RoboCop (2014) - Nostalgia Critic

this episode brought to you by skill share classes taught by expert practitioners for your career or for your passions the first 500 people who sign up receive a free two-month trial [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] wonderful bring in the RoboCup script reduce the Artwalk EG 13 wasn't it being our what sucked people in well yeah but being pg-13 allows more people to see it even though more people won't want to see it cuz it's pg-13 it made more sense when the chart guy said it I thought we said no new ideas well we have to do something different or we might as well be a Disney remake different scares people you scare people so the focus groups tell me alright well start with new ideas and then never go anywhere with them that way everybody loses are you sure that's how studio's making money well the chart says good news we have Samuel Jackson perfect he's gonna be an amazing Robocop actually he's only in for a few minutes oh who do we have to play Robocop that boring guy from Suicide Squad which one never mind just go ahead with this not gonna make character ever matters you're gonna be a money-making [ __ ] [Music] [Music] yeah but not you because you're gonna be amazing people never forget about hey when are you guys gonna get to making my sequel oh sorry of Robocop movie that's not gonna happen yeah we're working on how to make money with another Pixar sequel good dinosaur - I forgot there was a condensed or one oh hey come on there is still potential yeah critically you weren't that big ahead and domestically you made only a little over half your money back but 49 percent on Rotten Tomatoes that's almost half and I did good on a worldwide release just like alien 3 and Warcraft those are the examples you went with come on just think of the Ghostbuster reboot attack Total Recall reboot Fantastic Four Lone Ranger that Tom Cruise mummy movie this is embarrassing for you Oh God how did things go so wrong I guess it was kind of inevitable when you remake something so unique and beloved wait how are you reviewing me if you also somehow made me do I segue that makes sense or a review which ever doesn't crap on mean they bout to throw [Music] Robocop was a gigantic eighties hit it had big action bloody gore in-your-face commentary and somebody losing their job for this effect the movie was so beloved that years later Detroit decide to make a Robocop statue holy [ __ ] I fight that for a dollar it was crazy awesome crazy awesome so naturally they had to reboot it in 2014 the director of elite squad give us a slightly different look at the action icon you failed to grab audiences and critics was forgotten fairly quickly but looking back with this a valiant effort that only had a glitch or was it a valiant effort that only had this glitch you called this a glitch well we're here to take a closer look let's try our best to give this movie our cooperation our soak through and in the movie that's kind of cool right you need to stop but alright this is Robocop 2014 so let's see how this dark and gritty reboot gets things going this time he's a pigeon it turns out this is Samuel Jackson doing vocal warm-ups let's be honest though if you want a more fitting Jackson quote to start this movie off you'd be like shame [ __ ] you he plays a commentator named Pat Novak which sounds like a fox news anchor who got fired for groping too much or not enough what if I told you that even the worst neighborhood in America could be made completely safe he's behind a big movement to replace cops and soldiers with machines as demonstrated with this live takedown in Iran they're the big boys they secure the perimeter it is great to see American machines helping to blow peace and freedom we could find out what's in your Safa kiss but it looks like suicide bombers are ready to take them out starting off light I see but I'm worried about the question issue television living under the Bombers attack yeah I'm positive the best way to start this movie off was wish but the original Robocop was dark and bloody yeah but that was over-the-top criminals and comic-book thugs this is frickin suicide bombers in the Middle East I mean I guess if it ties in to the rest of the story it makes sense but we never come back to it this is the only scene in Iran so what's the point in showing this disturbing overseas warfare it's just uncomfortable imagine if you were watching the cartoon and they were suddenly like I'm not wish to see Lewis hurt because of me so you do have feelings for me it gives me flashbacks to the religious jihadis I had to kill because they claimed countless American lives if only political strategists could figure out how to wash the blood from my soul by my toys I would watch that and buy his toys for security reasons the Pentagon's going to cut our feed yeah she did on the one hand we have Raymond Sellars wow that's amazing the film's coolness levels went up by 20 percent by simply putting Michael Keaton and Samuel Jackson on the same screen but what do you expect when they come from this kid so we cut to our main character Murphy played by Joe Kinmen at least I think it's him it's hard to tell if the cameras shaking so much that's nothing personal you've got to be dumb or dirty maybe if you hadn't gone off the reservation your partner it'd still be standing weekend this time it's without a tripod and I can't really tell has he become the emotionless robot yet I mean Jack we've been doing some Street buys we got some problems back home with Chicago PD I'm gonna go hard nothing like a madness my father's ain't even been there it's not like the original Murphy was Robert E friggin Niro there's some truth to that the idea behind Murphy and the first ones we saw him mostly as the machine and we found out more about connection to his family as it moved on he created a little bit of a mystery to his humanity revealing how soft and sentimental he really was yes in my version you see him with the family early on and you suck at only from every conceivable angle in this version the scenes with him and the family are boring as sin there's no playfulness no energy no joking around he's just the same overly serious stick-in-the-mud as in all the other scenes this was a chance to really