NATALIE'S WORST COLLEGE HOOKUP!!

what's up guys welcome back to views views is now sponsored by doordash and you can save 25 on an order of 15 or more when you use code nash at checkout and also thank you to squarespace and quip for sponsoring this [Music] podcast [Music] i got into an argument with one of our friends the other day i feel like we've talked about in the podcast before but but uh actually maybe we haven't because now i'm embarrassed to say but i sit while i pee is that weird we have talked about it i don't think it's that weird as an older guy yeah i'm pretty tired most of the time i say while i pee and i don't think there's any problem with it at all i never sit when i pee when i'm at somebody else's house but when i'm at my own house like i want to be sitting i'm sure it's like fine for you to sit when you pee like who cares you do whatever you want in the bathroom but it like when i think about it because when i think of a guy peeing i think of them standing up you know but when you sit down it's like weirdly reversed so it's like i think of when a girl pees if i was peeing standing up that would be kind of weird yeah now that it's completely different i just don't think that's sitting down is much better yeah like on the floor remember when i peed all over your back i've been sitting down at your house ever since yeah i sit in my house too i i i don't stand anymore listen wait why did you pee on the floor you just panicked well there was like an emergency and you were running out everybody was running out and i was like i better pee because i don't know if we're gonna be back and everyone was screaming at me like jj and i just went in and i pulled my pants down and it was dark in the bathroom no the lights were on it just went everywhere such an old [ __ ] person [ __ ] that's so weird do you stay along on sitting down you're not supposed to do that you know you don't sit there and read every time i go to the every time i go to the bathroom for no matter what it is i tell myself i'm like i'm gonna enjoy this one and i'm gonna sit here as long as i can i [ __ ] [ __ ] you not every time i go i'm like i have my phone i'm just gonna sit here and i'm just kind of like gonna have a moment but every time i [ __ ] finish i'm done i go i gotta go like why am i still sitting here this is disgusting right do you ever get that are you ever like do you ever plan on making a bigger day at the bathroom and then it goes it gets shorter [Laughter] is that so funny you got an umbrella and a sunscreen magazine a little picnic i don't know i know what you mean i sit in my car after i work out it is kind of similar just sit there you know what it is procrastinating i thought i was talking just like battling like who can finish the sentence [Laughter] another thing i was thinking about super unrelated to peeing maybe you don't remember this but nat do you remember this do you remember like when you would walk into a classroom and you were like a freshman in high school but your teacher also taught like the senior class and you walk in and you see things in the back of the classroom and you're like oh my god what is that or like maybe you'd be scared and the teacher would be like oh don't worry that's for my physics class eighth period and you'd be like yeah like that i don't know why but that's just a random feeling i wouldn't i experienced that i was a freshman once i know i've looked in on senior classes but every time i like reference anything from like high school or college days you just like [ __ ] have no idea what's going on really yeah it's like you've never sat in a classroom like because i forgot everything we blacked it all out speaking of high school i remember david well actually i think this might have been like at the end of senior year like the summer out of senior year so everyone's like out partying doing random stuff right and david never went to parties in high school in general so i get invited you did get invited but david wouldn't go anywhere unless john alex and mike could all go as well oh yeah that [ __ ] bummed me out like i was i feel like i was on the cusp of like like i could like i was kind of like divergent so so like you guys hung out with everybody yeah so i i hung out with like everybody but like my friends wouldn't be invited to certain parties and i was like i'm not [ __ ] you're on the cusp of being cool yes yeah yeah like definitely no one would ever be like he's popular but they'd be like when you ask about me you'd go i know david yeah that's what you would say yeah i know that's what you'd say but you're a horrible thing to say i know what about him can't come to the party with those [ __ ] idiots but yeah yeah so i yeah i wouldn't and it was weird bringing three guys to the party like i no one ever liked vernon hills makes you make it sound like it's like l.a no they can't bring dudes to a party in vernon hills like that's just isn't that kind of like that's just high school in general no dudes like too many dudes unless you're like friends of the guys like no new dudes no secondary friend groups of dudes can come in like that's just [ __ ] up if a dude is having a party it's his guy friends and whatever girls they want to bring and trust me if me alex and john and michael went to party we'd throw that vibe off real quick [Laughter] what happened um but i remember we went to this party and david was like hey want to hang out tonight or whatever and so i like was like sure and he came over i was literally in pajamas like nothing you know whatever just thought we were gonna be like sitting in the car driving around the neighborhood having a little good time no that's not what david had in mind like he got some like text to go to some party in like [ __ ] nowhere yes and when we pull up to this party we don't know a single person there i don't i don't even think you know the person that sent you the address but we went it was someone's birthday and they were also going to the military it was their going away party and we showed up i don't even think we knew it was like in his basement and it was like a high school party it was like 15 year olds 14 year olds and like 20 year olds it was like the weirdest [ __ ] mix and it started out totally normal everyone just hanging out in the basement talking to people whatever and then his family comes down there's a bunch of