Chandler Bing's Best 1 Hour of Laugh Moments - Remembering the Legendary Matthew Perry

tell me what look at you you won't even look at him oh come on tell me I could use another reason why women won't look at me all right all right all right last night I had a dream that um you and I were uh doing it on this table wow excellent dream score why no one why would you dream that more importantly was I any good well you were pretty damn any good interesting cuz in my dreams I'm surprisingly inadequate well last night you seem to know your way around the table I love it when we share you okay there I can't believe you two had sex in her dream I'm I'm sorry it was a one time thing I was very drunk and it was someone else's subconscious we make fire cook meat then put out fire by peeing no get invited back you you oh Joey Melody call said she's going to be late oh okay so how are things going with you two is she becoming your special someone I don't know she's uh she's pretty great yeah what do she think of your little science project what you think I'm going to tell a girl I like that I'm also seeing a cup man's got a point well the tough thing is she really wants to have sex with me crazy [Applause] you uh you don't believe in gravity well it's not so much that you know like I don't believe in it you know it's just I don't know lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed uhoh it's Isaac Newton and he's pissed ADM it CH you have no backand excuse me little one I have a very solid backhand shielding your face and shrieking like a girl is not a backhand I was shrieking like a marine all right here watch me execute the three PS of championship play Power Precision and pach you broke a little girl's leg no I feel horrible okay says here that a muppet got whacked on Sesame Street last night where exactly were you around kenish I'm going to go see her I want to bring her something what do you think she'd like maybe a Hello Kitty doll the ability to walk I'm going to get back to retraining all right see you guys look out kids he's coming okay that's like the least fun game ever well I'm really sick of your smoking so I brought something that is going to help you quit oh nope that patch is no [Laughter] good on it's a hypnosis tape this woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasn't smoked since what's your problem nothing it's just that hypnosis is beyond crap Ross I watched you get hypnotized in Atlantic City hey that guy did not hypnotize me okay okay all right cuz you always pull your pants down on the count of three and play wipe out on your butt cheeks all right you forget hypnosis the way to quit smoking is you have to dance naked in a field of Heather and then bathe in the sweat of six healthy young men or what my father calls Thursday night all right we have a tie luckily I have prepared for such an event the lightning round [Applause] 30 seconds all the questions you can answer you guys are dead I am so good at lightning rounds I majored in lightning rounds all right we're going to destroy you I want to bet I'm so confused as to what we've been doing so far oh you she gives the worst massages ever okay it was like she was torturing me for information and I wanted to give it up I just I didn't know what it was Chan if it really hurts that bad you should just tell her look for the first time in my life I'm in a real relationship okay I'm not going to screw that up by you know telling the truth who dude look look out dude you almost crushed my hat sorry and the bunny got away [Music] hey will you grab me a crawler sit down will you go to the hospital dude perne operations cost like a lot probably okay besides it's it's getting darker and more painful that means it's healing I will loan you the money just go to the hospital and let's just get that thing pushed back in thank you but it would take me forever to pay that money back and I don't want that hanging over my head okay besides soon as my insurance kicks in I get all the free operations I want okay I think I'll probably start with that laser eye surgery to hey hey hey what's going on well Joey's got a really bad hernia but it's nothing that a little laser eye surgery won't fix so I thought Joey and I would be okay once we hung out but it's like we don't even know how to be with each other anymore I know it's tough now but things will get better how do you know that what if it just gets worse and worse and worse to the point where we can't even be in the same room with each other I'm not great at the advice can I interest you in a sarcastic comment some cheese go ch ch come on come on come on hi bring this party but I've got resum effect before work tomorrow ra ra we got to settle settle what the Jamestown Colony of Virginia you see King George is giving us the land so basically you get your yayas by taking money from all of your friends yeah yes and I get my yayas from Ikea you have to put them together yourself but they cost a little less 99 100 ready or not here I come all right let's go over the concept one more time Chandler Patrick just uh ended things with me did you or did you not tell him that I was looking for a serious relationship I did I absolutely did you idiot I'm sure you're right but why hey where where