"Skills for Positive Communication in Marriage" - Jimmy Evans

[Applause] marriage today presents skills for positive communication in marriage by Jimmy Evans communication is obviously one of the most essential areas of the marriage relationship it is the primary way that we know each other you know you really never know a person without the exchange of words when you got to know each other many people today you know on the Internet are spending a lot of time building relationships on the Internet through words they they really believe that simply through typing words to each other that they really are building a meaningful relationship we know that it has to be a personal face-to-face relationship at some point but the point is you're not going to get to know a person without exchanging a lot of words it's how we know each other it's how we share what our needs are it's also how we resolve conflict and so if you can't communicate you can't do any of those things you can't share your needs you really can't get to know another person you certainly can't resolve conflict and so in this message I'm going to talk about two major areas we're going to talk a little bit later about five standards five things that we set in our communication in our marriage to make sure that our communication is effective the second thing I'm going to talk about actually the first thing to talk about is avoiding some of the common problems one of the most common problems that people have in communicating is not understanding the power of words now this is proverbs 18 verse 20 and 21 a man's stomach shall be satisfied from the fruit of his mouth from the produce of his lips he shall be filled death and life are in the power of the tongue and those who love it will eat its fruit the words contain nuclear power in the spirit realm the Bible says in the beginning was the word and the Word was with God and the Word was God in everything that has come into being has come into being through the Word of God and you understand in Genesis 1 it says God spoke and said let there be light you understand also that God made us in His image that we we have the ability to create or destroy through our words we live in a society of smart alecks we live in a society of sarcasm in crudeness and vulgarity and things like that and many people believe that you can speak words but those words really don't matter and those words really aren't doing anything I understand every good marriage is made from good words in a lot of them I've never seen an exception every good marriage there are a good number of words being spoken of a positive nature and any bad marriage there are either no words there's not communication or there's negative communication in that marriage what this says is and by the way the verse after this says he who finds a good wife finds a good thing he who finds a wife finds a good thing death in life or in the power by mouth want you to understand words are nuclear and every word you say in your marriage has a consequence to it and if you're gonna have a good marriage you have to learn to appreciate this is says the those who love their words will eat the fruit of it I was verbally abusive I didn't know how to deal with my emotions I didn't know how to deal with Karen and all the differences we had and whenever I got angry I would become us pretty nice otherwise but I would become verbally abusive and not only I mean I would I would put her down and I would say things to her it in a very harsh manner Karen wilted in my presence our our marriage was terrible and I've told you in another session that when I got to the point of repenting for what I had done because I mean when when I died when you know that selfish nature and me finally died one of the first things I became aware of was how abusive I was now before that night honestly I thought I was a great guy and I thought I was a wonderful husband but on the night that that I died and God finally got to my heart is I began to understand how abusive I had really been and when I repented to Karen the first thing she said to me when I said I'm sorry I'm sorry for how I treated you the first thing she said is it's your mouth what you have said to me Jimmy has hurt me worse than anything else I heard a story by Jonathan winters some of you remember the comedian Jonathan and you know he had this insane type of humor that was really really funny and but he was severely abused as a child and in in every way verbally and physically by his father and I think this was on 60 minutes where they were sharing this story about him and you know they were going behind the the humor into the the brokenness of him and he said My father physically abused me and verbally abused me and he said the physical beatings were nothing compared to what he said to me and there's nothing he had been in psychiatric pavilions and all kinds of mental care throughout his adult life and he said the verbal abuse that I went through was far worse than any physical abuse that I went through because the things he said to me are still ringing inside of me what a person said to us twenty or thirty years ago can still be hurting us right now words are not only nuclear but they last there they last and so let me let me talk about some of these issues related to common deceptions that people have about communication and the first is this words are evaporative a lot of people believe that I speak words and these words just evaporate into the air now this is this is Jesus in Matthew chapter 12 Jesus said I say to you that for every idle word men may speak they will give account of it in the day of judgment for by your words you will be justified and by your words you will be condemned he said for every idle word that we speak in public or in private now here's what I want us to understand even though in our society we look at words as being inconsequential and evaporative I say a word and it just evaporates up in the air every word we say is being recorded in heaven and if it isn't how could God hold us accountable for even every idle word that we've spoken and beside the idle words the things that we've said to hurt people the things that we've said that are wrong