like little kids running around like children and there's people partying like drinking alcohol whatever and i don't know how we found out but then a couple minutes later or whatever we found out that it was a trap house like this person's dad sold drugs out of this house so it's the [ __ ] best part you could ever go and i was like okay david like red flag like you know we should go and he's like no no that wasn't the red flag the red flag was when the strippers walked in the [ __ ] this is the first time i've ever seen a stripper in my life yeah we're 18 we're like what the [ __ ] is going on i don't even know if you're 18. i think we're we have a 17. yeah like it was like all kids of all ages were at this [ __ ] party it was like chuck e cheese but with strippers um and yeah these strippers just came down and we're just like what the [ __ ] i've never [ __ ] seen i don't think i've ever seen boobs at this point like this was like [ __ ] big and then um we're all a bunch of kids and the strippers weren't getting paid like no one brought like singles with them to like pay the strippers new with the surprise i would have listened to the bank if i knew strippers were coming 100 no one knew that there was any strippers there at least we didn't and so the strippers were they were dancing for probably like 10 minutes and they were like [ __ ] this or whatever they went to the back room and they're like we're not dancing anymore so this person because no one was throwing money because they're pissed yeah this is how they're gonna make money and the dad comes out who is this big scary like drug dealing man yeah and he was like nobody's [ __ ] leaving this place until these strippers get paid everybody put your cash out right now and he closed the [ __ ] door and i was like are you [ __ ] kidding me like i'm like like and there's like a little window that's like like natalie we got that the way we gotta get out yeah it was bad how'd you get out you had no cash no i had a nine millimeter in my back pocket just shot it into the ceiling i'm [ __ ] leaving um no i don't know i people ended up paying the stripper oh you know what and also before the strippers came down they confiscated everyone's cell phones too so we didn't even have cell phones yeah so we couldn't and we were like locked in this basement stripper yeah so we couldn't even sell these strippers or like cash at these strippers it was like how are we supposed to pay them like no one had a heads up that they were coming they were surprised like how do you pay surprise strippers at a 16 16 year old birthday party oh my god that was the craziest and i was like i don't think i went out with david after that i was like what did you just get me yeah we didn't hang out a lot in high school i feel like it was only a couple times when you would have a night like that that was crazy would you tell your parents what you did um very rarely i like telling them like like dangerous things but like that was like not worth explaining to them like if i like got high yeah i'd be like i smoked weed and they'd be like no you didn't i remember i remember actually the first time i told my dad i smoked weed i think it's the only time he goes ha ha nice try so they never believed me but he's never david either he told me he told me the first time he got high and i was like i was like no you didn't you didn't do that because i didn't even do it bro i got [ __ ] high as [ __ ] when i was in high school like like that used to be my the first time actually only like six times but like when you're in high school that's a [ __ ] lot because it was completely illegal to do it and like we'd have to hide in [ __ ] in like a cul-de-sac smoking in like if headlights came on us it was like game over and i remember the first time i smoked yeah we went to we went to taco bell i got a beefy crunch burrito bro i will never [ __ ] forget and then we also went to uh the first song i listened to was collard greens by schoolboy q um so it's like the best song to ever get hi to and then we went to dunkin donuts where nick salerno was puking his brains out right by the car the rest of us went in and the other half of us went around because dunkin donuts throws out their donuts in a bag yeah so so we were going to wait till they threw the donuts out and then we claimed them all and then we brought them back nick's [ __ ] puking his brains out but we had a bag of like 300 donuts now um so we hit it big but yeah no i loved that that was my favorite part about dude high school will never like there will never be anything nothing nothing can ever that's why like i i actually feel for people that like like our homeschooler like have never like gotten to feel or like are working from so like early on like you know like people like justin bieber that like got to miss like high school like kids who missed their senior year this year right right yeah that's like it's this sucks because we're literally talking to a lot of senior like this is the podcast that people listen to and i feel bad but like it is the best years of your life and i'm so sorry you're missing it i'm sorry for a lot of people it's not and i know for me it wasn't right i couldn't wait to get out of there oh that's true that's yeah like there's i think there's a lot of people there but i think that's why high school's so interesting is like is like whether you hate it or not like it's gonna end like what happens in high school will never dictate what happens in your like you know what i mean you can be the coolest and you can be a loser in the future yeah and you can be the nerdiest and you can be the coolest in the future that's what's so cool about high school is it's the only thing in life where you seriously get a like refresh like you literally you in high school you can dabble and find out like what the [ __ ] you're doing or what you are and then you get to hit a refresh button during college and then you probably get to do it again when you graduate and you can keep doing it but like high school like you know it doesn't dictate who you're gonna be like you're just growing up and you're learning [ __ ] so like that's the best part about it so even if you're having a bad time like it'll be over you're good i feel like when i was in college that was when i like met people like me i met like funny guys and stuff people said hilarious dudes