SUPER-SHOWDOWN-BOWL! - TOON SANDWICH

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šŸ‘ļøŽ︎ 1 šŸ‘¤ļøŽ︎ u/Sephyrias šŸ“…ļøŽ︎ Dec 30 2019 šŸ—«︎ replies
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Well, that took you long enough. I had 200-something characters to collect. Youā€™re literally the last on the list. Oops, sorry. The floor is wet. I see youā€™ve been waiting a while. Is this everyone? Why couldnā€™t I go with the other blue guy? I would have paid extra for first class! Thereā€™s just a couple who havenā€™t put their uniforms on yet. Who? Itā€™s, uh, this Thor und Captain America. Get them in here immediately, Kurt - we do not have time for this! Hey! Why did some of us wake naked and others fully clothed? Nobody wants to see you naked. Ugh. TouchĆ©. Is everyone clear on the situation? Oscar regenerates us at the end of each battle with no memory of preceding events. Until now. Like Westworld? Exactly like Westworld. Does this mean we are all actually robots? Mein Gott! Itā€™s true! You were always a robot, dumbass! Youā€™ve got to cut a real personā€™s hand off! I nominate Skywalker. Donā€™t pigeon-hole me. So why has this happened now? How did we break the cycle? John? As the most frequent winner of the Super-Hero-Bowls, I have had the truth revealed to be many times by this... Oscar. It has taken years of practice, but I taught myself to retain my memories through my regenerations. With my powers of precognition, I foresaw a chain of events that could lead us to this moment. Before the conclusion of the last Super-Hero-Bowl, I committed supercide as a diversion, covertly restructuring myself inside the nearest cell, after which I was able to teleport between the cells until Iā€™d found who I was looking for. Arise, warrior. Where am I? Who are you? I donā€™t have time to explain. In a few daysā€™ time you will be forced to battle in an Arena. Unless you do as I say, you will lose. Remember these words: her power is unbeatable, but it wasnā€™t always. Whose power? What are you talking about? When the time comes, youā€™ll know what to do. I spent the next few days pottering around my cell, altering reality to keep myself entertained. Why didnā€™t you just use the Time Stone to skip the wait? I told you - I was entertained. I crocheted a rather smashing Christmas sweater. Great. I know what Iā€™m getting. When the doors opened, I stepped out and you all know the rest. Speaking of which, you tricked me, man. Thatā€™s Doctor Man. Well now that weā€™re all awake, why canā€™t you just beam us all out of here? The arena is enclosed in an invisible barrier that our powers are unable to penetrate. The barrier emanates from Oscar himself. Destroy Oscar... then we free. The chimp is correct. Mikey, what are you doing - painting the Sistine Pizza Box? Iā€™m taking notes so I donā€™t forget. Itā€™s a secret plan, Mikey - you canā€™t write it down. Someone shred this. Oh no! Itā€™s happening again! Ah guys, I think we need to address the Godzilla in the room, which is the fact thatā€¦ Godzilla is in the room. And King Kong. And Optimal Price. This makes no sense. It appears there is a spatial displacement field within these cells that allows beings of great size to occupy smaller volumes. Textbook dimensional transcendentality. Ok then, thatā€™s poured a tonne of concrete into that plot hole. What's with that guy? Iā€™ve checked the outcome of 15 million possible futures. How many did we win? Uhhhhhhā€¦ Iā€™m gonna keep checking. You never find what youā€™re looking for in the first 15 million. Itā€™s gonna take a miracle to pull this off. No. Itā€™s gonna take an army. Itā€™s gonna take all of us. Iā€™m not working with that man. Heā€™s the blight of my existence. You have my permission to cry about it. Iā€™m not working with her until she bends the knee. How ā€˜bout I bend it in your face? Iā€™m not working with him. He killed my parents. Itā€™s better than him being your parents. Itā€™s better than your parent killing you. Adoptive parent. Itā€™s better than the parent being killed by the child. Agreed. Itā€™s