Questions YOU should ask while dating | Godly Dating Advice

hey you guys welcome back to my channel I'm so happy that you guys are here so as promised I am back with part two of the last video that I posted if you haven't seen that video please refer back to that video in the description so today we're talking about asking tough questions and so what I'm going to do is just straight-up give you guys some questions that will be good to ask personally I feel like you have to find some of those questions yourself maybe get into some prayer talk to God and see what are some things that you need to highlight someone also asked me well when do you know the right time to ask these kind of questions and I say just be the perfect be a person of Prayer be a person that's always always in prayer because I believe that the Holy Spirit will give you discernment on when to have certain conversations and when not to because what we don't want to do is scare it off the person that we're dating we want to make sure that they're comfortable and they feel free so definitely this is something that you want to consult the Holy Spirit with and another thing that I want to say is that don't also shy away from asking some of these things I say this because you don't want to get either in a dating relationship or in a marriage where the person has no idea what to do how to work things out my husband gave an example and he was saying how you would hate to get on a plane and then just to find out that the pilot knows nothing about planes wouldn't that scare you you want to know does this pilot know what he's doing does this pilot have all the tools to make these things work out so these are what these questions are all about um I do also want to mention that this video is for people who are dating for the purpose of marriage this is not about casual dating this is for the person where you desire a healthy and a godly marriage you don't want to waste time you want to make the right decision so what we're gonna do is we're gonna actually straight into these questions and for some of the questions I will kind of explain why but because I don't want this video to be extremely long I'm just gonna list as much of the questions as I can I think I have about 15 and then we can talk about them in the comments so yes stay tuned guys if you want to know what questions to ask while you're dating okay alright so let's get right into it so you want to ask financial questions how do you handle your finances do you have debt do you have student loans what is your credit score what is your relationship with money are you a spender or a saver these questions are important because why when you get to marriage and you guys are combining bait combining bank accounts or even when you are maybe about to buy a house together if a person has bad credit that's gonna affect how you buy a house it's gonna affect a lot so ask questions about the person's finances something about finances is that the person's debt becomes your debt if you are dating a guy that has a whole bunch of debt and he never told you and you guys never talked about it do you know that when you get married his debt becomes your debt so you want to be aware of that at least ask the questions and you guys can talk through it why did your last relationship end such a great question to ask because from there you're able to see like what kind of guy am i dealing with like does he have an issue with infidelity I mean why did the girl break up with him Chin's about what is the person's type I used to love asking my husband well what kind of girls did you date before me and I would ask him like why didn't it why didn't it why didn't it work what are some things that you know you're normally attracted to in a woman um so that you can work on that if you guys and you can and and maybe he'll he'll tell you that oh yeah I like this and I like that and maybe you'll see I mean that's not me that will never be me and then you don't have to waste your time I love scenario questions like what marriage scenario scenario questions one of them is if we got married and there was infidelity would you still stay with me if I lost my job how would you handle that if I made more money than you how would you handle that so these are like marriage like scenario questions that are great to ask how do you handle relationships with the opposite sex let me give you guys an example so my husband is very very friendly he had a lot of female friends well while he was single and when he was dating in his past relationships and so you know I did have to ask him about that like is this something that you're willing to kind of sever because you know I'm not comfortable with that and even the other way around you might be a female who you have a lot of guy friends you have a lot of brothers in Christ that you love to be around and you want to ask the person that you're dating are you comfortable with the fact that I have male friends how do you deal with that this is also a perfect way to see if a person deals with insecurity if they have things that you know they're really insecure about and you can find out if the person is jealous let me know in the comments what you guys think about these questions so far I love this one if I were to get pregnant outside of marriage what would you do hmm because the reality is some people are having sex okay and it happens and sometimes you will be an attempting situation and you'll have sex you want to know if the guy that you're dealing with what he is going to do is he going to just leave you or is he going to make some sort of plan where we can get married and he's going to take care of the child this is a great way to see somebody's character as well and know you should not be having sex while you're dating please don't do it sex is for marriage so if you're listening to this right now no it's not okay sex before marriage is not okay I just wanted to make that clear now what is your relationship like with your family are you able to create boundaries when it comes to family do you have family that you don't talk to why don't you talk to them are you close with your mom are you close with your dad what is your relationship like with God do you believe that the Word of God is true that there's nothing that can go against the Word of God do you have a personal relationship with God what does that look like do you go to church where do you go to church who's your