The Nurse That Only Hurts People - Totally Accurate Battle Simulator (TABS)

i'm more so worried about the fact that he's holding gandalf's staff which means he can probably sling lightning fortunately he's not the only one who can sling maybe if i get a couple of gunslingers in here they should rain down a lot of bullets on a tight formation like that all those skeletons should be ruined i would hope yeah exactly it's perfect now if we could just perforate oh what the hell was that what i've never even seen this in tab before he's just lobbing energy at us no no not like this please don't what what the hell is that what's up guys welcome back to totally accurate battle simulator for today's episode we've got something a little different but you guys know we've already seen plenty of player created units and fought in a bunch of viewer battles and i've even made entire videos using custom campaigns but this is going to be the first time that somebody's made an entire custom campaign specifically for me featuring nothing but references and characters from not just the series but like my channel as a whole so i'm kind of terrified to see what kind of nonsense we're about to take part in oh my god the levels even have little descriptions to them sneezy's out for a big call sneezy anus it's a name i haven't heard in a dog's age he's robbing the bank the houses the saloon everything he wants all the money he get stop him and protect this town we'll all be damned the name of the level is the thieving of sneezy anus and there's the man the myth the legend himself he's got his thieving crowbar and his lockpick and his smug sense of self-superiority we'll see how far you get yet sneezy i seem to remember him being allergic to tasers and bullets so i'm kind of hoping a whole bunch of quick draws and maybe a gunslinger would be able to swiss cheese the sneeze even though there are a whole bunch more of them than i remembered he's been busy recruiting to the crime syndicates luckily i don't think those are bulletproof track suits do you still feel smart about bringing a sharpened lockpick to a gunfight you idiot i'm worried about the guys next door probably fell off the roof and well i was gonna say broke their neck but i guess they broke my gunslingers next oh that's not good uh guys i'm sure there's a punch line for the joke of why did sneezy anus cross the road but i can't come up with it right now because i'm about to get stabbed by a bunch of lockpicks so could you maybe shoot them shoot them with the bullets please oh that that stings if it was just a random tabs unit with a crowbar i wouldn't feel nearly as enraged it's pretty bad that he can rob this town blind but i gotta stand here thinking about how many times i can say his name out loud until youtube steals from me i really want to try something like the reaper because if anime has taught me anything it's the tentacles have a type advantage against well him and then we can back them up with candle heads i guess you guys have wanted to see me dip into units that i don't typically use and i don't think i've ever wanted to send a guy with a wax candle on his head into battle let's try that hopefully you can ignore the sneezy part and just go for the sensitive areas come on they're just track pants you should be able to penetrate without issue oh you have got to be kidding me sneezy's too big he's too beefy he can't get picked up by the tentacles so that means grim can only use his scythe and he's having a hard time because he doesn't understand porches this is crap i don't even know if a grim reaper can survive a whole bunch of oh no we do know cannot survive a whole bunch of crowbarring that's a problem uh grim could you maybe swing for the fences because this is not exactly going our way and i don't have a lot of faith in the people cosplaying is the guy from beauty and the beast please please come on just cut them down cut them down you got this there's a couple coming down the road but that's okay it's not okay oh this is going to test my patience i'm thinking the strategy might be to use a large quantity of ranged units because there are a lot of sneezies but there aren't that many of them it's not like they have a couple of dozen whereas i could definitely get a whole bunch of firework archers lined up out by the poop shack didn't even have a lot of money left over oh wait a second this is the wobbly west they got a respect you're on these guys home turf they're coming for you just you wait you're gonna get yours yet sneezy if you don't get run over then you're gonna be the second anus in space yes jousters you've got this kind of i don't think they actually got this they're having a real rough time seems like every unit i use doesn't understand how front porches work having a real rough go at it uh how are the fireworks going pretty well actually surprisingly effective uh i think a couple of them are getting rocked over there but this group seems to be doing all right it's easy can't even stand up or close any ground it doesn't even matter that he's getting pushed