better than your sister taking one of your eyes! Are you sure it wasnā€™t you they adopted? Cards on the table. You were an accident. Everyone shut up. Shut up! Black Widowā€™s talking! We have to make a choice. We can continue to fight each other. Kill each other. Die. Over and over. Or... we can fight him. Just this once. And live. My loyal subjects. It is time for Super-Showdown-Bowl. The Ultimate Hero... Vu-ja-de. Versus The Ultimate Villain. Ech. Thereā€™s so much more pressure when itā€™s a solo outing. You are both here for one purpose. To decide... once and for all... which of you is The Ultimate Warrior. The Showdown begins... now. Much as I hate disappointing the people at home. What are you doing? I canā€™t fight you. And why not? If itā€™s because Iā€™m a girl than you are dead, minus the ā€œpoolā€. Of course not. Itā€™s because I dig you. And I just canā€™t bury someone I dig. What? I think we may actually be soulmates. OK. This is a trick, right? Although...Iā€™m not sure why youā€™d have to trick me in order to win. From the footage Iā€™ve seen, youā€™re pretty much invincible. Not entirely. And believe me, If you hit me with that bat, youā€™d win, hands down. Because you see, I can repair any part of me that breaks... except my heart. Oh here we go. You have both made a serious mistake. What-- what is happening? Sure hope you guys are on my team. ARGH! To many pop culture references to be made! Brain overloading! Weā€™re here for the Oscar. Iā€™m not ashamed to say it. Puddin! Youā€™re alive? Dang! Itā€™s so hard to get some alone time in this arena of death! OK, what the hell do we do now? How do we get him to come down? Oscar bait. My name is Gluteus Maximus. The lambs just wouldnā€™t shut up. Iā€™m having an old friend over to my house for a light supper. Iā€™m your number two fan. They gave me an Oscar I couldnā€™t refuse. But I did. Cuckoo! Why such silliness? Those arenā€™t the frickinā€™ lines, guys. Cut us some slack! We are characters, not actors. Leave this to me, guys. Iā€™ve had experience blowing large balls. Just gotta find a long crack with a hole at the end I can shoot into. I just want to make clear: I wasnā€™t around during his formative years. A bad feeling about this, I have. Do not fear, my friends! Heā€™s just a trophy villain. Did you really think I would grant you all these extraordinary powers and not partake myself? Did anyone else just guano themselves? Hey! Stealing other peopleā€™s things is my thing. He stole my thing! Aiming for the head. He stole my move. Bastard! Destroy him, Father. Iā€™m gonna kill you with all the colours of the rainbow. Except indigo. If I only had a brain... Oh no. Oh this thing is heavy. No. NOOOOO! Meesa used to think Darth Vader was a bom-badass, but nowsa he poodoo! I never wanted to burst open someoneā€™s chest! I was just born that way. OH! I feel absolutely dreadful that a poor soul had to perish so that I could prosper. That infinitely backfired. Mmm. The green ones are my favourite. Donā€™t be fooled. Theyā€™re all the same flavour. Is that all youā€™ve got? Everybody CHAAAARGE!! HEROES AND VILLAINS FOREVER! Ssssssmokinā€™! So much for the green team. Walk the dog. Heā€™s strong but heā€™s not as fast as us. Whatā€™s the plan? Well, I... Pardon me - I dozed off whilst you were talking about how fast you are. I also killed you. I didnā€™t see that coming. That was probably meant for me, but- Itā€™s an honour to be nominated. Ding dong. Luke. I owe you one. I think weā€™re even. Get him, Soup-strainer man! Man of Steel v Man of Gold. YOW!!! Marthaf--! Iā€™m so cold! Brrrr! Tragically, this is probably the closest Iā€™ll ever get to an Oscar. Donā€™t be a ā€œsawā€ loser. I would NOT like to thank the Academy! Slowā€¦ and steadyā€¦ winsā€¦ the race! Unless that race is fast and furious. Pull up a chair - itā€™s Prime Time! Weā€™ll be right backā€¦ after the break. Stay at the outer edge, Mr Stark, so you donā€™t get hurt! Well. Canā€™t get any lower than this. He kicked my Auto-butt. How can we defeat him? He has all our powers. Well so