them at a point 10 feet past their face and you smile the whole time you're doing it i used to work in university housing a dad called my supervisor and demanded that his son's roommate get evicted because his son bribed the roommate to move out and he didn't oh no that guy's son also harassed me threatened me asked me to embezzle money demanded me my staff and my boss be fired then sued me he wants to be a congressman no joke i have complete confidence that he will in fact be a congressman one day when i waited tables a lady got mad at me because her iced tea wasn't cold i couldn't find a way to chill it since she told me minutes earlier that she was allergic to ice while working at the store that was created at the very depths of satan's anus walmart i was pulled from my regular spot in apparel to the registers when they were having a huge wave of people having done registers two or three times i was pretty used to it and was only a little challenged with remembering the fruit vegetable codes and such so anyway i open a lane and up walks a very wide very tall man with a cart overflowing with food cool whatever i ask how he is and begin ringing up his items all is well and we're about 350 dollars into his transaction when the goddamn cabbage reaches me it didn't have a sticker and i didn't remember the code so i quickly checked the chart by the register for the code type it in the scale weighs the infant-sized cabbage and calculates the price all is well i go to bag the cabbage when i hear that's not how much that is i double check to make sure it wasn't rung up multiple times and explained that it costs x amount per whatever weight cabbage is poor man's food it shouldn't be that freaking much i'm not paying that much for cabbage once again i try to explain to him that it's all based on weight and i can't lower the price of his cabbage after yelling at me and berating me over this he wants to see a manager fine freak you but fine so i call up a manager who is obviously already very done with everyone's crap and explain to him what's going on he tells the customer exactly what i did but offers to remove it if it's really that big of a deal guys says no it's fine whatever at this point i'm nearly in tears and just want to get back to folding t-shirts i finish ringing up his items in silence while the customer keeps telling me how i should at least offer him a discount or give him the cabbage for free since i caused so much trouble tldr fat man screams at me about the price of his cabbage despite his entire purchase being around 400 he wanted you to give him a discount for the trouble you caused by charging him the correct price that's an impressive amount of gall i'm a pharmacy technician and one time a patient told me her doctor said she could not have tylenol but acetaminophen was fine but they're the same thing tylenol is just the brand name she was convinced i was wrong i used to do outdoor catering we would set up a grill and buffet at people's houses we cooked they ate one windy day i was set up for a grad party or something cooking away there was only one location i was allowed to grill so that's where they put me fine after the burger grease and such start falling onto the coals a significant amount of smoke rises as you would expect the wind was blowing it in their direction mind you they're like 30 yards away so it's not like i'm fumigating them the lady comes over screaming to make the smoke stop going that way and proceeds to tell me to turn the grill the other way mum the orientation of the grill will not change wind direction after arguing with her i rotate the grill smoke still coming she then proceeds to tell me how i need a wall to block the smoke cause my boss complains about me about smoke about not having a wall by the grill which would accomplish about as much as turning the grill around but then the wind would just blow some of the smoke over the wall in her direction and then she will demand a higher wall i worked retail as an assistant manager for a few years while in college i had a woman come in and proceed to tell me she had a return she said she needed to return her wallet because the purse that matched it had broke so she had no use for it now i proceeded to smile and ask where the return was she then proceeded to show me the wallet she was using and started pulling her money license and act out of it this wallet looked beta heck and broken in it looked like you would figure an old wallet would look i stood there for a minute contemplating if this woman was for real turns out she was i told her ma'am i cannot take back a used wallet because you bought a matching person it broke she went on a tirade from there your other store took the purse back and i had used it blah blah blah i want my money rar i want to talk to your manager he looked at it and told her no she spent another 20 minutes getting the district manager's number she went on yelling about how we were racist and if she was white we would have returned it we were both minorities might i add we didn't return it because it was used to heck it had her money license credit cards and kids photo in and for god's sake no i am not returning the wallet you walked in using oh without the receipt might i also add retail never ceased to amaze me dude came in wanting to return a can of lysol no problem except the can looked like it was from the 70s was rusty and his receipt was from a local store that closed in the late 80s probably not the greatest story ever but here goes i work at a fuel depot in a small town in awes and our focus is on delivering to local farms we do run fuel on the forecourt but we don't keep usual service station hours i had just returned from my scheduled one-hour lunch break to find a gentleman on the forecourt waiting to fuel up with lpg of which we are the only supplier in town after filling up and coming up to pay he proceeds to ask what kind of fuel station closes for lunch after explaining that i am required by law to close for lunch he launches into a tirade that's nonsense there's no such law about fuel stations closing for lunch and begins to call me a lazy prick and a liar after a few minutes of me staring deadpan he finally finishes complaining i politely but not calmly explain that australia's laws and more specifically my award agreement specifies that i can work five hours before taking a mandatory lunch break and that any issues with my working hours need to be raised with my manager and that i would give him my manager's number if he would like to follow it up the bloke ended up leaving and the next day my manager called to ask what had happened i explained everything and my manager then told me this gentleman claimed he had been ignored and then verbally abused