- [Interviewer] All right, Amber. - Hi (chuckles). - [Interviewer] Amber, where are you from? - [Amber] I'm from Sacramento, California. - [Interviewer] Sacramento. And tell me about your family, had both your parents growing up? - No, I grew up with my grandparents. I was raised by my grandmother,
my auntie, and my uncle. And my two sisters. - [Interviewer] Where was mom and dad? - My mom, she grew up on the streets, she got into drugs at,
like, the age of nine. - [Interviewer] Wow. - I guess the first time she, yeah. And she hasn't been right since then, I'm surprised she had kids. But she had us and then
my grandma raised us. And my mom, she's been on the streets, still on the streets till this day. - [Interviewer] And dad? - I really don't know too much of my dad. I mean, I know of his family, but him himself, I don't know too much. I just know he was a
drug addict like my mom. - [Interviewer] Oh, really? - Grew up on the streets, yeah. - [Interviewer] So you left
home at, you left your, is your grandparents
you were staying with? - Yeah - [Interviewer] And you
left them at what point? - I was like 13 when I start
running in and out of homes. Started living with my grandma when I was like, four, maybe. I think that's what my sister told me. - [Interviewer] And you
started at what age, working the streets? - 13. - [Interviewer] 13? - Mm-hmm. So, how much, what kind
of money will you make in a night doing this, or in a day? - A whole day and night,
at least 12, 1300. - [Interviewer] Wow. - That's just walking. - [Interviewer] Yeah. - But, I mean, I don't enjoy it, but I just, you know, fell into it. - [Interviewer] Yeah, yeah. - Was 13 walking through
a mall being fast, met a guy, he took my
virginity and told me, look, you're gonna get on this corner, and you're gonna bust this date. And you're gonna tell 'em this. And, I don't know, I just, I didn't like, the fact what I had to do for it, but as I grew older and
prone to everyday waking up, I have to do this, I
have to (hands slapping) make this money, I have to get this guy, it just got stuck into my program, like, I have to do it (chuckles). I have to do it. - [Interviewer] So, was he
functioning as a pimp for you? - Yeah, basically. - [Interviewer] How much of
the money did you give him? - All of it. - [Interviewer] All of it. - As a pimp, you can't get
half, you give 'em all. So, I didn't like that either, 'cause it's like, this is
my body, I'm doing this. Like why, why do I gotta, you know? I don't know. But I was young, and I was being fast and I didn't know what I
was getting myself into. And then when I got into
it, then I just got stuck. - [Interviewer] Have you
been arrested for this? - Plenty of times. - [Interviewer] One time? - Plenty of times. - [Interviewer] I'm sorry? - Millions of times. - [Interviewer] Oh, really? - Yeah. I actually just got outta jail
from out here on Figueroa. Undercovers. I'm fighting a prostitution
case with them, they got me on probation. It's just ridiculous. - [Interviewer] And do you
have children of your own? - I do, I have a six-year-old. - [Interviewer] Six-year-old? And who's raising him? Or her?
- It's a her. - [Interviewer] Her, sorry (chuckles). - No, you're fine. - [Interviewer] I don't
know how I assumed that. - My grandma is raising her. Kinda lost her, but I'm
trying to get her back, and it's kinda hard talking about that. Like, I don't wanna start crying. - [Interviewer] That's fair. - But, you know, she's everything to me, so I'm trying my best to get her back, but I know me being in this life it's just not gonna be as easy as a person working a job, and, you know, doing what they have to do
to get their kid, you know? Me, I'm just working on the streets, praying that she's gonna come to me. That's not gonna work
like that (chuckles). I had a choice to go homeless
or to provide for my family. And I chose to provide for my family, and sometimes you gotta make
sacrifices in this world. As human beings we gotta
sacrifice ourselves or something so we can survive. - [Interviewer] So have you
had some bad experiences with guys you've picked up? - [Amber] I'm not gonna lie,
and it's crazy you asked me. Two nights ago, I was
sitting on 80th and Figueroa, and I got in a car with a guy, a Mexican. He was cool, he didn't do nothing to me. He parked, some random kid from out here got in his car and... took my money. He forced me to do stuff
that I didn't wanna do, and then he started calling me dirty, like I was the dirty prosti, he started trying to make me feel bad and lower of a women than what I was. And it's already bad enough
that being in this life, and doing what I'm doing, you don't feel as much of a woman. You gotta make yourself. You
gotta put in your head like, I'm still beautiful, I'm still a woman. You gotta tell yourself. 'Cause everyday you're
going to meet different men, you're having sex with dirty men, like, you know, you feel less. You're already giving yourself up. So it's like, when he
came to me and did that it just, like, took my
whole dignity from me. And it literally happened two nights ago, so, I don't know why
I'm still back out here, and yet I'm still back out here. - [Interviewer] Do you
get depressed sometimes with this life? - I do, a lot. I find myself sitting in my
hotel rooms crying to myself. 'Cause my baby, 'cause I'd call her and she'd be like, mommy just come home. And I can't. I'm stuck, you know? And, it's not like I want to, it's like, literally I'm controlled. So I'm in this, like, I don't know, I feel like
