- [Interviewer] All right, Valentina. - Yes. - [Interviewer] Valentina,
where are you from, where'd you grow up? - [Valentina] Uh, I grew up in Miami, up until I was 18 and then I left to New
York as soon as I could. - [Interviewer] And you're
living in Los Angeles currently? - Yeah, I've been out here
for the past five years or so. - [Interviewer] And tell
me about your childhood, you had both your parents
when you were young? - Uh, yeah, I had both my parents, um, they divorced when I was 18, they did that thing where like
they never liked each other, but they stayed together
'cause they had kids and yeah, but I had both of them. I still do. - [Interviewer] How would
you describe your childhood? - Um, (sighs) they did the best that they could, given the tools that they
had, and um, yeah, I think-- - [Interviewer] That's
a good way of seeing it. - Yeah. (laughs) I mean, I don't like
blame them for anything. My mom was always angry, so, even my dad would be like scared of her. She would yell a lot and, but besides that, I mean,
I just got like the, I would get hit, but I mean, nothing like out the--
- Nothing terrible? - No no, nothing too terrible. - Yeah.
- No. - [Interviewer] And what kind of a kid were you in high school? - Oh, I was bad. (laughs) I was really bad. Yeah, in high school, I guess, I don't know, the hormones and also Miami, I don't think is like the
best place to raise a child, I would say, there's
a lot of drugs and uh, yeah so in high school, I experimented a lot with drugs and uh, I had a lot of sex. Uh, but, yeah, I would skip class. I didn't finish high school. Around 16 I was like, I'm
gonna join the military. I thought that would be
a good idea. (laughs) So uh, I didn't follow through with it, I got in an argument with the recruiter and then that was it. But I got my GED and then I tried college, but yeah, high school, just bad. (laughs) I tried um, first it was weed, then I tried coke and then I did uh, acid, shrooms, pills,
pretty much everything except like the hard stuff, like, I never wanted to get lost and I was scared of getting lost, so, but thankfully, I don't have
like an addictive personality, so nothing stuck. - [Interviewer] Yeah, and
today you're just doing pot you said? - Uh yeah, like a couple times a year, for like celebratory reasons. - [Interviewer] So drugs are not really a part of your life now? - No, maybe like two
glasses of wine a week or something like that--
- Yeah. And what kind of work have
you done since school? - Everything. So, waitressing, stripping, I went to school for two years and I became an ultrasound tech. So I'm currently doing
that during the day. But yeah, I've had probably
over 30 jobs at this point. - [Interviewer] So you
have a straight job. - Yeah.
- As an ultrasound tech-- - Yeah. - [Interviewer] And then what
do you do with your other, when you're not working that job? - School. (laughs) I'm in school and then also I see men on the side. Uh, professional men, I guess. - [Interviewer] Yeah,
so this is through like, websites and things like that? - Mmhmm, yeah. - [Interviewer] So you would
call yourself an escort? - Uh, I'd call myself
a sex worker, but yeah, essentially, it's escorting. - [Interviewer] Right. - Mmhmm.
- Sex worker is such a vague term, I
have a hard time using it. - Well because I've uh, gone through other mediums or ways, I just, because I've done
stripping and web camming and um, escorting, and sometimes just uh, just straight up prostitution. I mean, not like on the street, but yeah so, I just say sex
work 'cause I've done it all. - [Interviewer] Mmhmm. How does stripping compare
to working as an escort? - So with stripping, you have to, you have to have a good
mouthpiece, (laughs) I would say and I don't have that. I'd rather um, the person knows what they
want, I know what I want and then we just get it
over with and go home, our separate ways. With stripping, you're
there at least five hours and I would come out of there with, maybe $600, but that's
also because I wasn't like doing anything in the back, I guess. I was just dancing, mostly,
'cause I didn't wanna talk-- - [Interviewer] A lot
of girls will do things in the back rooms? - Yeah, all the time, yeah. I worked in strip clubs in Miami and then also in New York. The ones out here aren't really that good, so I never did it out here. But um, yeah, it's tiring and exhausting. It wears on your body and everyone's smoking
and you just go home and you feel like shit the next day. Yeah, so. With escorting, it's a quick one hour and it's the same money. Like, I have a minimum, like I
won't leave unless it's $500, preferably more than that, but for an hour and then I go home and I
don't have to think about it until next week, so. - [Interviewer] Are there
dangers in working as an escort where you're probably picking up a higher caliber of customer
than working the street? - Um, (sighs) yeah, working the street,
I've never considered doing-- - [Instructor] Right, that's another-- - I never felt like I had to. So, I mean, everyone does things 'cause they feel like they have to do it. Like if I ever felt like I
had to, I would, but um-- - [Interviewer] I think that's a much more treacherous lifestyle
than what you're doing. - Yeah, for sure. - [Interviewer] But are there dangers in what you're doing as well? - Um, I've only had one
terrible experience, like it wasn't even, I
mean, I got drugged, but um, nothing worse than that. Yeah. - [Interviewer] How would you describe most of your clientele? - Uh, (sighs) rich, old, white men. (laughs) They either have their own businesses or engineers, you know,
just, they're normal, they're just lonely, mostly. - [Interviewer] Are they married? - Some of them, yeah. I actually ended up having
like a three-year relationship with one, like a normal-- - [Interviewer] Romantic? - Relationship.