when he had requested service my manager had already checked the security camera footage and seen what had happened and just wanted to confirm frick that guy though back when i was working at a small ice cream store we made our own ice cream there was a woman who came in asking for a few pints of vanilla but while i was filling up the containers she mentioned to me that she was going on the road and that she wanted it packed in such a way that it wouldn't melt i told her that i wasn't aware of anything like that but since i was a new employee at the time i asked one of my more senior colleagues to help me out she came out and told the woman that we don't have anything like that and that we've never had anything like that the woman insisted that she'd been given this packaging before and when my friend firmly told her that was impossible she started throwing a fit tears were in fact shed until my manager came out and calmed her down i wrapped it as best i could in paper bags and she left clearly still upset my manager then turned to me and said that woman has been here three times she has always asked for insulation we've never had any and never given her anything beyond extra paper bags i used to work at a frozen yogurt place we'd just give them bags with ziplocks of ice around them i worked at a drug store as a cashier shift supervisor for seven years so i have a thousand stories i could tell some of the worst customers were the extreme couponers i love a good deal as much as the next person but we had a handful of regulars who would scam our policies thinking they were so much smarter than us and we couldn't do anything about it one of the worst times was when i almost called the cops on a guy for screaming at me leaning over the counter and pointing his finger in my face i don't remember the exact item but it was for a certain brand and specific kind of vitamin not even in small print very clearly stated the brand was on sale but only up to a certain size not including what the coupon was for he demanded i let him use the coupon so he could basically get it for free mind you like three dollars off or something and when i wouldn't he called me stupid and got in my face he used the customer as always right lying on me and i said well in this case you should probably read the coupon and i won't commit fraud tl dr angry jerk got in my face because he was too stupid to read a coupon a customer came up to me the manager with a warm smile and an extended hand i grabbed his hand and shook it as normal people in society do he immediately dropped his smile and said angrily you may have noticed my hands are soaking wet you are completely out of paper towels in the bathroom i pulled my hand back that's because there are no paper towels in the bathroom there are hand dryers i was caught off guard by this one that's not even particularly mean or rude it's just really weird i was at work s box and there was a lady that came in wondering about the difference between a frappe and a latte she's a regular and usually gets brewed coffee so i explained it to her blended versus espresso she asked if they both came in decaf and i said yes she asked for the strongest tasting drink we have and i said plain espresso has the strongest taste and is stronger than the brood she ended up ordering an americano venti and asked for it in decaf and i said sure she later exclaimed that she was going to work a 12-hour day and needed the caffeine i told her multiple times that decaf means no caffeine and pretty much just the flavor she told me i was wrong and told my boss i was wrong why i worked at a gas station guy walks in asks for cigarettes i ring them up guy flips his crap that i'm ripping him off the sign clearly says 5.83 and tax he wants to know why they are six dollars and 15 cents or whatever sales tax adds to them i then spent five minutes of my life explaining the intricacies of sales tax to a 42 year old child i worked as a seattle's best barista at a borders bookstore back when that was a thing r.i.p we made these delicious cold drinks called evaculous basically a frappucino but in my opinion much better due to the ingredients in each specific one it was a summer day and there was a very long line wrapping all around the cafe filled with people who wanted drinks from us a lady approached the counter and asked if our jovaculus tasted at all like the vanilla coffee fraps you can get at gas stations i answered honestly no they are not the same but they have enough similarities and taste and texture she agreed to try one i made her a vanilla javacula she tried it and at once wanted it remade because it wasn't quite enough like the ones at the gas station again i told her this would not be the same drink but i could add more vanilla powder as to give it a creamier taste she tried the second attempt again this isn't what i get at the gas station she's beginning to get irate put less coffee in it put more milk add more flavor as if she can somehow design this drink herself this goes on for 2x more each time she asks for it to be remade best part customer behind her says loudly maybe if you don't think it's enough like the fraps at the gas station you should go to the damned gas station the lady's face was priceless she looked away and i was able to proceed with my other guests it took everything out of me not to laugh at her just a few days ago a woman came through my register she was buying a cart full of pretty typical family stuff cereal baby food kids clothing etc she was on her phone the whole time which is pretty typical for this store for some reason early in the transaction she just sort of announces to herself other person on the phone crap i forgot the liners notice she just said liners not any specific product name or hint as to what she meant i went through my usual script of how are you doing today huh oh fine and then did you find everything you needed which was met with the look of confusion before she returned to her phone call slowly unloading her cart i scan all of her items as i make one-sided small talk because i like annoying the people who are on their phones the whole time stuff like oh what a cute shirt this cereal looks good etc as i tell her the total she manages to take the phone away from her ear to ask me so did they grab my liners me um what is it that you needed exactly her sigh i told you i forgot to grab liners so did someone get them for me yet i'm kind of in a hurry me well mom i wasn't sure what you meant trash bag liners feminine products i couldn't think of another meaning for the word another loud sigh baby bottle liners i need them someone needs to go get them i call the infant department and ask her questions like the bottle size if she wants a big small pack