Prison: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

our main story tonight concerns something Americans simply can't get enough of prison we we love to be entertained by it from orange is the new black to seemingly MSNBC's entire weekend programming to the TNT classic Tim Robbins stand shirtless in the rain the movie we love prison so much a shocking number of Americans are currently inside one as we learned last week during a House Judiciary Committee hearing our nation now has the greatest number of prisoners of any country in the world nearly one in every 100 adults in America is in prison or jail that's true we have over two million people behind bars right now we have more prisoners at the moment than China than China we don't have more of anything than China other than of course debt to China and it didn't it didn't always used to be this way our prison population has expanded Eightfold since 1970 the only other thing that's grown at that rate since the 70s is varieties of Cheerios cue fruity Cheerios your trumped-up Froot Loops and you know it and look look our prison population has exploded for a number of reasons from the dismantling of our mental health system to mandatory minimum sentence laws which help explain why 97% of people plead guilty to federal crimes rather than risk going to trial to of course drugs because half the people in federal prison are there on drug charges and it accounts for a quarter of admissions to state prisons and of course it's tricky to know how to feel about all this because on the one hand the war on drugs has completely solved our nation's drug problem so that's good but on the other hand our drug laws do seem to be a little draconian and a lot racist because while white people and African Americans use drugs about the same amount a study has found that African Americans have been sent to prison for drug offenses at up to 10 times the rate for some utterly known reason it to me it reminds me of a joke you know black people who commit drug offenses they go to jail like this whereas white people don't go to jail at all okay so many people so many people are incarcerated in America right now it's become one of the things that Sesame Street has to explain to children my dad's my dad's in jail when I was about your age my dad was incarcerated too incarcerated is when someone breaks the law a grown-up rule and then they have to go to jail or prison just think about that we now need adorable singing puppets to explain prison to children in the same way they explain the number-7 or what the moon is and at least Sesame Street is actually talking about prison the rest of us are much happier completely ignoring it perhaps because it's so easy not to care about prisoners they are by definition convicted criminals in fact it's so easy not to care that we are really comfortable making jokes about one of the most horrifying things that can potentially happen to them go directly to jail do not pass go do not collect $200 and do not I repeat do not drop the soap look doubloons don't drop em you know what if we were in prison you guys if you like my we're going to federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison what you got any idea what they do to eggs in San Ricardo prison it ain't over easy oh do you get it you get it the egg is gonna get against its will that's why it's funny look wake up your children and explain that joke to them they'll love it go we are somehow collectively able to laugh about references to the fact that 4% of prisoners reported being sexually victimized in the past year one in 25 now that might not sound like a lot but think of it like this if every time you bought two dozen donuts one of them had been raped you'd be pretty upset and those are pastries prisoners are people if you if you don't know a prisoner or think that you're ever likely to become one then their safety and healthy is not going to be high on your list of priorities you don't need to know anything about the conditions that they live in but you know who should know but maybe the director of federal prisons and yet watch him almost comically struggle to recall a basic detail about one of the most mentally excruciating things prisoners can be subjected to solitary confinement how big is a cell how big is the average cell in solitary say that the average sized cell yeah the size of the cell how big is it what is I'm trying to get this is a human thing we're talking about we've got a lot of statistics how big is the cell the average size of a cell is I guess I'm 25 you're looking for the space of what the yes the dimensions in feet and inches the size of the cell that a person is kept in I want to get some idea of I don't know am I asking this wrong no you're not you are not asking it wrong as far as I can remember you're just asking what the style of the cell is but but it was a long time ago and and to be fair he did eventually get an answer the average size should be equivalent to which six by four what six by four a couple of things there one that was clearly a guess and two six by four is barely an elevator that that is the length of a six-foot party sub by the length of the amount of that party sub that's left over the following day cuz nobody wants party sucks look people put their hands all over them they're disgusted know what that's not the point that's not the point but thankfully a few minutes later the record was corrected for don't you actual is ten by seven for the cell size Oh ten by seven step this way your highness plenty of room for a ping-pong table and an imaginary opponent as your mind slowly becomes untethered what is clear so far is that we are doing a terrible job of taking care of people that it is very easy for all of us not to care about but here's the thing increasingly we aren't taking care of them at all private subcontractors have steadily been taking over certain services like the aramark corporation who provide food to prisons and a promise that with Aramark you can expect more more savings and hey look when you're being thrifty with food costs what's the worst that can happen record shows 65 instances where aramark employees failed to provide food or ran out the private Aramark changed recipes to include cheaper sometimes substandard ingredients Aramark correctional services made headlines recently after maggots were found in food served at prisons here in michigan that is not good the only time when you are happy to hear the words maggots were found is when you are a maggot whose family was lost at sea we floated three days on a piece of bread but we never lost hope and it's not just food being privatized it's prison healthcare to Arizona tried that guess how it turned out medical spending in prisons dropped by thirty million dollars and staffing levels plummeted 50 people died an Arizona Department of Corrections custody in just the first eight months of this year compare that to 37 deaths in the previous two years