around by the rockets just the pops make him fall over we've got so many pops that like how long could he possibly last for uh guys that they're getting a little closer now i i really don't want them any closer could you maybe shoot them no no not like this not like this please come on i have an entire custom campaign to see i can't spend the entire episode getting rocked by a guy with the last name anus is there just two left oh my god there's only two left okay no maybe the fireworks have this come on come on come on come on i'm taking control i'm taking control backing up backing up shooting ah this is a problem this was a mistake why can't i shoot all right i think that's enough screwing around we're getting dead eye in here i might not be able to cheer them on like i would want to real shame i can't use any of the secret units but i'm hoping that they'll be able to one shot a guy in a windbreaker does that seem reasonable ladies can you please stop scissoring now is not the time thank you save it for later just shoot them dead uh okay i'm seeing some bullets land but then they don't fall so it takes a couple of shots that could be problematic but they are dying and that's what matters most come on oh okay we haven't lost a single unit but they've lost plenty where are the rest of them are they hiding don't tell me sneeze he's smart enough to hide okay we got one over here i don't know what happened to him i take it back they're not smart enough for anything could you please put this guy out of his misery so that we could save this town i really feel like whatever belongings he was gonna steal just not worth it do you really need to get up close and personal though come on now this this seems a little bit excessive you gotta shoot him right in the face okay yeah that that's actually fair that's fine he was tempting my patience so i i can appreciate you guys just shooting him while he's down that was kind of dark our next level's called nurse barbara's army oh god the horror no it can't be it's it's it's barbara she's back take her down quickly such a shame you couldn't defeat her in helping hand but now it's time for revenge when i heard barbara my first assumption was the shark from graft and stranded deep i was gonna be fighting a shark but no that definitely is the psychopath nurse who tried to skin me in helping hand it's kind of hard to forget you i don't know where the christ you managed to find yourself a phalanx but i should be able to turn them to ash using a couple of dragons and then her barbara wouldn't mind using a ballista or two or three because it's apparently barbara's either way that should be good we've got 1300 left to send in the clowns just send in all those clowns that's not nearly as many clowns as i was hoping for i thought i was gonna be able to litter the line but you know it's not every day you get to see somebody skin a hobbit so you can't really resist that opportunity hopefully the fire works out in our favor yep phalanx down now if the ballista can shoot the barbara then we should be good um they're trying to buy you all the time they can but they're getting drop kicked ooh i think that's two down yeah okay this is a three if you want you guys should have this in the bag she is dangerous to say the least but she's not gonna survive a sharpened telephone pole to the kidneys i'll tell you that much moving on to charles's new greatest plan of course i mean believe it or not the government took away charles's helicopter i guess once you keep thinking that crashing the helicopter into things solves all problems they begin to think you might not be safe to work with the government but charles is determined to prove himself to the general with his new greatest plan this will surely work i've always wondered if stickman had a skeleton i guess you could only crash a helicopter so many times until you find out but is he gonna blow himself up again well if he's gonna be taking a page out of vegeta's playbook then you better believe i'm gonna have him do it all over hobbit if i line these guys up then they're going to kind of act like the land mine sniffing rats and then i've got a whole bunch more money left over to celebrate with the scarecrows yeah a couple of celebratory scarecrows why not skeletons don't like birds do they oh right charles blows himself up all the time but he usually survives i say usually because sometimes not so much okay only one left all you gotta do is hit him with the birds and don't get drop kicked oh okay now i'm not gonna laugh at that because if i do i'm gonna get about 10 000 angry comments so instead i will shed a tear rest in peace charles we all loved you very much of course we would move on to a level called sneezy's revenge sneezy's kind of upset you stopped his robbery earlier so now he's done what he never could in thief simulator found people with guns and told them to kill anyone who stands in their way so you finally learned your lesson from bringing a crowbar to a gunfight did you i mean better late than never at this point i'm pretty sure i've played