r/Prorevenge My Professor Blackmailed Me For S**, So I Blackmailed The Dean

welcome to r slash pro revenge where op costs the company over 10 million dollars our next reddit post is from sniddle in 2013 my dad passed away while my brother and i were on vacation i was in spain and my brother was in canada and we had to get back to australia my travel insurance was dodgy but eventually they paid out after a few complaints which is pretty standard practice my brother tried to claim nine thousand dollars on his insurance he could only get one emergency seat on a bunch of connecting flights so between that the funeral and other cancellations it all added up surprising no one his claim was rejected back then there wasn't a regulating authority that dealt with travel insurance companies or if there was we had no idea what it was so my brother went through the usual hurdles involved with the appeals and complaint process eventually they told him that his claim for 9 326 was rejected and their determination was final so back then companies didn't really have twitter handles especially not insurance companies so my brother ever the troll created a twitter handle in this insurance company's name complete with their official logo he quickly set about gaining thousands of followers and legitimately began answering their questions with truthful albeit quite negative responses for example he would get a question like my daughter and i want to travel to paris what insurance coverage would you recommend my brother would say we recommend you take the premium for our comprehensive coverage and burn it we don't like to pay out on any insurance because it upsets our shareholders have fun in paris the insurance company got wind of this and sent him a cease and desist letter my brother counter offered with a contract for the company to purchase a twitter account for the very reasonable price of nine thousand three hundred and twenty six dollars they agreed our next reddit post is from iris zombie man two years ago i sold a motorcycle on craigslist the guy who bought it was in his early 20s and he didn't bring any riding gear with him he said that he left his writing gear at home and he saw my ad while he was at work i rode the bike down the street and back for him he said it sounded fine long story short i let him talk me down to a hundred bucks because he seemed like a nice kid i rode the bike to his sister's house form and had my wife follow to pick me up the next day my motorcycle is back on craigslist for five hundred dollars more than what i was originally asking and worst of all he was using my pictures i'm a professional photographer i've had my photos on magazine covers i was okay with a douchebag kid conning me and flipping the bike but not with using my pictures so i sent him a text telling him to take the ad down and post his own pictures he didn't so i posted my own craigslist ad that said something like free chickens and goats i'm old and tired i think it's time to quit i've got 600 hens and enough roosters to keep them laying also got about 40 milk goats i just want to make sure they go to a good home first come first served habla espanol and then i posted the kid's phone number i waited one day i called for my home phone at 9 30 at night hello he sounded tired estoy amando por la gallinas i said i'm calling about the chickens ain't no effing chickens f f f f no chickens butthole i waited half a second then said tienes cabras no effing goats he yelled then hung up the next day he texted me he told me that he changed the pics and could i please take down the ad for the chickens i thanked him for taking down my photos then i said chickens what the hell are you talking about fortunately because of all the posts we see on our slash choosing beggars we know exactly what type of people would have been calling him genius move op 10 out of 10 for revenge our next reddit post is from god mode deep a little background after disappointing my parents in high school with dismal academic scores and a serious predilection for teenage rebellion i ended up in a small town college with a close-knit christian community pursuing a degree in media studies it wasn't the best place that i could be but it was a fair compromise between my father's demand that i learned of paying skill and my own yearnings for liberation very quickly into this graduation program i realized that it was a waste and college was going to be a massive bore so i spend most of my time courting gullible women or smoking pot i'm the kind of straggler who puts in the bare minimum so as to not upset the balance of the universe and thus i made it to my final year without much of a fuss this is when two new characters entered my life the first was a new male professor an external faculty a scrawny slimy fellow i'll call him professor slimy he taught a major paper which was very well connected with the local church which had a lot to say in the college administration on sundays he moonlighted as a pastor for a small branch of the big church professor slimy also had a reputation of acting fresh with boys i laughed about it with my friends until one day professor slimy made a pass at me and not a verbal one i pushed him off me and told him that i'm not gay i reminded him that he's a teacher and asked him to get his act together now i am not homophobic but at that point young and freshly assaulted as i was i remember using profanities that would count as being homophobic or hurtful i really have nothing against gay people go pride but for