combined 50 deaths at this point you could hire the people who pretend to be doctors on Grey's Anatomy and you would probably have a lower mortality rate and a lot more intrigue cutting costs has led to some incredible things happening in Arizona one prisoner had a c-section in jail and this is how she says they treated her they decided to use sugar kitchen sugar what do you mean they use kitchen sugar um the packets like McDonald's the sugar they would open it pour it inside and put gauze over it and tape it up and and had to do that for like three weeks and they pour them in your c-section yeah did they tell you why they were doing that one of the doctors learned it from I don't even know I don't know but basically it's a home remedy sugar was used to treat wounds before the advent of antibiotics back in the early nineteen hundred's yeah but then we all decided it was no longer an acceptable medical practice like curing a child's cough with heroin well he's not coughing anymore yeah he's not really doing much of anything anymore and I can't find any of the good silver look you will never pay a political price for treating prisoners like this woman badly you don't even need to pretend to care here is how one Arizona lawmaker responded to her story that doesn't sound like a true allegation that sounds ridiculous no prisoners have you know 24/7 to think up allegations and write letters I'm not saying that that some of them can't have a basis in fact but you got to take them with a grain of salt or in the case of the hospital maybe a grain of sugar somewhere in hell Satan just sharpened his pitchfork and said to his secretary do me a favor Janis and let me know when that guy gets here okay I just want to be ready many states are even contracting out entire prisons nearly 9% of prisons are currently run by private firms like geo group and Corrections Corporation of America who had combined revenues of over 3 billion dollars last year their publicly traded and while their marketing materials emphasize how much they do to help their prisoners rebuild their lives their pitch to investors has been a little bit different in a recent investor presentation CCA pitches its unique investment opportunity another reason investing in the jailing of people makes good financial sense high recidivism oh but that is a great way to reassure your investors look look look we see your concerns you know what if we fully rehabilitate the prisoners and they become fully functional members of society well don't worry that's not the kind of company we're running here don't worry once we're done with these prisoners they're like human boomerangs they're broken right in the middle and they keep coming back the key problem with running prisons as businesses is that prisons are then run as businesses pay and staffing ratios are so much lower than a geo group youth facility in Mississippi sometimes had just two officers overseeing as many as 256 prisoners that facility eventually closed but only after a federal judge wrote that physical and sexual abuse was rampant there because its operators had allowed a cesspool of unconstitutional and inhuman inhuman acts and conditions to germinate now I know that geo will say that presents an unbalanced picture of their company so in the interest of balance I will point out that they've got an award from the state of Florida citing their bold and innovative cost-saving business practices although I think we all know when the state of Florida gives you an award that award is basically sarcastic in fact a quick side note the award was signed by Florida Governor Rick Scott who has led the drive for prison privatization in his state but on one condition what I've said all along is that yeah this is not dirty for detectors this table I just saved money there's no way we'll do this we don't say money as you know Phil says if we don't save at least 7% we don't do prison privatization hey hey listen if you think Rick Scott is gonna look the other way for a company with a history of the physical abuse of minors for savings of a mere six percent you don't know Rick Scott okay Ricky needs seven Ricky one seven Ricky like seven okay now if you happen at all to be interested in asking Rick Scott about the conduct of the geo group for goodness sake don't do it tomorrow night he's busy we actually checked and he's going to be at a fundraiser at the home of and this is true the CEO of geo group I believe the theme of that fundraiser is a cesspool of unconstitutional and inhumane acts look this is this is all so depressing private prisons are bad yes but the whole system just seems fundamentally broken you know what I think if you don't mind I need a minute I too need some help understanding this if you don't mind hey Joe you seem sad yeah I am sad Timmy it's just I've been looking at the prison conditions in America and the whole system is just so horribly broken yeah I know what you mean my daddy's in jail right now for a low-level drug offense you think that's exactly what I'm talking about to me that's crazy well my daddy's in jail because he killed four people yeah well okay he's actually a dangerous individual who needs to be in jail so that's not really the same thing my dad is in jail and people pay money to see him yeah that's actually a zoo that's different he's in a zoo okay but it looks the same to him well let's not conflate the two always gone okay hey hey Dad how barely broken is the prison system yeah I can't believe I'm gonna say this but one prison actually put sugar in a woman's c-section oh wait a second what's the c-section oh yeah um oh wait wait what you mean like the letter C yes yes yes that's what I'm a he thought that that's exactly what I mean yeah yeah that's it make you feel better if we thing about it it's that that needs to be spoken America's prisons are broken it's a hard truth about incarceration prisons are needed for a civilization but mandatory minimums for heroin and crack stack the system against Hispanics and blacks a prison population is bigger than Slovenia cuz we put people in jail instead of treating gets the funny yeah I know they put my dad in jail cos they say is a monster Oh what what what did he do nothing they just said he looked like a monster well that's racial profiling and that's wrong too okay here's a fact that needs to be spoken America's prisons are broken prison conditions are a national disgrace weak violence Onegin and possibly rain and we shouldn't lock up reptiles just to look at their face those are zoos those are zoos your dad is an alligator in a zoo I'm a crocodile I'm a crocodile oh geez you evilest oh we all look alike right no no that's no website like no no you can't put that on me that is clearly not what I was saying that's so ignorant oh it's a fact that needs to be spoken America's prisons are broken is brought to you by decades of neglect no lack of political Curie a generous donation by the G oh yes well as viewers like you