nice to definitely some losers what would you mean bro it's not that funny the way you the way you put the cup up i i was fully believing that you complimented me the first thing you said was hilarious dudes and i was like oh i was wrong and then you said no it's so funny how many times like if you like edit all the compilations together of like how many times i've insulted you with the same insult and you found it the same amount of fun like i've called you what do you mean like i've called you no like it makes sense like you mix them up yeah but i call you oldest [ __ ] i call you a loser and i've and i've said it like in in probably similar ways but like every podcast is once a week so it's like it seems new every time i say it but like if you were to add them all up it's literally just me calling you a loser like maybe 50 times and you're going oh my god we should cut that together like it's the first time i'm calling you one jay did you forget that one thing at the store yes i did what is it i the the diapers that you wear did you know that you can get snacks drinks and household essentials including diapers in 30 minutes with doordash oh you did yeah let me just skip this ad then yeah doordash connects you with the restaurants you love right now and right to your door and now you can get the grocery essentials you need with doordash too get drinks snacks and other household items delivered in under an hour ordering is easy you open the doordash app choose what you want from where you want and your items will be left safely outside your door with a contactless delivery drop-off setting with over 300 000 partners in the u.s puerto rico canada and australia you could support your neighborhood go-to's or choose from your favorite national restaurants like popeye's chipotle and cheesecake factory i love cheesecake factory i think doordash is the best name oh we were arguing about this the other day yeah i think it's really good really good better than views no views is a great name oh but doordash does have that nice ring to it for a limited time you can get 25 off and zero delivery fees on your first order of 15 or more when you download the doordash app and enter code nash that's 25 off up to 10 value and zero delivery fees on your first order when you download the doordash app in the app store and enter code nash don't forget that's code nash for 25 off your first order with doordash subjects to change terms apply hey yeah big one coming from that side you know what why is it when a girl burps it's like so cool oh actually but i have the complete opposite story there was this there was this time we were we went to we went out this was like what two years ago we went out we were at the we are at the club and like a couple girls came back with us to i think it was zayn's place yeah zane's place and one of the girls i like really like anyway we're sitting around zane's house and i don't know what the [ __ ] we're doing but out of [ __ ] nowhere this girl goes dude the biggest [ __ ] bird the whole room like silence really like i mean you could tell just by natalie's reaction like that i was bringing up the story like the whole room went [ __ ] quiet there was like 30 of us in the room like it was a full party but bro the entire [ __ ] room like just shut the [ __ ] up and it was so scary and what did you say everyone got silent it was super awkward so i was just like it was me it was like the manliest burp you'll ever hear yeah and this girl was like so tiny and sweet so it's very confusing no i think it was just like she just had to burp and so she just burped it like she didn't think anything of it the next day she natalie was like what did you think of that girl because like she thought she saw that i was interested in her yeah yeah and then i was like and i was like i was like i think she's cool but did you hear that [ __ ] like it's like like sonic boom of a burp and i had no idea it was the girl that gave her that what that went from her and i was like yeah like she remembered the [ __ ] burp like it was like a it was like a bomb dropped at the party yeah no that was like a one time when i was like jesus i mean the burp was insane and i know it sounds like we're exaggerating but when you were there it was like it was like a commercial burp like something you were trying it almost felt like she was just trying to like out do her personal best yeah like someone else burped and she was just like watching this yeah it was like a superhero burp like the walls should have been though the wanda vision burst yeah like all the walls should have collapsed in the house yeah like it was that it was that image fbi is like trying to get in past the burp she's holding the town hostage with the smell doesn't this feel like a uh if you just look at this side of the screen it looks like wake up denver you know what i mean like we're like on like a morning talk show oh totally yeah and then over here yeah it's like we haven't decided what to do with the sat we're so guys for the audio listeners we're in a set right now you can watch all these podcasts on video it's so great because we have [ __ ] six hd cameras pointed at us it's like it's like a really cool change of pace um and these cameras are on throughout the night they just like stay on for some reason and no one turns them off last night i came in here and just i [ __ ] i couldn't resist it i took my clothes off in front of the camera because i was so curious no i swear to god actually yeah i wasn't last like two nights ago but i was so curious because i was so curious what like my naked body like looks like on video because there's a little monitor where you can see yourself right and i was just like what is like my penis what is my butt what does everything look like roll back the footage no you can't they're not rolling right they're not rolling yeah but but they are on and they're displaying to the monitor and the best part is is like one of one of the cameras actually projects into the living room yeah so like if you're sitting in the living room you can watch the video back so luckily there's no one in the living room that saw nanny gets up for a cup of water yeah um but but no yeah i sit in front of the camera it's so it's such a bizarre experience because i think i think i don't know 99 of humans have never stood in front of a camera but naked and the