add to his personal life really explore his humanity but you just keep him stiff and bland hey guys just because he's like an extra in those Street movies Mark Wahlberg does in his spare time doesn't mean he's not deep couldn't you haven't smile at least once or maybe tell a joke okay how's this for a joke why did the chicken cross the road I don't know to get to the pretentious [ __ ] house knock knock who's there the chicken I'm sorry I just wanted to remind people I was still here so Keaton plays the head of Omnicorp please no accent please no accent please no access I need to give Americans a product they can love oh thank Christ as this analyst tries to work out a way to win the government and the public over to expand the machines to what Jay Baruchel in the role it sounds like they're trying to figure out how to save DreamWorks Animation my team have come up with a pretty aggressive new campaign it's not another How to Train Your Dragon is it how - of course not they want a product the conscience I'm sorry I can't hear a thing over your paintings how am I supposed to not focus on that can't even show those on YouTube means a machine they decide to add a human touch boy are you in the wrong film for that as they go to a doctor who specializes in robotic limbs for amputees Commissioner Gordon Batman Keaton fills him in on the plan and all they're looking for now is the perfect subject to give up all human emotion hello Wow that would have been really surprising and effective if we didn't see them plant the bond there earlier takes away a little bit from the shock doesn't it once you just start off the sixth sense with Haley Joel Osment saying hi dad as you can see Murphy's lost two limbs has burns all over his body but somehow his face actually looks better than before the accident damn I wish my car would blow up so I could clear out my pores it's you they put him in his Robo body but he doesn't react well to it clearly we picked the right test subject to be fair who'd have thought he had a personality to wake what scientific theory backed that dumb move let him roam through our highly expensive equipment in an unstoppable killer suit immediately after choking me I'm sure the little scamp will Tucker himself out ah this is where they make those Japanese Robocop commercials oh look at him ride the kitchen [Music] fear not though look a doctor it's a foolproof way to prevent this from going any further please stop stay where you are thank you Alex don't make me say please do I have to count to twenty two thousand four hundred eighty-two definitely there's a way to shut him down Robo crop this time it's really hard to make a joke about this one did the movies credit we do get the only nightmarish moment I could see being in the original when they show how much of his human body is actually left because there's nothing left your body may have gone but you're still here you're still the same boring dumbass you always were you're in control then I want to die but what do I say to your wife what does she say to your son I died I guess Murphy's kind of a dick in this version I mean god so much of the original was him trying to remember and reconnect with his family but here just tell him I died no more parent-teacher conferences am i right I guess the idea is his family meant so much he couldn't stand the idea of them seeing him like that but a because it was so lifeless we never really got an idea of what his family life was like be if you'll love each other you should be happy to see one another no matter what the circumstance and see the circumstances kind of forget awesome you have a bulletproof body your kid will always have a giant action figure to play with and if they did their job right so will your wife it seems like more pros than cons this time there's a family plan we're gonna get through this baby we're gonna make it like it was you know can you really take this scene that seriously with that kids picture there of all the ones to pick in a dramatic moment that's the one you went with he's looking at him like bubble cap you cray-cray he looks like he should have meme text under him Moyes entity person let's give him a nice hook him up with that TX crumpet from Terminator 3 they test him in a simulation to see how he handles a crime scene compared to a robot I do give credit I feel like the original director of air hoping would have played the Tin Man song here too but I think we all know he used this line differently five point six seconds behind scenario failure you wouldn't buy that for a dollar Oh piss off hey you want a side-by-side comparison let's try that scene which would you rather see the rest of wouldn't buy that for a dollar coincidentally neither would Best Buy murphy decides to search the internet so he uses Bing I take it back this movie has a better sense of humor than I thought to find out more about the people who did this to him detective Murphy was simply overzealous okay we have absolutely no evidence linking balance of the attempt in his life you know why are they let him search for stuff that could upset him you saw what the mere act of waking him did how is this gonna balance out it's about as consistent as the sunlight in that back window that Sun is not a cooperative actor Keaton sees Robocop's delays in the side-by-side comparison it says exactly what the makers of fall assembly 6 said while in development when I have got a release date we've gotta make it okay I don't care how you do it come on can you help me get it fixed I don't care how you do it just go do it a moment of silence for those who pre-ordered that so they make some literal mental notes I'm gonna put you to sleep top oh yeah I was gonna ask why you didn't do that before oh I'm gonna fix it rated pg-13 it says alien vs. predator the Dark Knight the Last Crusade drag me to hell ratings are a joke it really put the fear of God into the prisoners let's go with black it's cuz your Batman is yeah cuz I'm Batman so they paint in black which is a shame because aside from the visor that looks like a darkwing duck henchman the suit actually looked pretty good but now it just looks like Christopher Nolan directing the tick it's just bland and forgettable they finally put him to the test against both robots