r/Bestof I Took a 7 Year "Break" From my Husband & Kids

Welcome to our best of redditor updates where op finds out that his marriage is a lie and for the past 10 years his wife has been secretly in love with his best friend our next Reddit post comes from r slash marriage my wife married me because of my best friend this sounds fake it sounds like a drama script I don't effing care I need to get it out somewhere or I'm gonna go nuts we're all from the same school apparently my wife had a huge crush on my best friend since junior high and my best friend knew about this it's been 10 years since we got married and my wife still loves him that makes it 10 plus years of one-sided love from her to him and 12 years of my one-sided love to her she only got close to me and dated me so that she could stay in touch with my best friend she wanted to be a part of his life no matter what so she chose me as a scapegoat and here I thought she loved me how did I find this out she told me three weeks ago why did she tell me because I decided that we were ready for a child and I brought up the discussion over dinner she told me that she could make love to me she could marry me and even act like she loved me and obviously did a pretty good job at it but she can bear to give birth to a child that's mine and not his she can't give birth to a child that looks like me and not him so she can't have my child then she left me that day she didn't even say sorry not that that would make it any better but she did say that she did her best did her best and that it is what it is that's the end of the story I have no more to tell she just left and she's not picking up my calls emails texts or whatever way of contacting her I haven't reached out to my best friend either I know that they're not together actually maybe I'll be happy for her if she does end up with him at this point and here I I am not feeling anything and I'm not sure if this is normal this feels like a big play I'm not even sure if I put this right into text I'm sorry this is a mess then down in the comments op adds some more clarifying details we did talk about kids before this a couple of times actually but I wasn't very serious about it until now she said that she wasn't really into having kids yet and she just wanted to enjoy ourselves when we could she made it clear that she isn't seeking a relationship with my friend she told me that she doesn't really imagine having a relationship with him and that's just how it's going to be for whoever knows how long I know this sounds weird but she told me that this whole one-sided love is a bit of a permanent habit of hers that she can't get rid of ever I don't know if she ever sought therapy for this no I don't intend to continue this marriage this marriage was meant to break from the very start and now that I think about it then four days later Opie posted an update I met up with my buddy last night and asked him what's in new drink a bit and finally I brought up this conversation it was not easy to bring up he was shocked of course probably just as much as I was he didn't know what to say for a long time it seems like my wife never contacted him even after she left I asked him did my wife ever say that she has feelings for you to that he said a long time ago yes she did say that she had feelings for me but that was more than a decade ago long before you two were dating when we were all young and dumb we talked for a long time about a lot of things mostly about our past our school years college Years life everything my friend didn't have to be involved in this messy story but my selfish self decided that it was a good idea to talk to him about it I regret it he said sorry even though it wasn't his fault I'm a terrible person for this and as for my wife we're meeting up in two weeks if you ask why two weeks she sent me an email saying that she's in another country three because she also felt like she needed to go off somewhere to put things together and she'll return in two weeks she wants to meet up for a talk and I agreed to it then four months later Opie posted an update to make things short my wife died and I'm a widower you may say what the f after reading this but she did die it was suicide we met shortly after the email she sent me believe it or not it was not pretty I thought that I could keep myself together but I ended up going crazy never have I cried so much in my life and never have I been so used in my life I honestly sincerely deeply felt the meaning of betrayal my conversation with her was basically me just repeating why'd you do this to me how could you do this to me why did you marry me and why did you have to tell me this now she didn't really give a clear answer to my questions she was mostly quiet and she only gave answers that made me even more emotional one thing I do remember was her saying I'm sorry after more meaningless conversations I said I wanted a divorce not loving me was one thing but to deceive me for over a decade is another she agreed to it since we agreed to a year of Separation before marriage we got separated and that was that I told her to sincerely F off and to never show herself in front of me ever again and then she died a week after my wife left I got a phone call from my mother-in-law telling me that my wife died she took pills and didn't wake up again she didn't leave a note or any messages to anyone she just left for good and that was that the funeral took place but I couldn't go my best friend went and I hope she's happy with that it's been three months since she died a deep trauma has taken place inside of me and I've been seeking therapy since it hasn't gotten better but with that I'm at least functioning at the bare minimum of a human being at least I don't think I'll ever find a resolution from this incident my life has been torn apart and my entire self can't function the way it used to if this post is a mess I'm sorry this is the best that I can do some of you may find my story disturbing or even think that I made it up I don't really care if you find it a lie I myself have a hard time believing this and I'm still processing it this is the last post that I will ever make there is no meaning in life anymore but for me I'll have to go on oh man that story was rough to get through op best wishes God what she did to you is it feels like it should be illegal to just emotionally torture someone like that and completely ruin 10 years of their life I don't even understand what this woman's plan was was she planning on just I don't know hoping that the guys randomly falls in love with her but she just never made a move and our next way to post comes from r slash am I the butthole am I the butthole for for trying to get back into my kids lives I'm a 28 year old woman and I have three kids with my ex who's 30. we were never married but we dated while I was in college my senior year I got pregnant and had twin boys my boyfriend moved me in with him and we were raising our kids together 14 months after giving birth to the boys I had a girl it immediately after I had postpartum depression I was not doing well and I decided to go back home to my parents to try to clear my head once home I saw my old bedroom my old things and I was kind of reminded of what I always