- Where you, you actually liked him and he liked you? - Yeah, um, he was married uh, had kids and everything, so it's not like we were going
in with those expectations, but that's just what happened. - [Interviewer] Was it a
sugar daddy relationship? - Yeah. - It was, so--
- mmhmm. - [Interviewer] You didn't truly, I mean, it's a fine line and
it gets blurred all the time where, were you in love
with him, were you-- - No, we were in love, we
lived together and everything. He was just helping me out
with like $2,000 a month, that's not enough to like (laughs) make me stay, you know? Like I gave up a lot of things. - [Interviewer] That
would mean I've got about 30 of those kind of relationships
going right now. (laughs) - Yeah. (laughs) - [Interviewer] And where do you see your life going from here? - Um, well like I said, I'm in school, so graduate school, um, that's a good question, I mean, I don't, I try not to think too much-- - [Interviewer] How old are you? - I'm 25. - [Interviewer] 25, so you're very young-- - Yeah. - [Interviewer] You can go
in any direction from here, but this lifestyle that you're living, I mean, what comes along with it? Are there emotions that
it brings up or is there-- - Uh-- (sighs) - [Interviewer] When you're by yourself, do you sometimes have feelings that come from doing this kind of work? - Only if only during, usually not when I'm by myself. When I'm by myself, I like to like, compartmentalize, like, I'm like, that's what I do for money 'cause I'm only doing it, 'cause with my job, I make enough to like support myself and
live a normal life, I guess. - [Interviewer] Are you saving money? - Uh, I'm trying to, but the thing is, I take care of my mom and then I also take care of my sister. So I'm like financially supporting them. - [Interviewer] So between
your job and your side job-- - Yeah, I'm supporting three people, so. - [Interviewer] Yeah, right. - Um, yeah, so I'm trying to save money, but it's impossible. (laughs) - [Interviewer] Yeah, life gets expensive. - Yeah. - [Interviewer] Does your
family know you're doing this? - Um, (sighs) I think my dad knows that I was stripping, but no. - [Interviewer] So now you're
gonna do a video on YouTube-- (Valentina laughs) - Yeah, I'm trying to live more openly, I guess, and honestly and I don't think that, I mean, they would prefer I wouldn't. - [Interviewer] Of course, yeah. - But um, I think they just love me and. - [Interviewer] Your motive seems to be to help support your family. - Yeah, mainly. - [Interviewer] Which is noble, right? - Mmhmm. Yeah, I'm not out here buying,
like, Louis Vuitton bags and driving a BMW or anything like that. It's just um, what I
feel like I have to do. - Right.
- But, I mean, it does get in the way of me having like a normal relationship, I guess. - [Interviewer] Does it? - Mmhmm. - [Interviewer] I would
think most guys that might want a relationship with
you would have a hard time with you doing that at night. - Some guys don't mind. - [Interviewer] Yeah,
I'm sure there's (laughs) and there's always exceptions
to everything I say, right. - Yeah. Some guys don't mind, but um, yeah, it's not like an ideal situation. - [Interviewer] Yeah, I would
think I'd have a hard time if you were my girlfriend
and you're going off to entertain three guys tonight. - (laughs) Well, currently, I'm only seeing
one person, once a week. But sometimes, I'll have like, I guess regulars, that would like come-- - [Interviewer] Come and go. - Yeah, they'll just like text me randomly and then maybe in a month
I'll see like three guys. That's it.