with and against and tested and experimented with just about every unit in this game multiple times over the course of years but i also have the memory of a dry goldfish so i can't quite remember if the cactus is fully bulletproof i'm just kind of hoping that it's bulletproof enough to give sneezy a great big hug come on guys yeah dog pile there we go sharing means caring be sure to give him all my love why is he not dying are you kidding me right now he looks like somebody dropped a pink cushion into a beehive make him dead i'm just assuming that the others are gonna bug her off but okay there we go is he done i think he's done yeah so we've got three left and the enemy is slowly moon walking away i mean they gotta take their time to reload and i don't think they can kill you right they can push you back but i don't think they're doing damage so it's only a matter of time where are you going in your silly little white slippers this is what happens when you spend all your money on guns and balaclavas oh yeah they're not going to be able to get away from the cactuses just give it up come on keep a hug you know you want to unless you guys are actually strong close up i don't think they are no they're not swinging they're just shooting and getting stuck to us oh my god this is gonna take forever this guy had the big brain idea of wandering out into the desert as if they don't have home-fielded advantage out there okay that took a long time but cactus is 100 bulletproof they empty just magazine after magazine and plants don't care next up we have a level called henry stickman and charles given that charles's last attempt with his new plan didn't go so great he's now called on henry stickman to help him prove himself again he's sure that the problem was that there weren't guns not the fact that he's swinging around a bomb tied onto a stick the full intention of hitting someone with it and making it explode with him next to it oh no henry [Laughter] stickman don't translate well to tabs i mean it's a good attempt probably the best that you could possibly do in the unit creator but it kind of looks like a mime got eaten from the neck down by piranhas you know what there's been so much talk of sneezy this episode but we've barely gotten any snuffy now i'd be willing to bet that his thickness wouldn't care all that much about these explosions or even bullets you know like the explosions are just gonna be like getting hit with a bottle of rockets and then the bullets could be like throwing pebbles at a tank hopefully they have no problems stomping some skeletons oh that's more bullets than i had imagined oh i don't like that they're slow to reload a lot slower than snuffy is the belly flop there you go big guy just keep rolling over oh he's dead not the kind of rollover i was hoping for a lot of you guys have actually been telling me in the comments that the spear thrower is a really underrated unit a lot of people seem to think that it's just the tribal faction version of the archer a spear is a lot bigger than an arrow it does a lot more damage so hopefully two spears can take out a charles we know that a space station can take out a charles but i don't have any of those and then if not i could try hitting them with rocks maybe or i could rush in with some cheaper horses i like that idea lassos yeah okay so spear throwers you'll miss quite a few that's a problem yeah i never really thought about how difficult it would be to hit a skeleton uh crap and this is just where it all goes to hell oh wait we're hitting them with the rocks but they're hitting us with the bullets and rock paper scissors bullets wins every time i just noticed in all of the other levels i didn't have access to the legacy faction now i do and i have exactly six thousand dollars which makes me think they probably want me to use a tank very clever if so kind of hoping that we can just okay that that definitely worked uh huh yup i'm liking the whole running them over thing that's definitely going great you can shoot them if you want or you could just go full blown kamikaze well maybe instead of one tank we could go with two thors and a barrow and then a whole bunch of peasants really gonna send it with the presents i want them to soak up a whole bunch of bullets yeah there we go now pharaoh i need you to make henry stickman brave it's not something that i woke up and thought i was going to say today uh more specifically heaven pray to thor if possible because then thor would get stronger and we could really use all of the power we can get oh oh wait wait what was that apparently henry also has some kind of super powered punch i was going to say thor's deflecting bullets and i completely forgot about that but henry is two steps ahead i do like the thor's here i feel like they're moving in the right direction but i need something a little bit more lethal and numerous in the front and maybe flintlocks is the answer because they're gonna shoot a whole bunch but then they're just gonna swing for the fences and get shot themselves that's what i need yes we've wrecked