store brand or name brand and repeat the info to the employee on the sales floor so he can grab them all of these questions are of course a major inconvenience because i'm interrupting her phone call the co-worker shows up with a package that matches what the customer has told me she looks at it and goes this is not the kind i use i specifically told you drop in bottle liners store brand i keep smiling and ask the co-worker to grab the correct kind with this new knowledge of exactly what she wants her number this is ridiculous i'm late to pick up my kids she just walked away from my register leaving all of her items bagged and in the cart which she left she didn't steal anything and grumbling to her friend on the phone about how incompetent we all were all because she couldn't just tell us what she needed or actually asked me to have someone grab it or even remember to pick it up herself during her shopping or even remember to pick it up herself during her shopping in england they'd tell her to frick off and get it herself if the stupid b forgot it this isn't a five hotel lady and i'm not the butler i used to do customer service for a major pharmacy we had a customer complain that the pharmacist had barred her from buying on the shelf codeine products in demand did she get a prescription if she wants more codeine i talked to the doctor she explained very very slowly but he doesn't think i need them but he's wrong she used her awards card every time she bought codeine so we were able to see how bad it really was she was literally taking 120 coding pills every day we notified every pharmacy in the area that she was abusing them and backed the pharmacist up i thought she'd be pee but god bless codeine she just said what ha oh yeah okay yep she wasn't taking those pills btw what was your breaking point where you snapped and went off on a rude butt customer i used to be a shift supervisor at a pet store i once had one of the girls come up to the front crying immediately my big sister instincts kicked in and i asked her what's wrong turns out there is some jerk back in the dog food section that she was trying to help and he was a total butt to her arguing with her about something that she was entirely correct about so i head back there donghead is back there throwing around bags of dog food so i ask if he needs help and he goes off on me about the girl that was just back there and how useless she was so i listened to him rant and then correct him and tell him he was out of line he gives me the favorite haven't you heard the phrase the customer is always right line so i give him a flat look and respond with yeah and in this case he's also a horse's butt he loses it and yells saying he wants to speak to the manager i give a shrug and say i am the manager if you want you can fill out a customer complaint card on your way out and i will make sure i get it but you need to leave now i have managed at so many different retail stores i am not even phased by people anymore i am so glad to be out of the industry back when i was managing fast food every once in a while someone would pull the customer as always right card and i would tell them they were no longer a customer and banned them had a woman come into my red themed department store asking about cameras we aren't trained in every individual camera so we usually just refer to the item cards on display near the device that list the basic specs and features she wanted to know why one which seemingly had better specs was priced lower than another best we could give her was uhh idk that's just the way it is the entire time she's berating my teammate who i had been called to assist and starts ripping into me telling me she should have just gone to pc richardson's instead of my store after finally deciding on when i ring her out where she continues to be about the service and knowledge level i asked if she wanted a replacement plan which is standard practice on all electronics purchases she was like are you kidding me i've never had a worse experience and there's no way i'm giving you any more money i smiled and told her well next time mom there's always pc richardson's she was pissed what did you just say to me i repeated myself well i should just go return this right now sure thing guest services at the from can definitely help you with that just make sure you have your receipt handy i've done similar i work in sales customer service over the phone and the following happens shockingly pretty often customer will ring in too late to order something and the items sold out well i'll just never order with you again okay i'll just disable your account with us it'll just take me a moment no no that's okay i offered a very minor celebrity in the uk who was in town to do a pantomime a store card that we have to offer everyone and his response was i don't need five off i could pay your wages for 10 years from one job don't you know who i am so i decided to lie not a clue i then called my boss who i knew didn't watch any soaps on the tannoy and asked him if he knew said celeb he said sorry no should i then i asked the customer behind him who said no mainly she was just getting involved or she genuinely didn't know i have no idea but that lady was a legend then he said sam kane brookside coronation street i finished with nope still don't know you so you sure you don't want to take advantage of the five discount it means you save three pounds and 55 pence he walked out my manager complimented me on my store card pitch it was a good afternoon this happened about a year ago i managed a team of about 12 call center employees guy calls into my tech support desk we do b2b software and absolutely berates one of my interns until she's in tears my most senior analyst takes the call from the intern and he rips into her as well cursing whole nine yards guy was a real butthole to any of the female staff whenever he'd call in anyway he was one of our frequent flyers i was not having a great day but against my better judgment i took the phone out of her hand and laid into him didn't curse but by the time the call was over he understood in no uncertain terms that i knew he was a real butthole and yes i'm the manager and no he was not welcome to ever call us again after firing the customer i hung up looked around every one of my staff my boss boss's boss and the next team over were peeking above their cube walls and out of offices went out for a smoke to get mentally ready for the paperwork i knew i'd be getting for telling a customer off came back inside and nobody said a word never heard about it from my bosses i work at a concert venue where i normally check bags and do security until warped or came around the food vendors were understaffed so i was moved to a stand