- Mmhmm. - Yeah. - [Interviewer] Is there
shame that comes up from this? - Uh-- (sighs) - [Interviewer] You know, sex work and shame seem
to go together, so. I'm not saying there should be. - I'm sure people (laughs) I'm sure people think whatever
they want of me, but um, I don't feel that way. - [Interviewer] Yeah. You just feel like you're doing what you have to do to survive. - Yeah. - Yeah.
- Pretty much. And it's not like uh, I'm stealing or robbing or you know, like tricking anyone into anything. - [Interviewer] No, you're
providing a service and-- - Yeah. - [Interviewer] It's an
agreement on both sides, right? - Yeah. - [Interviewer] Do you respect
the guys that pick you up? - (laughs) Um, well I'm in school for psychology, so-- - [Interviewer] Oh you are. - Yeah. (laughs) So from like the human perspective, I try to understand and
respect them to an extent-- - [Interviewer] Mmhmm. - As far as like, you
know, they're lonely, they have whatever issues
they have going on, like I hear them out, I'm like
their therapist sometimes. - Sure.
- But um-- - [Interviewer] Do you
have guys that pick you up and will not want sex, they just wanna have a couple
hours with you or whatever? - Guys always want sex. (laughs) - [Interviewer] They do? (laughs) I get so many girls that tell
me the guys don't want sex and I'm like, "Really?" - They have a good mouthpiece probably. I don't, like--
- Oh I see. - (laughs) I mean, I'm an
amazing listener, but um, no, everyone wants to have sex, I think. What was the question? (laughs) - [Interviewer] No, just uh-- - Do I respect them? - [Interviewer] Do you
respect the men that are your customers? - Uh, yeah, from a
human perspective, I do, but as far as myself, no. Like-- (laughs) - [Interviewer] You wouldn't
want them for partners? - God no, they're disgusting. (laughs) Like um, yeah, I don't respect people who can't be
like honest with themselves. Yeah. Like it's one thing to lie to your wife and lie to your friends or whatever, but they're just lying to themselves, so, yeah, they're nasty, like, (laughs) they're just um, yeah, I don't know, no, the clear answer is no. (laughs) - [Interviewer] Yeah, I sense that. Do you believe in love? - [Valentina] Uh, I believe in love. - [Interviewer] You do? - [Valentina] Yeah. Uh I don't think that
love is just one like, sole definition. Like the people I love the
most would be my sister, number one, and then probably my mom. My mom and I have just been through a lot, particularly, like after after her separation from like my dad, she ended up losing her dad,
her mom and her best friend, like around the same time and then she lost the house, she lost her job and then she just like lost her mind, her sanity pretty much. She's always been like schizophrenic, like I remember when I was younger, she would tell me, like,
that I had special eyes and that I can like look at the sun for like a really long time. Yeah, (laughs) and she would um, she would just do some weird stuff, but for the most part, it
was like under control, but then after the divorce, like, uh, yeah, she lost everything. She like attempted suicide multiple times. I like left New York to come stay with her to like take care of her and the first night we
got like an apartment. She like jumped off of the second floor, like right in front of me. Yeah, that really messed
me up for a long time. But yeah, she's older,
so she broke like her hip and had to get multiple surgeries and she's been in and out
of like mental hospitals for the past uh, seven years, I guess. - Wow.
- Yeah. So, but the way that it's
affected me, I guess, um, I've kinda just been following like her, I guess, her footsteps, in a way. Like uh, not schizophrenia, no, (laughs) not as far as I'm concerned, but um, in October, I ended up going
to the psychiatric ward for like a suicide attempt and um, yeah, just like a lot of
generational depression in my family, I would say. - [Interviewer] Do you
think that's like, just brain chemistry or is it something that-- - I think so. - Yeah.
- 'Cause the first time I felt depressed I was like in forth grade. I just remember like crying in my room and I couldn't like explain
like why I was crying. There was no reason
behind it, I was just sad. - [Interviewer] The more I do these talks, the more I see that brain chemistry is a big part of the puzzle. - Yeah.