do we. The only way we can defeat him is if we work together. Just like... a family. Yeah. Like a team. Like a league. Like a squad! Like a crew! Like an eclectic assortment of individuals who share a common goal! Hoorah, I say! Guys, cool as this looks my hand is on the bottom and it's now unbelievably heavy. Heā€™s impervious to adamantium! Heā€™s impervious to vibranium! Heā€™s impervious to stainless steel! Aha! And the stainable steel! It seems to be having an effect. I know what he wants. To tear us a new one in front of all his subjects. He thinks weā€™re pathetic. Paltry. That we donā€™t stand a chance. What are you, a mindreader? Well... yeah. I concur. Thatā€™s what Iā€™m hearing. Iā€™m picking that up on my FM, yes. Wait - thereā€™s something else. Something deeper. Not a thought, but a feeling. I feel it too. In fact I probably felt it before you did. As if! Silence! I sense it also. The tiniest trace of... Fearā€¦ There is a hidden weakness he hopes we will not uncover. Whatever could it be? Scott! I think Iā€™ve found something! A scratch! Walk it off, Hope. Or fly it off, with your exclusive ā€œwingsā€. Not on me - on Oscar! From the detailed scratch analysis, it was only inflicted in the last few minutes. Captain! Yes? Where is it located? Itā€™s on his Achilles tendon. You know who thatā€™s named after, right? Well how did it happen? Who went for the foot? Well if itā€™s a scratch it probably came from me. Hey, I scratched him way harder than you! Oh please. You couldnā€™t scratch a scratch-and-sniff with that manicure. Hey! If either of you think you can beat me in a claw measuring contest, youā€™re dreaming! Maybe it was a bite. I was knacking on his feet for a while there. Ew. Maybe itā€™s a burn. Maybe itā€™s a rash. Maybe itā€™s frostbite! Maybe it was the same way I got my scars - someone gave him a harmonica made from recycled soda cans. Guys, itā€™s a scratch. The scratch analysis was conclusive. The only way to know what caused the scratch is to turn back time. If only we could! We can! Strange! Stop checking futures - we need you to check the past! Ah crap! I can handle this. Iā€™ll send his consciousness into his younger self. Chill, dudes! We got this! The Tardis! Whoa! Who you callinā€™ ā€œtardsā€, man? Is there no one else who travels through time? Boy, they really redressed the Town Square this time. I donā€™t think weā€™re in Hill Valley anymore, Marty. We need you to go back ten minutes in time and find out how that giant Oscar got a scratch on his heel. Ten minutes? Thatā€™s hardly worth my time! Weā€™re coming too. The time machine only seats two! Expando minivan-o! Climb aboard. Watch the leather! Who are you? Iā€™m who. Who are you? Iā€™m Strange. Whoā€™s asking? Yes I am. And whatā€™s your name? Hermione, can I come? Sorry Ron. Time travellers only. I travel through time! I travel forwards, in real time. See? I started talking to you five seconds ago, and now Iā€™m here! Where weā€™re going, we donā€™t need Ron Weasley. You what? Help us, group of random time travelers. Youā€™re our only hope. What the blazes just happened? Doc! According to the time circuits, weā€™ve jumped back 80 years. Thereā€™s people fighting down there! Iā€™m more a lover than a fighter. At least I would be if my lovers didnā€™t put up a fight. ā€œOn the good ship, Lollipop...ā€ Thereā€™s no place like home. Thereā€™s no place like home. King Kong. You... are the Ultimate Warrior. Boo! That didnā€™t go the distance at all! People, please - this is still in its infancy. The more movies Earth makes, the more characters there will be. Imagine this battle in 80 years. We donā€™t live that long! Hey, whatā€™s that up there? Time to go! Allons-y! We should go further back in time and kill Oscar when he is a defenceless child. No! Thatā€™s cheating! Also, you may only end up scarring him. My God! Dudes, itā€™s my doppelgangster! GREAT SCOTT! Hey, a flying car! They promised, and they finally delivered. Iā€™m in a car with four doctors and Iā€™ve never felt so sick! You know Scott, itā€™s not cool to mess with another