the hell are Joey and Molly I asked you to watch them I'm sorry I got a little preoccupied look we have to stop them before something happens right behind you big got I got her machine her answering machine no interestingly enough her leaf blower picked up all right somebody kiss me somebody kissed me it's midnight somebody kiss somebody kiss me it's midnight it's one hey what are you doing nothing you built a fort didn't you don't close it the keys are in there oh no no no no what's going on my lighters in there she's a person you can do it oh please could she be more out of my league Ross back me up here he can never get a woman like that in a million years thank you buddy come on Ross look I don't have any brothers I'm never going to get to be a best man you can be the best man when I get married I'm never going to going to get to be your best man we'll flip for it ducks or clowns oh we're going to flip for the baby you got a better idea all right call it in here heads heads in this yes we have to assign heads to something right okay okay uh Duck's heads because ducks have heads kind of scary ass clowns came to your birthday hey that monkey's got a Ross on his ass Joy told you about the leg huh uh-huh oh God it freaked me out okay I know it shouldn't have but it did I mean I like her I don't want to stop seeing her but every so often it's like hey you know what where's your [Music] leg hey hey good looking [Music] all right I'll leave my bed's so boring I know it's tough now but things will get better how do you know that what if it just gets worse and worse and worse to the point where we can't even be in the same room with each other I'm not great at the advice can I interest you in a sarcastic comment some cheese you'd think that would embarrass me but you see I'm maxed out wait right there oh no no no I'm I'm paddling away you got your passport yeah my third drawer in my dresser you don't want to lose that oh there it is no no no no what is it seriously is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me uh uh well dear God this this parachute is a napsack want to hear something I heard this Donald Duck never wore pants but whenever he's getting out of the shower he always puts a towel around his waist I mean what is that about Monica and I had a grandmother who died you both went to her funeral FAL name that grandmother n she has a real name ala ala what are you doing I took a shot you're shooting with ala ala is correct ni shooting I don't think this town is big enough for the both of us to relax in draw I wasn't doing anything very bad Chandler what are you doing Chandler oh my God you're smoking again well actually yesterday I was smoking again today I'm I'm smoking still oh that's great with my luck that's going to be him him him Ross nope him uh 253 his eyes are on the sparrow can you hear anything oh yeah somebody just said can you hear anything hey where's Joey Joey ate my last stick of gum so I killed him you think that was wrong uh I said a little bit Ross now how about you Chandler well Joey I'm a head hunter I hook up outof work Soviet scientists with Rogue third world Nations hi Rasputin excellent you're younger already yeah I think I broke my hip I check out this bad boy 12 megabytes of ram 500 megabyte hard drive built-in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 BPS wow what are you going to use it for games and stuff okay I'm officially unpacked thanks for helping me man Joe well I guess Joey home oh and look there is still one box that I have to unpack well I got you oh my God you almost gave me a heart attack [Music] oh well I see you've had a very productive day don't you think the cowboy hats a little much come on it's fun [Applause] all right is this a woman's hat dude stop talking crazy and make us some tea oh my God what are you all right yeah what happened oh man he promised he wouldn't take the chairs what the hell happened how are you locked in there where the hell's all of our stuff well this guy came by to look at the unit and and he said he didn't think it was big enough to fit a grown man you got involuntarily I was trying to make a SA H oh man if I ever run into that guy again you know what I'm going to do bend over there is a little child inside this man yes the doctors say if they remove it he'll die and sometimes I'll want you to steal third and I'll go like this I just feel like someone reached down my throat grabbed my small intest and pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck cookie you're uh you're going to leave me like this knowing you're here waiting for me I think that's kind of exciting don't you okay but if you don't come back soon there's pretty much nothing I can do about it what's going on we were just wondering if Chandler's girlfriend's a girl no well just ask her how long she's going to live women live longer than men how do you not fall down more someone at work ate my sandwich well what did the police say only uh I couldn't I got the stage fright I wanted to help but there was just too much pressure so so I uh I turned to Chandler um would you like to call somebody yeah about 300 guys I went to high school hey Phoebe here with the cab yet yeah she she brought the invisible cab hop in what do you want to