- Of everything that, you hear these people struggling with. - Mmhmm. - [Interviewer] All of us. - Yeah. Yeah, so I think (sighs) uh, yeah, I've had depression
for the most part of my life. Now it's okay 'cause after
I went to the hospital, they put me on medication,
so it's, I'm doing better. - [Interviewer] Does this
work you do affect you, do you think? - Um--
- I mean, does it make depression more, make you more prone to feeling depressed? I mean, if you believe in love-- - Mmhmm. - [Interviewer] But then you're
selling yourself for money, at some point there's a
conflict there that comes up. - It is difficult because I appreciate, like selling yourself
and not just your body because it is like
you're selling your time, you're selling uh, like a part of your soul, in a way. - [Interviewer] I didn't
wanna say those words, but that's kinda what
I'm referring to, yeah. - Um, (laughs) yeah, uh, I guess it does. And like the more you-- - [Interviewer] I mean,
I work as a photographer for advertising, so when
I do that for money, as I did yesterday, I feel like I'm selling myself. - Mmhmm.
- Just like an escort would be selling herself.
- We're all prostituting ourselves. (laughs) - [Interviewer] I totally see that and I believe it's all the same thing. - Yeah. Um, yeah, I mean, it does affect me negatively, I would say, uh, but I have reasons and I have, you know, that's why I, I suggest, like anyone
who's looking to do this, like to actually have like, maybe not a career, but like an actual job and like something to
look forward to and like, positive people in your life because-- - [Interviewer] Do you enjoy your day job? - Um, (laughs) I do because I like helping people. Like, I like that human connection. But it's not like what I wanna do for the rest of my life, for sure. Yeah, my goal is to be a therapist, so. - [Interviewer] That's great. - Yeah. Just because, I mean, I've been around, like
crazy people (laughs) and broken individuals my whole life, including myself, so. - [Interviewer] Yeah, I think we all are. - Yeah. We all just demonstrate
it in different ways. - [Interviewer] And the ones who deny it are the ones that are probably
the worst off. (laughs) (Valentina laughing) - Yeah, I think everyone needs therapy, like, at least at one point in their life for whatever period that is, but um, it's very, at least for
me, it's been very helpful. - [Interviewer] What have
you learned about men by doing this kind of work? The sex work? - Uh, (sighs) not much, to be honest with you-- - [Interviewer] 'Cause it's
not all men that do this, that will hire a prostitute. - Um-- - [Interviewer] It's only
a certain segment of the-- - I feel like I've
known men my whole life. Like, it's not, you don't learn anything that you don't already know. (pair laughing) Um, yeah, uh-- - [Interviewer] One of the
interviews I did last week, I asked the girl this question and she said, "Men are dogs. (laughs) "That's what I've learned." - It's uh, yeah, but some are loyal, you know, some dogs are loyal. (laughs) - [Interviewer] For sure some are, yeah. - Some are loyal, some
are cuter than others, some, you know, won't
hump you in your sleep, but for the most part, yeah, I guess. - [Interviewer] Yeah, it's a wide range. - Yeah. (laughs)
- I've learned that. Yeah, but I just, you know, because you work as an escort
and have this background, it's interesting to get
your perspective on it. - Yeah, no, I had an introduction to men at a very young age. Like, I don't know if
it's the sole reason, but like I guess my
introduction to like sex work started at like 12, pretty much. - [Interviewer] How'd that happen? - Um, (sighs) I had a best friend in middle school, her dad, at the time, I was like 12 and he was like uh, I don't know, like in his 50's maybe, or like late 40's, or something like that, he you want like the full story? (laughs) - [Interviewer] Well, share as much as your comfortable sharing. - Sure, I mean, it's just like-- - [Interviewer] You can
simplify it if that helps. - Okay. I mean it's just like 10 years of stuff. - [Interviewer] Oh really? - Yeah. But I can-- - [Interviewer] That
the sexual relationship with your friend's dad? - We only had sex one time. But um, yeah, like he met me and I guess, pretty much like fell in love with me and he was being uh, sentenced to prison. He lived in California
and I was in Miami and uh, he came down to see his daughter and I might not be getting
all the details right, so like, they're part,
but from my perspective, this is what happened and um, he was being sentenced to prison so he wanted to see her like one last time 'cause he was gonna go for
three years or four years, whatever it was. He met me on his birthday, which is October 1st, and I say this because October 1st there's just a lot of stuff
