male narrator: THERE'S
A WHOLE NEW BREED OF GAMBLER... - STARTING TO PISS ME OFF.
- SADDLE UP! narrator:
WHO RISK EVERYTHING TO HAUL THE MOST UNUSUAL ITEMS. - WAH! - THIS THING
IS JUST AN ABSOLUTE BEAST. narrator: ONE WRONG MOVE,
AND THEY COULD LOSE IT ALL. BUT IF THE BID IS RIGHT...
- I'M GOING 1,000. - UGH!
- BOO-YAH! narrator:
THE REWARDS CAN BE HUGE. - MORE MONEY, MORE MONEY,
MORE MONEY. - [laughs] narrator: ON THIS EPISODE
OF<i> SHIPPING WARS...</i> - OH, IT'S HUGE. - THIS IS MY DREAM.
- OPEN UP. - THIS ISN'T GONNA BE GOOD. - THESE KIDS DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHO BOZO THE CLOWN IS. - WHO SHIPS A WEDDING CAKE? - AN IDIOT COULD DO THIS RUN.
- I'M GETTING NERVOUS. - SCREW UP THAT CAKE, AND YOU'RE
GONNA BE MEETING BRIDEZILLA. - [gasping]
- NO, THIS IS NOT GOOD. THIS IS NOT GOOD. - NO MATTER WHAT, AT ALL COSTS,
I WILL GET THESE LOADS. NICKEL'S HOLDING UP A DOLLAR.
LET'S GO. - I DON'T GET INTIMIDATED, BECAUSE I WAS RAISED
TO BE TOUGH. [camel grunts]
AH! - I'M VERY MUCH
AN AMATEUR AT THIS. I'M DEFINITELY HAVING
AN "OH, [bleep]" MOMENT HERE. - YEE-HA! EVERY TIME
I WIN A BID, MAN, IT'S JUST LIKE
I JUST HIT THE JACKPOT. - IT'S ABOUT MAKING MONEY. WE'RE LOGISTICS SPECIALISTS. JUST ANOTHER DAY AT THE OFFICE. OH, YEAH. - HAVEN'T SWUNG A GOLF CLUB
IN A COUPLE MONTHS. I'M ACTUALLY
REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO RELIEVING SOME STRESS. BEING ON THE PGA TOUR
IS A DREAM. ANY CHANCE I GET,
I GOT TO BE PRACTICING. [thunder booming] WHY DOES MY LIFE SUCK? THE ONE DAY
I GET A LITTLE BIT OF TIME TO RELAX ON THE ROAD,
AND THIS IS WHAT I GET. narrator: EVERY DAY,
TRANSPORTERS ACROSS THE COUNTRY LOG ON TO USHIP
TO BID ON THEIR NEXT BIG HAUL. FIRST ITEM UP FOR BID: A 1954 GREYHOUND SCENIC CRUISER. - HOLY CRAP, MAN.
WHAT IS THIS? - IT WAS THE DREAM OF LUXURY
ON THE ROAD. GREYHOUND COMMISSIONED
GM TRUCK COMPANY TO BUILD THESE BUSES. - LOOKS LIKE A PREGNANT BUS.
- IT'S HUGE. - IT'S ONE OF THOSE DEALS
WHERE I WOULD TAKE IT TO MECHANIC SHOPS
AND THEY JUST DECIDE THE PROJECT IS JUST TOO EXTENSIVE. HOPEFULLY I'M SELLING
TO SOMEBODY WHO CAN GET BEYOND THE HURDLE
THAT I'VE HAD WITH IT. - IT'S A SCENIC CRUISER. I MEAN, THERE'S VERY FEW OF THEM
LEFT IN THE WORLD. THIS IS AN OPPORTUNITY
TO HAVE SOMETHING THAT I CAN TRAVEL IN
WITH THE FAMILY. I'VE BEEN WAITING AND WAITING
AND WAITING AND WAITING AND WONDERING IF ANYBODY
WAS EVER GONNA BE ABLE TO MOVE THIS BUS. narrator: OPERATING
WITH NO ENGINE, THIS OVERSIZED BUS
MUST BE HAULED 970 MILES FROM LAMAR, COLORADO,
TO GREAT FALLS, MONTANA. - WHERE THE MEN ARE MEN,
THE SHEEP ARE NERVOUS, AND THE BABIES
WALK AROUND SAYING, "DAAADDY." I'LL START IT OUT. - HAS NO ENGINE
AND TRANSMISSION. IT'S GOT TO BE WORTH IT, 'CAUSE IT'S NOT GONNA BE
AN EASY PICKUP. - I'D HAVE TO
RENT A TRAILER, HIRE SOMEBODY TO HELP LOAD THIS,
BUT THAT HASN'T STOPPED ME YET. - SHE'S USUALLY CARRYING
SIX GUINEA PIGS. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. - I WOULD HAVE TO RENT
EVERYTHING TO DO THIS. BUT I'VE GOT TO EARN MY WINGS
SOMETIME. - HE HAS NO POSSIBLE WAY
TO DO THIS. - MAYBE HE JUST WANTS
TO FEEL INCLUDED. - IT WILL BE OVERSIZED. YOU NEED AN EXTENDABLE LOWBOY.