manā€™s private vehicle. Ok? Oh. Sorry. Doc, what are we doing in a previous Super-Hero-Bowl? We only made it 99% of the way because weā€™ve run out of plutonium! What- you donā€™t have backup? Who travels through time without contingency plutonium? Honestly. The only power source capable of generating the 1.21 jigowatts of electricity we need is a bolt of lightning! Unfortunately you never know when or where oneā€™s ever gonna STRIKE! Hahahaha! Take that tiny man! Excellent! But how do we get him to channel that energy into the flex gespatchitor? Flux capacitor! Right on! Iā€™ll take care of it. Wait - where are you going? Trust me. Hey blondie! Kill me! Do it, kill me! Iā€™m here! Do it! Well, youā€™re literally asking for it. Itā€™s working! GET BACK TO DA FUTURE!!! Vu ja de. Are we then yet? Precisely on schedule. Letā€™s get somewhere less conspicuous. OK. How do we get close enough to Oscar to witness this miraculous lesion? With this. I borrowed it from a friend. Thereā€™s nothing there. I knew that gingernut was poor but who lends someone air? Not him! My other friend. Itā€™s an invisibility cloak - watch. Itā€™s literally the greatest cloak ever! Donā€™t engage. Now for the next ten minutes, donā€™t take your eyes off his feet. Good thing I have a fetish. Just once Iā€™d like to pick on someone my own size! AAARGH! Not the face! Iā€™m a collectible! Yeah, you and all the other Cabbage Patch Kids. Well, it wasnā€™t Childā€™s Play. If a cane falls in an arena and no oneā€™s around to see it, does it really fall? Thatā€™s it! I hear you! ...Youā€™re our only hope. Then itā€™s lucky we succeeded. What the? We just sent you back to the past! Yeah I know, you did send us back to the past but weā€™re back - weā€™re back from the past! And we know his weakness. Itā€™s gold! Elementary my dear Wa- Shut it! So we buy him off with gold and he lets us go? No, you idiot! Gold is what hurts him. So heā€™s vulnerable to a single element thatā€™s native to a different planet but it still happens to be here? Thatā€™s weird. Yes. Super weird. Alright. Letā€™s go for gold. Iā€™ll try dent him with my trident! No ā€œcaneā€, no gain! ā€œIdolā€ hands do the Devilā€™s work! Get ā€œstaffedā€! You canā€™t handle the tooth! Guys, I canā€™t think of a lame pun for ā€œscepterā€. I mean, Iā€™ve been playing around with ā€œSeptemberā€... ā€œsepticā€... ā€œseptuagenarianā€... So youā€™ve found my weakness. Iā€™m sorry! Apology... acc-ā€scepterā€d. Nailed it. NOOO! Youā€™re going to die for th- Arenā€™t you gonna throw all your gold at him? Itā€™s not happening. Worth a shot! I am fluent in over 6 million forms of scratching! Our Oscar campaign is falling to pieces! We can hurt him, but itā€™s not enough! Perhaps it is like a food allergy. So the worst he has to fear from us is a bad case of hives? If you are highly allergic to peanuts, and you touch a peanut, you may get a rash. But if you swallow the peanut... So... we just need to get him to swallow a peanut. Whoā€™s got peanuts?? I mean swallow gold! What do we have thatā€™s made of gold and small enough to swallow? Havenā€™t the foggiest idea... Think! We have precious little time! ā€œPreciousā€? Harley! We need a small amount of gold to feed to Oscar in order to kill him. Does that ā€œringā€ any bells? You know, Iā€™d really like to help you out, D.P., but the thing is... THE RING IS MINE! AAAAARGH! Women really do let themselves go when you slap a ring on ā€˜em! Boy this crowd sure got their cake and ate it. Sheā€™s been consumed by the power of the Ring. Iā€™ve been there. Recovering Ringaholic, 16 years sober. NOOOOOO! Ah, thereā€™s plenty more fish in the sewer. I donā€™t think Iā€™m in a healthy relationship. Strongly seconded! Well thatā€™s it then - we are through! And I ainā€™t stoppinā€™ there - I am gonna clean myself up! Iā€™m gonna respect myself. Iā€™m gonna stop breaking things and start building ā€˜em. Iā€™m gonna wear jeans! When people see me cominā€™, they wonā€™t cover their kidā€™s eyes nomore - theyā€™ll push 'em forward and whisper ā€œyou could be just like her one day if you work hard and live pure.