it's the game controlling me to keep doing it. I don't feel like it's me or nobody else but the game and the money, you know? I wanna get out, but I'm 21,
I feel like it's too late. - [Interviewer] Did
you finish high school? - No. I was pregnant at 14, so. And I was hoeing at 13, so. I was like, ditching school just to go ho. I would lie to my grandparents, okay I'm going to school. No, I'm by myself on a track somewhere, making some money. - [Interviewer] Yeah, do you know who the father of your child is? - The father of my child, he's not around, but yeah, I do know. - [Interviewer] You do? - He kinda disappeared
because as I grew up and I realized in this
game I don't need a pimp. You don't need a pimp. They will lie to you and say, but that's 'cause they want your money to take home to their family, you know. And I grew up realizing that. And now my baby daddy was like, okay, well you don't wanna pay me, you wanna act funny and
keep your own money, so bye. But I have a daughter now, so
I don't feel like, you know? And I'm just like, one of those females I'm not gonna pay nobody no more. I been controlled, I been under guys, Like, I just, I can't. So my baby daddy was just like, fuck you, fuck the baby. Okay, so fuck you too, bye, you know? - [Interviewer] You're currently
working without a pimp? - Right now, honestly, I have a boyfriend, and I give him half my cut,
but he's not like a pimp. So he doesn't take my full cut. He don't control me when I go out there, he don't, you know? I do have a boyfriend,
(chuckles) I'm not gonna lie, I have a boyfriend, but
I don't have a pimp. - [Interviewer] When you were a young girl did you have dreams of a
different life than this? - I always dreamed of
being a real estate agent, or a flight attendant,
somewhere higher class, like cute profession. You know, I'm a white girl. I grew up with blonde hair. I feel like I should've
been behind a desk. That's how I feel. And like, I should be on the
plane being a flight attendant. I should be flipping houses. I have a good mouth piece,
you know, I could be a lawyer. I really wanted to be a
real estate, honestly. - [Interviewer] Yeah, it's
sad how many young women end up working the streets. I mean you see it where
you're at, they're all over. - I know a couple of girls out here that are younger than me, and I'm talking like 16, 15, 17. And I preach them, like, get out. It's not what girls, it's
not made for everybody. - [Interviewer] No. - It's not. This game is not made for everybody. You gotta be a strong
woman to survive this, 'cause I, I've been pistol-whipped, I've been shot at, I've been
raped, I've been kidnapped. Through this whole life, game. - [Interviewer] How do you think this life has changed you? You've been doing it for quite a while. - I think honestly, as a
person it made me strong. 'Cause if I never experienced
the things that I experienced just going through this life, I probably wouldn't be
as strong as I am today. Think it made me a strong woman, because I could still
wake up and tell myself, okay, you got this. You're still a good mother,
you're still a beautiful woman, you got this you know? - [Interviewer] What do you
think about your upbringing, your childhood? What do you think, if
something was different, might it have lead you down a
very different path than this? - Maybe a mom and a dad
that wasn't on drugs, that had two normal jobs. Was willing to raise kids
on a normal household, and just not on drugs. - I think that probably would've-- - [Interviewer] That's a big one. - Steered me to the right path. 'Cause there's been times
when I had to go on the corner to get rent money. My mom blew it all on drugs. And I have two sisters,
somebody has to feed 'em. I had to been the one. Somebody had to be. - [Interviewer] So you
were kinda taking care of your sisters, as well? - Mm-hmm. - [Interviewer] And where
are your sisters today? - They're all in Sacramento. They've got jobs now,
they're doing their thing, they're doing good. - [Interviewer] So a little
different path than you? - (chuckling) Way better
path than me, way better. But that's what I raised them to do. You know, I didn't want them
to have to suffer like me. It's not okay to be out here, it's not. It's scary. Any woman, any working
female would tell you it's scary to be outside. Jumping in different cars, not knowing when you're
coming home, you know? It's scary. - [Interviewer] And are
you using drugs at all? - I do ecstasy. I take ecstasy every day or every other day to keep going. 'Cause I work all day
and I work all night. So, I need something
to keep me up, active. Otherwise I'd just be like, I can't work, I'm tired, and
then I don't have no money. I gotta pay for hotel rooms everyday, I don't have my own place, so. - [Interviewer] So you'll
travel around from city to city? - Yeah, all cities,
all through California. From Sacramento, all
the way from here to LA, to Bakersfield, to everywhere (chuckles). Pretty much. - [Interviewer] All right. Well Amber, thank you so
much for talking to me. - No problem - [Interviewer] And good luck with, with your future. I hope you get to see or get
back together with your kid. - Yeah, thank you, I really do too. That's, like, the biggest goal in life. I appreciate it. - [Interviewer] Yeah, she needs you. Thank you. - You're welcome.