HELLO. THAT'S WHY I BOUGHT
THAT TRAILER. - WHO DO YOU THINK
THEY'D RATHER DO IT: AN OLD GUY OR ME? - WELL, THEY'D RATHER HAVE
SOMEBODY THAT'S CAPABLE OF DOING IT. - IT'S GONNA BE A LONG DAY
OF LOADING THIS THING, BUT THERE'S MONEY TO BE MADE. - YOU KNOW, THIS SEEMS LIKE
IT'S MORE WORK THAN IT'S WORTH. I'M OUT. - WELCOME BACK TO REALITY, JEN. - 30,000 POUNDS
GOING THROUGH THE ROCKIES? OH, HELL NO. - I CAN STILL MAKE
SOME GOOD MONEY. I'M GONNA GET THIS LOAD.
[laughs] - I'M GONNA DROP IT TO 3,700. - SILVER [bleep] JUST CAME DOWN
ANOTHER $50. IT'S WAY TOO MUCH WORK.
WE'RE OUT. I LOVE WATCHING SENIOR CITIZENS
DUKE IT OUT. - WELL,<i> JERSEY SHORE'S</i> OUT. SO NOW IT'S JUST BETWEEN ME
AND MARC. - IT'S THE PERFECT LOAD
FOR MY TRAILER. AH. YEAH. - WELL, MARC,
THAT WAS PRETTY SNEAKY. - I KNEW I'D GET THIS ONE. narrator:
SECOND ITEM UP FOR BID: A SIX-TIER WEDDING CAKE. - A WEDDING CAKE? - WHAT THE WHAT? - NAH, THAT'S ALL YOU. - WHO SHIPS A WEDDING CAKE? - ERIN AND PETE
ARE A WONDERFUL COUPLE, AND THEY'RE GOOD FRIENDS. THEY'VE BEEN THROUGH
SOME REALLY HARD TIMES. ERIN'S HOUSE BURNED DOWN
A COUPLE YEARS AGO, SO SHE LOST EVERYTHING. SHE DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY
FOR A WEDDING CAKE. - SOUTH CAROLINA
TO RHODE ISLAND. RHODE ISLAND
DON'T HAVE WEDDING CAKES? - CONTACTED A FRIEND OF OURS
TO PROVIDE THE WEDDING CAKE DOWN IN SOUTH CAROLINA. - I THINK IT'S PROBABLY ABOUT
1,000 MILES OVER THREE HOT DAYS. THAT'S A LONG WAY
FOR A CAKE TO GO. narrator: TRAVELING FROM BELTON,
SOUTH CAROLINA, TO NARRAGANSETT, RHODE ISLAND, THIS CAKE MUST BE SAFELY
TRANSPORTED WITHIN THREE DAYS-- IN TIME FOR THE WEDDING. - IT WOULD BE INTERESTING
TO TRY, YOU KNOW. MAYBE I COULD HAVE
A LITTLE PIECE OF IT. - SHE'S GONNA BREAK IT, SO... - ROY SHIPPING A WEDDING CAKE? - HERE'S YOUR DAMN CAKE.
TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT. - BELIEVE IT OR NOT,
I HAVE TRANSPORTED A FEW WEDDING CAKES IN MY DAY. - I MEAN,
IT IS CLOSE TO HOME, THOUGH. IT'D BE A PRETTY EASY ROUTE. - THROUGH NEW YORK CITY? - I DON'T SEE A PROBLEM. - I KNOW THIS SHIPMENT
AIN'T GONNA END WELL. IT'S GONNA END UP BEING
A 50-POUND PILE OF CAKE CRUMBS. - I'M SO HAPPY
FOR THE BRIDE AND GROOM. NO CAT HAIR.
NO KITTY LITTER IN IT. - THIS THING'S
ON A TIGHT DEADLINE. I DON'T NEED TO BE SCREWING UP
NOBODY'S WEDDING. - I'VE MADE CAKES.
I'VE MOVED CAKES. AN IDIOT COULD DO THIS RUN. - IF JEN WINS IT, ONE WILL. - GREAT. - YES! I DON'T HAVE TO DEAL
WITH THAT CAKE. - WHATEVER.
- SWEET. - JUST REALLY WONDERING WHAT
I BIT OFF HERE FOR THIS LOAD. THERE SHE IS. OH, MAN. THAT'S A BIG-[bleep] BUS. - JON?
- HEY, MARC, HOW ARE YOU? - GOOD BUDDY.
- NICE TO MEET YOU. - NICE MEETING YOU.
- AND THIS IS IT. SHE'S A BEAUTY, HUH?
- MONSTER. - IT'S A PRETTY NEAT MACHINE. ONLY MADE 1,000 OF THEM
TO BEGIN WITH. - EVER?
- YUP. THERE'S ONLY A COUPLE HUNDRED
LEFT. MAYBE ONLY 50 ON THE ROAD.
- REALLY? - IT'S RARE. - CHECK IT OUT.
THEY REALLY DID A NICE JOB. - YUP, THEY DID. - QUIET BACK THERE. PEOPLE SNORING AND FARTING. NOTHING LIKE A BUS RIDE. - FARTING? REMIND ME TO NEVER GO ON
A BUS RIDE WITH YOU, MARC. - SO WHAT KIND OF TRAILER
IS THIS? IS THIS 40 FEET? - IT'S AN EXTENDABLE DECK. WHEN I PULL THIS THING OUT,
I'M GONNA HAVE A 20-FOOT GAP-- - A 20-FOOT GAP IN THE TRAILER? - YEAH.
HERE, LET ME SHOW YOU. - THAT'S NOT A "GAP."
THAT'S A HUGE-[bleep] HOLE. - I'M GONNA CLOSE THE GAP
WITH STEEL OR MAYBE A OLD FLATBED
OFF A TRUCK OR SOMETHING. - AND DO YOU HAVE IT? - I DON'T HAVE IT.
I'M GONNA HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT. - GOOD PLAN, MARC. I'M SURE
THE LOCAL HARDWARE STORE SELLS BEAMS
THAT SUPPORT 30,000 POUNDS. NO BIG DEAL. - I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT PLAN.
- YOU DON'T? - HOW DO YOU PLAN ON GETTING
THE BUS ONTO THE TRAILER? - I'M GONNA GET BEHIND IT
WITH A FORKLIFT OR MY TRUCK, AND I'M GONNA PULL IT
RIGHT UP ON THERE. - THE SPACE-IN-BETWEEN-HERE PART
IS WHAT CONCERNS ME. I DON'T THINK YOU CAN DO IT. - THIS GUY'S RIDING ME? I WONDERED WHAT HE'D BE SAYING
IF JEN WAS STANDING HERE WITH HER HORSE TRAILER. WELL, I'M PRETTY SURE I CAN. I'M PRETTY SURE I CAN DO IT. - WELL, MARC, GOOD LUCK. - ALL RIGHT, BUDDY, TAKE CARE.
- THANK YOU. IT'S A UNIQUE PLAN.
I'M NOT SURE I SEE IT HAPPENING. - I GOT TO GET THIS BUS
ACROSS 14 FEET OF NO-MAN'S-LAND. THIS IS GONNA BE A BUGGER, MAN. - I'M IN SOUTH CAROLINA, AND I'M PICKING UP
THIS WEDDING CAKE. AND I DO LOVE CAKE. HI, I'M JENNIFER. - KEN.
- HEY. - NICE TO MEET YOU. DO YOU HAVE CAKE THAT I CAN TRY?