do for dinner well we could just stay in and cook for ourselves oh and it gets [Laughter] worse oh my God you can do a duet of Ebony and Ivory all by yourself where's Chandler oh he needed some time to grief I'm free so now what exactly is the point of the Box Chandler the meaning of the box is three-fold one it gives me the time to think about what I did two it proves how much I care about my friendship with Joey and three it hurts hi nice to meet you and Joey hey Joey my brother Ross hey Rachel that's Chandler how do you do oh I'll get it gotcha with me see I'm not completely devoid of sentiment see I have feelings okay fine you can't tell but I'm trying to break the T I by mooning you guys Crown control to Maj commencing countown engines [Music] on are you gentler are you Joey New York says she wants to see all the tourist spots the you know Statue of Liberty and Empire State Building those places there's always some many people and they're being coralled like cattle and you know there's always some idiot who goes moo well if it annoys you so much then why do you do it thanks so much for taking me to all those places I had a great time oh I'm glad listen I want to apologize about Chandler though I I just did not see this coming New York is awesome let's see okay uh is that her oh my God yes who is she Julie grb my Camp girlfriend did you break up with her no we're still together you were going to go across the hall and look you don't you don't do that every year do you yeah you don't like go into the back of my closet and look under my gym Bing no never do that because that's for Joey gave me some SS of store that I've never seen before in my life okay that did not just happen okay should we get some coffee sure where Chandler you will love him he is without a doubt the funniest guy I have ever met I'm funny right what do you know you're a door you just like knock knock jokes save it for inside in fact I'll bet you 50 bucks you can't go the whole year without making fun of us you know what better get a week I'll take that bet my friend and you know what paying me the 50 bucks can be the new thing you do that day and it starts right now your new thing for today yes it is see Elizabeth horn swaggle that's right Elizabeth horn swaggle horn swaggle R wearing leather pants does nobody else see the Ross is wearing leather pants someone comment on the pants I think they're very nice I really like them a lot okay here feebs flying a jet better make it a spaceship so you can get back to your home planet and a phone call for you today Tom Jones he wants his pants back and horn swaggle what are you dating a character from frago Rock Chandler is a great name in fact yes I'm I'm sorry I know you really wanted me to name the baby joey but so I'm I'm going to I'm going to name the baby Chandler really yeah but you have to keep the name too okay thanks okay you want to hug it out yeah yay yay Oh yay okay I'm going to go tell Frank and Alice right now bye fee okay bye if you ask me as long as you got this job you got nothing pushing you to get another one you need the fear the fear he's right if you quit this job you then have motivation to go after a job you really want well then how come you're still at a job that you hate I mean why don't you quit and get the fear because I'm too afraid I was in her uh home act class and he was my best student yes she was my best teacher a if that doesn't keep kids in school what will you seen Joey what's the matter oh just [Applause] this you know what it's my fault really because the couch is where we usually keep the varnish hi Ken Adams nice to meet you Regina fangi I just don't get it we didn't do anything wrong I know although you did tell an awful lot of jokes I thought you said those jokes were funny joke joke ch ch Jo Jo well maybe it was all of your questions what about my questions the sheer volume it was like flying with the Riddler oh I'm sorry was that another joke was that another question did you have a question on me when you first met me yeah sure can you people not see me you know I don't like to brag about it but I give like the best massages all right then massage me ight nice ah ah ah so good isn't it so good I don't know what I've done to deserve it say goodbye to store muscles goodbye muscles hey shaving no rabies water orange juice and what looks like cider taste it yep it's fat I drank fat yeah I know I did that 2 minutes ago excuse me hi yes well you're kind of sitting in my seat what do you mean your seat I I mean I was sitting there but you got up but I never left the room but you left the chair area all right that's it give me your underwear I'm really sick of your smoking so I brought something that is going to help you quit oh nope that patch is no good I think this is the episode of Three's Company where there's some kind of misunderstanding oh sorry did I get you no you didn't get me it's an electric drill you get me you kill me calm down do you want this unit or not I do not want this unit W you should have told me that before not a mind read and we're out of beer okay I'm going to mon fine all right we figured you might respond this way so we have a backup offer oh no no no no more offers you can't offer anything to us let us keep the