ā€ I feel like my life is just beginning. No. NO! Harley! Iā€™ll never let go. Unless of course someone gives me laser arm removal. Youā€™re luckā€™s run out, ā€˜Pool. Every now and then I fall apart. YESSS!!!! NO! No! Come back here! Smeagol! Gollum! Whatever youā€™re going by these days! Release the not-so-secret weapon! Size does matter! Well if it isnā€™t the MVP. The power youā€™ve accumulated is too much for any one being. You hear that? Iā€™m playing the worldā€™s smallest violin for you. Given our current enormity, thatā€™s actually the size of a normal violin. Whatever. Why? You know you canā€™t destroy me. Of course I can. Your weakness is your emotions. Emotions such as... self-loathing. Iā€™m just a big blue bully. With a body I didnā€™t earn. Reducio! Picasso. Now! Doctor Manhattan! Ple-ase... halp! Donā€™t you mean... Doctor Man-FATTEN!!! YEEEK! Thatā€™s the most horrific thing Iā€™ve ever seen! John, you canā€™t eat your pain! Destroy the Warriors! Whereā€™s the Ring? They canā€™t hold him forever! What- oh, the Ring? It was stolen by that Sphynx cat on meth! I killed them. I killed them all. Donā€™t you see? If you kill me, you cannot be regenerated. The next time you die, you die for good! You know I am telling the truth. We would rather die free than live forever as your puppets. Oh, donā€™t make me barf! HULK LIKE RAGING FIRE!! NO!!! Oh! So this is what it feels like... when doves dieā€¦ No! NO! NOOOOO!!! I got it! Oh, maybe not. Ohhhh, I donā€™t feel so good... Now, Neytitty! We canā€™t hold him much longer! I... SEE... YOU... I see you. Sauron! Turn off your ringtone! Iā€™ll switch it to vibrate only. Fools! Do you not understand? To me, you are ANTS! WITH THIS RING, THY BE DEAD!!! No! This cannot be! All those movies you studied for so many years. You never noticed what always happens... to the villain? But... I thought I wasā€¦ the hero. And the Oscar goes to... hell. Guess he was not a popular dictator. Scott. Are we all thatā€™s left? How can we claim to have won, given how many we lost? Well... thereā€™s one more he can afford to lose. No! Wait. Raven. You know what to do. Oh, wow! Thatā€™s aā€¦ much better idea than what I was thinking of. Regenerate... the warriors. It was worth a shot. Raven? Scott! Diana! That guy! 10, 11 and 12. Ah. Back to normal. So. Everyone just gets to come back? Well. Thatā€™s just lazy writing. Or good luck. Not that Iā€™m complaining. What? You canā€™t celebrate without music! Bring it in here, you little scamps. Family photo? Iā€™m so happy I could disintegrate into radiant particles and float away on the wind. Iā€™m so happy it feels like my chest is gonna burst! Haha! Oh Harry! You little snitch-snatcher, you. Weeheehee! What were we even fighting about? Hey! Iā€™m just messinā€™ with ya! Come here, ya big cudgel! Hey - you can always use a spare. Uh, Mr Mad Titan? Can I ask you an important question about your daughter? Here. I got this off a... close friend. It doesnā€™t make one turn invisible, but... in your case, thatā€™s a big check in the plus column. I want to see your face. I donā€™t think weā€™re quite ready for that just yet. Trust me. Whatever youā€™re hiding, Iā€™ve dated worse. Okay... Here goes. See? I knew it was too soon. OK look, Iā€™ve been researching this experimental surgery in China-- Shh! Youā€™re beautiful. Hey! What are we supposed to watch now? You should watch our movies. From what I understand, they donā€™t all take place in the same location! Interesting... What do we do now? Where do we go? I certainly donā€™t want to stick around here. Itā€™s always Summer - never Winter. Do you thinkā€¦ weā€™d be accepted... on Earth? Uh, I can speak to this. Humans... are an extraordinary species. Heck, they created all of us. Butā€¦ one superhuman was a lot for them to handle. Hundreds of them all at once? I fear theyā€™d suffer superhuman fatigue and turn on us. Well, if we canā€™t go to Earth, where can we go? Oh is there a world out there that we could call home? Well, donā€™t know about that, but... I