r/Maliciouscompliance Teacher: "Write A 4000 Word Essay On ONE PAGE!" Students: "OK"

welcome to r slash malicious compliance where a manager learns that it's best not to mess with your star employee our next reddit post is from wirin this happened about a decade ago at my first job it was an i.t analytics services firm in india i'm from india and while work was interesting the hours were insane and folks used to work 12 hours a day usually since we always had conference calls with our counterparts sitting in the us we ended our work day pretty late 10 pm was my usual time due to this people used to come into the office late in the morning as well usually the entire team would be in the office by noon management was not happy about this so they went ahead and decided that everybody had to be in by 10 am and if you're not then they'll dock you half a day pay we were all salaried employees managers were supposed to enforce this but they didn't care so occasionally hr people would stand next to the office entrance to implement the policy on one such day i was 15 minutes late and hr stopped me at the gate and informed me that they'll be docking me half a day's pay i stopped for a second thought about it and left the hr person stopped me with a shocked expression on their face and asked where are you going i replied back home see you at lunch and went back home ignoring his feeble protest i actually ended up calling my manager and just took a day off after this incident i heard similar stories from other people and hr just stopped enforcing this policy man what are these people gonna learn i'm gonna punish you by giving you less work oh no not less work anything but that well bye i guess see you on monday our next reddit post is from riley smiley so i work for a grocery store as a personal shopper for their in-house grocery pickup and delivery service not to toot my own horn but i am uncontestedly the fastest and best employee in the entire day shift for context i can pick around 100 to 120 unique items per hour while the average person does around 60 which is the expected minimum it's safe to say that this department relies on me quite heavily to the point where the department manager has to find two people to replace me when i can't come to a shift this is mainly because i find the job pretty boring so i throw in an airpod and listen to music i'm fast mainly because it makes me feel like i'm actually doing something while i'm here it's also important to note that there's no incentive for me to perform more than anyone else i don't get paid more there's no recognition i just do it because it keeps me busy now one of the assistant store managers doesn't like me i can't figure out the reason but she doesn't either way she decided today that it would now be a rule that you couldn't listen to music while picking groceries because they didn't know what i was listening to nothing in relation to not being able to hear customers which i could anyways now i asked others about this rule and they hadn't been told anything and were still wearing earbuds and listening to music now it's important for us to have at least a one hour buffer it allows us to call customers to review changes major their order and then adjust anything as per the request this is how we ensure customer satisfaction today it was really busy and we could barely keep that buffer up even with me at full productivity and that's when i was told that i could listen to no more music that's when things began to nosedive and fast within half an hour we had lost half of our buffer and by the time i was done with my pick we had completely lost it the assistant manager is now being chewed out by the general manager because we're behind and that's a serious issue she then looks at the chart that shows our pick rates and asks him where i am explaining that we shouldn't be behind with me there all the while i'm sitting there taking my sweet time writing bin tags until she confronts me and asks me why i'm picking so slowly i explained that i had no obligation to go above and beyond and that because there was a clear double standard being held i didn't see a reason to perform at a higher level than the rest of the department after the cogs in her head finally stopped turning she realized that it's probably best if she allows me to listen to my music and sent me on my way within two hours i had created a one-hour buffer again needless to say she learned an important lesson in cause and effect today that i doubt she'll be forgetting soon our next reddit post is from ruck this past christmas my mom just told me her malicious compliance story she was looking for stocking stuffers for the whole family and found a lindor chocolate coupon online 150 pieces for like 40 bucks which is a pretty good deal she didn't read the coupon but she screenshotted and brought it to her local outlet store to pick out the treats in person it was a tad busy in the store so she waited in line and when it was her turn she showed the coupon the conversation went as follows hi i have this coupon i'd like to pick out my chocolates the clerk inspects the coupon sorry that's for online orders or if you can call it in we can package it for you okay so i can't pick out the chocolates i'll need to call it in i'm here now sorry that's what the coupon says next so my mom steps out of line and pulls out her phone the clerk turns around and answers the phone hi i'd like to place an order for 150 pieces of chocolate can you please provide me with your full menu one by one the clerk turns around mortified and quietly says please just pick out the chocolate you want we'll honor the coupon and down in the comments we have this story from anomalous cowherd a few years ago the local electronics store had much cheaper prices online than in the store but i hadn't realized i picked up what i wanted in the store and i was shocked when the higher price rang up i asked them to give me the online price and the smug guy behind the counter said they couldn't do that i walked off and left the item by the checkout then i walked outside ordered online for collect in the store and walked back in the smug checkout guy wasn't happy when i went back to his checkout to collect my order and pointed out that it sat right next to the tail already within a few months they made the prices the same everywhere i guess i wasn't