apartment and as a thank you Rachel and I will kiss for one minute totally worth it that was one good minute good night good night stop stop stop oh I'm sorry do you need a break my boot's in tan hey can you get a little closer so I can see the price I can see it from right here it'll cost you one husband okay I'm sorry I think I I can walk the rest of the way now just just give me my boots I don't have your boots well I don't have them either where are they well why don't you check in one of my saddle bags while I chew on a bail of hay okay what next blow a bble a bubble's good it's got a uh boyish charm it's impish here we go whose little ball of paper is this oh that would be mine see uh I wrote a note to myself and then I realized I didn't need the notes so I baled it up and now I wish I was dead can you guys please try to keep it down we're trying to start a ble tournament CH these people find out they're playing spelling games over there there'll be nobody left at our [Music] parler you're smoking what are you doing hey shut up you're not my real mom hey I got you a present oh my goodness where did you hide it I got it for your wedding and I ordered it weeks ago and it finally got here beeps you didn't have to get us anything for our wedding you already did so I love it it's huge let's open it open it it's the M half band machine oh my God I didn't know where to put it so I just left it here for now oh well maybe we can put it in the guest bedroom yeah okay I kind of like it here this sucks when I had insurance I could get hit by a bus or or catch on fire you know but it wouldn't matter now I got to be careful I'm sorry man there's never a good time to have to stop catching on fire year was supposed to be great well it's only the second day and I'm a loser with stupid leather pants that don't even sh no you're not a loser loser loser look at me if you ever hurt my little sister if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind I will hunt you down and kick your ass what I'm I'm I'm [Laughter] serious okay dude stop it okay I'm I'm not kidding here hey I hear what you're saying okay and thanks for the warning no problem so are we friends again yeah okay you won't believe what Monica's older brother just said to me it's Chandler let me in go away way I don't want to see anybody I know I went to the tanning place and the same thing happened to me you have to let me in really did you count mississippily you you're not tan no I just had to get a picture of this I'll see you later Monica dies then I would get Emma right so if Monica's not around I'm not good enough to raise Emma no that that is not what we're saying yeah he's lying he looked down well what is wrong with me am I am I incompetent because I managed to survive whatever it is to kill the three of you hey dude you okay sorry about before Oh no that's okay you're totally right I don't know anything about disciplining a child but it did hurt my feelings and I want you to know that if I die you don't get Joey you guys are dead I am so good at lightning rounds I majored in lightning rounds all right we're going to destroy you I want a bet I'm so confused as to what we've been doing so far what's the matter with you mean guys at the coffee house my hat no kid it was ridiculous you know these guys they were bullies actual bullies you know we're grown-ups this kind of stuff isn't supposed to happen anymore come on no oh no wait a minute I have no one you sent me here to give Ben some presents remember what how you standing here huh hey hey those guys are taking our stuff he get out the way God that was that was amazing that was incredible you guys you guys kicked butt us what about you guys man you really Bing gave it to all Mr Clean back there he was a big guy yeah he was wasn't he I wouldn't know having missed everything oh don't do that to yourself any one of us could have tripped over that little girl's jump rope so listen guys we uh are we okay here we're okay right okay so can I have my hat back no what Rachel could I see you for a moment Chandler you got yourself into those cuffs you get yourself out of them no no no no no no I can't get myself right out of them you must have me confused with the amazing Chandler you were in trouble either way okay if she comes in and sees me locked to this instead of the chair she's going to know you were in here so you might as well just let me go what if I clean your bathroom for a month still wouldn't be clean all I want is my freedom foot rubs for a month Freedom I'll take all of your photos and I'll put them into photo albums freedom I want my freedom why won't you hear me Sophie help me help me sopie sit no you just calm down I'm going to say this for the last time would you please just hey I'm sorry we don't have your sheep hey he so what happened did a forest tick you off no you know how we're always saying we need a place for the mail yeah well I started building one but then I decided to take it to the next step you're building a post office no an entertainment unit with a mail cubby built right in it's a one- day job Max okay my word those are snug oh yeah the my old work pants Sergio lente power saw kind of got away from you there oh hey Chandler when you see Frankie tell him Joey