and people trying to take him down by God is this that thing the other Robocop movies called action and this seems a little off though when you hear the musical choice he'll kind of selection is that you'll don't come this time it's in the middle of the simulation they drop an interesting concept system releases signals into Alex's brain making him to think he's doing what our computers are actually I mean out exploring is right now he is in control but he's not it's the illusion of free will like you think if you don't go see this film they're gonna start making original movies again he passes the test with flying colors that is if this movie had any other colors apart from brown and you finally decides he's ready to see his family have you heard the Robo news Omni Corp saves I was gonna ask you if you were say or counter but I thought that one was funny or had seriously I miss to you know I miss you buddy please doubt the rush of emotion is overwhelming saved all the right wing schemes in my compare you did oh it's a smile don't fly off the handle like that buddy keep it together how did you went home already sorry yeah no yeah I forgot he had a partner remember what a big role the partner played in the first one one of the big connections back to his personality his soul his work his humanity now here it's just a couple of lines like yes I know you the right color now you look like the Mega Man version of get out so the big premiere day arrives and only now do they decide to do this procedure that could screw everything up I think it's gonna screw everything up we're gonna upload the entire DPD database and do your brain what is this that's his weird he's going to pieces while watching himself literally go to pieces I'm so glad we showed him this before he went public his mind is out of control so they decide to take out his emotions to pretty much make him like the original Robocop I feel fine but more so yeah all those cool scenarios that could have been played out figuring out who's making the choices and an ER machine recycle bin that [ __ ] it's just a machine now Christ why did you just start off with that like in the original if you're not gonna do anything with this concept his emotional journey wasn't that interesting because you know you need a motion and now there's no question whether or not it's the man or the machine making the choices we just know it's the machine except for the obvious stuff we know is coming where the human part is gonna take control again how much more interesting would it be if like in this scene from the original you had the question was that the coldness of the machine or the coldness of the human you don't really know it's kind of up for you to decide what's the first time didn't introduce that option this one did and they're not doing anything with it damn it this could have been an interesting story about choice a Detroit becoming Robocop if you will but it's all thrown out for a simplified version of the original where he just talks like a robot and captures criminals tomah's King you're under arrest in fact he even captures a rapist at the premiere because he recognized him from the police files here is just steps away from two of Detroit's finest you know that's another thing the commentary in this sucks - in the other film the environment is insane and rotten and greedy and we see it through all these newscasters it's like a cinematic version of the media from Dark Knight Returns but here is just one guy one guy that's the world-building that's just one guy that's like saying we know what the world is like by only listening to Bill Maher whoo I didn't know the world didn't give a [ __ ] about Stanley good thing we had this totally balanced source to go off of don't you see it's a satire of extreme points of view like CNN MSNBC or the Disney Channel then why don't you have more than one point of view how much more interesting with this film be if it incorporated new developments like social media message boards phone apps in the over 27 years since the last one came out you could have taken this in so many different directions but somehow you actually do less than what the original film did well what would they say hey why did that criminal on the run show up to an event filled with cops with cops [Music] no I think I'm pointing that way Jarrett it's okay he's not 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because there's giant wheels on you I was unaware of that version thank you and Pia Murphy's wife tries to talk with him but robotic side takes control yeah I think again it's hard to tell sometimes klaren please stand aside you need to speak to your son right now I see three crimes in progress lazy riding tall to writing and stilted acting I'll let me at that last one was me but he decides to go to his old home to figure out if he can solve the mystery of the bomb he'll I already saw that lazy riding doll directing and stilted acting [Music] debo cop this time just don't get it man I even blow up oaring he's I'm doing what scripts to try to go into it so we'll just say love his mission is now clear as he sets out for revenge [Applause] now I hope I can beat my high score yeah at this point all you can think about is how awesome this would be if it was a gate actually yeah would be if this was an updated Robocop game in 2014 and it was about choice as well as action no joke this will probably be a much better product imagine the scene where he finds out his own unit caused the car bomb as a movie it's nothing but how much more shocking would it be if it happened to you in a game you figured it out for yourself and you have a choice what to do about it you tipped him off today you try to kill me twice but it's not a game it's just a dumb movie so they shut him down and make eating the easy bad guy whoa didn't see that coming what's bigger than a hero I don't know I don't have a say in which chart in front of me dead hero now the audience response to this disagrees so keen as the good doctor to kill the fallen Robocop I won't fall funny ten years new staff on my own people deal yeah they're really gonna make old men the bad guy hey on top of that I hear this guy has it in for Pinocchio what a shock Oldman fries Murphy but Keaton tells his wife