charles kind of not nearly as much as i was hoping dory you gotta deflect the bullets my guy come on and she's down and so is thor i don't understand he literally kicked his ass when i'm playing as henry stickman he could rub his feet on a carpet and then the static electricity would turn him to dust but in this he gets struck by lightning from a god and just shakes it off and plants his foot between the guy's cheeks it's driving me freaking crazy i'm really hoping the ballista is going to be able to get the job done come on god killer it's been a while since i've needed you but i could really use the help right now preferably aim for not charles oh crap okay well i would imagine they're gonna reload pretty quickly probably a lot faster than you will fire fire fire fire oh yes god killer is undefeated so this is a level called the plague doctor of death this tabs wizard decided he wanted to go on a different route than most so he made the only logical choice and decided to go around killing his enemies and then resurrecting their bones in hindsight he probably could have just tried to find a hobby oh well to like change now yeah i could definitely see this one being a bit of a pain in the pooper but the question is what does the plague doctor do he said that it can resurrect but clearly he's already done that i'm more so worried about the fact that he's holding gandalf staff which means he can probably sling lightning fortunately he's not the only one who can sling maybe if i get a couple of gunslingers in here they should rain down a lot of bullets on a tight formation like that all those skeletons should be ruined i would hope yeah exactly it's perfect now if we could just perforate oh what the hell was that what i've never even seen this in tab before he's just lobbing energy at us no no not like this oh what the please is that well i can't really blame the gunslingers there because they did their job they wiped out all the skeletons i just have thirteen hundred dollars left over to get to that friggin wizard or plague doctor sorry or whatever i'm willing to bet i need a whole bunch of little units something that he can't easily throw his balls onto or something like the balloon archer yeah i like this idea because if he's upside down in the air there's no way he's gonna be able to hit us with anything so long as we still have enough bullets to take out the skeletons okay a couple of skeletal survivors but oh you guys gotta focus on the main bad guy please come on just a couple balloons is all we need there we go there we go okay this is good this is great he can't kill us up there skeletons did just fall apart they're built to graham crackers but he can't hurt us anymore he can go for a lovely ride i don't think he's really enjoying himself but dare say if he lines on his head enough times then we should win this unless you guys just keep him up there forever okay come on now since when do you guys have amazing accuracy what is this let the balloons pop i wish a couple of the gunslingers were left over then we'd be able to easily drop him oh guys why would you stand underneath him no that should have worked oh my god they're so dumb it hurts that absolutely a thousand percent should have worked i just need the gunslingers to wipe out all of the skeletons so maybe if i spread them then they'll do a much better job okay guys and we've got him stuck in limbo just stay over there don't come forward let him hang out in the sky and then when he comes back down shoot him from a distance again you guys really don't need to try to catch him do you have any idea how dumb this is like it's the grumpy-headed dumb i swear no don't don't let him come back down he's coming back down shh shoot him with the bullets okay it pays to keep the guys with guns around all right you know what i think that's gonna be it for this episode of totally accurate battle simulator guys and i've said it before but i'll say it again thank you guys so much for leaving your armies in the comments making units making battles making campaigns just everything that you contribute to these videos they're the reason that i get to continue making these videos so please keep it up if you guys want to see more of this campaign as always be sure to leave a like in the video leave a comment letting me know and maybe i'll return to take a bite out of frosty the hitman but thanks so much for watching this video i hope you enjoyed and i'll see you next time [Music] you

Channel: CaptainSauce

Views: 666,936

Rating: 4.9585233 out of 5

Keywords: totally accurate battle simulator, tabs, totally accurate battle simulator funny, tabs funny, totally accurate battle simulator funny moments, tabs funny moments, tabs custom campaign, tabs custom units, tabs youtube units, tabs funny units, tabs best units, tabs captainsauce campaign, tabs captain sauce campaign, tabs gameplay, tabs epic, totally accurate battle simulator nurse, tabs nurse, captainsauce, captain sauce

Id: 2raNwsIX2-A

Length: 22min 46sec (1366 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 20 2021