triani says hello he'll know what it means you sure he's going to be able to crack that code Marcel where you going with that disc you are not putting that on again Marcel if you press that button you are in very very oh yeah what thises this play right and I'm up for the part of this real cool like sve International guy a real cloth horse so I figure everyone at the audition is going to be wearing this kind of you know Ultra hip high fashioned Stu and you're going to make them all disappear yeah you could find something as sophisticated as this done oh no now it's not going to make any sense R didn't get the inment we are still married what oh my God Ross okay maybe it wasn't my best decision but I just couldn't face another failed marriage okay let me just jump in and ask at what point did you think this was a successful marriage well see now that I can see crying over but Bambi is a cartoon you didn't cry when Bambi's mother died yes it was very sad when the guy stopped drawing the deer about a bet Winner Takes all oh we can end up with nothing or you can end up with everything oh I like that all right so what do you say no just do it oh oh I'm convinced okay I can get this open anybody get a coat hanger oh I do oh no wait AE minute I took it out of my shirt when I put it on this morning there she is some girl ate Monica shut up the camera adds 10 lb huh so how many cameras are actually on you thank you but it would take me forever to pay that money back and I don't want that hanging over my head okay besides soon as my insurance kicks in I get all the free operations I want okay I think I'm probably start with that laser eye surgery hey hey hey what's going on well Joey's got a really bad hernia but it's nothing that a little laser eye surgery won't fix he sees this don't move and don't look at [Music] [Music] him what it comes down to is you would risk your life for Ross before you would for me that's the bottom line what no not exactly all right look I I wasn't trying to save Ross okay my sandwich was next to Ross all right I I was trying to save my sandwich from a bullet I know it doesn't make much sense much sense Chandler it was Instinct okay I just went for it so you risk your life for a sandwich I know it sounds crazy but Chandler this is the greatest sandwich in the world what should I wear to a Nick's game uh a t-shirt that says I don't belong here don't you go see Frankie my family's been going to him forever he did my first suit when I was 15 no wait 16 no excuse me 15 all right when was 1990 okay you have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance you know what I think we can go out there I mean they have more important things to worry about yeah we'll be fine look Rachel I wanted to tell you I thought I should I I did and then Chandler and Jo we convinced me not to wax the door shut we're never leaving up there cuz it's a television show Drake what are you getting at I'm not Drake that's right he's not Drake he's Hans raore Drake zil [Laughter] twin is this true yes yes it is true and I know this because because he pretended to be Drake to to sleep with [Music] me and then he told me he would run away with me and he didn't and you left the toilet seat up you bastard I'm so going to get back at Ross oh yeah this will show them here we go what are you doing oh you'll see my [Music] friend I'm dead I'm So Young posting that I died that really isn't funny well how you died was funny oh please hit by a blimp it kills over one American amans every year hold on there's something different I went to that tanning place your wife suggested was that place the sun oh Australopithecus isn't supposed to be in that display no no no no homohabilis was erected Australopithecus was never fully erect well maybe he was nervous all right so I'm back in high school I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria and I realize I am totally naked then I look down and I realize there is a phone there instead of that's right never had that all of a sudden the phone starts to ring and it turns out it's my mother which is very very weird because she never calls me I just feel like someone reached down my throat grabbed my small intestine pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck cookie I just want to be married again and I just want a million dollars all right kids I got to get to work if I don't input those numbers doesn't make much of a difference unless you happen to catch the we On's production of Pinocchio look chupo I'm a real live boy I will not take this abuse you're right I'm sorry once I was a wooden boy little whose little ball of paper is this oh that would be mine see uh I wrote a note to myself and then I realized I didn't need the note so I bald it up and now I wish I was dead chaylor you're an only child right you didn't have any of this well no although I did have an imaginary friend who my parents actually [Music] preferred I opened it up and there it was just floating in there like this tiny little hitchhiker well maybe it's a contest you know like collect all five where's Joey Joey ate my last stick of gum so I killed him do you think that was wrong that's it I'm getting cigarettes I don't care I don't care game's over I'm weak I've got to smoke