camera had 15 pounds um no i was like it was very like mirror-like but it was like it still it felt like an image of me like it was very very strange i i didn't hate it i didn't hate it we did the wheel of dyspo recently where we where we drove around town with this dispo wheel and you could either win a dollar or you could win a brand new tesla and we had two teslas to give away it was a lot of [ __ ] fun um and we went to like a bunch of influencers houses natalie went how was it um it was my favorite i spent the whole day why are you talking like you [ __ ] hated it you like pause and then you went like it was because i love it david you liked it don't let him know that you hit yourself inside he finally goes it was my favorite i spent the whole day driving around in a [ __ ] bus it's just a very very long day like you know and you have to talk to like a lot of people it's right it's exhausting um and if the wheel landed on a dollar we donated a thousand dollars to united we dream and we spun uh we ended up spending like 27 times 27 different people spun so we were donating 27 000 so the united we dream which is pretty cool but natalie on her story natalie on her story accidentally put 28 000 which is it's not a big deal at all but like it would have been funnier if it was like like dan from the ceo of dyspo called me he's like yeah it was 27 spins but now they put 28 on accident so we're just going to have to pay the 2 000. that's fine but it's just like could you imagine if like natalie accidentally put like you know 120 or like 28 million some off number but yeah um so that was a quick mistake but it was it was really fun so so the way we do it um so the way we do it is uh two people can win the cars but we don't actually buy the car so the cars we were driving around with are um the rentals and then when you win we order you the car that way it's in your name and and all that stuff it's easier it's easier to transfer titles and stuff that way so the cars we had were rentals so we rented these cars and then we had and i didn't know that we were doing this and we i swear to god sure no no i didn't know we rented two teslas the ones that like i like the configurations on and then natalie and taylor and ella took them to get the cars wrapped so they took these cars that were other people's cars and they got them wrapped as we were wrapping it was being wrapped overnight to lime green because all the teslas had to be lime green the guy texted us the guy that owned the tesla and he goes hey my window and my trunk is open is there any reason it's because every door has to be open when you're wrapping a car yeah um and they're like oh sorry no it just parked in my friend's garage so like we [ __ ] lied to this guy about ramping his car i was like what the [ __ ] and then it came the day where i announced that we're doing this giveaway and i showed off the teslas and ella gets a call immediately and and it's a text and it's like by any chance is my tesla wrapped in lime green right now and she goes yes and he goes can you please keep it i'm the biggest fan and i got on the phone with him because i was like [ __ ] i gotta talk to this guy like this is crazy and i was like listen i'm so sorry like this is what we do your car will be totally fine like yeah yeah and he was like i don't care if you want to give it away i'll buy another one give mine away like i'd love to be a part of this he was so [ __ ] stoked he's like he's like at the least at the very least can you just keep it wrapped for me when you give it back wow yeah so we didn't even have to unwrap it when we gave it back to him he just took it back lime green but i thought it was so funny that this guy found out that his tesla was wrapped he's like yeah i saw ella rented the car from me and then i saw your insta story and i put all the dots together and i was like holy [ __ ] my car's wrapped green what about the other car and the other car we just returned okay but then natalie and ella they decided to keep going oh because you guys already promised to go to other people's houses yeah we had like a whole route planned out for the entire day and the entire morning like we had so many spins nobody was winning nobody was winning even all our friends spun yeah and i was like if my friends win they probably shouldn't win but that wasn't even a problem because it landed on nobody winning um but the entire morning no one was winning and then they had the two winners but they had to go to another house right after because they were promising these people all day i was like and we were behind because obviously it's a big setup big production and i was just i felt so bad and i was like we have to go i was like they probably won't win the tesla's you know whatever and so we went and they ended up winning like two more teslas two more [ __ ] people on the teslas and i got a call and and at first there was like elle and natalie really excited they were like the two teslas were ones yeah and then i got a call and like an hour later two more were one and i was like i thought we only had two and they're like well we have to get four now so i so we have to we have to buy an additional two but it's great because like everyone that won like is either like they really needed a car or they're giving it to like a family member that like oh good definitely needs a car so it wasn't nobody wanted that was like a [ __ ] millionaire and you know what i mean like the right people want it which was sick well i appreciate the marriage i want to come you're the merch and then i have a tesla parked out [Applause] jay and natalie squarespace empowers millions of dreamers makers and doers by providing them with the tools they need to bring their creative ideas to life on squarespace is all one platform you can build the website claim a domain sell online and market a brand their products combine award-winning design and world-class engineering make it easier than ever to establish and own your online presence from beautiful templates to powerful ecommerce tools to help customers launch their ideas into the world to build their brand squarespace tools are diy in nature meaning anyone can learn about use or create them without technical expertise yo jay nat i know you two are always thinking about creating websites always why the hell are you not using squarespace i do use scripts