that he's dead tennis psychotic break he killed an unarmed colleague we did everything everything you know I can see why he was Birdman and vulture his movements are very foul like had a psychotic break oh he killed a colleague we did everything everything we could doctors couldn't save him we're going to be making the announcement shortly this time it was just too good not to use again she believes in though as he gets ready to announce it to the news look at this city so beautiful I have very sad news Alex Murphy passed away just hours ago starts off a news announcement like that I don't care what you're announcing that's just weird imagine if I was like look at this town so grand so open so unassuming I have some sad tragic news the IHOP down the street closed Robocop Burson the Omni Corp to discover oh yeah those things were in the movie - Frank know he wants us to do this damn it Frank you're off the Christmas card list I guess that is a more impressive take down that stairs what was that Robocop makes it to the top of the building where his wife and kid are buddies program not to kill kita if you go against the program the entire system shuts down oh you don't even have a warrant now I'm sorry I can't hear anything over that intense Detroit wind being so high up on a building it's just so loud and blowing everyone's hair around Who am I kidding I wish I couldn't hear it's I didn't have to listen to callbacks like this because I'm the only one with the technology to keep you alive Dead or Alive you're coming with me does that even make sense in this one if I'm dead or alive you're coming with me as my corpse gonna rest you but Keaton isn't done well Keating if I wanted to I could have killed you a long time ago I just named this ready Dredd I mean if I wanted to like just saying the secure little family I could just kill them too you know it's kind of like a male Ellen thing you know just little spurts and the hands and just saying was obviously going on these little spurts and hands and just saying what's obviously going out these little spurts and had oh now I'm shot just gonna lay here on the ground and anticlimactic at least my arms are the same size what the hell was that [Music] you know Keenan's character really was so odd and eccentric where do you think a guy like that goes when he dies Murphy of course ends up surviving and may even give him back his old color suit oh hey better close that door so we don't get any accidental emotion in this oh come on I was just kidding they're really doing that you're not even gonna show a hug emotions it can be a thing it ends with the law being changed about machines which ignites Nick furious anger the fact that this mother is not serving [ __ ] it's pg-13 you can get one f-bomb you took away Samuel Jackson's one that Bob you know the real nightmares futures the one that has I'm talking like this pg-13 Robocop so okay this is not a good remake or reboot but I'd be lying if I said it was as bad as I thought it would be the supporting cast is mostly good the ideas are interesting starts and it made me realize this could be taken in different directions hell it can even kind of start in a different direction by showing Murphy's emotional side early but the emotional stuff is just not well done this movie either needed a lot more over-the-top insanity to top the original a lot more hard to make it more emotional and or just follow through with its ideas as is it's just another remake that's already being forgotten and it's a shame because I see now it could have been something really cool if there was just a touch more creative cooperation in the end it's just a robo mess now if you'll excuse us we're gonna try and figure out another clumsy money-making scheme so I guess I am totally useless surely there must be something I can do to prove my worth I know why don't I find Malcolm he has been gone for some time hasn't he movie I thought you understood you are Malcolm what he was mailed to us in several different parts so we figured instead of putting him back together again we'll make him into something new wait you brought me back to life as a Robocop movie don't act like you haven't tried that nobody has right back and since you didn't make back your money I suppose we can give you back your memory and put you back together the way you were will I remember any of this do you remember any of the Robocop reboot we just reviewed it and I can't remember okay sounds about right I'm gonna stab the critic I remembered because who the hell remembers the Robocop reboot [Music] planes three there are planes too what the [ __ ] is planes [Laughter] [Applause] [Music] [Music] hey dub Walker here doing the charity shout out and this week we are doing the fistula foundation fistula is the disease in many developing countries that affects pregnant women sadly in many countries these women are outcast and shamed by their society but the fistula foundation can help they believe no woman should endure a life of misery and isolation simply for trying to bring a child into the world that's why they're dedicated to ending the suffering caused by this as it's an injury that can be treated through surgery through their generous donors they provide human and financial resources that enable as many women as possible to receive the treatment they need every site they fund is coordinated and staffed by local nurses and trained doctors who understand the community and how to provide the best care possible to the women they treat if you look at their site in their YouTube channel you can see all the women that have been held by this organization and all the good people who have helped give them their lives back click on the link and see what you can do to help these women live their normal lives you

Channel: Channel Awesome

Views: 1,812,459

Keywords: channel awesome, doug walker, nostalgia critic, movie, film, robocop, robocop 2014, robocop remake, robocop movie, new robocop, robocop review, movie review, film review, bad remakes, worst remake, old vs new robocop, tamara chambers, joel kinnaman, gary oldman, michael keaton, samuel l. jackson, abbie cornish, robocop 2014 review

Id: 2QuphwIuL48

Length: 32min 59sec (1979 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 16 2019