I've got to have the smoke if you never smoke again I'll give you $7,000 yeah all right what's wrong with the 20th 11 days before Halloween all the good costumes are gone uh-oh what there was Ice there that night with Carol plastic seats 4,000 angry Pittsburgh fans we've been here for over an hour and a lot of people less sick than my friend have gone in I mean that guy with the toe thing who's he sleeping with oh come on Dora don't be mad I know we both said some things we didn't mean but that doesn't mean we still don't love each other you know I I feel like I've lost her you guys can pee standing up we can okay I'm trying that so Saturday night the big night date night Saturday night Saturday night no plans huh not a one called me young lady ooh I hate when my father calls me [Music] that here's the thing Janice you know I mean it's like we're different you know I'm like the bing bing bing you're like the boom boom boom Oh my God I'm so sorry are you okay ow um it's just my lens It's My Lens um I'll your I'll your right back I hit her in the eye I hit her in the eye this is the worst breakup in the history of the world oh my God okay how many of those have you had oh I don't know a million yes hi um okay next word would be uh Chandler Chandler is my name and uh hi yes you said that yes yes I did but what I didn't say was what I was about to say what I wanted to say was uh would you like to go out with me sometime thank you good night tell me one of your stories all right once once I got on the subway right and it was at night and I wrote it all the way to Brooklyn just for the hell of it roommates my eyes my eyes it's Andrew [Laughter] I know there'll be many moments in the years to come when I'll regret asking the following question but and Andrew is would you like to call somebody yeah about 300 guys I went to high school I'm [Music] in with Jill Grier what a TR in an ATM VES with Jill wer I have no idea what you just said put Joey on the phone what's up man I'm chur in an ATM with J oh my God he's trapped in an ATM vestibule with chill good CH listen listen yeah like that thought never entered my mind do you like some gum oh is it sugarless sorry it's not oh then no thanks what the hell was that mental note if Jill goodaker offers you gum you take it if she offers you mangled animal carcass you take it you know what second thought gum would be Perfection gum would be Perfection gum would be Perfection could have said gum would be nice could have said I'll have a stick but no no no no no for me gum is perfection I loathe myself all right okay what next blow a bubble a bubble's good it's got a uh boyish charm it's imp fish here we [Laughter] go nice going imp okay okay it's okay all I need to do is reach over and put it back in my mouth good save we're back on track I'm chewing someone else's gum this is not my gum oh my God oh my God and now you're choking are you all right oh my God you're choking out of my league I could get a Brian if I wanted to get a Brian I could get a Brian hey Brian and this from the the crime for Health Department are you wearing makeup yes I am as of today I am officially Joey triani actor/model thank you that's so funny cuz I was thinking you look more like Joey triani man/woman Underdog has gotten away the balloon no no the actual cartoon character hey that monkey's got a Ross on his ass too many jokes must mock Joey nice shoes huh die you killing me I'm sorry I'm sorry you just barged in here you don't knock you have no respect for anybody's privacy no you wait this is ridiculous privacy say one thing what what that's a relatively open weave and I can still see your nipular area I don't know why you're so embarrassed they were very nice boobies nice they were nice I mean that's it I mean mittens are nice okay rock hard place me come on I I'll show you to my room that sounds so weird when it's not followed by no thanks it's late hey kicky what are you doing just trying to get comfortable can't sleep in my underwear well you're going to if I turn into my parents I'll either be an alcoholic blonde chasing after 20-year-old boys or I'll end up like my mom they got to work no way it's suicide the man's got an egg how do I look oh um I don't care there's lorine okay now remember no trading you get the pretty one I get the mess here's my credit card dinner's on me I'm sorry chanler I hope she throws up on you oh man in my next life I'm coming back as a toilet brush he showed me where the restaurant's going to be it's it's it's this cute little place on 10th Street it's not too big it's not too small it's just right was it formerly owned by a blonde woman and some bears 8 and 1/2 hours of aptitude tests intelligence tests personality tests and what do I learn you were ideally suited for a career in data processing for a large multinational corporation maybe this will cheer you up oh you know um I had a grape about 5 hours ago so I better split this with you Helen could you come in here for a moment thank you Helen that'll be all last time I do that I promise I've got to go I've got Lama's class oh and I've got earth science but I'll catch you in Jim say you never feel like a father mhm say your son never feels connected to you as one say all of his relationships are