it's so simple don't yell at me sorry it's just so easy you can gain powerful insights about your site's visitors and how they interact with your content with their in-depth website and analytics tools use squarespace's marketing tools and integrations to help drive traffic to your site or grow your brand when you create a website with squarespace you get free unlimited hosting top-of-the-line security and dependable resources to help you succeed nothing to patch or upgrade ever by the way and 24 7 award-winning customer support check out squarespace.com views for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use the offer code views to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain this guy made a tick tock about um getting a cheap flight to miami yeah and it was about taking spirit airlines like spirit airlines is like obviously the cheapest way to fly and all the comments are so [ __ ] good like the top comments y'all trippin spirit not even that bad we just had to bring our own plane so it goes spear not that bad the walk to miami wasn't even that far from where we crashed [Laughter] spirit not that bad we all just had to jump at the same time to get the plane off the ground oh my god spirit ain't that bad for real they even landed the plane in the street right by the hotel this one's good spear not that bad four penguins named skipper private rico and kowalski ran it it's a reference to madagascar spirit isn't bad we just had to use our feet to stop the plane when it landed this is a good one it goes spirit airlines is actually the safest to fly right now because they're the only ones with outdoor seating that's really good bro it's so great that everybody agrees that spirit is like a [ __ ] janky ass place to fly does spirit ever acknowledge that though like do they ever like play animals they should it's so funny like just like they should make a commercial where the plane's just going down i they're probably bad for business though it kind of makes sense but they wouldn't do that the plane's like going down all the passengers passengers are like at least we saved all the money or like something like yeah right yeah that's like that burger king ad what happened with the burger king ad burger king uk tweeted well i saw that [ __ ] women should stay in the kitchen or women belong in the kitchen but they were trying to say that most chefs are only 20 of the chefs are women so they're saying we should hire more women wait so they wait wait they tweeted they just tweeted what did they just tweet women belong in the kitchen just that yeah but was there an article the following tweet oh my [ __ ] kind of explained it like we're you know we need to hire more do you think they did that well yeah according to um that's what i've heard yeah it was like we were talking to somebody yesterday and you think that it was like intentional like to [ __ ] get a stir out of people because it's like not the right thing to say no matter what yeah that's i mean i thought like maybe some guy was like oh this is funny you know and like you know i'm trying to be funny but it's also just like so wrong but i could also see that getting by like six people at burger king like i could see like a room like i could see they didn't tweet it uh for us they only tweeted at uk the waters over there i feel like they knew before we bring this humor to america let's see if it works over here it was also on international women's day that was their campaign right oh [ __ ] so this is like okay but that's so crazy if they did do it on purpose and then got all these bad articles written about them and then they were like yup that's exactly what we wanted how about how about just burger queen oh that's good [ __ ] it's better than what they had i've never seen a burger queen ad that is true no like actually like why don't they whatever i don't want to go into birth burger queen's pretty burger king specifics i i have security out here now oh yeah the other day i ordered post mates and i don't know why this was so crazy but like my security stops everyone at the door no matter who they are and they walk up to the door with them and he walked up with the postmates guy and i opened the door and the postmates guy hand is literally [ __ ] shaking and he goes i'm sorry that's it i always i felt so bad yeah and i was like it's okay i ordered this and you should look up his name and well i tipped him well oh you did no i [ __ ] said don't ever do that again what are you talking about i'm sorry i'm [ __ ] 80. you know you know there's ways you can get tips over to them nobody he probably has a phone number uh no but that was just [ __ ] i felt so bad that's really funny the security guard doesn't walk me up but the security's working well you're on the pre-approved list and you're not a threat do they have like a picture of me and stuff i think he just notices the limp and he's like what the [ __ ] what is scott gonna do you're also here like every day i think he knows you've been right we also have a bunch of guy different guys out there we don't [ __ ] around bro we've gotten some threats i asked him the other day i said i said you get bored out here and he goes no i'm studying right now and i said so you're doing two things at once and he goes yeah but don't tell me but don't tell david no he didn't say it at all he said uh he's he's you know who walked back alex ernst came the other day oh my god [ __ ] alexander walked right in and i got to get past security and he goes security i go are you [ __ ] kidding me and i had to go outside and be like guys the game watch the gate because the guy literally he but it turned out he was on the pre-approved list too but i was like how the [ __ ] did he get past i was like so confused ilya told me the story the other day that he learned from somewhere so it's like botched to the second degree so like i'm gonna mess it up but joe you can add on to it because they talked about it on their podcast basically there's there was this guy there's they were on a ship and a big wave knocked over the ship and completely sunk the ship but it kind of landed upside down so like where you could crawl out of there wasn't it because the the top of the ship was on the sea floor so like all the doors were shut and um all like it was like 11 crew members on the ship died they drowned except this one guy who at the