they're they're racist they're sexist they're mean they're hateful they're they're crude they're they're vulgar or whatever Jesus said when you get to heaven one day by your words you will be justified or by your words you will be condemned in all of us as believers who believe in God need to take a step back from our culture and say many people in our culture who are throwing around very very violent vulgar words you don't want to be standing next to them on the day of judgment because even though today it seems like they're smart and slick and they're getting all this money for entertainment or whatever they're doing with those words or it seems like they're getting ahead on the day of judgment God will go back into every single word they've spoken and they'll be judged by those words and so the Bible tells us that words are nuclear and not only do words not evaporate words stick in heaven and stick in people's hearts and sometimes I've said something to someone or I've said something to Karen just in passing that I didn't think was very important in five or ten years later someone will say to me you know you said this to me one time and it really hurt me and to me it was just something you know an inconsequential or a person will come up to me and say you know five years ago you encouraged me and you'll never know how much it meant to me words stick they stick in heaven they stick down here let me let me tell you the good news and that is God is recording every word in heaven and the good news is there is an eraser on the recorder that's good news isn't it when we take responsibility for our mouths and understand the seriousness of this issue and we say God I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that I ask you to forgive me the good news is he erases those words and we'll never have to be held to account for it we need to be thankful for that but we also need to ask say we're sorry to our spouse when I went to Karen and I finally said I was sorry because I was verbally abusive for years before I ever said I was sorry the instant that I began to take responsibility for my words our marriage changed words don't evaporate they stick and they're very very powerful another deception that people get into related to words his words are non revealing a person will say well that's just not my heart why I didn't mean that that's not my heart okay this is what Jesus said either make the tree good and it's fruit good or either make the tree bad and it's true that for a tree is known by its fruit brood of vipers how can you being evil speak good things for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks a good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things and an evil man out of the evil treasure his heart brings forth evil things so let me tell you what I'm saying this is telling you about you when you when you're talking and you're mean it means there's anger down there when you're sarcastic sarcasm is anger it's a form of anger when you're tearing someone down when you're negative and someone says you know every time you talk you're mean you're negative thing to say so I don't mean it but yes you do you mean it that's you that's you you're negative there's there's darkness down in your heart because out of the abundance of your heart your mouth is speaking and let me say this another way a lot of us when we go back into our past with me I had a lot of pain in my past that I had never dealt with okay and so since I had never dealt with that pain in my past it was coming out on Karen and I was mean then I was angry and I was a nice guy if you stayed over here and you were nice to me if you didn't threaten me I was really nice but when you got up into my space and you threatened my hurts I would become violent with my mouth there's nothing I would not say to protect myself with my mouth and I didn't know why was that white but the reason I was that way is because all these hurts that I had inside of my heart and here's the point when you're hurt you sound like you're hurt you're mean you're defensive you you won't take you hold everybody away you're sarcastic you're you're negative whatever and what what it's showing you is it's not showing you that you're necessarily a bad person is showing you that you're a wounded person there's something not right down in here if I'm unhealthy if I'm if I'm vulgar if I'm hateful whatever it is when it comes out rather than saying That's not me that's something I didn't mean anything by that don't tell yourself like it's alive what you need to say is why am I saying that where does that come from and that's the time you sit down with the Lord because the Holy Spirit he knows everything and he's that he's our guide jesus said he'll lead you into all truth that's the time that you need to sit down with the Holy Spirit in prayer and say Holy Spirit why do I talk like this why am I so sarcastic why am I so mean why do i why do I give people the silent treatment and why can't I be positive you know there are times that you you see some people they can't say a positive word they just can't be positive they just can't be encouraging and you say why am I like that there's something wrong and rather than blaming it on somebody else they're saying that's not really me it really is you that's what Jesus said out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks and so words are revealing this is my point there here's another issue related to words some people think words are powerless and I've said before to people and counseling to men and women why don't you go to your spouse and just say I love you encourage them apologize to them and here's what people will say to me it wouldn't matter it wouldn't anything these are nuclear there's no such thing as a word not doing good prayer helps prays helps encouragement helps when you go to your spouse and you love them and you encourage them and you you speak the truth to them and you use this mouth in a positive way there's not one chance in a million that's not going to do any good words are powerful don't tell yourself that lie that yeah I would I would I would encourage him and say something good but it wasn't doing good and here's the last