- OF COURSE. - OH, MY GOSH, LET'S DO THIS. - COME ON IN.
- OH, IT SMELLS SO GOOD IN HERE. MMM.
IT IS SO GOOD. IT'S GONNA GO STRAIGHT
TO MY BUTT. - MAYBE THEY SHOULD JUST PAY YOU
IN CAKE, JEN. - I WANT TO SEE THIS CAKE.
- OKAY. WE HAVE IT IN THE REFRIGERATOR. - [gasps] OH, IT'S BEAUTIFUL. - THEY HAVE WHITE CHOCOLATE
WITH RASPBERRY FILLING. - OH, MMM. - AND CHOCOLATE CHOCOLATE CHIP
WITH FUDGE. - OH, MY GOD.
I HOPE IT DOESN'T GET RUINED. - UM... I'M SURE YOU'LL GET IT THERE. - I HOPE SO.
OH, [bleep]. - GOT IT OKAY?
- MM-HMM. - THIS IS FONDANT,
SO I SHOULDN'T WORRY? I MEAN,
THIS IS A LITTLE STURDIER? - ACTUALLY, THIS IS BUTTERCREAM. - OH. IF "BUTTER" IS IN THE NAME, I'M A LITTLE WORRIED ABOUT IT
MELTING. - ALL RIGHT.
HOLD THAT THERE. - OKAY.
- GOT IT? SO WE'LL PUT THE CLEAR...
- OKAY. - SO YOU CAN CHECK. - NOW WHAT HOLLY'S GONNA DO-- SHE'S GONNA PUT A ROD RIGHT DOWN
TO THE MIDDLE OF THE CAKE. AND THAT CAKE
IS NOT GONNA GO ANYWHERE. - IT'S NOT GOING ANYWHERE.
- THROUGH ALL LAYERS. IT'S GONNA LOCK IT
RIGHT IN PLACE. - IT COULD FLIP OVER
AND IT'D BE FINE? I'M NOT SAYING
IT'S GONNA FLIP OVER. - OH, YEAH, YOU COULD JUST
RUN OVER IT; IT'D BE FINE. YOU COULD EAT IT; IT'D BE FINE. - ALL RIGHT. - AND THEIR WEDDING
IS SUNDAY AT 2:00. - OH, NO, IT WAS CHANGED
TO SATURDAY AT 2:00. - UH, NO, YOU DIDN'T. AT AT 2:00. WELL, IT'S SATURDAY AT 2:00.
I KNOW IT IS. - IT IS?
- IT IS. - OKAY. I WAS TOLD THE WEDDING
WAS ON SUNDAY. THIS ISN'T GONNA BE GOOD. - SO I'M ASSUMING THE CAKE'S
GONNA GO IN THE CAB. IS THAT RIGHT? - ACTUALLY, I WAS GONNA PUT IT
IN THE TRAILER. UNFORTUNATELY,
THIS HAS TO GO IN MY TRAILER, 'CAUSE IT WON'T FIT
IN MY BACK SEAT. - WE'VE NEVER HAD A CAKE
INSIDE A TRAILER BEFORE. - EVERYBODY KNOWS
THAT YOU DON'T SHIP A CAKE THAT'S BUTTERCREAM IN A TRAILER. - THEY'RE SKEPTICAL ABOUT HAVING
THIS CAKE TRAVEL THIS FAR, AND SO AM I. OKAY, I DON'T THINK
THAT'S GONNA MOVE. - 13 FOOT, 9 1/4. I GOT AN IDEA IN MY MIND.
I GOT A LITTLE PICTURE. THAT'S IT.