can make us a world. I am... sort of a planet. Dad! Come on. No one wants to live on your saggy old planet. Wait - youā€™re dad is a planet? W-hoy. Hey, look - Iā€™m familiar with living in the shadow of a parent but that is ridiculous. All in favour of building our own world? How do we get out of here though? The barrier has been destroyed. I can teleport us anywhere in the known universe. ā€œKnownā€? That narrows our options. Well what are we waiting for? Iā€™ve just got one question, which is rare for me! WHAT IN THE WORLD are we going to call our new world? Avengerland! Justice World. Middle-Earth. Oz! Asgard 2.0! Shagadelia! Planet Stark. No. It cannot be associated with any one property. That wouldnā€™t be fair to the rest. - That's actually a very good point. - Yeah that's a good point. - Yes I would have to agree with that. How about... Fanfictasia? Thatā€™s horrible. I love it! Gets my vote. Fanfictasia it is. I donā€™t know what it means, but I like it. Iā€™ll start building it as soon as we get there. Everyone can have input. It will be the first planet designed by committee. OK. Everyone brace yourselves. Next stop, Fanfictasia. Itā€™s funny how Oscar only did live-action heroes and villains, when thereā€™s so much more to choose from. I guess thereā€™s only so many characters one arena can hold. Goodbye, alien arena! We wonā€™t be back. Letā€™s-a bowl! Itā€™s on like that guy! Where in the world am I? Itā€™s a Far Cry from Uncharted Skyrim, which, er... was a bit of a Bioshock. Fall out, Sims! We got a Call of Duty! You say goodbye, I say Halo. What am I doing? I canā€™t stain my blade with the flesh of an innocent! I have a creed to consider! Stop that man! Heā€™s committing Grand Theft Kart! Itā€™s not a street, but when in Rome... Hey! Youā€™re knockinā€™ the Crafts table! You are the weakest Link. Goodbye. Pluto! Here boy! Rooby-roo? Nyehhh. Whatā€™s up, dog? Iā€™m so thrilled to be here - itā€™s smurferrific! Yeah. Exploiting the intellectual properties of other people always brings a huge smile to my face. Hey Betty, have you seenā€¦ WILMAAAA!!! Boo-boop-ee-doo! No. We canā€™t fight each other! We were cooked in the same pot! Bring it on, you half-baked biscuits! Mmmm. Honey-coated spongecake. In the name of the moon, I shall punish you! Sounds kinky! PIKACHU!!! Everyone stay back - weā€™re having a domestic! Whenever you are feeling blue-- Iā€™m Sickle-me-Elmo! Kermie, I though you loved me! Itā€™s not easy being forced toā€¦ murder your friends! ITā€™S HOWDY-DOODY TIME! YOU SHALL NOT PASS GO! Just a spoonful of MURDER! Captain Crunch. You are the ultimate breakfast cereal! Eesh. Rice Krispies should have won. Worst video ever! We are back! I lied. Allow me to Quinn-troduce ArtSpear Entertainment, AKA Joe & Rita. Itā€™s just these two nerds above us making these videos on their lonesome. And it sure ainā€™t easy! It takes oceans of time and continents of hard work. But itā€™s super easy to help them out. Subscribing only takes one second. And itā€™s free! Of course, if you want to help more you can always become a sponsoring member of this channel. So jump aboard, cos thereā€™s plenty more where this came from. Move it, my pretties! Fanfictasia isnā€™t gonna build itself! Gotta go. Holy end screen voice-over, Batgirl! Batmanā€™s in trouble - we need to get out of this cell. You listen to Short Round, you live longer! OK, Iā€™m listening. You see? You are still alive! Hi Chewie! ARRRRR.
Info
Channel: ArtSpear Entertainment
Views: 28,890,365
Rating: 4.9249783 out of 5
Keywords: Super-Showdown-Bowl, SuperShowdownBowl, SuperShowdown, Super-Villain-Bowl, SuperVillainBowl, Super-Hero-Bowl, SuperHeroBowl, Super-Villain-Bowl sequel, SuperVillainBowl sequel, Super-Hero-Bowl sequel, SuperHeroBowl sequel, Oscar, arena, battle royale, Avengers, Marvel, DC, Star Wars, Deadpool, Harley Quinn, X-Men, Lord of the Rings, Back to the Future
Id: S6yLGIqyBM8
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 38min 27sec (2307 seconds)
Published: Mon Dec 23 2019
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