those things that i said i am sorry professor slimy backed off and told me that he was sorry he had misread the signs i cooled off told him there were no signs apologize for the things i said and that was that or so i thought but more on that later the second entry was a new lecturer a chatty young woman let's call her rose she was fresh out of university had worked a few odd jobs and had landed this lecturing gig through some connection in the church she was from this town had studied in the college and knew the dean of the department well rose and i started off on the wrong foot due to a debate about art she put me down and i didn't mind i wasn't too interested either but just as spider i kept turning up essays rebutting her points and she kept marking me really harshly supplementing my dismal marks with juicy opinions on what she thought of my intellect it became a game between us now i would like to imagine that rose had a roving eye as she seemed to favor the young good-looking boys and really put down the girls in class except for one jess had been a classmate of ours and she was local so jess didn't live on campus and she kept a low profile she didn't shine but she wasn't disliked either suddenly after rose joined college jess started to shine in academics this happens often when a teacher is right for a student rose marked just extremely highly for a few assignments and this got a few nerds in the class really jittery because they saw jess as a new challenger for the crown of king of the nerds some of them had even read the assignments it just turned in and found them highly incoherent nothing explained the grades that she was getting this didn't bother me because grades and nerd drama was never my thing but then by a stroke of misfortune one of the other professors who taught us two other papers met with an accident and was out of action for almost two months attempt was hard to find and rose very gallantly volunteered to fill in for which surprisingly she was allowed to what this meant was that rose was now grading our assignments and papers for three separate subjects and suddenly jess's fortunes really turned she went from being a challenger to the crown to the nerd queen with her cumulative grades putting her on top of the pile jess just smiled through it all and made it out to be her hard work finally getting recognized a small coterie started to gather around her it still didn't bother me my universe was still in balance then one day one of our classmates saw rose and jess hanging out after college they were shopping in the same mall this classmate decided to lurk around and find out what was cooking imagine his surprise when he saw them walk out of the mall and take a taxi together imagine his greater surprise when he followed them to find them enter the same household picture the pure shock for the entire class when a day later we were all told that jess and rose are sisters effing blood sisters born of the same parents all of them living under the same roof somehow both of these sisters had conveniently forgotten to mention this now that they were in college they had pulled the sutter fuge for about four to five months now a bunch of nerds ganged up and approached the dean of our courses and brought her up to date on the scenario it turns out the dean knew all along about them being siblings and had actually encouraged rose and jess not to talk about it so as to not fan talks of conflicts of interests and now the dean refused to believe that rose was being partial to her own sister i think she just didn't want to go to the trouble of replacing rose the nerds were heartbroken but i was still laughing in rose and jess i saw a kind of petty evilness that i could appreciate then for one of the papers that rose was covering we were assigned a practical project that required teamwork i was put in a group with a girl that i fancied and to impress her i threw my minimum effort policy out the window we worked on the paper together and our young adult rom-com had just begun taking shape by the time that we submitted the project together this girl and i were very much into each other then rose walked in and just took a dump on our project she made this paper part of our game and directed her nasty insults at both of us needless to say just got top marks with no effort it broke my girl's heart she sobbed on my shoulder my gallantry came into question and i was finally ready to settle some scores with rose but nothing major just a little sticking it to the man as i've mentioned this story is from 13 years ago and around then the world was just waking up to social media and our college wasn't too far behind in fact our department had quite a chatty group on one social media site rose and jess weren't in the group but some of the faculty were i started writing and posting long satirical sketches of rose that ridiculed her teaching abilities and poked at her extra love for her baby sister i was hoping to get some of the faculty to take notice but mostly i just wanted to be a dick to the sisterhood a few days in the post generated a lot of laughs among the students of the group but the faculty stayed away not to be discouraged i wrote my worst stinker of a skit caricaturing rose reddit i'll be honest i was not kind and i didn't mince my words it was a nasty piece of work meant to hurt i wrote it posted it and shared it with a few of my buddies who commented and forgot all about it here i need to pause my narrative and tell you folks about another stroke of misfortune that before