THAT'S THE MAP TO SUCCESS. GOT TO BUILD A BRIDGE. ONE WAY OR THE OTHER, THAT BUS IS GOING ON MY TRAILER
BY THE END OF THE DAY. THIS COULD BE A DOABLE PLACE. I'M MARC SPRINGER. I'VE HIRED ON TO MOVE THAT BUS. I'VE GOT A TRAILER
THAT I WANT TO PUT IT ON. BUT I'M GONNA NEED A LITTLE HELP
DOING IT. - WE CAN HELP YOU
GET IT ON THERE. - PERFECT. GOT ME A COUPLE OF FRAME RAILS. THEY'RE GONNA WORK PERFECT
FOR THESE BRIDGES. BACK OUT. THAT'S WHAT I CALL A BRIDGE. HOW TO LEVITATE A BUS. HOLD IT. YEAH, RIGHT THERE. OH, IT'S SAGGING. KEEP COMING. KEEP COMING. IT'S SAGGING PRETTY HARD
UP THERE. - I'M SURE
THAT BOWED STEEL BRIDGE IS REALLY GONNA HOLD UP
OVER THE COURSE OF THIS TRIP. - OUR MOTTO
IN THE TOWING BUSINESS: HOOK ON AND DON'T LOOK BACK. - [laughing] THANKS, GUYS. - IT'S STRESSFUL HAVING TO DRIVE FROM SOUTH CAROLINA
TO RHODE ISLAND IN TWO DAYS. I KNOW IT'S DOABLE. IT'S JUST, I HAVE ANOTHER
PICKUP AND DROP-OFF TO DO BEFORE I GET THERE. - YOU'VE GOT A WEDDING TO GO TO. WHY ARE YOU CLOWNING AROUND? - NICE TO MEET YOU.
- GOOD TO SEE YOU. YOU MADE IT.
- SO WHY ARE YOU SELLING IT? - YOU TRY TO RELIVE YOUR
CHILDHOOD THROUGH YOUR KIDS, AND UNFORTUNATELY... YOU CAN SEE HOW EXCITED HE IS. COME ON, LITTLE FELLA. - YOU DID IT. - YEAH. - ALL RIGHT, THIS IS AS GOOD
AS I KNOW HOW TO DO IT. THANKS, GUYS. - SEE YOU LATER, BOZO. - EVERY STATE
HAS A PORT OF ENTRY THAT YOU'VE GOT TO STOP AT
WHEN YOU'RE COMING IN. - THEY WANT ME TO PARK
THIS THING AND COME IN. - THE VIOLATION IS YOU
FAILED TO OBTAIN PERMIT OF PERMISSION TO
ENTER THE STATE WITH AN OVERSIZED LOAD. - THAT IS THE NUMBER
YOU SHOULD HAVE CALLED. - OKAY.
I DIDN'T KNOW I HAD TO. I'VE NEVER HAD AN OVERSIZED LOAD
GO THROUGH WYOMING. I WAS TOLD
BY A PERMITTING SERVICE THAT I COULD BUY
AN OVERSIZE PERMIT AT THE PORT OF ENTRY. THEY WERE WRONG. NOW I'M PAYING A FEE
BECAUSE THEY WERE WRONG. THEY'RE GONNA SCRUTINIZE ME NOW. THEY'RE GONNA MAKE SURE THAT THEY'RE DOING EVERYTHING
BY THE BOOK. BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE
THE PERMITS, THEY'RE OUT THERE
MEASURING EVERYTHING WITH A FINE-TOOTHED COMB. JUST THE FACT THAT
THEY'RE CRAWLING AROUND MY TRUCK WITH MEASURING TAPES IS NOT FUN. - THE GUYS AT THE CHICKEN COOP
WANT THIS MIRROR FOLDED IN? I'M JUST GONNA DO
WHAT THEY WANT ME TO DO. [straining]
IT'S FROZE UP. - IF THAT THING
CAN CARRY YOUR WHOLE WEIGHT, IT'S NOT BUDGING. - JUST GONNA TAKE IT OFF. REALLY? I HAVE TO DISMANTLE
THE [bleep] BUS TO GET THIS MIRROR MOVED? THIS FIVE-SECOND JOB'S TAKING ME
ABOUT A HALF HOUR. I WAS JUST ABOUT READY
TO TAKE A SLEDGEHAMMER TO IT. THAT'S THE DEAL. NOW I'M OUT OF HERE. [telephone ringing] - HELLO, THIS IS SCOTT. - SCOTT, HEY, THIS IS JENNIFER. I'VE GOT A COUPLE QUESTIONS. WHAT TIME'S THE WEDDING AT,
2:00? - NO, WE NEED THE CAKE
DELIVERED BY 1:00. - WHAT? OH, MY GOSH.
OKAY. I HAVE TO BOOK IT
TO RHODE ISLAND. I DON'T WANT TO RUIN
SOMEONE'S WEDDING. SHOULD I BACK IN? - BACK IT IN.