wanted to do I had always wanted to take a gap year to travel but I'd gotten a scholarship to my first choice school and it seemed silly to pass it up I decided then that this is what I needed to get in the right mental state I called my boyfriend and told him that I'm going to Europe for a couple of months he was outraged and tried to talk me out of it I explained that this is what I needed to go back to being myself and be a better parent and partner so I went he called me the first couple of months and kept asking if I was coming back eventually he stopped calling about six months in my parents told me that he had filed to get full custody of the kids I was mad that he didn't tell me before doing it oh my God but I thought that I would at least take full advantage and really see the world and get it out of my system I traveled for a little over two years and visited every continent every continent no way including Antarctica op probably isn't including Antarctica there's no way when I was done I really wanted to see my kids but I felt guilty for not being present in their lives and I didn't want to face my ex one of the friends that I made in my travels offered me a gig as an English teacher in a private school in Thailand I took the opportunity and spent the next three years doing that this year I returned Stateside and stayed with my parents they showed me pictures of the kids and told me that my ex let them see the kids a couple of times I got in touch with him telling him that I was ready to be involved in their lives and he flat out refused I threatened to sue for custody and he just replied good luck with that and then sent me pictures of me partying in Europe they are not flattering my parents want to see their grand grandkids more but they tell me that it's all my fault for not being able to see them am I the butthole for not trying to see them okay okay before I get into the update on this I I don't know where the update is going but there's something I want to point out that's really subtle and I don't know if it's true this is pure speculation but Opie points out that her parents want to be involved in the kids life however the ex only lets them see the kids a couple of times so that kind of has me wondering why is that why would the ex-husband not want his parents in law to be involved in the kid's life because obviously he's been abandoned by his wife you think he'd want all the help he can get right well here's my theory this is my guess I think what's Happening Here is Opie said that she lived two years abroad visiting every single continent my guess is that op's parents were bankrolling her adventures because two years traveling and never working that's gonna be insanely expensive we're talking tens of thousands of dollars so my guess is that op was off parting on mommy and daddy's dime while her boyfriend was struggling to raise three kids without a partner that's just a guess I can't back this up but if it's true that makes this story even worse then down in the comments we have this update Reddit it's my time to shine I had to make a brand new account to not reveal anything personal I know exactly who this is I know the kids and the dad those kids were raised by a wolf pack when this pathetic waste of oxygen abandoned her kids basically anyone and everyone who had a passing relation to the dad stepped up his mom moved in for the first year to help with the babies neighbors friends and relatives all donated or bought kids stuff for them clothes diapers toys anything he needed one of his friends manages a restaurant and he brought them unused food almost every night I work at a bank so I had nothing useful to contribute other than money and time one of our buddies runs a mixed martial arts gym and he is a kids class that starts after school so he takes them in after school until their dad gets off work whenever the kids need a babysitter two or three Rowdy men show up to be horses or punching bags for the boys and tea party guests for the little girl one of our other friends is a lawyer he helped his dad gain custody and advised him through the process op's parents are rich and they always offer money to help I knew do it I knew it I mean strictly speaking this doesn't actually confirm that op's parents were bankrolling op's parties in Europe but come on come on guys we know the truth here I knew there had to be a reason why the dad wasn't allowing op's parents to be involved in the kid's life and this makes perfect sense okay anyways back to the story that way op's parents can't use that leverage in a future custody battle he didn't even let them introduce themselves as their grandparents so they can't claim a relationship their dad is doing well now and those kids don't want for anything every Sunday night he hosts us to watch football and hang out with the kids his daughter Delights in serving everyone and they're so much better off without this witch okay the original post that op wrote was deleted obviously because she was getting blasted in the comments so unfortunately I can't read all the juicy details of everyone blasting op because she couldn't handle the heat clearly op is the type of person who run runs away from her problems so obviously you know I have a kid and having one kid isn't as bad as having twin boys that's got to be super rough twin boys and another girl who's just one year younger that's a lot obviously and I can understand wanting to take a break but for context when me or my wife are feeling overwhelmed and we want to break typically that translates into the exhausted person sleeping in in the morning and maybe taking a nap or something and the other person focusing on the kid throughout the day not Vanishing into Europe for two months which turns into half a year which turns into two years which turns into seven years and then okay I've cleared my head I'm ready to come back the kids are gonna be like who are you this story it's actually wild just how huge the dichotomy is between op whose I'm gonna cuss is a piece of let's be honest just an actual human piece of and then in contrast to that we have Opie's boyfriend who is an amazing human being not only op but his entire family his friends he's just he's just a great a guy who's surrounded by great people and they do the right thing every single day to to do the best thing for those kids oh man this is why I don't like to give out 5 out of 5 butthole scores so I can save them for people like you op easy as 5 out of five butthole score in my life can you imagine how narcissistic deluded self-obsessed you have to be to vanish without giving any advance notice and then come back like seven years later and when you find out that your ex-boyfriend filed for custody you're like how dare you say that without consulting me first okay but it's fine for you to vanish for seven years without consulting him first what that was our slash best of redditor updates and if you like this content check out my podcast where I publish the exact same episodes also hit that subscribe button because I put out new Reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 397,597

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Id: 7cdwdS9qx6g

Length: 14min 36sec (876 seconds)

Published: Fri Sep 01 2023