where we never had enough food and i was the only one doing food prep which i hadn't learned how to properly do about two hours into cutting deals with people who ordered something i ran out of saying oh chicken sandwich sorry just ran out i feel really bad but i have burgers can that work i'll throw in some fries someone starts giving me crap my line is backed up like 15 customers as it had been for an hour now and this person somehow thinks that i can do anything about my current situation besides leave i didn't even need to say anything i looked the bee in the eyes shut my own for a few seconds took a deep breath and exhausted hunched over the bar when i look up at my line of now 20 people i make eye contact with the guy behind her in line he turns the girl around and says we're here to see a concert get drunk and have fun while this kid is stuck slaving away making food for people all day how about you leave the freaking kid alone i'll refund you right now what did you get for every one horrible person i deal with there are at least five who keep a smile and make me happy to work there then there's that guy who brings a tear to my eye by looking out for me that guy is freaking amazing one of my co-workers was feeling under the weather about midway through her shift so i was asked to move my till over to the register she was on so that she could go home no biggie i grabbed my till walk over and quietly tell co-worker hey i'm here to relieve you so you can go home hope you feel better she finishes up her transaction pulls her till out starts gathering her stuff up next customer in line starts complaining about how long she's going to have to wait i put my till into the register it'll just be a moment mum sign on just give me a minute and i'll be with you and start scanning her stuff customer complains about co-worker not ringing her up she should have rung me up i've been waiting for 10 minutes a lie since it had been slow with multiple registers open and co-worker had taken maybe two minutes with her previous customer still scanning i'm very sorry about that mom but co-worker was not feeling well and i was asked to relieve her so she could go home the customer was not satisfied well why didn't she stay home if she was sick i don't even look up at that point because i'm just seething still scanning her stuff i respond maybe she was feeling well at the start of her shift and only started feeling bad after she got here or maybe she tried to come in and work through feeling sick because maybe just maybe she relies on the money she makes here to have a roof over her head and food in her stomach and can't afford to take a sick day i finish ringing her up your total is dollar sign xx it's not another word out of her she grabbed her stuff and got out i love this story this is reality for 99 of the population even when you are allotted time off for issues like sick injury the truth is that you are not by management and or financial situations often despite the fact above i have been on yours and your co-workers position i know she knew that freaking c i worked retail when i was in college a customer came to my till and one of the products he had was a large version of a chocolate bar i scanned it and he started giving me crap because the price was wrong i knew the price wasn't wrong because i enjoy this particular chocolate and bought it all the time he walked me down to the shelf where it was and pointed out the price tag i told him that's the wrong price tag it was for regular size not large he asked me are you freaking blind i responded with yes actually i'm blind in one eye but i can still see that this price tag is for a regular size bar and not large look at the small letters under the price he immediately turned nice and bought me a chocolate bar but screw retail never doing that again worked in a high-end hippie store lady came in with her dog despite the maul's no dogs policy told her no dogs allowed but she insisted she knew someone at corporate it's balls but whatever i don't get paid enough to argue dog immediately pisses on the floor she looked over at me with this well look like i was supposed to rush over and wipe it up nope frick you lady i just tossed a roll of paper towels at her and went back to folding not technically me but it's my story i managed in person customer service for a place in a location with a lot of crappy rich people one day this middle-aged man with a mercedes and a big gold ivy league ring on his hand was yelling at me about something i don't even remember what i'm a 5 feet 2 female i was maybe 20 at the time and this grown butt man is leaned over my desk waving his arms and yelling in my face a few minutes into his rant he backhands a brochure rack over my side of the counter and it smashes on the floor all of a sudden we hear a loud bang then a door slam the customer freezes and my six feet four assistant manager appears as if out of nowhere he gets face to face well as close as he can given that he has six stroke eight inches on the angry customer with him and just goes in his deepest angriest voice with his booming beijing accent do you have a freaking problem before he can finish the sentence the man is out the door into his mercedes and down the street i never had a problem with him again the assistant manager was in the back room eating lunch watching this unfold through one of those windows that looks like a mirror from the outside he usually let me handle my crap because i was the manager but as soon as the brochure rack was in the air it was a different story i worked at a party city in minnesota there was one night where i was working the register it was near the end of the night tired still had homework and was in a bad mood however i was still polite and friendly this lady comes in grabs a few items and comes to the register she doesn't say anything even when i try to make small talk she seemed like a snooty woman she just stared at her phone pays and leaves a few minutes later she comes in looking for her phone clearly frustrated and i tell her i haven't seen it and that i was sure she had walked out with it she walks out and comes back and says sir can't find it she then proceeds to accuse me of stealing it i had my phone in my pocket and i showed it to her told her i had no need for her phone but i will check out for it she demands i turn out my pockets and she wanted to check behind the register to make sure i hadn't hidden it the night manager is there at this point and just tells me to do what she says it gets to the point where they also go through my locker in the back of the store mind you i only had a few minutes before she comes in accusing me and then going through my car how the heck did i manage than when i have to