deception that people get into bad words can bring good results this is what I believe in other words I'm gonna customize my cousin my spouse just needs a good cussing out and I I can get mad and throw a little fit just say all kinds of bad things I tell you my experience has been you know in counseling over the years some of the sweetest Christian people I've ever met just get so mean when they fight in marriage and they'll diffuse the worst language you know and they'll sit in counseling and just sweet little couple and he'll say yeah she got mad at me the other day and she used all these words the worst cuss words you can think of I look at her and she'll say well and little Suzy homemaker over here you know got a mouth on her then so and what happens is when all this anger builds up and you get mad and you spew and I used to do that I mean when I get mad at Karen I would just you know let her have it with my mouth I've never in all the years of counseling here's what I've never seen I've never seen this one time I've never seen a person come into my office and say you know I've really been a rat in our marriage I've really been terrible and you know something the other night my spouse customi out and it helps so much I just saw it right in the middle of all the vulgarity in the and the hateful things it's like a light came on and and I could just see man and my bad person I really need to change words our seats those who love it will eat its fruit words are seeds you can't get bad good fruit from bad seed do not be deceived God is not mocked for whatever a man shows that will he also reap he who sews to his flesh full from the flesh reap corruption he who sews to the Spirit will from the spirit reap everlasting life when you sow good words you get good fruit when you sow bad words you get bad fruit you can't produce a good result with a bad word so sarcasm and meanness and hatefulness and profanity those will always damage your marriage and you have to get to the place in other words but before we can properly communicate we just have to sit down and give ourselves this little pep talk and just say hey this thing is powerful this is powerful and with this I can build a great life God has given me the power of life and death just like he has the power to create the power to bring light the power to encourage the power to love the power to feed another person's spirit the power to tell the truth and bring enlightenment and understanding God has given this to bring life and light into my life and other people's life but it also has the power to destroy you've got a powerful weapon laying right between your jaws and you've got to wake up and say this thing can build or destroy I love this and I want to eat the fruit of a good mouth and this is going to be a seed sower in my life that when I go through my day I'm just gonna be and just plant good seats wherever I go plant good season my children and my wife and I'm a husband then in my friends and wherever I go I'm speaking good words and loving words and truthful words and words that are are inconsistent with what I know is the nature of God and what happens is you just go all day long and you use your mouth to plant those seeds and you look back and you see a harvest of righteousness in your life in a happy marriage and a happy family and good friendships and God blessing you in every way but if you go and you plant bad seeds with your mouth and you look back at broken relationships and misunderstandings and difficulty and all those things understand you're reaping the fruit now of your mouth because the power of life and death is in your tongue let me tell you some other good news because we've all made mistakes but let's just say that you came out of a home where there was a lot of negativity verbal abuse or whatever and you learn to speak that way and you've done that let me tell you the good news and you look back and you say there has been devastation in my life and in my family's life because of all of the hatefulness and sarcasm and hurt that people have have spoken over me and spoken over my family and now I find myself doing that the same thing when you look back at that I want to only give you some good news you look back at that and here's what you say god I forgive my mom and dad I forgive everybody in my past that has hurt me with their mouth and all this pain inside of me that has been produced by these words that have been spoken to me I forgive everyone who has done that to me and I pray that you'd forgive me for everything I've done in return and lord I pray by the blood of Jesus that you'll kill that crop in my past everything everything I've said everything anyone has said to me I you'd kill that crop he does and you don't have to relive the rest of your life eating from that bad crop but then you stand right here at this moment in time and say from this point forward this will be different I'm going to use my mouth the way you created by mouth to be used not understanding the power of words in the consequences of words is one of the main reasons that we become either lazy or we become hurtful with our mouths we've got to take responsibility for our mouths here's the second misunderstanding or the second problem that a lot of people have in in marriage and communication it's not understanding the difference between men and women now I've already talked about how important communication is to a woman and so that that just goes without saying there men are emotionally modest and women are emotionally immodest we're opposite in these ways men are basically physically immodest we're not nearly as modest as women are physically women are physically very modest when women are going to have sex or anything like that they want privacy door shut locked kids and neste ties you know all that stuff it's they they want tremendo they're just very very private about their bodies men men are a must but women women are very emotionally immodest women will talk about anything in public when you oh you know and I've eavesdropped on tables of women at restaurants talking you know in it's not hard because they talk loud and they but if you are set next to a table full of women they it's just