me at this point one fine lazy afternoon between classes i had rolled myself a little doobie and smoked that thing in the college lou as i stepped out after washing my eyes i found the familiar face of professor slimy grinning at me with all the mischief and slime he could muster the air around us reeked of weed and professor slimy's grin grew broader he told me what my options were he could a tell my parents b tell the college c tell the cops or d i could suck his dick and he would forget about it all together i thought he must be joking but professor slimy held that stupid grin and i slunk out of the loo stoned and slightly scared to be honest i had no intention of getting sexually abused by professor slimy for smoking pots but i had no time to worry about that because i started getting frantic calls from classmates rose and jess had found out about the chat group in my posts jess had made a few calls crying to people and rose was livid the group's moderator one of our classmates panicked and deleted the entire thread i was summoned by the dean for an emergency meeting when i arrived in her room rose and jess were already there sobbing buckets calling me names and holding up printouts of my posts i'd come prepared for this and i proceeded to decimate their complaint with a well-constructed and elaborate speech on how rosa's nepotism is severely bad for the institution and student morale and that i was only questioning her actions satire was merely my tool to do so well you see my well-thought-out arguments did not appeal to the dean she didn't even know what nepotism meant and i had to explain the word to her i am not making this up this dean is now a local councilwoman she told me that i had slandered rosa's good name and i brought disrepute to the college with my actions they would have to throw me out this i was not expecting i thought my speech would do the trick i panicked after all the effort doddling through this course i needed the degree then gathering my wits i told the dean that my opinions weren't just mine alone the nerds had brought this to her attention as well the dean tried to downplay this saying the nerd issue had been dealt with but i called bs on that i demanded she involved my entire class to see whether they would back me up on this rose said they wouldn't and jess was sure of that too the dean agreed thinking this would sort everything out certainly no class would gang up against faculty like all bad managers she didn't realize that her quick fix solution would open a can of worms i was playing a gamble i had no idea what my class would say sure some of them had laughed and commented on the posts but would they really stand up for me i had no idea if my class even liked me but i guess the class had enough of rose or they just liked my satire the bottom line is when the dean assembled the class and called a vote on the matter our entire class apart from jess agreed that rose was unfair and nepotistic they backed me up i had never been particularly attached to my class except for the one girl but now i could kiss each and every one of them the dean had to agree that maybe just maybe rose was unfit for the job a departmental inquiry had to be instituted so these charges could be heard i wasn't going to be thrown out after all rose was not happy and i think she went to her church with it because soon i found myself in front of the president of the college along with rose and the dean rose painted it to seem like i had turned the class against her and i had inflicted psychological damage on jess the president consulted the dean heard everything that had happened and decided to let the inquiry make up its own mind at this point i began to suspect the department inquiry was going to be heavily stacked against me as an added bonus the president decided that the college needed an internet communication policy a protocol in what students and teachers can say or discuss about the college and its functioning over social media and the internet it was to include rules on how students and teachers interacted over the internet and recommend punishment for misdemeanors most of the college didn't know about this internet code being formulated i did because the dean and rose had both taken time from their busy teaching schedules to inform me that as soon as the internet code had been formulated i would be chucked out for my actions my days in college were numbered my girl cried some more on my shoulder i felt like a tragic hero a champion of the people who would take the fall for his brethren my class mourned me in this state of mind i returned to my dorm to find an email from professor slimy he wanted to know if i had decided about his offer and all this rose social media fiasco this had completely slipped my mind i wanted to write back telling professor slimy to f off now that i was getting chucked out his threats didn't matter but then something struck me i started exchanging emails with professor slimy and realized that he had no idea about the rose thing or the impending internet code he was external faculty this was godsent you see where this is going now well suffice to say that over the next couple of days over a series of emails with professor slimy i discussed my apprehensions about the offer and my hesitations because i wasn't gay i played the scared victim here and let him coax me into giving into his demand honestly i was just baiting him and waiting for the president's code to roll out sure enough a couple of weeks later our college unveiled its internet