walk right next to her to get to it after proving eyes and of it he gets angrier and says i must have stolen it because in a pathetic loser working retail that can't afford a real phone normally i'm a shy introverted guy that doesn't say much and is polite but i just tilted into oblivion told her she was a stuck-up entitled see that needed a freaking attitude adjustment that i had no need for a phone that was better because mine works just fine and that her phone wouldn't be fit to wipe my butt with lame but i was so angry i couldn't really think i still had the job the next day d i used to work at a starbucks in an area where nfl owners professional athletes and the like lived one of our regulars was some guy who had spent his life wallowing an orange spray tan and had the whitest hair one could imagine every day he would come in and order a green tea literally a tea bag with hot water no matter what there was always something wrong with it too hot too cold cup was weird whatever anyway one day during my last two weeks this guy comes in when we're being slammed he orders and and i call out green tea latte forex notice i did not say green tea he comes up and snaps excuse me it was a green tea it's literally water and a tea bag how stupid can you be i turned toward him look him dead in the eye and loudly go that's not even your freaking order every time you come in here it's something else if we're so stupid then go to another location he stepped back and didn't say anything after that starbucks employee myself a glory moment for us all is what you had for every customer that picks up or rudely questions a drink that is very obviously not theirs my mother owner dry cleaners and one of her customers flipped out on her because she said we misplaced her clothing but she tried talking to her calmly and explained to her that whatever she dropped off was picked up and paid for i believe it was one blouse so we didn't lose it she then went off on her and i basically told the lady to frick off and get the heck out i never curse in front of my parents but that lady pee me off yelling at my mom who worked 12 hours a day six days a week she then told me to watch myself because she knew people who would get my butt always nice to top off being a run-of-the-mill butthole with some verbal threats i wasn't working i was the customer it was 28 years ago i was at a fast food place i think it was a popeye's in a mall food court and my family was seated at a nearby table i watched the customer in front of me throw an unreasonable tantrum at the cashier to try to get a freebie then when the cashier didn't budge she demanded the manager all the while i'm standing there waiting for her tantrum to be over so i can order the manager listened to her lie about the cashier and started to offer her the desired freebie i was sick of her balls and sick of waiting so i spoke up and told the manager everything that had happened told him the woman was a liar and the cashier had been exemplary and that if he gave the woman anything or punished the cashier in any way i would take my business elsewhere a dollar sign b threw a tantrum at me and stomped off without her food dollar sign boss tried to comp me a meal but i insisted on paying because i hadn't done anything special i had merely gotten p off she was wasting my time and told the truth dollar sign cashier gave me dollar sign bs food free in addition to what i ordered since it had already been made packaged and would go to waste and was very friendly to me every time she saw me afterward my family wanted to know what had taken so long and why i got so much food dollar sign b dollar sign boss dollar sign cashier i didn't know we were commenting in php today before university i worked at this awesome pizza bar as a waiter i had this really scummy family walk into the place and demand a table being the upstanding citizen i organized a makeshift table to decrease their waiting time the father ordered a double brandy and coke so i went and put in the order now just to clarify this place would get ridiculously busy sometimes an order from the bar would take 10-15 minutes suddenly after two minutes the man storms and is like where the heck is my drink i kindly respond by stating that i will bring it as soon as possible however the bar is backlogged he responds don't you talk back to me boy and don't even think about getting a tip the evening carries on and i bring him his drink he then proceeds to order a pizza one of the most expensive pizzas at that however he requests no olives no cheese no onion no pepper act basically just a pizza base tomato paste and the meat the bill comes and i am immediately summoned back to the table why is this pizza so expensive he questioned because that's what you ordered i replied but i didn't have ninety percent of the toppings he screamed at me that does not change the price i smirked i refuse to pay the c argues i walk back into the store find my manager and tell him the story i then proceed to package the cheese onions and all other toppings into tiny plastic containers slam it down on the table in front of the man and say there you now have all your ingredients now pay the freaking bill and get out of here they pay the bill and get escorted out of the joint by the manager honestly waitering was fun other than guys like that i worked at a big name office supply store for two years and dealt with all kinds of bulls i don't take well to customers treating low-wage people like crap a few summers ago i had come home after working at that office supply store and decided i wanted ice cream low wage or not i had worked a few extra hours and decided to invite the single mom neighbor and her kids to come for ice cream since i knew she was struggling too it was the beginning of summer and there was a line 20 people long but no deal you ate your turn there was a woman a few people ahead of me who spotted one of the employees on their break leaning out an extra window and talking to a friend who had dropped by this woman decided to lean out of the line and scream up to the windows we're out here waiting and she's just chatting with her friends instead of doing her job etc etc i lost my temper leaned out and said mom please what's the problem here you're waiting for ice cream not the cure for cancer anyone who works hard is entitled to a break and especially when low-wage employees deal with buttholes like you they need it the entire line started chuckling and looking at her she turned beat red and went silent i hope she felt more embarrassed than she ever had because seriously it's freaking ice cream don't be a bee thanks for standing up to bullies i do the same now when i'm in civilian mode i will call you out and take a crap on you if you