embarrassing what they talk about well they talk about everybody you know you hear about Phyllis you know they hear about Phyllis and Bob Wilson blah blah blah blah blah they stalk about all the relationships and and when you and and they talk about their feelings and they talk about it always comes around to dirty diapers at some point in the conversation you know is but when you have a table full of men talking we talk about trucks and sports and it never gets inside of here you just don't hear a table full of men saying Bobby are you hurting you know are you you look to me like you're hurt yeah yeah we don't care and we know and if we are we just want to talk about it you know because we know we have to go home and talk to our wives about it so the mint but here so here's my point when women are going to enjoy sex is because they have a very very protected atmosphere to open up this is the way men are when they talk we can't talk in an unsafe environment because we're very very emotionally modest when Kerri and I we got I got saved when we got married and we started going to church and when we started going to church I was just mortified I didn't know how to be around Christians I didn't know how to act around Christians and so we went to this particular Sunday School class and I was trying to act like you know we had it all together which we didn't and so we we went into the same school class and they were asking people to share you know share about whatever well I wouldn't share anything that's meaningful so Karen we just got to know these people and she said we're overdrawn in our checkbook and we're we're struggling financially and would you pray for us I want strike her mouth god what what do you mean were and we were overdrawn and we were struggling but I didn't want anybody to know it and we got out of there and I said so we change churches I hated that and anytime you're with a woman and you're talking you're just nervous the whole time of what they might say like your children you know they just say say anything so and you say I really wish my husband would talk to me okay well here's here's a couple of things he has to have the same atmosphere to talk that you do to have sex okay now let me see me say this and this is this is kind of crude but let me say anyway if you if your husband took pictures to work the next day of your intimate times together and showed them to your friends you would be mortified okay if you ever share a word he says to you in private he feels the same way he's very emotionally modest and if you got undressed in front of your husband he went steamy oh yeah it's you would just like never show you anything again there Buster is you would be mortified that's what happens when he opens his heart in you criticizing see men men are very emotionally modest and and so women are tough women are tough people did you know research has proven that women can argue women can argue hard and get into very difficult conversations and your blood pressure doesn't even go up I mean women are tough and they can get into just you know real difficult conversations that just mortify men you know and and we're like is it a complaint counter you know when I go to a store I go to complained counter I'm kind of apologetic you know and ESCO like you know this thing really didn't work maybe I don't think it was my fault but you know could I get another one or something like that women walk in and say it's no good give me my money back I can't handle that I don't want that so but for women it's no big deal they did they can handle it so women women can just Duke it out emotionally and get into real intense relationships when a man's blood pressure goes above a hundred we get disoriented and we can't think this is true and they've proven this in research is that they wire men up and women up when we're fighting and men get into a conflict and what our blood pressure goes up we get disoriented and we just don't even know what's going on and why I'm saying like a man here okay so you he's just not as tough as you are mostly it's just the truth is even though we're physically different emotionally we're not we're not as strong and that's why it's so important for a woman when it the Bible says to honor your husband you just need to understand it he can't he just can't eat as much emotionally at a time as you can you ladies are tough you're emotionally tough but for us to talk you just saw is almost have to treat us like we're just you know we're little kids Bob can I talk to you you know can I say something would be okay if I say something now you know and real protected atmosphere and when we talk you can't make fun of it now you you can say something about it but you can't criticize it you can't laugh at it because if you judge it we are ours back up because we're real real modest emotionally and if you leave and tell your friends about it and we are with our friends on the golf course and they say Harold you know Margaret told me that she was talking to Sarah the other day I heard that you're afraid of ducks you get a drink you really believe this way and the only person you told was your wife in a weak moment in the bedroom talking you say and she went and told everybody and now she's in a counselor saying I don't know why he won't talk he's just a quiet man well if he's gonna talk you have to understand he's wired different than you are very very tender very very modest and so the more intimate the conversation the more we have to know you're going to be careful with what we say and you're not going to share it anywhere else okay let me talk about five standards for successful communication in marriage if those are problems not understanding the power of words not understand the difference in the opposite sex related to how we communicate by the way we also hear through our needs one of the differences between men and women is women need to hear security and everything that said and went men need to hear honor and everything that says it is how you encrypt successful communication women can never be talked to successfully unless everything we say to them they hear security that's their language and you'll never be able to talk to a man