the only one doing this our next reddit post is from routine condition many moons ago before the 2008 recession i manager of the records department worked in an industry where record keeping is super critical bad records means no more business because one of the many government agencies would shut you down sometimes permanently my direct boss who reported to the ceo was a good person but he was overworked and he would grab onto any idea as long as it kicked the can down the road at which point the problem was worse he needed to go but the ceo liked his results despite how negatively they impacted production and morale in short my boss had to go away and i needed to be the one reporting to the ceo so i waited until he grabbed onto an idea that was so terrible that it just had to be exploited my boss came in and told me to stop the record keeping all of it he told me the salesperson for our software provider informed him that the software could do all of that for us my boss was even kind enough to send me a direct email stating all of this i called my team in and told them the news we were all horrified and we knew this would come back to bite us all the software in question could do the job but it was never set up or configured to meet the requirements i'd already spoken to legal in our government contacts a few months earlier about having software to do this and we're required to inform them and submit samples of it prior to going live none of that was ever done so we kept doing our job as normal and strangely no one asked any questions until the quarterly meetings my boss apparently had not informed the ceo of his planned and had instead decided to show the cost savings he had implemented the quarterly meeting thankfully our accountant was a sharp-eyed person and she immediately started questioning things from the information i received from the other folks who were there at the meeting the accountant asked how this was possible and my boss confidently told him that he stopped the record-keeping requirements and the software was taken care of that now the it people who knew what was required to be compliant apparently created a sound akin to a record needle scratch it stated we were months away from implementation legal chimed in and pointed out that we were now in a seriously bad legal position the ceo turned white before assuming a wondrous red tinge much shouting was heard apparently the salesperson told me it would work was not a good excuse suddenly my phone rings and it's the ceo i'm ordered to the conference room i smile grab my folder of evidence inform my team that i might not be back and it's been fun and walk towards my fate i walk into a scene that i would have loved to have taken a picture of the ceo legal and i.t are all up in arms my boss looks defeated because he now understands how big of an issue this is i grab a seed and listen to the lamenting of the masses when it's my turn to talk i calmly explain my side of things the ceo loved that direct email from my boss telling me to stop record keeping after letting that sink in i calmly told them of my insubordination for the good of the company the uninterrupted status of the record keeping and how we're not in a pile of trouble but in fact we're 100 compliant there was a collective sigh of relief i then told them that moving forward i would like to be out from under my boss's management and would prefer to report directly to the ceo to my surprise they agreed and within the week my boss was moved to places he could inflict less damage while having more eyes on his actions look at me i'm the boss now and when someone asked opp gotta raise op adds i got an extra bonus that year no added responsibilities which i suppose shows how much my boss contributed this just cleared some administrative clutter and made my job easier and no more crazy half-baked patches to our issues our next reddit post is from nouron sauce during undergrad i worked in a deli in a major supermarket most of my co-workers were also in college and we all got along and generally had a good time we usually didn't have too much trouble but for some reason a couple of managers decided that they didn't like one of my co-workers let's call him corey they would nitpick his work and give him a hard time for things the rest of us never got in trouble for one morning they decided that his five o'clock shadow warranted a beard net now this was an unusual request considering that one no one without a beard had ever been told to do this before and two he barely had any stubble and three they made a big deal about it and seemed to be trying to make him feel bad about it cue the malicious compliance managers aside i was the only female employee in the department at the time so i stroll up and ask what's going on they point out as stubble i respond that i'm certain that i have eyebrow hairs longer than that and in mod concern i asked if i should be wearing my hair net over them the managers sort of look at each other and hesitantly say no you don't need to do that i ask why not because it's likely that my eyebrow hairs would be in someone's food if we're worried about chin stubble they persist that no i shouldn't worry about it then i ask about the fine hairs on a woman's face what about those should i be shaving they're catching on now they tell corey to put a beard net on and leave he does and so do i solidarity i don't think i've seen so many people double take and start laughing before the customers in my indirect managers thought it was hilarious when they asked me about it i would just say that i was protecting the food in the store from any potential hairs or real or imagined by noon when the original pair of managers returned i was having a very good day they begged me to take the beard net off and i pointed out that there was nothing in the store policy saying that i couldn't wear personal protection equipment which included beard nets i wore until the end of my shift that day they never bothered corey about his stubble after that our next reddit post is from mahway i work in a highly specialized field where it's very difficult to find and train suitable personnel by pinching pennies and not holding his promises about pay grade changes my boss successively drove away three specialists working in the department that i led right before the last one put in or notice my