affected by this do you have a point you know you think I would the doctor got the K out he also found an m and oh we think he was trying to spell out monkey ra ra we got to settle settle what the Jamestown Colony of Virginia you see King George is giving us the land yeah we're going to go take a bath yes we are aren't we yes we are they're still just friends right I figured after work I'd go pick up a bottle of wine go over over there and uh try to woo her hey you know what you should do you should take her back to the 1890s when that phrase was last used you're a monkey you're loose in the city where do you go okay it's his first time out so he's probably going to want to do some of the touristing things I'll go to cats you go to the Russian Tea Room okay from now on you don't get to talk to other people got her machine her answer machine no interestingly enough her leaf blower picked up hello hello hello can I use the phone you've got to do something about the humping what it's it's just a phas well that's what we said about Joey I can't believe you two had sex in her dream I'm I'm sorry it was a one time thing I was very drunk and it was someone else's subconscious how young is Young Ethan young our age when we were can you hear that yeah see that'll stop when you pick up the phone see it pays to know the man who wears my shoes me I don't sound like that that is so not true that is so not that is so not that oh shut up you know sometimes just things don't work out and this has nothing to do with the fact that he needs a note to get out of gym what is that for the ride oh yeah like in a cab save it okay hating this seriously is there something fundamentally unmar arable about me uh uh well dear God this this parachute is a napsack somebody want to help me trying to rip out my heart uh oh that's great anybody seen a nipple men are here we make fire cook meat then put out fire by peeing no get invited back well the tough thing is she really wants to have sex with me crazy there is a little child inside this man yes the doctors say if they remove it he'll die I can't believe he remembered well sure but can you play it on a plane his flight doesn't leave for another 45 more minutes what about the time difference from here to the airport yes 700 bucks all right you did it do we have any fruit it's really 6:00 tomorrow night our time okay well listen don't tell us what's going to happen though cuz I like to be surprised anybody know a good tailor you need some clothes altered no no I'm just looking for a man to draw on me with Chuck yo paon can I talk to you for a sec your tayor is a very bad man Frankie what are you talking about hey what's going on Joey's Taylor took advantage of me what no way I've been going to the guy for 12 years oh come on he said he was going to do my inseam then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite what cupping uh-oh it's Isaac Newton and he's pissed and now I have to get a snake uhuh why is that if I'm going to be an old lonely man I'm gonna need a thing you know a hook like that guy in the subway who eats his own face so I figure I'll be crazy man with a snake you know crazy snake man and I'll get more snakes call them my babies kids won't walk past my place they will run run away from crazy snake man no man I sure miss Julie Spanish midgets Spanish midgets wrestling Julie okay yes I see how you got yeah I will have the Cajun Catfish anything else yes how about a verse of Killing Me Softly You're Going to sneeze on my fish aren't you no uh-uh no way sorry not going to happen whoa whoa prom night flashback can I uh see [Music] something what if my own baby hates me how what am I going to do then Monica would you stop this is nuts do you know how long it's going to be before you actually have to deal with this problem I mean you don't even have a boyfriend yeah Joey she does not look fat Ducks his heads because ducks have heads kind of scary ass clowns came to your birthday okay let's do [Music] it what nothing just never seen your little stretchy pants before and we're changing ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow Phoebe here with the cab yet yeah she she brought the invisible cab hop in where's my seat belt oh no no that side doesn't have one the paramedics had to cut through it hey hey ho ho ho holy crap is it hot in here you got me a Cola drink and a lemon lime you know this is actually good because if we ever lose Ross we have a spare I can't decide between lamb or duck well of course Lambs are scarier otherwise the movie would have been called Silence of the Ducks guess what I got rhythm I figured I'd go and then drive down to the zoo and surprise Marcel you know I think you will be surprised till he realizes he's a monkey and uh you know isn't capable of that emotion yes hitting her with a frying pan is a good idea we might want to have a backup plan though just in case she isn't a cartoon and you left the toilet seat up you bastard nice camouflage man for a minute there I almost didn't see it and who knows if things go well maybe this time I'll get to see your [Music] underwear no one was around to hear that have you ever worn women's underwear well Yes actually but uh they were my aunt ednas and there were three of us in there