successfully unless everything you're saying to him is encrypted with honor and respect so let me talk about five standards for successful communication number one is caring if the most powerful aspect of communication is the issue of caring if you don't care it shows in everything that you do that if I'm going to successfully communicate with my spouse it means in my body language and my countenance and eye contact and in my response and in the tone of my voice everything that I do communicates caring to you when Karen and I got when we started dating I cared and we would sit and talk and I remember we would sit in pocket restaurants or we would talk on the phone remember when you first start dating you know you talk on the phone and like you talk on the phone for hours at a time you hear each other breathe you know and you're just sitting there not saying a lot you can hear each other breathe like that is so romantic because you know you just you just really care you're working or hard at it well and when you first start communicating you know Karen would say can I say something to you and I would say yeah yeah and then flash-forward five or six years in the marriage and they say can I say something in say excuse me excuse me just a minute and I'm doing something else I'm watching TV or something and they're trying to communicate and I'm not looking at them and in my responses there's a tone of my voice that communicates and says I don't care if it's impossible to communicate with a person who doesn't care have you ever been in a restaurant in the waiter or waitress that was assigned to you really did not want to take care of you it that a frustrating experience and and you spend you know the the evening or the meal going excuse me excuse me and they're walking by the table and you're going I know they heard me you know and they just don't that's what it's like to be married to a person who doesn't care I'm trying to say something but it's impossible because you really don't care you don't care how I feel you don't care what I'm talking about and here's what it means to care it means someone's talking and you're looking at them you have to make eye contact and that's why there are times that's so important turn the TV off put the newspaper the magazine the computer down turn it off and when you're talking there are some times that are just casual communication times that that don't matter as much but Karen is real good about this but currently sit down and say I need to talk then when she says I need to talk and she's communicating that way that's my time to do take whatever I have and turn to her and say what and when I do that she knows I care when I will not make eye contact when I'm when I'm frustrated with my body language I'm communicating with my body language whatever they don't care it's impossible to communicate so understand that your nonverbal signals are sending a message to your spouse of whether you care and if you don't care it communicates rejection make some it makes communication impossible number two standard for successful communication is praise negativity is the devil's language and it will destroy your marriage it lets try your life negativity God is a God of praise Psalm 100 says we enter God's gates with Thanksgiving and we enter into his courts with praise God never lets a negative person into his intimate presence when it says we enter into God's gates with Thanksgiving into his courts with praise courts means intimate presence we are created in the image of God I will never ever let anybody into my heart unless they're positive about me never when a marriage becomes negative we close our hearts to each other it's the most intuitive thing that we do in a self preservation mode and that's why the devil loves to come and accuse us to each other and make our language negative by the way when they measure the the predictors of divorce and they can measure this with accuracy of who will divorce the number one predictor of divorce is criticism is a negative attitude and it's not just complaining and saying well honey that hurt my feelings and I don't like that because complaining is important criticism is a negative tone that sets up in the relationship as a filter that everything is seen through I just I don't I don't trust you I don't like you nothing's good everything is bad and we stop praising each other we enter into God's gates with Thanksgiving and enter into his courts with praise we're exactly the same the same way and we have to set a discipline in our lives of praising each other now every good marriage has a positive tone praise is a discipline no I want you once you listen to it so you say well our marriage is terrible and you know we just i things are bad and you know things have gotten really negative whatever you can change that through praise you know the the reason that you fell in love is because you complimented each other you never fall in love with someone saying I just hate your hair you need to lose some weight you really do you know you're looking a little pudgy you never I mean oh could we go out again because I've got some other things I'd like you to critique about my life you know is that but that's how you fall out of love praise is a discipline in our lives that keeps the the measure of our marriage very high as high as you want your marriage to go your mouth has to go there first and if you want to have a passionate marriage it doesn't mean that you trade your spouse in and go out and find your soul mate so that you have this perfect person that you always praise because I'm just telling you right now your perfect soul mate is severely messed up they have problems there's no fairytale person out there that doesn't have problems any person that you would ever marry as soon as you're married to them you begin to see things about them that you don't like and the issue the real challenge is this to keep focusing on the things that you like deal with the things that you don't like in a positive way but keep focusing on the things that you like and let your mouth be a mouth of praise number three standard for successful communication is truth you have to tell the truth you have to have a truth