happens on October 1st, for some reason, for me. (sighs) So, (laughs) I meet him, he falls in love with me, essentially, we maintain touch for like, so I can keep him updated
on his daughter or whatever. He ends up like calling me, we used to talk on the phone all the time. He would send me like
love letters from prison. - [Interviewer] From prison? - From prison, yeah. He would send me poems and stuff. Then he got out, um, we maintained touch, he
would fly back and forth, to like come see me, um, uh, (sighs) I think I was like 16 and
this was like the time I was gonna go to the military, so, he like got a hotel for us and bought me like, all this lingerie and I just felt like really uncomfortable 'cause like I I didn't like, I wasn't attracted to him. I didn't like feel that for him, but at the time, I felt like, I don't know, I felt kinda trapped, like I didn't
have any like choices. - [Interviewer] Mmhmm. - Really, 'cause he was scary. (laughs) Like he ended up getting um, like my name, my initials, like my lips, a portrait of
me, like tattooed on him. He has like my mom's initials, like he's not like a sane person. (laughs) - [Interviewer] But this all began, not sexually, but the
romantic part of it for him sounded like it started when you were 12? - Yeah. - [Interviewer] Wow. - Um, he would like ask me
for like nudes and stuff and I was like, $50. (laughs) Like, I would sell him my
nudes for like $50 and um, at the time, like that's a lot of money for like a, I guess I was
like 14 at this time, or 15. Yeah, but back to the
night with the hotel, and I just felt trapped, and he was like, "Okay, that's fine, we can
go home, I'll take you home." But my parents didn't know I was with him, obviously, so I'm like,
"No, I can't go home, "like I have to stay." And um, yeah, we had sex, um, for like a minute and then
I started crying. (laughs) And in my mind, I was just like, uh, (laughs) not that I deserve this, but I guess like, in a way, like, I put
myself in this situation, like no one told me to do this. Like, I'm here, like, I guess. Um, I guess this is what I deserve, I guess. Like, it's the way that my mind like-- - [Interviewer] Would you
say it was your environment, was it your brain chemistry, was it something that
happened in your childhood, what would you say
opened the door for that? Or was it just he just pressured you? Or pursued you so heavily? - Yeah, he would just make me feel bad, like manipulate me into into feeling like this is what I-- - [Interviewer] Yeah, that's
what it kinda sounds like. - Yeah, 'cause he was like 50
something and I was like 15. But um, yeah, and then fast forward he would send letters to my dad's house and like, you know, send bouquets, like edible
arrangements to like my job and like just show up and um, when I got in that
relationship with that man that turned into a
three-year relationship, um, he helped me, like get a restraining order 'cause I just couldn't do it. Like in my mind, I was like, I can't, like he's gonna go back to prison, like something's gonna happen to, like it was like a a weird dynamic like where I didn't want him to get in trouble. Like, I cared for him even though like, he was (laughs) threatening me all the time and um, stalking me, whatever. I don't know what it's called, but yeah. Just making my life very difficult. - [Interviewer] Yeah. Being an attractive female
has it's burdens, doesn't it? - I don't consider myself uh, attractive, like-- (laughs) - [Interviewer] You don't? - No, I like, consider myself neutral, I guess, 'cause I'm just myself and this is, I mean, I definitely
use it to my advantage to get money and whatever-- - [Interviewer] Right. - But um, like when I go home and
like take my makeup off and I'm just there by myself, like I'm not like, oh,
I'm so pretty. (laughs) - [Interviewer] You don't
see yourself that way? - No, I just see myself as
normal, like a person. (laughs) - [Interviewer] That's
probably a healthy attitude, but you are beautiful-- - Thank you.
- you should see yourself that way. But what's the most important lesson you've learned in your life? - Um, (sighs) I mean, I had a negative view of life for, up until a couple months ago, so, I guess, just to be present. Like right now, I'm not thinking like, when I leave here or I'm
not thinking like before, I'm just like right now,
this is what's happening. And uh, yeah, just trying to be present. - [Interviewer] That's good. - Yeah. - [Interviewer] That's a great one. - Thanks. (laughs) - [Interviewer] All right, Valentina, thank you so much for sharing your story and I wish you the best
of luck with school and your two careers. - (laughs) Thank you so much. - [Interviewer] Thank you. That was great.