moment the wave hit it was like five in the morning something um he went to the bathroom and the bathroom like created an air pocket in the ship and he got to stay there and he stayed there for a little over two days he was in this air pocket and he just sat there and divers came the first day but they couldn't get down there they couldn't stay there long enough so then on like the second or third day new divers came to recover the bodies and there's literal footage of these divers in the [ __ ] water like going through the shipwreck and then all of a sudden a [ __ ] hand pops out and grabs one of the divers and they're just going he's live he's alive and they [ __ ] they pulled him out he stayed for three days and he thought he was only there for 12 hours but he was he was just sitting there like for three days and then when he came up when they brought him up to see he had to stay in like an incubator thing for like two days too because of the the pressure like in the water and everything like [ __ ] with his like cells or something i don't know what it was but like yeah [ __ ] [ __ ] insane i also just said this story in about 40 seconds but like this is a [ __ ] insane story though like he had no idea and he said that like all you can hear was like all you would hear is like the ship hitting like you would hear the ship like you know creaking back and forth because waves were hitting it and you would hear like fish eating the remains of the rest of the passengers on the ship and that [ __ ] insane and this dude [ __ ] this dude survived this is real i swear to god it's real joe the video like [ __ ] me up afterwards yeah the video was terrifying it was so scary because you see him like he's like on top of like shipwreck stuff and he's just sitting there in complete darkness literally for three days this is the dive the diver's going around right now looking for it all right he's alive like they literally just thought they just found another dead body oh wait oh he's just standing in there isn't that [ __ ] insane it doesn't makes no sense it's really scary wow and then he like he like suffered from survivor's guilt which i guess is like it's like why me what about the pressure at the bottom of the ocean too like i don't understand how he was able to just chill there and i think it was the amount of air that was in there like he got away with that and then when he was when they pulled him out of the rack like he had to come up in stages like it wasn't like he just popped up and he was like i'm back how deep was that he said his ears would pop i don't know how deep it was not because his ears would pop i think cause he just [ __ ] his insides would probably explode yeah he was like under there for so long it was just like sorry he had to like decompress like imagine like when you're coming from like space like you know you gotta like there's like precautions you gotta take you gotta go into like another tank to like get you back to earth it's like when you take like a sprite bottle and you like turn it upside down right and then like there's like a pocket of air i've never seen that like so it's like a cup of water what you ever done that when you were a kid no no i get it what you're saying but i'm just not sure that's the same thing as you know it's totally the same it was there for three days [Applause] julie's comparing it to his experience with a sprite bottle my seventh grade science class i love chewing gum like chewing gum is the best too and do you guys like chewing gum by any chance love it i just said i did well quip reinvented the toothbrush and now they've done it again for chewing gum wait what is it quip q-u-i-p it's a gum toothbrush it's actually good for your oral health it comes in a dispenser just like pez like like the candy pez and it's cool slim and it's easy to carry literally anywhere quip can help prevent cavities and freshen breath when chewed for 20 minutes after eating it's sugar-free with zero calories and a long-lasting mint flavor that's pretty freaking sick that's really interesting i've heard about their toothbrushes we need this here to see it wait it's upstairs i'll go get it we have it we have the question okay wait i'm getting word that we have the quip i actually have it right here sorry podcast listeners but it's on video it literally pops out like a pez wow and there you go oh my god it's freaking delicious it's so good it's exciting when you see somebody get it right all right because i've never gotten it right okay jay in my life i just i'm so tired of losing you can get the dispenser in five different colors and packs up to 10 gum pieces at a time just shut up it fits in any if it's in your purse or pocket anywhere anywhere you can imagine it fits it's extra safe and hygienic in addition to gum quip also delivers fresh brush head floss and toothpaste refills every three months from five dollars shipping is free so you can save money and skip the misery of in-store shopping spread good oral health habits and join over five million miles already using quip get chewing for less than two dollars per gum pack and if you go to get quip dot com slash views right now you can get a free plastic dispenser with any refill plan that's a free dispenser at get quip dot slash views that's spelled g-e-t-q-u-i-p dot com slash views you can also find the quip electronic toothbrush refillable floss and more on the oral care aisle at your local walmart quip the good habits company what's your most simplest pleasure um like for me a cup of coffee in the morning incredible incredible i i mean just recently dude it's like a [ __ ] no no i'm down the people wanted more jason in the pot [Laughter] so i'm like so here go ahead no no no hang yourself i'm all here sorry i'm just looking at joe i'm biting my lips pleasure um marvel movies i love watching movies so yours is coffee tell me about it well you know i get up in the morning and like as soon as i wake up i go [ __ ] yeah yeah i'm gonna make a cup of coffee and it goes it's black what about you imaginary guest i mean i just recently literally this week started journaling in the morning get the [ __ ] out really journal about just like my life [Laughter] can you share can you read can you read something what are you like like a diary kind of like a diary like i just want to like document everything like one of my friends one of my