act like a beta service industry people i'm a bank teller and a customer i had never seen before flipped out when i asked him for his license he was cashing a check for over 700 obviously i'm going to properly ate him he grumbles about how he's never heard of a bank asking for identification i tell him we do it to protect his money but he raises his voice and says you people are only looking out for yourselves which isn't entirely wrong yeah it would be bad for business if we were giving strangers people's money but still it's protecting their money in the first place he's basically yelling at me for following our company procedure i explained that if anyone came in with a check they could cash it if we didn't ask for it he lets out this nasty huff and says how do i know you're who you say you are now i had no idea what to say here i am with a name tag with the company name sitting behind the teller line next to other tellers so i look around grab for my purse under the counter and say i can show you my license if you don't believe me i don't know what you want sir and his face turned so red all he said was why does the bank need my id and he didn't talk the rest of the transaction i did the transaction as slow as possible and counted the money more times than i needed to to drag it out he was so peeved honestly i'd be more concerned if a bank didn't ask for mayad when they're handling my money i used to be a chinese food cook one night the kitchen was closed i cleaned everything in the kitchen and everything we had in the food warmer was what was going to last the rest of the night the store closed in 30 minutes this lady came up to the counter and ordered kung pao chicken which was the last thing i made before closing down the kitchen this woman started bitching about how she didn't want the crap in the warmer because she was convinced it was just sitting there all day i told her that unfortunately the kitchen was closed and what was in the warmer was all we had but it was the last thing made before closing the kitchen which was about 15 minutes prior she then started to curse me out and was telling me how i was going to get fired because i was being so rude and how she is the customer which means i have to do what she says so i looked at her said fine turned around walked into the kitchen and cooked her a new batch of kung pao chicken and i took the entire container of dried peppers and dumped it in the wok with the chicken it was so strong i couldn't breathe when cooking it i dumped it into the quart box and half the box was dried pepper flakes walked out gave it to her rang her up told her to have a good night i hope she went home and was furious about it after a year and a half of taking complaints for tech support i had a customer that couldn't restart his computer because the watch battery in it was dead and every restart required a long period of entering and dates dos based machine this guy would not accept the standard answer and was expecting me to help him with his uninstall reinstall and build a script to input dates automatically or something i dealt with a guy for over two hours of constant rudeness and badgering while we took a lot of extra time fixing his problem he was almost appreciative then i get to the point where i add and these changes will take effect when you do a complete restart i talked over him for the first few seconds telling him to wait 30 seconds before restarting i didn't let him finish i just kept saying that and interrupting him i let him start to cuss me out for a second but i had had enough i told him to frick off and through the headset work fast food customer returned fries because they wanted salt free so i put down another batch waited took them up and brought them to the customer salt free two minutes later they come back and flip major crap saying they are still too salty i didn't lose my crap but my manager behind the counter didn't take too kindly and kicked him out of the store felt good sounds like they were the ones who were salty this pompous butt came into my restaurant one afternoon with his wife and one of my favorite co-workers ended up getting him as a table right off the bat he started snapping his fingers at people to get their attention cutting them off only to not say a word having every type of passive aggressive negative comment about the restaurant ranging from the seats to the table to the drinks and so on i wound up having to run his food to him and when i got there he was in the middle of scolding my friend on why our food was prepared a certain way wtf it's a cajun restaurant owned by a dude from new orleans it's gonna be on the weird side so i go to set his food down once he stops talking i hadn't even finished setting it down when he goes where are the crackers to which i reveal my other hand carrying as many packages as i could hold but i smile for my friend's sake and say oh they are right here don't worry i made sure to bring you extra i then set his wife's food down and again before i'd even finished he goes where are her sides which i say they're right here on the tray grabbing them from the tray and setting them down by this point i'm fairly irked but genius here didn't seem to realize it and he snaps at me and says spoon while shaking his head like you would at a child i had been sure to prepare this guy's food perfectly before i brought it out so he would have no reason to send me back for anything and i remembered his goddamn spoon smiling i looked down at his plate and picked up the spoon resting in front of his stupid face and said oh well here it is how about that my co-worker got a kick out of that one even the guy's wife was smirking a little she was with him just for the money a telemarketer called me at it and insisted to talk to my client services manager to send us an information packet on flash storage i told him we are not entrusted he then said sir seeing as you are not the client services manager you are not authorized to make decisions yeah i went off on him a bit it was an amish guy that brought out a combination of julia sugarbaker and the evil queen from snow white in me years ago i managed a supermarket in a very small town a group of amish people had recently purchased several farms and set up a community in the area while i'm sure that most amish people are good honest folks many members of this community weren't by the time of what became known as the incident several amish people had already been banned from every bar restaurant and several retail establishments for fighting shoplifting and general bad behavior word gets around so my employees were keeping an eye on them in the store the day before one of my cashiers had caught a young amish woman shoplifting a roll 10 cans