boss argued that a two-person department didn't justify a leadership position and demoted me and we were integrated with another department this was done outside of any legal framework and with a one-week notice which is illegal during the reorganization the manager of the department that we joined was assigned to r d and another manager and his deputy were promoted to lead the department's daily business we effectively had three supervisors all of them lacking managerial training and technical knowledge about the duties of our now defunct apartments and only one of them could read the language in which 50 of our reports were written right after the reorganization i was granted one last meeting with the boss where i pointed out that several of my duties can't be bestowed upon the mere foot soldier that i'd become nor taken over by the new leadership he answered that his decision was final i was to revert to my previous job description and take up any future matter with my new supervisors i did just that and more i read the state law about state and university employees i should have done that earlier in hindsight i discovered that one the illegal move that my boss made doesn't carry any penalties so there's nothing i can do about that legally two i'm allowed to take on private mandates for anything that's not explicitly mentioned in my job description three i get to take up to 15 days of additional paid leave per year to hold a public office 4. the paygrade that i reverted to doesn't match my responsibilities today even excluding the absence of a leadership position and there's an independent procedure with state hr to re-evaluate my pay grade the kicker my old job description that dates back to seven years before is short to say the least three lines that don't even cover fifty percent of what my duties in the last seven years consisted of also i have a side gig as a retained firefighter and fire instructor and i used to take vacation days to work those this counts as a public office according to state law the fallout my new managers both signed the authorization to take on private mandates in public office without understanding the implications i used all of the 15 days where i legally get paid by the fire department and my employer at the same time i took on several private mandates totaling nearly an additional month of salary for four days work also the pay grade re-evaluation brought me back to my previous income level oh and since my specialty now has a bus factor of one and my new supervisors have been unable to staff the open positions it was very unlucky that i felt ill at a time when i had to submit paperwork for a research grant costing the institution 30 000 in lost research funds our next read a post is from lunatic 976 when i was a college sophomore we had this professor mrs wing in religious studies who would act like her subject should be our top priority although we came from different majors religion studies is just a filler subject needed for students in our catholic college she wanted us to come to every meeting because attendance is part of the grade which was fine by me but she would give us too many research assignments for so little time this class is a tuesday thursday one so if she gave us three research assignments on tuesday she was expecting us to submit the assignments by thursday the same week this created a problem for all of us since we have a lot of things to do for our other classes but it would be a hassle to fail a subject like this retaking a major subject is acceptable but retaking your filler subject is annoying one tuesday she gave us an assignment a 4 000 word essay to be submitted on thursday 4 000 is a lot for us given the time frame and that was the week before midterm so it gave us a hard time but here's the catch she wanted our essay on a single sheet of short bond paper it's literally impossible to fit a 4 000 word essay on one page a classmate of mine nathan asked mrs wang about the single page saying nathan asked if we could submit multiple pages to accommodate the 4 000 word essay you're all stubborn 4 000 word essay on a single page it's that simple mrs wang was in her early 60s at the time so i don't think she had an idea of what a compressed 4 000 word essay would look like on a single page when printed for every subject we have a facebook group for announcements discussion between classmates and note sharing in some subjects the teacher was usually the administrator of the group but since mrs wing was not too fond to facebook one of our classmates volunteered to create the group for us the night before the submission we were having a problem with our essays some classmates who were done with our essay tried to print it out and the font was too small even though they adjusted the margins here comes the malicious compliance nathan who was still a little pissed about the whole situation posted a status on our group let's give her what she wants 4 000 words in a single page the comments were blowing up some said they were thinking of doing the same thing and others were laughing back then the hahaha reaction button was still a thing so hahahas were filling up the comments the next day we were all excited about our plan one by one we placed our papers on our desk as she was scanning the papers she went ballistic why are the words on these so small nathan raised his hand ma'am you were clear about a 4 000 word essay on a single page that's what it looks like mrs wayne couldn't contain her anger she realized she was wrong instead of apologizing she just told us to reprint our essays and submit them on tuesday next week we all agreed and then opie shares another short story there was this one time miss wing saw a classmate who dyed her hair red not totally red but a natural looking red and commented satan likes to prey on people who color their hair out of curiosity i wanted to know what a 4 000 word essay looked like condensed down into one page so here you go that was our slash malicious compliance and if you like this content check out my patreon where i publish extra episodes also hit that subscribe button because i put out new reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 1,562,604

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Id: 8LGq_C4OCC4

Length: 17min 48sec (1068 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 06 2021