oldest friends she was like we had such an amazing week last week so many awesome things were happening she was like i hope you're right you're journaling so that one day like people can like relive like what you're going through because our lives are so unique and so you know by just insta stories those go away for 24 hours right not if you save them you go to archive that's your journaling but it's like therapeutic at the same time like me you're like just sitting there with my own thoughts just writing how long is it it depends i mean my first entry was like eight pages whoa what eight pages what were you journaling about i know what it was it's moving you were sad no no no you weren't saying it was just me just yeah natalie recently moved out of here i know and it was the first night when she was leaving and she was walking out the door and i was like so you're going and she was like yeah i'm going to my house and i was like what do i do i was just sitting on the couch it really felt so crazy i was like what do you want me to do she's like i don't know go to bed watch a movie and i was like i don't know like you want to stay for a little she's like no i'm tired this house is great and i when i left last night i felt bad for you it was thank you i did i walked back in yeah to like say something to you and then i noticed that people have a hard time leaving and i and i can feel that it's just for me i'm leaving him here alone yeah because it's so it's so big yeah that i don't know if you'd want to live here i like it though but like i also like don't like it it's like this like then when ali left i was like hell yeah i'm [ __ ] that's when i was like sure i'm gonna take my pants off and go to the podcast studio and whip my dick around like that's when i got that feeling you know like that's when i got excited but yeah anyway back to journaling so oh yeah so what did you write well i wrote about i was like i literally started out i was like what better time to start a journal than literally right now oh [ __ ] this bring it in here can i read the page i'm so curious i say some bad things but i'm just kidding um i'm so curious what a journalist can i have it here yeah i carry it with me i'm like okay let me read it all right okay okay okay here it is i have now i cannot believe that you're giving your journal over to david well because i it's i've just started it so it's not like i've really gotten into the nitty-gritty this is crazy matt her first lineup it's really cheesy it's really first her first line is i'm journaling she goes finally i've always wanted to start a journal for therapeutic reasons but the same reasons that made me want to journal also pretended also prevented me from doing so anywhere here anyway this is hard to read my handwriting's really sloppy yeah anywhere here that's just me it's a combo anyway here i am and what better time to start than literally what feels like has been the best week of my entire life oh she goes i think this is me peeking for starters david and i started a disposable camera app a year and a half ago and now i run it i am the ceo of it david we'll burn in hell it's called dyspo and it is the digital disposable camera that is meant to restore joy authenticity into photo taking sharing and social media wow it's really sweet the best things tend to be unintentional and i can say that for sure the majority of my favorite life occasions have been unintentional like falling in love with david when i first moved to life oh wait a minute matt tell me when you want me to stop when i walked in and i saw him shirtless standing that natalie yeah definitely now you know you're lying because when i saw you sure i did not fall in love it's just like mumbo jumbo about like yeah yeah it's like i announced that i am in sports illustrated swimsuit 2021 although i agree that some of the other models are crazier and way uglier than me no but this is sick okay i just wanted to read like some parts just so like oh my god this is really sweet why are you so embarrassed what did i write she's so embarrassed the ending is really sweet she's talking about sports illustrated and she goes they wanted to know natalie the business woman entrepreneur activist influencer creative not natalie the assistant and that was really [ __ ] cool [Laughter] now you got some balls for [ __ ] letting me read that that's that's pretty cool but yeah this is this is [ __ ] sick matt natalie's journal natalie's journal now available worldwide and on amazon natalie congratulations on this my next guest comes from a long line of swimsuits do you think your journals will become more expansive like like stories and stuff and because that was that was very like day one journaling jesus christ you think it you think this [ __ ] will get any better man i didn't think it was bad yeah [ __ ] roaster yeah but why you gotta do that i'm not roasting her i'm saying it was very day it literally was like a day one journal i'm saying i wonder if it would get more expensive what do you mean more expensive like i don't know like she could tell like she she tell the story that she told tonight on the podcast in more detail there well of course stuff like i think that their first couple pages like the origin story of the journal you can't just dive into like not a marvel movie like todd blue coming to my eyes on accident today you can't give the journal that right what i don't know i don't know how he's going to turn about in [ __ ] four months did you see yeah i think lubed in my eye no blue coming to my house i don't think i've ever like shared this story but have you guys ever had like i've had a yes what oh no i don't know why i thought you were going there that's so weird i thought you were like this is no that's not where you're going never mind i'm sorry what just happened i was thinking of something else and i just jumped yes i jumped to a conclusion because i was thinking of my own story and i was like oh my god this is the same thing but it's not unless yours was about experimenting and fingering your butthole on the top wait was that what you're no no no no no no no no no no oh my god i know i'm just like i just remember when i was younger sorry i don't want to derail your story here but like when i was younger i put one of my fingers at my butthole to experiment but i thought i don't know why i think you've derailed