of skull chewing tobacco and called me up front she had watched her hide them in her clothing when she checked out before giving her the total the cashier asked her politely if she was going to pay for the school the amish woman did give the tobacco back to the cashier saying she forgot she had it paid for the rest of her purchases and left the next day an older amish man came in asking for the manager the girl up front called me to the front of the store he then told me he wanted to speak to the manager i told him i was the manger and asked how i could help he then asked to speak to the real manager i knew where this was going both because i'm female and the near miss shoplifting from the day before i let him know i was all he was going to get manager wise he went on to try to explain to me in a very slow disappointed that i was obviously too stupid to understand manner that he wouldn't tolerate his people being watched in my store i explained in my very calm yet intense if i called kilauea with sheer foreseeable world manner that i would not tolerate sharp lifting in my store i told him i had witnessed the exchange and everything was done in accordance to store policy that i established he then said something like i would expect this from a store full of women i really don't remember what happened next but according to more than one employee i got six inches taller my voice became very low and quiet and i backed the guy out the door while banning him and all his ilk from my store forevermore i had gone old testament a few weeks later a few older amish people both men and women in the delegation showed up told me they had come to the community to see that things went better because at this point nobody in town would do business with them i lifted the ban and they were good to their word and there were no problems after that when i worked at a cvs a couple of years ago i had a husband and wife come and write as i opened up they were usuals at my store and they were a pain every time so i braced myself for the fight i'd have to put up just to cave to what they wanted anyway as i'm the only one in the store i make sure to inform them that the coupon they plan to use can't be on sale items the husband takes offense to this saying that he knows how to use a coupon and can read and i should mind my own business it's too early for this crap but i just take it in stride and go back up to the register where my red bull is waiting for me i down the red bull and those two are ready to check out i'm silent as i scan his items so i'm not berated for trying to make small talk halfway through the transaction i noticed all the items are on sale and inform him he and the wife get irate yelling how he was supposed to know that how it's my fault for not telling him and the coupon should work to make up for my mistake he even goes as far to try and grab me from over the counter i grab the baseball bat that i kept next to me for just this occasion touch me mother and i promise you they'll be carrying you and your wife out on a stretcher get the frick out now before i freaking snap they took off out of the store and never saw them again my boss and her boss reviewed the tape after i informed her about what happened and they believe i was justified i was a legend at the store for what happened and was cathartic as heck my brother works for a cvs he had some tubby freaking teens shoplifting booze and crap he waited can confronted them at the front door made them empty their crap and told them if they tried to run he chased them down until the collapsed he's a seasoned marathon runner i'm a casino dealer and we have to deal with crappy people every day but there's one that truly stands out in the rules of blackjack as soon as the cards are out you are not allowed to change your bets everyone knows this so this one guy decides to try and add ten dollars to his bet why after the cards are out and i catch it and remove it giving him the benefit of the doubt that maybe he did it without thinking and just made a mistake he immediately grabs it and sticks it right back on the bet i remove it again and say you can't add to a bet after the cards are dealt he knows this he says i can do it it's fine just deal the freaking cards i say no i can't allow late bets like that it's never allowed i could get fired for that his response is frick you ask your pit boss i know they'll let me hit boss comes over and repeats everything i've just said she says that's against the rules and you know it and walks away i go to keep dealing it turns out i have a blackjack which means everyone on the table loses i lock up all the losing chips and he says color me up you freaking you got a lot to learn about customer service and shoves his chips towards me i snap a little i literally did my job properly prevented this guy from cheating saved him ten dollars by not letting him cheat and i'm a freaking who needs to learn about customer service the pit boss comes back over as we argue about this and talks to him saying he needs to calm down because no one but him has done anything wrong he doesn't decides to resume playing instead it's a little tense but now he's losing a bit more and i'm completely unsympathetic about 10 minutes go by and he again calls me a freaking for not allowing him to do what he wants i respond with we've been polite up to this point but now i'm mad the other players are mad and my pit boss is mad tonight down or leave he says your pit boss is mad because she's just a freaking dumb woman he tries to play another hand and i skip right over him he demands i color him up because he will never play here again blah blah blah the same crap every payoff player says and i smack his chips back at him and say no take the chips and get the frick off my table he flips me off and storms off saying he's going to report me to my supervisor and get me fired and all that crap of course it had me worried i received no reprimand and he has been barred from the premises good my bosses are former dealers and fully understand the crap we go through well i wasn't the one working but one time went into a corner bakery and i was waiting in line trying to decide what to eat as i was about to go up to order i live in the south by the way your typically former southern debut and staffy wife who is no longer happy in life and had gained a bunch of weight storms up to the counter red with anger she starts yelling at the ladies at the counter one older sweet black lady and i think a 16 year old who was trying to hold a job she freaking loses it saying how she ordered extra chicken with her salad because she's on a special diet and she needs the extra protein the lady at the register politely goes oh no problem mom we'll get you more chicken