Channel: LastWeekTonight

Views: 10,502,752

Rating: 4.9111881 out of 5

Keywords: last week tonight with john oliver, prison, puppets, hbo, geo, cca, prison rape

Id: _Pz3syET3DY

Length: 17min 42sec (1062 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 20 2014

Reddit Comments

[u/Hmm_Peculiar]

I think this show is just amazing!

He talks about flaws in society, serious issues that are not often talked about because they're complicated. And all the while he manages to be very serious and very funny.

[u/xLite414]

Wow I'm surprised they uploaded the whole segment, 17 minutes damn.

HBO is certainly doing this show justice, I love how much freedom and support they give John. Now we just need need hour long episodes. Keep it weekly as it gets rid of the fluff and the 24-hour-news-channel-non-news but I can't see any harm in bumping up the weekly dosage to 60 minutes. Especially without add, that'd stop poor John from having to rush through everything constantly quieting the crowds cheering to save time etc.

But yeah, no doubt I've fell in love with this show. It's just great all round. That sesame street bit at the end of this week's episode was fantastic.

[u/MrCaul]

This is horrifying. Completely fucked up and disturbing.

But yeah, seems like a really good show.

[u/ex1187]

This show is so great. I've laughed out loud several times at each episode. I really loved the #betterCIAtweets last week

[u/ericharrisr]

Saw this clip last night. I think John Oliver may have just surpassed 'The Daily Show' with this singular clip.

[u/ConstableKickPuncher]

I wouldn't normally recommend listening to comedy news podcasts long after that news is no longer news but John Oliver's podcast The Bugle is incredibly funny. They are currently on hiatus until September but it is one wonderful show of irreverent news related comedy and bullshittery. Quite worth the listen.

www.thebuglepodcast.com

[u/semi_mad_man]

Never watched the show before, does he take a very leftist tone in the style of the Daily Show?

[u/[deleted]]

Ah, Monday. I see it's time for the Jon Oliver update.

[u/lenny247]

aramark runs my cafeteria at work! fuck, no wonder. the "fresh and healthy" section features white rice everyday ... no quinoa, no wild rice, no brown rice, not even basmati !