it i'm sorry how was that even like how did how did i have no idea i think i just spaced out what were you saying good news is my story didn't have much to it so it's nice that i got to just punch it into the middle of yours continue what's the rest of yours just one finger by the way and it was done and i know i didn't like it hey he didn't like no okay what are you gonna say my story i feel like everybody has like that one like super weird like hookup story or whatever right and i only have one it was halloween and i was we were drinking whatever having a good time at a party and um at the party we were like making out like on the side of the party like on the wall which is like so not me i don't just like randomly make out with somebody in the middle of a room of people and i was like okay like this is about to go down you know whatever and i left the party with him we like walked back from this person's house back to like campus or whatever to go into his door this is the most interesting part for me what did you say like you want to go back to my place oh no i didn't instigate it oh sorry i'm sorry sorry i'm not a [ __ ] no i was just like i don't really i don't know exactly what exactly happened but like he like couldn't get hard couldn't really like stay hard or something and so it happens you know it's a lot of guys actually and so it was just like kind of awkward and like as soon as like literally within the first five minutes i was like okay this is like this is just not like a good like this isn't like a positive like situation i was just like hey whatever and i remember like he like took his like penis and he was like dude look at what she's doing with her fingers and he like took his penis like it's like a little snail that he had around he showed his penis and like i was just like laying there in bed like this pretending like i was asleep but i wasn't and he like took his penis and he like picked it up and he like dropped it on my side oh my god and then like i wasn't i was like i was just like okay whatever like he'll stop i think he's just like really [ __ ] up or something and he did he did it like three or four times i think he like wanted me to like wake up to like hook up with him instead of going like this he was just dropping his dick on you yeah that was his way of going hey literally and then within like and then he was like knocked out like within like three hours or something i was up the whole time yeah and i just like snuck out and then i like didn't really like talking i didn't sit next to him bio the next day i didn't really talk to him it was like super awkward how did you when you were leaving did you drop your tit on him to say goodbye we were just talking about the ultimate next move for david uh no you you're like challenging me to do it you're saying you're saying to hook up with your ex-wife if if you could pull that off i'd i'd probably give you a major problem i'll say this to you i'll be completely honest i am attracted to you she's pretty lazy i think she's very attractive you do yeah do you really yeah that's really sweet wow yeah she's very pretty yeah yeah so is there anything super fun too is there a possibility well she has a boyfriend right who's pretty pretty tough is she into younger guys uh how would you feel about that if i did it i mean i wish you luck man yeah yeah i mean i wouldn't do it just for the sake of our friendship but like i also feel like you're so cool with that [ __ ] so it wouldn't i am pretty cool like if you made her happy i'd be super happy right i mean just with her boyfriend now well no i wouldn't i wouldn't want to date her but i would like hook up with her if she would be down well we have to get her in here like i said she's out there right now in the living room watching on the tv so come on in mar that'd be so sick she was shrunk by a laser this morning i just lift her up here we go from the tiny desk hi marnie how are you i hear i turn you off no but i i do get like that i don't if somebody like like she's happy now or their boyfriend like that makes me happy i mean that if you could show marnie a better life you know living in this house she'd probably be pretty happy she'd probably have to change a lot of things really she'd change the studio around for sure this would have to go the gaudy as [ __ ] this does not fit her taste at all she's also jewish oh so that's not going to work this is going to be brutal yeah i should probably change this cut your hair probably change the carpet change the drapes make sure you can't go out with your friends when you want to uh hold you down tie you down make fun of you for not making as much money as her i think your ex-wife marnie would love this this is a picture of her grandmother yeah and i have it i've had it here for a while since the podcast started i feel like that's something she'd enjoy yeah i put it in here for good luck this is alice did you mean to grab it in such an old way did you see that i thought you were doing a bit i'm having hip surgery april 9th what do you want from me why do you keep promoting that hip surgery like it's a live show [Laughter] meet and greets after guys talk about that [ __ ] i should wake up from the surgery in about an hour and you're ready to sign anything you want to talk about every time you bring it up you're like it's april 9th come into the hospital near you that'd be sick all right guys that's all the time we have today's podcast thank you guys for listening thank you jason and natalie thank you david for being here um it was a blast make sure to go follow all the social medias go check out natalie's entrepreneurial uh moves that she's making and uh journal will be coming to a store near you journal will be coming we'll see you guys soon my name is jeff bye [Music] you should start dating somebody yeah you do what do you mean why are you asking me like you've had a choice go ahead pull the trigger all right i will

Channel: VIEWS

Views: 2,359,419

Keywords: Views, Views podcast, the views, David, dobrik, Jason, Nash, joe's teeny weeny podcast, vlog squad, vloggers, top podcast, video podcast, comedy podcast, natalie, mariduena, worst college hookup, tesla, dispo, giveaway, boat story, trapped, underwater, journal, journaling, embarassing

Id: 2dzBS-Ib1G8

Length: 46min 17sec (2777 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 11 2021