amount and I'm not talking about a brutal amount I'm talking about a truthful mouth proverbs 3 3 says bind mercy and truth around your neck and write them on the tablet of your heart every word that comes out of my mouth is going to be truthful the Ephesians 4:15 says speaking the truth in love we grow up into all aspects into him is everything that I say is going to have truth in it I'm not gonna lie about it let me let me say this if you don't tell the truth it's going to come out in other behavior if something's really bothering you and if something's going on in your life you need to be truthful about it because if you're not it goes into passive-aggressive behavior you know when you put that skunk in the basement it's gonna stink up the whole house and so don't trap things down inside of you and someone says is something wrong and you say no nothing's wrong you need to get it out and you need to be honest if there's something going on in your life that that's significant you need to talk it out and be honest about it number four standard for successful communication is faith and I said this to the to the ladies in the other session that we did related to them and that is you say anything you need to say to your husband because you're his equal but once you've said it then you have to let God be the enforcer you have to have faith that God is a God of truth and if you've spoken the truth that he is your partner to enforce it in your husband's heart without faith you're going to nag him you're going to browbeat him until you get your way because you're the enforcer you don't have faith in God first Peter 3 says that a gentle and quiet spirit is precious in the sight of God a gentle and quiet spirit is not the mark of a mousy beaten down woman a gentle and quiet spirit is the mark of a woman of faith who believes that she can speak what she needs to speak and God will enforce it in her husband's heart it's gentle and by the way the opposite of gentle and quietness is rough and loud let me tell you my story Karen I had a I had I was verbally abusive for years in our marriage and I stopped doing that but I was still very forceful and when when I got angry or upset or insecure or something like that I was forceful with Karen and Karen said to me one time she said Jimmy I wish I wish that I could just record you when when we're arguing something I wish you could hear the way you talk to me and I would always say to her I don't talk to you that way Karen I there's nothing wrong with why I'm talking and I was so intense but I couldn't I couldn't hear it in my own voice and she kept saying you're just too intense you're you're just too rough with me and so I was praying one morning in the Lord healed me the Lord healed me in a moment of time with this I I was sitting there in just praying about this issue and the Lord showed when it says in Ephesians 5 that Jesus washes his bride in the washing of water with the word I saw myself as the bride of Jesus and I was filthy and the Lord was taking his hands in a little bowl of water and cupping his hands in it and putting it over my head and just letting it drop on top of my head and the water no force at all the water of his word was just washing me but what I knew in a moment of time was he was willing to take an entire lifetime to clean me up you know when you got saved can I tell you something God did not think you were a short project when we get saved God knows it'll take a lifetime to clean us up but aren't you thankful he's a patient God he said come to me I'm gentle and I'm humble and you'll find rest for you in other words he's not a severe god when I saw the Lord doing that to me I realized for 35 years now he's been cleaning me up and he's still cleaning me up the next thing I saw was Karen in a wedding dress and I had a fire hose hosing her down and she was just blown away by the force of the fire hose that was just you know I was just spraying her down with because here's what I thought I want the reason for my intensity is I want to finally get you fixed I'm tired of this I'm tired this issue and and I just need to get you fixed so I was intense like that and I would just use such force and intensity but and I would say do you understand what I'm saying do you understand what I'm saying she said yeah I understand this I don't think you understand because I was trying to clean her up so when I saw that picture it fixed me just like that it healed me and the next time I was bothered about something that Karen did what she was in the kitchen and I walked through the kitchen and I said Karen can I say something to you and she said yeah and I said well this happened and I just need to tell you how I felt about it and she said all right I said why felt this in this news I said okay that's all and I just know intensity like I would normally do and I just turned I walked out that's the first time I've ever done that the next time Karen walked by me she said I really like what you just did in there and I said well I did too it's easier to do it that way it's so hard to live your life trying to fix people with your mouth all the time you have to speak the truth and leave it with God and say god you're the god of truth and I have faith that you can take what I just said if it's true and you can change my spouse from the inside it changed our marriage when I stopped trying to fix Karen all the time with my words but I left it with God number five standard is surrender this mouth belongs to God I surrender my mouth to God and I want God to use my mouth to build my marriage to build my children in to live a life that will glorify Him this is not my mouth this is God's mouth and I'm gonna give an account for this mouth one day to God and I'm not going to in any way justify meanness or evil or anything else with this mouth though everybody else may do it this mouth belongs to God and I believe that if we will live our live who our lives by those standards it will help us to communicate

Channel: ThePastorrev

Views: 270,389

Rating: 4.8655267 out of 5

Keywords: Jimmy Evans, Marriage, Communication

Id: eq12RjNqr1Q

Length: 39min 51sec (2391 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 01 2018