favorite pastor who is your favorite preacher who do you listen to that question is important and it's great because you can now go and see what exactly does this person believe a lot of people claim that they're Christians and they're very lukewarm they don't really walk in they don't really walk in truth and it's just damaging any person can tell you I'm a Christian but just the values do not align another great question is what is your expectations for a wife do you believe in like the traditional roles of a life staying at home or would you be comfortable with me just solely being in my career and us kind of dividing household household responsibilities are you comfortable with that you know what are your thoughts are you able to be flexible because some people are not some people actually don't have the same views and it would suck to just get to marriage and there's friction because you want to go out and work but your husband doesn't it is not comfortable with that or even vice versa you you actually want to stay and your husband's not comfortable with that you can also ask them what are your career goals what do you want out of life where do you see yourself five years from now what is important to you what do you value as a person in life this is great because you know you really want to find out what is at the core of a person what kind of things do they value are they actually lazy with no ambition with no goal and no future the worst thing is to be with a person that has no vision and to my woman that are watching this video he'd carefully because a man has the vision of your family he is going to be the one that's going to carry and execute the vision of your family you're gonna be affected your children are gonna be affected by that your children are gonna mimic everything that your husband does so really make sure that when you're dating you know when you start to think about your kids and you you start to think about your future make sure that you are having these things in mind you know I'll even say that before I even go and ask some of these questions sit down and I want you to envision and dream with God what you will like your life to look like the impact that you want to make on this earth what you want to do for the kingdom of God and and then from there let's see about husbands and let's see about families and kids and relationships all right something's so important then you want to ask especially if you're dating especially in the beginning stages find out if that when that person who wants to get married because you may want to get married early on he might not want to get married till later and that can be a point of friction so you want to make sure that you know you're not in la-la land planning your wedding while the pair while he's kind of like yeah I'm not really thinking about marriage marriage is not important to me so find out what the person's timeline is if they have one you really want to make sure that the person wants to even go into marriage in the first place okay something that I was gonna say is the type of questions that you will want to ask is scenario like questions you know I love scenario like questions to kind of see how a person would react I used to love to ask my husband like what would you do if like we were walking down the street and a guy hits me or he cat calls me how are you gonna react cuz I want to know I wanted to know if he can protect me I wanted to know if he would stand up for me if people talk behind my back or talked disrespectful and in front of me it was important for me to have somebody that was able to protect me and defend me so I would ask him B's scenario like questions and sometimes they were really silly and they were fun but it still kind of helps you you know like it's amazing what like some of these questions can do sometimes they're fun and they just expose and they help you so take it easy and ask Holy Spirit to advise you another reason why I absolutely just love this is because from the answers that you receive from these questions they be they can now the answers that you receive can now become prayer points between you and the Lord you can go back to the Lord and say Lord I'm seeing this person and you know they said that they would not really want to work things out if if you know I wanted to really pursue my career so what should I do about this so God like you know or this person said that they have a lot of family hurts and they have a lot of in forgiveness in their heart towards their father so how are we going to work through this Lord and you can begin to pray you can begin to pray that God will reveal and help you these can become prayer points for your marriage I saw an online and it was is there anybody that you haven't forgiven that is a great question to ask y'all I could just keep talking about this over and over again because if he hasn't forgiven his mother if he hasn't forgiven his mother he is gonna be very very hard for him to be forgiving and truly love you a person that is holding on to unforgiveness is in bondage and so you want to find out how he handles different people how he handles family is he forgiving as he merciful ask you know as much questions as you can okay guys so those are actually all the questions that I have for now what I'm going to do is link to websites that I found and they provide like so many questions that you can ask while you're dating so I'm going to link that in the description if you guys wanted more questions to ask so in the second part of this video what I'm going to do is go ahead and and and address some questions that I've got from you guys but before I get into that I did want to say and I just wanted to give you guys some some advice um you know when it comes to these questions you know I mean I don't want anybody to idolize are still stressed out that they need to ask all these questions and stuff like that I don't want you guys to feel that way I do want you to know that it is important it's very important to ask these questions but it's just as important to observe to observe a person's character I pray that God would give you the eyes to be able to see through a person that you would see them truly as they are that nobody would be able to make you believe that there's something that they're not and you know that you'll really be able to step into a relationship or a marriage where your paths are just going straight to the Lord