right away with the sweetest smile lady wasn't having it lady freaking snaps again and goes well you should have gotten it right the first time you two are so pathetic you both work here and can't even get this right then 16 year old slowly begins to break down crying and the older lady looks like she's about to follow suit she continues to go on to say how they won't amount to anything in life and are basically useless at this point i'm fuming because i hate seeing people abused especially when they were so kind and eager to fix the mistake after about 30 more seconds of me trying to stay calm she says you two deserve to be fired i can't believe you either would hire people so incompetent i want to speak to a manager i am on a strict special diet and you've ruined it my diet requires extra protein if you can't accommodate me on that then you deserve to be late and i finally freaking snap with are you on a b diet too because that doesn't seem to be working either went on to to say if she lose the stick upper but maybe she'd lose a few pounds and while she was at it possibly gain some class her jaw freaking dropped and she let out the most pretentious scoff i have ever hear and said how she's never been so disrespected in her life storms off saying how she deserves to be treated with dignity and attempts to slam the door meanwhile the two at the register are trying so hard not to laugh at this point they thanked me and offered to give me a free drink haha which was so sweet i refused and gave them an extra big tip also spoke to the manager to make sure if the lady writes a review online the two girls don't get fired i work part-time at a very well-known fast food restaurant and i train new employees i have lots of rude customer stories but one really sticks out it happened when i was training a very nice muslim girl wearing a hijab at the register this is important she was doing fine until this man while giving her his order was trying to give her a card a booklet i don't remember with bible verses on it to put her on the right path while being extremely condescending and the girl was extremely uncomfortable and didn't knew what to do as soon as i noticed i approached the man took the card off his extended hand and ripped it in front on him and tossed it in the garbage and i said something along the lines of this is extremely disrespectful and you don't have any say in how she or anyone lives their life i believe this transaction is over now will you pay cash or debit the man paid his order and never came back to the restaurant even though he was a regular customer good riddance the girl still works there and we are now good friends as someone that is not religious i respect everyone's right to believe or not in whatever god s they choose and i will not stand for intolerance if you pee me off i'd pack everything in one paper bag and pray to the grocery gods the handles would break so glad my retail days are over turned me into a miserable sea i used to work at an auto body shop doing detailing on cars one day a lady picked her car up at the very end of the day after every other person had left so it was just me and the receptionist sadly her car had died so i went to get the booster and she was pee about this because he recommended her a new battery because the car kept dying i was fairly new and she had an audi or something so of course the battery is tucked away without obvious posts to jump off so i was taking my time somewhat to make sure i did it correctly and didn't fry the thousands of electronic equipment if i fricked it up this p her off even more and she started going off on me i took it for a second or two and she said do you even freaking work here which just made my blood boil so i unhooked the terminals from the booster and left that bee sitting in the parking lot with her dead car it felt suiroo good to drive away while she was sitting there watching me i guess she called a friend or something because we never heard from her again my boss never gave me crap for it just asked me to not do that again the shop was in a wealthy area so we dealt with so many arrogant buttholes i'm so glad i don't deal with customers anymore i'm gonna get buried but i've got two owned managed a little caesar's pizza joint for a bit one night some guy comes in and tells my counter girl we screwed up his food last time so this time it's free my cashier perfectly explains the return we made a mistake policy and asks a guy's name since we have a book we write them in the guy starts loosing it and yelling at my 16-stroke 17-year-old employee i calmly walk over to her ask her to go in the back and call this guy out for swearing at a young girl how he is a piece of crap you have no respect get the frick out and don't ever come back the random customer in the lobby gave me a high five second story i was actually the customer at a little caesars it's probably five to close i roll in and ask for a hot and ready since i'm headed to a friend's house and i don't wanna show up empty-handed tells me it will be about a minute since it's still in the oven and they have to cut it my first thought to a sweet fresh pizza after i pay and move to the side a lady walks in and asks for two pizzas the kid behind the counter tells her it will be about three minutes at this point the lady starts losing her crap this is bullcrap it should be hot and ready i should not have to wait the kid behind the counter is still in high school and trying to do his best so i step in i slam my hand on the counter and say lady and you freaking kidding me right now i said what gives you the right to talk to someone like that over three minutes everywhere you go you have to wait to at least pay how important are you that you can't wait for three minutes for hot right out of the oven pizzas she was silent as i looked up the kid in the back gave me a few fist pumps when the first two pizzas came out i offered her mine so she could get back to her important life faster she declined and said that she can't wait the next time i stopped in it was the same two guys gave me my pizza and said this one is on us after that they would always hook my up with crazy bread i read your comment you're an awesome person for doing that if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video you

Channel: On Tap Studios

Views: 181,112

Keywords: worst customers, worst customers compilation, worst customers storytime, worst customer experience, karen, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, sub, reddit cringe, memes, comment awards, dankify, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, chill, story, stories, reddit on tap, reddit stories 2021

Id: ilwN_HzwJzo

Length: 154min 26sec (9266 seconds)

Published: Sat Jul 03 2021