how come all I can think about is putting that ice in my mouth and licking you all over because I went to an all boys high school and God is making up for it I want you right here right now right now right here don't you think we're in kind of a public play they do have the shrimp meet me in the bathroom I'm going to the bathroom now all right look Ross I'll give you $50 for your underpants hey hey [Applause] [Music] [Applause] wow I don't know what to say wow I I don't know what to say he what do you say I don't know you have any idea what this will do for your sex life well it'll probably slow it down at first but once I get used to the extra weight I'll be back on track what oh this is excellent you know he could have got me a VCR he could have got me a set of golf clubs but no he has to get me the woman repeller the eyesore from the liberachi house of crap I promise I will never take it off my wrist but if if you want to stay in there and be mad you know you just uh you stay in there you know what I am here on my knees holding up these couch cushions as a symbol of my sorrow and regret much like they did in biblical times though you may have it anger now check it out with bracelet bues that's what they'll call us shut up the camera adds 10 lb H so how many cameras are actually on you pizza's on the way I told you we wouldn't have to get up what if we have to [Music] pee I'll cancel the sodas I'm getting a lily for my mom cuz her name is Lily wow that's lucky what if her name was big ugly splutch I've already got an an apartment that I love well it wouldn't kill you to say it once in a while I don't want to leave you high and dry hey no I've never been low or a wetter Hey Joe when'd you start using moose in your hair tandler obviously not their favorite pet Joey where's buddy buddy my fish buddy there was no fish when she dropped it off oh this is this is unbelievable I mean you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my intelligence by lying about it and then you kill my fish my buddy hey I didn't kill your fish look Eddie would you look at what I'm doing here now that can't be smart so we're just going to take this guy right off you and put him here in Mr pocket Tang Jello what are these raisins uh sure why [Laughter] not well that's not even a real fish no that's a Goldfish cracker what about last night when he went and got a drink of water and I was nice enough to hide behind the door what's that about huh I didn't realize that get out now okay you really want me out yes please okay then I want to hear you say it I want to hear you say you want me out I want you out no no no I want to hear it from your lips where did you hear it from before right get out get out get out get out get out get out get out what you move out take your your fruit your stupid small fruit and get out you want me to move out uhhuh I uh I got to tell you man I mean that's uh it's kind of out of the blue I mean know you think this is not out of the blue this is smack dab in the middle of the blue Eddie do you remember yesterday uh yes I think I vaguely recall it do you remember talking to me yesterday yes so is he house strange or is he going to leave little bathroom tiles all over the place stay stay good fake dog what just happened oh on no oh no wait a minute I have no one this couch belongs to us all right I'll tell you what you call the couch and then and then we'll call the couch and we'll see who it comes to let me just get this straight so we're uh strictly talking about The Middle come on okay so can I have my hat back no I mean I was in there just listening to them about each other all I kept thinking about was the 4th of July because it reminded you of the way our forefathers used to at each other well I wondered mine first yeah but I'm I'm so much faster hey Mr Douglas is looking for you why wh why why why is Mr Douglas looking for me because he has a strong suspicion that you dropped the ball on the lender project why why why why why does he suspect that yeah Karen I'm thinking about having an affair with her oh you know what I just did what the hell are you doing to me man oh it's not me it's my character Chandy yeah the road processor who seduces his co-workers wives for sport and then laughs about it the next day at the water cooler in fact I have her panties right there in my drawer really no freak Joe she's fictional had to kiss this guy because he was just so darn cute hey I'm sorry we don't have your sheep just ask her how long she's going to live women live longer than men how do you not fall down more where is she where is she oh hey I have a question where is she

Channel: Film in a Minute

Views: 713,317

Keywords: ChandlerBing, MatthewPerry, FriendsTVShow, ChandlerBingLegacy, MatthewPerryTribute, FriendsFarewell, CentralPerk, FriendsReunion, UnforgettableFriends, FriendsCast, ChandlerAndMonica, FriendsMemories, ChandlerBingQuotes, FriendsForever, MatthewPerryMagic, ChandlerChuckles, FriendsFlashback, FriendsNostalgia, RossGeller, RachelGreen, MonicaGeller, JoeyTribbiani, PhoebeBuffay, DavidSchwimmer, JenniferAniston, CourteneyCox, LisaKudrow, MattLeBlanc, RossandRachel, BestTVShowEver, ComedyClassic

Id: FL-Ws8br7YQ

Length: 71min 14sec (4274 seconds)

Published: Sun Oct 29 2023