together not going crooked so yeah I just want you guys to know that it's important to observe observe even when the person answers you and they tell you their answers as you're dating them keep observing ask the Lord to help you to be able to see this person as they are I remember in the past when I was dating I remember the specific guy that I will take so long I'm getting ready so that when he would come and pick me up he was so mean he was kind of mean kind of agitated and I couldn't imagine dealing with somebody like that when I married my husband is so patient with me I mean he does get irritated sometimes but you know the Lord has anointed me and he's just been so patient but those are things that you kind of find out so observe so okay so adhara posted this post on Instagram and I felt that it was great it said see that man angry see him when he's angry with you see him sad see him stressed out see him grieving see him disappointed see how he acts under pressure when he's hungry or hasn't slept see him when he's fearful see how he handles his job see how he handles his parents and family see how he works in God's house because if you marry that man you marry all of the things that come with him that part because if you marry that man you marry all the things that come with him please stick around if you guys want some more little nuggets I'm actually gonna go ahead and answer some questions that I got um someone asked me how about those with significant others who aren't vulnerable I would say have a conversation with your significant other try to find out what has caused your significant other to not be vulnerable because vulnerability is actually very needed and relationships yes it is scary but especially if you're thinking about going into marriage this is a marriage as a is a place of like complete nakedness so you cannot hide anything the moment that you try to hide your feelings or you try to hide you know your emotions and any of those things it's a very dangerous place so I would say try to find out why the person that you're with can't completely be open with you what happened and definitely pray that if this is your husband that he'll be able to be vulnerable with you because these conversations need to happen and the lack of vulnerability cannot get in the way and one asked me well what about questions before you start dating the actual person I believe that it should be treated the same way I think these specific questions that I've said in this video I think they're good to ask in dating as well because I feel that you shouldn't just jump into a relationship anyways if you don't have the same values as a person if you don't even know where they're going I think you should have at least a bit of an inclination about that person of all throwing some questions in here do you watch porn what kind of like what kind of music do you listen to same thing do you believe in God what's your relationship like with the Lord how what's your devotional time like what does that look like I think those are great maybe entry questions and like I said I have a website that I'm going to link in the description that has great questions for those who want to want to really enter into a godly relationship someone wanted to know what are ways to include God in a dating relationship if people want a sent the Christ Christ centered relationship but they have both never done it before and it is foreign I think the first step is making sure that both of you individually really truly have an sumit relationship with god you can't bring a third person which is God into something without actually walking and knowing that third person you know what I mean so I would definitely make sure that both of you guys are chasing after God like crazy apart from each other before and then some great ways that you can practically bring God into relationship is do Bible studies together pray together you know go to different conferences church events me and my husband used to do that and it it when we were dating and it was so great like it bonded us we went to like different churches different like Christian events Christian concerts so you can definitely do things like that I hope that's helpful and then this last question someone asked me if I ever had doubts about my husband definitely had doubts because I kept asking the Lord to confirm even after God told me like this is the one I was like Lord are you sure because you know he's so different from anyone that I've ever been with I just don't see how this works and it was funny because I I didn't really see I remember in the beginning how me and my husband worked together but God worked it out and the thing about the Lord is he will always confirm his word when he says something and you will have peace so although there were times where there was doubt I had a lot of peace and so peace is a great sign peace that comes from the Holy Spirit and you will know that it's her MOLLE spirit thank you so much for watching don't forget to subscribe to my channel before you go and don't forget to like this video and share it with your friends I have a video that's gonna also come out this week so make sure you guys be on the lookout for that and that's gonna be three things three things that you should do before becoming a wife or before getting into marriage it's a great juicy video so y'all don't want to miss it turn on your post notification so you guys can get a notification when I post well I'm gonna keep drinking my water and keep growing this baby I'm tired so y'all gotta pray for me I gotta go and I really hope this video turned out well because I'm tired and I can barely breathe but I'm gonna show you guys my little bump and they do want to thank you guys for all the prayers and the congratulations so you can't really tell the bun from here but you can kind of see it here so yeah I just wanna myself yeah guys I don't actually wear real pants or things actually match in the house it's hot love you guys thanks for watching [Music]

Channel: Stephanie Hammond

Views: 12,404

Rating: 4.9791393 out of 5

Keywords: christian dating, godly dating, christian wedding, godly relatoinships, godly wife, wisdom, christianity, God told me my husband, marriage, christian marriage, godly, godly husband, dating with purpose, ashley empowers, stephanie hammond, dating advice, dating God's way

Id: Y6PzleIltr8

Length: 22min 44sec (1364 seconds)

Published: Wed May 13 2020