policy banning social media for both students and teachers alike and the usual set of guidelines to follow while interacting on the internet by now i'd gathered enough dirt on professor slimy so when the president summoned me for a disciplinary hearing under the new internet code i sat down and wrote the speech i was going to give to the president my girl was in on this and she helped me with it once i was confident about what to say i printed out the email exchange neatly bound it all together into one file and headed to the president's office a little bit before the appointed hour i met him and i showed him the entire email exchange i wanted to know how professor slimy's emails to me scored on this internet code book would it look good if i had to drag the professor a pastor at that and the college to court for sexual harassment what would a good christian town say about that that did the trick his tone changed he saw my angle in all of this and my promised action i also told the president that the dean sucked at her job which is why creeps like professor slimy and nepotistic turds like rose ran riot now i didn't want any of them rose the dean or professor slimy to be able to screw my career the president assured me that they wouldn't be capable of doing that but i had to keep my mouth shut about these emails i took the deal a week later i signed a non-disclosure with the college handed them all the printouts and deleted my emails under their lawyer supervision professor slimy's contact with the college was terminated and he was expelled from his church no one knew why his life was destroyed he hasn't had a job since and last i heard he was living with and off of his mother the dean was let go and she discovered a second career in politics and went on to become a councilwoman which she still is rose was let go as well while just finished college quietly without much fuss last i heard both sisters run a store together in town i graduated with distinction in all papers that rose and professor slimy handled thanks to the president's intervention this put me pretty high on the merit list and made the nerds jealous our next reddit post is from champion 5. 10 years ago i moved from my job i had forgotten about one of my tvs back home so i asked my dad to ship it to me this was on my company's account since they paid for the move a couple of days later the delivery driver from shipping company a drops it off the box was heavily damaged so i didn't sign for it the driver waited while i plugged it in and to no one's surprise it was damaged he said that he could take it back if i didn't want to sign for it and the shipper could file the claim i informed him that i was the shipper and i would file it here this was a small mistake but i've shipped thousands of parts through this company so i figured it wouldn't be a problem my claim was denied a month later this went back and forth for a couple of months with multiple emails to this old lady and she didn't care at all she was also very rude to me via email and phone now this company shipping company a has two separate entities parcel and freight we solely used the freight portion of shipping company a for all of our warehouses across the us i cut them off at my new store and started using company b it only took a month before a salesman from shipping company a stopped by when he showed up he asked why he was losing twenty thousand dollars worth of freight a month and i informed him of this 600 broken tv from his sister company a couple of months back he said that he couldn't do anything about that since it was a separate side of their company and he begged for the business back no dice this went back and forth for several months the average amount that we spent on shipping was 20 to 25 000 a month and this was a small town so they were very upset that it was only over a 600 tv i got a check in the mail about a year later after i shipped the tv along with a letter to their vice president so i guess this is the pro part fast forward a couple years and i've been promoted within my company to make certain decisions and one of them happens to be logistics none of our locations now use shipping company a on some months we spend well over a hundred thousand dollars on shipping but most months are around eight hundred thousand dollars company wide and this has been going on for several years now we also inform customers to use shipping company b since shipping company b is awesome and treats us very well since about 2011 we view shipping company b nationwide there's no telling how much shipping company a lost over a 600 tv oh don't worry op i'm sure we can figure it out opie said that most months are about 80k but some months go up to 100k so let's just average those together and say 90k 90k times 12 months equals 1 million eighty thousand dollars op said they made the switch in 2011 which is 10 years ago so multiply that by 10 and we get 10 million 800 000 whoops oh wait forgive me i forgot to factor in the 600 bucks for a new tv so what they actually lost was ten million eight hundred thousand and six hundred dollars that was our slash pro revenge and if you like this content check out my podcast where i publish the exact same episodes also hit that subscribe button because i put out new reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 622,734

Rating: 4.9459548 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, prorevenge, r/prorevenge, pro revenge

Id: 2FrjEbxaY6U

Length: 22min 1sec (1321 seconds)

Published: Sun Mar 28 2021