(upbeat music) (audience laughing) (Joey chuckles) (upbeat music continues) (head knocking)
(audience laughing) - Okay, I'm making a break for it. I'm going out the window.
- No, no, don't, please. Look, I've been waiting for like forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.
- Calm down? Calm down? You set me up with a
woman I've dumped twice in the last five months.
- Hey! Can you stop yelling? You're making me nervous and-- (audience laughing) I can't go when I'm nervous. - I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right. Come on! Do it, do it, do it, come on!
(audience laughing) - Hey, this is a little extra
something for, you know, always being there for me. - Wow, I don't know what to say. (audience laughing) Wow, I don't know what to say. - What do you say?
- I don't know. (audience laughing) It's a bracelet.
- Isn't it? And it's a graved too, check it out. - "To my best bud." (audience laughing) Thanks, best bud! (Joey giggles)
- Put it on. - Oh, now? (audience laughing) No, no, I think something this nice should be saved for a special occasion. - Oh, no, no, that's the beauty part, it goes with everything. You put this on, you're good to go. (audience laughing) Oh, man! You are so wearing that bracelet. (chuckles)
- I so am. - Oh, you have any idea what
this will do for your sex life? - Well, it'll probably
slow it down at first, but once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.
(audience laughing) So you want me to help
you unpack your stuff? - Nah, nah, I'm okay. Oh, and just so you know, I'm not moving back in because I have to. I mean, I do have to but-- It's just that that
place, it wasn't really-- I mean, this is-- - Welcome home, man. (patting on the back) (audience clapping) (audience cheering) - A little foos?
- Absolutely! - What happened to the foosball? - Ah, that's a cantelope. (audience laughing) - Okay, buddy boy, here it is. You hide my clothes, I'm
wearing everything you own. - Oh, my God! (audience laughing) That is so not the opposite of
taking somebody's underwear! - Look at me, I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes? Anyway, I gotta go change. I'm a meeting some of the cast for drinks. - Excuse me? - [Joey] What? - I stayed home from work today
while you were at rehearsal so somebody could be here with our chick. - Hey, who was up from
two o'clock this morning until five o'clock this morning trying to get her back to sleep? - You don't think I
get up when you get up? - Oh, here it comes.
- Yes, here it comes! I'm stuck here all day. And then you come in and
spend two seconds with us, and then expect to go off
gallivanting with your friends? Well, I don't think so, mister! - Hey, Rach, can I borrow
your eyelash curler? I think I lost mine.
- Yeah, it's in the back. (audience cheering) - Oh! Oh! - Joey, can I talk to you for a second? - Ooh! - Joey, I need to talk to you.
(audience laughing) - Oh, oh, oh, oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh! (audience laughing)
(Joey moaning) - Yes. Yes. - You and you?
(audience laughing) - Yes, but you cannot
tell anyone, no one knows. - How? When? - It happened in London.
- In London? (audience laughing) - The reason we didn't tell anyone was because we didn't wanna
make a big deal out of it. - But it is a big deal! I have to tell someone.
- No, no, no, no, no! You can't.
- Please, please! We just don't wanna deal
with telling everyone, okay? Please, just promise you won't tell. (audience laughing) - All right! Man, this is unbelievable! I mean, it's great, but-- - I know, it's great.
(giggles) - Aw, I don't wanna see that!
(audience laughing) You're upset because you
think I chose Ross over you! No! I knew you could take care
of yourself, you know? I mean, Ross, he needs help. He's not street like us.
(audience laughing) - When it comes down to it, you would risk your life for
Ross before you would for me. That's the bottom line. - No, not exactly. All right, look, I wasn't
trying to save Ross. Okay? My sandwich was next to Ross. (audience laughing) All right? I was trying to save my sandwich. - From a bullet? (audience laughing) - I know it doesn't make much sense. - Much sense? - Look, Chandler, it was instinct, okay? I just went for it! - So you risked your life for a sandwich? - I know it sounds crazy, but Chandler, this is the greatest
sandwich in the world! (audience laughing) - So you didn't choose Ross before me. - No! I would never do that! You're like my brother! - Really? - Yeah! - Please tell me you got the message. - What message? - The actor playing Mac couldn't do it. They needed to see you at two o'clock. - What? It's six o'clock! - I wrote it on the board! I wrote it on the board then I went all over New
York City looking for you. I went to Ross's, I went
to the coffee house, I went to any place that
they made sandwiches. - I can't believe this, Chandler! - Sorry, I don't know what to say. - Well, you might say, "Congratulations." I saw the board, I went to
the audition, I got the part! (audience laughing) - Is that supposed to be funny? I was really worried over here. - Oh, well-- - You know, sometimes that
fake out thing is just mean. - Oh, wow. Okay, man, I'm sorry. - I did not mean to make you feel bad. - Well, that's good, because you didn't, and I'm incredibly happy for ya! - That's mean! (audience laughing) You really had me going there! - Oh, we could do this all day. - Yeah, you're right.
(audience laughing) Okay, look, listen. Let's talk about what a
huge star I'm gonna be. - You are gonna be a huge star. I'm gonna hug ya!
- You hug me. - All right!
(audience laughing) - We are gathered here today to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. I've known Monica and
Chandler for a long time and I cannot imagine two people
more perfect for each other. And now, as I've left my
notes in my dressing room, (audience laughing) we shall proceed to the vows. I miss this. - I don't think we've
actually done this before. - No, no, I miss hanging out with you. - We still hang out.
- Not like we used to. Remember you and me
used to be inseparable. And now, it's like, things are different. - Well, you know, things are different. I'm married now.
- Yeah, sure. And hey, don't get me wrong,
I am so happy for you guys. But I just, I miss hanging
out just us, you know? - Yeah, I miss that, too. I'll tell you what. From now on, we'll make time
to hang out with each other. - You got it! Come here.
(chuckles) - Yeah, I'm gonna be a junior copywriter. (cheering) - Oh, my God!
- Congratulations! Oh, sweetie, I'm so proud of you! - Does that mean I get
the good loving tonight? - You bet! No TV or anything! (audience laughing) - Hey, that is so great about the job! - Thanks, man.
- And I'd like to think I had a little something to do with it. - Really? Why? - Well, before with the wishbone, I didn't wish we would win the lottery. I wished you'd get the job. - Oh, yeah? Listen, don't tell Monica, she'll rip your heart right out. - Oh, yeah.
(audience laughing) - Now that you're okay with the house, do you wanna go see your room? - What? I get my own room? - You don't think we'd buy a house and not have a Joey room, do ya? - Oh, my God! Oh! Can I have an aquarium, and a sex swing? (audience laughing) - No.
- No. - Why not? I'll keep the tank clean. (audience laughing) I'm gonna miss these little guys. It was nice having birds around again. (birds chirping) - Hey, you know what? Maybe we should keep 'em here with you. - What? - Yeah, I mean, we've got
a lot going on right now. And plus, here they'd have their own room. - I could get a goose! (audience laughing) - You know, I think you're
set with the poultry. (audience laughing) - Thanks, man. Ya hear that you guys? You're gonna get to stay here! And it's good, you know, 'cause now you have a
reason to come visit. - I think there may be another reason. - So-- (audience laughing) Awkward hug or lame cool guy handshake? - Lame cool guy handshake. - Ooh, ooh!
- Ooh, ooh! (audience laughing) (cheerful music) (patting on the back)