- OKAY. BUT I STILL HAVE TO DROP
THIS BOZO THE CLOWN GAME OFF. - JEN'S LAWN CARE. YOU GOT A LAWN,
WE'LL PUT TRACKS IN IT. - I FEEL SORRY
FOR THIS BRIDE AND GROOM. ALL BECAUSE YOU'RE
JUST CLOWNING AROUND. - ARE YOU BOZO THE CLOWN FANS?
- I AM. GROWING UP, IT WAS A SHOW
IN CHICAGO, AND THAT'S WHERE
WE BOTH GREW UP. PUT IN FOR TICKETS
WHEN I WAS FIVE YEARS OLD. THEY CAME WHEN I WAS
IN MARINE CORPS BOOT CAMP. - PEOPLE WANT A DISCOUNT
FROM ME WHEN I'M, LIKE,
FIVE MINUTES LATE. BUT 15 YEARS? I'D HAVE ASKED
FOR A PRETTY BIG DISCOUNT. - OKAY. - OKAY, HONEY, CAN YOU
LIFT IT UP REALLY QUICK? HURRY, HURRY, HURRY.
THERE WE GOT IT. - ARE YOU EXCITED?
- YEAH. - YES!
- GREAT JOB. - BYE, Y'ALL.
THANK YOU AGAIN. - I NOTICE THIS BUS
HAS MOVED A LITTLE BIT. THERE, SEE THIS HERE? THIS WAS THERE. A SHIPMENT THIS HEAVY
SHOULD NOT BE MOVING AN INCH. GONNA THROW ON AN EXTRA CHAIN
FOR SAFETY'S SAKE. - I HOPE THAT BUS
DOESN'T DO THE ELECTRIC SLIDE OFF YOUR TRAILER, MARC. - OH, HERE IT COMES. THERE SHE IS.
- HI, I'M JENNIFER. - I'M SCOTT.
- NICE TO MEET YOU. ALL RIGHT. - THERE IT IS.
- YES. WE'LL CARRY IT IN.
- OKAY. WE GOT TO KEEP IT OUT OF SIGHT. THERE'S A STEP RIGHT HERE. RIGHT THERE. YOU GOT IT?
- YEAH. RIGHT HERE?
- YUP. PERFECT.
- WHOO. [cheers and applause] - I'M GETTING NERVOUS. - ME TOO. [gasps]
- NO, THIS IS NOT GOOD. THIS IS NOT GOOD. I'M NOT HAPPY. [cheers and applause] - I PROMISE, LIKE,
I TIED IT DOWN. I SWEAR, LIKE, I-I--
DID ANYTHING. - WOW. - I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED
TO THE CAKE, BUT IT WAS IN MY TRAILER
FOR THREE DAYS WITH NO AIR CONDITIONING. - I'M NOT HAPPY. THIS IS SUCH A LETDOWN. - HOPE JEN DOESN'T ASK
FOR A BITE OF THE CAKE NOW. - WE NEED TO JUST SUCK IT UP
AND DEAL WITH IT. SHE NEEDS A WEDDING CAKE. - SO... - I NEED TO--
LET'S TAKE THE FRONT OFF. - HAPPIEST DAY
OF SOMEONE'S LIFE, AND JEN FINDS A WAY TO RUIN IT. - A LITTLE APPREHENSIVE
ABOUT THE DROP-OFF. IF IT COMES OFF THE RAMP, IT'S GONNA BE UGLY. - YOU MUST BE MARC. - I AM.
- NICE TO MEET YOU. - HEY, DID YOU HAVE ANY LUCK FINDING ANY KIND
OF EQUIPMENT OR ANYTHING? - YOU KNOW,
I MADE A COUPLE OF CALLS. I GOT THE GUY
THAT WAS AVAILABLE. - I JUST THINK IT'S GREAT
THAT YOU FOUND SOMEBODY TODAY. - YEAH. - OH, JEEZ. - AW, THAT WRECKER IS SO CUTE. - I DON'T KNOW
HOW THAT'S GONNA WORK. - LIKE, I FEEL HORRIBLE,
'CAUSE THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED. THIS ISN'T MY FAULT,
BUT I'M GONNA BE THE ONE THAT GETS BLAMED, 'CAUSE I'M
THE ONE THAT SHIPPED IT. - WHAT'S A WEDDING
WITHOUT A WEDDING CAKE? [cheers and applause] - I DON'T WANT
TO RUIN SOMEONE'S WEDDING. YOU KNOW, THE BRIDE DIDN'T KNOW
ANYTHING WAS WRONG WITH THE CAKE,
AND I'M GETTING PAID. THANK YOU SO MUCH.
- THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THANK YOU. - YOU READY?
- YEAH. - READY?
- YEAH. - HOLD ON.
LET ME HELP...DO NOTHING. - COMING BACK. REAL SLOW. SLOW. HOLD IT.
- HOLD UP. WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. [snapping] - [bleep]. HOLD ON A SECOND, TODD. YOU WANT ME
TO GRAB A HOLD OF THAT THING WITH THE FRONT OF MY TRACTOR
AND BACK IT OFF? - IF YOU WANT TO. - TIME TO DO WHAT I DO BEST:
TAKE OVER. - NOW. YES, GOOD. YES. - MR. PERFECT.
LOOK IT UP. - NO,
THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE OF US, AND THAT'S ME. - SO, STEVE,
LET'S JUST TAKE A FEW MINUTES, WALK AROUND,
AND SEE HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT IT. - ALL RIGHT. THIS IS NOT WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE
IN THE PICTURES. THE MIRROR'S MISSING. - THE SCALE WANTED ME
TO CLOSE IT IN. I HAD TO PULL THIS THING
OUT OF HERE, AND I COULDN'T BREAK IT FREE. - HOLY COW.
YUCK, UGLY. THAT WASN'T LIKE THAT
IN ANY OF THE PICTURES. - THAT WAS ALL CRACKED UP
JUST LIKE THIS STUFF WHEN I PICKED IT UP. I DON'T THINK
YOU WANT IT ON THERE ANYWAY. - THIS HATCH IS MISSING. - YEAH, THAT HATCH WAS NOT ON
WHEN I PICKED IT UP. - MISSING MIRROR, BROKEN HATCH,
AND BIG BROWN SPOT ON THE BACK? GREAT JOB. - I GUESS I PROBABLY
SHOULD HAVE MAYBE COMMUNICATED WITH YOU A LITTLE MORE
ON THE FRONT SIDE TO MAKE SURE THAT EVERYTHING
THAT WAS THERE WAS THERE. I KIND OF TRUSTED THE SELLER. - AH, THE MARC SPRINGER METHOD:
BLAME OTHER PEOPLE. - I'M STILL SO THRILLED
WITH THE BUS, I CAN'T COMPLAIN. THIS IS--
THIS IS JUST SO EXCITING. - YEAH.
- CAN I PAY YOU? - THAT'D BE GREAT.
- HERE IT IS. - WELL, I APPRECIATE IT. TAKE CARE, MY FRIEND.
- ALL RIGHT, THANKS. IT WAS A PLEASURE.
- I DID A GREAT JOB. ANYBODY'S GOT A BIG MOTOR HOME
OR A BUS, THEY KNOW WHO TO CALL NOW. narrator: MARC BROUGHT IN $3,650
FOR THE SCENIC CRUISER. AFTER LABOR AND MATERIALS,
PERMITS, PENALTIES, AND HIS EXPENSES, HE WAS LEFT WITH A PROFIT
OF $2,000 OVER SIX DAYS. JENNIFER'S RUN
WAS LESS SUCCESSFUL. SHE BROUGHT IN $700
FOR THE WEDDING CAKE, AND AFTER THE ADDITION
OF THE BOZO GAME AND THE COST OF HER EXPENSES, SHE WAS LEFT WITH A PROFIT
OF $675 FOR HER THREE-DAY RUN. - THINK I ATE TOO MANY CUPCAKES. BUT THEY'RE SO GOOD. "WHY DID JENNIFER GAIN
SO MUCH WEIGHT?" MMM. IT IS SO GOOD,
BUT MY TUMMY HURTS. - NOW THAT YOU'VE MOVED
THAT BUS, YOU NEED TO WEAR THAT. THAT'S THE PASSING OF THE HAT,
MY FRIEND. OH, YEAH, LOOK AT THAT. COME ON.
HE'S A NATURAL.
